Even after talking to Patrick about the money issue, I still felt weird about what had happened. I wanted to talk to someone about it, but Norman was my only real friend and I wasn't sure what I could tell him. He didn't know that Derek had paid me for our dates so he wouldn't understand why Patrick thought I was a callboy. Actually, I hadn't told Norman much about Derek, except that he was older than a guy I would normally date and that it wasn't a serious relationship, and then I'd left it at that.
When I got to Norman's house Monday afternoon I solved the dilemma by going right to the computer to type my paper. Norman had a beef stew going in the crock pot and he kept busy in the kitchen while I worked. When we finally sat down to eat it was easy to talk about school.
"I don't know how they expect you to complete two years of high school in sixteen weeks."
"I don't think it's meant to be quite like that. Some of the students in the class haven't had any kind of high school and some are only a year short. In our English class, Ms. Garber spends half the time on grammar and composition and the rest on discussions about what we're reading, which has been mostly short stories, so far. And in history it's more of an overview. Mr. Cutter is focusing more on the ideas behind what happened rather than specific events and dates."
"And I always thought two years with classes every day was an overview." Norman shook his head. "From what we've gone over he seems to be hitting the important stuff, though."
"We've already covered the colonial period and the revolution. Now we're spending quite a bit of time on the formation of the federal government and the constitution."
"It sounds more like a course to get immigrants ready for the citizenship test." He sighed. "Considering how little of what is taught in high school stays with most people I suppose it's not so bad."
"Yeah, and don't forget we're doing tons of reading, too. It's mostly an independent study course and the classes are there to answer questions and stress the important stuff."
"You do seem to be taking it seriously. I'm glad Isabel was able to get you into the course."
"So am I. In four months I'll be a high school graduate, more or less. I was beginning to think that wasn't going to happen." An idea that had been rolling around in my head for a couple of weeks occurred to me. "You volunteer every week at the homeless shelter, don't you?"
"That's right, every Tuesday morning. Why?"
"Well, I was thinking. Even with my workouts and my classes and reading, I still have a lot of time on my hands. In warmer weather I spent a lot of time walking around the city or the park, but at this time of year that's not very pleasant. I really enjoyed helping out at the shelter on the holidays and I was wondering if they could use me for something maybe half a day a week."
"They can always use help, but are you sure, Jerry? I don't want to see you take on too much."
"It wouldn't be too much. Every morning I work out for an hour and then study for two. I'm done by lunchtime. I've only got classes Tuesday and Thursday so that means I have three free afternoons. And I only work two evenings during the week and one on the weekend so even if I volunteer once a week I'll still have lots of time to myself."
"If they put you on the schedule you'd be making a commitment, you know. They'd be counting on you being there."
"Yeah, I know that. I really liked helping out there. It made me feel good about myself to help others. I'm not just bored. I really do want to help."
"Okay, I'll talk to the shelter director in the morning."
I helped Norman clear the table and loaded the dishwasher while he put away the leftovers. Then he poured himself another glass of wine and a soda for me and we went into the den and got comfortable.
"And now that you've talked about everything else in your life, Jerry, tell me about your big date Saturday night. I've been dying to hear about it all evening. Spill it."
"It was pretty good. Patrick's a nice guy and we had fun." I told him about dinner and the club. "I spent the night with him even though I hadn't planned on it. He was really good in bed but I'm not going to get into the details of that."
"I wouldn't want you to. That's too personal. I just wanted to know if you had a good time and what kind of young man he was."
"Yeah, I did have a good time and as I said, he seems nice. He's a lawyer."
"A lawyer? How old is this guy? I thought he was close to your age."
"He's twenty-five, although he doesn't look that old. I liked him a lot." As I said that last bit my mind wandered to the whole money issue and I know it probably didn't come out like I meant it.
"You don't sound very sure of that. Is something bothering you?"
"No, not really. It was good, it's just ... I don't know, two people who don't know each other go into a first date like that with different expectations and then you spend a lot of time trying to figure each other out. It can be a little awkward."
"Of course. It takes time to get to know one another. That's natural."
"Yeah, I guess. I was trying not to expect too much and I did enjoy myself, but I didn't feel any magic. You know, that feeling of 'this is the one'."
"You're still looking for love at first sight, Jerry. I don't know if that happens or not, but don't give up right away if it doesn't. Sometimes love grows between two people and it takes a while. You have to at least give it a chance."
