All rights reserved. Copyright held by the author. If you are underage or are offended by gay fiction, containing graphic sex and explicit language, please exit now.
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"BRIARWOOD"
Copyright Ritchris, 2005
aka "Whence Cometh My Help"
Copyright Ritchris, 2003
Revised Version
A dramatic saga
by
Ritch Christopher
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BOOK EIGHT
"UNTO THE HILLS"
Chapter-Eighty-two
"Sometimes people leave you
halfway through the wood..."
Stephen Sondheim
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Only Jeff flew down from Mackintosh to Briarwood for Ryan's wake, leaving Johnny behind with their twin sons, also with Johnny's cousin, Steve and Steve's lover, Wade. Alex, Jeff's brother and his lover, Ted. were to fly down in a couple of days for the funeral.
Ryan's body was being prepared for viewing at Kimberly Funeral Home as Cliff, Roger, Troy, Jay, and now Jeff sat with Kyle in Kyle's living room. Little Pete and Danny were watching Disney videos in the den.
The living room was somber. Everyone there had cried and was trying to accept the fact that one of them was missing. They'd never lost a Briarwood Boy before...at least the close-knit group in the fraternity. All their eyes seemed to shift from one to another in the room, each communicating sadness through love and understanding that one day it would be their turn and who would be left behind then?
Kyle's eyes were puffy. He looked tired and weak. He had only been home from Ryan's hospital room a couple of hours when Dr. Clay Lawson called him from Cole to tell Kyle that Ryan had passed away. 'Passed away'...God, how Kyle hated that phrase and always had. WHERE did a person pass away to? What passed away? A soul? The pumping of the heart? The inhalation and exhalation of air in the lungs? What the fuck did 'passed away' mean? A few weeks ago, Ryan and Kyle had watched Sean Penn in "21 Grams". Each of them assumed it was a movie about cocaine or grams of an illegal substance, but as it turned out, the '21 grams' was the amount of weight the human body loses when it takes its final breath and dies. The subject was serious and Ryan had wondered if it would upset Kyle, so he joked, "Do you think anyone will notice I'm thinner when I go?" Kyle tried to dismiss Ryan's remark because at the moment, Ryan's impending death was months away, long after their trip with the kids to Europe, Africa, India, and any place else as long as Ryan felt like continuing the journey.
Then, this past weekend when his illness and pain became so acute and had fallen in the bathroom. Though neither Ryan nor Kyle spoke of it, they both were aware that Ryan's situation was serious...more serious than either wanted to admit to himself and to his lover. Dr. Whitman had warned Ryan and Kyle that he would have occasional lapses of weakness, but with time and rest, he could probably rally back with some amount of normalcy. But Ryan did NOT rally; it was if he just vanished. Poof! He was gone...and now a few hours later, Ryan's body had been removed from the morgue to Kimberly's. Cliff and three of the Briarwood boys were sitting with Kyle to comfort him. Through a multitude of held-back tears, Kyle spoke to them.
"I'm sorry Father Cliff, I know I have to tell the kids, but I just can't. Whatever I say is going to be like a double barrel shot gun aimed at them. First they must know about Ryan's death. I can't fathom how either boy will take the news since all of us were so close. And if that weren't enough and they can accept Ryan no longer being with us, they'll realize that the trip the four of us had planned will have to be cancelled. I just don't know what to do?" Kyle explained to his Briarwood family.
"Kyle," Cliff spoke, "I'll talk to them if you like or I'm sure that Jeff will. Perhaps, hearing the news from either of us might soften the blow. I know how upset you are, as we ALL are. But, accepting the news of one parent's death always seems to put fear into a child's mind that there's the danger he might lose the other parent. That's why I believe when YOU'RE ready to talk with them; you must remain calm but strong. They have to know that you're healthy and in control of everything...that you're not going to die and leave them. If you approach them with tears, they sometimes sense that you're weak and can't handle the situation no matter how much grief you feel."
"I...I guess you're right. One of you should tell them for me. I need all of your advice on whether I should let them attend the funeral."
Cliff looked at Jeff..."Well, Father...who's it going to be? You or me?"
"You think I should do it, Cliff?" Jeff asked with reservation.
"Very frankly, yes. You're younger and closer to their ages, and they just might take it better hearing it from you."
"OK, I will...on one condition."
"What's that, son?"
"That the whole time I'm in the den talking to them, you'll be praying for me in here...asking God to give me the right words to say."
"That's not a condition, Jeff, it's an assumption. Of course, I will."
Jeff got up from the couch and headed for the den. As he started to leave through the living room door to go down the hall, Kyle stopped him.
"Jeff?" Kyle said.
"Yeah, bro?"
"Thank you."
