In the days that followed, I'd given a lot of thought to what had happened that night. In fact, I'd thought of little else. I was okay with it, just surprised that I was. Compared to what Jeff and I had been doing, this stuff with Chance was very complicated and becoming more so. I was a little concerned I was getting in over my head.
The only kind of sex I'd had up to that point was heterosexual, which was much simpler than this new kind. In heterosexual sex, a man satisfies his partner in the process of satisfying himself. I was good at that and didn't have to worry about the woman. But with another man, that seemed impossible. I took. He got nothing.
Well, that's not exactly true. From his behavior, it was pretty obvious he got something out of it, a hell of a lot at times, but that was something I didn't yet understand. It still seemed so one way. I kept telling myself not to worry about it. It was his choice, so I didn't need to be concerned. But I was. I didn't want to admit I might be using him.
I'd wished many times there were someone I could discuss this with, but there was no one. And, of course, I wasn't willing to admit openly to anyone what I was doing, even Jeff. I had to learn by experience. That's what I'd done so far anyway, but maybe I could discuss it with Chance.
All I knew was I wanted to be with him again and without the feeling I was using him. That following weekend, I got the opportunity. We'd gone with a couple of other guys to a basketball game in a town nearby and gotten back pretty late that night. Chance had dropped off the other guys and saved me for last.
"What would you say about coming over to my place for awhile?" he asked, pulling away from the last stop. "Or I can take you on home, if you'd rather."
"No," I replied, "I don't have to get up early in the morning, and I'm not sleepy. Sure, let's go."
He smiled, resting his hand on my thigh as he drove, at times squeezing the bulge in my crotch. I put my hand over his, holding it still. Neither of us spoke until we were inside his apartment.
"Sorry," he said, taking off his jacket and turning on the stereo. "I don't have any juice . . . or pot, for that matter, but I've got some beer." I took off my jacket too, trying to keep from smiling.
"What! Do you think I only come over here to smoke your pot?" I replied, playfully. "Or do you think it's the juice I'm after." He looked at me, obviously surprised, and then smiled. "I may have come just to talk."
"Talk?" he exclaimed. "That's all we've done tonight, the four of us, except yell at the game a little." I slumped down on the sofa, hanging my leg over the arm.
"Yeah, but I mean about something more serious. You and me."
"Oh," he replied, seriously. "I didn't think you wanted to talk about that. Isn't that what you said you and Jeff did, or didn't do?" I didn't immediately reply. He hesitated. "Wait. We'll need a couple of beers for this," he said, going into the kitchen.
I stretched out on the sofa, leaning my head on the arm, but leaving enough room for him to sit at the other end. He came back with two beers and, sitting one in front of me, sat down, putting his feet up on the coffee table.
"Go ahead," he said, half serious. "Hit me with the bad news." I looked at him a moment, unsure how to begin. Then, taking a sip of beer, I rested my feet on his thigh.
"Are you happy, or maybe I should say satisfied with our relationship?" I asked, not looking at him. He didn't reply. "I mean, are you enjoying it and getting something out of it?"
"I sure am," he replied, quietly unlacing my sneakers and pulling one off. "Aren't you? I thought you were."
"Oh, yeah," I responded, immediately. "I am. Of course. I just wondered if you were. I don't see how you could be. Are you really?"
"You've got a hole in this sock," he said, quietly pulling my toe out of it and looking up at me.
Staring at each other, we began to laugh. I tried to kick him with that foot, but he just held it in one hand, pulling off the sock and tossing it at me. I tossed it back and, climbing on top of me, he pined me down on the sofa, his face inches from mine.
"Look. I'm not going to waste my time talking to a guy with a hole in his sock. For all I know you have one in the other sock too. Do you?" he asked. "Let's see."
Starting to wrestle to get the other shoe off, he pushed the coffee table back, and we both rolled into the floor, laughing and fighting for control. Finally I gave up, panting almost too much to speak.
"You know," he growled, "you're almost too easy. Bet you'd fight harder to keep those jeans on, wouldn't you?" I looked at him, assuming he wouldn't do it, but he did. In only minutes he had them undone and pulled half way down my legs. Then he stopped.
"Did I hear you say `uncle?'" he asked, both of us laughing loudly.
"YES!" I hollered, wrestling myself free. He stood up and extending his hand, pulled me to my feet, both of us still winded.
"I didn't know you were so strong," I exclaimed, trying to get my jeans either up or down over my legs and finally just pulling them off. He lay back on the sofa, watching me as he took a swallow beer.
