All rights reserved. Copyright held by the author. If you are underage or are offended by gay fiction, containing graphic sex and explicit language, please exit now.
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"BRIARWOOD"
Copyright Ritchris, 2005
aka "Whence Cometh My Help"
Copyright Ritchris, 2002
Revised Version
A dramatic saga
by
Ritch Christopher
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BOOK FOUR
"FAR FROM THE CROWD"
Chapter Thirty-nine
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"Somewhere the years of my youth lie inside me.
growing old like mellow wine.
I shed no tears for my youth, none that blind me.
They're behind me now where those sad times
will never find me.
I have the loves of my life to remind me
that the whole wide world was mine.
I feel at peace with all that surrounds me,
And the joy of these autumn days still astounds
me.
Somewhere the years of my youth seemed so endless,
like a thousand dreams come true.
Meadows of summer green that I ran through,
And the boy who gave me his warm loving arms to
turn to.
How little time from our first sweet beginnings
to our lonely last goodbye.
But I have so many songs left unsung yet,
I'm young yet and my heart is the heart
of a young man,
A young man who doesn't want to die.
"The Years Of My Youth"
written by Hal Shaper
Copyright 1970 by
Productions Michel LeGrand
Paris, France
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Moving from Briarwood to Los Angeles for Alex and Ted was like the country boy seeing New York for the first time. There were so many people...all types...multinational...multisexual...all going at such a fast pace to God knows where, because surely they didn't know.
Alex was as frightened as Ted was excited when they got off the plane at LAX airport. Ted had been given the address of an apartment by the sports station, an apartment that he could use on a temporary basis until he could find one of his own. Alex had experienced riding in a New York cab when he had attended the opening of Rob's and Timmy's "Green Dolphin Street", but nowhere, no way, would the New York ride compare to the L.A. taxi.
First of all, the L.A. cab driver spoke absolutely no English, only Mexican-Spanish. Thank God the address was written on a piece of paper or they never would've arrived at their destination. What made it worse was that the ride involved getting on the L.A. freeway, which was like entering the jaws of Hell. Alex swore that no car was traveling slower than 100 mph. Everyone was switching lanes with no warning or signal whatsoever, moving in and out, in and out, plunging around each car ahead of the next. Jesus God! There must be some off-the-freeway streets where you could travel without risking your life at the hands of the crazy drivers talking away on their cell phones, completely oblivious to the traffic or the danger they were in...or the danger they were causing others. Life in L.A. was going to take its toll on the two boys! Just getting used to the pace of the enormous city would be nearly impossible.
There had been no send-off when Alex and Ted departed. That's the way Alex had wanted it. It had been painful to him, knowing he wouldn't be around his dad, David, and crazy lovable Jeff. Also, Alex had had one more difficult decision to make. 'Uncle' Roger had given him five million dollars to continue the clinic, plus five more in five years if he was still at the clinic, and this had concerned Alex. Jeff had been close to Roger and more so, to Cliff. Alex's relationship to, or ties with Roger and Cliff was always good, but not worth ten million dollars, he knew. Alex had talked with his dad and had told him he wanted whatever monies Roger had given him to go entirely to the clinic. Alex said he would find a job and in the meantime, he and Ted would live off Ted's salary in L.A.
Walter had been pleased and astonished at his son's unselfishness, but then, Alex had always been a good boy. Walter hoped Ted realized how fortunate he was to have Alex as a soul-mate.
When Walter relayed Alex's wishes about the money to Roger. Roger had other plans, as he felt Alex should be rewarded in some way for all the young men and women he had helped plus the lives Alex had saved at the Crisis Center. No, no matter how much Alex objected, Roger insisted on giving an endowment to Alex for a 'job well done'.
Roger instructed Walter to have a cashier's check made out to Alex for two million dollars. That would be enough to pay for his education, a house, a car, a trip, plus a little nest egg until he found his way in L.A. or wherever he and Ted decided to spend the rest of their lives. In addition, should Alex and Ted remain together for the obligatory five years as the rest of the Briarwood 'couples', Alex and Ted would receive an additional three million dollars.
Alex, of course, had put up a big fuss and refused the check, but no one, absolutely no one, could refuse Roger...ever! A funny idea occurred to Alex; his brother, Jeff, was following in Father Cliff's and Roger's footsteps and was going to be just like them. Jeff already was, insofar as no one could say 'no' to Jeff either. So, reluctantly, Alex took the gift. For some reason, even he couldn't explain, Alex didn't tell Ted about the money. He did feel guilty about not telling about this to the boy-guy-man-lover with whom he had chosen to spend the rest of his life. Maybe it was embarrassment...maybe he didn't want a huge lump sum in their bank account destroying Ted's goals and dreams. Money has ruined more relationships than poverty...gay or straight.
The temporary apartment in L.A. reminded Alex of the complex used in Showtime's "Maupin's 'Tales of the City'". There were two stories of apartments built around a quaint courtyard with a small swimming pool with chipped marcite. It had been a luxurious old house at one time...in old California when stars were stars and not flash-in-the-pan "one hit film" would-be actors. What was even more astonishing was that this was the apartment that the sports station had "given" Ted, considering that most of the residents were gay or lesbian. All it needed was handsome, naked Billy Campbell with Olympia Dukakis as its landlady.