"I love you, Kyle. I always loved Ryan and you, almost as I did my real brother, Alex. I love Danny and Little Pete almost as much as I love my own two kids. We've all...always been a family and if the day should come when someone needs to talk to my little Roger or little Cliff, I think you would do the same for me."
On his way down the hallway, Jeff said a short quiet prayer, made the sign of the cross and entered the den. Danny and Little Pete saw Jeff at the same time and ran to him, excitedly, screaming, "Uncle Jeff! Uncle Jeff!" Pete jumped up in Jeff's arms and began plying Jeff's cheeks with kisses as Danny grabbed Jeff around the leg and hugged, tightly as he could.
"Hey, big guys, you're growing like corn stalks! Little Pete, you've gained almost a ton. I'd say at least eight pounds!"
"I bet I'm two inches taller, Uncle Jeff," exclaimed Danny.
"Oh, I say two and a half inches, maybe even two and three-quarters."
"Why did you come down from New Hankshire? Did Uncle Johnny come with you? Did you bring Little Roger and Little Cliff, too?"
"No, I came down by myself. Your Uncle Johnny stayed with the twins in New HAMPSHIRE, not Hankshire. Say it...Hamp...shire."
"Hamp...SHIRE!" Danny echoed. "There's somethin' I've been wanting to ask you, Uncle Jeff?"
"What is it?"
"If YOU and Uncle Johnny are my uncles, does that make Little Cliff and Little Roger, Petey's and my cousins?"
"It sure does. Did you figure that out all by yourself?"
"Uh huh."
"See, you're not only growing taller, you're getting smarter every day...which brings to mind, how are you liking school, Danny?"
"Fine...and Miss Martindale, my teacher thinks I'm the smartest kid in her class."
"Did she tell you that herself?"
"No...but I kinda figured that out, too. I've certainly read more books than any other kid. My two daddies make me and Petey read every night before we go to sleep."
"Petey, are you reading, too?"
Before Little Pete could answer, Danny butted in by saying, "He's a good reader. He's only in kindergarten but he knows his ABC's and can write...not PRINT...but write like grown ups. I have my primer, my reading book, and Petey's already smart enough to read the last chapter with the big words."
"You two are quite something!" Jeff said, looking at the two tykes. "Is that a DVD you're watching?"
"Peter Pan," Petey said. "It's my favorite...he and I have the same name...'Peter'."
"We got all the Disney movies," Danny said.
"Oh, what's your favorite if Danny's is 'Peter Pan'?"
"Well, I'm not a little kid any more, but I still like 'Bambi' with Thumper and Flower."
This was the opening Jeff had prayed for. Surely, God had heard his cry for help coming down the hall.
"How many times have you watched 'Bambi'?"
"I don't know. Petey and I must've seen it a hundred times or more."
"Then you probably know the story by heart, then?"
"Petey and I can just about say the whole movie from memory. We do that sometimes when we go to bed. He's Thumper and I'm Bambi."
"Let me ask you something...you know at the early part of the movie when the fire starts and all the little animals run for cover?"
"Yes, that's right after the hunter shoots Bambi's mother."
"Then you probably know she didn't make it out of the woods..."
"Of course not, Uncle Jeff. She was dead."
"You know what 'dead' means?"
"Sure, that's when you leave the people you love and go to live in heaven."
"Do you think Bambi missed her?"
"Yes, but he'll see her again when he goes to heaven."
"Then, you don't think Bambi got angry when his mother left him?"
"She just left him for a while. She died...and one day Bambi will die. We're all gonna die some day. That's what Father Cliff says on Sundays."
"You really got it all, down pat, don't you?" Jeff asked, feeling a bit relieved.
"Yes. Daddy Ryan is sick in the hospital and he may die after we get home from our trip."
"Did your Daddy Ryan tell you that?"
"Sure, he just didn't want Petey and me to think he's gonna leave us on purpose. He's just gonna go see God and get things ready for Daddy Kyle and me and Petey when it's our turn to join him."
Jeff took a deep breath, closed his eyes for an instant to pray for another ounce of strength. "Uh...Petey could you turn the sound down on the TV for a minute?"
"Sure, Uncle Jeff," Petey replied, reaching for the TV remote.
"Peter Pan" was silenced and the two toddlers looked at Jeff.
"Danny...Petey," Jeff began bravely, "The reason I came down from New Hampshire was to see both of you and to be with your Daddy Kyle."
"AND Daddy Ryan in the hospital?"
"Your Uncle Cliff called me to tell me that your Daddy Ryan had...had...gone to see God, sooner than he planned."
"He's gone?" Danny asked, his face tuning up to cry. "He didn't even say goodbye?"
