Cockatoo

By FMNA

Published on Nov 1, 2016

Transgender

Cockatoo Part 31

Nikkie Silk

Previously in Cockatoo: Jamie and Nin had made it back to Koh Samui after their journey to Bangkok to warn Kritsada. Jamie, Alex and Shane had sailed to the West Coast for a short vacation where Jamie and Shane had made love. The trio had sailed back and were in Cockatoo where they were attacked. Pao had stepped between Jamie and the attacker and been stabbed.

There was pandemonium inside Cockatoo in the moments after Pao had been stabbed. As I cradled her in my arms I felt detached from what was going on around me; as if I was watching a film made with a shaky handheld camera. People were either running around yelling, or crying, or frozen to the spot, hands over their mouths wide and eyed with shock. I watched as Shane pinned the attacker down and hit him so hard the man's head bounced off the floor. I could hear Areeya shouting at somebody on her phone, and I saw Alex out of the corner of my eye kicking the attacker as he lay groaning on the floor. She was crying and calling him names in English and Thai as she kicked him again and again. Nin tried to stop her but Alex managed to get one last kick in before she was finally dragged away. Two big Kiwis who had been drinking in the bar held him down.

I held my hands over the wound in Pao's side, but the blood was seeping through my fingers. Someone handed me a bar towel which I folded and pressed hard against the wound. She winced and I could see the pain in her eyes as she looked up at me. She was bleeding heavily and the bar towel was soon soaked with her blood. She groaned softly, her eyelids flickered and then closed.

Don't you fucking dare.' I said. I'm not going to let you die.'

I closed my eyes and prayed, pleading with any God who might be listening to help keep her alive. Nin fell to her knees next to me, said that the police and medics were on the way and pressed her hands over mine to try to staunch the bleeding. My hands were already slippery with Pao's blood, and I was finding it difficult to hold the bar towel against the wound. Shane knelt down beside me, `Mate, let me take over now.' He pulled off his t-shirt and throwing away the bar towel pressed the shirt against the wound which was still bleeding heavily.

Get these people moved back,' he said to Nin, the medics will need space when they get here.' There was now a crowd standing gawking at us and Nin shouted at them to get back, but nobody moved. She jumped up, waved her bloodied hands at them and with Areeya's help managed to push them back.

Somebody thankfully turned off the bar's sound system, and I heard the wail of a siren in the distance. Shane asked for some clean towels as his shirt was now soaked, and one of the bargirls brought some through from the back. Pao was still alive, but her breathing was laboured and it was obvious she needed help quickly. Two medics forced their way through the crowd and Areeya told them what had happened. One of them took over from Shane and the other motioned for me to move away. I shook my head; I didn't want to leave her. Alex knelt down and put her hand on my arm. `You need to let them do their jobs, we're in the way now.'

I stood up and started to run towards her attacker who was still groaning on the floor being watched by the two Kiwis. I felt completely calm, and I was going to kill him with my bare hands. Shane grabbed me, `Mate, don't do it, she needs you now, he isn't going anywhere.' Alex grabbed me too and between them they pulled me back and pushed me up against a wall.

Shane went to help to the medics who were struggling to get an IV line into Pao, and with his assistance they managed to do it. With one of the medics holding a pad over the wound they slid her onto a stretcher and into the ambulance which screamed away, sirens blaring and lights flashing. Shane came over and said she was still breathing so there was hope. Areeya flagged down a taxi and bundled Alex and I into it, saying that she and Shane would deal with the police. We rode in silence as the taxi driver hurtled between the tuk-tuks and the motorcycles with his hand permanently on the horn.

Alex was sobbing softly, and I took her hand and said, She'll be alright, she'll pull through this.' I prayed once more that I would be right. Alex's phone bleeped, and she talked briefly to someone in Thai. That was Areeya,' she said, `The police have arrived and arrested the guy. She's also called her father who is flying the surgeon who treated you over to Samui on the company plane.' If Pao could survive that long, I knew she would be in good hands.

The taxi driver took the last corner almost on two wheels and pulled up in front of the same hospital where I had been treated after the pirate attack. We jumped out of the taxi and hurried into the reception to be told Pao was already in the emergency room. We were getting some wary looks from people and I realised my hands and face were caked in blood. Alex dragged me into the restroom and we tried to wash the blood off. My trousers and top were streaked with blood as well, but we could do nothing about that for the moment. We hugged each other without saying anything; holding onto each other because we didn't know what else to do.