Alex and Ted were confident of their love and relationship. They had long passed beyond any jealousies or worries about the other's fidelity. Maybe that's another reason Alex hadn't revealed the 'check' to Ted. He wanted Ted to want and love him for himself...not for any goddamned money, not that Ted would. But then, Ted had never been in the locker room interviewing a bunch of naked Rams, Dodgers, or Lakers before. The idea of this gave Alex a moment of minor anxiety, but it passed.
Alex couldn't decide what kind of job to look into. He COULD apply at one of the many crisis clinics in L.A. because L.A. had lots and lots of crises. That was for sure. However, Alex wasn't certain that he wanted to plunge into another stressful work environment... Maybe something fun this time, but what? His dad, Father Cliff, Roger, and especially Jeff had had a definite influence on Alex's wanting to help people...especially young gays who always seemed to be in need of something or other due to society, the right-wing Republicans, or anyone else who delighted in making their lives hell.
Ted was excited being on his own, or rather, he and Alex being on THEIR own...away from his mom and dad, away from Alex's dad and Alex's new stepfather...away from the suburban lifestyle of Briarwood with all the new family ties to religion which he had never understood nor ever expected to fathom. He was thrilled at his acceptance by the sports station. The salary was more than generous and easily enough for him and Alex to live on. But Alex was not the type to assume the role of newlywed househusband. Ted hoped that wherever Alex found work, he would be as satisfied as he was himself. It was important for him to make Alex as comfortable and happy as possible. After all, Alex had given up his job, his family, and practically his whole life to follow Ted to L.A., so that Ted could fulfill his dream.
The two of them could live together as a couple at long last. They could walk around nude whenever they were at home and make love if and when either of them felt the urge. When Alex began working at the Crisis Center in Briarwood, his and Ted's sex sessions dropped off enormously. Alex, working with guys and gals who had STD's, hepatitis, or who were HIV positive, had made him overly cautious. Even though neither he nor Ted catted about with other partners, the thought of contagion or infection made a huge impression in his mind every time the two of them slept together on the weekends. It became so serious that it was almost impossible for Alex to get an erection. Impotence at such a young age was actually becoming rampant. Whether it was fear or caution, the TV ads for Viagra and such said that almost 40% of the American males suffered from some kind of erectile dysfunction. Alex wondered how soon this problem would affect the population growth in the straight world.
Both of them seemed pleased with their temporary digs. They weren't in a hurry to find their own place until they were settled in their new jobs. Alex had access to his endowment but had told his dad to send him a monthly allowance from it. That way, Ted would think that Walter was supporting Alex until Alex got on his feet financially.
When Ted returned home from work on the second night, he and Alex decided to go into the courtyard and meet their neighbors who were having a barbecue around the pool. There were at least eight young men and six young ladies all laughing and cavorting, pouring beer, and splashing in and out of the pool. Every one of them had the expected California tan and streaks of sun bleach in their hair. God, they all looked beautiful. Four of the guys were couples while the other four were just roommates. Two of the six girls were a lesbian couple. The other four were straight, each pretty enough to easily get a job with Heidi Fleiss, should they want to. They all looked as if they were surfers, or at least beach bums and bunnies.
Alex and Ted donned shorts, wife-beaters, and thong sandals and prepared to meet their apartment mates. Sherman and Howie, Derek and Sammy, the two gay couples, greeted them happily, as did Buzz, Jimmy, Ty, and Gary. The lesbian couple was Dot and Maxine. The other girls were Connie, Lisa, Cheryl, and Lola. Everyone was friendly, and within fifteen minutes, Alex and Ted felt totally relaxed, felt that they had been accepted. Thirty minutes after that, Ted was helping Jimmy and Ty throw Buzz into the pool.
Alex sat in a lounge chair, sipping a mug of beer, and suddenly the group in front on him reminded him of home with Jeff, Jay, Troy, Kyle, and Ryan having a free-for-all in Roger's pool. He smiled and began to feel at home. People here were the same as they were two thousand miles away in Briarwood. Gary came over to sit by Alex while the others continued playing joust in the pool.
"What do you do?" Gary asked.
"Pardon?" Alex asked.
"I mean what kind of work do you do? And do you have a job?"
"I haven't decided yet."
"Are you into sports like your boyfriend?"
"No, not really. He's the brawn of our family." Alex said, smiling, looking at his lover having a good time in the pool.
"How long have the two of you been together, if you don't mind my asking?"
"Since we were babes in bassinets, but only as a couple for about two years."
"Wow! And you're still together?"
"Yep."
"Well, you two must've taken that phrase about 'not forgetting your first love' seriously." Gary said.
"I'd never thought about it, but I guess you're right."
"Do you mind if I ask if you're gay, Gary?" Alex asked.
"Yes...and no."
"You mean you're bi?"
"No, I'm gay, all right...or at least I used to be gay." He suddenly became quiet.
"A guy with your looks shouldn't have any trouble getting a boyfriend."
"I...uh....had one."
"Oh?"
"Yeah, but he died."
Alex felt a cringe. He knew the rest of Gary's conversation even before it was spoken.
"Yep," Gary continued. "He got the old high-five. The sad thing about it is...I don't know whether he got it from me or I got it from him."
