I have been informed that it would be a good idea to state a few warning comments. There may be graphic sexual scenes between men in this story, so please, if this offends you, or it is illegal or you are underaged to read such, stop here and hit your "back" button. If it is okay with you, read on and enjoy.
Chapter 1
Hi! My name is Seth. Seth Miller Gary. I'm gay. I didn't always know this. I did not have a hard time coming to realize my sexuality like some. And it wasn't really that hard to come out to my parents, either.
You see, my older brother, Chris, discovered his gayness before me. He is two years older and I suppose because he is older, he always seemed a lot older to me. And as the youngest in the Gary family, my parents - especially my mom - tried to keep me young. Call me a momma's boy!
When I was sixteen, I walked in on my brother having sex with his friend. Chris had brought Craig home for Christmas. They did not know I saw them - well at least as first, because they thought I was in bed. They were in a bedroom that was attached to a bathroom which opened also to the hall. I woke up and had to pee, and heard commotion behind their door. I quietly opened the door, and was so mesmerized by what I saw, I didn't notice that the door had completely swung open.
I walked in pretty much in the middle of their act. I think maybe they had been doing it for awhile before I started spying on them. Here's about the gist of it:
"I may never get another chance to do this. I want to do it right." My brother said, before he went down on Craig, whom he later would become lovers with. He started to pump down with his head and mouth, slowly at first, then increasing until I was sure it was all Craig could do to keep from screaming out. Chris suddenly stopped and squeezed the tip of Craig's penis.
"God, man, What are you trying to do to me?" Craig said.
"You want the whole shebang?" Said Chris.
Craig looked thoughtful as he said, "Yeah?"
Chris threw the covers back, and knelt over him, and started to lick at the head.
"Hey, man you don't have to -"
"I really want to. Is it alright?" My brother said.
"I guess!" Craig answered. Chris resumed licking around the head, took it in his mouth, and tongued the hole. Craig shuddered hard. Chris looked up and Craig's eyes were tightly closed, and he had an almost pained smile across his face. Chris rubbed his balls hard, pressing them up against the shaft of his manhood. Craig let out a very quiet shriek.
"Shhh," Chris said, giggling a little. He wet his finger with his mouth and moved his hand to Craig's anus and stroked it. Craig tensed up and then relaxed. Chris started sucking in earnest, stroking up and down with his face very quickly. Craig was breathing pretty hard. He then grabbed Chris's head and stopped all movement. Chris looked up.
"Weren't you going to stick your finger up my - ?" Craig said.
"Did you WANT me to?"
"It's supposed to be pretty hot isn't it?"
Chris lubed his index finger up with saliva and gently worked it in. He went deep and at the same time pulled his mouth back down onto Craig's shaft. He found his prostate and flipped his finger against it. A high pitched moan escaped from Craig.
"Shhh!" Chris whispered. "you can't make any noise! My parents!"
"Fuck, man! I'm sorry! You're going to have to do this again when I don't have to bridle myself so!"
"So it's a date?" Chris giggled! I think I was witnessing their first time. Maybe Craig's VERY first!
Chris poked his finger in over and over and then he deep throated Craig. Craig started to moan and shake wildly! It was easy to see from where I stood, by the way Craig's whole body contracted, that he was having a very powerful orgasm! It was obvious that my brother was having trouble swallowing all of Craig's spunk. But he swallowed most of it. In Craig's excitement - he was pretty much out of his head - he grabbed Chris, pulled him up and kissed him hard on the mouth.
"Ewww!" I thought about Craig's spunk being still in Chris's mouth!! Maybe I even made a noise in my disgust. Chris suddenly looked up past Craig's head at the bathroom door. There I stood with my mouth wide open. I was all at once panicked! I ran back to my room. I had a bone of my own to contend with!
I woke up the next morning and tiptoed into Chris's room. Chris may have slept longer except for my hand gently shaking his shoulder.
"Chris." I whispered. "Chris, are you awake?"
