Again, this is a story about gay relationships so 1. if you are breaking the law, underage, or just hate gay stuff don't read any further. The World Wide Web is a big place so you can find something else. 2. The story is not based on any real person place thing, or another person's idea. So any similarities are pure chance. 3. Since this story is of my own creation, I have the copyright to it. No other postings, except at nifty, are allowed. Nor is the selling of the story to others permitted. Any questions about the above, please write.
Enjoy
JMH
trandar2002@yahoo.com
"David... can we talk?" Nathan begged as he rested his head on the door.
"What is there to talk about?"
"We need to talk about us."
"Really... like there has ever been an "us"?"
"Please David... we need to talk."
"Alright... it's not like our door has a lock on it," David said with a lot of sarcasm. When David and Nathan first started sharing the room, they would lock each other out all the time so it was not long before uncle Mike took out his tools and removed it.
"David..." Nathan asked looking for him on David's side of the room.
"I'm over here," David called out from Nathan's bed.
"Why are you on my bed?"
"Cause I have always done that when I felt lonely and you were not around. You didn't know that... did you," David said as more of a fact then question.
"No I didn't." Nathan admitted.
"Your bed always has your smell... at least after the sheets have been on for a while. I could rest in your bed and imagine you were here with me."
Nathan walked over and sat at the foot of his bed, looking down at David. "You are really in love with me."
"Yes I am. I know I have not right to expect you to love me in return. I didn't even expect you to know how I feel, as I have never told you. I just wished you gave me a chance instead of falling for Philip so easily."
"I'm sorry."
"No reason for you to be... you're in love. What kind a person would I be if I demanded that you not feel what you feel?"
"I do love you David... but as a brother. Us living under the same roof together, me calling your dad my uncle, it is just too much familiarity."
"That is why I have to tell you something," David said with some difficulty.
"What?"
"I'm leaving. I'm going to move in with uncle Glenn and Kyle for a while."
"Why?"
"Because I don't want you to see me as a brother anymore. I want to be your friend or even your lover but you seeming me as your brother interferes with that."
"David... you don't have to go to do that."
"I feel I need to. I need to be away from you for a while and I think you need the same. I have had to sleep in the same room with you for 12 years with a third of them with me wanting to sleep with you. You don't know how many nights I have tossed and turned fighting my urge to join you in your bed."
"David... is there any way I can convince you to stay?"
"Unless you are offering me a marriage proposal then no."
"I can't do that David... not yet. Not when I am trying to figure out who I really am and what I want."
"I know... as I said I need to leave."
"I still don't see why. You can always move into Greg's room."
"I don't know if that would work," David said sadly.
"Why?"
"Because Nate, I am so wrapped up in loving you I can't see the forest from the trees. You and I might never become a couple. I can live with that but right now, with you so close to me, I'm blind to anyone else who might want to spend his life with me. I can't pine away my life thinking one day you will fall in love with me."
"You are right... you deserve more then that."
"Seeing you with Philip just sealed things for me. You're in love, Nathan... finally... but it is not with me. How can I ask you to try and date us both at the same time when you know what it did to your father."
"I know... I can't do that. It would not be fair to you or Philip."
"Yes... and it would not be fair to you either."
"I'm sorry, David. I wish I shared your feelings for me. I know you would be a good person for me to be with."
"I would have treated you real nice... as you deserve," David agreed. "I just hope Philip does so or I will smash his face."
"David!"
"Just joking. With that arm of yours you could do the job yourself."
"Yes... I can take care of myself," Nathan said as he climbed on top of David.
"What are you doing?"
"Giving you what you want," Nathan said as he rested his head on David's chest.
"I want more then this." David sighed as he wrapped his arms around Nathan's back, letting his nose smell his hair.
"I know... I just want you to know that I do love you David."
"Yes... it might be as a brother but I know you love me."
David wished that he were as undressed as Nathan was right now. His hands liked the feel of Nathan's smooth, muscled body. In comparison to Nate, David was a large man, taller, stronger, and hairier. He was like his dad except with a slimmer body. Where his dad had played football, David's sports were baseball and soccer so he was a hard hitter and quick on his feet.
"I wish I could take you with me to Glenn's place but that would defeat the purpose of me getting away from you."
"Well I don't think you really want to get away from me."
"Damn right I don't. It's not about wanting but needing to. I have no idea how I am going to tell dad about this."
"Just don't tell him your leaving cause of me."
