Chronicles of a Real-Life Fag, part 1
i've always known i'm a faggot. since around 7 years old. but that's a story for another time. for now, we start right at the very....middle.
2015, a hot summer night. in a rare occasion, i'm 14 & i'm home alone. i'm on the phone with my girl friends in high school & we're talking about the dumb girl in physics class. i'm having a blast with my girls, Nel & Tess, but secretly i cannot wait to hang up & look up some big cocks to jerk my teeny tiny dick to. i learned later in time, that what i have cannot even be called a dick. the more suitable term is a clit. with a "pathetic little" usually before it. pathetic little clit.
at some point, i get a text from my downstairs neighbor. i tense up a bit. he is my neighbor...but he is also my 2nd biggest crush. (my number one crush is conveniently...his brother, but that's also a story for another time).
my neighbor, ramsey, goes to my school -the one good school in the neighborhood- and he's three years older than me. shocker, he's also popular. i never got exactly why because he's not necessarily the biggest jock out there, & he's not necessarily a heartthrob, but he was...the man.
i remember him when he was short, a few years back, his lanky body, his tan arms hanging from his cut-off vest. even then i liked him most out of the neighborhood boys. his alpha attitude & behavior, even from a young age, had him leading the pack. it was just natural. sometimes, i was in the pack, & sometimes i was its victim. once, it was one of the days where he decided that i was gonna be on the receiving end of the pack's bullying. which is how i ended up on the ground, getting kicked by 6 boys in the basement of our building. which also somehow ended up with me rushing to the bathroom to rub my hard dick...well...clit.
but one summer, out of nowhere, ramsey grew 6 feet & 5 inches tall. and running into him in the garage, eyes looking up to meet his intense-green-eyed gaze, towering over me & looking down on me, i knew my fate. something in me knew, that he's got me in the palm of his hands.
and he knew it too.
where i'm from, it's not normal to be gay. it's not accepted, & that's not even a question. if you were a slightly-feminine man, you had to do the hard work to fit in. but i must have missed that part, cause although i grew a bit taller & sprouted a few hairs here & there, my voice never caught up. & my demeanor didn't bother catching up either. so here you have, a 14 year-old boy, clearly less than a male, staring up into a 17-year old man's eyes, standing a few feet above him....
but somehow, that interaction went about normally. he asked me about my summer & the upcoming semester at school. i was pleasantly surprised to see that although it was clear now the different leagues we belong to, it did not mean the end of our friendship (if you could call it that)
we started the school semester and i saw him everyday, as we shared the same bus. this meant that every morning, i got to see him, and sometimes, if he's in the mood, talk to him quickly. that's how it appeared to the naked eye, but inside my head were the most twisted fantasies conjuring up, about all the ways i could service him & have him use me. after his growth spurt, his voice deepened & his muscles grew more defined, his facial hair grew & connected. which drove my fantasies to all the wild places my 14-year-old hormone-riddled brain could go. in the bus, i'd be trying my best to catch a few sly glimpses of his crotch, wondering about his dick: how long, how thick, hairy or not, cut or uncut, with a lean in it or not. i'd wonder about his balls, how heavy, how fuzzy, whether they were hanging loose in his underwear right now, if one is squished to the side. i'd wonder if he had masturbated last night, or even more exciting, this morning. did he shoot his load in a sock, or did he use tissues that are holding his superior seed, laying in a trash can, in his room, right now.
i figured, with his general giant-ness, his cock must be at least 8 inches, and his balls were most likely heavy with potent semen. after all, this alphahood must come from somewhere...
fair to say, i got lost in my fag brain on those bus rides every morning & afternoon. when we'd get to our stop, he'd make me hold his bag and take lug it up the stairs. you'd think i would be embarrassed having to carry his bag in front of the other kids on the bus, but i was proud. i was looking at the others thinking "yeah...look at that. out of all of you, he chose ME to carry his bag. eat your heart out."
i never gave the bag-thing too much thought back then, it seemed natural, but now looking back...it's clear as day that it was a young alpha, establishing his power.
and he sure knew how to use it.
PING "hey boi, gotta talk with you."
i draw a mini-gasp & my heart skips a beat. his presence, whether in person or on text, always had this effect on me. i like to think of it as my fag hormones kicking in. i quickly make up an excuse to the girls and hang up the call. i start typing "hey ramsey, yea sure what's up?". played it cool. chill. you know...we hang. cause even though in my head he has used every hole of mine possible & his dick has forged a new pathway down my throat...in real life, we were just neighbors/schoolmates/friends(?).
"i've gotta talk to you irl, i'll come up." WHAT? my breath quickens and chest tightens. he's coming up? now don't get me wrong he's been to our place before, and i've been to his. our families are friendly-neighbors, and it's not unusual. but, this is the first time he's coming up with the purpose of speaking to ME, at 11 p.m., mind you. i'm so glad my parents aren't home for the night because i'm not sure what i'd say..."hey, so i know it's late but ramsey is coming up....i'm not sure why?"
anyway, i take a quick look in the mirror, and the bell rings. i quietly rush to the door, and take a deep breath. putting on the cool act, like it's just my best friend on the other side, & i open the door...
TWO. there are two men standing in front of my door. ramsey, of course. his head a few inches under the frame, looking down at me with his piercing green eyes. his jet-black hair in his signature straight-messy-do, rocking washed blue jeans - that show just how long his legs are (as if there needs to be more emphasis on that) - and a casual white polo. next to him, stands a man i had never seen before, around the same height as ramsey, with a similar build, just a bit wider and muscular. if ramsey had been working out for a few months, this guy had been in the gym for a couple of years now. his biceps were bulging out of his black polo, making me go feral. the contrast of his white skin, with the dark black polo was also...doing something to me. as you know, at that age, a stick on the floor, has the power to turn you on....the man's face was a bit more rough than ramsey's clear skin, which was emphasized by his military hair cut. taking a good look at him, i saw a real man, the one's made to rule the world & spread their seed. even at the door, taking in the new guy, i couldn't help but imagine....just for a quick second, how it would feel to have him force feed me his man cock.
little did i know, that by the end of our "quick chat", i wouldn't have to imagine.
part 2 coming soon....with some (a lot) more steam ;)
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