"I know, I am. We're seeing each other again on Friday. I guess I'm just disappointed because it didn't feel like that first time I met Marcus, or the second time either for that matter."
"You wouldn't want it to be the same with everyone you go out with. That's what makes each experience interesting."
"Well, Patrick certainly was an interesting experience."
Friday night I took the train back to Philly. This time I planned on spending the night so I brought my knapsack with a clean shirt and underwear and toiletries. Now that I knew where Patrick lived I went straight there. Of course, that meant dinner was delayed by a couple of hours, since as soon as I was in the door we began ripping our clothes off. I may not have felt anything magical toward him, but his body turned me on something fierce. And he seemed to be just as hot for my body.
We didn't even make it into the bedroom. We were making out all the time we were stripping. Once we were naked we dropped to the floor in the living room and almost immediately were in a sixty-nine position, licking and sucking each other's hard tools. After a minute of that I let my tongue work on his balls a bit. He was lying on his back and I was on top of him. I spread his legs apart and worked my head between them, licking him behind the balls, working my way back to his hot little pucker. I hooked my arms through his legs, pulling them back, lifting his ass into my face. I licked around his hairless anus for a minute and then began to work my tongue into him. He pulled my butt backwards until I was practically sitting on his mouth. He spread my cheeks and went to work on my hole.
In no time we were both breathing heavy, gasping as we were rimming. Our dicks were each rubbing on the other's chest, slipping in the precum that was oozing from them. Even with no other contact on my dick I knew I wasn't going to hold out long. Patrick's tongue felt as if it were several inches inside me and was driving me wild. I gave up on his hole, lowered his legs and took his rod in my mouth again, downing it in one gulp. He let go of my cheeks and took my cock between his lips. Instinctively I began fucking his mouth, being careful not to push too hard. He hadn't been able to deep throat me the week before and I didn't want to force him. I gave his balls a squeeze as they pulled up in my hand and he started shooting his load in my mouth. As that same instant I broke through the back of his throat and my dick slid all the way into him. I lost it and erupted, sending my cum shooting toward his belly. When both of our orgasms had subsided, I rolled off him and scooted around so we were cuddling. I kissed him and he returned it passionately.
"Damn, that was fun, Coy. I didn't plan that, it just happened."
"Yeah, sometime it's good not to anticipate. But don't forget, you owe me. Later on you're going to top me to pay me back for last week."
"Well, if you insist," he grinned.
Once again we went to Cosi for dinner and then to the club. This time there was no talk of hustling. It was a much more comfortable night than the first date because we knew each other a little and we weren't fantasizing as much. We had some reality to go on and that was good enough. This time we spent a little while on the second floor watching the dancers. I stood in front of him and he held me tight, his arms around my chest. He kept thrusting his hips forward into my butt. He may have said he was a total bottom but I could feel his hardon pressing into my ass. I was looking forward to having him bury that bone in me when we got back to the apartment.
When we left it was freezing out so we took a cab back. That suited me fine because I was in a hurry. Yeah, we'd just cum a couple of hours earlier, but hey, I'm a teenager. He kept tickling my dick with his fingertips all the way back, just out of sight of the cabdriver. I was totally hard by the time we got to his place. Just inside the door he stopped short in front of me and stuck his ass out toward me. I pulled his hips back toward mine and humped his butt through our clothes. That was all it took to drive us both into a frenzy. Once again we stripped off our clothes in the living room. This time we didn't sink to the floor. I don't know what came over me but I bent him over the arm of a chair, sank to my knees behind him and dove into his ass, face first. After working my tongue up inside that tight hole I just knew I had to get more of me in there.
I got up and picked up my knapsack from where I'd dropped it when I first arrived. I fumbled through it until I found a condom and a tube of lube. I sheathed my huge dick and squirted some lube on it, then worked some into his already loosened pucker. I rubbed my head around his hole a few times until he bucked back.
"Enough of the teasing. Fuck me, damn it!"
And fuck him I did. I plowed his ass good and hard, ramming into him as far as I could go. I reached for his shoulders and pulled him back onto me with every thrust. What we were doing was definitely not making love. It was fucking, pure and simple. And rough. We were both panting and sweating. Patrick reached under himself and grabbed his dick and began stroking it. I could feel him tense up and then his sphincter grabbed my rod, squeezing it hard as he exploded. As he shot it seemed like his ass muscles were milking me. I gave one final powerful thrust, burying myself deep within him and shot, six, seven times, filling the condom with my juice. He collapsed onto the chair and I collapsed onto his back. We stayed like that for a while, a sweaty sticky mess, trying to catch our breath. I finally got the strength to stand up. I pulled back and let my dick slip from his hole. He stood and turned toward me.