`Who was he? You recognised him, didn't you?' She was weeping now.

`He was one of the guys who held us up on the way to Bangkok. I recognised him at the last moment. I thought he was going for Shane, but it was me he wanted and then Pao moved in front of me. She did it deliberately, Alex. She did it for me.'

Alex looked stunned, `Oh God, no. It's all my fault.' She said as her shoulders slumped and she began to cry.

What do you mean?' I said and grabbed her as her knees buckled. We both sank to the floor, and I held her tight as she sobbed on my shoulder. Tears were streaming down her face and she was struggling to breathe. Eventually, she managed to catch her breath and said, This wouldn't have happened if I hadn't come up with the idea of sending you to Bangkok.'

Alex, that's not true. Nobody could have foreseen what would happen. It's not your fault.' I put my face close to hers and looked into her tear-filled eyes. You can't blame yourself for what this guy did. It happened because some little shit on the ferry decided to steal whatever had been put into my bag. He's the one to blame, not you, or me, or Areeya. He made this happen. We were in the wrong place at the wrong time.'

She nodded, but I guessed she wouldn't stop feeling guilty for a long time. I hugged her again. `Right now, it's Pao who needs us most.'

Alex looked up, tried to smile and kissed me.

`What was that for?' I said.

I don't know what I would do without you.' She hugged me tight, and I felt her trembling, so I held her and stroked her hair until she stopped shaking. I kissed her and helped her up. Let's go see if there's any news.' We held hands as we walked back into reception just as Shane, Nin and Areeya walked in. Areeya went straight to Alex and wrapped her arms around her and they both burst into tears. I looked at Shane and knew that he had told Areeya who the attacker was.

She's blaming herself I guess?' I said quietly to Shane. He nodded, and I said, Alex too, I tried to tell her it wasn't her fault, but I think it will take time for them to feel different.'

`Have they told you anything yet about Pao?'

I shook my head. 'Only that she's in the ER and they're working on her.' He put his arms around me and hugged me. I laid my head on his chest and he stroked my back. I looked up at him, and without thinking about it, kissed him on the lips and said, `Shane, you're wonderful, do you know that?'

Before he could say anything, a doctor pushed through the doors into reception and walked across to us. I felt everyone tense themselves, and Nin reached out for my hand as Shane held the other. Areeya put her arm around Alex as the doctor approached us.

He was wearing blood soaked scrubs and I think we all steeled ourselves for the worst. He noticed us looking and said something in Thai. Nin translated, He says sorry for not cleaning up first but thought we would want to hear news quickly.' The doctor looked tired and rubbed his face as he paused, making me think the worst was about to happen. He went on, his face not showing any emotion, He says our friend alive but very ill.' You could feel the relief from everyone as the doctor paused again. `We stop the bleeding eventually but she lost a lot of blood and is very weak. Next few hours are critical. We hope there no infection. She in intensive care now. We will let you know what happens.'

He turned and went back through the doors. We looked at each other, not sure what to do or say. I went over to Alex and Areeya and hugged them both. I could feel them both trembling and I whispered, `Pao's a tough girl, if anyone can beat this she will.' Areeya was weeping and Alex put her arms around her and nodded to me to give them some time together. I went over to Shane and Nin and hugged them too. Nin started to cry and Shane wrapped her up in his arms as she sobbed on his chest. I walked over to a chair and sat down, my head in my hands, feeling tired as the adrenaline rush drained away. Shane came and sat down next to me.

I've sent Nin to fetch something to drink.' I nodded, Good idea, I'm sure we could all do with something.'

`How are you doing, Jamie?' He asked gently.

`Just holding on, I think.'

He put his arm around me and I lay my head on his shoulder. It felt nice to have someone hold me at that moment. I looked up at him. `What did you tell the police?'

`Areeya told them it was a bar fight gone bad. They believed it OK. Plenty of witnesses to back it up. She kept our names out of it.'

`What was it all about? Why did he try to attack me?'

Shane was silent for a moment. `My guess is that his bosses were pissed off that he screwed up with the drug delivery, if that's what it was. Either they ordered him to take some revenge, or he did it on his own to save some face.'

