Chrysalis Part 3-Chapters 19 & 20
This story is about a young man's quest to fix a major birth defect--he was born without a penis. On his quest he meets challenges, his soul mate and many other soon to be friends.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, and events are the product of the author's imagination, or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to any real person is coincidental.
The story depicts procedures and practices common for gender reassignment; however, this story does not claim to be a medical treatise, and information is primarily for the purpose of the story and not medical advice. This story is written for adults with adult themes. If you are underage or live in a location where references to gay relationships or transgender people is forbidden, please log out of the story or move.
This work is copyrighted by Boethiuscell@gmail.com © 2023
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Chapter 19--Breaking Free
"Everything looks good for surgery at the end of this month. Physically, you are in great health, young, don't smoke, and have good nutrition. The choice now is between metoidioplasty or phalloplasty. I assume you have researched both options?" Doctor Janseens looked at Chris for an answer. "Yes," Chris replied while looking at Tom. "Although the phalloplasty will give me a larger penis, it is little better than a prosthetic. Metoidioplasty is a better option. I will be able to have an erection with sexual pleasure, urinate standing, and have fewer visible scars. Down side is the size of the penis. Two inches is not much." "The size of your penis is not important to me." Tom's face was a road map of concern. "I love you. You need to do what is best for you and how you feel about yourself. If size matters to you, then phalloplasty. If standing in front of a urinal is more important, then metoidioplasty. How do you see yourself?" Chris closed his eyes, thinking. "Thanks Tom. Metoidioplasty. Do you do a regular or ring metoidioplasty?" "I prefer Centurion because it gives the neopenis more body." "I will trust your judgement." "Normally, I require one to two years of hormone therapy before I do a metoidioplasty. This gives time for the clitoris to enlarge fully. But your clitoris has enlarged nicely, likely from your estrogen treatments, so I will be able to create an acceptable penis from it." The doctor looked at Chris for any questions. Neither Chris nor Tom had any. "You have your meeting with Dr. Havranek tomorrow." Chris said yes. "I am confident that she will approve surgery based upon my observations. I am scheduling your surgery for January 19 at 7:30 AM. We will have a follow up appointment next Monday to cover the surgery and post-surgery in more detail." Once outside the doctor's office, Chris remained quiet. Tom respectfully did not talk. "Tom," Chris finally broke his silence. "Are you fine with my not being able to fuck you. You enjoyed when I used my prosthetic for anal play." "Chris, I love having my ass plowed, but a well-managed dildo does the same. The surgery you selected today will allow you to urinate standing and give you an orgasm. The other surgery will not. I want to give you your first blow job." Tom sported a lecherous grin; they are amazing." "I look forward to that too." Chris ran his hand up Tom's backside. "I will still want you inside my ass." "Never thought that I wouldn't continue to enjoy that fine orifice."
Dr. Havranek met Chris and Tom in her minimalistic but tasteful office. Chris immediately liked the short almost forty-old woman dressed in a stylish grey business suit, grey blue blouse, and yellow floral scarf. She reminded Chris of Dr. Ruth, but with more style. She asked Tom to wait as she wanted to talk to Chris first. Her office was more personal with a collection of Snow Babies on one shelf and a smattering of Roseville and Weller pottery throughout the room. Large abstract watercolors softened the off-grey walls and dark grey furniture. "Please have a seat Chris." She gestured to the grey swivel barrel chair. She took a seat in a similar one across from him. The chair was comfortable and the hug of the back and the arms was comforting. "It is a pleasure to meet you Chris. My two daughters are in love with you since the video." "Thank you, Dr. Havranek." She put up her hand to stop him. "Please call me Tereza. I like to be more informal. But please continue." "I want to say how much I appreciate that your daughters liked the video. It was the first time I have ever done anything like that and did not expect to be inundated by fans. I wanted the video to be only about Cecelie. It is her song and voice that makes the video special." Tereza smiled at Chris; it was soft and small, but telling. "Often what we see is not what others see. Your playing was as moving as her words. There is a synergy in the video that cannot be ignored. And the howl of the coyote at the end, sends shivers through me each time I listen." "The coyote was serendipitous. It was not planned; it was nature. But we liked it and kept it." Chris slightly tilted his head at Tereza. "You have watched the video...more than once?" "The first time my daughters insisted that I watched