I am mid thirties and past the bar room thing, I am past quick romances and having my heart stolen by a beautiful face or pair of boobs or a nice ass. I am approaching middle age and on a career path at last, still my heart is lonely and I still believe miss right is out there for me. Most nights I can rationalize my solitary predicament, in fact I often embrace it. However all it takes is one romantic movie or one sexy Hollywood starlet and my juices start to flow. I will not lie, I have ways of satisfying myself but come on, a real woman in the throws of passion is so much more enjoyable. Actually there is no comparison. So why can I only find losers and bitches? I am average in height and weight, fit but not a jock; I have great complexion and hair and am quite the looker if my Mother is any indication. I dress for success and I have fine taste in wine and food, I am a catch, or so it would seem. How come I am only hooking up with losers? That is it, tonight I sit and write down my pros and con's, and perhaps the answer will jump out at me. From the desk drawer I take out a piece of fine stationary, after all I am with the best person I know and she deserves the finest. Half an hour later I have a blank piece of paper with two lines on it, Pro and Con. "Fuck this, pardon my French I say out loud and head to the bathroom. I take a long hot shower, not a bath because I know where that will end up. I do my makeup and hair and put on my best scent In the bedroom I fuss over an outfit for twenty minutes, it is Saturday night and I need to look classy but not over dressed. I decide on a casual animal print dress cut low and breezy but not overtly sexy. Sandals? Yes sandals I think, I am five foot six and the height factor should be diminished by flats. I look in the mirror and adjust my bra, my dress and my hair and then say screw it, I am who I am, take me or leave me. There are only a few lesbian bars in Denver, so I head to the most low key one. It is a piano bar with classy decor and low lights. The atmosphere is
delightful and understated. I am not a fan of loud music or drug induced dancing, so it suits me fine. Inside I notice a tuck and rolled booth available on the back wall and headed there. I am about to sit when two other women make their move on the same booth. My first instinct is to concede to them but before I can say anything, the brunette smiles and says, "Can we join you in your booth, or would you like to join us?" I was caught so off guard by her comment I found myself speechless but gave out a loud giggle, I immediately saw the irony of her words. She gave me a
great big smile in return and stuck her hand out to introduce herself as Rose Marie, after I shook her hand she said "this is Sarah." I shook her had as well noting she was very lovely, her short blonde hair could not be cuter. Sarah slid in the back of the booth, I took one side and Rose Marie took the other. "Are you from Denver," she queried? "Oh my yes, born and raised, how about you?" Rose Marie took a few beats and after a look at Sarah announced they were in town from San Francisco. My mind raced, the city girls on the west coast were so much more progressive, I felt suddenly behind the curve. My sheltered upbringing began to show as I drew quiet. I could only imagine how wild their sex lives must be, after all San Francisco has such loose morals and is so open. "You never gave us your name?" I sat there stunned and embarrassed, my face flushed before I blurted out,Linda". The whole time I was imagining Rose Marie and Sarah in the throws of passion, they were both quite appealing. Sarah is out here to see her sister get married and I decided to tag along. I felt some relief I was not with a couple but wished inside it was Sarah tagging along; I would make a play for her in a heartbeat. She had straight
short blonde hair, held back from her face by her ears. She had those cute
little elf like ears and full lips as well as many other obvious assets. "We are having dirty martinis, ok with you?" Before I could react she was up and off to the bar. Frankly I was not concerned about what I was going to drink, my heart was going pity pat for Sarah. "So Sarah what do you do back in San Francisco? I nearly blushed just asking her a question direct to her face. "I am a massage therapist." Please no I thought to myself, the last visual I need right now is Sarah giving me a massage. "That's nice, are you and Rose Marie a couple?" I boldly threw it out there. "Nah, just good friends, well..." She let the sentence trail off. What to do, I desperately needed to know the rest of that sentence. Here goes nothing. "You had an affaire but ended up friends?" Sarah flushed a bit before answering. "Something like that , we still stay close but are definitely not a couple." Just then Rose Marie came back balancing three large Martini glasses, which she distributed with a mischievous smile. Once she settled back in next to
Sarah she raised her glass and we toasted, "To Denver and new friends." As Rose Marie sipped her drink, I noticed the peach lipstick on the rim of the glass, heaven help me I can not resist a feminine woman, what my more masculine sisters see in each other I am eluded by. The liquor went down nice, a but of a kick on the first sip but the overall effect was to warm my whole body and I felt my nerves calm down quite a bit. "What is this, it is delicious?" "Gilby's and a hint of vermouth, a splash of olive juice and three olives, I had to over see the mix." Rose smiled with satisfaction, and sampled her potion once more to assure herself it was perfect. "Mmmm, I replied. Rose Marie took her hand and tucked Sara's hair back behind her ear, a subconscious motion, from someone who had been intimate for awhile. Sarah seemed to go a bit ridged when she did it, turning to me and asking, "What do you do Linda?" "I am a legal secretary and working ever so slowly on my law degree." Rose was first to respond. "So we will soon have a lawyer in our circle of friends, sweet." Sarah seemed to go quiet, almost as if Rose Marie had stolen her thunder. "I am in your circle of friends?" I smiled and layed it out there. "Of course, so far you are our first friend in Denver, we scored big." Again Rose had her glass in the air for a toast. We clinked glasses and sipped our drink, Rose moved in tighter to Sarah and she noticeably moved a bit in my direction, her thigh was now resting against mine. My breathing became shallow for a moment before I spoke. "Sarah says she is a massage therapist, what do you do Rose Marie?' "Rose, please, Rose Marie takes too long to say." I smiled and nodded. "I am an internet entrepreneur, I run a web business." "Really how exciting what do you sell? Wait let me guess." I subconsciously placed a finger to my chin, a habit from school when I was asked a question, it gave me time to pause and think. I was so distracted with