`So they might try again?'

Maybe,' he said, but these guys are pragmatic, and will probably call it a day. This guy will be out of action for a long time. But we should be careful for a while.'

I nodded, but I wasn't exactly overjoyed by the thought.

Nin came back with bottles of water and we sat quietly for a while, each of us thinking what we might have done differently. I said, `We don't all have to wait here, we don't know how long it will be before we get any news. Why don't some of us go and get some rest. I'll wait here with someone and I'll call if there's any news.' Alex and Areeya flatly refused to leave, so Shane and Nin agreed to go back to the apartment to get some rest. We promised that we would call the moment we heard anything.

The three of us settled down on chairs, and it wasn't long before my eyelids felt heavy and despite my desperate attempts to stay awake, I dozed off. I don't know how I slept before I felt someone shaking me and I opened my eyes to find Areeya standing over me.

`Has something happened?'

Nothing yet,' she said, but there's someone here to see us.'

I looked around and standing talking to Alex was Doctor Wichasak who had treated me after I was shot. She had obviously arrived from Bangkok on Kritsada's plane. Rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I walked across with Areeya.

She turned to look at me with a frown before speaking to Alex and Areeya `I didn't think I would be seeing you two so soon again. How's James doing? Is he still here on Samui?'

`Yes, I'm still here, Doctor.' I said, and she looked at me with shock.

`it's a long story, and I'll tell you if you want, but how's Pao?'

She recovered her composure, but with a sideways glance at me said, `You know she's still very sick. They did a fine job when they got her in but she had lost a lot of blood and it took time for them to stop the bleeding. We're not sure if there's still any internal bleeding and there always the risk of infection. One of our problems is that your friend has a rare blood type amongst Thai people. We are getting blood sent over but we have low stocks right now.'

My ears pricked up, `Doctor, I'm O rhesus negative, I think that means my blood can be given to anyone, is that right?'

She nodded, `Yes, that's right.'

`Then can I give some for you to use?'

`Of course, that would be very helpful. Come with me.' She took me through to a cubicle and arranged for a nurse to set up the equipment to take my blood. I lay on a bed as the nurse put a needle in my arm and began to let the blood flow. I had given blood in the UK many times so I knew how it worked, and it gave me some comfort to think that I could play a part in Pao's treatment. I had felt so helpless knowing that she had moved in front of me to take the attack. Tears began to flow as I thought of her lying on a bed, fighting for her life because of me. The tears made the nurse nervous, and she called Doctor Wichasak into the cubicle.

`What's up James? Does it hurt?'

`No, no, that's fine. I'm happy to help anyway I can. It's just, well, she did it to protect me.'

`James, I don't understand. It was a bar fight wasn't it?'

I shook my head, and briefly told her the story of Nin and I carrying the message to Kritsada, why I was dressed as I was, how we were ambushed and how Pao had deliberately moved in front of me when the attacker came for me. `James, I had no idea. Kritsada just said it had been a bar fight, and he wanted the best treatment for Pao. He and I go back a long time and I'm happy to do the odd favour for him when he asks.'

I wondered what the relationship was between the Doctor and Kritsada. Being flown over to Samui in the middle of the night didn't sound like a small favour to me at all. By the way she spoke it seemed perhaps to be more than a professional relationship. She took my hand and said, Pao is in good hands and we'll do everything we can for her. The blood you've just given will be very useful.' She paused, looking down at me, I guess I've never met anyone with the same talent for getting into trouble as you, James.' She smiled, and I had to smile back.

`Not something I try to do, Doctor.'

While you're here and at my mercy, let me check that wound of yours.' She pushed up my top and traced her fingers across the scar on my front and then the exit wound at the back. They look fine, healing nicely. I did a good job if I say so myself.' She looked down at me with a frown. `And you're all OK with this?' She said, waving her hand down my clothes.

I blushed, `Well, yes, now. I wasn't at first, but somehow I got used to it.'

`You're a remarkable person, James. I thought that when you survived the pirate attack, but I'm even more convinced of it now. Kritsada tells me you're going to be doing some work for him in Bangkok.'

