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Essentially, folks, just read it if you want, and don't mess with me, please.
iTunes copyright Apple Computers, Inc.
"Cowboy Take Me Away" by the Dixie Chicks copyright Sony Music Entertainment
Copyright 2006 by smplsguy79
CATCHING LOGAN Chapter Three
Jack looked at the clock. 9:45 PM. Logan would probably arrive around 10:00. Jack took a deep breath to calm his nerves. It wasn't what he thought. It was just a bit of help on some math homework, some tutoring. He took another breath. Then he looked around the room. Ryan's side, as always, looked as if it hadn't been touched in years, it was so neat. If it weren't for the lack of dust, people might suspect that Jack was memorializing his roommate. Jack's side, as usual, looked as if his closet had thrown up. A sudden fear that Logan would see his room and leave in disgust made Jack rush around, shoving his clothes into baskets, his closet, under the bed. He quickly threw his comforter over his messed up sheets, a lame attempt at making his bed, and then turned around to survey the room again. The spree had at least neatened it up somewhat, but it would never be mistaken for spotless. Shrugging in resignation and silently cursing his inability to keep his room clean, Jack turned to the mirror and went wide-eyed. Was he really sweating? And his shirt? He dove for his closet, struggling through piles of clean and dirty clothes to find his favorite T-shirt, the one that said "My other shirt is trendy." He finally found it folded and on his closet shelves, of all places, and threw it on instead of the plain tee he'd been wearing. He also grabbed his cowboy belt, the one with the huge buckle of a brass bull and the words "Bad Ass Cowboy" embossed on the brown leather, and put that on. Better. He felt a little cooler, a little more worthy of Logan. Then, realizing he'd pulled out most of the clothing he'd had hidden, he hastily shoved them back into his closet and, with a sigh of relief, sat back in his desk chair.
Jack looked at the clock. 9:58 PM. He sighed again and turned to his desk. Yet another disaster, he shuddered at the thought of even attempting to clean it, and instead pulled out his backpack from under it, took out his Calculus, and spread it on the carpet. Pulling a pillow from Ryan's bed, he laid out and started going over his homework again, hoping that with all his nerves he'd still be able to remember what they were studying.
Jack looked at the clock. 10:05 PM. It had been a little over twenty minutes since Logan had called. He went back to his homework, hoping to make the time pass and trying not to wonder why Logan was running late.
Jack looked at the clock. 10:12 PM. Still no Logan, and Jack was starting to get antsy. Maybe something had happened, and Logan was hurt. Or maybe someone else was hurt. Or even worse, dead, and in his grief, Logan had forgotten to call. No, he had to stop that line of thinking. He was only going to drive himself crazy with thoughts like that. Jack had to get a hold of himself, calm down. It just was taking longer that he'd anticipated for Logan to walk across campus. No big deal. God, it was quiet in his room. Jack stood, went to the computer on his desk, exhumed it from its grave of papers and text books, and flipped on iTunes. A few clicks later and he was laying back down on the floor to his homework, Ben Folds Five playing quietly. Satisfied, he went back to studying. Logan would show up when he did, and there was nothing Jack could do to change that.
Jack looked at the clock, the feelings of frustration and anger finally getting the best of him. 10:25 PM. Fuck Logan, fuck his homework, and fuck waiting around. How dare he think Jack had nothing better to do than wait around for him, would just patiently whittle away the time until Logan decided to show up? He had a life, too, and Jack was damned if he was going to put it on hold for anyone, even Logan. Standing up and grabbing his jacket, he went to the door and opened it, settling on Lucas' as a place to hang. Maybe he'd figure out what he'd wanted to ask Lucas. Spring break. That was it. He'd wanted to find out what Lucas had in mind for break. True, it was two months away, but they needed to start planning now if they wanted to take a trip. A goal in mind settled Jack a bit, and he closed the door quietly, instead of slamming it like he'd planned. Locking it, he turned and looked around.
There was Logan.
He was sitting on the floor across from Jack's room, leaning against the wall with his head in his hands. He seemed to be taking deep breaths. And he was wearing an absolutely delicious black leather coat, making Jack a bit weak in the knees. He'd always been a bit of a sucker for a guy in a leather coat.
