Definition of Faggot = A pile of sticks. Next time someone calls someone that, reply with: "He isn't a faggot. Don't use words that you don't know their meanings. If anything, you are one part of a faggot. You're the blunt stick!"
Buzz. Buzz. Buzz.
"What the fuck is that," I thought. "Oh, that," Sam replied, groggily,"...is my alarm clock. I get up around 8.45 every morning, gives me enough time to do the usual before 9 when my day begins." "Wait, what?!"
I jumped up from the bed, hastily running to the bathroom. Ahh. Bladder cleared at full mast, I put off the fun time to get Sam up, I fucking forgot to mention his parents coming back early! ...He's still in bed, I need to get him up now!!
"WAKE UP. YOUR PARENTS ARE GONNA BE HERE IN 15 FUCKING MINUTES!!!!" I scream. "Uhhh," Was the brilliant reply I got.
It must not have registered with him, because I had to throw the covers off him and get him up. Too bad there wasn't any time for his problem.
"Sam, are you alright?" I ask concerned.
He still wasn't budging.
I had to get dressed anyway, his parents would be here any minute. I've only met Mr. and Mrs. Kent a couple of times, they were easily annoyed people. I think it's because his dad is a really good surgeon or something. Like, that's why his parents are out so much. His dad's so good he's flying all around the world to see patients. I think his wife's his secretary or something, which leaves Sam to fend for himself all the time. Anyway.
I'm all dressed now, at least I can make up some shit about coming to see him this morning for some 'quality' friend time. Right before I go back in to check on him, doorbell rings. Fuck.
I'm tied in between two things, check on Sam again, or get the bell. Fuck fuck fuck! His parents are really impatient people, but I can't just leave Sam! He hates random surprises like this! Orderly mess is what it is. I'm just gonna rush for the door and hope they don't immediately check in on Sam.
"Hi Mr. Kent." God this guy is kinda creepy. "Hello. Where is my son?" "I just came by this morning, I really just got here. I think he's still asleep." Shit I hate ab-libbing shit off the top of my head. "Yeah, that sounds like him. I'll just go check up on him." Mr Kent replies and then barges through the door.
Before I'm able to get to Sam's room first, his dad practically barges in to a half-naked Sam lying in bed, still, with what looks like foamy drool coming out of his mouth. Sam's dad then drops all his bags and runs to the bed, checking him over like the apparently great doctor he is. Meanwhile, Mrs. Kent is watching next to me, looking really distraught and trying to blame whatever's happening on me.
A few hours later, everybody has calmed down. Sam is fine, he had an allergic reaction to something, and his dad has taken care of him well. His dad's demanding answers, and I'm doing my best to dodge and steer clear of any drinking from last night. And of course any other events that happened yesterday.
After Sam properly woke up, he realised how heavy his head hurt and felt. He groggily walked around for a bit until going up to his parents and explaining all.
"What do you mean, you had too much to drink?" Mr. Kent angrily asked. "Well, I don't know really. I just had a couple and then I felt really bad."
Shortly after, Sams dad gave him the full check-through. That is, after my mum was called here by Mrs Kent to come and pick me up...
--Sams POV--
So what's dad going on about. I'm not allergic to anything. At least nothing I know of... wait on. Now I remember something. I better pipe up `cause I don't wanna get a full physical...
"Wait, I remember something!" "Well, what then." "I felt really out of it after a drink, couldn't have been the booze." I know how dad felt about the booze, but that was a discussion for later... "Oh no. Oh god no. Not this..." he trailed off. "What?!" What could be worse than him angry over me being a little tipsy? "Son, I don't know how to say this. I think you were drugged. You see, I'm allergic to cocaine... yes I found that out the hard way. Was a relief it happened in Med school, otherwise I wouldn't actually have my licence!" "Well that.....explains.....a lot..." I stutter out. "Yeah son, it sure does. Your friend Danny won't be able to come around for a while until it all clears your system, so drink heaps of water and you should be better in less than a week." Wow. I'm speechless. No anger? No wanting to know the kids name? It's like I can get away with murder now! Or, at least, he thinks I'm too tired after the coke... maybe I should take more? Hmm...
--Danny's POV--
"So, what happened yesterday?" Mum asked. "Well", I stutter, "stuff." "Care to elaborate?" No!!! I don't! But how I wish I could answer that way. "Ehh, well there was this party, and some stuff happened, and I don't really know about Sam. He had a drink, then I went to talk to you, and I came back and he was on the ground." By now I was clearly distraught, so thank fuck she dropped it.
I don't know what to do now. I mean, she knows that I feel for Sam. I really do. The way she said: "ok", seemed like she was reading into my soul. Fuck, do I tell her? I think I may have to. Otherwise she'd only claw it out of me later, or just look at my computer history. The second one makes me uncomfortably shudder, which she manages to pick up on.
Ok, calm, calm, calm. How do I approach this. She's kind of slow sometimes with big news. Maybe I can make it all elaborated and she won't know what I'm saying. No...no. Just come out with it? Why can't I just hide in my closet until she comes into my room, then BAM. Fuck, that would never go the way I would want to. Unless............
By the time we pulled up to the house, with the radio talk back softly in the background, I thought now was as good as ever. Set sail for fail! "Hey mum. Knock knock." "Umm, ok... who's there? "Your son Danny." "My son Danny who is..." --here goes nothing-- "Gay."
Boom.