it. I try to avoid pop music; most of the time the lyrics are banal. But Cecelie is a gifted poet and musician, but what struck me was you in the background, confident, poised, and nuanced. I must admit that I cried at the end. Then when I saw your name and connected the video to you, I watched it several more times to get a sense of who you are." "I'm flattered and a little nervous about what you saw." Chris's demeanor was light and not the least intimidated. "You are fascinating, Chris, not as a psychological subject, but as a person. I am well known in L.A., and your name has been recently popping up in many conversations among the more powerful people in town. I must admit that I Googled you. I usually don't do that with clients, but again you intrigue me. You have an impressive resume of work as a model. You were recently elected to the board of Dreamweavers. And you are a very talented pianist and performer as an out male who married into English nobility. I did find a few references that you are also transgender." Chris had never thought to Google himself so was surprised by the knowledge publicly available, but he did not mind. "My first concern when I meet clients with gender dysphoria is how they have adjusted to the gender of identity not of birth. I am not with you because you present male without any question. I saw both videos of your right hook, impressive. Were you always this strong? Was your family always so supportive?" Chris told her of his suicide attempt and the psychologist he saw. "She put the blame for my dysphoria on my father since he treated me like a son until I hit puberty and insisted that I needed to wear dresses, makeup, and start acting like a young woman or I would never find a good man and have children." Tereza eyes went wide in horror. "That is criminal, she needs to be reported to the state for malpractice and malfeasance. That is the worst advice. How did you survive?" "I finally confronted my parents and told them I would no longer dress in any way that made me hate myself. I swore that as soon as I could, I would have surgery to fix the travesty of my body to become male." "And?" "My dad kicked me out of the house with only the clothes I was wearing. It was two days before Christmas and cold in Chicago." "I am sorry Chris that that happened. Parents have a hard time accepting a child as gay much less as transgender. Did you have a friend or relative to go to?" "I spent a few days with a friend, but did not want to put them out. I lived on the street. Hank and Dion took me under their wing, and I survived until I met Tom, my husband, in April of last year. My parents and I have reconciled." Chris smiled. "They even escorted me down the aisle for my weddings." "You forgave your parents?" "Yes, my dad thought I would come running back in a couple of days. It was not that my parents never loved me; they thought they were helping. And the guilt that the psychologist laid on my father was crushing. My Dad's guilt has lessened as he learned more about gender dysphoria. And Tom's family has been very supportive. In fact, everybody close to me is supportive. I am amazed and grateful." "That answers my second concern: you having a support system. You are having not only a surgical procedure but also a psychological procedure. You will not be the same." "Very shortly after I met Tom, his cousin bought be a state-of-the-art prosthetic, which I wear daily. It has allowed me to visualize what real genitalia will look like. I know the procedure will not give me a club for a cock, but it will be mine, part of my body." "Yes, it will be part of your body and self-image, but it will not cure gender dysphoria. It will make it more manageable; you are still genetically female. The chromosomes will not change. What I want to work on with you is accepting that feminine part of you, appreciate it as part of who you are. Unless the two parts are integrated, the surgery will be a disappointment." "I am not sure I know how to do that? I do not see being feminine as liking pretty things, enjoying the arts, wanting to help and nurture people. That is for me the core of being human. So how do I accept this feminine side?" Tereza started to laugh, which alarmed Chris. "Chris, you truly are a gem. The traits you want are considered feminine by many people. I have clients who transition from female to male who need to prove that they are masculine by being aggressive, comparative, and callus. But if that is not who you are at your core, you will not be happy." "The puppy syndrome." Tereza looked at Chris confused. "When a man sees a puppy, he wants to pet it, while a woman wants to cuddle it. If I see a puppy, I want to cuddle it, I do it regardless of what other men think." "I like the analogy. It is apt as long as the behavior does not put you in danger. The world is a dangerous place for transgender people. You need to always be cautious." "I already have had my life threatened," Chris laughed as he said it. "What!" "Tom's Ex boyfriend thinks that Tom is his property and I stole him. He is in jail now...for drug dealing." "Even so, you need to be cautious." Tereza settled back into her chair. "Let's have Tom join us, if you don't