"Danny, you've heard your two dads talk about the Briarwood Boys? Well, you and Petey are LITTLE Briarwood Boys...and the one thing that Briarwood Boys don't like to do is say goodbye...ever. You know saying, 'goodbye' can get all mushy and gushy. We just don't do it. We like to say, 'hello' much better. That's why your Daddy Ryan didn't say goodbye...he didn't even say goodbye to your Daddy Kyle...Even I didn't say goodbye to Johnny or Little Cliff and Roger when I left them this morning. I have the comfort knowing they'll greet me at the door of my house when I get back home with a big 'Hello' and dozens of hugs and kisses like the ones you gave me a few minutes ago."
"Then, Daddy Ryan is already in heaven waiting to say 'Hello' to us?"
"When the time comes...but not now! He knew that Daddy Kyle would stay with you until then. Daddy Kyle is going to be with you a long, long time. Only, Daddy Kyle lived with your Daddy Ryan longer than you and Petey...and he's gonna miss Daddy Ryan much more than the two of you. Daddy Kyle is very sad about Daddy Ryan leaving...and he's gonna need you two guys to cheer him up and make him feel not so lonely."
"We can do that, Uncle Jeff. You said it yourself, we're almost grown up."
"Your Daddy Kyle is gonna need you to do a few extra things around the house. I think it would be great if you told Daddy Kyle that you love him from time to time...you know, climb up in his lap, give him hugs and kisses."
"And I can read to him at night when he goes to bed," Petey added.
Petey's remark choked Jeff up for the first time. His emotions had remained steady so far. He didn't want the kids see him cry, so he got on his knees and hugged both boys, hiding his own sorrow. "Come on, give me some hugs and kisses. You can practice on me the way you're gonna do to Daddy Kyle. Jeff stayed in the embrace until he felt he could continue his discussion.
"Now, I want to talk to you about something else."
"Okay," the boys replied in unison.
"I remember way back when...you had a parakeet named...what WAS his name?"
"Tweety."
"That's right, 'Tweety'...and I remember one day you found Tweety lying in the bottom of his cage. He...had died...and your dads explained to you what a funeral was."
"Yes, Daddy Ryan gave us a box he kept his cuff links in and we put Tweety inside."
"Yes, and I believe it was you, Danny, who called me on the phone and asked it I would say a few words at Tweety's funeral...and I did."
"Then we buried him in the back yard between two rose bushes."
"And then I said a prayer for Tweety to find his way to heaven to live with all the other birds who had died."
"Uh huh."
"Well, the day after tomorrow, we're going to have a similar funeral for your Daddy Ryan...only it's gonna be at Uncle Cliff's church and there's gonna be lots of people there you knew you daddy...and then...well... we're...gonna bury Daddy Ryan way back on Uncle Cliff and Uncle Roger's back lawn where another very young Briarwood Boy is buried. His name was Kendall, and although Kendall and your Daddy Ryan never met here on earth, I suppose they've met by now in heaven and have become good friends and the two of them can lie together side by side."
"That's good. Neither of them will be lonely, then."
"Okay...now do you understand everything? Is there anything either of you want to ask me?"
Both shook their heads, 'no'.
"Now, then, you can watch the rest of 'Peter Pan' and when it's finished, come on into the living room and be with your Daddy Kyle."
"Can we go give him a hug now?" Danny asked.
"Yes, Danny, I think he would like that. Let me go talk with him for just a minute and you guys follow after me."
Jeff stooped to kiss each boy on his forehead and left the den to return to the living room. Everyone there looked at Jeff as he entered. Jeff closed the door and pressed his back to it and very quietly said, "It's done."
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Having no desire to learn what had happened to his now, former girlfriend, Carolyn, Hal Carter never called anyone in Hawthorne after he'd left his brother Noah, at Baylor Academy for Boys. Nor had he heard that Noah had been killed and buried. The day he left Noah in Chattanooga, he flipped a coin four times to set his sights on which way to go. The decision was to go north and he headed his car in that direction.
He was free from cares; from girlfriends, from friends in general after learning that his best pal, Steve, had suddenly announced he was gay. Steve's homosexuality remained a mystery to Hal, as his brother Noah's desire for the same sex. Sucking on a dick or getting fucked in the ass by another guy was not comprehensible to Hal.
The night in the Atlanta motel room...the last night he'd spent with Noah kept haunting Hal. In a weak moment, Hal had left Noah go down on him and just before reaching a climax, Hal had cried out to Noah, calling him, "Steve" the name of his best friend. Hal had asked himself over a thousand times, why had he done that...not letting his brother perform oral sex on him, but had he imagined or even hoped that it was Steve between his legs and not his brother.
In Hawthorne, Hal and Steve were best buddies for nearly their entire lives. They had skinny dipped in the lake together, slept in the same bed together many times...even nude and not once...NEVER had it ever occurred for Hal to even think of having male sex with his best friend. A bunch of their gang had beat off by the pond together, but Hal never touched one of them, let alone had a desire to have sex with them.