"Are you full blown?" Alex asked with interest.
"Like a San Gay Pride parade."
"Are you on meds?"
"A ton of them. They seemed to work on me better than they did on Ken, my lover, who died."
"Shit! This was too much like being at home," Alex thought. The first person he'd met to converse with in California was like one of any number of clients he'd had at the Briarwood Crisis Center. He wondered if there was a sign around his neck advertising he had worked as a counselor. This fucking disease seemed to be his albatross. He was confronted by a victim wherever he went.
Alex's impulse was to get up and leave. He didn't feel like taking on his first 'client' in California just yet. He really didn't want to discuss AIDS, the Cole Institute, meds, or even broccoli. He needed a fresh start after all the pressure that had been on him overseeing the center. Why couldn't he be a happy under-achiever and pursue a career flipping burgers at Wendy's or popping corn at K-Mart, something where the only life-making decisions were if you wanted something rare or well done, small bagged popcorn or the large boxed? The idea of these work prospects produced an inward smile in Alex. If life could just be that simple...But it wasn't! No, he was the son of Walter Clayton and the brother of soon-to-be 'Father' Jeff Clayton and he had been taught to accept the realities of the world. People DO need people...and he, Alex, was one of those that people needed!
"How long you had it, Gary?" Alex asked, coming back from his self-concerned thoughts to the conversation with his new friend.
"I got tested around two years ago. That's when they found it. I don't know how long I'd had it before that. As soon as I came back positive, I felt it necessary that Ken be tested too. Hell, we weren't gadabouts. Both of us had been careful in choosing sex partners before we became a couple. So, the report on Ken came back positive...the same as mine. That's why neither of us knew which one of us had given it to the other."
"That's what I've heard from many couples." Alex remarked.
"The strange thing was that we both had it but we had different strains of the virus. My meds wouldn't work on him and vice-versa. Only his meds didn't work for him either!" Gary said, with a slight break in his voice. "Fuck, I don't know why I'm telling you all this. We met less than an hour ago. You just seem like the type who'll listen to what someone has to say."
Alex took a beat before telling Gary about the job he had just quit...about the center...Roger's Institute and hospital...the research project for a cure. Once Alex started talking, he couldn't seem to stop. The more he revealed, the more Gary's face seemed to glow with hope and interest in what Alex had to say.
It was a meaningless gesture, but sometime during Alex's monologue of revelation, they held hands without knowing which of them had taken the other's hand. It just sorta 'happened'. An unspoken bond was formed between them almost instantly. The desire to help the needy and the need to be needed converged into one outreach.
From the pool, Ted noticed his lover holding Gary's hand, but it didn't bother him. He was confident of Alex's faithfulness, and over the past few years, he'd seen Alex holding many guys' hands. Alex was aware of Ted's trust and appreciated it. That's what had made their love endure since puberty. Ted knew there would be many more that Alex would hold and comfort in the future. That was what made Alex, Alex...the same with Walter and Jeff. It just ran in the Clayton family.
When Ed finally left Chris' house, shortly before midnight, true to his promise, Chris gave Roger a ring.
"Hello?" Roger said.
"You...you told me to call you later...I don't know if you meant this much later. I hope you weren't asleep."
"Neither Cliff nor I ever go to bed before 2;00 AM. As I matter of fact, I was a bit worried that you might not call. So how was your evening with our fine administrator?"
"Actually, it was quite enjoyable."
"How was dinner and did the two of you find something to talk about besides work?"
"We had a lovely meal at my favorite French restaurant. Since Ed has spent so much time in Paris, I thought he might like to refresh his taste buds with some nice French cuisine."
"That was a very admirable choice, Chris."
"We did discuss work, some, but the conversation somehow shifted to the topic of music and I learned that he like Mahler symphonies, just as I."
"Then you did find out that you two had some common outside interests?"
"Yes, you and Cliff will be happy to know he's a huge Broadway musical buff and he's seen, 'Green Dolphin Street' three times."
"You've got to be kidding! I'm sure you told him all about Rob and Timmy?"
"He didn't know about yours and Cliff's relation with them, and he was amazed. He's a big fan of Rob's."
"If Rob and Timmy can make it down to Briarwood for Christmas, Ed will simply have to meet them."
"I'm sure he'd love it."
"I hope you became good friends, Chris."
"We did. Ed came back to the manse with me for brandy and we cranked up those Bose speakers you bought to a very high decibel level which really shows off Mahler."
"Chris, what you just told me is music to my ears. I've been worried about Ed...worried that he puts too much time in at the hospital and needs some kind of social relief. I won't deny that Cliff has said the same thing about you."
"Work is one thing I never complain about."
"But you should. You're young. You have to kick up your heels sometimes or go running down Main Street stark naked."
"I...I see you've read Kerouac too."
"I used to worship him! I took off 'on the road' once, just as Jack did. Only I didn't wind up in San Francisco. I wound up in Nepal."
"So, do you think it's all right to be Ed's dinner date this weekend at our house?"
"I won't lie. I told him you'd call him in the morning with an invitation,"
"And..."
"We'll both accept. As a matter of fact, he's picking me up and we're driving there together."
"I can't wait to tell Cliff. He's going to be as pleased as I."
"Roger...?"
"Yes?"
"You DO remember that he's straight, don't you?"
