Angel's Wings (Part 14) Written by JM
--- Da da da da da... what to write, what to write? Hmmm, it's about celebrities... yeah, that sounds good. Two very moral celebrities too... ooh yeah, that makes it better. Let's see, what else... oh yeah, these two male celebrities are together, but that has nothing to do with their actual personal lives. Ha ha, oh yeah, forgot this one... it's fiction ALL THE WAY! Is that it? I think so... wait, no... please be 18 or older or have your parents permission. Parental Guidance is suggested. Need some popcorn? Maybe a soda? Got to have the Twizzlers... remember, 'Silence Is Golden'! Okay, let's move on to to the previews... ---
--- Rated PG-13: Hey, I'm back! That's right and I thought I could stay away. No, I prayed I could stay away, but this is in my blood. I've just got to write. Anyway, I'm glad to be back with another exciting verse in the song of Brian and Justin's lives. Please remember that these stories are based on the romance created for Brian and Justin through 'Brian and Justin' and 'Just Beginning'. This is not called 'JC and Nick' or 'Lance's Beginnings,' so please respect the fact that they will not get all the attention in the world. If you don't know by now, send all comments to: catsfan1@hotmail.com Thank you very much! Enjoy the show... ---
-- I do realize that the program mentioned in this chapter was filmed in March and aired on MTV in March, but because this is fiction, I can do what I want. So in this fictious reality, this program was done in the beginning of April and airs in April on MTV. Thanks for understanding. --
--- Feature Presentation: Angel's Wings, Rated NC-17 ---
- Dedicated to the readers (Just to name a few that write me regularly): Daniel, Ryan, Jim, Braxton, Gretchen, Eddie, Metra, Carrie, Manny, Stephen, Annie, and ALL the others! Sorry if I didn't name you but that doesn't mean I don't love you or appreciate you because trust me, I LOVE ALL THE READERS! *
The scent of coffee filled his nostrils as he blew quickly over his steaming cup of early afternoon coffee. The morning was gorgeous, filled with pinkish-orangy clouds and birds flying high above. He had watched the sunrise alone before he made a trip to a few radio stations, promoting his group and informing fans that they were in town for three days, performing their live concert on two of those days. It had been business as usual that morning and he had yet to speak with his husband or his son. It seemed everytime he called from his cellular phone, no one would answer from his Orlando home. 'Probably out handling *NSYNC business,' he told himself, walking down the hallway of his hotel, headed directly for his room for a quick nap. Entertaining fans in the lobby for a half-hour was difficult, especially when he had no real reason to smile except when they pleaded or when they complimented him on how good he looked with his husband and son. 'April 2nd... by April 6th, I'll be on my way home... I'll be home. I'll be in his arms. I'll be kissing him constantly, tasting those smooth lips and feeling his strong arms around my waist.' he told himself, perking up at the thought.
The tour was almost over and he felt more than ready to return to a normal home-life for a few weeks. He loved the notion of waking up in his husband's arms again and feeding his son breakfast and taking him to the nearby park and visting his in-laws once a week for a dinner or to just talk and spend quality family moments together. He'd love to see in his den with his son sleep next to him while he talked and laughed with Joey and Britney, even though he knew he wouldn't be able to laugh with them together. And to take a swim with his son and his husband for a few hours, to hold his husband in the backyard while the dogs ran around and his son chased them. Everything about it sounded good again. Just his husband's name falling from his lips during sex sounded wonderful.
His eyes closed and he sighed, walking slower, dreading entering his room alone without someone to call or someone to make him smile the way his husband did. Someone to bring out the real side of him, the cuddly one, the adorable one, that one that walks on the clouds with nothing but God and love guiding his every step.
"You know, it's not wise to walk down the hallway carrying a cup of hot coffee with your eyes closed." a voice spoke to him and sent his body and mind into shock. He had to rewind the words in his mind, the voice, the slight accent, the brightness, and everything that filled the tone. No. It wasn't possible, not at this time, not when he was just thinking about him.
His eyes blinked open and he spoke slowly. "Justin?" he asked cautiously, squinting his eyes as he stared a little down the hall, right next to his door, and it was true. "Hey there Bri. Miss me much?" Justin questioned, his hands burried deep in his pockets as he leaned on the door with a goofy smile that covered his face like liquid sunshine. "Baby?" Brian asked again, approaching Justin slowly, shivers gracing his body as he got closer.
He couldn't believe Justin was here, right now, right before him and he didn't really want to question why or how because he had Justin right there, right where he needed him.
Brian lifted his hand and ran it against Justin's cheek. Real. He was real as can be. Warm, soft, and undeniably adorable. "Hmmm, I guess this surprise was a bit much for ya, huh baby?" Justin asked, growing softer under Brian's touch. Brian spread his fingers and let them trace over Justin's nose, his mouth and under his eyes. "Yeah, but it's a good one." Brian whispered back.
Brian felt Justin's cheeks rise as he smiled wider for Brian. He missed it all so much, everything that was right there in his sight, under his touch, within his breath, sharing his oxygen and sharing that funny feeling stirring in his stomach. "Do you want something to eat? Do you want to go out? Do you want to go see the guys? Wanna go swimming?" Brian shot out his questions, his own smile flickering with playfullness and joy. Justin giggled softly, shaking his head and pulling back from Brian's curious hand.
He could see the excitement in Brian's glassy blue eyes. He wanted to do everything with Justin and Justin knew it, but he didn't want to use up all of his energy or waste a second without being able enjoy what he had. He wanted to enjoy his Brian.
"I want to kiss you." Justin said with a low voice, pulling his hands out of his pockets and opening his arms to Brian. He waited until Brian took a small step forward before lacing his arms around Brian's neck, feeling the distance Brian tried to keep because of the cup of coffee in his hands. Justin titled his head slightly and looked into those eyes of pure blue. They were beautiful, gorgeous, loving, and so perfect.
Justin ran his fingers over Brian's hair, arching an eyebrow with subtle surprise. "You cut your hair shorter?" Justin wondered, breaking their gaze to stare at the hair as he ruffled it. Brian gave him a small nod, still fixating his eyes on Justin's magnificence. "And it's blonder." Justin noted, running his fingers through it with amazement. "Yeah, AJ did that for me a couple of nights ago. I'm growing accustom to it." Brian responded nonchalantly, rubbing a hand over Justin's shoulder. He had to make sure again. He had to be sure Justin was real and right before him like he wanted.
"I like it." Justin smiled, still running his finger through it. Brian couldn't help but smile. "What about your hair? You keep cutting it, don'cha?" Brian inquired, lifting his hand to run his fingers over the soft but prickly hair. "Yeah. I think I like it better short." Justin replied, his voice still soft and tantalizing.
Brian thought that over. Justin's hair short? Always. Never seeing those golden-brown curls anymore? Never being able to tug on them when he's frustrated or worried? Never running his fingers through their softness for confidence and strength? Never being able to brush his sweaty hands over them during passionate, wet sex? "I want my curls back." Brian demanded quietly, pouting. Justin laughed, his laugh sweet and sexy. "You can't have 'em." Justin replied within his laughter. "I want my kiss." Justin said frankly, rubbing Brian's shoulder. Brian continued to pout. "Trade?" Brian offered, a smooth smile dimpling his cheeks. "A kiss for my curls?" Justin wondered, slipping his hand into the collar of Brian's shirt to rub the skin of Brian's shoulder.
Brian's eyes started to close at the feel of Justin's hand on his skin again. "No, I just want my kiss damn it." Justin sneered, leaving a small peck on the tip of Brian's nose. His lips drifted lower and he soon captured his prize, taking in his husband's lower lip before locking his full lips onto Brian's thin ones.
"Mmmm." Brian hummed while kissing Justin, feeling his husband's slick tongue lick at his teeth as his mouth opened slightly. 'This could get rather friendly and I'm still holding his damn cup of coffee.' Brian thought, tilting his head to give Justin greater access to his lips and mouth. He felt Justin's tongue massage his in the same motion Justin's hand massaged his shoulder. He moaned into the kiss as Justin's other hand held his head, the kiss getting a little rougher, a little wetter, a little more than Brian expected. He couldn't deny it though. It was real. It was Justin and it was what he wanted.
Justin pulled back solemnly, raking his teeth over Brian's mouth lip with a cunning smirk drawn across his lips. "I missed that." Justin smiled, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. Brian merely panted and nodded, his body slightly numb.
Justin snickered at his husband's stillness, rubbing a thumb over Brian's lips. "So is this a business or pleasure visit?" Brian asked, his voice quiet but draped with a Southern accent. Justin smiled, lowering his thumb to rub over Brian's chin. "Business... but I wouldn't mind a little pleasure." Justin responded with a subtle lustful glimmer in his eyes. Brian felt a smile spread across his lips. "I think I can handle that," Brian chimed, grabbing Justin's wrist and lowering his hand to his chest. Justin felt the heartbeat thump across his fingertips, the passion rippling through Brian's body. "But what's the business part?" Brian asked as Justin watched his hand on Brian's chest. Justin cleared his throat, rubbing at Brian's chest through his shirt. "Well, me, Chris, and JC are in town for this MTV show they're doing. It's a tribute to Janet Jackson called MTV Icon. At first we weren't going to show up here in Cali, we were just going to tape a video and send it, but since Chris wanted to visit Meelah and JC decided maybe he should check on Nick, I thought that..." Justin's words trailed off as he he looked up, blush creeping into his cheeks. He felt Brian's steady stare on him, those blue eyes holding him safely. "Well, I haven't seen you or touched you or held you or kissed you in a little over three weeks. I couldn't do it anymore and it made it too perfect that you guys were going to be in town the same day they were doing the taping for the special. I could use that as a business excuse to get away from Johnny and all." Justin explained, his voice lowering with defeat.