--Sams POV--
Ok, I might just go to sleep then. If Danny isn't gonna come around for a while, I may as well get some sleep... Like get some sleep then ... may as well get some ... Can't really see why Danny's barred ... I mean, what is the point of that ... Dad seemed surprisingly cool ... under the circumstances ... and considering he's dad ... Gaydar ... Danny said he had gaydar ... LOL ... bit of a give-away though ... him catching me watching that porno ... wonder how he knew it was the guys I was interested in? ... dad took coke ... I wonder if he made that up to make me feel better ... wait a sec .. did I take coke? .... fuck, must remember if I did that ... I'll check with Danny ... fuck, not going to see Danny for like ages ... I don't get this ... dad is such a miserable sod ... usually ... I don't get it ... How could I have ... I mean I hardly even had anything to drink ... not really ... fuck's sake, so why did I have a drink in each hand .... that don't make sense ... but I did ... just before I passed out ... Danny! ... It was Danny's drink I had... Danny's and mine ... Huh, Danny ... shit, who'd have thought ... hehehehe .... tasted good too ... sweet and salty sort of ...
(At this point Sam started fondling his cock and began to drift happily off ... to dream-land)
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
He's eating a fucking banana. Danny is eating a fucking banana. It's not even ripe. It's fucking green and he's not peeled the skin back. But it's not going down, getting smaller ... he sticks it in his mouth like he's eating it but it isn't peeled back and he's not really eating it at all. Why's he standing in that white stuff? It's like ... no, it is ... it's snow. But it's warm and wet and fluffy ... hey! ... we're sledging! We're sledging down this snowy hillside ... except we don't have a sledge ... it's a log ... me and Danny, we are astride this chunk of tree and we are riding it down through the snow ... real fast ... like cool runners or something ... and we are heading straight for those trees ... it's this clump of trees ... sticking up out of the snow ... like Saxon's fucking pubic bush ... hehehe ... saw Saxon in the locker room that day ... hot ... he's got buttocks like paps ... Oh hell ... there's a man there ... he's got a mask ... a white mask and plastic gloves on his hands ... and he's got a bloody big knife ... It's a fucking chain saw! Shit! He's sawed the log in half and Danny is shooting off the wrong way ... away from me ... and now I'm scooting on my ass through the trees ... the snow is everywhere, tastes funny, like it's sweet and hot and salty ... only they're not trees any more ... it's a crowd of guys with no faces and they turn their backs on me ...
... I'm in a room ... there's a room on the other side of the trees ... and it's full of guys ... naked guys ... who turn and turn and turn like it's a merry-go-round. They are spinning round ... or maybe I am ...I feel really dizzy now ... real sick ...
They've all got plastic gloves on .. and they all got plastic cups ... full of booze ... must be booze because they are all laughing in a drunk sort of way ... and they are giving me plastic cups and making me drink them ... one after the other ... and I am swelling up ... I am like a balloon ... a big fat human balloon ....
I'm floating high up ... looking down on the round-about ... spinning ... faster ... faster ... faster .... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ (At this point Sam leans over the side of the bed and vomits.)
Aw, fuck, I feel like shit. Except, you know how, after you've thrown up, you actually feel better than you did before? Well, I still felt like shit but slightly better shit than I felt before. If that makes sense. Not that I'm making much sense, probably. Like that dream. Fuck, I wish I'd listened in that class. It was meant to be religion but Miss Craw wasn't there so we got this substitute who wasn't very hot on religious stuff and he did a lesson on Joseph that turned out to be a lesson about dreams. He told us about Freud. Freud had theories about dreams but I can't remember if they tell the future or the past?
Why did I dream about Saxon? I don't get that. Like why? Shit, I just fell in love. Lie. I been in love with Danny for like ages and ages. It's just that I tried not to think about it. Hehehe. Think about it! Danny is gay too! Fucking magic! Too right too. FUCKING magic. Imagine sinking my nine-incher into ... ok, ok, slight exaggeration ... his tight boyhole. (Hey, only SLIGHT mind you, mate!) I'll go in slow. Sink it in, drill it in slow like I'm drilling for oil. Feel him squeeze around me, clamping his bum muscles round my meat. Fuck, it'll be like his ass is trying to wank me off. How'll I know if I hit the spot? Maybe he'll squirm or shout out. Bet he screams out. "Oh, fuck, Sam! You hit the spot!" !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Shit! I just cummed there. Yucky fuck. What the hell? Bet you can tell old sick from crusty old cum. If she asks I'll just tell mum that I threw up. Which will be true. Don't need to explain that my dick threw up as well.
(Sam snuggles down under the cum-crusty doona and, clutching his detumescing cock, he smiles to himself as he drifts off back to sleepyland.)
ZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
--Danny's POV--
Imagine, if you will, a million, billion, tiny pieces of glittery magic, having spontaneously combusted from a single fragment in the space-time continuum. Yeah, that's me right now.
My mum was just speechless. Still looking at me. A few are you sure's, and a couple of really's' and I repeatedly told her of my answers. Yes, mum, I'm sure. I've known for years... fuck!
"Got any crushes?" "Even if I did, you'd be the last to know." "Well, I really don't know. I'm going to need to figure this all out... Tell your father, tonight."
Oh fuck.
- The only reason I brought a doctor into this is because of my love for the show House. Long live that egotistical maniac that's on every week! Oh, and by the way, this chapter is a little touchy. There is one bit that is purely true. Whenever your reading this, I'm writing it on October 11th, known as National Coming Out Day. Some day we won't have to come out. Some day straight people will be the ones that will think they don't fit in. LOL jokes, some day we will all get along. Anyway, as part of NCOD and with myself having been a part of it before, in the true scene, I wish everyone who, if they haven't yet, the best of luck coming out. My suggestion? Say it in the form of a knock-knock joke.
Knock knock? Who's there? Your son X Your son X who... ...is gay.
Simple. xD *