"In all my years of traveling and meeting people, I've never met a totally straight man."
"Meaning?"
"Cliff could explain this to you better than I, but then, you're a priest too and should know that God just didn't make male and female bodies. He gave them souls...and souls can be attracted to other souls no matter what gender they belong to."
"I know what you're talking about...and once again, you're correct. I'll be honest in saying I felt that Ed's and my souls were attracted to the other's."
Chris, with all his heart, wanted to tell Roger about Ed's kiss, but he bit his tongue and kept the secret to himself for fear Roger and Cliff might try to encourage a relationship whether or not it was meant to be.
"So, then? Cliff will see you at Morning Prayer?"
"Neither snow nor rain nor gloom of night shall stay this courier from the swift completion of my appointed rounds," Chris recited.
"Good night, Chris and thanks for calling."
"Good night, Roger. You can tell Cliff whatever you want about my evening with Ed. Make up something and give Cliff a thrill."
"I think I will!"
Roger hung up the phone. He turned and saw an anxious stare from Cliff.
"WELL...?" Cliff said. "How did it go?"
Cliff no sooner got the words out of his mouth before Jay and Troy appeared in the den.
"Yes, Roger?" Jay said. "How did Chris' date turn out with Ed?"
"You mean you two stayed up to find out how their evening went?" Roger asked, amused at Jay and Troy.
"Yes, dammit! And don't try pulling our legs by saying nothing happened."
"Well, I could lie and say they went to bed together at the manse OR I could tell you that the two of them had a nice dinner at a French restaurant and spent the rest of the evening listening to a Mahler symphony."
"I think I'd rather hear you lie to us!" Jay said.
"Jay, Jay, Jay, I told you that Ed has no interest in Chris other than on a friendly or professional basis. He has no interest in any other men that I know of. ED is straight, Jay."
"Sure...Rock Hudson and Cary Grant looked straight too...at least eight inches of each was straight!"
"You get more incorrigible as the days go by." Roger said, joking.
"But they DID have a good time together?" Jay asked.
"Yes, so much so, that Ed is going to pick Chris up this weekend and they're coming here to dinner together."
"HALLELUJAH!" screamed Jay, "to quote Parson Brindley!"
"You loveable idiot!"
"Why, my, my, I DO believe we're gonna have two gentlemen callers, come Friday night!" Jay said, mimicking a Southern belle.
"Can it, Laura, and go play with your menagerie!" Troy said to Jay.
"You know where my menagerie is, lover." Jay replied back. "but your balls aren't glass. They're CRYSTAL!"
Troy took a loving swat at Jay's butt.
"Stop that!" Jay squealed. "You know I don't like being hit unless I'm wearing leather.
"Then why don't you go into the bedroom and put on a saddle and I'll ride you all night!" Troy retorted.
"Thanks, Roy, I'll DO just that." Jay announced, going down the hall singing, "Happy trails to you..."
Cliff stood there laughing at Jay.
"He's good for you," Cliff said to Troy.
"I know...and I love him." Troy said, love shining in his eyes.
"You guys are so great together."
"We owe our happiness to you and Roger."
"Not really. I think it was God's plan that led you to each other."
"Probably." Troy said, smiling and then leaving.
"Rog?"
"Yes?"
"Were you being truthful just now?"
"About what?"
"Chris and Ed?"
"Yes."
"Nothing happened?"
"Not really."
"'Not really? But you do get the impression that Chris likes Ed a lot?""
"Maybe."
"Then I'll go say a prayer and see if God can plan something for the two of them."
"You're almost as bad as your other half, me!"
"What about Ed? Do you think there's a possibility that..."
"All I can say is Chris is working on that matter."
"Then perhaps we can give him a little help," Cliff replied wryly.
"Cliff, if it's meant to be...it WILL be."
"Too bad you're not in line to be the next Dalai Lama. You'd make a good one, you know?"
"I've had my head shaved twice in my life, but never again. Come on, let's you and me go to bed and see if we can remember what we used to do."
"I have a vague recollection..."
"Then hold onto it until we get to the bedroom!"
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Chris turned out the lights, went into his bedroom and undressed. He crawled into bed nude and lay there thinking about the evening... dinner, Ed, the music and the moment on the couch. They had kissed. Ed had not tried to pull back and he showed no shame when they had separated. Neither of them wanted it to go any farther than the one kiss. It was too soon and there was too much at risk for both of them.
Chris rolled over and hugged the adjoining pillow. He lay there imagining....what if Ed HAD spent the night? Then a whole string of emotions followed the thought, ranging from contentment to fear. Would he ever fall in love? Would he ever find someone in his life like Roger and Cliff were to each other? Probably not. But...could Ed find a place in his life for him? Suddenly Chris king-sized bed seemed twice the size and twice as lonely...still, Ed had kissed him on their first date...
Timmy nervously measured the coffee into the coffeemaker, continuously glancing at the door. Rob had been gone longer than Timmy had expected. He didn't relish the idea of telling Dorothy all by himself about Gene's murder. He wished Rob were here to help him. After all, what if Dorothy had a heart condition or worse? Who knows how the details of Gene's death would affect her?