mind." Tom sat in a third chair between Chris and Dr. Havranek. "Tom, you met Chris a little over eight months ago. Chris has said that you have been with him since then. Why are you with Chris? What do you get out of the relationship?" Tom sat forward in his chair staring at the doctor. "I find the insinuations in the questions disgusting. Chris is the most remarkable man I have ever met. He is kind, loving, strong, smart, talented . That he has chosen to spend his life with me humbles me and makes me want to be a better person for him. He is my life, my soul, and my breath." Dr. Havranek smiled at Tom. "Thank you Tom for answering my question the way I hoped you would. The surgery, while not difficult from a technical stand, is psychologically difficult. I agree with you that Chris is strong minded and level headed. But he will need you for both physical and emotional support as he heals, which will take longer than only the scalpel cuts." "I will be there for him always." "That is good. Now do you have a support system for you? This is a big change in your relationship." "Yes, my parents live in Malibu near us. They will be around because they love Chris as much as I. I also have friends, who are friends of Chris too; they will be supportive as well. We have arranged for a home health nurse to visit and services to clean and cook while Chris recuperates. If needed, we can fly to my family estate in England where a staff is ready to help. I do not think you appreciate how many people love Chris." "Your second cousin Braxton does not care for me." Chris smirked a smile at Tom. Tom chuckled. "Only because you were magnificent in showing the family he was an ass." Dr. Havranek, intrigued, looked at Tom for an explanation. Tom explained the event as a traditional family game and how Chris out guessed him on the game. Chris shrugged the whole description off as nothing special. "If everybody likes you," she said in response, "you have no personality, no fire to you. You, Chris, have a great deal of fire." She stood. "It has been a pleasure to meet both of you. I will strongly recommend reassignment surgery, Chris. I think you are realistic and well adjusted. I saw that Dr. Janseen scheduled surgery for the 19th. I want to see you the day before surgery to work through any nerves you may have. And then after surgery we will meet two or three times to discuss how you are adjusting to the new you." Chris and Tom left with thanks for her time. "I like her," Chris said, "much better than the other bitch I saw as a teenager." "Dear," Tom pecked a kiss on Chris's cheek. "You still are a teenager." Chris playfully slapped him on the shoulder. "Only for a couple more months."
The following Monday they met again with Dr. Janseen. He went in more detail about the surgical procedures: only clear liquids after a high protein breakfast, check into the hospital the day before for prepping. The surgery should take about three hours and Chris would be released from the hospital the next day, barring complication, with a catheter. The catheter would be in place for about four weeks while the neourethra heals. The greatest risk would be infection. Plan three to four weeks for recovery with full healing within one year. Doctor appointments were scheduled for Tuesday for the next four weeks. "What about bathing?" Chris asked. "Washcloth and soap for the first 48 hours after that a shower is fine, just wash around the incision areas carefully to prevent infection." "I have a nurse scheduled who will help transfer Chris from bed to chair and around the house by wheelchair." Dr. Janseen chuckled. "It is best if Chris walks several times a day for ten to fifteen minutes. As long as you do no strenuous activities or lifting over five pounds, a normal routine is fine. You might want a well-padded cushion to sit on. Some of my patients found it helpful." "I assume there will be swelling," Dr. Janseen nodded to Chris. "Should I wear underwear?" "Yes, it is needed to support the neopenis and scrotum while they heal. Boxer briefs with a pouch will work best. Also, you will dribble after you urinate, an absorbent pad will help the very small amount of residual urine from leaking through clothes." "When can I return to work or work from home? I mostly have a desk job" "I would do no work the first week as your body starts to heal and the discomfort from surgery recedes. A few hours a day working from home, if you feel up to it, is possible, but I would like you to hold off on that until we have had our post-surgery follow-up visit." "Thanks for all the information. It has helped me be less anxious." "You are welcome Chris. Just one more thing. I know after surgery you will want to look at your new equipment. It will be god awful ugly. Do not panic. This is normal. As the swelling goes down and the incisions heal, it will look more normal. Give your body time, by time, I mean months." Tom looked at Chris then the doctor. "How soon after surgery can Chris and I have sex?" "That is a very important question. I recommend no sexual activity for at least four weeks, to allow the incisions to heal. Chris can help you masturbate. There are also many appliances on the market that can help."
