DANCING ON THE TUNDRA by Bert McKenzie Copyright 2010
Disclaimer: This story is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to any real person alive or dead is coincidental and unintentional.
CHAPTER XXIII
The days flew by swiftly. The three friends saw all the sights and attended all the tourist attractions in the area, most of which Terry had never seen himself. Of course he had to wear sunglasses and a dark rinse on his hair to be able to enjoy the experience with his friends. And every night there was incredible love making with Dan. But what Terry found even more fulfilling was the bonding with another person. It was wonderful to fall asleep in his lover's arms after they had climaxed together, and to wake up the next morning in the same way. Every other lover had always seemed interested in sex, but became preoccupied once the physical joining was complete. They all had other lives to return to, lives that did not include him. Dan was the only man he had ever known who seemed content to be a part of his life, to merge the two lives together into a unified whole rather than cut him out once love making was over. When Terry closed his eyes and examined his spirit, he saw the tundra retreating just a tiny bit. It still surrounded him, but now there was room under the white blanket for two people to cling to each other and provide mutual warmth.
But at last their idyllic vacation had to come to an end. Pete called early one morning with a costume drama that was being filmed in Europe. He needed an answer right away and wanted Terry to read the script, then meet with him to discuss contract negotiations. He also had a mountain of paperwork that they needed to wade through. "But I'm on vacation," Terry protested. "I have some old friends here from Dallas and I really don't want to desert them just to do paperwork." But Pete was insistent and said he was on his way over to discuss the matter. He was calling from his car. Terry hung up the phone, angry and depressed.
"Hey, it's just like summer vacation when we were kids," Paula said as the three sat on the terrace beside the pool. "Eventually summer was over and we had to go back to school. I guess what I'm trying to say is, we've got to be heading home. It's a long drive and both of us have to be back to work on Monday."
Panic set in. The thought of Paula returning to Dallas was saddening, but the thought of losing Dan gripped Terry by the throat. He quickly stood up and went inside so they wouldn't see the tears he could feel building. Paula looked at Dan for a moment, then moved her head indicating that he should follow Terry.
Dan found his lover in the den. "Hi," he said softly as he sat on the edge of the antique wooden banker's desk. Terry acknowledged him with a slight wave of the hand. "I take it you're upset that our vacation was so short."
Terry forced down the fear and concentrated on his words, using all his acting skills as well as the tundra inside to mask his anguish. "Why do you have to go?"
"I have a job. If I don't return I'll be fired."
"Dan, I love you," Terry said as he looked up at the man, tears glinting in his eyes. "I never said it when we were in college and I lost you. Now you've walked back into my life and made it wonderful. I don't want to lose you again."
Dan stood up and walked to the glass doors that overlooked the ocean. "I love you too, Terry. I've always loved you, ever since that first night when you helped put on my makeup, then you went drinking with me and took me home with you nineteen years ago. But you're a big star and I'm just an office worker from Texas. I can't stay here now any more than I could back then. I can't be a kept man."
Terry walked up behind the man he loved and put his arms around him. "But you said you're a writer. You sold two books. Why can't you stay here and write?"
Dan placed his hands over Terry's. "I'd love that, but I'm afraid I'd feel too useless."
"You and your damned pride," Terry growled.
"What's going on here?" a male voice asked and the lovers both jumped. Terry quickly turned to see his manager standing in the doorway.
"Pete, this is my friend Dan," he said as he returned to his desk. Dan crossed the room to shake hands with the young executive.
Pete shook his hand and then abruptly ignored him, turning to Terry, all business. "Sylvia's sick and we'll need someone to take notes, do the typing and maybe take some dictation. I'll call a temp service. They ought to have a secretary out here in about an hour. Meanwhile . . ." He dropped onto the couch and grabbed the phone, punching numbers in the key pad.
"I'll go get packed," Dan said as he turned to leave.
"No wait," Terry answered as an idea began to form in his mind. "Forget the call, Pete. Dan can help us out." Pete paused in mid-dial to stare at Terry. "He's a secretary back in Dallas."
"Can you type?" Pete asked.
"Seventy-five words a minute."
"Good enough," Terry said with a smile. "I know this is awfully stereotyped, but while Pete's getting the paperwork set up, would you mind getting us some coffee?" Dan gave him an oddly suspicious look.