Brian laid a gentle kiss on Justin's cheek, rubbing his lips over the soft skin. "I missed you that much too baby." Brian whispered, pulling back to look into those glittery blue eyes. He felt Justin's arms wrap around his waist and hold him close. He placed another soft kiss on Justin's forehead, rubbing his back with one hand. "I want to go shopping now." Justin whispered into Brian's ear as Brian pulled back. Brian laughed, his soft giggle sending flutters to Justin's heart. "I guess I have to call Marc and tell him we're going to Rodeo Drive then, huh?" Brian asked with a smile. Justin nodded happily. "I told Bastian that I'd bring him something back from L.A." Justin chimed as Brian turned until they were side-by-side. Brian arched an eyebrow curiously. "So we're not going to build up your closet this trip?" Brian asked teasingly, leading Justin down the hall. Justin nudged him before shaking his head. "No, just our son's and your's." Justin grinned as they walked. "Mine?" Brian questioned, turning his head in Justin's direction. Justin let out a low laugh, licking his lips quickly. "Oh yeah baby. I saw you on MTV the other day and you weren't dressed that hot." Justin joked as Brian led him down the hallway, his head shaking with a low laughter.
He had begged for just a little time away from everything. He didn't want to be a Backstreet Boy for four hours. He wanted to sleep, cry, curse, and be miserable in his dark hotel room until he had to come out for dinner. Everyday felt like another day of pain and misery for him and all he wanted was time to live in that misery. No one knew about him crying on his bus at night except for Brian. He only let the others see his angered not, but not saddened one. 'Because I'm Nick fucking Carter and I'm aloud to be a bitch about things, but I can't be a little Mary Sue crying over my fucked up marriage or my fucked up family or my life in general.' he told himself daily. His music was his escape, sometimes, but it seemed like every song he was writing now was about him. Sometimes they were happy, after a decent phone call from his husband and other times they were recreations of a sad tale in his life, one lived with his husband.
Nothing went right for him and he was beginning to expect the pain. He was accepting that his mother would never accept his marriage or that his husband always seemed to be with one of his old flames, whether it be the ex-boyfriend, ex-girlfriend, best friend or whomever. Nothing fit. It never did and he let out a few more tears while listening to Destiny's Child harmonize through his room in a soft melody, one that couldn't drownd out the sounds of someone knocking at his door.
It's over and done
But the heartache lives on inside
And who is the one you're clinging to
Instead of me tonight?
And where you are now? (Now that I need you)
Tears on my pillow (Wherever you go, go)
I'll cry me a river (That leads to your ocean)
(You'll never see me fall apart)
In the words of a broken heart
It's just emotions taking me over
Caught up in sorrow, lost in the song
But if you don't come back, come home to me darlin'
(Don't you know that there's no)
Nobody left in this world to hold me tight
(And don't you know there's no)
Nobody left in this world to kiss goodnight
With clumsy steps, he made it to the door, but he merely leaned on it, listening to the music while trying to rid his eyes of bitter tears. He knew his eyes were probably red and puffy and would shows signs of his crying and he debated just walking away from the door and screaming at the person knocking, but then another sure knock came and he felt it against his shoulder. "Who.. W-Who is it?" he asked lowly, his head up against the door as he caught another tear. There was no answer and he really didn't expect one. Someone cared enough to knock or maybe they didn't, but he couldn't walk away now. He wanted to. He wanted to fall back down on his bed and cry away the rest of these stubborn tears, but he couldn't.
I'm there at your side
Apart of all the things you are
But you've got a part of someone else
You've gotta go find your own shining star
And where you are now? (Now that I need you)
Tears on my pillow (Wherever you are)
I'll cry me a river (That leads to your ocean)
(You'll never see me fall apart)
In the words of a broken heart
He pulled his fingers through his deshelved, almost spikey, blonde hair before laying the hand on the knob, turning it slowly and yanking the door open. He stood there, eyes adjusting the the light of the hall and mouth slowly falling open. This wasn't an angel, but he knew it had to be God-sent. He was right there. Right when he needed him, he was right there, watching a fearless tear slip down his cheek. Those tears were for him and him only. Every emotion he thought was tangled in the strings of his heart, leaving him weak with subtle joy.
"I talked to Tim and he said you've been down for the past week and a half. He said you demanded to be alone until dinner." he whispered while lifting his hand to wipe tears from his husband's face. "Josh?" he asked as the hand made contact with his face. "Nicky, what's wrong?" JC asked his husband, rubbing the tears away. Nick couldn't speak. There were too many emotions, too much pain, too much joy and too much of everything that had happened to him sizzling through his body. He was caught up, caught up in JC's eyes, his thick lips, his care. "I can't do it anymore Josh... I can't keep up with all of this guilt, this loneliness, this..." Nick stopped himself. He couldn't say that. What would it mean if he did? Would it mean the end of the relationship? Because if it did, Nick didn't want that.
Arms wrapped around him, pulled him close while pushing him into the dark of the room. He felt a gentle kiss on the top of his head and security surrounded him. "You don't have to say it all right now Nicky." JC assured him as he closed the door and held Nick. Nick felt warm, he felt secure, he felt loved by his husband for that brief moment as all of his emotions took over and he cried, cried everything he had left in him onto JC's chest.
It's just emotions taking me over
Caught up in sorrow, lost in the song
But if you don't come back, come home to me darlin'
(Don't you know that there's no)
Nobody left in this world to hold me tight
(And don't you know there's no)
Nobody left in this world to kiss goodnight
"Who's going to have the best dressed toddler in Orlando?" Justin crooned out his question, giving Brian's hand a light squeeze. Brian giggled quietly, turning his head in Justin's direction as they walked down the long sidewalks of Rodeo Drive. "Uhm... I think you want me to say our son, right?" Brian wondered, trying to surpress his laughter at the overly happily grin on Justin's face. "Duh." Justin responded, pulling the brim of his hat down a little lower to remain unnoticeable to others walking past them. He rolled his eyes proudly, licking his bottom lip as Marc led the way down the street.
"I still want to go back to Tiffany's and get you that chain and charm." Brian noted, scrunching his nose to fix his sunglasses. The sun beamed a glittery light on them as they walked through the semi-crowds, Justin searching for the next shop with Marc guarding them. "Baby, I don't want you to spend that much on me." Justin replied, staring at the Guess shop with a question in his eyes. "But I want to spend that much on you." Brian whined, hooking his fingers into the beltloop of Justin's jeans. Justin didn't reply this time. Brian could feel Justin's mind had drifted to something else and he found a small scowl on Justin's face as Justin stared at something, at someone. "What? What are you looking at?" Brian asked, giving a small tug to the back of Justin's jeans.
Justin narrowed his eyes before cursing under his breath. "Fuck, can't I come here without having to deal with this press shit? All I wanted was to surprise my husband and go shopping." Justin muttered in pure anger, ducking his head some as he felt the camera snap another picture of the two walking together. "Huh?" Brian squeaked out, glancing to the area Justin's eyes had once been. Sure enough, a man stood snapping pictures of the two walking. He was a photographer, probably one for a tabloid or a local newspaper or something. It didn't matter. He was still invading Justin and Brian's need for privacy and still ruining their trip on Rodeo Drive.
Brian skid an arm around Justin's waist, smiling against Justin's cheek as he attempted to lay a kiss there. "Let him enjoy it while he can babe. The only thing that matters to me is that I have my J-U-S-T-I-N." Brian whispered, feeling Justin's cheek move slightly as he tried to smile.
Justin wanted to be mad. He wanted to be vindictive, angry, and he wanted to seek revenge but he couldn't. It was impossible to be that heated with Brian speaking softly, with that candy-sweet Southern accent, into his ear and his thumb rubbing the small of his back and those lips leaving quick kisses on his cheek. How could he even want to be mad? Brian was too strong for him. Brian was too calm for him and being anywhere near that calmness left him unable to attempt to be angry.
"You suck." Justin sighed out, a foolish smile lacing his lips. "Yes, I do give good head, don't I?" Brian teased his husband, ushering him along the sidewalk in attempt to keep the same pace as Marc. Justin laughed lowly, elbowing his husband in the ribs. His husband did give good head, incredible head. The way his tongue curled around his penis and the way his lips kissed his slit right before he swallowed a majority of the organ into his mouth. Justin got shivers thinking about it and maybe being watched by others wasn't so good right now? Not with his cock beginning to swell uncomfortably in his boxer-briefs.
She tapped the toe of her shoe on the ground while leaning on the counter with crossed arms. She couldn't remember the name Brian used most often when checking into a hotel and she knew there was no way she would contact anyone that would knew, except Justin. But how would she contact Justin? By cell phone? He wasn't answering his. 'Call Brian's phone genius.' she told herself, leaning off of the counter and reaching down toward her purse.
She pushed falling strands of her hair behind her ear while unzipping her purse to pull out her cell. 'Oh fuck, wait, didn't Brian change his cell number?' she thought, sighing helplessly. She turned her eyes on the receptionist, squining at her because she knew the receptionist had a number to contact Brian at but she wasn't giving it to her because the woman was pretending to be a secret keeper, hiding information to get brownie points from her boss. "Stupid bitch." she muttered under her breath, turning to face the doors, considering walking out even though this was the hotel she would be staying at.
"Britney?" a voice called to her and she hesitantly turned her head, hoping that maybe her bodyguard would step in front of her to hide her from any loud-mouthed, screaming wildly fans. Her eyes caught Christina Aguilera approaching her, a vintage ripped tee with a glittered photo of Billy Idol on the front. Her jeans hung onto her hips and a glitzy smile covered her face.