It was even more mystifying to learn that his two other buddies, Randy and Tyler had secretly been having sex all along without anyone knowing about it. Then, Steve ran off somewhere with another friend, Wade to live happily ever after as a couple. Hal felt he'd never known any of his pals...or even his brother...Steve, Randy, Tyler, Wade, and Noah. Had the whole world turned queer suddenly? Had President Clinton's "Don't ask...Don't tell" policy become the order of the day in the mountains of Carolina?
But, still, Hal had grown tired of the countless nights of pussy in the back seat of his car...or any place private he could find in and around Hawthorne. He must've had sex with every girl in his high school before graduation, not to mention all the whores and loose women in the town who had heard of Hal's rather large organ. Sometimes Hal felt as if he had a town landmark in the crotch of his jeans and every female in the county wanted to see.
Yet, he couldn't forget the way he felt when his brother went down on him. It was the first and only time ANY male had ever done this to him. Was it because it was his brother or was it because his brother did it so well? As he drove from Tennessee through across a corner of Kentucky, taking a detour toward Virginia and West Virginia. When he stopped for the night, he was tired and wasn't sure which state or county he was in. The last highway sign he remembered said something about Briarwood...but, Briarwood where? Virginia? Ohio? Maryland? Hal didn't know and didn't care. He felt as if he had no friends in the world, no one to call, no one to answer to, so what difference did it matter where the fuck he was. He had several credit cards and a couple of thousand dollars he could retrieve from any ATM. As he entered Briarwood, he looked for an all night diner and a place to sleep. Tomorrow he would get a couple of road maps and choose the direction of his journey.
There were no diners in sight in downtown Briarwood, but he did see a Denny's Restaurant, which served breakfast 24/7. The idea of stopping there suited Hal's appetite. There were less than half dozen cars in the parking lot and Hal assumed he could grab a fast meal and ask someone in the restaurant where to find a nearby motel. He entered and looked for a table next to a person who might supply him with information. In the far corner sat a single guy, about Hal's age, maybe a few years older, who could be a likely prospect to tell him what he wanted to know. Hal sat down in a booth next to the young man and sat on the seat facing him. The young man appeared to be deep in thought and made no attempt for eye contact. A waitress, a real looker, came to Hal's table with a glass of water and a menu.
"Good morning, sir," the waitress addressed Hal.
"Mornin' ma'am," Hal answered with his Carolinian accent.
"Can I get you some coffee or juice while you're deciding on your order?"
"Coffee, please, cream and sugar...oh, I see there's cream and sugar already on the table here."
"I'll be back in a jiff," she replied and left.
Every item on the menu looked good to Hal. He might even eat TWO breakfasts to satisfy his hunger. After deciding on what to order, he focused on the young man in the next booth trying to get his attention. He stared, smiled, coughed; all the usual things, but the young man still ignored him. 'Well, at least he's not gay,' Hal thought, 'otherwise he would look at me."
The waitress reappeared with a cup and a gold and black plastic carafe containing hot coffee. Hal thought she might think he was stupid to order two meals at the same time, instead he opted for a western omelet and toast with a side order of link sausage. He would order the second breakfast once he had finished the first. On his table were small triangular paper folds advertising various desserts or special items not on the regular menu. Hal took his time reading every word on every ad, all the while, trying to catch the young man's attention.
Out of desperation, Hal decided to speak to the young man.
"Excuse me, sir..." Hal said in a medium voice and got no response. He raised the volume for a second attempt. "EXCUSE ME, SIR..." This time the young man noticed Hal.
"Uh...yes?"
"I...I was wonderin' if you knew of a motel or a hotel nearby where I could rent a room for the night?"
"There are none in the downtown district, but there are quite a few motels on the north side of town...on the highway just outside the city limit."
"Thanks. I've been drivin' all day and I think my achin' body has reached its limit for one day. I thought I'd get a bite to eat, find some place to sleep, and then head on out later in the day."
"It's best not to drive if you're tired and sleepy. I know my limit too and I always stop when I'm traveling. A little rest can assure you that you'll be more apt to arrive at your destination. How far did you travel?"
"I don't rightly know five or six hundred miles, I guess...all the way from Tennessee."
"Is that your home?"
"Nah, I'm from Smoky Mountain country in the Carolinas...a little town called 'Hawthorne'."
"Hawthorne?" The young man became interested.
"Yeah,"
"Just how large is the town?"
"A few thousand people, just small enough for everyone to know everybody's business...especially if it doesn't concern them."
"Do you know most of the people who live there?"
"I bet I know all of them. I've probably dated every legal aged girl in the whole town...some of their momma's too! By the way, I'm Hal Carter. Do you live here in this town?"
"I used to. I live in New Hampshire now. Incidentally, my name is Jeff Clayton." Jeff purposely chose not to reveal he was a priest. He didn't feel like talking about religion to a stranger this early in the day.
