All the usual disclaimers apply to this story. I am not going to say this is all fiction, but I have tried to be as vague as possible to protect those who might not like to be known. The following story Involves sex between two teen males. If that bothers you, then please don't read. Please be at least 18 or within your Legal right to be able to read it in your area. Thanks 8-)
I also would like to thank 2 very important people. First, Billy Joe Walker Jr. You were always an inspiration to me. Your writing moved me more than you will ever know. Secondly, Dave I love you. Thanks for being my best friend
Come Sail Away
Chapter 8
Well Eric, as far as I know you have never given me a reason not to trust you. Would you feel better if I did?" I looked at him for a reaction. He looked up and kind of shrugged his shoulders.
He did not answer me. We sat there and silently smoked, neither one of us wanting to break the silence first. I stared out at the lake again. The breeze had seemed to all but quiet down. Now there was just a silence in the air that could only be described as peaceful. The silence was broken, his voice softly asking me.
"So, who's Brian?"
I snapped my head around, and just looked at him. I had a sudden urge to vomit. Just a few seconds passed before he looked up. Im sure he saw the look on my face.
"I looked inside the bag when I couldn't find you. I was looking for an address, or a phone number so I could get the bag back to you, or to ever it belonged to."
I sat there and looked at him. If he read the inside of the book, then he knew I was gay. I reached down and grabbed the Backpack.
"Well, thanks for bringing it back." I stood and started to walk away. I wanted to run, but my feet wouldn't move that fast.
"Hey Scott"
I stopped. I was now waiting for some derogatory comment to come sailing my way. I stood there. I didn't even turn around. My mind was saying run, but my legs wouldn't move.
"Did I say, or do something that changed your trust in me?
I stood perfectly still. I hadn't moved a muscle since he called out my name. I turned slowly back to where he was still sitting on top of the picnic table. I studied his face for some kind of reaction, some meaning to his last comment. He was sitting with his arms resting on top of his knees. He reached in his pocket and pulled out his smokes. Extending his hand he offered me one.
"You know." He paused. Pulled out his lighter, and lit a smoke.
"Its not that windy out here today to make someone's eyes tear up. I have seen you sitting here all day. You have been walking around and." He stopped and looked at me. His eyes had a tenderness to them. The same look that I always seen in Brian's eyes.
"I mean your not thinking about doing something stupid are you?"
I let the arm that was holding the backpack drop down to my side. I looked up into the air and just sighed. I labored and took several deep breaths; I was trying to clear my head. I walked back towards the table slowly. I felt tired. He rolled his sleeve back, and showed me his wrist. There was a scar.
"Cause if you are, its not worth It." He looked up at my face. All the toughness I seen the first time was gone. All that was left was the look of a scared child. I just stared into his eyes. I didn't really know what to say. I walked over and dropped my backpack on the end of the table.
"No, im not thinking of doing anything stupid. I was just sitting here and thinking, that's all."
"Do you want to talk about it? Sometimes talking about it is better than trying to deal with it yourself."
I looked at him and tried to put on a smile.
"Well some things you can talk about, some things you can't. Not everyone wants to hear some one else's problems." I was obviously showing signs of self-pity.
"Damn dude, do you think you are the only person who has come out here with a problem?"
He raised his voice in obvious frustration at me. This caught me by surprises. I turned and looked away. I didn't know how to deal with this anymore. I just wanted to come out here and think. Now I was in over my head. I turned back towards him; his eyes were still on me.
"How much did you read inside that book?"
He looked down at the ground and flicked his Cigarette butt in the air. He blew his smoke out heavily.
"Enough to know that it was important to find you. I figured that it was something that you didn't want to lose."
I started to speak but stopped. I shuffled my feet around a little and just nodded my head. I didn't really know what to say. I didn't know how much he wanted to hear. How do you come out and just tell someone that you are gay?
"Well, I don't know what to really say to that. I guess you know that im.."
I stopped and just looked at him. I couldn't say it. My brain wouldn't let the words come out of my mouth. I stared at him; he just sat there and looked back at me. I stuffed my hands in my pocket and turned away. I didn't look at him when I asked him.
"Have you ever read Poe?"
"Yeah in school."
I turned to look at him. Im sure my face said it all. I kind of swaggered a little over towards the table. My hands were still in my pockets, and clenched with nervousness.