Britney found a smile to offer her friend as Christina strutted toward her, long-flowing braids in Christina's hair. It was a relief to see Christina in a lobby filled with quick stares and glances. "What's up girl?" Britney asked, opening her arms for an embrace. Christina gladly accepted the hug, her grin enough to speak words of joy. "Nothing much girly. I'm just here for that Janet Jackson show. What about you?" Christina replied, pulling back. "I'm doing a movie out here and I got an invitation to the show and I figured I'd go with Brian and Justin since Justin said he was probably gonna go." Britney responded, leaning against the counter again. Christina nodded, tossing a few of her braids behind her hair. "Are you staying at this hotel?" Christina asked, glancing around as others passed them by, a few giving them hard looks of disbelief. Britney nibbled her lower lip while nodding, self-conscious with all the eyes on her. "Good. Me and Jorge are staying here too and now I've got my girl to chill with too." Christina chimed, her smile still bright and cheery. "Oh, how is he? Jorge?" Britney wondered, pushing hair behind her ear again. "Still with me if that says much." Christina giggled and Britney couldn't help but let out a small snicker.
Britney suddenly felt less uncomfortable and more in the mood to smile. She had Christina with her and it seemed to push away those clouds of frustration. "How's your guy?" Christina wondered, fiddling with one of her braids while keeping her solid blue eyes on Britney. Just one question and all the happiness, the peace faded and Britney was caught once again in that rain of frustration. She couldn't pass it off or disguise it from Christina. It was too obvious, too clear for anyone to see. "I broke up with him on Valentine's Day." Britney said softly, a sorrowful sigh following her words. "Jesus, you and Joey? Through? That doesn't seem right. Hasn't it been like two years?" Christina asked, completely thrown by the revelation. Britney nodded, lowering her head to hide her dismay and sadness.
Christina laid a hand on Britney's shoulder, hoping her friend would find comfort in her. "I'm sorry to hear that Brit'." Christina said softly. Britney forced herself to smile, looking up again. "It's been almost two months now. I'm fine." Britney assured her, her almond eyes telling a different story. Christina ignored what she knew was truth and smiled for Britney. Britney didn't need to talk about it anymore and relive it anymore. She just needed to forget it and Christina knew that feeling completely.
"Man, I'm so glad you're here. I mean, outside of Jorge, I thought I'd be stuck talking to stupid people like Usher or hear the holy-talk from Jessica Simpson about why we should all stay virgins until marriage." Christina teased, sliding an arm around Britney's shoulders. "What a concept, right?" Britney giggled, pushing away thoughts of Joey to return to a world of freedom. "Yeah. Plus I didn't want to talk to all of those stupid actresses either." Christina remarked, leaning back against the counter with Britney. Britney's eyes peered at the door and her eyebrow arched. She had almost missed what Christina said as she stared at the woman walking through the lobby, her head high and her hair pulled up into a tight bun. "Like Leighanne fucking Wallace." Britney hissed out, her eyes following the woman.
Christina laughed quietly, overlooking what Britney saw. "Yeah, like that bitch Leighanne." Christina agreed, her head turning in Britney's direction.
She lowered her laughter when seeing Britney's intense expression, Britney's eyes locked on something other than Christina. Christina quickly turned her head and found what Britney found so interesting. Leighanne Wallace. The bitch Leighanne Wallace. She was walking through the lobby in a slow, actress-like waltz, moving straight for the stairs to head upward. "What the fuck?" Christina grumbled, slipping her arm off of Britney's shoulders. "I don't know Chrissy, but I think we should find out." Britney whispered back, keeping her eyes on Leighanne. Christina nodded briskly, her own eyes keeping a strict stare on Leighanne.
And they followed her. They followed her all the way up to the eighth floor and they stayed more than enough steps behind to remain unnoticed. They even dared to peek around the corner of the hall to watch her knock at a door for a few moments, her arms crossed when the door finally opened. "This bitch is up to something." Christina hissed, squaring her eyes as she watched Leighanne tap her foot across the ground, her hips shaking and her head centered. Britney nodded her head slowly, still keeping her focus on Leighanne.
"You know, I don't like having to come almost half across town because that little shit wants to make an unexpected visit to L.A. Especially when our little friend is going through some kind of drama trip." Leighanne said, her voice curt and less-than-thrilled with standing in the hallway of the hotel. "I'm sorry Leigh, but it's imperative that you be here." a deep voice said, leaving a questionable look on Britney's face.
That voice, so familiar to her, couldn't have been true. She didn't want to look down there and see his face, but she did, the second he peeked out into the hall, a grim look on his face as he stared at Leighanne.
"Has our little friend done anything stupid yet, Kev'?" Leighanne asked, unfolding her arms to rest them on her hips. Kevin shook his head, taking a small, fearful step into the hall. He was close to Leighanne. Leighanne Wallace. The same Leighanne that tried countless time to breakup his cousin's marriage, the woman who had ruined his own relationship with Nikki, and his ally through everything. "I just know he's going to break soon. Especially with him here to put the pressure on." Kevin replied, his voice low but still distinguishable.
"What the fuck are they talking about? Brian? Justin?" Christina began to ask in a tight voice. Britney quickly threw a hand over Christina's mouth, muffling any words she spoke. She didn't want to be caught. She didn't want to have to confront Leighanne, not yet. She had to know more and she had to find assistance outside of Christina. "Just wait Chrissy..." Britney whispered, still watching Leighanne and Kevin talk, her ears perked up and her eyes lowered.
"Oh, our little friend won't break if he knows what's good for him. He knows what it'll cost him and he knows what he'll have afterward. We don't have to worry about him." Leighanne said with assurance running through her voice. "What about the other guy? He's here and you know that pain in the ass is going to figure something out." Kevin noted, leaning against his door. Leighanne giggled evily. It was a sound that sent a feiry shiver up Britney's arms and left Christina growling lowly. "That piece of shit is the least of my concerns. What is he? Nothing. This is going to work and after tomorrow, we'll be able to continue with what we've been doing. Our little friend will be happy, you'll be happy, and trust me, once it all comes together, I'll be more than happy wearing the name I should be wearing." Leighanne boasted. She gave Kevin a light shove and skid by him, slipping into his room and then the door shut.
Britney stood there, a face of shock and discouragement while Christina kicked a nearby wall, her fists slammed shut. "That bitch, that bitch, that bitch, that bitch." Christina grumbled, beating her hands on the wall like a child. Britney barely swallowed, her mind trying its best to solve what she knew she might not be able to solve. 'Not in time to stop whatever these two have planned.' Britney thought, leaning against the wall Christina pounded on. The pounding on the wall mimicked the pounding in her heart and she lowered her head, discouraged and silent.
He had never been so confined. He used to know what it meant to be free of troubles, problems that plagued the heart. Now? He didn't know up from down or in from out or this from that. It was his own fault. He had persued his best friend for a more intimate relationship and he had let his feelings for the woman that taught him love confuse him, but he never expected to have these feelings tie in with his love for his husband. And what about his ex-fiancé? Were the feelings not there too? Didn't those feelings had it hardest for him? Seeing him with another man, seeing those green eyes stare at someone else with a glimmer of love that used to shine brightest for him?
It was sickening, terrofying, overwhelming, yet fascinating at the same time. How could this one man feel so bound to four people? Maybe it was his need to reclaim their love, their trust, their bodies? It didn't matter much once he looked at it through sober, awakened eyes. It was all shit and he was the asshole sitting in it. The perfect situation for a perfect excuse to seek out a perfect answer to a question he just didn't comprehend.
"Josh?" his husband called out in a sobbing voice. JC glanced down, running nimble finger through his husband's hair, the thoughts still leaving clawmarks on the door to his mind. "Yes Nicky?" he replied softly, his upper body resting against the headboard of Nick's bed, the room still caped in a sheet of darkness and shadows. Nick was curled up to his body, crying occasionally over something JC didn't know about. But at the moment, JC didn't really want to know. His time was short and he couldn't wait. Whatever kept tears falling from Nick's eyes was just another added trouble to his life and he refused to accept that trouble.
"Are you still going to that Janet Jackson thing?" Nick asked and JC had forgotten he had even mentioned it to Nick. They had said little to nothing in the few hours JC had been in Nick's room. Just soft music, a few sobs from Nick and JC humming along with the stereo. "No, Nicky, I'm not going to go. I'm not going to leave you here alone baby." JC replied and his voice could not be more sincere. He hungered for someone to want him to be somewhere, someone to want him to be close. He felt Nick grab his hand and pull it close to his face, Nick's lips laying a promising kiss on JC's palm.
Could it have been hope? A sign? Something to help him cope with this incessant sufferage? Just possibly.
The smile curling across his face sparkled with that possible hope and he rubbed his index finger over Nick's round nose, touching it, loving it and remembering everything about it. "I love you honey." Nick whispered, cuddling closer to JC's legs. It killed and hurt just a little to hear the words repeated again. He loved Nick too and it cost him too much to fight that love, but it was like a pocketfull of pennies compared to what he wanted from Justin or Nikki or Lance or someone.
Justin flipped through another channel on the TV and settled on MTV, his eyes watching Eminem contently on a rerun of some show. He bobbed his head along to the low music from the television and he didn't bother turning it up. He had already flipped through all of the hotel stations at least twice, even catching the already-seen movies playing and the cheap pornos that never satisfied him like Brian did.
Out the corner of his eye, he watched Brian push open the bathroom door, the sounds of the water flushing down the toilet causing him to keep his eyes forward. He discreetly watched Brian towel off his hands, his shirt still untucked from his khaki's and his hair looked a little wet as if Brian had run slippery wet fingers through it. He licked his lips unintentionally. Emineim was no longer keeping his attention, but he kept his head straight, hoping to fool his husband long enough to see Brian tuck his button-down shirt back in so he just might catch a quick glimpse of Brian's crotch and then he knew he'd be hard.