This had been the longest day for him, what with two shows, a torrential rain to combat on the way home, the traffic the cab met was horrendous...and then all the hoopla of the police, detectives, paramedics, and the quick glance he got of Gene's mutilated body had drained all his strength and emotional fortitude. He planned on sleeping all day today until show time. He longed to snuggle in Rob's arms and feel safe again.
Dorothy's eyes wandered about Timmy's living room. There were autographed pictures on the walls, pictures signed by every known name in the Broadway world. On the baby grand piano sat two shiny Tony Awards and a Grammy. Over the plush velvet couch was a framed show card of "Green Dolphin Street" with Rob's name above the title. On both sides of the piano's music stand were stacks of Broadway scores and music manuscript paper containing tunes that Timmy and Rob had written, hopefully for a new Broadway show next season, after their current contracts expired. On the far wall were rows of CD's of every B'way show available, plus many collectors' items. Beneath them was a rather large collection of their favorite DVD movies. Needless to say, Dorothy was rather impressed by the decor. Timmy and Rob had made it big in such a short amount of time.
Dorothy reached inside her purse to touch the shiny object she was concealing and it put a wry smile on her face. "Too bad their music will never be heard," she thought..."at least, not performed by the composers."
"Dorothy" was not her real name. It was Agnes...Agnes Brimley. She HAD no brother...OR sister. She had been raised in a rather strict religious environment. Her father had been a Pentecostal minister, her mother, the church organist. Agnes had never been allowed to wear lipstick or fingernail polish, to cut her hair, or exhibit her body in tight-fitting clothing. These all represented sins of the flesh, according to her father. At the age of eighteen, she'd never had a boyfriend...or a date. She had never been to a dance, a prom, or a movie. The TV at her house was only allowed to be tuned to religions services and they had to be scrutinized for their beliefs. Catholic masses on TV were taboo. The Catholics were all going to hell with the Jews and all other Christians who didn't believe in the ONE true God.
When Agnes was nineteen, her father died from a coronary, which he had had during a Holy Ghost baptism. The girl he was attempting to submerge almost drowned when he let go of her body suddenly and fell on top of her. The baptismal was four feet deep and there must have been several inches of water missing which the girl had swallowed before the choir director made a lunge in the water to save his pastor who had sunk to the bottom...on top of the girl. Agnes' mother had told her that her father had died the way that God had chosen for him...doing the Lord's work. The mother actually seemed pleased about it.
Agnes didn't think about God's intervention when her mother was killed, hit by a garbage truck while trying to jay-walk on the streets of Crossville, Tennessee. As a matter of fact, her mother's death had a strange effect on Agnes and her outlook on the world. A year later, she was wearing heavy makeup with long false fingernails painted scarlet red to match her lips. She wore tight sweaters and skirts and went to movies and saw all the worldly things she had been denied while growing up.
One night in the bathtub she scrubbed herself so hard she learned about masturbation and had her first orgasm. The "joys of the flesh" were wonderful! They were God-given. She couldn't wait until she felt a man's "thing" inside her. She took a bus downtown to a beer bar and made herself "available" in case some gentleman was interested. She wore a sweater much too small for her, accenting her newly discovered bustline...high heels and black panty hose and enough perfume to gag a goose or kill a gnat.
At the far end of the long bar sat a sailor in his white suit. He had spent most of his pay and was looking for a cheap place to spend the night before taking a Trailways bus to Charleston, via Knoxville, Tennessee. His ship was leaving the next day for unknown ports and it might be a long time before he got another piece of pussy...American pussy, anyway. He spotted Agnes and immediately he saw a fast and easy mark. If he could pick her up, he would have a broad and a bed...or a broad IN a bed...either way, his problems would be solved.
Agnes was taken in by his boldness when he asked her to dance to the music of the jukebox. She'd never danced but she was ready to try anything and everything...just adding to all the things her father had warned her about that would cause her to lose her soul in the eternal lake of fire.
The sailor, whose name turned out to be Jake, had had a few two many mugs so the dancing was merely holding her close and taking a few baby steps in time with the music...a slow ballad. Agnes was beside herself in dreamland. Jake began to grind his crotch into hers and she thought she would faint when she felt his thing getting harder and larger through his trousers and her tight skirt. "My Lord." she thought, "they actually DO swell up and get hard! What in the world would make men's 'things' do that?"
By the end of the second song, Agnes had invited Jake to her home for coffee and homemade apple pie. Jake was still sober enough to know that his mission was accomplished with pillows, pie, and pussy!!
Although Agnes was curious about the sight of a naked man, she turned the light off as they began to undress for...well, whatever! Her heart stopped and she held her breath as the naked sailor eased into the bed next to her. She was really stunned when he kissed her...her very first kiss...and found it nauseating when he tried to pry her lips apart with his tongue. This was revolting and unclean but she played along with it for fear he would stop before she got what she wanted most...a man, actually inside her...her...vagina! She'd never heard anyone say that word before. That, too, was a sin. Well, she didn't really say it out loud...but she thought it.
Jake let his hands roam until he had cupped each of her breasts and was flicking her nipples with his thumbs simultaneously. Good heavens! Her nipples were hard as two thimbles and she felt moisture between her legs. Was she peeing? Surely not...she didn't even have the urge to pee, but some liquid seemed to be oozing out of her...her...vagina! What if HE found out about it? The very thought of his finding out that she was peeing or whatever embarrassed her...in the dark. Thank the Lord the lights were out and he couldn't see her blushing.