"I don't know where New Hampshire is. I get all those northern states mixed up. I just know it's way up there somewhere close to Canada."
The young man to whom Hal had struck up a conversation was indeed Jeff. His little episode in Kyle's den with Petey and Danny had drained him emotionally. He had called Walter, his father, to tell him he was going to grab a quick bite before coming to his old home to sleep. After saying good night to Cliff, Roger, and the other Briarwood boys, he drove down to Denny's around 1:00 AM to gather his thoughts and to let the happenings of the day sink into his psyche. He was tired and missed Johnny and the twins. He took a seat in the far corner of the restaurant hoping that none of his former friends or old classmates would recognize him. He just wanted to be alone. He didn't know who Hal was and chose to ignore him until Hal intruded into his thoughts and began to ask questions. Little did he know how much he knew about Hal until the conversation proceeded.
"It's beautiful country up there like your Carolinas...lots of green mountains."
"I hope you don't mind my gettin' nosy, but are you travelin' through here the same as me?"
"No, a friend of mine died and I came down for the funeral."
"Damn! How I hate funerals. The last one I went to was my dad's and I was just a little kid back then, I decided then and there I didn't want to go to any more of them."
"They're not fun. That's for sure."
"Your friend? Was he sick or was he involved in some kind of accident?"
"He'd been ill for quite some time."
"Oh, an older guy..."
"No, just a few years older than I."
"Damn, that's too bad."
"Uh, I was about to ask you about your hometown, Hawthorne,"
"Yes, what about it?"
"I recently had two young guys move into my house from Hawthorne."
"You gotta be shittin' me! Are you serious?"
"Yes."
"Well, for cryin' out loud, tell me their names, I'm sure as hell bound to know them."
"The older of the two is named Steve Jarvis and the younger is Wade English."
Hal was stunned. He couldn't say a word. This HAD to be a dream which had turned into a nightmare...and soon he would wake up to reality.
"Do you know them?" Jeff continued.
"Uh...ah...no...I don't believe I do. There were some kids who lived over in the next holler that I never got to know too well. They could be some of them." Hal lied.
"I guess in a way, I'm relieved that you DON'T know them. It would have been just too much of a wild coincidence. It seems this whole day has been filled with déja vu."
"This Steve and Wayne...?"
"Wade,"
"Sorry, this Steve and Wade...are they livin' in New Hampshire now?"
"They're living with me and my family temporarily."
"Oh, you have a family? A wife and kids?"
"A...a partner and TWO kids...twins."
"Oh, you mean you aren't married?"
"No, I AM married...but I don't have a wife."
"Excuse me?"
"My partner is a he."
"Oh, you're...you're...?"
"Go on, say it! Gay! Yes, my partner and I are gay."
"Then, this Steve and Wade you mentioned, are...are they...?"
"Yes, they're a gay couple."
"Damn! What the fuck has happened to straight guys in this world. Is there something in the water? Some kind of plague or an epidemic?"
"You have a problem with gay people?"
"NO, not at all. My brother is gay...honest. I have nothing against gays. It's just that everywhere I look...all my best friends back home... suddenly woke up one mornin' and they had all turned gay overnight almost."
Jeff laughed and his attitude toward Hal became friendlier. He stood up from his booth and walked over to join Hal in his booth. "Hal, that's not the way it works. You just don't go to sleep one night and wake up to find you like guys instead of girls."
"Well, that's the way it seemed. I mean one weekend my best friend and I were double dating fucking two girls in my car...and the next weekend, I find out he wants to fuck my brother."
"Did he? Did he...uh...fuck your brother?"
"No, he fucked Wade instead!" Damn it to hell! Hal had slipped up big time by mentioning Wade.
"Hal, your best friend's name was Steve, huh?"
"I'm sorry...sorry I tried to lie. Only I was afraid if you thought I knew Steve and Wade, you'd think I was queer too...but when you said you were...I didn't know how to get out of all the lies I'd told."
"Hal, putting two and two together and knowing now that Steve was your best friend, then I can only assume you're Noah's brother...and I'm so sorry. I know it was a great shock to you."
"Wait a minute! What the fuck are you talking about?"
"Hal, skip the pretense! I was home when my partner received the call about Noah being killed."
"NOAH! MY NOAH! DEAD?"
Jeff, all but gasped at his blunder.
"Oh Hal, please forgive me. I had no idea you didn't know about your own brother."
"What do you mean 'dead'? How? When?"
Jeff wanted to run out of Denny's and scream. Just a few hours ago, he had to tell Danny and Petey about their father's death...and to borrow from Yogi Berra's famous philosophy, it was déja vu all over again. Now, he was in a situation where he had to tell Hal about his brother's rape and murder as Johnny had described it to him. Looking back in the past few days, he had to break sad news to Steve or Wade, earlier that night to Danny and Pete...and now, Hal. He felt like Job in the Bible or maybe Pharaoh in Egypt. What was to come next, the frogs, the locusts, or the boils?