"What'cha watchin'?" Brian asked, his country twang flowing easily with his words. Justin sighed tiredly, finally letting his eyes find the screen again. "MTV." he replied dully, holding the remote up. Brian made a humming noise and Justin had to roll his eyes. "Looks kind of stupid to me Just." Brian said, passing by the television to move toward his luggage. "What are you talking about? Eminem's a hottie." Justin declared boldly, sitting up in the bed. He smiled wickedly when catching Brian stare back, a furrowed brow and tight lips greeted him. "Excuse me?" Brian asked, his eyes squinting slightly. "White boy got it goin' on." Justin crooned, licking his lips slyly. He kept his eyes on Eminem, taunting Brian by quickly adjusting himself and keeping his hand there, laying right over his crotch where there was no erection buildin, but he faked it to keep Brian's attention. "Oh he is, is he?" Brian asked, his voice tight and Justin saw Brian's arms folded over his chest. "Yep." Justin replied chipperly and he could tell he had annoyed Brian.
"Gimme that remote." Brian demanded, face scrunched up as he ushered toward the bed. Justin giggled lightly, holding the remote out in the opposite direction. "No." he responded, laughing loudly as he felt Brian place a knee on the bed, reaching out for the remote. "Justin, give it here." Brian grumbled and Justin scooted away quickly. He felt Brian's hand wrap around his arm, holding him still as he laughed. "No!" he shouted back with laughter. Brian couldn't fight a smile as Justin's face heated up with the laughter, his eyes tightly shut and his lips pulled apart. "Give me the damn remote Justin." Brian growled, a snicker breaking through his words. Justin continued to laugh, shaking his head while keeping the remote at a distance.
Brian grinned evily as he began to tickle his husband, hoping Justin would eventually drop the remote and give into him. "Stop! Stop it Bri, baby, stop. Please... I'm gonna pee on myself!" Justin laughed out, tears creeping out of the tight corners of his eyes. "Either give up the remote or tell the hotel while my sheets smell like urine." Brian said, reaching just below Justin's abdomen where he was most ticklish.
Justin couldn't stop the laughter or the kicking. Brian was reaching his most ticklish points and he hated that Brian knew them. "I'd rather pee in your mouth than give in!" Justin hollered out, hilarity still consuming him.
Brian found the words too amusing to continue. He dropped his hands to Justin's side, snickering lowly as Justin spat out his last fit of giggles.
"Hmmm, I bet you would've peed in my mouth." Brian said, a sweet smile on his lips as he hovered over Justin, pulling the remote from his husband's fingers and clicking off the TV. Justin nodded with another small laugh. "But if I did that, you wouldn't come to this Janet Jackson thing with me." Justin replied, his face finally beginning to turn a shade lighter. He cupped Brian's waist in his hands, smiling foolishly up at his husband. "Uhm, I never said I was going." Brian replied frankly, his light blue eyes staring directly into Justin's.
A tight pout bubbled over Justin's glossy reddish-pink lips. "Why not?" Justin whined, wrinkling Brian's shirt between his long fingers. Brian sighed, rocking to the side in attempts to get off of his husband. "I just don't feel like going to some industry thing and mingling with all of those actors and actresses, pretending that I liked their movies or music or whatever." Brian replied. Justin's grip tightened on his shirt and he had nowhere to go. Justin wasn't going to let him get up because Justin wanted Brian to see the pout on his face. Brian hated that. "But you're going with me." Justin cheered, tugging Brian down. Brian sighed again, brushing a hand over Justin's hand while shaking his head. "Doesn't mean I won't have to schmooze while the press hounds you. Plus we'll be there with Chris and JC too and I don't feel like doing that." Brian said, his voice dry and filled with dullness.
Justin scrunched up his face, trying to lick away his pout to bring joy back to Brian. "Please, Brian, for me? It's something I want to do. Think about all the times we've listened to a Janet Jackson song or kissed to one, danced to one and even made love to one. Her music is special to me and I think its had its special moments in our relationship too." Justin said, his voice softer but still loaded with loving pleas.
From one lover to another, they could see those memories in each other's eyes, the time they made love while 'Antyime, Anyplace' played and when they danced to 'Let's Wait Awhile.' Brian sucked in his lower lip, hoping to stay strong while looking into those aquamarine oceans of care and want. He felt one of Justin's hands unfastened from his shirt and slide down over the sheets, pulling up something from under them and then the sounds of a soft, China-like melody entered the hotel room, breaking through the silence to weave a feel of sensuality around the two.
Brian heard the thug when Justin dropped the object and the hand found the back of his head, pulling him down even more until their noses touched. Justin's long fingers combed through his short hair, ruffling it as they stared at each other, the feeling of love ringing forever through their eyes. "Please..." Justin whispered, tilting his head and slowly closing his eyes, drawing Brian's head closer until their lips met and Brian instinctively opened his mouth, kissing his husband with tender caresses. He breathed in sharply, the warmth of those lips eliciting shivers from his feet to his head. "Please baby," Justin repeated through a kiss. Brian felt Justin's tongue lick along the inside of his bottom lip and then it was licking the roof of his mouth. Brian's tongue met Justin's, forcing a moan to echo from Brian's mouth to Justin's.
Ya da da da, yeah yeah
La da da, ooh
Ah, ah, ah, ah
The energy I see
The silence that you speak
The lust within my dreams
And what it says to me
This full heart of mine
You just can't empty
So come lay with me
China love
How pleasent life will be
China love
As the sun retires
Our love will transpire
Make love to me
China love
Brian couldn't believe that Justin was sucking on his tongue. He couldn't believe that Justin was unbuttoning his shirt with one hand while unzipping his jeans with the other. When he felt Justin arch his back, he couldn't believe how wonderful it felt to feel that concealed erection brushing his own. He couldn't believe how sweet Justin's mouth tasted and just the feel of his own hand brushing down the zipper of Justin's jeans heated his body.
Brian struggled with the jeans tangled around his feet, but he continued to move his hands over his husband's body. He had already removed Justin's shirt and his hand was in Justins unzipped jeans, cupping Jusitn's balls through his boxer-briefs. "God..." Brian panted as Justin sucked on his neck. Brian pressed his body down on Justin's, arching his back slightly to feel that sweet erection bump against Justin's stomach. He ran a shaky hand over Justin's hair, his eyes batting open when he felt Justin kicking off both of their jeans. "Mmmm, baby, oh Lord... oh my... shit..." Brian moaned, his eyes squinting shut again as Justin jacked him off through his boxers. Suddenly, the stimulation had overtaken him. The unexpected sensations were swallowing him and all Brian could think of was sex and Justin and Justin and sex and the two together in a beautiful painting of passion.
Justin skimmed Brian's open shirt off of his shoulders and slid it down Brian's arms, feeling the rip muscles as his fingers moved. Justin was like water against Brian's skin, moving silkly with no intent of just falling away. He sucked on Brian's skin like it was oxygen, breathing in Brian's musk and his sweet cologne. Brian's erection was hard like an oyster, but Justin knew there was softness inside, a sweet pearl waiting to be captured by Justin. Brian was Justin's everything and Justin had no plans to let him move away.
I see the sunshine
When I look into your eyes
They speak of worlds gone by
We loved another time
My heart was empty
'Til you came to be
(Baby, come inside of me) So come lay with me
(China love) China love
(China love) How pleasent life will be
China love (China love)
As the sun retires
Our love will transpire
Make love to me
China love
"I.. I... oh, God, please..." Brian panted out, shivering with every movement of Justin's pelvis. He brushed his lips over Justin's briefly, his weakness leaving him unable to secure his lips to Justin's. He felt Justin leave a sweet kiss on the tip of his nose and that was enough for him. He tugged at Justin's nipples through Justin's wifebeater, laying his forehead against Justin's, trying to stare at Justin through half-open eyes. "Beanie... Bean..." Brian grunted, his lips falling open as Justin pressed his hands down on Brian's ass, pressing their erections together through thin material. "Baby, please..." Justin pleaded, tilting his head again. Brian fell into the kiss, his lips crushing against Justin's.
Brian could hear the song fading from the speakers and Justin pulling back. He caught his last few kisses from those sweet lips before letting Justin relax on the pillow. He relaxed on top of Justin, his eyes still half-open and his erection still throbbing against Justin's. "You really want me to go, huh?" Brian asked in a low voice. Justin crept his hand over Justin's back, massaging the tender flesh as he moved. "Yes baby." Justin replied in a husky voice. He sucked in his lower lip, his face a pillar of innocence.
Justin felt the coolness of Brian's wedding ring rub over his cheek as Brian pet him. He leaned his head into the touch, closing his eyes and smiling. "All right, I'll go JuJu." Brian whispered into Justin's ear before kissing it. He relaxed under Justin's smooth touch and listened to his breathing, hoping to find a small amount of rest in Justin's strong arms.
He thought he could get a little rest in his husband's arms. Maybe just sleep a little, dream a little. All he wanted was to relax in those strong arms, with that comforting hand sliding up and down the small of his back. He couldn't have that. Any of it. As soon as he was calm, relaxed, ready to fall asleep in those loving arms, the yelling came. The shouting came. The hateful words and argumental voice entered the hallway and it wakened him, wakened his husband and destroyed all of the peace they once had.
"Are they still at it?" Justin asked softly, brushing his hand over Brian's shoulderblade. Brian sighed, pressing his forehead to Justin's chest. 'Why? Why do they have to do this? Why right now when he's holding me and he wants to lay here with me and he's not even thinking about getting up for the Janet Jackson show or contacting Chris or JC?' Brian thought. He furrowed his brow as he felt Justin move under him, shifting to get up. He knew he'd have to get up too. He couldn't lay there without Justin. He wouldn't be able to sleep without him right there, holding him, kissing his forehead and whispering those adorable words of love and kindness into his ear. "Fuck." he muttered and he lifted his body from Justin's, scooted to the end of the bed and they both stood. They both walked to the door and Brian reluctantly opened it, letting the arguing echo into the room.
