I have been informed that it would be a good idea to state a few warning comments. There may be graphic sexual scenes between men in this story, so please, if this offends you, or it is illegal or you are underaged to read such, stop here and hit your "back" button. If it is okay with you, read on and enjoy.
The end of Chapter 13:
"I love you so much!"
"Chris?"
Yeah?"
"I love you too! I still am having a difficult time rectifying it in my mind, but I know how I feel! I love you!"
So Chris is in love with Craig. They are back together. Rob loves them both, especially Chris, as a brother. Gunt got his, and yet he got some compassion. Richard bowed out gracefully, and Steve ( the author) did the weird Alfred Hitchcock thing! (if you ask me, I'll tell you!) The story could well have ended there, but so many of you asked that it continue, I decided why not. Just be warned, good novels, like good theater, don't thrive on harmony, but rather contention. And with me, maybe a good helping of corn! So by popular demand:
Chapter 14
"You look terrible, Craig." Rob said. What's the matter?"
"I went to register for next semester. My father is an alumnus here, and he made sure I could never go to school here again."
"Aw, God! That's not fair!" I said. "My dad had a hard time with my - revelation, but he's dealing with it."
"I'm gonna call my dad!" I said. "He also went to school here. He may have a little more influence, being closer."
I called home. "Dad is gone until the next week, but mom was pretty sure if one alumnus blackballs someone, no one can undo it." I explained. "But she had another idea. She has a brother in Santa Barbara. Uncle Jake has a home very close to the U.C campus there. They have a guest home separate from the main house, which my cousin Jake is living in. He's moving to Philadelphia. Jake is three years older, but was almost as close to me as a brother. We spent a few summers going back and forth between my house and his. Anyway, their guesthouse will be vacant. I just KNOW Uncle Jake and Aunt Linda will be overjoyed to have us. I don't know why I didn't think of this before!"
With the end of the semester coming near, and Craig hoping to make up a few units during the summer, we drove the half-day down to Santa Barbara the next weekend. I called and talked to Aunt Linda, and she was thrilled at the idea. She said she was going to really miss Jake and his roommate, Colin at the dinner table. I told Rob and Craig about the old lady housekeeper/cook they had who was from Jamaica or somewhere, who seemed absolutely spooky when I was a little boy. But she was a great cook. "And I'm sure both our parents," I said looking at Rob, "will be happy we are so much closer to home, too!"
"We arrived in Santa Barbara on Saturday afternoon. We were ushered into the Smith's home as if we were visiting dignitaries. "Missy Smith gonna try to make you filla place in her heart, when Jake and Colin leave!" Said Etta, the old lady who opened the door. Just then Aunt Linda came around the corner, with his Uncle Jacob a close second. I hugged my aunt and uncle fiercely.
"This is my Aunt Linda and Uncle Jacob." I said. These are my friends, Rob and Craig.
"Nice to meet you, Mr. and Mrs. Smith!" They both said almost together.
"Okay, Uncle Jake said. That's the last time you get to call us that. You can call us Uncle Jake and Aunt Lindy, or if you are not comfortable with that, just Jake and Linda will do!" Right then a girl came down the stairs.
"Carrie!" I exclaimed! "Last time I saw you, you were about 14 and I was 13 years old! You look good enough to eat! Makes me wish we were not cousins - and I was not -" She ran to me and jumped up into my waiting arms.
"Actually we're not! Last time I heard, YOU were adopted!" and she planted a wet kiss on my mouth! Rob turned red, of course! "I see, though, that you brought me some eye candy! Who are these hunks?"
"This is my - er - ?" I looked at Craig, not knowing exactly how to handle this.
He extended his hand and said, "Hi! I'm Craig, Chris's partner." He looked a little sheepish, but in a quick glance at me, I could tell he was almost proud. I felt all at once embarrassed and proud, too.
"Wo! The upfront type! I like him already!" Carrie said. "He'll fit in here just fine! Gay, huh? Well that'll make Jakey and Colin feel better about leaving the place to them!"
What!?
"Get used to that", I said to my buddies. "The whole family delight in it - even Etta!"