I nodded, and she paused before saying, `A word of warning, James. Bangkok can be a dangerous place. With your talent for finding trouble, you should be careful. I know him very well, James, but I would say be especially careful where Kritsada is concerned. When you're back in Bangkok give me a call, we can talk more over dinner.' She pressed her hand on mine and then left saying she would let us know if anything changed with Pao. I wondered once more about how close was the relationship between the doctor and Kritsada. I walked back into the reception to find Alex and Areeya asleep, with Alex's head resting on Areeya's shoulder. I sat on a chair and watched the pair of them sleeping, wishing I could magic away the guilt they were feeling before inevitably, sleep claimed me too.

I am back in Bangkok, sitting in the bar where I had met Jandaeng. I look into the mirror behind the bar to see I am dressed like all the bar girls there; a small black bikini top and panties, and my long black hair cascading down over my shoulders framing my perfectly made-up face. I can see my breasts spilling out of the tiny bikini top and my nipples are poking through the thin material. I smile at my reflection in the mirror and the bar girl next to me giggles, kisses me and puts her hand down the front of my bikini panties. I feel her hand rubbing my clit before sliding a finger into my already wet pussy, making me squirm on the bar chair. Our tongues flick at each other, and as she fingers my pussy, I slide my hand down into her panties and find a hard little cock which I begin to stroke.

I open my eyes to see Shane walk into the bar wearing blood streaked military fatigues, and he stands there silently watching the two of us making out. I turn back to the bar girl to see Nin sitting there, and she pushes me towards Shane. I grab his hand and lead him through the bar towards the rooms at the back. Looking back over my shoulder I see his eyes fixed on my ass, so I give it an extra wiggle as my heels click clack across the floor. I take him through the bead curtain into the back and open the first door. It swings open to reveal Doctor Wichasak on her knees, naked and noisily sucking Kritsada's cock. He looks at me, grins and waves for me to come in, but I shake my head, close the door and drag Shane to the next room.

The second door opens into a room where the journalist Tony is naked and bent over a table, still wearing the cock cage, being fucked by Inspector Jandaeng in his police uniform complete with his mirror aviators. Jandaeng sees me and makes the shape of a gun with his hand and points it at me. I slam the door quickly and move on to the next. The third door opens and Pao is in there wearing the Chakkri dress Areeya gave her, looking at me with such a sweet smile. But as I try to enter the room, the door swings shut in my face, and however hard I bang my fists on the door, it won't open. The fourth room is empty so I pull Shane inside, wrap my arms around his neck, and pull him down to kiss him, my tongue plunging into his mouth. He doesn't respond, and I pull away, confused and scared.

He lays some money down on a table beside the bed and allows me to undress him. I strip off the dirty battle dress he's wearing, and I can see fresh scars on his chest. As I run my fingers over them he winces with pain. He's dusty and dirty, as if he has just come from a combat mission. I pick up a washcloth and as gently as I can, wash the dirt and dust from his body, taking care as I clean the scars. I dry him with a towel and still he stands there, silent and motionless.

He now stands naked except for his dog tags, his cock standing straight out in front of him. I reach behind me to unhook my bikini and my breasts tumble free, the nipples hardening as I caress and pinch them while he watches, unsmiling and unmoving. Dropping to my knees I take him in my mouth, my eyes looking up at him and I am frightened by the sadness I see in his face. His cock grows as I slide my lips and tongue around it, licking and sucking the head as my fingers stroke the shaft. I love this feeling of a cock hardening in my mouth pulsing and twitching, filling my mouth as it grows. Cupping his balls in my fingers I squeeze and feel him grow even harder, his eyes locked on mine as his cock fucks my eager mouth. I feel his hands on the back of my head, forcing me to take him deeper and deeper, but I don't gag and I manage to deep throat him, my nose touching his pubic hair.

My pussy is wet and tingling with the need to have him inside me, to have him fuck me until I can take no more. I let his cock slip from my mouth and I lie on my back on the bed, and I slide my bikini panties over my legs and kick them off. I spread my legs for him and he watches as I stroke my hard little clit before licking one of my fingers and driving it into my pussy. Shane's face unmoved by what he sees, and as I begin to think he will never respond, he climbs onto the bed and positions himself between my legs, his huge cock red and angry looking. He moves forward and I guide him into my pussy with my fingers. I'm so wet the head slips easily inside me, and I moan as I feel him fill me up, his cock as hard as a steel rod. I wrap my legs around his back and lock my ankles together as he begins to slide in and out, making me gasp every time he plunges into me.