"You are an incredible fuck. I don't know if it's the size of your pecker or the way you use it, but I can't get enough of that." He kissed me softly.
"I loved every minute of that, too, but wasn't it supposed to be the other way around this time?"
"Nag, nag, nag. Yeah, you're right, but somehow this just seemed more natural. Maybe in the morning, if you haven't worn me out completely by then."
In the morning I finally nailed him or maybe I should say I made him nail me. I woke up spooning him, just as I had the week before. It felt good, but I wasn't going to let him get away with bottoming one more time. I reached around him and groped his dick. It was nearly hard and finished plumping up as soon as I touched it. He again handed me the lube and a condom over his shoulder, probably thinking I'd take him from behind again. Instead I rolled him over onto his back and fitted the condom onto his prick. I lubed him up and applied some to my pucker as well, then swung a leg over him until I was kneeling, straddling his hips. I held his dick upright behind me while I slowly sat back until the head was against my tight pucker. I wiggled my butt for a few seconds to get used to the feel and then lowered myself onto him.
I smiled down at him as he slipped into my ass. It was a tight fit at first since I hadn't taken the time to stretch my hole at all, but I slowly slid down his pole until I was sitting on his pubes, impaled on his steel-hard rod. I raised myself up, tightening my muscle around him as I did, then plunged back down. Each time I did it I went a little faster and sat a little harder until I was forcefully fucking myself on his cock. After a few minutes of that I carefully rolled us both over until he was on top and I wrapped my legs around his hips, pulling him into me even more.
"Okay, time for you to do a little of the work. Fuck me, Patrick."
He began to pump into me. The first few times he missed my prostate but when he changed the angle and hit it I made sure he knew. He was a quick learner and hit it nearly every time after that. He only lasted a few minutes before his breathing and pumping got quicker and I could tell he was about to blow. I grabbed my dick hard and stroked it, working myself up to the point of orgasm just as he began to throb in my hole. As we came down from our high he lay down on top of me and kissed me.
"See, Patrick? That wasn't so bad, was it?"
"No, it was great, actually. Was it okay for you?"
"Yeah, it was. Once you got going you were great. How come you don't top more?"
"I've done it a few times but mostly I just love a cock pounding away at my ass, filling me up. I like the physical part a lot, but mostly it fills some emotional need, I think."
"I can understand that. I feel the same way when someone is making love to me. But I love being on top as well. Maybe it's a power thing. Sometimes I like to have the power, sometimes I like to be overpowered."
"Well, Coy, I hope you want to overpower me a lot."
It was late when we woke up and by the time we'd showered and dressed it was time for lunch. We stopped at a deli and had sandwiches on the way to the train station.
"Say, how about brunch tomorrow?"
"I don't know. I'll probably get in late from work tonight and be exhausted. If I get up late I might not get a train down here in time for brunch."
"Sleep as late as you want. I'll drive up and pick you up and we can go to New Hope."
I gave him my address so he could get the directions from Mapquest and we decided to aim for noon. He said he'd call me when he got to Trenton.
I was still sleeping when he called. I told him to wait downstairs and I'd be down as soon as I could. I figured the way things were going if he came up to the room we'd never make it to brunch. I took a quick shower and threw some clothes on and ran downstairs. He was waiting just outside the door and led me to a dark blue Jetta halfway down the block.
"Nice car."
"Thanks. Living in Center City I don't have much need for a car but I love the freedom it gives me."
I directed him to the highway and in just over fifteen minutes we were pulling into the parking lot at The Raven. As we were being shown to our table in the dining room I spotted a familiar face across the room, my history teacher, Mr. Cutter. My first impulse was to go over and say hello, but then I thought he might find it uncomfortable, running into a student in a gay place. Besides, he was with a woman and I had no idea what that meant. Plus, I'd made it sound like I was in college when I talked to Patrick about school so I was afraid if I introduced him to Mr. Cutter it might come out that I was studying for my high school diploma. So I pretended I didn't know him, although I was sure he saw me and recognized me as well.