Just then we heard a door slamming, and a couple more sets of feet were coming down the hall under the stairs. I broke into a run, and when I got to Jake, I picked him up in my arms and danced around with him, like he was a rag doll. "Jake!!! Omigosh, it's been what - 4 or 5 years? Are you still 3 years older than I am? You look fantastic!" I lied a little. He looked kind of gaunt.
Jake didn't look as robust as Colin, his partner. We found out later was that he was fighting HIV. He was the winner, so far, but I remember him as very buff and robust when I last saw him. It was explained later that it was the medication, if anything, which was doing the most damage. They just prayed that it was doing wharever it was supposed to do. "So I hear tell you are going to Philly?"
"Well Philly is just a first stop. This is my partner, Colin." So, that was it! "We were married last year in Las Vegas. We are going to Philly, where Colin's brother Bobby and his wife and baby are. Bobby is a junior architect with a prestigious firm in PA. We are stopping there to visit and rest before going on to Vermont where I have accepted a job as a CPA."
"VERMONT!" I said. "Do they even have summer there at all?" Jake and I had spent a lot of time on the beaches around Santa Barbara.
"Not very much of it, but we can be married legally there, and we can travel as we see fit, when we miss those back home - which happily will include YOU! I'm very happy!" Jake said. "So Chris, are you - -?" He looked between me, Rob and Craig.
"Yes. But I have to say, this is - well it surely took me by surprise! You and - Colin(?) - married? Wow!" I looked at Craig, who was looking at the floor. Rob was looking totally lost and bewildered.
"OH!" I exclaimed. "And this is Rob, our roommate." Rob shook hands all around. When he got to Carrie, he stammered a hello and turned almost purple.
Completely undaunted, Carrie said, "So, Rob, you can stay in the room across the hall from my room, to give these two hunks some privacy?"
"No," Aunt Linda said, "That is a 3 bedroom house out there. Plenty of room for all three of them." She left no room for discussion.
We headed back up to Berkeley the next day. Over Craig's and Rob's vociferous objections, we were told that there would be no rent! Even I felt so - well embarrassed, first, but then blessed! This was turning out to be unbelievable! I wasn't too worried. Uncle Jake was very wealthy, and I told them he would not miss it. He would prolly figure a way to deduct it from their income before taxes.
In five weeks, our semester was over and we were all three signed up for summer courses. When we moved in, Jake and his partner were already gone. Rob promised to write to Al, but she was already dating someone else so that was probably going to be short lived.
Carrie was just a year older than Rob. He would stare at her whenever she was not looking, and he thought we were not looking. We settled in to a routine of studying. Both Craig and I had found part time jobs. Rob didn't need to work, but he took a job at a local pizzeria, just to pass the time, he said. I knew the real reason. Or reasons! First of all, he did not want to act privileged. He wanted so much to fit in. Big tall hunky Rob wanted to fit in with a couple of queers! He also wanted to stay as far away from Carrie as possible. We were talking in the living room:
"But why, Rob?" I asked. "I see you gawking at her all the time!"
"I - I'm just no match for her. When we have talked, it was not "us" talking it was her. I can never think of anything interesting to say."
"That's silly! You don't have any problem talking about interesting things to Craig and me."
"But it seems like she is always on the offensive. Too forward for me."
"Uh huh! Not shy and retiring like Al, huh?" I was being sarcastic, of course. "Look, Rob, you're shy. If you ever find a girl who is quieter than you, you will never get to know her because neither of you will ever talk! Don't avoid Carrie. You of all people, with your relationship training - or whatever it was - you should be all over this!"
"I know." He said. "I guess I miss Al. She was - desperate! I was tall enough! But now she has met a couple other tall guys."
"Plus the fact that she's up there, and you are here. You chose this. And I'm glad you did! You're my brother now, and - and I want you to find someone. And my cousin is here, and she really seems interested in you."
"Yeah, for now! Then when she gets past the shyness and finds out there's nothing behind it -"
"Don't be ridiculous! You know that's not true! You are a magnificent man!
I still get aroused just looking at you! You are big, strong and gorgeous. But more than that, you are one of the sweetest men I know. AND you're intelligent! You don't get into U.C. unless you are. Because you're not "quick" should not stop you! Spend some time with her! Get past the fear! `Just Do It'!"
"Just do what?" Craig walked in.
"ME!" I replied, and I grabbed his crotch.