"Brian loved Poe, and I loved Brian."
There I thought, I had said it. I now just looked at him for a reaction. He reached in his coat pocket, and pulled out a partially drank bottle of Mountain Dew. He unscrewed the top and took a swig. He set the bottle down on the table and kind of sniffed. He put his hand up to his nose and wiped.
"Seems to me, from what I read. He loved you too. Mind me asking you what happened?"
"Do you really want to know?" I looked at him in disbelief.
"Yeah I do." He folded his arms and just leaned down on his knees again.
"Well O.K., where do you want me to start?"
He smiled for the first time. He laughed a little and kind of threw his hands up in the air.
"Well the beginning always works for me."
That laugh had a ring to it, like a bell that I haven't heard toll in a long time. I walked over and sat down. I reached in my pocket and lit a smoke. I started my story from the beginning. He sat there and just listened. Every once in awhile he would laugh at some comment I made. He even became sober and quiet when I told him about Brian putting the Baseball on Brent's Gravestone. I finished, and I told him what I was thinking about when he walked up.
"So, what happened next?" He got up and walked around, and stood in front of me.
"You mean when we were in Green Bay?" He nodded his head. I reached over for the Backpack and pulled out the book. I held it in my hands. It was like opening up a portal. I once again started telling him about Green Bay........................
I woke up to a dark and silent room. I remember Brian reading to me before I fell asleep. I woke up with my head on Brian's lap; he too was fast asleep. I lay my head back down and just enjoyed the closeness of the moment. At that moment I became aware that my face was no more than inches from Brian's hidden treasure. I knew this, because it was obvious that he had a raging hard-on. My mind went into overdrive. All sorts of possibilities went through my mind. Some I can say, that I am ashamed of, even to this day.
Here I was, lying in bed with the perfect person. In my mind he had met all the definitions of perfection. Smart, funny, and he always make my heart explode with joy. I thought of all kind of things I wished I could do. I can really say at that moment I knew there was no one else for me. I couldn't do it, I just couldn't. I wanted him, but not like this. I stayed still and let my mind drift with all kinds of thoughts. I was now so hard that my balls hurt.
Brian started to move a little and I just stayed still. His movement now placed my face directly on top of his groin. I could feel the heat from his cock on my cheek. This was driving me nuts. My mind was screaming, "Go for it". I started to slide off him very slowly. I didn't want any sudden movements to wake him. As my face moved backwards, His cocked throbbed, and pulsed. It was then; I felt a wet spot on the front of his jeans. My nose was filled with the smell of Pre-cum.
I stopped. The animal instinct in me was telling me to just do it. To reach down and take what you have been wanting. I sat there for a second, and just felt my heart beating in my throat. I was starting to shake with lustful excitement. I felt his cock throb again, and this time Brian Stirred a little. I was now paralyzed with fear that he would wake up and find my face on top of his cock. He mumbled and his hand came down and rested on top of my shoulder. If he woke up right now, this wouldn't look good.
It was at that moment I felt him squeeze my shoulder. I stopped breathing. I lifted my head and turned and looked up at him. The room was dark, but I could still see his face. His eyes were closed, and he did look asleep. I studied his face for any kind of movement. There were none. I slid back off of him and got up from the bed. As I stood there, he moved around and kind of curled up. I walked to the Bathroom and shut the door. I made my way to the sink, and turned the water on.
I looked in the mirror at my reflection. I cursed myself for even thinking there was something there. Brian was my friend. He was only a friend. I had to get a grip on this, or I was going to loose the best friend I ever had. I splashed water on my face and then used the toilet. I flushed and walked out into the room. I looked at the clock for the first time. We had a little over an hour before the start of the game. I sat on the edge of the bed and just stared at Brian. I think at that moment I knew that I was going to have to tell him. I was going to tell him that I loved him. I just didn't know when.
I reached over and brushed the hair back from his face. He looked so beautiful when he slept. I gently reached down and caressed his arm. The feel of his skin was too smooth to describe. I stopped and just let my hand stay on his arm. My heart was beating so fast I could hear it. I looked at him and felt nothing but love. I wanted so badly to love him. I just wanted to be able to show him. I looked one last time before I woke him up.
I reached over and caressed the side of his cheek, and marveled at the smooth feeling on the back of my hand.