He pounds into me as if he's trying to relieve all his stress and anger in this one fuck. I feel his cock, so hot and hard, sliding in and out of my pussy. Ii makes me arch my back and hiss with pleasure as I push back onto him, rubbing my clit at the same time. He leans forward and we kiss, his tongue fighting with mine. My fingernails dig into his back and he winces, and I do it again, and again, until he grabs my hands and holds them down. I feel so vulnerable like this, helpless to move and at his mercy, yet it thrills me to my core. I bite one of his nipples and he grunts and drives his cock even harder into my willing pussy. He teases me by pulling his cock out and then driving back into me, pushing me up the bed until my head strikes the wall. I feel empty every time his cock slips out, and then he fills me up once more, making me squeal with the force of each thrust. We rut like animals, fast and hard, sweat dripping from both of us; becoming the beast with two backs.

He lifts my legs high in the air and that lets him drive even deeper into me, and I'm dizzy with lust and desire as my climax begins to build. I feel him grow harder and he's grunting now as he crashes into me. I hold back my orgasm until I sense his climax approach, and we come together, smashing our bodies against each other as the strength of my orgasm crashes through my body, making me scream as I almost black out with its power. He shudders once and then pumps and pumps his cum into me, and I can feel my juices mixed with his cum slipping past my pussy lips and down my thighs. He pulls out, and I feel so empty as his cock slips from me. He looks down at me and smiles for the first time, then kisses me gently on the lips. Pulling off his dog tags he places them gently round my neck. As he does this, he begins to fade in front of my eyes and I watch helplessly as he melts away like mist in the morning sun. I begin to shout, `No, no, no.'

Wake up, Jamie, wake up, you're having a nightmare.' I blinked open my eyes to see Alex looking down at me with a worried look on her face. You were shouting. I had to wake you up.'

`I'm OK, thanks,' I said, rubbing my hands over my face and then I remembered the dream, 'Has anything happened, where's Shane?'

Alex frowned, `No, nothing's happened, and Shane's back at the flat with Nin, don't you remember?'

`Oh, yes, sorry, I forgot.'

`What were you dreaming about, baby? It seemed to be something very bad.'

`Oh, you know dreams, can't remember them even straight afterwards.' I don't think she believed me, but she gave me a hug. I always thought Alex could see straight through me. Areeya was still sleeping on the chair, her head slumped onto her chest.

Should we wake her?' I said, What's the time, anyway?'

Alex glanced at her watch, It's just gone seven o'clock. Yes, I think we could all do with something to drink and eat. I'll call Shane to tell him what's going on.' She paused and looked at me from the corner of her eye, Unless you want to speak to him, that is.'

`OK, I'll do it.' After my dream I needed to hear his voice.

Alex was shaking Areeya awake and said over her shoulder, `Can you ask Shane or Nin to fetch us some clothes, we all look terrible.' It was true, Alex and Areeya looked like refugees, and I could only imagine I looked worse. I called Shane, and it rang a few times before Shane came on, sounding as if he had just woken up.

I said quickly, There's no news yet, sorry to wake you up, are you OK?' Yeah, I'm good, thanks. Look, how are you, Jamie?'

`Glad to hear your voice.' Happy that he couldn't see me blushing as I said it.

`That's nice, babe, I'm glad to hear yours too. How are Alex and Areeya?'

They're hanging in there, but can you or Nin do us a favour?' Sure babe, what is it?'

`Can you bring us in some fresh clothes, we all need a change over here.'

`I'll get NIn onto it. Er, what kind of clothes should we bring for you?'

I smiled to myself. `Some shorts and a t-shirt will do. Oh, a pair of trainers please, my feet are killing me.'

Shane laughed, `OK, babe will do. We'll be there shortly.'

He hung up, and I closed my eyes for a moment to try to get my thoughts together. The dream had shaken me badly. What was it all about? I was a woman in the dream, what the hell did that mean? I shivered as I recalled what had happened. Did any of it mean anything? Or was it just a mash-up of my fears and fantasies running wild in my head?

`Earth calling Jamie. Are you with us?' Alex was looking at me with a worried frown.