"You guys are incorrigible!" Rob said, smiling and blushing.
"You're just jealous!" Craig said, as he grabbed at Rob's butt. Rob quickly jumped out of the way.
"Actually, I am, a little! I'm going for a walk. I took a break from studying and was verbally attacked by Chris, and now you are trying to rape me!"
"See, Rob? You can hold your own with us! Now go practice on her!" Rob disappeared out the door.
"What this about holding his own?" Craig said. "I wanna hold yours!"
"It's all yours, Baybay!" I said in my best imitation of Mike Meyers. Craig hated Mike Meyers!
"Take it into the other room," he said, "And I will go for a walk." He reached for the front door handle, grinning. He looked out the window. "Looks like Robbie decided not to walk far. He just went into the Smith's house."
"Hopefully to talk to Carrie. Lock the door. And follow me!" He did as he was told. Before he could get catch up to me in our bedroom, I was down to my skivvies!
"Oooo!" He exclaimed. "You look soooo good!"
"Well, that was my intention!" and I grabbed him and kissed him, while I undressed him. My boxers were the last to fall off. We stood there, au natural, admiring each other for a moment. Our manhood was emerging at the same time. Craig stepped just close enough to lean into a kiss. He lapped up and licked the tip of my nose. I giggled. He looked toward the bed.
"That's the same bed your cousin and his partner got it on in! Does that excite you?"
"No! Does it bother you?"
"NOT! But you do!" I looked at him questioningly. "This!" he said grabbing his rock hard rod. "This is very bothered by you right now."
I grabbed my own and pumped it a couple times. "I have an itch I think you could scratch." I said.
"Enough of this bullshit!" he said, as he grabbed me and pulled me in to a close bare-naked hug. "GOD, Christy, your skin is intoxicating to me!" And he pushed me on to the bed.
"Shouldn't we shower first?" I said.
"NO! Me horny NOW! Want your ass NOW. Please pass the quickie!" He deftly found the lube in the drawer, and smeared an abundance on both himself and me. I raised my legs over his shoulders. He eased his way into me. I felt full! I felt so complete! As he started to pump, I eased my legs down to a wide spread-eagle stance on the bed. I loved to be kissed while being humped. He started out slow and gentle, and worked up to a very intense orgasm. As he was nearly out of his mind in ecstasy, I came and shot all over both our chests. We didn't hear Rob come in, because the room had been well soundproofed by the former tenants. We fell asleep, him still on top of me, with the evidence of our love oozing from between us.
We didn't sleep more than a few minutes. After we showered, where we took turns sucking each other off one more time, we went out to the living room. Rob by this time was napping with an open book on his chest. "Robbie," I said gently. "You better go into your room, so you don't get a stiff neck."
He looked sleepily up at me, and extended is hand. I lifted him up from the couch and up into my arms. Craig went around to the other side. We stood there for at least five minutes. "I love you guys so much!" he said, as he extricated himself from us.
As he was closing his bedroom door, I asked, "Did you talk to her?"
"Oh yeah!" He said almost dreamily, and with a sleepy smile on his face. "Yeah, we had a nice talk. G'night!"
"Craig?" I could see something was bothering him.
"Mmm?"
I took him by the hand and led him to the couch. "How do you feel, Craig?"
"I feel - okay - ?"
"Craig, I'm not sure what real love feels like, but -"
"I know what it feels like to be rejected! Of course anger if a lot of how I feel toward my dad, but mostly it just hurts so much - to be rejected by my own dad. He didn't even leave the door open to come back if I - if I -"
"If you changed your mind?" This isn't where I was going with this at all!
"Yeah."
"About me?"
"About - everything."
"Do you think there is a chance you will?"
"Will what?"
"Change your mind - about - everything." I looked at the floor. No this was not going where I planned at all - nor where I wanted.
"Can we take this one day at a time right now, Christy? I just don't know how exactly I feel."
How could he not feel what I was feeling! We were sitting on the couch. I was sitting with my elbows on my knees, looking at the floor. He was reclined against the back of the couch, looking at the ceiling.
"Well I know how I feel. And I'm going to tell you. I love you!"
He raised up from the back of the couch, and came down to my level. I looked at him. "I love you too, Christy, undeniably more than I've ever loved anyone before!"