"Guess there's a lot we don't know about each other," he said finally. "You didn't know I was a wrestling champion in college, did you."
I shook my head as I walked over the sofa, picking up my beer and sitting next to him. "No," I managed to get out. "What other things do I not know about you that I should?" He looked up at me.
"Well, I guess you'll have to find them out for yourself, won't you?" I looked at the floor, smiling.
"That's fair," I shrugged. "It might be fun." Then for some reason wanting to bait him into action, I said, "But I guess right now I'd better start for home." He didn't say anything.
A little disappointed, I got up, my underwear sagging on my hips, and picking my jeans up off the floor, started to put them on. He watched as I did. Then as I was about to start buttoning them, he spoke.
"You don't really have to leave, do you?" he asked, a hint of a twinkle in his eye. "We were just getting to know each other, and all."
"Yeah, well. You know, it's late." I responded, tossing the ball back to him for a response. He stared at me a moment. Then, getting up off the sofa, he knelt next to me on one knee.
"You know," he said, his hand slowly unbuttoning my fly, "I asked you to stay with me the last time you were here and you turned me down. Did you ever think I might be afraid to ask again?"
I looked at him, my heart beginning to beat rapidly as he reached the last button. Feeling my jeans slide down over my hips, my dick rapidly swelling, I realized he was dead serious.
"And if I did stay?" I asked, pushing him a bit further.
"Then we'd have a chance to find out more about each other," he replied, pulling both my jeans and underwear down over my legs, my full meat swelling immediately out against his face as he pushed his mouth into it, looking up at me to see my reaction.
Excited by the sensation, I froze for a moment, feeling his mouth sucking lightly on my meat, pushing his lips and tongue inside its fullness as he inhaled deeply. I hesitated a moment, absorbing his sexual energy until I felt myself stepping back. Then kicking my jeans and underwear off my feet, I followed him into the bedroom.
Pulling off my T-shirt as he went into his bathroom, I laid on the king size bed, pulling the top sheet partially over my naked body as I looked over the room in the dim light. When he came out of the bathroom and began to undress, I watched from the bed, never having really gotten a good look at his naked body before.
It was nice, surprisingly muscular and tanned, except the area around his groin and hips, which were white, setting off a fair amount of thick pubic hair in his crotch and trailing up his stomach. His dick was not as big as mine, but his balls were closer.
They flopped against his thighs and as he walked toward the bed. Then, gathering them up into his hand, he crawled in under the top sheet next to me, leaning against my body as reached over me and switched off the lamp, plunging us in darkness
I'd expected to immediately feel his hands or mouth in my groin, amusing himself with my meat. That was the first thing he'd done before, licking and sucking my balls and dick until it was up and begging to be sucked.
But this time I felt his full body still lying against mine, his hands moving slowly over my back and down over my butt, squeezing and fondling my cheeks. Mostly he just held me. I could feel his breath on my face as we lay facing each other on the same pillow, I think.
I was a little stiff at first, especially as he felt of my butt, his fingers at times sliding over my smooth, sensitive anus. Yet essentially I kind of liked what he was doing. I mean, holding me and rubbing my body. In time I relaxed more and more, my body fitting itself against his until I actually felt the urge to also put my arms around him. I fought the impulse at first but it was kind of nice to be held like that. I figured he might enjoy it too.
Slowly maneuvering my arms around his body, I allowed my hands to move somewhat over his warm, firm back. I was surprised how muscular it was, his lats swelling from beneath his hairy armpits, fanning out against my arms as he squeezed me more and more tightly.
It took a while for me to move my hands over his butt cheeks, but I did, reluctantly at first. They felt a lot like a woman's, but harder, much harder, and not as soft or smooth. Different.
In time I could feel his dick swelling against my stomach, even more so each time one of us would clutch the other tightly, rolling over the bed, his chest and pubic hair tickling my stomach and lower body. Soon I realized my own dick was also swelling hugely as I felt his thick pubic hair brushing against the shaft, subtly stimulating my dick and balls.
A couple of times he'd repositioned it to make it more comfortable for both of us. Eventually I did the same to his, but only once, or twice, surprised it felt much larger in my hand than I remembered it was that first time we met with Jeff.
Chance seemed to enjoy the things I'd done to him so far. I was glad, even though all I'd done was the things he'd done to me. That had worked out, but I wanted him to do more to me than we'd done so far, and I had no doubt he would. I knew he'd wind up sucking my dick. He always did.
Still, I had my doubts I'd be able to reciprocate and do that to him. It could lead to some pretty serious stuff. I'd sucked his dick a little during that three-way with him and Jeff. He'd forced me to do it. It wasn't as bad as I thought I'd be, I guess, until he'd cum in my mouth. Remembering that, I thought no, I'd better not get into that again tonight.