"Brian, come on buddy, time to wake up."
He started to move and opened his eyes. I looked down at him and smiled. I let all the love I held in my heart just pour out of me at that moment. He looked up at me and got a perplexed expression on his face.
"What, let me guess. You were watching me do that funny thing with my nose again."
I just laughed and reached down and hugged him.
"What was that for?" I looked at him, trying to think of an answer to give him. Shrugging my shoulders.
"I don't know, I guess you just make me laugh. You can always make me laugh."
He just got a smart-assed look on his face, and said.
"Does this mean you still want to take a warm shower with me?"
I jumped up and ran to the bathroom, and turned on the shower. I peeked my head out from around the corner, and Brian was just sitting there shaking his head. I just shrugged my shoulders and turned it off.
"Come on dude, let's go get something to eat. Im starved."
I suggested that we might as well get ready to go to the game. We only had an hour before face off. We grabbed our stuff and headed out the door. There was a light snow falling as we got in the truck. It was nice. Snow always makes everything look clean and bright.
We stopped by the ole trusty McDonalds on the way and got to our seats just before Face Off. The game was great. Bobby Likso, our favorite player scored a hat trick and was kick ass as usual. Towards the end of the 3rd period we made our way down to where the players walked off. We won the game by a score of 8-4. As Bobby walked by he stopped and said hi. It was so cool. As he left he handed me his stick. Smiling he said,
"Well anyone that drives that far to watch me play deserves something eh?"
I couldn't believe it. I got Bobby's stick. It was the one he used in the game to score 3 goals. We were turning to walk away, when another player handed Brian his stick. This was so cool; we have to go to more road games. We walked to the truck and just talked about how great this was. We were both smiling and joking, the moment just seemed so perfect. Snow on the ground, and we were together. What more could I want.
"Damn dude, has this been the best day ever?" Brian was like on a high. He was jumping around, and bouncing off everything.
"Yeah, this has been great. I can't remember the last time I had this much fun."
We brushed the snow off the truck, and put our new sticks behind the seat. As we drove back to the hotel, my mind was still on this afternoon. I should tell him how I feel. I need to get this off my chest and just tell him. My mind wanted to explode. I couldn't hold these feelings anymore. I decided that tonight was the night I was going to tell him. I just had to wait for the right time.
We pulled back into the hotel. The place was packed. There didn't appear to be an open room anywhere. The parking spot in front of our room was taken. We parked back a ways and walked. As we got close to the room, Brian took off running for the door. I shook my head, and wondered where he got all of his energy. I looked down at my pocket and was reaching in for the room key when it happened. (Splat) The little shit hit me with a snowball. I looked up and seen he was making another. I shoved the room key back in my pocket and announced
"This means war."
To this he started laughing. By now we were both yelling at each other and having a full- blown snowball fight out in the parking lot at Midnight. I made my attack. I rushed him and tackled him on the ground outside the Main office. I wrestled him to the ground and we rolled in the snow throwing handfuls of it at each other as fast as we could.
"Hey."
We both looked up at the sound of someone yelling at us. The Hotel Manager was standing in his doorway with a serious look of being pissed off. He stood there for a second and then shook his head at us.
"Come on guys, keep it down. I don't want to get phone calls complaining that there is a couple of hoodlums making too much noise." To this we both kind of smiled and got up.
"Uh, sorry about that." I looked up at him and he just smiled. We both made our way over to the room. We continued bumping into each other, and telling each other person how lucky they were.
"Yeah, well if he hadn't come out, I was just getting ready to make my move and take you down." Brian grinned while he said this and I just had to laugh.
We walked in the room, both of us cold and wet. I kicked off my shoes and turned the Room Heater up to high. We both grabbed our bags and were looking for something to change into. The laughing continued as I started to take my wet things off. Brian went into the bathroom and threw me a towel. I looked up as Brian was pulling his shirt over his head. The cold had made his nipples hard, and if possible even more beautiful. The way droplets of water dripped from his hairs was incredible.
"Boy a warm shower sounds good right now. What do you think Brian, you up for one?"
He shook his head, and I busted out laughing. All I got in return was a wet shirt thrown at me. I was standing there in my shorts and Brian in his Boxers, when I decided that it was time to continue this fight. I threw the shirt back at him. Brian ran to the bed and grabbed a pillow. I ran to the other side and grabbed mine.