"So what -?"
"But that's just it! That's an empty proclamation, because I don't think I have ever loved anyone before. The closest I have come is the love I feel for my parents. And to have my dad blow it off, because of something I don't seem to have any control of - it really hurts - bad!"
"Does it feel like - well, like you can't trust anyone else - like me?" I was almost afraid of the answer.
"I just - I don't know. It's -"
"Because I want to somehow tell you - to convince you - that as I feel right now, My love for you will never stop. I think I am in love with you!"
"I think I knew that, or at least felt it, Christy. And it breaks my heart to not be able to - say for sure that I feel the same way."
"I talked a lot with Richard, when I was in the hospital. In my drugged out state, I thought I might be in love with him." Craig looked shocked. "I wasn't! I knew that the moment you came back to me. I thought I was going crazy! I thought I loved all three of you!"
"Three of us!?"
"You, Richard and Rob. I felt such a surge of emotion and love when he stepped through the door. But when you followed him in, I was sure at that moment that you were the one I wanted to - the one I loved - was in love with."
"And what did our good shrink friend think of all that?"
"I only saw him once more after I left the hospital. He said that the drug he gave me often confused emotions. Once he made it clear that he already had a lover and was only my doctor -"
"Lover? Is he gay?"
"Yeah. Well anyway, I told you my dad was - well, not happy about finding out about me. I had nothing such as you have had to deal with, but I still felt the rejection. Richard told me to write dad a letter. To tell him that I loved him no matter what, and that I really had no power to decide if I was straight or gay. It was just who I was. And am! After I wrote the letter, I was tempted to not send it. I felt so much better, that I felt I didn't need to send it. Richard told me that it was my choice, but in my case, if it were him, he would send it. So I did. Would you like to see the letter I received in return?"
He whispered, "Yeah." I got up and retrieved it.
"Dear Christopher,
First of all, I want to apologize for being so judgmental, if that's the word. That IS the word, Chris. I was being judgmental. But not only of you. It was doubly hard for me, because - I also blamed myself. I wondered what I did or didn't do, to cause you to - become that way. I wondered if it was something you - inherited, and I was only denying it in myself. I wondered if I had spent more time with you, showing you 'how to be a man'(!), would you have turned out `that way'.
I don't know the answers to all those questions, Chris. All I know is I don't care to lose one of my sons over something that I now realize neither you nor I `caused'. I love you. Forgive the letter. I realize it was rather cowardly of me, but as you know, I tend to get too defensive and confrontational in person. That said, please come talk to me any time, son.
You have my permission the remind me of what I just wrote about becoming defensive and confrontational! I will do my best to `be good'.
I love you, Christopher.
Dad"
Craig had big tears in his eyes. So did I. I re-read it over his shoulder as he read it. "I showed it to Richard. He told me I was very lucky. Not all man react in the same way, and few react quite as reasonable as my dad did. He told me most dads, whether they admit it or not, blame themselves.
"So, what if I write my dad a letter, and he just blows it off?"
"He might. According to Richard, there is a very high chance of it. But if you just write it, whether or not you send it, it is a time for clearing for YOU. If he goes to his grave never dealing with it, then you have at leaset done your part."
"Would you help me write it?"
"Right now?"
"Naw! Right now I want you to screw my brains out!"
We retired to the bedroom and closed and locked the soundproofed door. I'm sure no amount of soundproofing could have muffled my screams. I hoped Rob didn't mind, but I didn't care too much. After all, I was still on the medication!
Rob eventually moved from the room next to us, to the one on the far side of the house. "I can still hear you sometimes." He said. Then he admitted something I thought Rob would never admit:
"Sometimes when I know you guys are going at it, I try to wank and make it end at the same time. I only accomplished it once, but OMIGOSH! It was so intense listening to you while I - er - ended!" He turned deep red telling us!
I told him he was welcome to come into the room any time, so he could time it better. "No WAY! Pervert!" He said, but he had a smile on his face. Were we corrupting him?
Chapter notes: Probably! Was this cheesy or what!? Well, it's what came out of my fingers. I have no control! If you want to comment, please put "Chris" in the subject line. Thank you thank you thank you for all your continued support and encouragement! Love, Steve s4d@hotmail.com