"I can't believe you'd act like that. Especially at a magazine photoshoot." Amanda barked at her husband, her fists gripped shut and her eyes squared. "I can't even believe I did that stupid shit. It's not like I care what they write in the article or what picture they use." AJ grumbled, feet from his wife, in the middle of the hotel hallway, with an exhausted and angered expression ruling his face. "Oh, that's right, because the article was more about me than you. Lord knows that we wouldn't want to put any attention on the little ol' housewife." Amanda said sarcastically. AJ threw his hands up, frustrated with the argument. How many times had he done this in a month? Almost two months? He couldn't count and he couldn't figure out why he never ended it. Why did he continue? They were separated and had yet to reconcile the marriage. 'Maybe that's it... maybe it's not meant to be.' he thought to himself, scratching the back of his neck while holding his head down.
With the eyes of the others on him, he knew he had to reply to her last remark but he feared what his words might do. "You can't be a housewife if we don't even stay in the same fucking house anymore Amanda. All you are now is a singer... not the Panda I married over a year ago." AJ hissed, dropping his hands to his side while peering at her.
That was enough. It was all he really had to say to cause Amanda to lose a want to argue, to be around AJ. She no longer had a reason to utter anything. She only had small, prickling tears developing in her eyes and that was enough. "I really wish Amaiya was here to hear what you say Alex. It's always good to know... that my husband doesn't even see me as his wife anymore." Amanda stuttered out, her voice choked by a sob as she spoke.
The silence continued in the hall as Amanda wiped her tears and walked away. The others stood in a deaf stillness as AJ looked around, his fists balled and his eyes squinted. He wanted to swear at all of them, curse them for being in the hallway to hear their words, but he didn't. He just walked away in the sopposite direction, probably headed to the bar, outside to smoke a cigarette, the nearest phone to call his mother. Anywhere but that hallway with eyes on him. Anyplace by under the scrutiny of the others.
JC scratched the back of his head, brushing his fingers through his thick hair. 'That could be me. I could be like that if I'm not careful. I could be married right now and maybe that's not where I'm supposed to be? Maybe Nick isn't meant to be Nick Chasez?' JC thought, sighing as he leaned in the doorway of Nick's room, watching the others slip back into their rooms. He licked his lips cautiously, opting to escape the thoughts and that dark room for just a few minutes.
His footsteps were light down the hallway, his bare feet brushing over the smooth carpeted floor. His blue eyes watched the floor, thinking of the steps he had taken, the roads he had walked. 'What more is there? What more isn't there?' he thought, still running his nimble fingers through his hair. There was more and he knew it. There was Nick, his husband, once his dream. There was Nikki his first love, his first anything when it came to his heart. Still, there was Justin, once his best friend, the only man to touch him in a way that was unforgettable. And Lance. There was always Lance. There was always that love that burned in his heart for Lance. The man that took his virginity, that showed him the rainbow in any sky. There was Lance, but who was worth more?
JC felt another body colide with his, the sudden impact catching him off balance. He stumbled back with confusion and his eyes immediately lifted to find out who he had bumped into. "I'm sor..." JC stopped mid-word. The word never finished. He stared into a pair of pastel blue eyes, ones that belonged to Brian Littrell. JC stood there, staring, for a moment. He wasn't going to apologize. In fact, he wasn't going to say much at all. There wasn't anything to say to the man that held Justin's heart.
JC glanced at Brian's attire, the open button-down shirt revealing Brian's chest and the boxers clinging loosely to Brian's legs. He could see the almost curly downy hairs on Brian's upper thigh, the boxers barely covering them. Brian was barefoot, his hair was slightly dishelved, while his right hand held a bucket of ice. Brian's left hand held a can of Sprite and JC knew it had to be for Justin. But JC's eyes lost focus of the can when seeing the glimmer of the light glistening off of Brian's gold wedding band.
It was beautiful and untainted, something JC's ring wasn't. It held meaning just like the love Brian held for Justin. JC knew all of that. He knew that it ran deeper than the outer expression. It was invading. It was a love that possed the whole body and left it unwilling to do anything but adore another person. JC despised it.
JC hated that Brian wouldn't say anything to him. No apology or greeting or even vile words. Brian just stood there, waiting. Was he trying to figure JC out? JC hoped not. He hoped that Brian would say something to provoke him. Anything to start an argument, to bring out the bad Brian, the Brian Justin didn't love you. Maybe the alcoholic Brian that haunted Justin sometimes. That's all JC wanted. Just something.
"Baby? What's taking you so long?" JC heard Justin's voice enter the atmosphere. He spied Justin walk near them and then lace his arms around Brian's neck, pulling him close. JC sighed, his brow wrinkling disturbingly. Justin was dressed only in a pair of midnight blue boxers and a tight wifebeater, all of his mucles revealed. JC despised Justin being that close to Brian, his arms around Brian's neck, his head resting against Brian's with Brian's hip pressed against Justin's crotch and Justin's right foot brushing over Brian's.
JC cleared his throat and took a step back. He felt Justin's questioning blue eyes on him. He offered a dimunitive smirk, a frown still pulling on his heart. "Oh, hey there Josh." Justin said, his voice dropping an octive.
JC nodded in his direction, slipping his hands into his vintage jeans. Where were his hopes now? His aspirations? His need to make Justin move away from Brian? "I'm not going to the MTV thing." JC muttered out, feeling foolish for only being able to speak those words. He watched Justin's eyebrows arch and send another questioning look toward him. "You're not?" Justin questioned. JC only shook his head, still plastering that counterfeit smile on his thick lips. He held back a sigh when watching Justin nimble his lower lip. He saw the brief worry cross Justin's face and he wanted to sink into the pain of his heart, that same echoing song calling him to step into the shadows.
"Okay, it's your choice." Justin finally said, letting his eyes return to Brian again. He ran a slow hand over Brian's hair, smiling at his husband's calmness. "Come on baby, let's go back to the room." Justin suggested. Brian nodded, his expression still the same, unchanged. "We'll catch you later Josh." Justin said quickly, hooking his arms around Brian's right arm and pulling him back toward their room. "Yeah..." JC whispered, nodding at them with a want to stop them and cry, reveal his feelings for the love he knew he needed. But he didn't and somewhere, he knew he couldn't.
Lips tasted, fingers felt, bodies caressed, and moans reverberated. Time passed like soft moving wind and they relaxed in the darkness, making out without worry or concern. JC trailed his fingers down Nick's exposed stomach, feeling the slight pudginess and then the muscle that rounded out Nick's tummy. He played with Nick's body like a piano, testing each key and trying to find the melody that would make Nick sing. He had the tune. It was love. He wanted to reach the surface and let passion enclose them in worlds they hadn't been in for months.
"Mmmm, baby, yes... oh God, please take off your pants." Nick whispered with a husky voice, his own fingers trailing down JC's naked back. JC knew to keep partially clothed. He didn't want this to lead to sex and then sleep and then sex again. He wanted to kiss Nick as long as he could kiss Nick and touch him without fucking him. Making love was something he missed and he needed to reach that field of pleasure again. "Just relax Nicky... let it happen." JC instructed, pushing down Nick's sweatpants with a careful hand. His response was a desperate, rolling groan that sent a shudder throughout his body.
The music carrying them higher into their passion controlled the speed of their touches. It was a haunting melody but too true to their situation. Nick was JC's lover and at times, Nick was all that JC wanted to think of. They fit together, whether in bed or in life, they carried the same torch for it.
I love you
I love you, I love you
Baby I love you, you are my life
My happiest moments weren't complete if you weren't by my side
You're my relation and connection to the sun
With you next to me, there's no darkness I can't overcome
You are my raindrops, I am the seed
With you and God, Who's my sunlight
I'm blooming, grown so beautifully
Baby I'm so proud, proud to be your girl
You make the confusion go all away from this cold and misty world
JC's lips tasted the skin of Nick's lower neck, dribbling toward Nick's collarbone. He felt Nick shift a knee and press it against his crotch, rubbing roughly to entice even louder moans from JC's lips. "Fuck, mmm, don't stop doing that..." JC grunted, gripping at Nick's shoulders. He panted hard, his breath bathing Nick's chin with heat. "Let me see it... please, let me see your dick..." Nick pleaded, his fingertips slipping into the back of JC's jeans, brushing against the top of JC's curved ass. "Kiss me first..." JC requested, his eyes flickering open to look up at Nick. He watched Nick dip his head and soon he felt those succulent red lips pressing against his.
I am in love with you (In love)
You set me free
I can't do this thing called life without you here with me
Cause I'm dangerously in love with you (In love)
I'll never leave
Just, just keep loving me
The way I love you loving me
Cause I am in love with you (In love)
You set me free
I can't do this thing called life without you here with me
Cause I'm dangerously in love with you (In love)
I'll never leave
Just keep loving me
The way I love you loving me
JC panted even harder as Nick pulled back from the kiss, falling back against the mattress with a thud. "God, tell me you love being with me... please say you love being my husband..." Nick pleaded. JC could hear tears in Nick's voice. He strung his fingers through Nick's hair before kissing Nick's neck. "Nicky, I love you. Sweetie, I know it's been hard, for both of us, but being your husband has meant a lot to me. Knowing that you're Nickolas Gene Chasez makes me smile." JC replied, trailing kisses up Nick's neck.
Nick sniffled quietly, blinking back tears as JC began to kiss on his lips. "You don't want to leave me, do you?" Nick asked, rubbing the small of JC's back. "Leave you?" JC wondered, pecking Nick's cheek. Nick nodded, grinding his body to JC's in hopes of keeping JC aroused. "I mean, if I did something stupid, something that hurt you... please say you don't want to leave me." Nick begged, closing his eyes before JC could see bitter tears. He felt JC kiss his forehead and brush his sweaty hair back. "I don't. I've been hurt by plenty of people babe. You're my husband though and we have to learn to work things out." JC told him, rubbing his thumb over Nick's cheek. Nick batted his eyes open again and smiled toward JC, loving what he heard and believing in what he saw.
