Dark Wishes

By Corrinne S

Published on May 2, 2003

Gay

Note: This is a gay themed fantasy novel about kings and magic, love and war. Although I will often allude to sexual encounters, there are no scenes of sexual acts for this is, by and large, a love story. This author claims exclusive copyright to the characters, settings, and plot.

Dark Wishes

M.C. Gordon

Part Two: Karandal

Chapter Four

The long years of war were over and the evil that had started it was gone. Karandal, Duke of Enworthy, closed his eyes and thought of peace. He had known war his entire life; had been raised with his brothers toward the day when they would take up their swords and fight. He had done well in the final battle and earned the praise of his King, Llewelyn.

Disappointed, but not surprised, he had stood by Trelaine when Llewelyn crowned the new King of Elanen.

He longed to kneel and promise his fealty to the Qell, but he was already sworn to Llewelyn for Enworthy was a province of Endril.

Karandal opened his eyes and gazed across the small campfire at Trelaine. The long black hair fell forward across the sharp angles of his face and hid his eyes. Those eyes were what had first caught Karandal's attention. If they held any color at all it was pale silver and a man who looked into them could see the reflection of his own soul.

He had, quite frankly, fallen in love with Trelaine. His affection went beyond the man's child-like view of the world, each new discovery bringing a smile of pure delight. Karandal thought he could detect an honest love for life and respect for all living creatures. He was truly surprised that he had fallen in love over the past few weeks because Trelaine's sudden fierceness in battle evoked fear and the remembered childhood stories of the Qell coming at night to steal naughty children.

Trelaine was traveling with King Llewelyn as he took his weary army home to Endril, to seek advice and council before assuming the mantle of leadership in Elanen. They traveled slowly, no matter that each man wanted to return quickly to loved ones, for the wounded were many. Each evening Llewelyn explained to Trelaine what would be expected of him as a king, hoping to revive still more dormant memories. Karandal, grasping at each precious moment of time with the one he loved more and more each day, offered to share his tent with Trelaine.

The summoning had agreed, suddenly expressing an inexplicable fear of darkness, as if some other memory was trying to rise, unbidden and unwanted. There were still many parts of his nature that had not unfolded to him and he grappled with himself each day, unsure of who he was expected to be.

As the sun sank below the horizon and shadows lengthened, Karandal saw a momentary panic flit behind Trelaine's eyes. Finishing the last of his ale he handed the cup to his squire and rose from his seat on the ground. "Come, Majesty," he said as he crossed to where Trelaine sat. "It will soon begin to rain."

A cold wind began to blow and they barely reached Karandal's tent before a torrential rain began to fall. Karandal's body servant, Petel, had already prepared the tent for the night. Soft blankets covered mattresses of straw and a small fire was lit, safely contained. Petel helped remove their heavy cloaks and boots. Assured that his master and the new king had no further need of him, Petel sought his own pallet under one of the supply wagons.

The party would reach the mountains that marked the boundary between Endril and Elanen the next day and Trelaine would leave them to return to Aolane, a kingdom nearly destroyed by evil and treachery, starvation and death. Karandal knew that if he were ever to confess his love, it would have to be now.

"The night turns cold, Sire. Perhaps if we share a bed and our blankets we can keep each other warm."

Trelaine, in his innocence, accepted the kindness and concern of his new friend and companion. He had no memory of ever having loved or being loved. The memories that had returned to him were of war and battles, not of gentleness and a lover's embrace. As the night grew colder Trelaine eased himself close to Karandal for the promised warmth and comfort. Finding peace and contentment, he slid into an easy sleep.

Trelaine was unsure what woke him; he only knew that he was lying with his head on Karandal's shoulder. Strong harms held him in a safe embrace. Thinking Karandal asleep, he reached up with one fine-boned hand and stroked his fingers across his friend's cheek.

At the feel of Trelaine's touch on his face, Karandal slipped one hand beneath the king's chin and lifted his head slightly. Seeing the silver eyes look up at him, Karandal leaned his head and gently brought their lips together.