Jeff chose not to go into vivid detail concerning Noah's death to Hal. He would tell him the basics and try to answer any of Hal's questions, to the best of his knowledge.
Once again, Jeff changed his seat. This time he moved to the same side of the booth to sit next to Hal. What he had to say, he wanted no one to hear it but Noah's brother. Jeff took a chance hoping Hal's manliness would take hold of his emotions and Hal wouldn't be so demonstrative with his grief or anger.
Just as Jeff was about to relate what he knew about Noah, the waitress arrived with Hal's order of food. Dutifully, she got a coffee cup and placed it before Jeff as she had done when Jeff first arrived. She poured some fresh coffee for each of them before leaving.
"NOW, tell me, please!" Hal said despairingly, his voice was just above a whisper. "Tell me what happened to my brother."
Jeff started by telling Hal about the calls he and Johnny had received from Steve's mother with the news about Noah. He told him about Steve and Wade being in New York and how he and Johnny decided it was best to wait until Steve and Wade arrived in Mackintosh before relating the news to them.
The whole time Jeff was narrating the incident, the expression on Hal's face changed with each new sentence...from shock to anger to hurt ending with tears coming down Hal's face.
"My God, Jeff, I had no idea. I hadn't heard a word. Noah and I spent the weekend together in Atlanta and became closer than we'd ever been. I took him back to school, just outside of Chattanooga, Tennessee and that's the last time I saw him. He must've been murdered the next day or the day after. God, I feel so bad."
"I am so sorry that you had to hear the news from me...in this way. There's more than a touch of irony about your coming into Denny's at the same moment that I'm sitting here...and the fact that we met and I had a message that was supposed to be delivered to you. It's as if God meant everything to happen tonight."
"I don't go in for much religion," Hal said. "Do you?"
Jeff smiled, "Hal, I'm afraid I have to. Religion is my profession."
"What do you mean?"
"Back home in Mackintosh, New Hampshire, I'm a priest by profession."
A chill went through Hal, causing him to shiver.
"Holy shit!" Hal exclaimed. "You ARE real, aren't you? I mean you're not some kind of angel like in the movies where God sends an angel when he has something special to say to someone?"
"Hal, I'm very much real and alive. Did you ever hear of angels drinking coffee at Denny's at two-thirty in the morning?"
Hal cracked a slight grin, "No, I guess not." Then he became very serious, "Tell me, Jeff did they catch the guy? Did they find out who killed Noah?"
"The last I heard...no. But, I'm sure if you call the detective division in Chattanooga they can tell you much more than I'm capable of doing."
"God damn! I can't believe it! Noah! Dead! Do you know if they returned his body to Hawthorne to be buried?"
"Yes, they had his funeral there. Steve and Wade wanted to rush back to attend it, but his mother insisted that Noah would be buried by the time they drove back to Hawthorne."
"I feel like a fool...so careless. My own brother and I didn't even go to his funeral."
"Apparently no one knew how to contact you."
"I've been farting around; driving here and there to nowhere; feeling sorry for myself and about my girlfriend and the abortion she insisted on having. That's what broke us up."
"Your girlfriend was pregnant?"
"Only a couple of months. She and I left Hawthorne to get married, have the baby, and live out our lives together."
"Then, I take that you and Steve were never...?"
"Hell no! I only found out a couple of weeks ago that Steve was queer. We'd been best friends all our lives...and then...FUCK! Why does everything bad happen all at once?"
"Before you walked into Denny's, I was asking myself that same question."
"God, Jeff, I'm sorry that I added to your problems...I mean your friend dyin' and all."
"I could be curt and say it's all in a day's work for me. I've grown rather used to it, but it still hurts."
"I...I don't know what to do, Jeff. I don't know whether to go back to Hawthorne...hell, Noah's dead...Steve has moved. Carolyn, my girlfriend doesn't want to see me anymore, so I've really got no reason to go back."
"Where were you headed when you stopped in Briarwood this morning."
"North...just north...then west maybe. Hell, I don't know where I'm headed. I've got nowhere special to go. Suddenly I feel like I'm all alone in the world. I just don't know what the fuck to do!"
"Why don't you start by eating before your food gets colder than it already is?"
"I...I'm not very hungry right now."
"Look, Hal, it's late and I know you need to rest. I told you about some motels out on the highway, but I think I'd rather you spend the night at my dad's house. That's where I'm staying until my friend's funeral. Get a good night's sleep and let's you and me have a long talk tomorrow and maybe you can decide where you want to go or what you want to do..."
"Can I be blunt?"