Once the man was out of the room Pete wheeled on Terry. "Don't think I don't know what's going on here. You and that big guy are getting it on, aren't you?"
"Pete, my sex life is none of your business. And besides, you've been after me to hire my own secretary and quit bothering yours. Okay, I just did."
"Him? No way! I absolutely refuse!"
"Why? And I don't see how you've got a right to tell me who to hire, or who not to sleep with for that matter." Just then Dan returned with two steaming cups. "Dan, Pete's been after me to hire a personal secretary for about a year now. Would you be interested in the job?"
Dan looked uncomfortable. "I don't think that would be a good idea," he said.
"There, you see? Your friend agrees with me."
"Well I don't know if I'd say that," Dan countered, taking an instant dislike to the manager.
"So, you'll do it?" Terry asked.
"Wait a minute. Hold everything," Pete said, jumping to his feet. "This is crazy. I said you needed a secretary, some woman who'll take care of your schedule and correspondence. You need someone who'll work her tail off for you, not some muscle bound, macho dude to follow you around, sponge off you and ruin your career by adding to those rumors that you're gay."
"I am gay," Terry said, but his words were unheard as Dan crossed the room and grabbed Pete by the front of the shirt, lifting him off the floor.
"Now you listen to me, you little shit. Who says a secretary has to be a woman? I'm a better secretary in my office back home than two thirds of those lazy cunts. If I take this job I will work my tail off for him. I don't sponge off of anyone and I don't take shit off of anyone, especially little pencil pushing geeks like you. And as to ruining his career, I'd say that's your job, not mine." Dan dropped the man back on the couch. He then turned to Terry. "So am I hired?"
Terry smiled his most photogenic smile. "I'd say so."
Dan grabbed a pad and pencil, stationed himself in a chair, then looked expectantly at Pete. The man took a moment to recover, shooting both Terry and Dan angry looks. He then opened his brief case and began going over the deal for the film.
Terry and Dan said farewell to Paula the next morning. They were both concerned about her driving back to Texas all by herself, but she insisted that she would be fine. Dan had called his supervisor and then FAXed his resignation. Paula had agreed to send his things and take care of contacting his landlord. He was still unsure about his decision, but he agreed to give it a try. He could continue to write, live as Terry's lover, and earn his keep by working as Terry's secretary/personal assistant/bodyguard, keeping track of all the paperwork, scheduling and so on.
Pete was still unhappy about the situation. He didn't like Dan, partly because of the physical conflict they had, and partly because of what he thought Dan represented. On the surface he knew that Dan and Terry had become lovers and he feared that the rumors which had circulated in the underground ever since Terry found the dead body of Wesley Strothers in his house might finally surface. He was terrified of the general public finding out about Terry's sexual orientation. He was certain this would kill any box office draw and would mean the end of a most promisingly lucrative career. But another reason why the manager resented Dan was because of what he thought the man might do to Terry. The actor finally had the balls to put his foot down and go against Pete's wishes. Pete feared that this new relationship might cause Terry to be less dependent upon his manager either because he would develop a new independence because of his recent assertions of authority, or worse, he might transfer his dependency to Dan. Pete feared this the most. The big man was strong and charismatic, but he was naive and would certainly lead Terry into ruin. And despite what others might say, Pete cared for Terry, and he cared deeply for Terry's money, which in a way he considered his own.
"You're all packed," Dan said as Terry walked into the bedroom.
"And what about you?" Terry asked.
"I did me first."
"I wish we were taking a slow train, a nice romantic sleeper car for two." Terry reached out and hugged his lover.
"In the first place we'd be a little soggy. They haven't built a railroad bridge over the Atlantic Ocean. And secondly, we'd have to have separate compartments. I promised Pete we'd be good and I would see that you act like the perfect heterosexual actor."
"And how are you going to manage that?" Terry asked.
"I don't know yet, but I thought I might start by lining you up some dates with the girls in the cast."
"No thanks!" Terry said as he punched Dan in the arm. They were interrupted in mid kiss by the doorbell. The car was waiting to take them to the airport.