"Now don't bite off more than you can chew." I laughed and looked at him.
"Well then." He smiled and got that grin again. "If it's more than I can chew, then I guess were not talking about your dick are we?"
"Oh, you are such a smart-ass. For that comment, you die."
I lunged at him and took my first swing of the pillow. Missing, he nailed me good upside my head. I rolled over and swung back. Just glancing him a little. He swung and nailed me again. I covered my head and his attack went on. By now he was laughing so hard that he was hardly hitting me.
"O.K., I give.....I give....."
Brian was jumping up and down on the bed proclaiming his battle victory. I looked up and just laughed. He threw the pillow down and was now flexing his muscles and talking trash. I was laughing so hard that it hurt. He fell on the bed next to me. His body rolled over against mine, and laughed with me. As we calmed down, I just knew that it couldn't get any better than this. My heart felt like it was going to explode from happiness. I just wanted to reach over and hug him.
We both just lay there, enjoying the moment. I know I have never had this much fun with anyone else. The way he made me happy was like nothing I had ever felt before. Brian looked up at me and smiled. I knew he liked me. I could see that in his eyes.
"Scott" he paused for a second, and just looked at me.
"Yeah buddy" the smile on my face said it all.
"Thanks. This was the best birthday present I have ever had. You really are the best friend I could ever want."
"Your welcome."
I sat there and looked into his eyes. I was going to tell him. Now was the right time. I started to speak, but nothing came out. Fear stopped me from saying it. I didn't want to loose him. I didn't want this feeling to end. I would rather have this, than nothing.
"So. What do you want to do tonight?" I came out of my thoughts and shook my head.
"I don't know, what did you want to do?" it was at that moment that I remembered my surprise. "Hey, go to the bathroom and grab two glasses"
"Huh." Brian just looked at me, his face showed confusion.
"I forgot that I have one last birthday surprise for you. Go. Go. Get the glasses."
I jumped from the bed and walked to my bag. Brian ran in to the bathroom and walked out with two glasses.
I looked him straight in the eyes and smiled. He stood there looking at me.
"Here you go, Happy Birthday"
I reached in my bag and pulled out a bottle of Champagne. His eyes got the size of dinner plates. He grabbed the bottle and smiled.
"Damn dude, where did you get this?" holding the bottle he got this huge grin on his face.
"I took it from my folks cabinet, they have so many of them. I know they will never miss one."
I took the bottle back from him and motioned for him to sit on the bed. I walked over to the Television, and found the MTV channel and turned the volume down low. I Walked over to him and sat down. Handing him the glasses, I peeled the foil from the bottle, and popped the cork. We both just laughed as I poured two glasses. It felt like we were getting away with the biggest crime of our lives.
"A toast." I held my glass up and looked at him. "To road trips, with Best Friends. Happy Birthday Buddy."
"Yeah, this had been a great time, thanks Scott."
We sat there and talked and drank the whole bottle of semi warm Champagne. It was now almost 2:30 A.M. We decided that we should get ready for bed. I grabbed all the glasses and threw away the bottle. I turned off the light and T.V., and crawled under the covers. The lights from outside made the room have a weird glow to it. We lay there for a while and talked. I remember drifting off to sleep with thoughts of Brian in my head.
I remember waking up to being kicked. Brian was having another Nightmare. I reached over and tried to calm him. I stroked his hair and just whispered that it was all right. He seemed to calm down a little. I snuggled over next to him. I wrapped my arm around him, and held him tight. I loved him so much, and wished I could make it go away. I let my hand gently caress his chest and stomach. His breathing returned to normal, and he nudged his way closer to me. I laid my head down on the pillow and breathed out a long sigh. God how I loved him, I just wish I could tell him. I continued to caress his stomach, and fall more and more in love. I felt so content to lie next to him. It just felt so right. Nothing ever felt so right in my whole life. I started to fall back into my dream world again, when I felt it. This time I knew what it was. Brian was Hard. I could feel it against my hand.