By Friday afternoon, Chris was ready to head home. The week at Dreamweavers-West was frantic and long, which kept Chris from dwelling on his surgery the following week. Tom and Chris walked into their home to the delicious fragrance of food. "Sirs," Beach said, "Mrs. Wentworth is in the kitchen." Chris looked at Tom and mouthed "Fuck." Tom chuckled, took Chris's arm, and walked toward the kitchen. "Mom, what a pleasant surprise," Tom said as she turned away from the stove to look at them. "I know that you told me to stay home, but my boy is having surgery. I need to be here for him." "I do appreciate your being here. If we had known you were coming, we would have picked you up at the airport." "If you had known I was coming, you would have insisted I didn't." Helen washed her hands in the sink and wiped them on the Donna Reed half apron. She walked toward Chris. "I'm your mother, and I need to be here for your surgery. Once you are home from the hospital, I plan on leaving. So, live with it." She hugged him and kissed his cheek and then did the same with Tom. "Mom, I am glad that you are here. I really am. There is not much you can do. I don't want you to sit here and worry." "I will sit and worry at home more because I will not be able to see you after surgery. Yes, I know that risks are minimal, but there are risks." Helen teared up. "Thank you Mom, for being here for Chris." Tom pulled Helen into a hug. "I also appreciate that you are here. I am worried too. We can fret together." "Thanks Tom. This is tough for you too." Helen squeezed Tom's hand. "I invited your parents over for supper tonight. I'm making a large pot of beef stroganoff, which was your favorite Chris." "With gnocchi?" Chris was salivating. "Tom, I know that egg noodles are traditional, but Mom's gnocchi are to die for." "When is my family arriving?" Tom asked. "In about thirty minutes, so hurry and change, then help with salad and setting the table. Everybody should fit around the kitchen table. I want tonight to be informal." Chris looked at Tom shocked that his mother was going informal. "It is only family." She smiled knowingly at Chris. Both Chris and Tom returned in shorts and T-shirts. It felt familiar to Chris working with his mother in the kitchen. For many years, the two planned meals, parties, and gatherings going over recipes and then preparing the food. He tapped his hip against his mothers. "Like old times. Thanks for being here." The happiness in Helen's face burned away any apprehension about his mother's presence in his home. She was family and she loved him. "Your virtual butler, Beach, is amazing. Once I identified myself in the camera, he let the cab onto the property. He told me where the guest room was and helped me find everything I needed in the kitchen. He is very formal, but polite. If I didn't know better, I would suspect he had a sense of humor." "We think that often," Tom chimed in as he set the table for eight. He stopped and added a ninth place assuming Nat would be with Linc. "Sirs, Tom's family has just entered the property." Anda swept into the kitchen and straight into Helen's arms. "So glad you could be here. This is a mother's place, despite the wishes of her children." She glared at Tom and Chris. "I brought a couple of more people," Quent yelled as he entered the kitchen with Bette, Tracey, Linc and Nat. Followed by Chris Sr. and Britney. Tom rolled his eyes at Chris and quickly added two more place settings. "Dad, Britney this is a wonderful surprise." Chris grinned as he hugged his father and sister. "Couldn't leave your mother alone to fret. She has been doing it so well this past week that I feared she would need a room next to yours." Chris's dad laughed as he hugged Tom. "We are both glad that you are here." Tom leaned in closer to Chris Sr.. "I was not sure what to do this weekend with just the two of us. Your support now is what we both need. We love both you and Mom." "I am very pleased that you are calling us Mom and Dad. It means a lot to us. We had thought we had lost Chris forever, and to be honest, we knew if we did it would be our fault. This whole gender dysphoria is a totally new area to us, and we did not handle it well. And to have a professional so ignorant to the reality of Chris's needs did not help. Since then, we have talked to other professionals and have a far better handle on gender identity. We need to make up for the past and be here now for Chris. Thank you for letting us." "I wanted to write you off after what you had done to Chris, but he never once blamed you. He was hurt, but he understood. You have one hell'va son." "I do, and he married one hell'va a man." "I brought cheesecake," yelled