Briarwood

All rights reserved. Copyright held by the author. If you are underage or are offended by gay fiction, containing graphic sex and explicit language, please exit now.

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"BRIARWOOD"

Copyright Ritchris, 2006

A dramatic saga

by

Ritch Christopher

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BOOK TEN

"CHRIS AND BEYOND..."

"Take me to the world that's real.

Show me how it's done.

Teach me how to laugh, to feel.

Move me to the sun.

Just hold my hand

Whenever we arrive.

Take me to the world

Where I can be alive!

Let me see the world that smiles,

Take me to the world.

Somewhere I can walk for miles

Take me to the world.

With all around

Things growing in the ground,

Where birds that make a sound are birds.

We shall see the world come true.

We shall have the world.

I won't be afraid with you.

We shall have the world.

I'll hold your hand

And know I'm not alone.

We shall have the world to keep,

Such a lovely world we'll weep.

We shall have the world forever for our own."

"TAKE ME TO THE WORLD"

from "EVENING PRIMROSE"

music and lyrics by Stephen Sondheim

copyright 1966

Chapter 106

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The Saturday night after Chris' heroic actions at the auto accident was mostly uneventful when Chris spent the night with Billy...to Billy's dismay. It was Chris whom had laid down the ground rules concerning no jerking off between the two of them. Several times during the evening when Billy tried to guide the conversation about sexual matters, Chris would give him a stern, 'you promised' look and would change the subject. Billy had a fourteen inch black and white television in his bedroom and they sat in bed until the late movie, 'Rollerball', starring James Caan, was over. Before lying down to go to sleep, Chris got out of bed and went to Billy's bureau which had a ten inch crucifix hanging on the wall above the chest. Chris crossed himself and said two prayers, one to St. Nicholas, the patron saint of children and a second to St. Francis, the patron saint of animals. These were Chris' favorite two saints to whom he had prayed nightly since he was a small boy, big enough to pray by himself. He ended his devotional and climbed into the bed next to Billy, Chris was in his pajamas while Billy opted to sleep in his tighty-whities and t-shirt. Before turning his back to Billy, Chris gave Billy a small kiss on his right cheek.

"Good night, best friend," Chris said.

"'Night, my hero..." Billy replied.

Neither boy got much sleep that night as Chris was afraid to go into a deep sleep and perhaps be fondled by his best friend. Billy didn't sleep because he waited long into the night and early morning hours for Chris to FALL asleep. Billy kept saying to himself, 'If I could only touch Chris...If I could just get him excited enough...If Chris were just willing to TRY something new...ANYTHING!'.

Needless to say, Chris and Billy had a difficult time staying awake during mass the next day. Their weariness was noticed by Katherine. Since it was Chris' first sleepover ever, she hoped that nothing bad had happened between her son and his best friend. She trusted both of them and had no concern about either of them drinking, smoking, or doing drugs. Any kind of sexual action between the two would never have occurred to Katherine for she knew how devout Chris was in the Catholic faith and the Church frowned on masturbation and pre-marital sex of any kind.

When the mass was over, Katherine told Chris to invite Billy over for Sunday lunch as a nice social reciprocation for Saturday night's sleepover. Chris replied to his mother that he was just too tired to have Billy or ANYONE over, He used the excuse that he had difficulty sleeping in a strange bed, not his own. Katherine accepted Chris' reasoning and dropped the idea of an invitation to Billy.

After a hearty meal of his mother's southern fried chicken, Chris went to his room and fell asleep almost instantly. He slept soundly for nearly four hours before being awakened by a larger than usual seminal emission. The sticky white fluid was all over his underwear and a huge spot on his sheets, blanket, and bedspread. Chris was astonished by the amount of semen he had excreted...worse yet, how in the world could he hide all this from his mother. He went into his bathroom and filled his water glass beside his toothbrush. Then he got a bar of soap from the bathtub, a washcloth, and bath towel. He did his best to clean up the mess but all he did was spread his body fluid into a larger area. Soon half his bottom sheet was covered in soap and water which had also soaked into the mattress.

Finally, Chris stripped all his bedclothes from the bed, filled the bathtub up and put everything in to soak. When Katherine came upstairs to get Chris to get ready for dinner, Chris was in an emotional quandary. He didn't want to lie to his mother, but at the same time, he was too embarrassed to tell her what actually happened.

