Outside the bar, I leaned on the wall and tried to reason with myself. I so much wanted to go back in and referee the squabble and hopefully go home with the Sarah. I have to say my emotions and my brain were having an argument and my emotions put up a good fight. Eventually my brain won out and I went home. Once there I mixed myself a drink and undressed, I ordered some silk pj's for Christmas for myself and tonight seemed like the perfect indulgent occasion to wear them. In my mauve slinky's I returned to the kitchen and made a bagel, smeared it with peanut butter and retired to the living room. I gave television a try but was way too distracted to focus, so I turned off the set and put a cd in. Joni Mitchell's " Blue", I have a soft spot for her and her music and no recording better represents her talent than "Blue ". This was a bad mistake, as she sang about romance and affaires and all sad songs, I became more forlorn about the evening. Eventually I made another drink and curled up in my favorite chair, and decided to have an old fashioned pity party. I tried to convince myself I was sad for Sarah and her situation but I was only lying to myself. I was full of self pity for the one that got away. When the cd ended, I put on Bonnie Raitt and my melancholy did not improve. I
began to cry and was willing to cry my eyes dry when the door bell rang. "Who on earth would stop by unannounced this time of night?" My mind went on high alert,, there had been many rapes in the neighborhood this year, so I flipped on all the outside lights and my living room overhead as well. Through the peep hole I could make oput her blonde hair, it was wet and matted, apparently the rains had come, bringing some relief to the hot weather. I opened the door to a soaked Sarah and brought her in before she got any wetter. In the process I noted there was no Rose Marie, so in a small way I was elated by the outcome. "My God you are soaked to the skin, did you walk over?" Sarah just shook, her teeth nearly chattering from the chill rain outside. "Come in the bathroom, get those wet cloths off and I will bring you a couple towel and a robe." I ws not thinking beyond human interaction, I had to get the girl warm and fast. Stopping in the kitchen for a couple moments I put on a pot of coffee and took the towels and robe back to the bathroom. I knocked and handed the stuff past a half open door. "How about a hot coffee with Baileys?" I said around the door. "That would be nice." I could tell from her cadence she was still shivering. Before I left, I added, "My blow dryer is hanging on the back of the door, get a hot bath if you want." It was a time to chill out and wait for her to come out, I did not need to add any more stress to her night, so I finished making the coffee, added some Baileys and then took it to the bathroom door . I knocked and passed it through when she opened it. I got a glimpse of her tussled hair and mascara stained face, she was lovely even in this state. I went back in the living room and shut off all the lights but a low lamp and put Joni back on. I was just now realizing what I had just done. Perhaps
Rose Marie would come looking for Sarah and we could have a scene right here. All I knew for sure was I was happy Sarah had made her break and thrilled she chose to run to me. Time passed slowly as it does here in the mountains, I waited and listened for the four hundredth time to Joni's lyrics, humming along in places. I was dying to talk to Sarah directly, and flashed back on our eye contact in the bar. She was so open and deep, her soul beckoning me in. Time passed and I got a bit restless, I was about to stand and check on Sarah when I heard the bathroom door open. Sarah entered the room all fresh and warm, her hair dry now and brushed. My pink fuzzy robe made her look so warm and inviting. Her creamy skin was so clean it squeaked, She approached me and before I could speak, she knelt in front of me and placed her head in my lap. She began to cry and then openly weep. All I could do was caress her hair and neck and coo soft ok's to her. Joni kept tugging at my heart and assuring me love conquers all. I just waited and soon Sarah was nearly cried out. I reached for a tissue and handed it to her. She dabbed her eyes and sniffled, trying to speak but only was able to sob. "I am so sorry, I had no where else to go, I left Rosie in the Hotel and walked here, thank you for letting me in." She moved up on me and hugged me tight, her body embracing mine. I held her for several minute s as she finished crying and wiped her eyes again. Before I could react, she leaned in and planted a soft kiss on my lips, my arms instinctively encircled her and I held her close. I found myself kissing her back and holding her body tight to mine. I was holding a wounded deer, but in my mind she was more than that, she was a fragile little girl hidden in a woman's body. We kissed for some time, she was now curled up in my lap like a child and I began to realize what a sensitive woman she was, full of emotions and love. Rose Marie had over stepped her bounds with her and turned her against the relationship. "Come on Sarah, I will tuck you in and we can talk in the morning. She did not fight me, her emotions were played out and she was exhausted. I put her
in my bed and pulled the covers up to her chin; I rubbed her forehead and hair gently and watched her fall off to sleep. I sat up for another half hour listening to the soft music and wondering what would become of us in the morning. Curling up on the sofa I threw a comforter over me and let my darling sleep it off, surely she would need some time to get over Rosie and I would not want to intrude on her emotions, although I was willing and able to have her if she wanted. My dreams were vivid and frequent, I was in passion sometimes, sad others and mostly uncomfortable, tossing to find a soft spot to maintain my rest. Sarah made frequent guest appearances, of course in odd and cock eyed ways, in each appearance she was there in all her glory a loving beauty. I smiled at times, I know because I woke up with my lips in a broad smile once. The morning came quickly; I awoke with a dry mouth and slight headache from the drinks the night before. As I lay there gathering my wits, I remembered Sarah in my bed, I first smiled, then became concerned, As quietly as possible I crept near the bedroom and could see her body softly raising the covers with her gentle breaths. I carefully closed the bedroom door and tip toed to the kitchen to make us some coffee and breakfast. When the coffee was ready, I poured a double Baileys in my cup and topped it off with coffee. Taking a sip I declared it delicious. I had some blueberry muffin mix and decide to make that up, turning on the oven and then reading the directions, I mixed the batter. In the fridge I found a stick of butter which I set out on a plate to soften, The coffee, make that the Bailey's was doing its job, my hangover was letting up and I was feeling pretty good again, not as happy as the night before
but alright. Suddenly the thought of Sarah's sisters wedding crossed my mind and I began to worry about how long I should let her sleep and what would she wear and a bunch of details that did not concern me. It was right then I realized I was falling in love with someone I did not even know. Was it the eye contact or the gentle signals she emitted? I had no idea but I was definitely smitten. What a mess I had created, I should never have interfered, no way should I have left my address. For Christ sake, these women were in a relationship, it might be on the rocks but I had no business butting in. Then the line drawing on Rose's card came in my mind like an intruder and the look on Sarah 's face, the look of disappointment and betrayal. I knew deep inside what an incredibly sensitive and loving woman Sarah was and how much she values her privacy. I should just drive her back to the hotel and let Rose and her make nice at the wedding and forget the whole thing, last night was last night, the cold hard light of day was upon us and I had no role in this drama. Then the paranoia hit again, what if Rose Marie shows up, pissed and takes it out on me? How do I handle it? I am not technically involved, at least not yet, I was just a port in the storm. I had to do something to keep my mind busy, I was creating straw dogs where they did not exist. I went to the bathroom and found Sarah's cloths all hung on the shower curtain to dry. Her dress, her lace bra and matching panties and her shoes were all there, still plenty damp. I took the cloths and headed for the washer and put the shoes in the window where the sun would soon hit them, As I headed for the washer I subconsciously smelled her dress and swooned, Her scent was all over her cloths and it was delightful. There was no doubt now in my mind Sarah would be on my list of potential life partners when she wraps up her relationship with Rose. I find her sensitivity appealing, her looks are overwhelming and she has class and taste. What else is there, she kisses like a dream and I am sure she is a sensitive lover, I can feel it in her personality. Just then the oven dinged and the muffins were ready