Anda. Tom and Chris Sr. returned to the group to share and laugh. After supper, Tom built a fire in the fire pit as everybody found their sweaters since it was in the upper fifty's, which was better than Chicago, Hellen pointed out. "Your home is beautiful." Hellen gushed. "It is elegant but homey. I can't believe the amount of artwork you have: two original Turner paintings and the painting of both of you in the living room is stunning. I'm not sure that I could pose nude for a painting, but it is a very tasteful." "Tracey's boyfriend, Gab, painted it for us. He did it from photos in Napa Valley." Tom said. "We did not pose nude for it either. It is his imagination. We both like it immensely." Chris smiled fondly at Tom. "Gab is just eighteen. He has an amazing career ahead of him. We are so honored to have one of his first works." "In twenty years," Chris Sr. nodded his head knowingly, "that could be worth a couple of million. How much property did you say you own?" "About four and a half acres," Tom answered. "We'll give you a tour of the developed part. Most is scrub that we are turning into vineyards. My dad has a small one so we have an expert to help us." "As your accountant, I know what you paid for this place. You got a great deal. If you sold off a few acres for development, you could turn a profit on the purchase without destroying the land you have." "We have thought of that option, but right now we like having the land and the privacy." Chris said. "We have had several intrusions onto the land, but the amount of land allows the intruders to be apprehended before they get close to the house," Tom added. "Chris is now a celebrity with all the downside to the fame. We have a very tight security system. But I still do not like Chris here alone." Helen shuddered. "I would not like to be in this large house alone, and I'm not famous." Helen scrunched her face. "What do you do when that happens?" "My brother Tracey and a friend usually stay." "Yeah, Mrs. W. This is one rad house. I love staying here." "Also, Owen, Chris's personal assistant, will be here once he finishes high school in three months." "Yes, we met him in England at the wedding. He was very nice and very attentive to both of you." Helen finished her Manhattan; Quent fixed her another. "Thanks, do you have a cook?" "No," Tom replied, "we have not been here enough to warrant hiring one, but now that Chris will be here for five or six weeks recovering, I think we need to look into that." "Inez has been a cook for us for over twenty years. It helps immensely not having to plan, shop, or prepare meals when you are tired coming home from work. She has a son in culinary school who is looking for a temporary part-time job. I'll send him your way." "Thanks, we appreciate it." "Your limited partnership was filed before the January deadline. 2015 was a windfall year for you so I have several strategies to reduce your tax burden, and separate personal expense from professional expenses." "Dad," Chris frowned at his father. "This is family time. We can discuss finances tomorrow" "Right, I'll have another martini." He stood up and went to the bar. Quent joined him for another. "What would you like to do tomorrow?" Anda asked. "It is Saturday and Quent and I are free." "Rodeo Drive," Britney quickly said. "We can go to Chateau Marmont for breakfast and then window shop Rodeo Drive for an hour. Most people only window shop because the stores are so expensive. We can wander along the `Hollywood Walk of Fame'. After lunch we can do a Warner Brothers Studio Tour. We have a friend that will give us a private tour." "Cool," Britney gushed. "Sunday, why don't we do Disneyland?" Quent offered. "It is off season so the crowds are not horrendous." Chris perked up in his seat. "That would be fun with lunch in Sleeping Beauty's Castle." "Sorry Chris, but the castle does not have a restaurant. Disney World's castle does." Anda then added, "but we can have lunch at the Lamplight Lounge or Catel restaurants. Both are good, but I prefer the Lamplight: it is more casual." "I am sure you know the place better than I do." "Chris, Quent and I are experts on the park. Tom wanted to go every day." Anda smiled at an embarrassed Tom. "Monday, everybody needs to plan for themselves. I have a doctor's appointment in the afternoon and then head into the hospital for prep." "We'll stop in Monday night to see you." Hellen's face was a visage of worry. "That is why we will have fun tomorrow and Sunday." Chris walked over to his mother and kissed her on the forehead. "Let's play Pictionary." The night was a riot of laughter as inept artists struggled with "seaweed", "post-it note", and "giant zit".