`Sorry, sorry, miles away. They're coming with some fresh clothes.'

Are you OK, Jamie?' said Areeya, in between yawns. You look very pale.'

Bad dream, Areeya.' She nodded, but didn't ask any more. Alex put her arm through mine and we walked a few steps away from Areeya, You're shivering,' she said, `Is it the dream you had? Do you want to talk about it?'

`Not right now, Alex. Maybe later. I'm tired and hungry right now and I want to change my clothes.'

She put her arms around me and kissed me gently, `OK, sweetheart, I love you, you know that don't you?'

Alex, I love you too, more than ever.' We hugged each other for a while, until Areeya said, Shane and Nin are here.'

They had brought changes of clothes and we gratefully headed off to the washrooms to change. The girls changed quickly and left, but I lingered, glad for a moment to myself. I looked in the mirror and was shocked to see what I looked like. I shuddered as I saw a gaunt, tear streaked face looking back; eyes red with fatigue and dark bags forming beneath them. I also needed a shave but that would have to wait. I looked like shit and felt worse. Not for the first time in the past few days, I wondered what I had got myself into. Who was I now? James? Jamie or Scarlett? Did the dream really mean I wanted to be a woman?

I looked once more in the mirror looking to see if the answer was written in my face, but there was nothing there to help. I had enjoyed being Jamie, and even Scarlett for that matter, with some exceptions. What I couldn't answer was who did I really want to be? Where did Shane fit into everything? I liked him. I really liked him, but I didn't love him; I loved Alex and Areeya, pure and simple. That made me laugh, my life had stopped being simple from the moment I arrived on Samui. I took one more look at myself in the mirror and thought these questions would have to wait.

I carefully removed the wig and washed the remaining makeup from my face. Stripping off the black top and trousers, I stuffed them into a waste bin. I would never wear them again, however clean the laundry might be able to get them. Nin had put a pair of shorts and a t-shirt along with a pair of boat shoes into a bag for me. I had to smile as I pulled out a pair of lacy panties she had included. It was either wear them or go commando; so I pulled the panties up my legs and shivered as I felt them nestle around my balls. I finished dressing, took a deep breath and walked out to join the others.

Shane began to say something when Just as Doctor Wichasak walked into the room. She held up her hands as all of us started to speak at once. I have come to tell you that we have stabilised your friend. We are pretty sure that we have stopped the bleeding which was our biggest worry. We are keeping her sedated so that she can have the best chance to recover.' She nodded to me, Just as we did with you James. I hope the worst is over, but your friend was, and still is, very ill. We have had to give her a lot of blood, including that from James. If you want, I can let you see her, two at a time for a few minutes. Remember, we are not there yet, but things are improving.'

You could almost touch the sense of relief in the room as the doctor finished speaking. Areeya said Alex and I should go first, and the others nodded. Alex reached out for my hand as we followed the doctor through to the Intensive Care ward. She pulled back a screen, and I felt Alex squeeze my hand as we saw Pao surrounded by machines, with a breathing tube in her mouth and hooked up to a couple of drips. She looked so small and frail as she lay there, and I felt tears pricking in the corners of my eyes. All I could think of was Pao stepping in front of me, and how after she had been stabbed, she had looked up at me and said, `Sorry, Mr James.' I felt Alex's shoulder begin to shake, and I knew she was crying. I put my arm around her and pulled her tight.

We left the ward and the other three crept in and spent a few minutes there too, and I hoped that somehow Pao could feel the love that we had for her. Shane and Nin stayed at the hospital this time whilst Alex, Areeya and I went back to the apartment. We slumped onto the sofa, barely able to talk to each other. `We need to get some sleep. We're not doing anyone any good like this.' I said and pulled them both to their feet. I lead them to the bed and we laid down, still in our clothes, and hugged each other until, one by one, we slid off to sleep.

The buzzing of my phone woke me and I grabbed it, thinking it was Shane or Nin, with news from the hospital. I eased myself away from Alex, who had her arm draped over me, and walked out onto the balcony. Yawning, I answered the call and almost staggered as I heard the unmistakable voice of Jandaeng on the line.

To be continued

Thanks to my very good friend Abigail for proofing this episode XXX

Please let me know what you thought of the story nikkie.silk@outlook.com

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Next: Chapter 32


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