He gave him the `duh!' look and then put his finger to his lips. Chris's arm was under Craig. Craig's face was buried in Chris's neck. Somehow Chris was able to extricate himself without waking Craig. Chris and I tip-toed to the den, and in a low whisper, I said, "Man, Chris, I have never had any serious desire to be with another guy, but last night, I heard noises coming from your room, and when I got there - well, what I saw blew me away!"
"I'm so sorry you had to see that, little brother! I am so sorry!"
"Why? It was so hot! I -"
"Seth, I want to tell you something."
I looked up at Chris with waiting eyes. I could read concern in Chris's voice, but I didn't know what was coming next. "What, Chris?"
"Seth, I gotta tell you, first of all, that was the first time - I ever - well it's the first time I ever enjoyed doing that. I was raped earlier this year by another roommate, and it was not that - - - good. It was painful but - somehow - it was still pretty hot, but I didn't like it. But it did give me a hunger for more, in a better circumstance. But then just knowing you were there watching makes me sick! I am so sorry you had to see that!"
"But Christy," I said, feeling a little hurt, "I liked it! Hee hee, I went back and had a good wank because of it!"
That was my initiation to the gay world. As it turned out it was almost my brother's initiation as well.
So Chris had to "initiate" my parents to the idea. Let me tell you, it was not too nice at first. I could hear my parents talking after they were in bed. My dad blamed my mom for babying him too much, and he blamed himself for not spending enough time with Chris. It never occurred to him that maybe Chris was just born that way. Luckily for Chris, he was up at U. C. Berkeley for all this. Lucky for me, they learned about all this stuff before they found out about me - before I found out, for sure!
My mom did not say much, until my dad stopped ranting. "I have suspected this for some time." She said quietly.
"What?!" How could you -?"
"Dear, think about it. Chris has no close friends - guy friends, that is. All his close friends are girls. He dates all the time, but never with any one girl. He is so good looking, the girls like being with him. But Look at his bedroom. Who's posters do you see?"
"Who's?" my dad asked.
"Have you not even been in his bedroom lately?" She asked, incredulously. "On the wall next to his bed, is a picture of some rock star - I think it says something like "Jim Morrison or Morrisey or something. But the young man in the picture is naked from the waist up! I can imagine he looks up at that when he - well you know!"
"How could I have been so blind! So stupid!"
Mom gave dad some literature she found to try to understand. Dad felt better about it after he studied it out for himself. I feel so lucky. Many parents are not that open to trying to understand.
Well, I had already had sex with a girl. And I liked it! So I was pretty sure I was not gay - maybe bi. I know that my brother's other room mate, whom I met later, Rob, was very nice to me, and I fantasized about him a few times. And my cousin's lover, Colin! He was so nice, I thought he was trying to come on to me. It was just my imagination, as I was very immature at 17 when I first met Colin.
One time after they had transferred to U.C. Santa Barbara, Rob started to tickle me. I am very ticklish. I could not make him stop. I drenched the front of my pants with cum! Rob, who is straight as an arrow, was so embarrassed! He looked out for me ever after - to be sure no one tickled me too much! Of course I was devastated! I never wanted to see any of them again! But they soothed me by telling me it could happen to anyone. I was placated.
As I said, I was pretty immature. My best friend was not a girl, as in Chris's case. It was a neighbor kid, Eddie. Ed was 14. I told him about what I spied my brother doing. He said, "Wow! That sounds hot! Maybe we could try it!"
"No way, dude!" I said. "That's gay!"
"Only if you do it only with guys!"
"Whaddaya mean?" I answered, hoping he would be convincing.
"I read that lot's of guys do it together when they are our age. The guy that wrote this book said it may be better than experimenting with girls. No chance of anyone getting pregnant!"
It did not take too much convincing. I was already primed and ready. But it felt reassuring to me, to be "convinced" by my friend. Made me feel more like it was not "my fault"! After that first time, we were addicted! We were "caught" by his little brother, who was 11 at the time. So, again, I "let" myself be convinced to allow Mel into our parties.
When my cousin and his lover got married in Vermont, We went to the wedding.