"Yep... I know better then that. My dad has wanted me to go out with you for years but your dad would not hear of it."
"How do you know that?"
"Dad told me."
"Mine didn't."
"Well your dad has something known as tact... he would not want you to worry about something that was not really an issue."
"But it is now... you're leaving."
"It will be a good thing. I'll come by a lot and if you can spare a moment from your new boyfriend we can talk."
"He's not my boyfriend yet."
"By your standards maybe but to most normal people the two of you are now a couple."
"I guess so. I will have to tell dad now," Nathan said in a tired voice.
"Why...?"
"Cause I never keep secrets from him."
"Yes but that does not mean you have to tell him everything."
"Well that is what I'm used to doing."
"What about college. Do you plan to tell him everything you do when you are there?"
"No..."
"Then I think you need some practice."
"Ok... but not about Philip. I want my dad's help with him," Nathan said before telling David all he had learned from Philip.
"Yep... dad could help him so I will ask you to keep a different secret. Don't tell dad about you and me," David said.
"Ok... can I know why?"
"Yes... your dad feels as you do... that I should be happy just being your brother. How your dad feels tends to affect you a lot. If I am going to have any chance with you, you need to make the choice on your own cause if you try to get advice from your dad I won't have a chance."
"I understand."
"I don't want you to think I hate your dad. I love him. Many of the things I love about you I can see came from him."
"I know. I guess I am a daddy's boy but I am finding out that even with his love there has been something missing."
"Physical love and bonding?" David asked.
"Yes," Nathan said as he nuzzled up against David's chest.
"Then I should thank Philip," David said as he gave Nathan an extra hard squeeze. "Can I kiss you again?"
"Yes," Nathan said as he climbed up higher on top of David till their lips met.
It was a long kiss and even though there was no tongue involved, it was very sweet for David. Nathan was a kind, trusting, sweet guy that at times made him look naïve or helpless. David knew that Nathan was not as helpless as people assumed but it still fed his need to be protective over him. That was the kind of guy he wanted, someone who would not be averse to leaning on him but not to the extent that David would feel being used like with Thomas. He wanted his man to be a strong man and Nathan was that. So down to the core what David wanted was a strong man who needed to be with another strong man for love, comfort, and support. Surprisingly those were not things that David felt were missing from Nathan's life but his own.
"Nate... I love you," David whispered as Nathan kissed his cheek and neck.
"I know."
"That is why I have to go now. If we keep this up I might want to do more then just snuggle and kiss and you have a guy waiting for you in the other room."
"Ok," Nathan agreed and climbed off top of David.
"Go back to Philip," David said as he got off the bed.
"Can't I help you?"
"You can by going. It will be a lot easier if..."
"If I am are not here," Nathan finished.
"Yes," David sighed.
"Ok," Nathan agreed. He went to his dresser, took out some clothes and left David in peace.
David didn't start packing right away. Instead he laid back down on Nathan's bed, his face smashed against the pillow, trying to capture the smell of Nathan's hair off it. Leaving was going to be so hard but he felt that being away was the only way to free himself of his obsession.
Greg's father had tried to talk with him soon after he had locked himself in his room. The fact that it had not been Josh confirmed his fear that he was going to be stuck here for the long term. All he wanted to do was dig himself into a hole and die. A week ago he felt his life had been perfect... well not perfect. He had a family that took care of him but he lacked a boyfriend or just friends in general.
In the end it became a battle of the stomach verses determination to stay in the room till his father let him out. It was at the point that he was gnawing on his silk pillow cases that there was a knock on the door.
"Leave me alone!" Greg replied.
"Oh come on Greg... it's me, Emily."
"Emily?" Greg said half shocked that she had been able to track him all the way here. He had forgotten to give Nathan the finished sketches, which she had been nagging him about.
Greg rushed to the door, popped it open, saw Emily and a man in his mid 40's. He ignored the man, pulled Emily inside the room and locked the door. "How in the hell did you find me?"
"Well I live here... duh!" She said as it was that obvious.
"What do you mean you live here? I've been to your house."
"You've been to my mother's house... This is where my father lives."
"But I thought your parents were just divorced," Greg said confused.
"Well they are."
"You also said that he lived far away."
"He does... do you have any idea how far this place is from my mom's house."
"You also told me that you never see him," Greg said getting tired of how she was talking around the issue.
"Well I only see him ever other weekend... that's practically never."
Greg fumed on this for a while before another realization hit him. "Your dad is gay?"