Patrick did most of the talking while we ate. He told me about experiences he'd had at The Raven and at a dance club called The Cartwheel that bad been just up the road but had closed after a fire a few months before. He seemed to know quite a few people in New Hope. He said lots of guys from Philly came up there on the weekends, especially in the summer. His other favorite summer weekend spot was Atlantic City, which was just over an hour from Philly. He couldn't believe I'd never been there and promised to take me. I noticed that he didn't talk about his job this time, probably because he'd noticed my eyes glaze over when he described it the week before. I talked a little about Minho and Buddies, the only club I had any experience with.
About halfway through our meal Mr. Cutter and his friend got up and left. He nodded and smiled as they passed our table, but fortunately he didn't stop. Patrick and I lingered for a while after we were done eating, talking some more. This was the most comfortable we'd been yet, and it was nice. When he drove me back to Trenton he parked in front of the rooming house but didn't want to come up. He said that as much as he loved sex with me, it had been a great afternoon being together out of bed, just getting to know each other better. He could wait until my next trip down to Philly for another sexual marathon. It was just as well. If anything I was in the mood to be fucked and I didn't think I'd be able to get him to top a second time in one weekend.
After he left I went upstairs intending to read but instead I just lay on the bed thinking for a while. The more I got to know Patrick the more I liked him. He was a great guy and sex with him was great, but still, something just wasn't right. Maybe it was his age. He was nearly eight years older than me. That wasn't all that much, but he seemed so much more grown up than Manny or Marcus. Of course, he was lots younger than Derek, but my relationship with Derek was much simpler. We were casual friends who had sex because he paid me. Norman was even older but my relationship with him was different, too. We were friends, but Norman was also more of an advisor as well and there was nothing sexual about our relationship.
But trying to have a romantic relationship with someone who was that much older, who had already finished school and had a career, was difficult. The difference in our ages seemed so obvious. And his personality puzzled me. Outside the bedroom he was a take-charge kind of guy, someone who knew what he wanted and went after it. But in bed he really was a total bottom. It felt weird for me, a kid, to be topping someone like him all the time.
I decided I was overanalyzing things. We were only two weekends into our relationship. As Norman had said, I had to give it a chance and see what developed so I pushed thoughts of Patrick out of my mind and picked up my history book.
Tuesday afternoon I had trouble paying attention in history class. I kept staring at Mr. Cutter, thinking of him at The Raven on Sunday. I'd never really thought of him as a person up until then. He was a teacher, that was all. I looked him over as he taught the class. He was somewhat younger than Norman, but not much, maybe around fifty. He had short blond hair with lots of gray mixed through it, had a pretty average face and wore glasses. He was around six feet tall and had an average build, too. When the class ended and everyone was packing up to leave he spoke to me.
"Mr. Walton, can I have a word with you, please?"
I hung around as a couple of students asked him a question or two and then he turned to me.
"Did you enjoy your brunch the other day?" He smiled.
"Yes, I did. I'd had brunch there once before and they do a nice job."
"Yes, they do. I try to get up to The Raven at least once a month. Look, the reason I wanted to talk to you is that you seemed nervous when you saw me there and I wanted to let you know that you shouldn't be. I won't tell anyone I saw you there if that was what you were worried about."
"Oh no, that wasn't it. I was just surprised to see you there. I wasn't sure who that was you were with or what was going on with you so I figured it was probably better to say nothing."
"I was with my friend Janet. She's a lesbian. We've been friends forever."
"Oh. I figured it was probably something like that. But to be honest, the real reason that I didn't want my date to meet you was that I told him I was going to county college but didn't let on that it was the GED program."
"You shouldn't be ashamed of being in this program. You should be proud of what you're doing, how you're helping your future."
"Once I get the GED I'll be really proud, but until then being a dropout just makes me seem like an irresponsible kid, so I'd prefer to keep quiet about it until I fix things."
"Okay, I just wanted to be sure you didn't have any problems with finding out I was gay or me finding out you were gay. I'm out to the faculty and administration here so you don't have to worry about what you say."
"I'm pretty much out to everyone, too, so everything is cool."
"I'm glad we talked. I didn't want this issue to interfere with class for you. You've been doing very well so far."
"That's because I cheat." His eyes opened wide and I smiled. "One of my best friends is a retired history teacher. He goes over everything with me every week. It's like having a tutor."
"No wonder you're doing so well. You should do fine on the exam the way you're going. How are you doing in English class?"
"Not bad but I don't have a tutor for that so I have to work harder on my own."
"Don't worry about it. I'm sure you'll do just fine. And that was a pretty hot looking date you were with, by the way."
"Yeah, he is, isn't he?"