"Chris? What happened to your bedclothes?" Katherine asked.

"I...I had an accident, Mother."

"What kind of accident?"

"I...I fell asleep so soundly, that I...my stomach was upset. I...I woke up and I had diarrhea and didn't make it to the toilet in time. I...I was too embarrassed for you to see the mess I'd made, so I tried to clean it up by washing my sheets, blanket, and bedspread in the bathtub." Chris hated that he had just lied to his mother...but better a lie than the truth when it came to explaining what he would later learn to call a 'wet dream'.

"Oh, honey. I'm sorry you had an upset stomach, but you've had them before and I didn't mind doing your laundry as I've done your whole life."

"I know, Mother, but...the mess was so large. I...I didn't want you to see it."

"Sweetheart, I'm more concerned about your being sick than a bunch of soiled bedclothes. Here! Let's see if the two of us can squeeze the excess water out of them and I'll take them down to the washing machine."

"Thanks, Mother."

"I don't wonder that your stomach is upset. You've had a very traumatic weekend at the doughnut shop and then yesterday with the auto accident. Chris, no wonder you were exhausted at church this morning. Honey, if you're not feeling better tomorrow morning, I'll write you a note and you can stay home all day to rest."

"I'm sure I'll be all right, Mother."

"Oh, Chris, I'm SO proud of you...and so is your dad."

"Aw, Mother, please don't start that gushing over me again. I told you and EVERYONE a dozen times that what I did wasn't all that special. I...I just happened to be there when two accidents occurred. ANYONE would have done the same as I."

"Oh, my little modest saint! I still thank God every night for sending you to your dad and me."

"Wanna know something, Mother?"

"What?"

"I do the same thing..."

"What do you mean?"

"I thank God every night for His letting you and dad be my parents."

Katherine choked up with tears. "Chris, we've only talked about this lightly in the past, but your dad and I have always felt that God had a special plan for you. I mean...now don't get mad at me, but look what you did during the past two days! You saved five lives...and PLEASE don't be modest about that! When God's ready to show you your path, don't fight it. Go with God."

"I will, Mother. I DO have one secret I've never told anyone...not you, not Dad, not even Billy."

"Are you ready to share it with us?"

"Maybe... You see, Mother, I'm not exactly sure...NOT YET! But, I've been seriously thinking about going into the priesthood. In case I change my mind, could that little secret be just between the two of us. I...I'm not ready to tell Dad just yet...and I, certainly, don't want to tell Billy about it. It'll be all over school."

Katherine dropped the wet bedclothes and hugged her son. Tears were streaming down her cheeks. "I'll keep your secret...but, my little secret is that I've always wished the same thing for you."

"Ha! Billy would have a convulsion if he knew what I'd just told you."

"You love Billy, don't you, Chris?"

"Yes, Mother. I love him like a brother and sometimes, even more than that. He's like one of our family to me."

"Does he feel the same way about you?"

"I hope so, Mother."

"I'm glad that you have someone your age to be that close to. Why don't you invite him over for a sleepover next weekend?"

"I'll think about it. He might have plans with Carolyn."

"He and Carolyn are going steady now?"

"Yes."

"And you have no little girl in your life?"

"No, just a big girl...YOU! If I'm going to be a priest, I'd better learn to get along without girls...at least until I know for sure that that's what I want to be."

"Oh, Lord! Look at the mess 'I' made when I dropped those wet clothes. Come on before I have to mop the floor in here AND in your bedroom."

"Thanks, Mother..."

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By Sunday evening, after Chris had had time to think about the hoopla that would be made over him at school the following day, Chris took Katherine's advice and stayed home. He was certain that the entire student body would have heard about the doughnut store and/or the traffic accident and Chris was in no mood of repeating the details of either episode all day long...nor did he want the accolade or distinction of being the town hero. He told his mother that he was merely stressed out...which she bought as a reason and allowed him to stay home Tuesday as well.

Chris' being absent on Monday disappointed Billy, as Billy really wanted to be seen with Chris and share some of the spotlight. Even though Billy had done nothing heroic at the crash, he was a witness to the scene which allowed him to stretch the truth a bit concerning what he and Chris had done in saving the children, the mother, and the other driver. Hopefully, the white lies wouldn't get back to Chris, so Billy didn't call Chris on Monday night to see why he was absent. BUT, when Chris failed to show up at school on the second day, as soon as the 3:30 pm bell rang, Billy made a beeline to Chris' house to see what was wrong with his best friend.