A distant memory ran through Trelaine's mind -- of loving hands and sweet embraces, gentle touches and passion beyond imagining. The kiss he received from Karandal seemed natural, correct, familiar. He knew they belonged together and surrendered himself to the love that was offered to him so willingly.

Chapter Five

Aolane was astir with activity and had been for months. Trelaine called in masons to repair the crumbling walls of his fortress castle. Years of debris were removed from each room and the stone floors scrubbed clean. Master carpenters filled the castle with new furniture and weavers worked diligently on tapestries that would cover the walls. Gradually, the castle began to show a glimpse of its former glory.

Trelaine received a courier from Enworthy informing him that Karandal would arrive soon for an informal visit. He wanted his home to be as perfect as possible to greet the man he had fallen in love with months earlier. His days were filled with the thousand things needed to restore prosperity to the ravaged kingdom, aided by the lords of Elanen. But his nights were lonely and filled with longing for the blonde-haired man who had captured his heart.

He requested his lords be present at a formal dinner to welcome Karandal, the first celebration to be held in Aolane in centuries. His hunters had already provided pheasant while the fishermen found salmon and trout in great abundance. Ancient herb gardens, cleaned from years of neglect, gave the cooks a variety of seasonings to choose from.

Trelaine agonized for hours as he waited for Karandal's arrival. He wanted to wish for time to pass more quickly but had learned that his wishes could have drastic results ... like the ripples of a pebble tossed into a pond. So he poked his head about the fortress, constantly checking to see that everything was perfect while he waited.

Memories of protocol had not yet returned and the King relied upon Olan, the captain of his personal guard, for advice. Olan had been with King Llewelyn since childhood and had spent his life around courtly affairs. He had been assigned to help guard the witless Trelaine during the first days of his existence in Endril and felt friendship for him. When Llewelyn proclaimed Trelaine King of Elanen, Olan had asked to be released from his vow of fealty in order to swear himself to the new king. Llewelyn had gladly released him to the service of one who was becoming a valued friend and ally.

With Olan's assistance, invitations were sent to the highest Lords. Egraine now served as Elanen's Master of Horse and keeper of the vast prairie land where the great war-horses were bred. Lingred, in Elanen's eastern domain, was given charge of the kingdom's vast orchards. Egret managed the sanctuary Trelaine established along his southern border, sustaining the existence of those species in danger of extinction. Egbert was responsible for the farmland that would provide grains and vegetables for the kingdom. All of these men, while important lords, also believed in things dear to Trelaine and Karandal.

Trelaine was pacing restlessly down one corridor of the castle when a page ran to him, informing him that Karandal's party had entered the gate of the walled fortress. Trelaine rushed to the castle steps, his heart beating in his chest, and watched as the standard bearing the gyrfalcon of Enworthy entered the courtyard. His beloved sat on a steed as white as new snow.

Karandal dismounted and strode quickly to the waiting King. He knelt and took Trelaine's right hand and kissed it. To those watching, it was a proper gesture. But Trelaine knew that it also an expression of love.

The feast was a great success. The Lords of Elanen greeted Karandal with sincere warmth. Karandal had large acres of orchards in his Dukedom which had been stricken by an unknown blight. Lord Lingred was familiar with the problem and offered to share a formula he had developed which was successful in destroying the blight with no harm to the delicate trees. Karandal enjoyed a long conversation with Egraine for he was quite fond of horses. Before circumstances led King Llewelyn to make him Duke of Enworthy, he had hoped his eldest brother, Tam, would let him assume the care and management of Enworthy's herds. From early youth, Karandal had been able to judge which of his father's horses would breed the best and he had vastly improved the herds.