I was by that time 17, and increasingly curious. I sneaked out from the motel we were staying at, after everyone else was asleep. I went to a nearby gay bar I noticed earlier in the day, and hung out in the parking lot. I was picked up by a couple of older guys. Scummy older guys! I was too scared to back out, and went to their apartment, and they had sex in front of me. It was hot and disgusting at the same time. They were both so dirty. The bigger one kept leering at me, and telling me I was next. I was petrified! After he was done with his partner, they took me back to the bar and were going to, after regenerating, take me back again and both rape me. They threatened to kill me if I made any commotion.
Lucky for me, my parents found me gone, and alerted the rest of the family - our whole party - that I was missing. My brother found me, and dragged me out to the parking lot, followed by the scuuimies. Then with his lover, Craig, the two of them were just about to get their butts creamed when Rob showed up. Robe was 6'-6, and weighed probably 300 pounds. He wiped these guys out! No he did not kill them, but between the three of them they held them until the police came.
I guess a problem with a liberal state like Vermont is that even though they allow gays to marry, they also let those scumbags go! To terrorize and maybe murder someone else - maybe some young guy like myself. So what are the chances I would ever see them again? Well, it happened! Months later, on another visit to see my cousin, Jake, who had AIDS,the scumbags saw me on a ferry on one of the Great Lakes, and they threw me off into the frigid winter water! My brother kept a journal of it. Here is his account:
We all were out of the car for the ferry ride. Seth walked to the rear of the ferry. I heard him scream! I looked and a guy pushed him over the side! I ran back, followed closely by Colin and then Jake. There was a man running back toward the front, on the other side of the cars. I saw two other passengers running after the guy who pushed Seth, as I removed my loafers and dove into the water. I swam to Seth. There was no ice on the lake, but you couldn't have told Seth or me that!
The ferry gradually slowed down and started to turn. I reached Seth as it was almost turned around. It was so cold, but I hardly noticed! I was so worried about Seth. He was a good swimmer, but he was so skinny! I was afraid he would lose it from hypothermia. When I reached him, he already was turning blue.
"Keep swimming, Seth! Keep moving!"
"I - I'm too cold!" I swam up to him and wrapped my body around his, as if to give him some of my heat. We went under. I couldn't hold on like this!
I reasoned that he wouldn't get that much heat from me anyway. We came back to the surface. I was almost panicky. I truly didn't know what to do!
As we broke the surface a second time, I heard a loud bang coming from the direction of the Ferry. I was disoriented. It didn't seem to be where I thought it should.
Then I saw it! Our ferry was coming from one direction, but the next one was bearing down on us from the other! I knew that we could not dive beneath it. I thought of Craig, saw his smiling face. I thought of my high school graduation. Then I thought of a girl I had made fun of in the 5th grade. I wondered if this was my punishment. I then saw Seth's blue face in front of me. I reached out and my body seemed to know what to do, even if I didn't. My hand slapped his face with a force that surprised even me! He seemed to come to. I screamed, "Swim, Goddammit! Or I'll beat the shit out of you!"
That was the last thing I remember, before waking up in the car. It wasn't Jakes car. But someone had warmed up their car really warm and I was lying, still soaking wet in the back of an SUV. As I came to, I noticed that it was warm in the car, even though I still felt cold and wet. Then I remembered. I jerked around! "Seth! SETH! WHERE'S MY BROTHER!"
"Chris! It's me!" I looked the other way. Jake was there in the front seat. "Seth's in another car."
"Is he - is he -" I could not bring myself to say it!
"He's cold and wet - like you are. Luckily one of the other riders had a towel in his car. Colin is with him now, drying him and trying to get him warm."
"I started to rise, "I want to go to him! I want Seth!"
"Colin will take good care of him."
Just about then, They brought the wet towel to me. The lady who brought it said Seth was warm in his cousin's arms. Colin had told her he was his cousin. Someone handed me a warm blanket. When we got back to the Burlington side, I stepped out of the SUV and was helped to the other car. I saw Seth's naked, lifeless body, cradled in Colin's arms. Colin was crying. My heart stopped.