The next two days were the diversion Chris needed from his life altering surgery on Tuesday. After breakfast at the Chateau Marmont, Quent and Chris Sr. begged off, so it was only Anda, Helen, Brit, Bette, Tracy, Linc, Nat, Chris and Tom who went shopping on Rodeo Drive. Anda drove everyone in her SUV. Tom commented to Chris that then needed one. Chris bought both his mothers' silk scarves as Sax and his fathers' ties at Ralph Lauren. For his sister and sister-in-law, Bette, he purchased shoes from Stuart Weitzman. At Tumi, he purchased sling packs for Linc and Tracey. At Tod's he found himself a pair of slip-on shoes, which he thought would be comfortable around the house. When they went into Etro, Chris was mobbed by adoring, attentive sales clerks. Helen was thrilled to be at the center of attention, while Tom gave Chris a stupid grin and a shrug of the shoulders. After several selfies with staff, Chris purchased for Tom a tight pair of animal print trousers, which flattered his ass, according to Britney, and a simple beige silk shirt. Then it was lunch at The Farm of Beverly Hills. It was too chilly to eat outside and people-watch, but they were given a table near the window. Helen looked at the menu and smiled politely: it was mostly salads with only a couple of burgers. "Now I understand why most people in L.A. are thin," she said with a tight smile at the server, who did not smile back. "I'll have the turkey chili and..." She looked over the menu again. "The blackened chicken wrap." She almost shoved the menu back to the server. The rest ordered soup as well since it was in the mid-sixties and various salads. A glass of wine eased Helen's fugue; the soup eased it more since it was fabulous. Helen could not stop raving about the soup. "This has been a very popular restaurant for almost twenty years." Anda took over the tepid conversation. "Many of Hollywood's elite eat here: producers, directors, and the people who make stars." Anda looked around the room and waved. Chris turned and looked and waved too. Helen looked at the man who was at a table with four other people; she did not recognize anyone. The man stood up and walked over. "This is a pleasant surprise to see you, Anda, Chris and Tom. I was talking to my wife just yesterday that we need to invite you over for supper soon. Claret comes home every day excited about what he is doing." He looked at Helen and Britney. "Mom, Britney, this is Bill Powell. Bill this is my mother Helen and sister, Brit. I think you know Anda's children. The one snuggling next to Linc is Nat. She is the COO of Dreamweavers--West and Linc's girlfriend." Bill reached across to shake hands with Chris's mother, sister, and Nat. "It is a pleasure to meet all of you. I think you said your parents live in Chicago, so I assume that you are out sightseeing?" Helen affirmed the question. "If you are free this afternoon, we are doing a critic's screening of the movie, Hail, Caesar!; I would like you to attend." "Thank you Bill," Chris looked around the table for disagreement, but found none. "We would love it. I've never been to a premier much less a sneak preview." "I will make sure to rectify that. The preview is at Universal Studios at 3:00 PM." "We will be there." Anda said for the group. "I will leave your name at the gate to let you in." Bill started to leave then stopped. "I was discussing with a director having you do a screen test, Chris. We are reviewing a script now, which has a character you might be perfect for. If that is of any interest to you." "I appreciate the consideration, but Dreamweavers keeps me very busy." Helen's jaw dropped at her son's reluctance. "I am having my surgery this week and will be home for about five weeks recuperating, so we can talk in a week or two." "Three weeks," Tom firmly said. Bill chucked, "Yes, three weeks. I need to get back to my table. It was nice seeing you again and meeting your family." Once Bill was out of earshot Helen turned toward her son. "You turned down a chance to be a movie star. Are you an idiot?" Britney looked at Chris and rolled his eyes at Tracy, who politely smiled. "No, I did not turn him down. I said I would think about it. I love working for Dreamweavers and now that Tom has responsibility for Thistledown, I am not sure we have the time." Further discussion ended when Anda ordered four brownie sundaes to share. The critic screening was fun. After the movie, a social with nibbles and drinks was held in an elegant room with Mr. Powell and a couple of the stars. The critics' responses were mostly positive. Helen basked in the attention of critics who asked her opinion and the actors who dotted on her. Many of the critics were more interested in talking to Chris than talking about the movie. Mr. Powell cornered Chris, who had wandered to the fruit bar. "Chris, thank you for coming. I need you to attend more critic screenings. I was sure that the critics would pan the movie because of the obvious slap stick and convoluted plot. You were oil on stormy waters." "Thanks Bill. I did enjoy the movie. I thought the religious parts were melodramatic, but that is the period the movie was set in. I'm not sure that people who are not familiar with Hollywood of the period will relate. The critics are historians of film and understand the parody and satire. The general public will like George Clooney and the other characters, but miss the subtle humor. It should do well, but not a blockbuster." "That is my assessment too, but happy critics get people in the theater." "Yes, butts