And I know you love me, love me for who I am
Cause years before I became who I am
Baby you were my man
No, it ain't easy, easy loving me
But I appreciate the love and dedication from you to me
"You do believe in us, right Nicky?" JC inquired, dragging his lips over Nick's chin. Nick moaned quietly, his body shaking as JC's touches became more aggressive. "Yes, oh yes baby." Nick groaned, tilting his head back. "You're my baby Nick." JC whispered, palming Nick's swollen cock through his briefs. Nick chewed his lower lip and sighed, listening to every word with faith. Maybe he could survive? He didn't need to accept this depression. He knew that JC wouldn't have been with him this long if the marriage wasn't meant to last. Even if he did say the words, tell JC the truth, let him know what really happened, he felt that deep inside JC would accept it, stay with him. It couldn't be that bad because if JC loved him, he'd stay.
Every time I see your face, my heart smiles
Every time it feels so good, it hurts sometimes
Created in this world to love
To hold, to feel, to breathe
To live you
Dangerously in love
I am in love with you (In love)
You set me free
I can't do this thing called life without you here with me
Cause I'm dangerously in love with you (In love)
I'll never leave
Just, just keep loving me
The way I love you loving me
"Okay, so we're like rolling in different limos, right?" Christina asked, looking at the others with question. Her deeper-than-blue eyes glanced at her boyfriend Jorge and then Britney, then Chris and then Brian and then Justin. They all nodded, glancing around the lobby as they got a few eyes from guests at the hotel. "We can't let the world know we actually hang out together." Britney joked, pushing pieces of her hair back. "Yeah, it's bad enough I have to be seen hanging out with Brian and Justin, but Pop's two blonde sex-pots too? Oh, that would be bad." Chris teased, a serious expression pressed into his face while humor lingered in his eyes. Christina and Britney both twisted their heads while firmly pressing their hands on their hips. They pursed their lips and rolled their eyes immediately as Justin, Brian and Jorge laughed at Chris' comment. "Any-fucking-ever." Britney grumbled with her slick country accent.
"Now this is where I draw the line." Christina hissed out, her face tightening up with a sour expression. The laughter began to die down and eyes flocked to Christina. "Okay, geez, I'm sorry. I was just kidding." Chris sighed out, leaning against the wall with a meek expression. "Not you Chris." Christina mumured, crossing her arms below her chest. She felt her boyfriend's soft hands on her shoulders, rubbing them in a tender manner. "What's wrong Chrissy?" Jorge asked as his girlfriend stayed stiff under his touch. Christina shook her head, the anger raging through her eyes directed at one person. "Britney." she hissed through gritted teeth. It was evident that a secret was alive between Britney and Christina, one that left Christina angry and kept her staring at something.
Britney cleared her throat quietly, turning slightly, trying to keep her eyes away from the scene that Christina stared at. "I don't really think it's our business Chrissy." Britney said, her voice lowered to keep the secrecy alive. Chris glanced at Christina and then Britney, his face bleek and confused. "I think it is our business when Brian's coniving, dirty-handed, bitch of an ex-girlfriend is standing over there talking with Nick and Kevin and it looks to me as if it's about something serious." Christina grumbled loud enough for the others to hear and their eyes automatically fell to where Christina looked.
In a corner of the lobby sat Leighanne, Kevin, and Nick. Nick held his chin in his hands, a depressed and stressed look on his face while Kevin and Leighanne 'talked' to him. Kevin's hand rested on Nick's shoulder, rubbing it, trying to coach him into something while Leighanne's expression screamed control.
"What the..." Brian's mouth was quickly covered by Justin's hand, his husband pulling him back into a controlling embrace. "Trust me Brian, we're all thinking the same thing." Chris said calmly, crossing his arms and peering at the three. "She's plotting something, I just know it." Christina murmured, still stiff and lifeless under Jorge's touch. "Doesn't matter because she's talking to Nick. It could only have to do with his marriage to JC." Britney insisted, adjusting her purse on her shoulder. She didn't bother to look at the three. She stared at Justin, the way he held Brian in his arms, kissed the back of his head and kept him silent and calm. She sighed, ducking her head, wishing it was that easy for her. "That's what you think Britney. You forget that Nick was in love with me or that Nick still wants revenge against Justin or that Nick is connected to more than just JC. And my cousin's there too. He doesn't give a shit about JC." Brian reminded her, his voice strickened with animosity. "Girl, I've worked with this bitch. She's evil through and through. She's up to something." Christina said, her eyes never straying.
Justin exhaled lightly, rubbing a hand over the small of Brian's back. "I'm with Britney on this one. Let's just forget it. They're only going to ruin our night if we focus on them." Justin advised, giving Brian a small nudge toward the exit. "Yeah, there's no use in us trying to figure out what they're up to until they try something." Jorge agreed, pulling Christina away. Christina sighed dramatically, following her boyfriend and security toward their awaiting limos. "Who cares anyway? If you can stick Justin and Nick in a bed butt-ass naked and still have Brian head-over-heels in love with Justin, there ain't nothing those three can do." Chris joked, following Christina and Jorge out with Britney close behind.
"Are you worried?" Justin whispered into Brian's ear, letting the others walk ahead as Brian and Justin stayed still. Brian sighed softly, laying his head back on Justin's shoulder. "I have two very important people back in Orlando. I can't afford for them to mess things up for me." Brian responded, his country voice lowered. Justin kissed Brian's earlobe, slowly rubbing Brian's back for comfort. "Baby, you believe in us. You know that I don't want to take this ring off of my finger. Let's just trust in God and hope for the best." Justin suggested.
Brian wanted to fight Justin's optomism. He was looking for a reason to walk around grim, depressed. Justin wouldn't let him. Justin would not give him a reason to forget about how happy he was with his husband and with his family. Justin was... Justin was Justin. Justin was Brian's angel and he always wrapped his wings around Brian, holding him close and reminding him that life wasn't as hard as he thought. "I love you Justin Randall Littrell." Brian whispered, turning his head to give Justin a small peck on the cheek. Justin smiled widely, nudging Brian toward the exit again. "Love you too Rocky." he replied softly before leading Brian out of the lobby.
He had watched Christina do her opening, Outkast and Destiny's Child perform brilliantly in their own respects and had even watched his husband and the rest of *NSYNC give a video montage toward the woman of the night. With Britney wedged between Chris and Justin, Brian felt a little out of place, sitting next to Justin, out of view and shadowed from attention.
Brian had found himself giving Janet Jackson a few glances, amazed by her beauty, her humbleness and her glow. He knew when Janet glanced at him, gave him a quick smile or a wink, it was because she accepted him. She did not judge him or belittle him for going against the rule book. She did not have ill-feelings toward Brian for being with Justin or Justin for being with Brian. She accepted them for who they were in their souls and Brian only wished the rest of the world, the rest of the industry accepted them for that.
On stage, P!nk had just finished up a rousing dance performance of Janet's 'Miss You Much' and Usher was mid-way through his sloppy rendition the song 'Alright.' Brian didn't care because it was just dancing, dancing that could have been done a little more tighter, a little faster and with a little more ease. He listened to Chris and Britney babble about the performance and felt Justin's still hand on his thigh. He wanted Justin to massage his thigh, maybe go a little higher or even rub it comfortingly like he did when they were in bed together. Occasionally he got up the nerve to glance at Justin, watch his husband watch the performance. He smiled when watching that tight jaw muscle flex and Justin's eyes peer with deep concentration. He resisted needs to pet that cheek for fear of being caught by the camera that circled the audience. 'How would the world react if they saw me rubbing his face while he watched this stupid ass Usher performance?' Brian laughed to himself, shifting his eyes to look at his lap again. Justin's hand was still stiff, but it looked caring. 'Who cares? They saw us kiss for a minute at the MTV Awards and I'm sure after that too. This is just another MTV event where the press will see Brian Littrell showing his care for his husband.' Brian told himself, a soft smile establish itself on his tin lips.
"Oh wow, look at Myà. She looks just like Janet." Britney gushed, causing Brian to lift his head. He glanced at the singer curiously and could see the slight resemblance between the two. He bobbed his head nonchalantly to the beat of 'Pleasure Principal.'
The hand on his leg was moving, caressing him in a loving way. He turned his head and his eyes found Justin's staring at me, a grin on his lips that sent butterflies swimming into Brian's stomach. "You look so cute when you're thinking hard." Justin said, his voice rising just above the sound of the music. Brian felt the blush creep into his cheeks and he felt like he was twenty-three years old again, falling for a seventeen-year-old without much control. He reached his hand up and tapped his knucle on Justin's nose. He let his fingers brush down and run over Justin's pouty red lips. "You're adorable whenever you're just you." Brian responded, a warming smile on his face. Justin winked at Brian and laughed lowly, leaning toward Brian. "Thanks," Justin whispered, his hand slipping a little higher up Brian's thigh. Brian shook, trying to hide his nervousness as Justin leaned closer. 'Damn, I've got to have sex with him tonight. He's just too damn sexy to ignore.' Brian told himself, letting his own hand stray to Justin's shirt, playing with the material as Justin got a little closer.
"If you kissed me right now, you'd be even more cuter." Justin said, his voice low but slick with lust. Brian watched the slow roll of Justin's long tongue over his lips, the wet the salivia left them slick and moist and ready to be kissed. They were ruddy, they were pouty and they were beautiful. The tongue slipped back into Justin's mouth but not without flicking toward Brian in a dangerously flirty way.