Then I saw Seth open his eyes. He smiled up weakly at Colin. Colin smiled back, and hugged him even closer, kissing him on then top of his head. They then gave each of them a blanket, and Colin lifted and carried Seth to a waiting ambulance. He had gotten pretty close! They kept him overnight at the Hospital, but released him in the morning. Before we left, there was Officer Jackson, who was the nice officer who interrogated seth from the original altercation!
He explained to us that the guy who pushed Seth in the water was the smaller of the thugs who had assaulted him that night two and a half months ago. His hair was cut. He looked different. Seth said he didn't recognize him until it was too late. The men that followed him on the Ferry found his larger partner at their car with a gun. One of them was shot in the leg while scuffling with the two bad guys. They were taken back into custody. It was the big guy who did the shooting. With all the witnesses, Officer Jackson said there would be no problem getting a conviction. I asked if Seth would have to come back. He said probably not. Both Jake and Colin had witnessed Seth as he told them positively that the guy who attacked him on the boat and was also the same who assaulted him at the bar.
The rest involved two more eyewitnesses, one of which got shot. These guys were going away for a long time!
Well, what can I say? Either I lead a charmed life or I seem to get myself into the wrong place at the wrong time. Anyway, it all worked out.
I told Chris and Craig about Eddie and Mel, and shortly after, their step-dad attacked Mel, the twelve-year-old. I made them walk with me to the police station, and their mom kicked the scum bag out. But both boys know their mom knew what was going on the past 3 years as the old man was raping Eddie regularly. When he went for the little guy., Eddie called me and I headed over. When the step dad was finished with Mel, he fell skunk-drunk asleep on Mel's bed.
So we started walking. There is a restraining order out, but to be safe, my parents asked the boys to stay with us for awhile.
I guess you could say I was pretty immature, as a teen. I obviously had some quick growing up experiences. Fortunately for me, my parents and my brother and cousin and their friends were there to help me grow from those experiences. I wouldn't wish anything like that on anybody else, but I can't say I wish they never happened to me, either.
I have known Eddie for 3 years. When he was almost 13 and I was 15, we were the greatest of friends. Well, more than that. He was my "suck buddy". His dad started raping him when he was 11! So he was somewhat experienced before I was. We experimented - a LOT! His little brother caught us once and we were devastated. We were sure he was going to tell. Instead, he asked us to include him in our shenanigans. We were dubious, but felt we had no choice. We found out that not only was Mel cute and pretty cool for his age, (3 years younger than Eddie), but also that 3-somes were FUN!
Because of the situation with their dad, my brother, Chris, convinced me that I should no longer "play" with the brothers, since they were staying at our house, at least temporarily. I was almost 18 and that would make them felonious for me to mess with. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do! Giving it up was bad enough, but having them right there so close and seriously tempting me, all the time. Let me tell you, if I knew my right hand intimately before, he was my constant companion after Mel and Ed moved in! I tried my best to still be a friend and even a brother to them, but when I stopped all the sex play, Ed especially withdrew from me. He was emotionally scarred from years of sexual abuse from his dad, then to lose me was a heavy burden for him.
Please don't be too hard on me. Believe me, I reasoned with myself - nightly at first - whether it was a good idea to stop my activity with them.
Each time I came to the same conclusion, uttered originally by my brother:
If it got back to their parents, the boys would be removed from us, and as they were not official wards of the court, because their mom had a restraining order against their dad, if they left us they would go back home. And knowing their dad, that would not be safe. So I chose the right and kept myself away.
My brother and his partner, Craig, who was also fast becoming another brother to me, got married soon after my 18th birthday. I had a major crush on Craig, and an even bigger one on my older cousin's mate, Colin. My cousin, Jake, had caught AIDS and Colin determined to stay with him until the end. They met a guy through Colin's brother, Bobby, who told them about a relatively new drug or something, and he was as if he were completely recovered. I am ashamed to say that I fantasized a bit about getting Colin for myself if my cousin ever died. And Colin was my special friend.
My brother and cousin and their friends were all very nice to me. As much as I would have liked it, they would not have sex with me, but I always slept close to them when I stayed with them. So you see, this was why it was so hard for me to give up playing with Ed and Mel cold turkey!