At one point, he pulled back enough from my body to get his hand on my then very swollen dick and began to stroke it, kind of like he was going to jack me off, but more gently. It felt pretty good, especially the way he was doing it, slowly up from the base and then massaging the sensitive head.
Lifting my dick up into the mounting sensation, I felt around for his, gripping it tightly as the sensation on mine increased. Soft and yet also quite thick and firm in my palm, it felt a little strange at first, but even stranger as it began to swell against my hand. I rolled it around against my fingers, stroking it occasionally and then steadily.
His reaction was intense, growing more audible as I continued to stroke and squeeze it with more enthusiasm. I enjoyed his reaction, especially the low moaning sounds he was making, indicating the pleasure it gave him.
I'd never done that to another guy before, not even Jeff. I'd never even touched his dick. I never wanted to. I'd held Chance's before, during that three-way, but I didn't have much choice. I hadn't wanted to back then, but I had to admit, I wanted to now, mostly, I think, because he liked it so much.
This sort of mutual masturbation continued until I think Chance was about to cum and didn't seem to want to. He'd pulled my hand off his dick several times. I'd wondered why. Then I felt his body jerk against mine and fall back on the bed next to me. I knew then he'd cum.
Neither of us spoke. He took a few deep breaths and then, turning his body around, I felt the pressure of his warm mouth slide over my dick, a jolt of sensation shooting through my groin. I jerked involuntarily, immediately feeling his hand move onto my butt, holding my dick in his mouth as he sucked it in slow, firm strokes.
I lay back on the bed, closing my eyes, enjoying the sensation. Then I felt his hand on the back of my head, squeezing and rubbing the back of my neck as he lifted my head. Suddenly I felt his dick, fat and swollen, pushing against my cheek and mouth, its moist head streaking my lips with what I assumed was his cum.
For a moment I panicked, jerking back my head back from the sensation. No, I thought, no, I can't do this. Obviously he wants me to suck it, but I don't think I can.
He waited only a second. Then returning my head to the pillow, he continued to suck on my dick. I took a deep breath, hesitating in indecision. I didn't want to make him mad, or worse yet, hurt his feelings, but I hadn't expected this, at least like it'd happened. I began to feel guilty.
I was torn what to do. My concentration shattered, my dick rapidly losing its erection. I needed to make a decision and quick. Since he'd already cum, maybe I could just hold his dick in my mouth until he'd gotten me off. I'd done that before, and it wasn't so bad. Perhaps I could even suck it a little. Yes, that's what I decided to do. I could handle that.
Leaning into his groin, I took hold of his dick, pushing my mouth down over its flushed and still swollen head, immediately tasting its sweet, sticky-moist flesh against my tongue as I held it in my mouth, feeling it twist and press against my tongue and the sides of my mouth.
Strangely enough, I actually liked holding it in my mouth, but even stranger, rather than merely holding it, I felt a compelling and irresistible urge to suck it, especially as I'd swallow the constant flow of saliva. I fought it, but not for long, eventually sucking its shaft and fat mushroom head with unexpected pleasure.
Chance was ecstatic, groaning audibly from the sensation that gripped his body. Immediately reciprocating with long, deep-throated strokes, he sucked my dick into a huge erection. At that point, everything seemed to change as things began to happen fast.
This, combined with the ever present sensation of my sucking on his dick, proved almost too much to handle. In a matter of minutes, I felt the signs of my approaching orgasm. The head becoming incredibly sensitive, I felt a ticking sensation in the head and a stream of thick sperm spurt from the slit and then stream, almost painfully into Chance's mouth, his lips closing around my shaft, this tongue swirling around it as he took my cum.
Absorbing the tension, I closed my mouth around Chance's dick also, relentless sucking his rigid shaft as I felt myself becoming quite emotional from the myriad of sensations shooting through my body and mind. Then as they seemed about to subside, I suddenly felt small pulses of something warm tickling my tongue, tasting a strange sweetness in my mouth. Then, even as he coaxed his dick from my mouth, the traces of his thick sperm lingered as he pressed me to his body. We lay back against each other on the bed, for that moment, totally spent.
I don't know how long we lay there. I'd lost track of time, having no way to measure it in the last hour or so except for the number of times Chance jerked from the not infrequent confrontations of his dick with my teeth. I wound up staying, lost in that king size bed, but found at times, during the rest of the night.
rbrown001@cox.net
Spring, 2008