"Well he prefers the term homosexual... he likes gay sex, just not gay clothes, clubs, bars, social issues, and such."
"So he is still in the closet?"
"No he's out... he just also a Republican," Emily laughed.
"I guess a lot like dad," Greg said a little sadly... a suspicion growing in his head.
"Stop thinking that way!" Emily said as he hit him on the shoulder.
"What way..."
"I know that look... you think my dad is sleeping with your dad. As far as I'm aware of he's not."
"Wait a minute... how long have you know that this was going to happen!"
"Well that depends on what you are referring to as "what"" Emily said evasively.
"Spill it!" Greg said in a deadly serious tone. He was going to get the truth of how his father ended up here one way or another.
"Ok... if you mean how long have I know that your dad was going to move here. I found that out today. AS to how long your dad has been hanging around my dad and his friends... that is a longer story."
"I have the time... but can you sneak me some food before you start," Greg said as he felt his stomach grumble.
"Oh you wimp. All you have to do is go downstairs and get some of the Tai food my dad brought home for lunch."
"I don't want to run into my dad," Greg pouted.
"Alright... I'll go get you something to eat," Emily said as if she had just been asked to clean a mule stall.
"Ok... can you also see if they have some soda?"
"Why... your room already has some," Emily replied.
"What do you mean?
"This, stupid," Emily said as she dragged him off his bed and took him to the closet. Inside was a mini-fridge stock with bottled water, soda pop, and a few ice cream sandwiches in the icebox."
"You mean to tell me that this stuff has been here the whole time?' Greg groaned as he took out a coke and ice cream sandwich.
"Don't ruin your appetite," Emily said as she took the stuff away from him and handed him a half-liter bottle of water.
"Well then hurry up with the food," Greg said as he went back to his bed.
"Alright," Emily replied, knowing not to push Greg in his present mood.
Greg sucked on his water bottle for the five minutes before Emily came back with two plates of food in one arm.
"You should be a waitress."
"And you should stop being a wimp," Emily said as she handed him a plate.
"I'm not a wimp," Greg said between sucking noodles into his mouth with a pair of chopsticks.
"Yes you are... you let me push you around and live your social life through Nathan."
"Ok... but that is only because I let you push me around."
"And Nathan?"
"Yes I'm dependent on him... he's like my big brother."
"Yeah but the two of you are the same age. Don't you get tired of always being the tag along?"
"No... it's not like Nathan is taking advantage of me."
"No... but you use him as an excuse to not make more friends," Emily said before listing examples switching between her own voice and her best "Greg" one... "Hey Greg, do you want to go to the movies with us...? Ummm no, I am going out with Nathan's friends. Hey Greg, want to watch the basketball game with us...? Ummm no I have to go to Nathan's baseball game."
"I like hanging around Nathan... What is so bad about that?"
"Nothing except he is the only person you want to hang around. He is like a stuffed animal you never outgrew sleeping with."
"Why are you bringing this up?" Greg angrily replied.
"Because Greg... I worry on how you are going to handle life without him."
"What do you mean?"
"Well think about it Greg... Nathan is near the top of his class. With his grades he can get into any school he wants."
"Me... I'll be lucky if a community college takes me."
"You could go to an art school."
"Yeah... if my dad lets me. I was just hoping..."
"Yes?"
"Well I had been hoping that Nathan would go to KU and stay nearby."
"Why would he... he stands a chance of going to Harvard, Yale, or some other top school."
"To be close to his family," Greg said with some defiance.
"Hmmmm... if he was being over emotional and attached he might," Emily agreed. "Nathan is very smart but he can be a little dense when looking out for his own interests."
"If I ask him... he would stay," Greg sighed.
"Yes... but would that be fair to him for you to emotionally blackmail him like that?"
"I know but am I ever to tell him how I feel?"
"Wait... are you in love with Nathan?"
"NO!... I'm not like David. I just love Nathan as a brother."
"WHAT! David is in love with Nathan. He is GAY!" Emily pounced on Greg's slip of the tongue.
"Yeah... I found out a few days ago."
"And he is in love with his brother."
"Well... I think David doesn't see Nathan as a brother."
"Yeah more like a piece of sweet ass."
"No... It is just weird. Nathan always looked out for me, which was ok because I needed him. David though... has always been protective of Nathan even when Nathan did not need his help. I think David has been on love with him for a long time."
"I see... so I guess you still win the messed up family award," Emily sighed.
"My family is not messed up... just complicated," Greg defended.