The European settings were breathtaking and Dan had to smile in secret delight as he watched the dashingly handsome blond galloping across the countryside on his white charger, dressed in the roguish leather jerkin of the defender of the peasants. Dan knew that once the day's filming came to an end, that handsome man would peel off his costume and surrender his beautiful, naked body to his secretary and companion. They had adjoining rooms at the hotel and once the two had retired for the night the connecting door opened and they climbed into the same bed. However, during the day they were no more than business associates and good friends. Dan was bothered by this duplicity, but he didn't really have much time to dwell on it, being kept busy with the business end of Terry's career.
There was one very uncomfortable moment when Terry was interviewed by "Entertainment Tonight." The interviewer remarked that she could see a new spark of life in Terry, who in the past always avoided interviews, coming off rather staid and unemotional. He admitted that it was due to changes in his personal life. Was there a romantic involvement? Yes, definitely. But he refused to say any more. Dan received a call two days later from Pete who had heard about the interview and was now furious. "I asked you to keep him out of this kind of trouble," the manager reprimanded.
"Hello, hello. Pete are you there?" Dan said loudly in the receiver. He then banged it on the table and clicked the switch hook a couple of times. "I can't hear you. We must have a bad overseas connection." He then hung up the phone as the manager continued to yell.
The filming was almost complete when one day a messenger handed Dan a cable gram for Terry. As soon as the crew took a break to line up some insertion shots Dan hurried to Terry with the telegram. "What is it?" Terry asked.
"I don't know," Dan replied. "It's from Springfield so I thought it might be personal."
Terry tore open the envelope and read the contents, then burst out laughing. "It's from Mom," he said, handing the paper to his secretary. "She says my high school graduating class is having our twenty year reunion and they have been pestering her to get me to come."
"Great," Dan replied. "I'll check your calendar and schedule it."
"No thanks. I've no interest in that."
"But Terry, it might be fun. You know, the home town hero and all that."
"No, I just want to get this show over with and go home. I've never been so saddle sore in my life."
"Well I guess you'll have to give up all that riding at night," Dan commented with a lecherous grin.
"Not a chance," Terry replied, reaching for his lover's crotch.
"You like riding at night?" One of the female cast members asked as she overheard the conversation. "Me too. Maybe we can go out tonight together. There's a full moon."
"Gee, I'd love to," Terry said with a winning smile, "but I'd better listen to my assistant and get some rest for a change."
The next day Dan intercepted a phone call for Terry. It was from Paula. She called to beg him to come to the class reunion. She planned to go, but didn't want to if he wouldn't be there. "Come on, Dan. Convince him. It'll be fun to go back home as a big Hollywood star. It'll be his chance to let them all see how far he came from the little kid they all used to push around. It would really be great for his ego."
"Well, I'll try, but don't count on it." Dan hung up and immediately called Pete in L.A. He explained the situation, expecting to get a resounding no. But surprisingly Pete was all for it. It would make great headlines. "Home Town Boy Makes It Big." "Movie Star Returns to His Roots." Dan finally agreed to try to convince Terry.
That evening Dan brought up the reunion. "No," Terry said firmly. "You don't know what it was like. I hated high school. I was picked on and bullied. I was abused. I have no desire to go back and party with those jerks who made me feel so bad through my adolescence."
"But Terry, this will be your chance to show them up. You're a star. You've got the life most of them only dream about."
"So I should go back for some sort of twisted revenge?" Terry asked. "I should go just to make them all envious?"
Dan realized how selfish and cruel this motivation sounded. He had to agree with his lover that it was a bad reason to make the trip. "No," he said at last. "I think you should go back to close the book on that chapter of your life. By showing the kids who were mean to you that you turned out okay, it will stamp an end on that unfinished emotional business. By going back as a friend and fellow classmate, it will put you on equal footing with them as adults. You'll all realize how foolish you were as kids and you'll all be able to cleanse the old wounds, bury the dead emotions and go on."
Terry sighed as he lay back on the bed. "What were you doing working as a secretary? You should be a psychologist."
"So we're going?"
"We?"
"You don't think I'd let you face this alone, do you?"
"Okay, check the schedule and make the arrangements."
Dan had to work extra hard to keep things on a low key. The mayor wanted to have a parade in Terry's honor, but that was quickly stopped. In return Dan scheduled two appearances on a talk show on the local TV station. Pete was unhappy about the low profile on which Terry insisted. He would have been happy with a parade, or even bigger fanfare if it could be arranged. But Dan insisted that if they were going to the reunion, they would do it on Terry's terms, or not at all.