Sarah's leg next to mine, I decided to go with silly, "French post cards from the forties!" Sarah's face lit up and she turned to Rose, they both sat there with their mouths open. "What, I was being silly, what?" I had said something that freaked them out. "Ok , wow that is uncanny, I sell erotic lesbian literature and memorabilia and I do sell antique lesbian post cards, not authentic but made to look aged from classic pictures of the thirties and forties." Now it was my turn to gasp, "Seriously, I was trying to be funny, I almost said strapon's." I made a stab at laughing. We all burst out laughing, somehow a barrier was down and we were instant friends. It was my turn to replenish our drinks, so I asked Rose which bartender she had trained so we could repeat the recipe. "The one with the big boobs." She blurted it out and we all laughed again, apparently we were on the topic of sex and everything was going to be loaded with innuendo from here on out. I sat at the bar while I caught the bartenders attention, she did indeed have ample boobs, accentuated by the tuxedo shirt and its ruffled front. Rose
said she taught you to make her martini's can you give us a repeat performance, they are just yummy?" She smiled and acknowledged my order but was too busy to stop and chat. I sat there and turned my body half around so I could see my new friends. Rose was speaking to Sarah and subconsciously touched her hair again, this time Sarah batted her hand away. There was something going on between them,
I got as hint of lovers quarrel. I waited for the drinks and tried to get my head screwed on straight again, I had come out tonight with no expectations, short of some companionship and sightseeing, I needed to keep that in mind, no matter how beautiful Sarah was. The last thing I need is a lovers spat, they will work it out with out interference from me I thought. The drinks came and I paid the tab giving boobzilla a juicy tip, which rewarded me with a wide inviting smile. I returned it and balanced the three glasses in my hands and headed back to the table. They were both all smiles as I sat the drinks down, if I had not turned around at the bar, I would never have known there was friction. We toasted again to erotica and lesbians in particular. "So tell me about that, the stuff you sell?" Rose immediately took out a business card and handed it to me. I glanced at the card and there was a line drawing of a woman with flowing hair, outlining the card, a hint of breast and thigh formed the rest of the image, a woman lying back with flowing hair and Rose Marie had her information artfully filling in the blank space. "What a beautiful card." "Thank you, it is the logo from the web site, I could not resist using it on my card, it's all about the brand you know." "It is quite artistic, who designed it?" In the dim light I could see Sarah flush slightly, "Don't tell me, Sarah this is extraordinary." She gave me an embarrassed smile and a soft "Thanks." "She is so talented, I keep telling her she is missing her calling, but she will not listen." Sarah shot her eyes toward the table, not comfortable with all the adoration. I quickly raised my glass and toasted, "To the artist amongst us may she adorn the world with errotica." I touched glasses with Rose, then turned to Sarah, who met my eyes and her baby blues opened a portal to her soul, I felt them draw me in to her inner
sanctum. There was no doubt she had just invited me into her private world, begged me really. I had trouble just clinking glasses and then choked a little when I took my sip. It was such an intimate moment; I had never before felt such a strong unspoken connection. Sarah leaned over immediately to pat my back and help me recover from my coughing fit. She handed me her bar napkin and left one hand resting on my arm. This did not help my choking; I was beside myself with lust. After I gained my control back, I decided to drill deeper. The drink had begun to take its toll and the world be damned, I had to find out where this relationship was at, I was willing to come up empty but not with out a fight. "What else did you design for Rose?" I turned my body toward Sarah for the first time, confident now that she was receptive to my advances. "Oh I have a line of line drawing cards, Rosie forced me to release, they sell ok, but I am uncomfortable selling my work, it sort of robs the personality of my work." She sipped her drink before continuing, Rose had a look of disappointment on her face, much like a mother wanting more from her child. "I do these drawings to reflect the feelings in my soul and to sell them seems very impersonal." It hit me right then, the drawings were for Rose Marie and she somehow commercialized Sarah's intimate feelings. This was a betrayal of trust and romance to Sarah; she could not have been clearer in her choice of words. I was over my head, this couple had some serious unresolved issues, who am I to get in the middle? I decided to finish this drink and be on my way. Just then I felt Sarah's hand on my knee, clasping it, more clinging to it for support. All I could do was turn to Rose to see her reaction. She could
not see Sarah's hand but had no need to, their connection was unspoken, they had a long relationship and it was on the rocks. There was a tear in the corner of Roses eye, she had betrayed Sarah and would never be able to recapture their love. It must have been a very passionate relationship that now was over but they could not break the ties that bind and put it to rest. I felt like a side car on a motorbike, there was nothing for me to do but just sit and try and gracefully disengage from the situation. Then it happened, Rose broke out in tears and stood up running for the bathroom. I began to stand and follow as a reflex but Sarah held my leg and her eyes pleaded with me not to. I looked in her eyes and again she drew me in, past the outside world and into her inner sanctum. She was begging me to take her away from this. The idea of Rose tagging along was a bad one and just having someone on your arm at the wedding was not worth it, Sarah had realized it all too late. "I took a chance, I let Sarah past my barred doorway and into my parlor for a chat. "Sarah, I am helpless here, it is obvious she adores you; I can't
get in the middle of that. I am afraid I must leave, however, I would be lying if I did not tell you I am so attracted to you, I could just scream." I watched her eyes plead with me, and then come to a decision, the grip on my leg released. I quickly did something rash before departing, I scribbled my address and phone number on the napkin from my drink and looked back into her eyes. "I wish our timing had been better." I turned and walked away just as a tear moistened her eyes. It was the longest walk of my life from the booth to the door and out into the warm night air outside where I could finally draw a breath.