Billy was out of breath when he knocked on the Curtis' back door. Katherine answered and asked Billy to come in.

"Mrs. Curtis, is Chris all right? How sick is he?" Billy asked.

"He's in his room resting, Billy. Why don't you go tap on his door and let him know that you're here."

"Thanks, Mrs. Curtis..."

Billy ran up the stairs to Chris room and opened the door without knocking.

"Come on in, why don't you?" Chris said, surprised to see Billy, yet somewhat annoyed by Billy's rude entrance.

"Sorry...it's just that I was so damned worried about you!"

"You didn't bother to call me last night."

"Well, you didn't call me either!" Billy replied. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing really...I just didn't want to face hundreds of classmates with their praise and sympathy. I...I'd rather that they didn't know what happened."

"Too late! The WHOLE school knows. I heard Sister Sophia talking to Father Donovan about paying a tribute to you in chapel!"

"THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I DON'T WANT!"

"Chris, you could have every girl and guy in the school looking up to you!"

"I don't want that, Billy! I mean, if what I did is making such a ruckus, I might stay home for the rest of the week until the news became old news and everyone forgot about it!"

"Why are you so shy about being brave, Chris?"

"You and I are best friends, Billy, but we are opposite in so many ways. You're popular and like being popular. I just don't want to draw any attention to myself."

"Is that why you make 'B's' and 'C pluses' when I know you're capable of making straight 'A's'?"

"Maybe. A straight 'A' student is someone whom everybody looks at and despises him at the same time by trying to prove he's smarter than anyone else."

"Is that why you don't have a girlfriend? You want to be a loner in the crowd so no one will notice you?"

"Perhaps in the past I did that...but, something happened to me this weekend. Something for the better."

"Boy, I'll say. You saved nearly a half dozen lives."

"I...I hadn't planned on telling you this, not for a long time, anyway..."

"What? Don't tell me that you're gay?"

"Ha! I don't even know how to be straight and I know even less about being gay."

"Then, what?"

"Have you ever heard of someone receiving his calling?"

"You mean like hearing voices? A schizophrenic like Buddy Knowles?"

"No, you idiot! I mean when a person suddenly realizes what kind of work he wishes to strive for..."

"Shit! You want to be a paramedic?"

"No. Billy, come and sit on the side of my bed. I want to tell you something very personal and I don't want you to laugh."

"Uh oh! I'm dying to hear this"

Billy went to Chris bed, where he was lying, and sat on the side. Billy was almost shocked when Chris reached for Billy's hand and gripped it firmly.

"I...I don't know if I've ever told you about my birth."

"Oh, God! You descended to earth in a tiny spaceship like Clark Kent..."

"Billy! Stop it! I'm trying to be serious with you."

"I'm sorry..."

"When I was born, I almost killed my mother. I was born with collapsed lungs and I wasn't supposed to live."

"Damn! I never knew that!"

"I was told that when my live or die situation was touch and go, my dad went into the hospital chapel and dedicated my life to do God's work. I didn't know about this until my mother and dad told me when I was twelve years old. It frightened me for a long time. I hated it that they had chosen my profession for me. I couldn't be a fireman, or a policeman, or a football player, like most other kids. I felt that God expected me to follow the promise my parents had made to Him."

"And...?"

"Friday night when Joey came back to life. I felt a chill go down my spine. It reminded me of Christ when he brought Lazarus back from the dead. I saw a flash of light...just like I was in some science-fiction movie. That's the main reason I didn't come over to your house to sleep over...and then, when I got those kids away from the burning car and took them to their mother, I had another chill and a second flash. I fought my feelings all night but somehow, deep inside of me, I knew that God was talking to me."

"What did He say, Chris?" Billy was now very serious.

"I think he showed me that I need to go into the priesthood."

"Father Chris? You're joking!"

"No, I'm not, Billy...and you, as my best friend...I'm hoping you'll help me and respect my decision."

"Shit, man! I don't want to have to be holy around you all the time! I mean, you're not even through high school yet. How can you be so sure that you want to live a life like that? Damn! That means, you'll miss the prom! You'll go through life without ever having sex or knowing what it feels like to fuck a girl! YOU HAVEN'T EVEN LEARNED TO MASTURBATE YET!"