in the seats means money in the wallet." Chris laughed, Bill did too. "Your mother seems to be enjoying herself. She is the perfect hostess: circulating, laughing, and encouraging conversation. I take that you learned these skills from her." Chris laughed--Tom joined them, putting an arm around Chris-. "My mother always wanted to be a socialite, so she would have these extravagant, well-planned parties for friends and associates, which I helped her with. Sadly, my parents' social circle was solidly upper middle class, when my mother's aspirations were high society. She will feed off this for years." Chris chuckled. "And I am happy for her." Anda joined the three. "Thanks for inviting us to the preview. I enjoyed the movie very much. But I need to gather my companions and leave. We have dinner reservations tonight at The Sunset in Malibu for 7:15." "Nice place to watch the sunset." Bill patted Anda's hand. "Tell Quent that I will call him soon. I have a couple of projects that need professional help, and one that needs a script." "Be happy too. He is just finishing a project which means he will be starting projects around the house." Anda winked at Bill. "He is not a handyman so other projects are welcome. Again thanks." She, Chris and Tom gathered the rest of the family and left. Helen chattered all the way to Chris and Tom's about how cute Alden Ehrenreich is. Chris sat during supper letting the conversations flow around him watching the setting of the sun over the Pacific. He was happy. The next day at Disneyland, the inner children ruled the park. The Haunted Mansion, It's a Small World, Peter Pan Flight, and Thunder Mountain had everyone giggling and laughing. Chris's favorite was The Enchanted Tiki Room; the birds were unexpected, funny, and enchanting. They stayed through the Paint the Night Electrical Parade and the fireworks. No thought was given to the next two days and the surgery that would change Chris's life. By midnight Chris and Tom crawled into bed exhausted but happy. Chris kissed Tom. "Thank you for helping pass the last two days. I even enjoyed my parents. I love you." Tom turned to say he loved Chris too, but Chris was asleep.
Everybody rose late on Monday after the exhausting Sunday. Britney knocked at Tom and Chris's bedroom door. "Brought you coffee," she yelled and then walked in. Tom was in the shower, so Britney crawled onto the bed next to her brother. "Thank you for the last two days. It was good for us as a family." She snuggled closer to Chris. "I am scared about your surgery, but I know that this is something that you need, so you have my full support." She kissed his cheek. "And I am fucking proud of you. It takes true courage to not cave to all the forces that are against you being who you are. I don't know that I have that courage." "Brit, you do, but you have not needed it yet." She giggled, "I am more forceful with the rents about what I want. They are more willing to listen to me. That is thanks to you. I love you and want you to be happy." "I leave the room for five minutes and you end up with a woman in our bed." Tom laughed as he entered the room, wearing only a towel around his waist. "Fuck, Chris you've got yourself one hot man." She turned to Chris and pouted. "Can I have him, please?" then laughed, getting off the bed. "I'll leave so you can dress...eventually." She left giggling. "Love your sister. You getting up?" "Eventually," Chris said and patted the space empty space next to him in the bed. An hour later Chris and Tom joined Chris's family in the kitchen. Helen had made mango stuffed crepes, because mangos were so common in California. They were good, which should not have surprised Chris. "Son," Chris Sr. said, "what are the plans for today?" "Tom and I meet with Dr. Havranek, my psychiatrist, to discuss how I am feeling about the surgery. Then I need to check myself into the hospital. They will do blood work and other tasks to prepare me for surgery at 7:30 tomorrow morning." "Can we visit tonight?" Helen asked. "Yes, that would be very nice. While I am excited to have the surgery, I am very nervous about the surgery too. It is so strange. I am getting what I have wanted for years, but I'm scared too. This is an irreversible step. If I don't like it, I cannot change it." "Honey, we are all scared too." Helen sat next to Chris. "But ask yourself, do you like the way you are now? I think not. Change is scary, but you are a strong man with a loving husband. Things will be better." Helen started to softly cry. "When you tried to take your life, I had no clue why. I thought you might be bullied at school or doing drugs or God knows what else. Since then and our time without you in our lives, I have studied your gender thingy. You need to finish what you started when you had your breasts removed. You need to be a whole person." "Your mother is right son; your mother and I fucked up royally when we dismissed as trivial your gender identity issues. I stupidly blamed myself for causing it. But it is an anomaly of nature that needs to be fixed. Just know that your mother and I love you and know that this is best for you." "Me too," added Britney. "Tom," Chris, Sr. said, `thank you for loving our son. We know that he is in caring and loving hands with you." He grabbed Tom into a hug and didn't let go. Helen joined the hug, then Chris and finally Britney. "Our first family hug," Britney squealed. "It's awesome." It was awesome; Chris felt loved like he never had before; he felt strong and determined; he felt peace.