When they drove up and walked to the front door of his house, Terry was suddenly assaulted by photographers who jumped out of the bushes. Dan was prepared to chase them away, but he didn't have a chance. Terry's mother rushed out the front door, screaming at the top of her lungs and brandishing a broom. She chased the men out of her flower beds, delivering several well placed blows and demolishing at least one camera in the process. "Maybe they ought to make a movie star out of her," Dan whispered as he saw Terry's mother fly after the men. "She's almost as good as you in a fight scene."
"Yeah, but just remember that in my fights it's always actors who let me win."
Terry introduced Dan to his mother and they went inside to the meal she had prepared for the two of them. After dinner they sat in the living room and told her stories of Terry's life in California. He had only been home twice since his father died, and although he had repeatedly tried to get his mother to come to the west coast, she refused to leave the home she had known for nearly seventy years. Around eight o'clock that evening the phone rang. It was Paula who had just arrived in town. She wanted to make sure Terry and Dan had come in for the reunion.
The next day was taken up with the taping of the TV appearances and an interview with a newspaper reporter and a radio DJ. That evening a car horn honked out in front of the house just as Terry was about ready to leave. Paula had planned to drive them and he figured she was letting him know she was ready to go. "I wish you'd reconsider and let me go along," Dan said. "After all, you may need some help fighting off all these star-struck fans you went to high school with."
"No, it's okay," Terry replied, checking himself out in the hall mirror and adjusting his tie. "We'll go, stay for a couple of dances and then come home."
"I'll wait up."
"You better," Terry said as he leaned over to kiss his lover.
As they pulled apart, Terry suddenly realized his mom had just entered from the living room and was looking at them in stunned surprise. "Um, it's Jimmy Ragsdale," she said when she found her voice. "He says he wants to take you to the dance."
As Terry walked out on the front porch he saw his old high school classmate for the first time in twenty years. Time had been kind to Jim. He had matured into a handsome man of 38 with just a hint of grey coloring his temples. He carried a little more weight around the middle than he should, but he still had the same infectious smile. "Hey, Terry," he said. "Let's go. Paula's waiting in the truck. I thought I'd take you two, just like old times, hunh?" Terry smiled and nodded and they walked down the front steps to where a new, shiny, black Chevy 4 x 4 sat waiting at the curb. Paula opened the door and Terry slipped in. On the way to the dance Jim kept repeating how 'cool' it was that the three of them were going together. Terry had an uncomfortable feeling in the pit of his stomach because of old memories that fought their way to the surface of his consciousness, but he just kept focusing on the tundra inside and they retreated to a safe distance.
At the dance everyone was given a name tag as they entered the doors, everyone except Terry. At one end of the gym a big sign was hung that said "Welcome Class of '70." But at the other end another sign read "Welcome Home Terry Michaels." Once inside he was instantly surrounded by many of his old classmates who never would have spoken to him twenty years earlier. Jim took Paula off to dance and Terry was escorted to a large table where several of the old high school faculty sat. Father Joseph seemed particularly proud of his former student and insisted on having his picture taken several times with his arm around Terry.
Although he was never left totally alone, gradually the novelty began to wear off and the reunion took on a more normal flavor and became less of a tribute to a home town hero. "Hey, how's it going, Tutti?" a harsh voice called out. Terry turned to see Mike Myers and Bart Smith leaning against each other and laughing. Bart looked much the same only older, but Mike had changed drastically. He was now bald and sported a large beer gut. It was pretty obvious that they had been drinking.
"Be careful, Mike," Smith said with a laugh. "He's a lot tougher now than he was in high school. Did you see him kick those dudes' asses in 'Baja Connection'?"
"It's okay," Myers replied as he came up and dropped a heavy paw on Terry's shoulder. "He doesn't have his stunt man with him tonight. He won't make any trouble. We might mess up his pretty face."
"Terry, come dance with me," Paula said as she grabbed her friend, pulling him onto the basketball court. "What are those two goons up to?" she asked.
"Just the usual," Terry replied. "Harassing women and children."
"Well, just remember, you aren't either one anymore. You don't have to take their shit."