"Well, I'm years away from taking my final vows or being ordained. I'm still human, you know."

"Maybe so, but I don't want to read about you in the newspapers in the year 2006 where you've molested a dozen altar boys. I think that's why priests do it. They went through life without having sex and make up for the time they lost on young kids who are afraid to tell on them."

"Billy, I'm NOT going to molest altar boys, choir boys, or ANY boys!"

"You could practice on me and get it out of your system!"

"What?"

"I mean, since we are best friends, we could do innocent things together to keep you from wanting to do them later AFTER you've taken your vows!"

"Dear Lord! How could I have called you my best friend all these years when I've just discovered how dumb and insane you actually are?"

"What do priests who DON'T have sex or masturbate do? Wrap a tight rubber band around their dicks when they go to bed so that they won't have wet dreams like the ones you've been having every night?"

"No, you just remove sexual thoughts from your mind and think of pure things like flowers, waterfalls, bright sunny days..."

"BULLSHIT! You'll be smelling so many flowers in your sleep that you'll get hay fever! You'll drown in your sleep by jumping over waterfalls and you'll go blind with too much sun shining in your eyes while you've got your eyes closed."

"Why is it so important to you that I have a normal sex life?"

"Because it's important to me!"

"Why?"

"Do you want to become my father confessor for a few minutes?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, since you told me your biggest secret. Can I tell you mine? Remember, 'Father Chris', you're bound to secrecy by your priestly vows! You can't tell ANYONE!"

"All right. I'll keep your secret...but as your best friend, not your 'father confessor'!"

"Okay, but I'm not sure I can look into your eyes when I tell you. I mean, if I was really confessing, I'd be in the confessional and you'd be in the next booth where neither of us could see one another."

"Turn away from me and look at the wall. I won't look your way, either."

"Shit! This is so difficult for me...and I KNOW I'm gonna hate myself for telling you and YOU'RE probably gonna hate me too!"

"WHAT IS IT BILLY? QUIT STALLING! OUT WITH IT!"

Billy moved his body so that he was facing the opposite wall away from Chris.

"All right! Now don't YOU laugh! I didn't laugh at you!"

"I promise not to laugh!"

"Okay. You know that I masturbate and I masturbate a lot! Sometimes many times at night when I go to bed."

"I...I figured as much."

"Well, you see...when a guy is jerking off, he needs to think of things...usually DIRTY things before he can climax."

"No, I didn't know that...but go on..."

"This is really embarrassing! Chris, when I first began to masturbate, I would visualize having sex with a girl and doing ALL kinds of things to her naked body. When I first started going steady with Carolyn, I could get off in less than a minute! I would see her wide open wet pussy inviting me to stick my dick into it and I'd shoot her full of my semen."

"I guess all guys our age, with the exception of me, do that from time to time..."

"Yeah, well...not exactly. You see, for the past couple or three months, I haven't been fantasizing about Carolyn's pussy..."

"You've found a new girlfriend?"

"No! Carolyn is my one and only girlfriend."

"Then you fantasize about a movie star...some sexy glamour girl?"

"No, Chris. YOU'RE all I think about now!"

"ME?"

"Yes, YOU!"

"I...I don't have a pussy."

"I know, you dope! BUT I want to see your dick...touch it...put it into my mouth and suck it!"

"BILLY! STOP THAT! I won't be the brunt of one of your jokes!"

"I'm not kidding, Chris. What the hell do you think I wanted you to sleep over at my house. That night that you lay beside me, it was all I could do to keep from ripping off your pajamas and plunging my mouth on your dick!"

"I...I'm sorry to say this...but I kinda had a feeling that you might do something like that. I...I didn't sleep much as I pretended to sleep while all the time I was on guard toward your making a move on me."

"I...I KNOW I'm not gay, Chris! I shower with guys every day at school and never feel anything toward ANY of them. But when I'm with you, my dick stays hard until I can get home and jerk off. I don't know why I feel this way...I mean can a guy be queer for his best friend and no other guys at all?"

"I...I'm the wrong person to ask that, Billy!"

Billy suddenly turned and looked Chris directly into his eyes.

"Chris, would you ease my mind by answering ONE question truthfully?"

"I don't lie to you, Billy, ever!"

"Chris, do you ever get a hard on when you're around me?"