Norman had made an appointment for me with the assistant director of the shelter on Wednesday morning at ten. I got there and filled out a volunteer application, sort of like a job application and gave it to her. She was a slim black woman in her early thirties named Mrs. Redding. She made a copy of my driver's license and attached it to the application and went over the information.
"You're younger than I was led to believe." She frowned.
"Is that a problem?"
"Not exactly, but you're a minor so we'll need a parent's signature."
I explained about my legal custody arrangement and gave her Nancy's direct number at the law firm. "We don't have to make a big deal about my age, do we?"
"You mean you want to keep it a secret?"
"Well, when people hear I'm seventeen they treat me like a kid. I'm living on my own and supporting myself so I'd rather be treated like an adult. That's why I say I'm nineteen. Except for needing a guardian's signature now and then there's really no difference anyway."
"I understand. It doesn't make a difference to me. In any case, the information you put on the application is confidential. Let me show you around and then we'll go over some of the things you might end up doing for us."
She took me on a tour of the place. There were separate living quarters for men, women and families. The men's area was by far the largest. On the main level were the kitchen and dining area, which I was already familiar with, and offices, laundry facilities, and storage. She said that the unemployed residents were all assigned chores in exchange for their room and board. She explained that it was important that they felt they were contributing in some way. The paid staff was fairly small and included administrators and social workers. Volunteers filled in the gaps between what the staff and the residents did. I would probably spend most of my time in the office doing data entry, transferring the information on the applications into the computers and doing filing. I might have to help out with cleaning or in the laundry now and then if needed. After I'd been there a while and was more familiar with the services offered I might fill in at the front desk like Norman did.
The next few weekend dates with Patrick were pretty much the same. Twice I went down to Philadelphia and spent the night. We went out to eat, went to the club and fucked like maniacs every minute we were in his apartment. I topped him every time. Once he drove up to Trenton and we went to Minho to eat and then to Buddies. We had a quick fuck in my room when he first arrived, but that was it. I wasn't taking any chances on us falling asleep and then getting into trouble with Lucille. By the middle of March it was pretty clear to me that the relationship was fun but it wasn't going anywhere. I was relieved over a dinner at Cosi to find out Patrick was thinking the same thing.
"I like you an awful lot, Coy, and the sex we've been having has been wild, but something just isn't clicking here."
"I've been feeling that too, Patrick. I'm not sure just what it is that isn't right. I know the commute and our schedules are problems. We don't get to see much of each other. But that's not it. When we're together it's lots of fun, but that's all it is."
"Back when we met on New Year's Eve, I think I mentioned that I was usually into older guys. That probably says something about what I need, deep down. I'm good at taking care of myself and running my own life but maybe deep down I'm looking for someone who is going to help take care of me and make me feel even more secure. Maybe that's one of the reasons behind the whole bottom thing with me, aside from loving a big dick up my butt, that is." He smiled.
"Yeah, I've felt a bit awkward about the age thing, too. I think I need a guy who's my age and who is going through the same kind of things I am. I'm certainly not in the position to be taking care of someone else, especially an older lawyer."
"Hey, you make me sound like a decrepit old man."
"I didn't mean to. You're anything but. It isn't so much the difference in years but that we're in such different places in our lives. You're already started on your career and I haven't even given any thought to one yet. As much as I love having older friends who can give me advice, I think that as far as a relationship goes, I need to be with someone like me who's just starting out."
"And as good as I am with taking care of important matters for clients at work, I don't want to have to do that for someone in my personal life. I'm not ready to be a daddy."
"And now you're making me sound like a little kid. I'm not a baby, you know."
"I'm very aware of that, Coy. I think what we're both saying is that we're looking for an equal kind of relationship, but there are too many areas where we're not equal. We're just not the right fit."
"So can we still be friends?"
"Sure, I'd love that, although with us living in different cities in different states our paths probably won't cross very often. But when I start going up to New Hope in the spring I'll give you a call. And if you're ever in Philly..."
"I'll definitely call you if I'm going to be in town."
"And if you ever need a hot lawyer who loves to get fucked..."
"Well, I've already got a lawyer, they're a dime a dozen, but an ass like yours doesn't come along every day. I'll certainly keep you in mind."
I didn't spend the night. After a breakup conversation like that it would have felt too sad to go back to his place and make love one last time. So after dinner Patrick walked me to the train station and I went back home. We did share one last sweet, passionate kiss in the waiting room, though.
To be continued.