Hearing the door shutting and the click of the lock, Logan looked up. His face went a little pale. "Oh, God."
Jack wasn't quite sure what to say or what to do. In his indignation, he'd been so sure that Logan was off with his friends, having a good laugh at the fag left waiting breathlessly for him, that Jack was in no way prepared to come face-to-face with his crush sitting dejectedly outside his room. So rather than do anything, he simply waited.
Logan seemed to sense Jack's expectation, and he quickly stood. "Oh, Jack," he said, as if he were erasing the last few moments and simply acting as if he'd run into the Jack on his way out. Then Logan looked nervously at his feet.
Jack's mind raced with possible explanations, but nothing seemed to fit. So he simply asked, "Logan, what are you doing?"
Logan looked up rapidly, his eyes connecting with Jack's, and Jack felt a swift jolt of desire. They stood like that for a moment, simply staring into each other's eyes, and then Logan seemed to come back to himself, blinking and slightly shaking his head. "Jack, hey. Sorry to keep you waiting."
Confused and curious, Jack was determined not to be ignored. "Logan, what are you doing out here? Why were you sitting on the floor in front of my door while I was waiting for you?"
Logan sighed and frowned slightly, a bashful look on his face. "Oh, that. Um, well..." and he paused, seeming to search for the words. "Well, I was nervous. Kinda scared, actually."
"Scared?" Jack was even more confused now. Logan was scared?
"Yeah, scared. See..." and Logan paused again, blushing. Jack couldn't help but notice that Logan looked cute even when he was embarrassed. "Um," Logan continued, "I got to thinking on the walk over here that you might think I was kind of an idiot, asking for help. See, you're this math major, and this stuff must come easy for you, and well, I didn't want you thinking that I was dumb or anything. And then, well, I got to thinking that maybe I'd just not do it, that I'd try to figure it out on my own, but then I was already here, and you were waiting. So I got all torn, wondering if I should stay and get help or go and possibly flunk but still seem cooler to you. And then I sat down to try and figure it out. I guess I must have been out here awhile, huh? Since you're leaving and all."
Jack couldn't help it. He started to laugh. He quickly slapped his hand over his mouth to stifle it until he got control. Then he realized his anger was gone. Maybe he was taking pity on the boy before him, so worried that he might not look cool, but it didn't matter. He fought both the urge to laugh again and to hug Logan, and simply said, "I don't think you're an idiot."
Logan looked up from his shoes again. "You don't?"
"Of course not. We all need help now and then. Even us math majors. I'm just glad--" Jack stopped himself from finishing with "you asked me" and instead said "that-that I can be here for you." Then he wondered if that was actually any better, and inwardly cringed. He didn't need to drool all over Logan like he was a puppy.
Logan smiled for the first time since Jack had stepped out of his room. "Great, `cause I really need the help." Then his smile fell again. "Shit, now I feel like an idiot for thinking that you'd think I was an idiot."
A laugh escaped Jack again, and he grinned. "Logan, you're not an idiot. Now, if you want me to help, which I'm glad to do, then let's go into my room. If not, you're free to take off, no harm done."
Their eyes met once more, and Jack's heart started to play hopscotch along his ribs. Rather than say anything, Logan grabbed his backpack from the floor at his feet and nodded towards Jack's door. Trying not to fumble and lose his keys, Jack hastily unlocked his door and let Logan in.
"And now that you've done all that, you can simply solve for `x'."
Jack was having a bitch of a time concentrating. Things had started simply, with them sitting across from each other on the floor, homework before them, as Jack worked Logan through their next assignment problem by problem. Then, on problem four, he'd slid over to sit next to Logan so he could see better, both of their backs against Jack's bed and their homework on their knees. But when Logan had shifted even closer--problem ten--so that they were almost touching, Jack began to sweat and have issues remembering what they were working on. And when he sat down again at a decent distance after putting on some soft music, Jack was surprised when Logan once again moved close enough to be brushing shoulders.
"So `x' equals the square root of three, right?"
"Huh?" Jack snapped back, though his thoughts of Logan's kisses were still distracting him. "Square root of three? Let me check the answer I got." He made a bit of a show flipping back to his completed assignment to hide his slightly trembling hands. "Yep, that's what I got."