Chris blushed and dropped his head. "Uh...you...uh wanted the truth, right?"

"Yes!"

"I...I have on certain occasions."

"Do you think it was I, who made you get the hard on?"

"Well, you must be...because I'm not thinking about anyone else..."

"Thanks!" Billy jumped up from the bed and confronted Chris. "YOU SEE! THAT'S WHY YOU CAN'T BECOME A PRIEST! YOU TURN ME ON AND I TURN YOU ON!"

"I...I don't know what to say..."

"Remember when I kissed you and in a few minutes, you kissed me! Do you really think that was a 'brotherly kiss'?"

"We agreed that it was..."

"Then we BOTH lied about it!"

Billy lunged on the bed with one knee and put one hand on each of Chris' shoulders and pulled Chris forward enough to plant a huge kiss on Chris' lips.

"BILLY! NO! STOP IT!" Chris cried out, pushing Billy away. This didn't stop Billy's advances as he made a move toward Chris a second time, gripping Chris' upper arms tightly so that Chris couldn't move. He kissed Chris again.

Chris realized that Billy had him physically trapped. He couldn't move or fight Billy off, so he relaxed and let Billy have his way...perhaps the same as a woman does when she's being raped. Chris closed his eyes and exhaled heavily through his nostrils, not moving for several seconds...until he felt Billy release the hold on one of his arms and suddenly perceived that Billy had grabbed his penis...which was unusually erect. Billy couldn't be stopped now. He HAD to complete what he started even if it meant losing his best friend forever.

The excitement of the moment, compounded by Billy's tight lips against his own was more than Chris could stand because as soon as Billy put his hand under the sheet and blanket covering Chris and Billy's hand groped Chris' bare flesh, Chris had a tremendous orgasm, immediately. Chris opened his mouth to sigh or yell, whichever came first, and this was Billy's invitation to ram his tongue into Chris' mouth.

Chris was discombobulated with a plethora of strange emotions. Nothing had ever felt quite so pleasant and physically wondrous to Chris, but at the same time, he could feel the pulse pounding in his temples as his blood rushed to his face and head out of total embarrassment.

"OH, GOD! BILLY!" Chris sighed loudly in a vocal whisper. "WHAT DID YOU JUST DO TO ME?"

"I did nothing that you didn't want to happen. Chris, it HAD to happen. We're friends, sure! But like we said, the other night...we're MORE than friends."

"But I spilled my seed all over you..."

"So? You want to make it even and let me spill mine over you?"

"NO! Of course not! What we did was wrong!"

"CHRIS, what we did was one of the most beautiful things God created. He meant for men to have orgasms. That's why they feel so great! He didn't want us to go through life without experiencing ALL of His miracles! That's the very thing that creates life...and God wanted it to feel good. If there was a lot of pain to having an orgasm, life would have ended with Adam and Eve."

"Perhaps, but that seed was meant to fertilize an egg. THAT'S what creates life."

"Well, I think guys are supposed to learn HOW to do it before they try it with a woman. I mean, ifa guy DOESN'T know how to do it, his wife is disappointed and their marriage usually ends up in a divorce!"

"SO, according to you...ALL guys do it with each other until they're ready to do it for real with a woman!"

"MOST guys do...MOST BEST FRIENDS DO!"

"Billy, that's ridiculous and utter nonsense."

"All right...in retrospect...what we just did...was that a sin?"

"I...I don't know..."

"OF course you know. It was your first time! It felt GOOD! Now you know why God made it to feel good. You can understand now when some troubled kid, years from now, comes into your confessional and says, 'Forgive me, Father! I jerked off last night!' The kid was learning about life...the way God wanted him to."

"Yes, but, you didn't jerk me off. All you did was touch me and I exploded like Mount Vesuvius!"

"You won't, the next time!"

"Billy, there WON'T be a next time!"

"Oh, yes there will. When I leave to go home today, you're gonna want to experiment by yourself and suddenly you'll be filled with lots of questions you'll want to ask me...and the NEXT time will be better than the first...although you'll NEVER forget your first time!"

"I...uh, think you'd better go home now, Billy! I have a big mess to clean up before my mother sees it."

"You think your dad never tried this when he was our age? I'll bet your mother did too!"

"Billy? Please go...PLEASE!"

"I'll call you later tonight to see if you're coming to school tomorrow."