"Sure, I always have been."
"You...this...uh...you're not inviting me to your dad's house for some other reason, are you?"
Jeff laughed out loud. "Heavens no! I told you, I'm married with two kids. I'm a priest and very faithful to my family and church. My dad has this big house with six bedrooms...three or four are never used. You can have your choice. Each of them has a private bath and a lock on the door if that makes you feel better."
"Look, Jeff, I'm sorry! I didn't mean...you know...Shit! I feel like a bigger fool having said that to you."
"Listen, Hal, I've been listening to confessions for years and I sure as hell know how straight guys feel when they think someone's hitting on them."
"You're very understanding, Jeff...and very nice."
"You know what I think?"
"What?"
"I think your food is ruined. Follow me in your car to my dad's house and I'll fix you a nice HOT breakfast!"
"Well, if you're sure..."
"Of course I'm sure! I'm ALWAYS sure! You ought to hear how sure my Johnny says I am...Come on!"
Hal and Jeff scooted out of the booth and Hal left a twenty-dollar bill on the counter for the waitress and his check, then he went outside to his car and followed Jeff to Walter's house.
Arriving there, Jeff cooked Hal an omelet, toast, bacon, and coffee. Hal ate every bite. Following the breakfast meal, Jeff took Hal to one of the unused bedrooms on the second floor. Hal was immediately impressed by the luxury of the room. He'd never seen anything like it in Hawthorne. There was a king-size bed and various pieces of furniture in the large room consisting of a couch with panel TV and cable, a recliner, a desk with a computer, a dresser and bureau made of cherry wood, a millionaire's dream.
Hal thought, 'And this is only a spare bedroom? Jesus! What must the others look like?'
Jeff showed him the private bathroom, complete with a Jacuzzi, a telephone, and something by the toilet that Jeff called a "bidet" which amused Hal when he learned it was a way to wash your butt without using toilet paper. God! Rich people thought of everything! Jeff opened a closet in the bathroom where Hal found an assortment of toiletries, shaving cream, face lotions, scented soaps, towels of assorted sizes, washcloths, and even new Mach-3 razors. Hal couldn't believe his eyes.
Before leaving Hal to bathe and go to bed, Jeff told him that his room was next door and if he needed anything not to hesitate to ask. Then Jeff left, leaving the Hawthorne stud in Wonderland. The first thing Hal did was to look at the lock on the bedroom door and toyed with the idea of locking it or leaving as it was. He was still a bit skeptical about Jeff's hospitality. But he opted to trust Jeff and left the bolt unlatched.
He undressed and went into the bathroom and soaked in a tub of bubble bath. He couldn't help but feel guilty. He was enjoying himself, but his pleasure was overshadowed from the news about Noah. He was alone in a strange house, in a strange town, in a room next to a homosexual priest and soon his happiness sank into deep depression. He got into bed, not bothering to put on shorts, as he had always slept in the nude.
Lying in bed while looking at the ceiling, Hal tried to remember when was the last time he'd cried. He couldn't remember...but somehow he felt he HAD to cry over his brother's death. He loved Noah and if Noah's spirit was watching, he needed to show Noah outwardly what he was feeling inside. So, Hal began to cry softly and a deep-felt emotion grew inside him and soon he was weeping loudly. This was not an act; Hal's sadness was sincere.
He saw a box of tissues on the dresser and walked across the room to retrieve it. As he was about to re-enter the bed, he dropped to his knees, hiding his face on the side of the mattress and began to cry even harder. He was totally unaware that Jeff had heard him and had come from the room next door and was watching Hal by cracking Hal's door.
Jeff felt compelled to go to Hal, not as a priest, but as a friend, something that Hal was in dire need of at the moment.
"Hal?" Jeff called quietly.
Hal raised his tear-drenched face to look at Jeff. "Yeah?"
"Are you all right?"
"Uh huh..."
"Can I help you in any way?"
"Yes, Jeff, I believe you can..."
"What do you want me to do?"
"Jeff, teach me to pray..."
"What?"
"Teach me to pray...I don't know how."
Jeff walked to the bed and knelt next to Hal's naked body. Hal made no movement to hide his nakedness. He wasn't ashamed or afraid of Jeff right now. Jeff put his arm around Hal's shoulder to comfort him.
"Hal?"
"Yes."
"Do you know the Lord's Prayer?"
"I think so...we used to say it every morning in school."
"Then, let's begin with the Lord's Prayer and then we'll go for something bigger."
"OK."
Quietly, the two guys began, "Our Father, who art in heaven..."