"Sweet." Logan smiled at Jack, a glow in his eyes. "I think I'm getting this. Here, let me do the next one on my own to make sure."
Jack flashed a smile of his own. "You got it. Let me know if you have any problems."
Logan began to scribble into his notebook, intently working out the equation. Jack tried to watch, but couldn't help it as his mind once more began to wander to Logan throwing his books aside and pulling him into an embrace. His eyes closed at the image, and a shiver ran through his body. God, he wanted Logan in the worst way.
"Done. I got five-thirds." Logan looked at his expectantly.
Jack checked his finished problem. "That's it."
"Yes." Logan looked back at his assignment. "I'm done. And I got it."
Jack laughed. "You got it."
"Man, you're the greatest. I actually understood what the hell I was doing." Logan turned his gaze to Jack, their eyes again connecting. "Thanks."
Jack swallowed, hoping to put his heart back into place. "You're welcome."
Logan turned halfway, his chest now against Jack's shoulder as he looked at the clock sitting on the shelf over the bed. "Eleven-thirty. Not bad. But I should probably go, let you sleep for class in the morning." He turned back and began gathering his books.
Jack's mind raced. He knew he didn't want Logan to leave, but he wasn't sure how to keep him from going. "I don't have class in the morning," he blurted, lying through his teeth. But it was only Intro to American Lit, and they'd just taken a quiz. There wouldn't be anything going on he couldn't get from someone else.
"You don't? Neither do I. Tomorrow's my easy day. Just Calc and Theater in the afternoon."
Jack smiled, feeling as if he'd gotten the fish to take the bait. "Well," he said, standing and walking over to his computer to play with the music, "you're more than welcome to stay and hang out if you want."
Logan looked at the clock again, seeming a bit hesitant. Jack stopped breathing mid-inhale, waiting to see what Logan would do. "Sure, I don't have anything to do. Might as well stay where I'm at. Besides, it'll be a good chance to learn a bit about you."
Jack halted, his hand over the mouse. "Learn about me? There's not much to tell, really."
Logan came over to lean against his desk, facing Jack. "Oh, come on. There's got to be some dirty little secrets I should know about."
"Secrets?" Jack started to panic. Did Logan know about his crush. Oh, God, he might know.
"Yeah, like where did you go last year? I used to see you around, and then you disappeared for awhile. And then suddenly, you were back. Are you like some spy, rushing off to do the government's bidding, and school is just your cover?" Logan smirked, joking.
Jack's nervousness evaporated, replaced with a sinking feeling. "Oh, that."
Logan must have sensed the mood change. "Did I say something wrong? You're not really a spy, are you? Because that would just be too hilarious...and also a bit weird." Logan laughed self-consciously.
"No, I'm not a spy." Jack was suddenly trying to fight tears. How could he still have tears, after all he'd cried? He couldn't believe he could still feel that much grief after almost a year.
"Oh, hey. What's wrong? If I said something, man, I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."
"No big deal. You didn't know."
"Seriously, man. Don't blow me off. What's up? I want to help if I can. Hey, you helped me, so it's the least I can do."
Jack sighed, sitting down on his desk chair. "There's really nothing to do. It just happens now and then. Sorry you had to see that." He attempted a smile and almost sold it. Almost.
"Jack." Logan said his name so firmly, Jack finally looked him in the eye. "Tell me."
Jack relented and choked back the lump in his throat. "My dad died last year, so I went home for awhile."
"Oh, God," Logan whispered, his hand going to his mouth. "I didn't know. I'm so sorry."
"Don't worry about it. It's not your fault."
"But it had to be awful."
Jack closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Yeah, it was."
Logan suddenly stood and pulled Jack from his chair. "Come here." And he pulled Jack into a hug. Jack melted against him, relishing the comfort. The tears retreated, and he sighed again, feeling a little better. And then he froze. Logan Hemphill was hugging him. He was hugging Logan Hemphill. He could feel Logan's strong arms wrapped around him, his cheek against Logan's cheek. Thoughts of his father were gone as quickly as they'd come, leaving him in the arms of the one boy he'd wanted since before his father had died. The feel of Logan's chest touching his was incredible. He thought he might even feel Logan's heartbeat. And was it him, or was it beating fast? Or maybe that was just his. Either way, he was enjoying the touch. Logan's hands moved, rubbing his back, and Jack exhaled a breath he hadn't been aware he'd been holding.