When the number ended, Paula kept her arm linked to Terry. They wandered back over toward the tables and chairs, but she noticed Myers and Smith heading their way so she changed directions, pulling her friend along to the faculty table. "Hi, Sister," she said to an aging nun who seemed a little bored with the festivities. "You remember Terry Michaelson."
Sister Mary Leon instantly perked up. "Oh, Terry Michaels, come sit down." Once he was seated she began pumping him with questions. "Is Arnold Schwarzenegger as nice as they say? What's Tom Selleck really like? He's so cute. Have you ever met Rutger Hauer?" Meanwhile Paula made a mad dash to the pay phones in the hallway.
Terry finally managed to slip away from the old nun. But as soon as he did Paula and Jim showed up and began following him like shadows. "So what do you think of the old place?" Jim asked.
"It's all just about the same as I remember it," Terry replied.
"Only they now have a computer lab in the room where Sister Patrick Marie used to teach Latin."
"Say, where's Ben?" Terry asked as he looked around. "I haven't seen him here tonight."
"Benny's dead," Jim said tensely.
"Yeah, he got AIDS. Served the little fruit right," a voice behind them spoke up. It was Mike Myers again. "Yeah, he was a faggot. But then I guess you knew that. Is that why you two girls were such good friends?"
"Hey," Bart chimed in. "You remember when we all porked Tutti's ass after the prom? Jesus, when this AIDS thing first came out I was scared I was gonna die because of that night."
"Yeah," Myers returned. "I hope all the faggots die off soon. It'll save us decent folk the trouble of goin' out huntin' 'em down and shootin' 'em."
Paula grabbed Terry's arm in a tight clinch, her strong fingers digging into his muscles. "Just let it go," she said quietly. "They're just trying to provoke you."
"What about you, Rags?" Mike asked. "You used to let Tutti swing on your bone about every week. You ever get tested for AIDS?"
Jim turned around and swung, but Mike was ready for him, dodging the blow and delivering a punch in the nose. Before Terry could react, a number of other people intervened, separating the fighters and rushing Mike and Bart out the side door as Jim made his way to the men's room. "I'm going to go check on him," Terry said and pulled free of Paula's grasp, heading out of the gym and down the hall.
In the restroom Jim was wiping off the blood as Terry entered. "You okay?" he asked.
"I'll live," Jim replied. "Man, sorry you had to see that. Those guys were jerks back then and they never changed."
"It's okay."
"And I'm . . . I'm sorry for all the shit I caused you back in school," Jim continued. "I mean, I was just a stupid kid. I shouldn't have made you . . . you know."
"Forget it. I have," Terry said.
"Okay," Jim agreed holding out his hand. Terry grabbed it and they shook.
"Oh, ain't that touching?" a voice said from the doorway. Terry turned to see Myers and Smith coming in. "If we waited another couple of minutes we could have seen the big movie star on his knees, sucking cock like in the old days."
"I thought they threw you out of here," Jim said.
"Well we came back," Bart replied with a smile.
"Don't you boys think you ought to take this outside?" a voice said from behind the two trouble makers.
"Who the hell are you?" Myers asked as he turned to the newcomer, a big, muscular looking stranger.
"I'm Mr. Michaels' secretary," Dan replied.
"His secretary?" Smith said with a whoop. "I bet you like to sit on his lap too."
"As a matter of fact, I do," Dan answered, the fire building in his eyes.
"Dan, I can fight my own battles now," Terry said, his voice cutting the tense air like a knife.
"If your bodyguard here doesn't help you out, you're in big trouble," Myers retorted. "There ain't no stunt double in here." He suddenly rushed Terry.
The blond ducked down, catching Myers in the gut and flipping him over onto his back on the hard tiles. He next leaped into the air, landing a flying kick into Smith's face as the man also rushed forward. Smith went crashing into one of the stalls, not to be heard from again. But Mike Myers was back on his feet, coming up behind Terry. Just as he was about to connect, Terry gracefully sidestepped him, shooting an elbow out and into his stomach, then snapping his forearm up so Myers caught Terry's fist in his face as he was hunching forward. He tottered for a moment, then collapsed over backwards. Terry looked at Jim who was staring open mouthed at the display, shrugged his shoulders and said, "I don't use a stunt double." He then reached out and hugged Dan, kissing his lover firmly on the mouth. They were oblivious to the gasps coming from several onlookers crowded into the men's room doorway.