Slowly, he edged his body on top of hers. His weight almost smothered her and she thought she couldn't breathe...and then...she felt 'it'. My God! How big did it get? It felt enormous! Why, it had grown to nearly five inches...or maybe six. Her "vagina" was not large or deep enough to put all that manhood inside her! But Jake was attempting to, just the same.
Agnes screamed when he put the tip of it in her. Her whole body was trembling...at least as much as she COULD tremble with all his weight on top of her. And then, it happened! With one huge thrust, he rammed all of him into her opening and she thought he had ripped her apart. She tried her best to push him off but it was too late. Jake was lunging deeper and deeper and she felt trapped, besides being in the most horrifying pain she'd ever known.
"Get off!!" Agnes cried out. "Get off, you monster!! You're...you're raping me and I don't like it one bit!!"
Jake apparently had been horny for some time because on his seventh or eighth thrust he spilled a sea of sperm inside her and she felt his "thing" go limp and became smaller and seemed to pop out of her. That's when she felt the strength to throw him off her and he landed in the floor beside the bed. Agnes jumped out of bed and ran for her bathrobe and then hurried to gather his clothes from the floor and throw them at him.
"Get out!!" she screamed. "Get out before I kill you or something worse!"
Poor old puzzled Jake grabbed his clothes and ran out the door stark naked. He dressed behind a bush about a block down the darkened street. Agnes, meanwhile, ran to the bathroom to draw a tub of hot water to get the smell of this...this MAN off her and out of her. She bathed for over an hour.
Nine months later, Clarence was born, the son of Agnes and some dark angel God had sent to her one night. Yes, Agnes was the second Immaculate Conception. She moved to Roanoke, Virginia, where she joined the Church of God and brought her son up in a godly way...no movies, no tight jeans, no sports, no TV, and definitely, NO girls or even pictures of girls. Clarence was sent to her by God and he would be raised holy.
Until his eighteenth birthday, Clarence had been shielded from his peers, but he knew he was gay. He'd never had a boy, but at night when he was sure his mother was asleep, he masturbated while thinking of every good-looking boy in school. He had been doing this since he was fourteen.
A few nights later, after his eighteenth homemade birthday cake, Clarence was walking downtown and passed Roanoke's Municipal Auditorium where a Broadway touring company of "Into the Woods" was playing. Clarence had never seen a show, live or on film, but he wanted to experience a few things in life that his church taught against. He slowly walked around the corner to the stage entrance. There was a boy standing outside the door lighting a cigarette. He was dressed rather funny in bright blue overalls and an orange and white striped shirt...and yellow shoes. The boy looked up and saw Clarence.
"Hey, you got a light?" the boy asked.
"What?" Clarence asked back.
"A light...you know...light?...Cigarette?...Burn?...Smoke?"
"Oh...oh, no. I don't have one. I don't smoke." Clarence replied to this strangely dressed, very attractive, almost handsome creature.
"Well, I DO! Only I can't! I have a cigarette but my goddamned lighter went dry!"
Clarence's face turned red. He'd never heard anyone use the Lord's name in vain. He didn't know if he was embarrassed or offended.
"You seen the show?" the boy asked.
"What?...Oh, no. I haven't seen the show."
"You oughta! It's great. I'm 'Jack'...or at least I play 'Jack'. My real name is Brad. Brad Cruise! Oh, not really, that's my stage name. I don't tell anyone my REAL name."
"You're not really Brad, but you are Brad, and you play someone called 'Jack'. Right?"
"Now you got it! It's a bit confusing if you're not in show business. You aren't, are you?"
"No." Clarence replied, resolutely.
"Well, you oughta be. You're good looking enough."
Brad's reply embarrassed Clarence who had never thought about his looks.
"Thanks, I guess."
"You seemed surprised that I said that."
"It's just that I never heard a guy tell another guy that he was good-looking before."
"Oh, we say all kinds of things like that in the 'biz'," Brad remarked. 'But, anyway, you are."
"I'm what?"
"Good looking, asshole."
Being called a name really offended Clarence. He didn't know how to react or what to say in his defense.
"Did I say something wrong?" Brad continued, seeing the look on Clarence's face.
"I..uh, didn't like what you called me."
"I didn't mean anything by it. It's just something I call someone who doesn't seem to understand what I'm talking about,"
"You call everyone an...an asshole and no one gets mad?"
"Boy, I can tell you've lived in the sticks all your life. You never been to the big city?"
"Which one."
"The ONLY big city...New York!!!"
"No, I haven't...asshole." Clarence couldn't believe he had just said a dirty word...and used it to call a complete stranger. He looked surprised and embarrassed at himself before breaking out in laughter.
Brad caught on quickly what had just happened and he joined Clarence in his laughing. They both laughed to the point of hysteria, actually leaning on one another's shoulder. When their mirth subsided, they withdrew from the semi-embrace and their eyes locked into a "knowing" gaze. They had something in common... something unspoken, but understood by each of them.
Clarence's face flushed once again. He suddenly thought he was about to kiss Brad and it nearly scared the life out of him. This feeling, this unknown sensation, had almost gotten the best of him. Whatever he had felt, Brad felt it, too.