"I'll let my mother talk to you when you call and she'll give you my answer..."

"Well, if you're not at school tomorrow, I'll come by...the same as this afternoon."

"I won't let you in..."

"WANNA BET?"

Billy left. Chris looked down at the soiled sheets and pajamas and wondered if he could fake diarrhea for his mother a second time. What was even stranger...his penis was still erect. Surely he would find a way to make it go down before dinner.

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After Billy left, Chris decided to take a shower and appear to be clean and fresh during dinner. He did not give in to the impulse to masturbate by himself. The cool shower took care of his problematic penis...temporarily, at least. It was Tuesday night and the night when Katherine went to St. Anne's Church to discuss the flower arrangements for next Sunday's mass. She enjoyed the company of the other ladies on the flower committee and thought of their rendering decorations was to honor the church and all its' saints. Billy's mother, Angela, was also on the committee and in mid-Spring and early Autumn, she supplied a lot of the seasonal blooms for the floral arrangements from her personal garden.

Robert Curtis always washed the supper dishes on Tuesday night while Katherine went to her meeting. If Chris wasn't busy doing his school homework, often he would dry the dishes for his dad.

Chris had a good rapport with both his parents. He respected them and in turn, they treated Chris as a young adult. Not once in his life had Robert or Katherine ever punished him or even scolded him for some wrong-doing. It wasn't that Chris was a perfect child, it just wasn't in Chris' demeanor to get into trouble. Chris was a good boy, mostly because his parents had reared him that way. Since Chris had missed the first two days of school in the week, Chris had no homework to do. Therefore he joined his dad at the sink to help with the dishes.

"Feeling better, son?" Robert asked.

"A little, Dad," Chris replied.

"Do you think you'll be going to class in the morning?"

"I'm not sure, Dad. I...I'd like to stay home just one more day if it's all right with you and Mother."

"You're still not ready to hear the sound of the hero's fanfare?"

"No, I'm not. I keep hoping with each passing day that maybe the kids at school will forget about what happened over the weekend."

"You're probably right. Who knows, maybe one of the cheerleaders will strain her back trying to catch her pom-poms! That should make the entire school forget about your saving five lives!" Robert said, chuckling.

"If I thought that would get the attention off me, I'd try to help her strain her back!" Chris joked back at his dad.

"Did you have a nice visit with Billy this afternoon?"

"It was OK, I guess."

"You know your mother and I often said that if anything should ever happen to us OR the Russell's, it's nice to know that either one of you or Billy would still have two parents who loved you. Of course, the odds of anything happening are mighty slim, but we'd give Billy a home as I'm sure the Russell's would take you in. Both Charlie and Angela are aware as your mother and I, just how close you and Billy are...and how much you mean to each other."

"We've always thought of ourselves as being next of brothers."

"Is Billy still dating the Owens' girl, Carolyn?"

"Yeah, they're going steady now."

"So you have to share Billy with her?"

"Not exactly. I mean...well, it's not like Billy and I are attached that close or in THAT way..."

"I wasn't implying that there was some kind of romantic relationship between you and Billy, I just meant that Billy has to divide his time between his girlfriend and his best friend."

"Oh...yeah..."

"No little girl has caught your eye yet?"

"No, Dad. It's just that I'd rather read a good book than go to a dance or out on a date."

"I know it's nice to cuddle up in bed with a good book on a cold night, but a good book won't keep you warm the way a good wife would."

"Dad, I'm YEARS away of picking out a good wife."

"Still, it's nice to shop around until you find the type girl that interests you."

The dishes were finished, but Chris was not ready to end his conversation with Robert.

"Well, that about does it!" Chris said, putting away the last dish in the cupboard and hanging his towel on the drying rack.

"So, son, do you want to go to your room and read or do you feel like coming into the living room to watch TV. There are several good news shows on tonight, I'd like to watch."

"Dad?"

"Yes?"

"Could we just sit down and talk for a minute?"

"Sure! You want to talk about the weekend?"

"No, far from it!"

"All right. Is something troubling you?"

"Well, maybe..."

"Come on into the living room and sit. We'll talk in there." Chris followed his dad and took his seat on the couch next to him. "Now then, what would you like to talk about?"

"It's about something we've never talked about..."

"Uh oh! You mean the birds and the bees?"

"Well, kinda, but not really?"