"If you kiss him, right now, I will personally kick both of your asses for making out on national TV." Chris warned, his voice stern but light with humor. Justin giggled softly, unconciously licking his lips again as he gradually pulled back from Brian. Brian caught his breath, closing his eyes. He concentrated on trying to calm the throbbing erection that now strained against his pants. "Sorry, couldn't help it." Justin said, settling back into his seat. Brian sighed, forcing out a smile as Justin's hand stayed steady on his leg, unmoving but still hot with need. "That's cute." Britney remarked, snuggling closer to Chris and Justin while Brian focused his attention on the stage. "Yeah... I bet." Brian whispered, scrunching up his nose with a song of need in his head.
"Hey, this is Jon Norris with MTV News and I'm standing here with two of the luckiest guys of the night. These are the two guys that actually got to hug Miss Janet Jackson tonight at the MTV special, Icon." Jon stated, dividing his time between the camera's lense and Chris and Justin. "Yeah, we got to hug her." Justin added with a sly grin. "You guys are pretty lucky. Now, besides you guys being out here for the show, you're also getting ready to release your third album, isn't that correct?" Jon asked, holding his microphone toward the guys. Chris and Justin both nodded immediately, their serious expressions ruling their faces. "Yeah, we pushed it back to the end of May to record just one more song and also make sure that the sing has enough time to pump people up for the new album." Chris replied, folding his arms. "Exactly. We want the first song, which is called 'Dirty Pop,' to hit big before we hit them with the album." Justin agreed.
"And from what I've heard of this new single, it is surely going to put you guys right back on the map. Now, you've worked with some intresting producers and writers from BT to Rodney Jerkins to Max Martin and company, but I hear you write and produce a majority of this album yourselves. Also, you worked with Brian Littrell from the Backstreet Boys again. What's the connection outside of personal matters?" Jon wondered, his professional demeanor standing strong. "We wanted to prove to everyone that we're not just this fluff act. We wanted to show everyone we can write decent songs. You know, JC did a lot of writing, Justin co-wrote and co-produced the first single. He co-wrote the song with Brian. Lance did a song for the album. Me and Joey did some writing here and there. It was all about showing everyone we are more than just a teen act or a musical group on TV. We have a niche for this craft." Chris explained, his grave image holding presedence. "We just love what we do." Justin said shortly.
"What about having Brian work on th album?" Jon wondered, daring to delve into the personal territory. Justin sucked in his lower lip and lowered his brow. He didn't want to discuss Brian because it was his Brian, not MTV's or the public's. "Brian's a cool guy, I guess. Sucks at producing and writing stuff, but we pretend he's cool because of Justin." Chris joked, elbowing his friend. Jon and Justin both laughed, Chris' humor finally winning its way back. "No, but really, all of the guys love him. He's a very cool guy and he writes awesome stuff. Justin had originally written the song with Brian in mind and then the two callborated and got with producer Veit Renn to finish it all up. When we sang it and heard it, it was real cool. It was pure emotion, for all of us, on that song." Chris explained kindly.
Justin felt a smile pull at the corners of his mouth and he did not fight it. It was true. Justin had written a majority of the song while thinking of his husband. He had felt the emotion when they sung it and even felt the tears prick at his eyes when he hit that note. He blinked back his emotion when Jon spoke to him. "I noticed Brian's the only Backstreet Boy here tonight and that he's here with you. How is he?" Jon asked, keeping the interview personal for a moment. Justin scratched his buzz cut hair, nibbling on his lower lip again. "He's good. He's here, somewhere, mingling with folks. But he's good. The other guys are in town also for their L.A. concert, but they're resting up for it," Justin explained considerately. Jon nodded, taking in the information with a straight face. "I kind of suckered Brian into coming with me instead of getting rest." Justin added with a quick laugh.
Jon smiled gently, pulling his microphone back for his next question. "And how is your son? Well, I should said, how are both of your sons?" Jon asked, turning his question to both men. "Great. I got to see him today because he's out here in Los Angeles with his mother while she works with 702 to finish up their new album. So he was thrilled to see me." Chris responded with a luxurious smirk. Jon grinned back before glancing at Justin. "And how's Angel, Justin?" he questioned, focring the mic in Justin's direction. Justin licked his lips quickly, trying to swallow back his distaste toward the question. "He's fine. He's back at home waiting for me to get back." Justin replied halfheartedly. He had no desire to publically admit how much he missed his son or wished for him to be laying sleep in his fathers' arms tonight. He kept it short to save his own heart the pain of discussing what he wanted as bad as he wanted to be with Brian.
"And the other guys? Are they back in Orlando finishing up the album?" Jon inquired, hoping tow rap up his interview. "Actually, Lance and Joey are in Canada finishing up a few final scenes for Lance's movie. They had to redo some of them." Justin answered first, relieved with a less private question. "And JC... he's sick. He's just a bit under the weather and had planned on coming tonight but just couldn't." Chris lied flatly. Justin glared at him, disgusting by the way Chris covered for JC. Justin wanted to say JC passed up the event for a previous engagment, one that consumed him and gave him no room to breathe. Chris wasn't going to let him do it. Chris didn't have to courage to admit his friend was being swallowed alive by Nick's neediness. Justin hated that. He hated everything about it.
"Well, thanks guys. We hope to hear from you real soon, especially with the new album." Jon said, concluding his interview with a smile. Both Chris and Justin nodded and smiled for him, shifting in their own direction. Justin crossed his arms, walking laboriously next to Chris. Chris gave him a fleeting look, sighing loudly. "Don't Justin." he said sternly, his words having instant meaning. "Fine Chris. Let's not really give a fuck that we're covering for him to do whatever with Nick." Justin replied grimly. Chris shook his head immediately. "He's going through a tough time right now. He just wants his marriage to work." Chris said, defending his friend without question. "Is that what he wants?" Justin questioned sarcastically.
He didn't believe that. He didn't believe JC wanted anything to work but his penis. But that was once his best friend. Once his brief lover. Now - just JC.
He thought maybe it was serendipity. Laying in that bed again, with Nick's head on his chest, tears soaking his shirt from Nick's eyes, he thought that maybe he was meant to be there to comfort Nick. There was no way Nick could've done this alone, but would he even have tried? Would he just swallow the pain, let it undulate through his soul and leave him bitter like fresh wine? Just possibly and JC hated that. He despised that his husband would let this pungent, unhealthy feeling incinerate the goodness that made JC want to marry him.
JC brushed his thumb along Nick's cheek, rubbing against salty tears without thought. "If you keep crying baby, then you'll get those real puffy eyes and it just doesn't make you look cute. How am I gonna kiss you if you're not cute like you always are?" JC asked, longing for a happier side to his husband's disposition. Nick continued to sniffle, shameful tears staining his soft cheeks. "You'll won't want to kiss me later. You won't want to kiss me if you knew." Nick choked out, gripping JC's shirt tighter.
JC sighed, tired of trying to decypher Nick's cryptic words. They didn't mean anything to him anymore. What Nick knew, what scared Nick, what was hurting Nick didn't matter anymore. He just wanted to enjoy being around Nick and it wasn't possible. "It doesn't matter honey. I'm here with you now and whatever is bothering you can't take me away." JC said, combing his fingers through Nick's hair. He leaned down and kissed the top of Nick's head, snuggling a little closer to Nick.
Nick wished it was that easy. He wished he could let down his guard and remove his armour. He couldn't. He knew if he did, he would be vulnerable.
He'd be an easy target for more pain, savage pain. It wasn't worth. He'd rather his conscience die than to let his heart die. But weren't they one in the same?
"It could, Josh. It could take you away." Nick sniffled out. He felt JC's hand on his chin, cupping it and lifting it. He looked through tear-soaked eyes. He blinked away those tears to stare into JC's gentle and oh so loving eyes. It was a blessing. To look into those crystal-like eyes and felt comfort sweep around his body, hug him and pet him until he felt at ease. "Hey, aren't I Joshua Chasez? Aren't you Nick Chasez? Aren't we married? Don't we love each other?" JC questioned. Nick sniffled before nodding. They were married and in love. He always wanted to believe that. "I know, in the past, I haven't exactly shown you how much you've meant to me and how much I've needed you, but I can't let that happen anymore. You mean far too much to me. It's no lie, Nick. I didn't stay in this marriage to lose you or lose myself." JC told him, his voice heavy with emotion.
There it was. There was the smile that lifted JC's spirits. There was that honest look of love that JC fell in love with that night they had sex. That night JC made love to him, JC remembered that look of tenderness and slight fear that came along with a new love. It was that glow in Nick's eyes that brought the fire to JC's heart. He could remember it all, the feelings during sex, the emotion afterward, the thoughts in his mind, the gentle kissing, the way he didn't want to let Nick go. And the next morning? He could remember it. He could remember waking up to somebody and truly feeling complete. So why couldn't he have that again? Why couldn't he start all over with this man? It was worth it. It was worth waking up to that loving smile and those bright eyes every morning without thinking about the passionate sex or the previous argument or the way the alcohol still burned in his throat. It was worth being there to know Nick Chasez instead of Nick Carter.
Day to night, when you dream
Heaven watches you as you sleep
Close your eyes, don't be scared
Cause we'll always be right there
When you wake, look around
You'll find us looking down
Smiling as we watch you
Hoping all your dreams came true
Don't be afraid, close your eyes
Angels are around you, it's all right
So, baby, don't ever worry about losing your dreams
Cause they'll come true
Just look at your Daddy and me...
Justin clutched a pillow to his chest, watching Brian sing to his son through the phone. He rested his head against the headboard of Brian's bed, sighing quietly. He would feel like Angel in less than twenty-four hours. He would be missing Brian desperately again and it hurt to think of it. He would be far away from Brian once more and it may have only been for a week, but Justin knew that week would be hell. It was going to hurt him too much to be away from Brian if only for a short period of time.