As Chardel's youngest son, he could expect neither fortune nor future. That changed when his father and all of his brothers died in the war. The darkness that had twisted men's minds had also deceived his father. Karandal had watched helplessly as Chardel changed from a kind and peaceful man into a tyrant who ruled his land and family with distrust. When others plotted to overthrow King Llewelyn, Chardel joined them. Knowing it was wrong, Karandal still stood by him for the love he felt for his father. He had been at Chardel's right hand during the battle in which Chardel died by Llewelyn's sword. Llewelyn had been about to slay Karandal as well when Trelaine stopped him and begged the King's forgiveness for a son's loyalty to his father. It was the first time Karandal had ever seen Trelaine.

Chapter Six

When the feasting was finished, Trelaine rose and took Karandal's hand. A group of harpers had been playing softly in the background and Trelaine bid his guests stay and listen to them play and sing their tales of valor if they wished. Assured that the lords would be sufficiently entertained, he led Karandal from the massive dining hall to the apartments he had chosen as his, unaware that Miralen had used those same rooms.

Much later, their passion appeased, Trelaine and Karandel slept deeply in each other's arms. Some time toward the early dawn Trelaine woke screaming as if in fear for his life. Karandal had no idea what to do but to try and hold his love; calm whatever horror held him so strongly.

Olan, who slept in one of the smaller rooms, was also awakened by the screams and quickly entered the bedchamber. " `Tis all right, M'Lord," he said to Karandal. "The candles have all gone out, you see. His Majesty fears the dark. I'll just light new candles and the King will be aright again in no time."

Once the candles were lit and placed around the room, Trelaine began to relax. The darkness was gone and with it the fear conjured by hidden memories. Olan brought cups of hot tea laced with a little wine.

Assured that Trelaine had recovered, he bid the men a good night and left them alone. Karandal continued to worry but, as Trelaine relaxed against him, he sighed deeply and went back to sleep wondering what had provoked the nightmare.

Trelaine was standing by a window when Karandal woke the next morning. The Duke slipped on a simple woolen gown and joined the King. It was raining and droplets of water ran down the stained glass windowpane like miniature rivers.

"I do not know who I am," Trelaine said as Karandal came up behind him and enveloped him in strong arms. He leaned his head against the windowpane. "Look below, how the wind blows the leaves thither and yon through the courtyard. Sometimes I feel like one of those leaves. Nothing I have done since Menfred summoned me has been of my choosing. I have gone where the winds of chance have blown me. All save you, my love. That was one choice I made willingly and with my heart."

They held each other for several moments as Karandal tried to reassure Trelaine with soft words and gentle kisses. They were finally interrupted by a knock on the door and Olan entered, followed by servants with water for the bath and food for their morning meal.

Bathed and dressed, they sat at a small table by the fireplace and ate. Karandal was hungry and filled his plate but noticed that Trelaine only nibbled at pieces of fruit and cheese. He did not want to pry into things Trelaine might not want him to know, but the screams of the night before had come from his lover's soul. Reaching across the table, he took one of Trelaine's hands to offer what comfort he could.

Trelaine rose and went to sit beside the man who offered him love without knowing the darkness that haunted him. "Men say that I am one of the Qell Lords, and perhaps I am. I only know that Menfred brought me into this world with no knowledge of myself or others. Each day has been a new beginning."

Karandal rose and pulled a blanket from the bed to wrap around his shoulders. "You need not tell me these things, my love, unless you do so freely."

"You should know what manner of man I am. I cannot hold your heart to mine without your awareness of me. What I tell you I do willingly and hope that you wish to listen."

The room was filled with silence for a moment. When Karandal made no objection, Trelaine continued. "I know, in a way I do not understand, that the evil which caused so much hatred in recent years had its root in the Qell." He stopped and took a deep breath, a tear escaping the corner of one eye. "When the candles have all burned down at night and I am left in darkness, I see death all around me. I can feel, hear, and smell it. It leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. I am surrounded by death and it makes me wonder what I must have been ... what I have become."

To be continued

Comments to quasito_cat@hotmail.com

Next: Chapter 8: Dark Wishes II 7 9


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