"What does, 'kinda, but not really', supposed to mean?"

"Dad...oh, jeez, this is so embarrassing."

"Son, nothing is too embarrassing to talk about with your parents."

"OK!" Chris took a big breath and said, "Dad, do you know about masturbation?"

"Sure, son."

"Is it a sin?"

"Only if you make it one."

"What does THAT mean?"

"I mean that some things, boys keep to themselves about. Let me assure you that ALL boys do it or find out about it somehow...usually when they're by themselves."

"Uh...did you ever...?"

"Sure! Only I was younger than you when I found out about it."

"You were?"

"Well, I had tried it a few times when I felt it was safe and no one was around...that is, until one day, your grandmother walked in on me in my bedroom when I was lying on my bed naked as a jaybird with my erection in hand."

"Oh, God. I would have been mortified and died on the spot!"

"Believe me, I felt I wished I was dead."

"What happened?"

"She yelled at me to get dressed. Then she walked with me all the way to the church...St. Anthony's...and told me to go into the confessional and ask for forgiveness."

"WOW! You had to tell your priest about it?"

"Well, that's what your grandmother TOLD me to do...but actually, I didn't!"

"So what did you tell him?"

"I...lied to my priest and told him that I had cheated on a math test."

"You lied to your priest?"

"I figured that God had seen me masturbating and there was no reason to tell my priest what God already knew. So he told me to say twenty-five, 'Our Father's' and twenty-five 'Hail Mary's'. So I came out of the confessional, knelt on a prayer bench and said my contrition while my mother watched. This satisfied her and we went home. After that, I made sure she never caught me again."

"You mean, you still did it?"

"Yes, son. I did it frequently, until I married your mother. Somewhere, I had read that if a boy stored up his sperm without releasing it, he would have prostate problems later in his life. The way I looked at it was like when you have all this congestion in your nose and throat, it you don't blow your nose or spit it out of your throat, you're apt to choke to death on the phlegm."

"So according to you, masturbating is a necessary body function?"

"It's like I said. Some things boys keep to themselves. If you believe that God sees everything you do, why tell anyone who's less than God?"

"You sure made me feel different than the way I was thinking."

"Chris, have you begun to masturbate?"

"Not really."

"Come on! I told you my secret. It's all right if you HAVE begun. I..I would expect you to. Of course, if you'd rather keep it to yourself the way I did..."

"Dad, I wake up quite often and my bed and pajamas are covered in...sperm, as you call it."

"Wet dreams. They're normal because you're not releasing the fluid through masturbation."

"So, it's like I'm masturbating in my sleep and I don't even know about it!"

"Exactly."

"SO, if it's gonna happen anyway, then I might as well encourage the fluid to get out while I'm awake, huh?"

"I think that's what the good Lord intended when He gave us a penis and gonads."

"Do you think Jesus masturbated?"

"Jesus came down to earth to be like us...humans! I don't think that any of the four apostles, Matthew, Mark, Luke, or John would have written about what Jesus did when he was a teenager. They all write about him until he was twelve years old in the temple with the scribes and the Pharisees. Because the next thing any of them wrote about Jesus was when he was thirty years old."

"So you think Jesus did, huh?"

"More than likely. Otherwise, He couldn't've been a total human being."

"Do you think priests do it?"

"No one knows for sure, but I believe if they didn't, they would walk around with swollen testicles or limp with an enlarged prostate gland. We don't know what priests confess to other priests or even if they ever mention masturbation."

"All right, Dad, here's the deal. Billy wanted me to masturbate with him this afternoon."

"And did you?"

"Not exactly. I didn't want to do it because I didn't want to be guilty of sinning."

"Son, it's my opinion that ALL boys who have a best friend engage in masturbating together. It's a bond of friendship between them. It's a rite of passage. There's nothing wrong with sharing your biggest, darkest secrets with your best friend."

"It would have been all right if I HAD masturbated with Billy?"

"As long as you both were OK with it."

"Dad, I really wanted to...I mean, I told Billy about the 'wet dreams', as you call 'em and he wanted to show me what to do to get rid of them."

"So he masturbated with you this afternoon?"

"No, Dad. He touched me...JUST FOR A SPLIT SECOND...and I...I made a mess ALL over my bed and pajamas. I mean it was so darned quick. Then I got real embarrassed and asked Billy to leave."

"Did you clean your bed and pajamas?"