"Look, I'm sorry for being so rude," Brad said. "It's just that...OK I want to make it up to you."
"What?"
"I get house seats if I want them and I'd love to give you my house seats for you to bring someone with you...anyone...girlfriend, boyfriend, mother...anyone, to come see me in the play. How about it?"
"Well, I don't know."
"You said you've never seen it! Now you can...and for free!"
This was the most exciting thing that had ever happened to Clarence in his entire life. He was so smitten by this boy...about his same age. He would have walked through hot coals if Brad had asked. Why, he would even defy his mother and sneak off and see a real play with live people performing on a stage.
"How about tomorrow night?"
Clarence thought a moment how he would be able to deceive Agnes, but soon broke out in a big smile and said, "Sure! Sure, I'll come."
"What's your name? I'll leave two tickets for you at the box office."
"It's Clarence. Clarence Brimley!...And I'll only need one ticket."
"You don't want to bring someone with you?"
"No."
"Great! Then maybe, if you're willing, you and I can go out and get a bite to eat after the show."
"Er...OK."
"Whoops! I gotta go. They're starting the overture. See 'ya tomorrow night!"
"Yeah...tomorrow night!" Clarence said, as he floated home.
Clarence had never lied to his mother, but maybe this once, the Lord would forgive him. Who knows? Maybe he could win Brad's soul over to the Lord. He told his mom he was going to a prayer group at church and he wanted to walk home to save money, so he might be late.
Agnes had no reason to suspect anything or to doubt her son's veracity, but she knew that if Clarence was going to a Church of God pray-in, it would be well chaperoned. Little did she know that this was the night of the beginning of something that would change her life forever.
Brad had reserved the best seat in the house for Clarence... sixth row, aisle seat. The theatre was filled with "sinners"...the kind of people that Clarence had never associated with. They were pretty people, especially the women, in spite of their all being harlots wearing makeup with short bobbed hairdos and a mixture of aromatic perfumes which made the auditorium remind him of a house of ill-repute, whatever that was, mentioned in the Bible. Before the show and later during intermission, both the men and the women lit up cigarettes like fiends.
The house lights finally dimmed and the orchestra began the overture. A chill and a thrill went throughout Clarence's entire body. The curtain rose up, and on the right side of the stage, was Brad in that same funny outfit, pretending to be milking a life-sized plastic cow which he later sold for a handful of beans. Brad sang a song with the woman playing his mother, arguing about the bean/cow bargain. Clarence's jaw dropped and he sat in the theatre in awe. If this was a sin, then it was the one sin he was glad he had committed. No church service in the world would or could compare with the splendor and spectacle that he was beholding.
In the second act, 'Jack's' mother was killed by the giant and Jack sat in a fake tree-top, singing with the actor playing the baker. Cinderella, and Little Red Riding Hood were on the opposite side of the stage and the four of them sang. 'No One Is Alone'. Somewhere in the middle of the first chorus, Clarence started crying. He had never been so moved emotionally by the beauty of a melody and the message of its lyrics. Clarence locked his eyes on Brad and instantly fell in love.
The next week, the show left Roanoke for Indianapolis with an additional person. Brad had talked with the company manager who was more than just a close friend and had gotten Clarence a job as an assistant to the assistant stage manager. Clarence left Roanoke and Agnes in the dead of night...never to return to either. He had found a new life and a new lifestyle...with Brad.
Six months later, Agnes learned that the boy...the 'QUEER' that had seduced her son into a life of sin and damnation had died from the queer disease and Clarence had left him at the hospital to return to his and Brad's New York apartment and committed suicide the same evening so that they could spend their eternity together no matter whether it was in heaven or in hell.
Agnes went to New York to claim her son's body. At the Manhattan City Morgue, a young man escorted her to the refrigeration room for her to see her son once again. This guy who pulled opened the drawer to withdraw Clarence, was obviously a queer by his feminine demeanor and affected lisp. He had overseen the autopsy and he had touched Agnes' little beloved's naked body. This guy's name was on his nameplate. "Stanley Stevens". This was a name that Agnes wrote on the back of her plane ticket envelope. She wanted to come see him again. He was the first real homosexual she'd ever met, but it wouldn't be the last.
A month after Clarence's funeral, a very angered, saddened, and newly sociopathic Agnes had returned to New York where she had stalked Stan Stevens, only to learn he had a friend, Gene Cyphers. Agnes had spent a week fasting and praying before she got her sign from God to eradicate the world of homosexuals, one by one, no matter how long it took.!
She took a room in a cheap hotel on West 49th Street and spent a week formulating her plan of action. The first person she struck down had been Stan a month ago...then Gene tonight. But, while plotting Gene's demise, she followed him home one night in a taxi and noticed him talking to his next door neighbors in his apartment building...two Broadway celebrities who appeared to be very gay to her. She figured once she had succeeded in eliminating Gene and his roommate, she might as well go next door and expunge the blight of homosexuality in the whole brownstone.
She watched for the police to leave and noticed that one of the two neighbors was still inside his apartment. That's when she decided to pay "Timmy" a late night call. She was surprised to see how handsome he was and not at all effeminate, as fags were supposed to be. He was mannerly and invited her in for coffee, attempting to ease the loss of her "nephew", Gene. While Timmy was in the kitchen, she knew she must hurry if she were going to eliminate him and maybe wait for his roommate. Why, she could kill three queers in one night...maybe four, if she got a 'go' at David.