Chris woke up from surgery with Tom holding his hand. "Hi hon. How do you feel?" "Like I had my insides ripped out." Chris knew his lips moved as he said it, but his mind was not sure. "Hate to tell you this but you did have your insides ripped out." Tom's smile eased Chris in a subtle way. "Guess that's true. Have you looked?" "No, you are still in bandages. But the doctor said everything went better than expected. You will be on pain pills for several days, so will be groggy. He will be in later to talk to us, but you should be able to go home tomorrow." "How are our parents?" "Your mom is a basket case, but everybody else is holding it together. I called them when you got out of surgery to say it went well." "Are they all in the waiting room?" "No, our fathers convinced them to wait at my parents until after you have recovered from the anesthesia. They will be up this afternoon." "What time is it?" Tom looked at the watch Chris had given him. "10:46 AM" "Did you let Grandda know?" "Yes and Millie, Helga, and Chaz. I tasked them with letting everybody else know." "Thanks. I'd like some water." "Anything for you my precious man." Chris took a sip from the cup Tom offered and slipped back into slumber. He woke up to a room full of flowers, balloons and the people he loved. His mind was still fuzzy and conversations beyond monosyllables was difficult, but his family expertly made up the difference. He slept off and on while they chattered. He woke up once during the night for a nurse delivering his medications; Tom was softly snoring in a chair. The light from the parking lot lit half his face. How did he get so lucky, Chris thought as he drifted back into sleep.
It was late afternoon by the time Tom helped Chris moved from his bed to the sofa in the family room propped up by pillows, covered with a blanket, and stared at by six pairs of eyes waiting for an uttered command from him. "I brought you a tray of beef broth and yarrow tea. Mavis swears by it." Owen placed the tray over Chris's lap, and then tucked a napkin under his chin. Chris stared at Owen trying to figure out what was out of place. He took a sip of the tea: warm, bitterness offset by honey. Not dreaming? "Owen, what are you doing here. You are in England finishing school." Chris closed his eyes and opened them again. "Janseens didn't warn me about hallucinations." Owen laughed, "Sorry, but I'm here. I arranged to finish online. I couldn't leave my boss's mate to fend for himself. You'd starve." "I don't recall you being much of a cook." Chris continued to stare at Own, pleased he was here to help Tom. "Never claimed to be, but I am a wiz at dialing delivery." Chris started to laugh but it hurt. "I am glad that you are here." Chris dozed off.
Chapter 20--The New Me
Two days later, after Chris's parents had returned to Chicago, Tom found Chris in their bathroom, standing naked in front of the mirror, crying. Chris's groin was a swollen, red patchwork of stitches. Tom kissed Chris's cheek, "It is pretty gruesome in a Frankenstein way, but the doctor said the swelling and redness will decrease. It will look normal in no time." "No Tom, I am not repulsed by the look. I am happy. It may look like a dog chewed on it, but to me it is beautiful. It is my dick--you don't know how nice it is to say `my dick'. That is what I see in the mirror. It may not be spectacular, but it is mine, part of me. It is the way I see myself; the me that was hidden, but now I have broken free. I am me."
This is the end of this story. The lives of Chris and Tom will continue, if you donate to Nifty.