"Well my family "is" messed up."
"How so?"
"Well... my dad is a fag, my mom is a an alcoholic, my sister can't decide if she is a lesbian or if she is just doing the usual college experimenting and my little brother keeps on trying on my clothes."
"He's only five," Greg chuckled.
"Yeah that is what they all say. The next thing you know is will be wanting an operation and boob implants," Emily said with some disgust.
"Why have not told me any of this?"
"Because I don't want the whole school to know what kind of freaked out family I have."
"Then why are you telling me now?"
"Cause you won't be going to my school anymore... duh!"
"Thanks for reminding me."
"Don't worry you'll enjoy private school... all those boys in uniform."
"Uniforms!"
"Yep!" Emily grinned, enjoying the look of misery on Greg's face. She went to the closet and took out a blue blazer with the school crest on the pocket, a light blue shirt, red tie, and brown pants.
"I have to wear this thing!"
"Yes," Emily said with a wicked grin. "The good point, for you that is, it is an all boys school."
"Great... " Greg said not enthused.
"Aw, come on... take it as a chance to meet new people. You can even go back into the closet if you want as none of them will know that you are gay."
"Thanks but my family raised me better."
"Didn't stop David from hiding in the closet and being popular."
"He is also a jock. Unfortunately all people have to do is look at me and hear my voice and know that I am gay."
"True... but the uniform helps with that."
"Will I have to live there?"
"Nope, some students do live on campus but you live close enough to drive. I saw the BMW your dad got you."
"Yeah... I wonder how he afforded it."
"Well... you might not know this but your uncle Josh was a bit of a tightwad. I heard your dad complaining how Josh wanted everyone to live a "normal" life."
"Well I just thought that since I didn't have a car that dad couldn't afford one."
"Oh he could afford to get you one but your uncle would not let him buy the car he wanted to get you. Uncle Josh felt something more middle class and used should have been your first car."
"Like a Saturn," Nathan laughed.
"Yep... no one knows this but one of my father's friends works at the accounting firm that handle your uncles accounts. Can't you believe that the cheap wad is worth over 23 million dollars?"
"I never knew," Greg said surprised.
"Well he is very rich... could be a member of the Kansas gay mafia."
"The Kansas gay mafia."
"Well its not a real mob... its just a group of the richest gay men in town... your dad's new friends."
"Those are who the other men are?"
"Those guys you saw earlier... nope... those were the house boys."
"House boys! What is my dad doing with a house boy!" Greg said with disgust.
"Well none of them are your dad's. The only guy he is seeing "steady" is Kurt."
"So my dad is cheating on uncle Josh."
"Gay men don't cheat, they only open and close the doors on their many relationships," Emily said as if she were reciting something.
"What sort of crap is that?" Greg said shocked.
"Its what my dad told me when I kept on noticing he was with different men," Emily explained calmly.
"Well that is messed up!"
"Really... how many guys did you know your dad slept with before today?"
"Only one," Greg said. The only person he knew his dad slept with was Josh.
"And is that normal... really? Do you think the majority of people live their whole lives having sex with just one person? The weird person is your uncle Josh. He has only been with two people and seems completely happy with it. He didn't even have a slutty coming-out period. He decided he was gay one moment and was then committed to monogamy the next."
"I found it romantic."
"Yes... it is very romantic but how real is it?"
"It lasted twelve years."
"Yep... but now it is over. Your dad is finally free so why don't you give him a break."
"What! Why are you on his side?" Greg finally realized.
"I'm not on his side. I'm on your side," Emily said quickly, realizing she might have pushed too much.
"No you're not... you are trying to get me to hate Josh in hope that I would warm up to my dad!"
"I'm just telling you the truth," Emily defended herself.
"A highly biased version of it!" Greg spat out.
"You're hopeless," Emily gave up, heading for the door.
After she was gone, Greg cried. Emily had been pushy but she still had been a friend, but seeing her try to manipulate him into hating Josh and Nathan backfired. It had done one thing though... it had made clear what the room, computer and car his father had bought for him were for... to buy his love and accept this new life. Wel Gerg would never let that happen. It was just hard to lose trust in a friend.
Poor Greg, not to mention poor David. What can Nate do? Fall for the guy who first approached him or try to see David as something other then as a brother? You will just have to wait and see. Sorry this chp took a little longer to come out. The next one will be out lot sooner. I hope you have enjoyed it so far. Tell m what you think.
JMH
trandar2002@yahoo.com