I left my hand there and didn't move. I was scared. I was scared at what I was thinking. I wanted him so bad, but I just couldn't have him like this. I moved my arm and caressed his stomach again. This time I brought my arm down a little lower than before and stopped it just inches from his throbbing cock. I let my arm and hand relax again. I was right on top of it now. I could feel its fullness under my hand. It throbbed under my touch. I was now hard and my little head was doing the thinking. I gently closed my hand over his cock and marveled at how wonderful it felt. It continued to throb under my touch and I knew that this is what I wanted. I stopped and pulled my hand back, I needed more though, and I wanted it all. I wanted Brian. I sat up a little. I can't believe I was doing this. I wanted to cry. I just felt so hopeless. I wanted something I couldn't have. I sat up and turned away from Brian. I buried my head in my hands and wanted to cry.
"I love you Brian, I love you so much." I didn't even know that I had said it out load.
"Scott."
I heard his voice and my whole body became stiff.
"What did you just say?"
I sat there now afraid of what just happened. I didn't know what to do, or what to say. I was on the edge of crying. I sniffed, and took a big breath.
"What, what did you say Buddy?"
"I said. What did you just say a second ago?"
I paused for a second and knew now was the time to tell him. Well I did have a better vision of how I was going to tell him. I took a big breath and turned to look at him. He was sitting up resting on his elbow. I looked him straight in his eyes and sighed.
"I love you. That's what I said.
I sat there and just looked at him. I didn't move, his face showed no expression. He turned and threw off the covers and sat up.
"Where are you going?
He didn't answer me as he stood up. He started to walk away.
"What are you doing?
I felt totally helpless. How was I going to explain this to his mom? Brian was going to run out of here and I was going to have to tell her why. He walked around the bed.
"Where are you going?" He looked at me; I had tears in my eyes now.
"Where I should have gone the minute I knew that you felt this way."
He rounded the bed and stood in front of me. I just stared into his eyes. My vision was blurred because of the tears. He dropped down to his knee, reaching up he brushed my tears away. I sat there stunned; I didn't know what he was doing.
I looked into his eyes for some kind of meaning. Some sign of what he was doing.
"So, your in love too huh?"
I was dazed and confused. I know I just stared at him with a blank look on my face.
"Huh."
That was all I could say. He leaned forward and gently kissed me. It was the most incredible thing I had ever felt. He pulled back and just stared at me.
"Oh Scott" He smiled and looked into my eyes with a love I had never seen before in my life. "Do you really love me?" He wiped the tear away from my cheek again. "Do you really love me? Love me as much as I love you?"
It dawned on me. He was telling me that he loved me too. I burst out crying, and grabbed him.
"Yes Brian, I love you. God I love you so much. I love you so much it hurts."
Brian squeezed me tight. I felt a hot flash that rolled over my body like a wave of warmth. It felt like my whole life finally made sense. I squeezed him tight and just let it all out. I started rambling on about how much I loved him, and when I first knew.
"You know when I realized I first loved you?" Brian got this grin on his face. I just stared at him and smiled. I shook my head no.
"I knew I first loved you for sure, when we stayed at the cabin. We were out on the deck watching the sunset. I knew at that moment there was no one else I wanted to be with."
He stood up and pushed me back on the bed. He jumped up on top of me and straddled his legs over my hips. He started laughing. I looked at him and thought he had gone nuts.
"What are you laughing about?"
"This, this is just so perfect. I didn't think I could ever say it. I knew you liked me, but I didn't know if you felt the same way." He looked down at me and just glowed. The whole room seemed to glow.
"I can finally say it. I love you Scott. I love you."
He bent over and placed both of his hands on my face. He slowly lowered his lips to mine. The kiss seemed to last forever. I don't think it was the best kiss we ever shared, but it was the one I will remember the most. I can still feel his lips on mine....
I sat there with the feeling of Brian's lips on my mind. I looked over at Eric; he was just looking out at the water. He cleared his throat and said.
"You know, I never fell in love."
He stammered for a second, and then looked over at me. I could see pain in his eyes. It was a pain that I seen a long time ago in someone else's heart.
Well there you go. Chapter 8 is now on the books. Sorry to take so long. It was just too important to rush through. I wanted it to be just right. To all the friends I have made. Thank you. To all the friends I have yet to meet. I look forward to it. To my fan club in New Zealand: Im packing my bags boys. And finally to Eric, you are the best. My face once again has a smile on it. My heart once again sings a song of joy. THANKS. U2