"No. I had a wet dream the other morning and when Mother saw the mess, I...I told her that I had diarrhea and had pooped in the bed. She washed everything for me."

"Are your bedclothes and pajamas still soiled?"

"Yeah, I...I couldn't like to Mother a second time. I...I was thinking about washing them after you and she had gone to sleep."

"Why don't WE go up and wash them before your mother gets home?"

"Boy, that's a GREAT idea."

"Chris, I'm not encouraging you to masturbate or do anything you choose NOT to do, but if you have any more accidents...like soiling your bedclothes or whatever, tell it to me privately, and I'll take care of your dirty linen and things."

"Thanks, Dad!"

"I won't say a word to your mother about it. That will be OUR secret...and another thing, don't stay angry with Billy. I'm sure he was just trying to help you out, the best way he knew."

"So if he comes over again and wants to...well, you know...You won't be mad at me?"

"Of course not! If I KNOW that he's up in your bedroom with you, I'll see what I can do to keep your mother busy downstairs until Billy leaves."

"I can't believe it's so easy to talk with you about something like this."

"Son, I love you. It was MY sperm which helped bring you into this world. You're an extension of me and your mother. If you have a problem, then it becomes MY problem. There's no reason why the two of us can't tackle the problem together!"

"We'd better go strip the sheets off my bed and get them into the washing machine!"

"Good idea, son. GOOD IDEA!"

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Chris got his mother's permission to stay home from school one more day. Then, he remembered Billy's saying that he would be by to see him as soon as school let out. In spite of the long talk with his dad, Chris was still leery about 'doing things' with his best friend. Billy was more experienced and had been 'doing it' longer and many more times than Chris which made Chris apprehensive about 'doing it' in front of and WITH his best friend. So Chris decided that he wouldn't be at home when and if Billy arrived after school.

At three-fifteen, fifteen minutes before the final school bell rang, Chris sneaked out of his house and went for a walk. He wanted to hide some place Billy couldn't find him or wouldn't even think of looking for him...and so, Chris decided to go to St. Anne's Church for a private devotional, light a few candles, say a few prayers...perhaps, kill time until Billy would get discouraged and go to his house.

To the left of the nave of St. Anne's was a small chapel. One had to walk down the main aisle of the church, practically to the main altar to even see the chapel. That's where Chris decided to hide...in the first pew of the chapel.

St. Anne's was empty when Chris arrived. When the large door of the church closed, it created an echoing 'BANG', so Chris knew if anyone entered after he was inside, he could peek to see whom it was...primarily, Billy.

At approximately, three-forty-five, Chris heard the front door open, followed by the big 'BANG'. He got up and eased his body around the entrance of the small chapel to see whom had entered.

IT WAS BILLY! Chris scrunched down to the floor and hid behind a tall statue of St. Paul. Billy walked down to the front of the nave, turned right, and went into a room behind the confessionals. Chris had never been through that door and wondered where it led...more importantly, how did Billy know to go there?"

Fifteen more minutes passed and Chris' curiosity got the best of him. He walked across the transept, stopping in the middle to genuflect and cross himself in front of the huge crucifix and the altar where the Host was kept. Slowly, he moved toward the mysterious door and eased it open.

Leading from the door was a small hallway with several more doors at the end. One was marked, caretaker, and another, janitor. Chris tiptoed down the hallway and as he approached the janitor's door, he thought he heard Billy's voice talking to an unfamiliar voice. It was not Father Crenshaw's. Chris put his ear to the door eaves to listen. It WAS Billy's voice...but whose voice was the other one? What was Billy doing here after school when he was supposed to be at Chris' house.

Carefully, millimeter by centimeter, Chris edged the door open until he saw something that shocked him speechless. Billy was sittin on a table without his pants and underwear. Kneeling in front of Billy was Titus Broomfield, the janitor, on his knees with his head bobbing to and fro on Billy's penis. Billy held his head back and was moaning blissfully.

Without thinking, Chris let the door slam with a thud while he ran back down the hall, through the mysterious door...back across the transept, stopping momentarily to genuflect, cross himself and run as fast as he could up the main aisle of the nave, out the large door, closing with a huge 'BANG', and then running all the way home, crying buckets of tears on the way.

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(To be continued in "Briarwood"---Book Ten---'Chris and beyond...'---chapter 107).