Timmy looked under the kitchen counter for a serving tray which he set up formally with two china coffee cups with matching sugar and cream containers, white tiny cloth napkins, spoons, and a plate of pastries Rob had bought earlier yesterday for breakfast. Timmy wanted everything comfortable and pleasant for Dorothy when he broke the bad news to her .
In the corner of the living room adjacent to the swinging door to the kitchen stood a three-foot high replica of Michelangelo's 'David'. Dorothy spied it and wondered if she could lift it and use it as a weapon to hit Timmy with as he entered from the kitchen. It was plaster of Paris and much lighter than she expected but still heavy enough for the job she intended. She would hold it almost as high as her head and press her back against the wall that would hide her enough to ambush her victim with an element of surprise. Then she could retrieve her shiny sharp object from her purse and finish her planned deed. Just as she leaned over to lift the statue, Timmy swung open the door with his foot, carrying the tray, and at the same time, the front door of the apartment opened as Rob entered.
"Hey, babe!" Timmy and Rob said to one another, simultaneously.
The kitchen door had swung open almost far enough to hit Dorothy in the butt. Luckily, for her sake, she had not picked up "David" yet. She stood abruptly and faced the two of them. Her face was flushed.
"Oh, hello...", Dorothy said, sweetly to Rob.
"Hello?..."Rob replied.
"Rob, this is Dorothy Cyphers, Gene's aunt."
"Hello, Miss Cyphers. I'm sorry about your loss", Rob added.
"My loss?" Dorothy exclaimed with a pseudo-surprised expression.
"IX-nay." Timmy whispered to Rob, "I haven't told her yet. She doesn't know about Gene."
Then Rob's face turned red, as did Timmy's.
"My loss?....What do you mean?" Dorothy continued her 'act'.
"Has something happened to my Gene?"
"Dorothy, you'd better have a seat. I'm afraid we have some very bad news for you."
Dorothy grabbed her heart and slowly made her way back to the large easy chair, playing her role to the hilt.
Slowly, Rob began telling her of his and Timmy's discovery when they had arrived home. Dorothy gasped before breaking into a wail and spouting forth buckets of tears over her "loss". Rob and Timmy were overcome by her grief and they cried, too. Timmy was relieved that Rob had been there to do the "dirty work". At least he had been spared that. What Timmy didn't know was that Rob had probably saved his life by coming home at the exact moment he had.
When all the tears, phony and real, had subsided, Dorothy composing herself would have rivaled Bette Davis for the Oscar race. Rob and Timmy looked both aghast and impressed at the way she had handled the news. Timmy tried to change the subject to ease the tension.
"Rob, how's David doing...and where is he? I thought he was coming back with you."
"He...uh...found a place to stay." Rob replied.
"Oh? Where?"
"With that new guy he met...John."
"What new guy?...John who?" Timmy pressed on.
"You KNOW...JOHN...the NEW guy!!" Rob emphasized by winking privately to Timmy. There was no need for anyone to know that David had gone home with one of the investigators on the case.
Timmy finally caught on. "You mean, John, the..."
"Yes, THAT John," Rob interjected before Timmy could say "detective".
"You mean he's..."
"Yep!" Rob replied with a broad smile.
"...and he and David are going to...?" Timmy continued.
"I suppose."
"Damn!" Timmy said in surprised exasperation before returning his attention to the bereaved "aunt".
"Dorothy, is there someone you'd like us to call? Is there some place here in the city you can stay rather than returning to Yonkers? You must be tired and exhausted." Rob said.
"No, no, boys, I'm fine." Dorothy said, wiping her eyes once again. "There is no one to call and it seems such a waste to check into a hotel at this time of the morning. I may as well drive back to Yonkers and return tomorrow to arrange for Gene's funeral"
"No, Dorothy!" Timmy spoke up. "We won't let you do that! Gene was our neighbor and friend. Out of respect for him, the least Rob and I can do is put you up for the rest of the night, or morning as the case may be. That couch over there makes up into a nice double bed. You can stay with us and sleep late, as Rob and I plan to do. Then, we can make a big breakfast and we'll do all we can to help you with the plans for Gene."
"That is so kind of you...but I really don't want to be a burden on you. You boys have had a hard night, too." Dorothy said with the best sincerity she could muster.
"You're no burden. That's the least we can do," Rob offered.
"Well, if you insist," she said, dropping her eyes.
"We DO insist. Timmy and I will be right here in the bedroom and we'll leave the door unlocked in case you need us."
This phrase perked up Dorothy's interest, but she didn't show it. They would BOTH be asleep in the room next to her...with the door unlocked.
"OK..if you're sure!"
"Then it's settled!" Rob said. "Let me show you where the bathroom is and get you some towels and a spare toothbrush. If you like, I'll loan you one of my shirts to sleep in."
"Oh, you boys are so kind. I can't thank you enough."
"You don't have to."
The three of them finished their decaf coffee and Rob and Timmy retired to their room while Dorothy lay in the sofa bed thinking....and smiling.
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(To be continued in "Briarwood"--BOOK THREE--chapter-forty.)