"You okay?" Logan asked, his cheek still against Jack's, his breath warm on Jack's ear.
Jack nodded, unable to form the words to answer.
Logan pulled back to look at Jack, still holding the embrace. "You sure?"
"Yeah," Jack replied. "I'm sure."
"Good." Logan pulled Jack close again. "I'm glad you told me."
Jack took a moment more to savor their hug. "So am I."
And then it was over. Logan leaned back against the desk, leaving Jack awkwardly standing before him, unsure of what to do. So Jack sat back down and began to play with iTunes again. He couldn't decide on a song to play, so he hit shuffle and let fate and programming make the decision for him. Suddenly the Dixie Chicks came playing through the speakers, and Jack cringed. While he loved country, it just didn't seem cool with Logan around, wasn't as cool as Logan's clothes and confidence. He was about to change the song when Logan cocked his head.
"The Dixie Chicks? I didn't peg you as a country fan."
"Yeah," Jack replied, embarrassed. "I like some of it."
"Cool."
Jack was mildly shocked. Country was cool? He let the song play.
"This is a great song." Logan declared. Jack was trying to figure out if he meant it or was just being polite when Logan began to sing along. "I said, cowboy, take me away. Fly the girl as high as you can into the wild blue. Set me free, oh, I pray. Closer to heaven above and a closer to you. Closer to you." Logan's rich baritone seemed to melt seamlessly into the music, and Jack sat back, transfixed. He'd never imagined that Logan was a singer, much less good.
When the song was over, having sung along to the rest of the lyrics, Logan took a breath and smiled. Then he seemed to remember where he was and who he was with, and he blushed a deep red. "Oh, my God. I can't believe I just did that."
"Don't be sorry," Jack said. "I enjoyed it."
Logan looked skeptical. "Really?"
"Really."
"I still can't believe I just sat here and sang along like that, especially in front of you."
Jack gave him a quizzical glance. "What do you mean, `especially in front of me?'"
Logan blushed again and moved to look out the window. "I just meant that I hardly know you, and here I am, singing my heart out in front of you. Kinda embarrassing."
Jack stood and approached Lucas, standing next to him and looking out at the night. "Hey, I just nearly bawled on your shoulder. Don't be ashamed of a little singing. Besides, I enjoyed it."
"You did?"
"Yeah. You've got a great voice."
Logan turned to look at Jack. "Thanks."
Jack caught Logan's gaze, and again they were caught in a moment. Jack couldn't take his eyes away. Logan wasn't breaking the stare, either. "No problem."
"Hey, did I tell you I liked your belt?"
"You do?" Jack asked.
"Yeah, I do. Kinda fits in with the song, huh?"
Jack chuckled a bit. He was amazed they were still staring at each other. "Yeah, I guess so."
Logan gave him a slight smile. "I'm gonna be cheesy for a moment. That okay?"
"Sure."
"Cowboy, take me away."
"Huh?"
"Cowboy, take me away."
The look was still unbroken, but Jack felt he had to ask, had to make sure. "Are you telling me what I think you're telling me."
"Yeah, I am." And then Logan was moving closer, and Jack felt himself drawn it. Their lips met, softly, and Jack felt his head begin to swim while his heart decided it was the perfect moment to play a drum solo. Jack's arms slid around to Logan's back, pulling him nearer, while Logan put his hand to Jack's face. The kiss took on more passion as they became less tentative, and Jack dimly became aware that something major was going on. Logan's lips were soft, but strong, and they felt amazing. And then their mouths were open, and their tongues met, withdrew, and clashed again. Jack felt joy, a joy he hadn't felt in so long, and he was getting burned by Logan's slight stubble. He didn't care. He was getting exactly what he wanted. Jack Leider was kissing Logan Hemphill.
Of course, Ryan would pick that exact moment to return to the room.
TO BE CONTINUED
So, there it is. Took me awhile, I know, but them's the apples when life intrudes. Hope you enjoyed it. If you did or did not, let me know: smplsguy79@yahoo.com