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Later that morning, Walter Clayton was dressed and walked down the hallway and noticed Jeff's door was closed but the bedroom next to Jeff's was slightly ajar. Walter opened the door slightly and saw Hal asleep, the covers had been thrown back and he was naked. This sight didn't alarm Walter because through the years, the bedrooms in his house had been used many times by strangers whom Jeff and/or Alex had invited home to sleep. Hell, that's how the Briarwood Boys fraternity began. At various times in the beginning, these rooms had bedded Ryan, Kyle, Troy, Jay, Ted, and countless others.
Other times when Jeff was a young teenager, Walter had been host to several homeless guys, which Jeff had invited home to eat and sleep. When he was a boy, Jeff knew no bad people and made it his cause to help anyone and everyone he could. Jeff knew no difference between a millionaire and an alcoholic bum passed out on a curb somewhere. People were people and all God's children. Walter was certain that he would meet the new stranger and Jeff would have a legitimate reason for housing him for the night. That's what made Jeff, 'Jeff'. He hadn't changed at all, since becoming a man. Walter smiled and gently shut Hal's door.
Dave, Walter's lover had arisen early and had already made breakfast when Walter entered the kitchen.
"Good morning, lover," Walter said to Dave.
"Morning, love," Dave replied, crossing the kitchen to give Walter a morning kiss.
"Did you notice we have a guest in the green bedroom?" Walter asked.
"No, I didn't."
"Well, we do. I didn't recognize him, but I'm sure he's in there because Jeff put him in there."
"Still the same Jeff, huh?"
"Yes. He'll never change and I wouldn't want him to."
"You or rather we, have great sons, Walter."
"Yes, and I'm proud of them, each in his own way. I never thought Jeff would grow up but he and Johnny have made a wonderful caring couple...especially since they've given us two new grandchildren."
"Ryan's funeral," Dave began a new topic. "Is it tomorrow?"
"Yes."
"I'll cancel my plans at the office and try to get there early."
"It's such a sad thing, Dave. Ryan, Kyle, Danny, and little Pete...all so happy together. It won't be the same. I guess I loved Ryan as much as I love Jeff and Alex. Ryan and Kyle both became sons to me. It's gonna be tough on Kyle and the boys, but all of us will help them all we can."
"Walt, do you think Kyle will still take the kids on their trip?"
"I hope so, Dave. The trip would be good for all three of them. Getting away is a good cure for grieving. I hope Kyle will find someone to accompany him. Looking after two young striplings in a foreign country can be a chore. I think Roger asked Troy and Jay if they would go with them, but Jay is such a homebody. He thinks Cliff and Roger's house would fall down if he left it for even a day much less an extended tour around the world...and God knows, Troy would never go off and leave Jay. Jeff and Johnny are busy in Mackintosh and now with the two kids...and I don't think Alex or Ted relish the idea of leaving the work they're doing. As for Billy...it's out of the question. He shouldn't leave Cliff and Roger so soon after his adoption. If there was just 'somebody'! Somebody who could go with them without any strings attached, romantically or otherwise..."
"Well, if they're meant to go...the good Lord will provide a chaperone!"
"I hope so."
"Morning Dad...Daddy Dave!" Jeff said coming into the kitchen.
"Good morning, son," Walter and Dave replied.
"I...uh hope you don't mind, but I brought someone home last night...or rather this morning. Someone who needed a bit of help."
"Just ONE?" Walter made a little joke. "I'm sure we have some extra rooms you could've filled."
"Dad, his name is Hal. He knows Steve and Wade. They're all from Hawthorne. Hal's brother was raped and murdered in Tennessee and he didn't know about it until I told him."
"YOU told him about his brother's murder? What kind of coincidence is that?"
"God works in strange ways, remember Dad?"
"So do you, if I remember correctly."
"I want him to stay a few days until he finds some kind of purpose or meaning in his life. He has no one in the world and really, nowhere to go."
"Is he a good person?"
"I think so, Dad."
"How old is he?"
"Early twenties..."
"The Briarwood Boys keep growing," Dave said. "We lost Ryan and here comes another...like 'when God closes a door, he opens a window."
"Son, pardon my asking, but this 'Hal'? Is he gay or straight?"
"Straight as I-95!"
"Do you think he likes kids?"
"I don't know. He practically raised his brother, Noah, all his life. Why?"
"One more question, son..."
"Okay."
"Do you think he might like to go to Europe?"
"What do you mean? OH, you're a sly one, Dad. You never change! Always trying to find an end to a means."
"Well...what do you think?"
"I don't know, Dad, let me pray about it..."
"Son, I know you're stressed to the limit, but I'm afraid I have some more sad news..."
"God, Dad! Is everything all right in Mackintosh?"
"Everything's fine there. This morning, Roger called me on my cell phone by my bed and last night he had a call from Chris in Bern, Switzerland."
"DR. ED?"
"I'm afraid so, son."
"Jesus Christ, Dad! When's it all gonna end?"
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(To be continued in "Briarwood"--PART EIGHT--chapter--eighty-three.)