It was dark to be sure. But it was also quiet. A calm had settled on the community and only occasional sounds of barking or trucks whizzing by on the nearby highway interupted.
He sighed and walked. The night air was cold...but refreshing after he had spent twelve hours working and working hard.
His shoulders ached, his lower back too throbbed and his legs were just plain tired.
"Want a ride?" the others asked but he said no.
He wanted to get away from them, their laughter, their jokes, their noise.
All day long his ears had been assaulted by the shrill paging system at work which somehow surmounted the roar of engines, the clatter of ladders, the ringing of cash registers and the general noise of the public.
The warehouse wasn't where wanted to be....but it was a job. They continued to pay overtime and offer long hours and at that time, earning as much money as possible was his goal.
College would start in the fall...and he had decided to get his own apartment when he returned. No more dorms or horny roommates or red necked partygoers.
He could handle it ... he had handled it all his life thus far even as far back as his first time.
Clancy and he had jacked off together and one night kissed. Clancy was nervous not knowing how he would respond. He didn't respond except to let the kiss happen.
Clancy tried to apologize but he just smiled and said "we're friends" letting it go at that. They never messed around together after that. It wasn't him, it was Clancy, probably afraid he was "turning queer" as the saying goes.
He chuckled as he walked down the wet pavement past the closed stores.
Clancy was cute and he would have loved to do more then kiss him. But for some reason he didn't feel like being the agressor.
It was Ponce who he did do more with. A kid down the street who hung around him, Clancy and the others for years. And it was Ponce who stood totally naked in his basement one day asking him if he liked what he saw.
He moved closer, held the boys penis and let it grow hard..admiring it, fondlign it, bending over and kissing it..the licking and eventually sucking it. Ponce was surprised "I thought I was the only one" he said. They had sex..full all out sex..oral and anal....things he hadn't done before he somehow knew how.
"Clancy what you missed out on" he muttered and laughed at his comments for it was he too, who regretted not exploring his feelings for Clancy. But that friend was in the Navy, hundreds of miles away.
And he had gone on to explore his sexuality with not only Ponce but a few others over the years.
Freshman year in college had been frustrating until he found the places to go where others like him went. But despite the occasional release of his emotional and sexual needs, he had been confined to the dorm..and all the bravado that goes with it.
That night, it was quiet...and as he walked slowly towards the part of town where he lived with his parents..his muscles and entire body began to relax.
If he could have curled up to sleep anywhere along the road, he would have. He had a long way to go and knew he could get there, if he took his time.
Clattering got his attention as he walked past the closed bowling alley. It was there he went on weekends as a kid..there he worked one summer in high school and there he and Ponce did it in the basement one daring night.
"Hey" the voice was deep and friendly. A figure was closing up the dumpster and locking it.
He couldn't recognize the person, but waved and walked on. A scurry of feet told him the figure was running after him.
They walked together, he and the old high school acquaintence. They had never been friends but knew of each other during those years. So they talked of former teachers, colleges and their current jobs. Like him, the other one was collecting money....he had to get out of the dorm life.
It was like a mirror hearing the same complaints and frustrations being shared with him.
"You gay too?" the question came suddenly, calmly and quite naturally.
To his surprise he said "yea" and they walked on expanding their talk to experiences, frightening events and secret rendevous. He didn't care the other boy went to college across country.
"Want to do something before we go home?"
He didn't answer but turned and followed the boy into the alley..even darker then the street on which they had been walking.
The kiss was wet, strong, needy and passionate. Their hands unbuttoned, felt, teased, pinched, fondled and poked each other. Their clothing wasn't off, but opened, making themselves available to each other. And soon, too soon, their need subsided and they laughed at each other...occasionally petting, kissing as they dressed.
"Good luck to you" he said.
"Maybe I'll see you again" the other one offered and he didn't respond. It was too close to home somehow.
The other one walked away....it was sad but what he needed to be alone for the rest of the walk.
There were miles to walk before he could rest...and if he walked at a liesure pace, he'd get to wherever he was going...in good time.