Just when it got really critical for me, Chris and Craig returned from their honeymoon with a surprise for me. They brought me this hot little Hawaiian boy. Boy? Well, in reality he was older than either of them, but like me, he was a late bloomer. He was 5'-7" tall, about a half inch shorter than I.
He had shiny hair so black it looked blue, or reflected almost any color he was near to, and almost purple eyes! He was gorgeous! Almost as gorgeous as Craig. Oh did I tell you? Craig could have been Mr. Universe!
I, accompanied by Eddie and Mel, picked up Chris and Craig at the airport after their honeymoon, and there met Luke. Our first meeting was awkward. Apparently he was also impressed with me, and when we were introduced, instead of "HI! How'r you?" We both gawked and almost together said, "Wow!" It was a toss up which of us turned redder! Then he tried to break the tension by saying I looked like Chris. Ther is a family resemblance, but it would be stretching it to say we looked anything alike! All the others laughed.
Then on the way back to Santa Barbara, where both Chris and Craig were attending the University, the car was so crowded, Luke and I had to take turns sitting on each other's lap. Well, when he was on the bottom, I only half sat on him, but it was very uncomfortable, so when we switched he sat squarely on my lap. I KNOW he felt my reaction to this! He finally fell asleep with both arms holding me. It felt so right!
When we got to Chris's place, their room mate, Rob, was gone, so the boys slept in his room. There were three bedrooms, and so Luke got the other one. I lay down on the couch and was almost asleep, when I heard, "Pssssst!"
I looked over the back of the couch, and in the dim light I saw Luke peeking out his door, with his finger beckoning me. I'm sure he expected me to put up a fight, but I was so used to sleeping with the other guys, I popped right up and almost ran to his bed. We both were in our skivvies and we went to sleep, back to back. When I my brother quietly woke me up, Luke was spooned up close behind me. I didn't move as I looked up at Chris, his eyes arched almost to his hairline. He smiled and quietly said we needed to be to breakfast in a half hour and then tiptoed out.
I rubbed and hugged Luke's arms until he woke up. I thought he would be embarrassed, but if he was, he covered it well. Well, after falling asleep to my throbbing woody in the car, maybe he felt justified. He put his cheek on mine and said, "Morning, Haoli!"
"What's that?" I said.
"It means foreigner" in Hawaiian, but it has come to mean Caucasian, or whitey'!"
"So, why are you calling me that?" I didn't get it.
"Look at our arms!" I looked. His was almost black in comparison to mine, in the dim morning light.
"Oh." I said, and I hugged his arm again. "So, what can I call you?"
"You can call me Luke."
"Duh! But you already have a pet name for me. That's not fair!"
"What's fair?" He replied. "I gave you a name, it's up to you to give me one. THAT'S fair!" His superior maturity was asserting itself. I turned around to face him. We were so perfectly sized for each other! His face was not a half-inch away. "I know you did not brush your teeth after that sandwich last night!" He said, "So how come your breath smells so good?"
"Genetics, I guess. Yours isn't bad either!" I said, and I could not resist. I kissed him! If I surprised him, I even surprised myself more. And what surprised me more, was he kissed me back!
"Okay, Haoli, I'm no longer a virgin!"
"You mean you never kissed a guy before?"
"Not a guy or a girl! I have never done anything with anyone!"
"Are you - interested - in learning?"
"Are you volunteering to teach me?"
"I - uh - well, I'm not all that experienced myself, but I have experimented a little with my friends. So maybe we can teach each other?"
"Can I ask you something personal, Haoli?"
"What?"
"Do you believe in `love at first sight'?"
Notes: By popular demand, I am starting to follow the story of everyone's favorite accident-prone little brother, Seth. For those who are new to my writing, I don't plot out where my story is going beforehand. It takes on its own life. For this reason, I say I am "Following" his story, rather than writing it.
I have gotten more mail regarding Seth, than any other secondary character, and admittedly, I am kind of fond of him myself. I LOVE feedback, but make no promises to include ideas you may have - but (tease-tease!) an idea planted cannot be ignored! Please include "Seth" in the subject line if you contact me. Thanks! And Love, Steve s4d@hotmail.com