"Goodnight Timber." Brian whispered into the phone before hanging it up. He smiled sweetly, the sound of his son's steady breathing still in his head. "He's knocked out." Brian chimed, turning on the bed to face Justin. His brow furrowed as his eyes glared at Justin. The way Justin's lips pouted, the swollen tears hiding in his eyes as he ducked his head, and the way his body was beginning to curl up bothered Brian. Brian scooted back on the bed, placing a hand on Justin's bare shin. "Hey, you okay?" Brian asked with heavy concern, rubbing his finger across the downy hairs on Justin's legs. Justin nodded, keeping his head low and his chin to the pillow. "You don't have to lie." Brian said lowly, moving his hands higher to rest on Justin's thigh.
It was always hard for Justin to lie to Brian. Sometimes he could get away with it, a small, white lie, but never anything big or anything emotional. He couldn't conceal himself from Brian. Brian knew him too well. Brian knew all of his facial expressions, all of his body movements. It was just too hard for Justin to try and hide his depression from Brian because Brian knew Justin from the exterior to his soul.
"It's nothing Brian. Just a little down about going home tomorrow and having to wait for you to be there with me and Bastian." Justin replied in a small voice, his fingers picking at the seam of the pillowcase. He felt the bed shift as Brian crawled further up the bed, Brian's side leaning on Justin's leg as Brian pulled his legs up onto the bed. Brian pulled at his pillow, pulling it down into his lap. "Hurts right there, doesn't it?" Brian asked, pressing his index finger into Justin's bare chest. Justin glanced down, looking at Brian's finger as it pressed right against Justin's heart. He sighed loudly while nodding again. 'Since when did I forget what my vocabulary is?' Justin wondered, not able to utter any words to his husband. "It always hurts right there when it means the most. It's supposed to hurt. It's supposed to make you cry. If it doesn't, then what's the purpose of caring about that person so much? What's the purpose of loving them with all of your heart if they can't make it hurt really bad when they're away?" Brian said, his words speaking poetry to Justin's soul.
Brian scooted up the bed until he was curled right next to Justin. He reached to his side and pulled open the nearby desk drawer. He shifted through the drawer for a moment before pulling out a few photographs. Justin nibbled his lower lip while drapping an arm over Brian's chest. He scooted closer to glance at the pictures as Brian held them up. "I guess you could call these my sedative. They numb the pain sometimes when I get really down out here on the road." Brian said with his soft, honey-thick country accent. Justin peered at the pictures with wonder as Brian shifted through them. First was a color Kodak of Brian and Justin dancing the night of their anniversary. Following that one was a picture of Justin cuddled up to BJ on the couch. Next was a black and white photo of Brian, Justin, and Angel laughing on the floor, one that Justin knew Lance took before the Littrells left for Kentucky in December. Justin smiled at a photo of Brian reading Angel a book in Angel's rocking chair. His eyes sparkled when he saw a picture of both Justin and Angel kissing Brian's cheek on Brian's birthday. The final was a picture of the infant child that Brian and Justin hoped to adopt. Justin sighed breathlessly when glaring at the photo of the premature girl laying in her crib at the hospital. 'He wants you so bad.' Justin thought to himself as he unconsciously ran a finger over the picture.
He closed his eyes tightly, hoping tears did not squeak through. 'I want you so bad, but we might not get you. We might not be what the hospital is looking for.' Justin sighed to himself, laying his head on Justin's shoulder.
"It helps me feel better when I think about Angel or our future daughter or Tyke, BJ and the pups or you. I know I'll be back with ya'll soon and it makes me feel better. We all need something to remind us that it's supposed to hurt but it gets better." Brian said, snaking an arm around Justin's shoulders. Justin smiled softly. He turned his head a little to brush his growing goatee against Brian's soft skin. "Talking on the phone with you makes me feel better about you being away." Justin whispered, placing a gentle kiss on Brian's collarbone. "Does it?" Brian asked, rubbing his thumb over Justin's bicep. "Hmmmhmmm." Justin moaned, lifting his leg and resting it over Brian's lap. Brian laid the photos on the table and curled his arms around Justin, pulling him close. "It's your voice. It's never tough or hard, but always sweet and sometimes so soft," Justin smiled. He traced Brian's smooth abs with his fingertips, enjoying the feel of the skin. "And then I can look at my wedding ring and remember July 4th. I start to think of the beach and walking down the aisle and standing in the sand, barefoot as we recited our vows. No one can ever recreate that moment baby." Justin added, twisting his fingers through Brian's short hair.
Brian shifted his body, rolling Justin onto his side. He chewed his lower lip as Justin batted his long lashes at Brian, rolling his tongue over his lips in a lusty manner. Justin was Brian's private sex kitten. He only revealed this sweet, youthful, sexy side to Brian. Brian knew no one else ever saw it. No one. No one ever heard Justin purr when Brian touched him in the right spot like Brian heard when he cupped Justin's crotch through Justin's thin boxers. No one saw that glittery gleam in Justin's eyes like Brian did when Brian ran his foot up and down Justin's leg. Only Brian was able to smell that masculine scent as he began to slid down Justin's boxers.
He was the only person who taste Justin's sugary lips without having to ask or seduce his husband. He received the honey delicious taste by just being Brian. That made him special. That made Justin his sex kitten.
Justin skimmed his leg between Brian's and let his knee raise until it bumped against Brian's covered crotch. He rubbed his knee back and forth across Brian's balls and then over his swollen erection. "So is this going to make me feel better for a few days?" Justin wondered with a seductive voice, rubbing his thumb over Brian's bottom lip. Brian groaned lowly, forcing his own body down onto Justin's knee for more friction. "No, this is just going to be a reminder. I want to leave you with a little something to remind you that when I get home, we're sending Angel back over to your mother's, giving Lea the day off and fucking all over the house for hours." Brian responded through gritted teeth, a loose smile forming afterward. Justin giggled quietly, sliding his hand down until it reached the waistband of Brian's boxers. He shifted closer to Brian, his lengthy erection brushing against the cloth of Brian's boxers. "Now ain't that a concept?" Justin grinned, his hand quickly clicking on the stereo while his other hand pulled down Brian's boxers.
That's it...
Would you mind?
Would you?
Justin laid a quick kiss on Brian's smooth pink lips while his hand moved lightly over Brian's penis. "Do I need to get a condom because there's one in the back pocket of my jeans?" Justin wondered as Brian massaged his hips.
Brian ducked his head and placed quick, gentle kisses across Justin's neck. He carefully grinded his dick into Justin's palm, restraining moans by keeping his lips in contact with Justin's skin. His eyes fluttered upward with the movement of his lips. He kissed Justin's chin, licking his tongue against the bristles of hair on Justin's chin. His lips brushed over Justin's face like rose petals circling in the air. He finally found Justin's lips and panted warm breath on them, his hands skirting up to Justin's chest. He painted erotic planes over Justin's chest, feeling the muscles flex slightly. "No, don't get it. Let's just touch, feel, smell, taste, kiss, suck... anything. We don't need to make love or go down on each other... just feel what we want and let the rest cum naturally." Brian said, his country-tinged accent reverting into a dangerously seductive voice.
Justin moaned loudly, arching his back freely at the sound of Brian's voice. Brian hadn't been that sensual in awhile. Justin was not used to Brian's erotic tone but he welcomed it. He let his hands settle onto Brian's thighs, rubbing them softly as Brian's own hands slid down to a prize that both wanted.
Baby, would you mind touching me
Ever so slowly
Ooh, you're making me quiver
And baby, would you mind undressing me
Making me feel sexy
While in the moment
Cause I'm gonna
Bathe you, play with you, rub you, caress you
Tell you how much I've missed you
I just wanna
Touch you, tease you, lick you, please you
Love you, hold you, make love to you
And I'm gonna
Kiss you, suck you, taste you, ride you
Feel you deep inside me, ooh
I just wanna kiss you, suck you, taste you, ride you
Feel you, make you come too
(I wanna make you come)
Brian's tongue ran over his lips slowly, his blue eyes focused on Justin's lofty penis. He scooted closer until the head of Justin's cock brushed against the muscles in his stomach. He hissed quietly, his lips latching onto Justin's, swallowing them gradually as his baby-soft hands grabbed onto Justin's penis, rubbing it in a circular motion. His tongue flicked over Justin's teeth while his feet rubbed over Justin's. He felt his husband arch into his hands, desperate for rougher touches. Brian grinned in the kiss, pulling back slowly. He ran his tongue over Justin's slightly parted lips. "Mmmmm, yes..." Brian moaned out, rubbing the tip of his tongue over Justin's bottom lip. He suckled the red lip, tasting it without reservation. He nipped at it and sucked at it, beliving he would draw blood if he did not pull away.
"Ah, ah..." Justin gasped out as Brian ran the thumb of his left hand over the slit on Justin's penis. Justin let his eyes roll to the back of his head as he dwelled in the pleasure. His shaky hands brushed up and down Brian's inner thighs, hoping to trigger a similiar reaction from his husband. "Oooh, yes, yes JuJu..." Brian groaned softly, kissing Justin's lips once more. Justin hummed into the kiss, finally taking Brian's tongue into his mouth. He slithered a hand up higher, brushing his palm over Brian's balls while his fingers curled into Brian's underside. He pressed lightly onto Brian's ballsac, feeling the tightness of the skin. 'Mmmm, he's horny. They're pulled up tight.' Justin thought as he rolled his palm over the area. "God, do that some more..." Brian grunted as he pulled away from the kiss. Justin tilted his head with a smile. He moved closer and began to smell Brian's skin, the smell of musk and faint traces of cologne attracted him even greater. His lips kissed at Brian's Adam's apple while his other hand began to comb through Brian's curly pubic hair.
Brian began to nudge his generously proportioned penis against Justin's inner thigh, desperate to get Justin's hands on him. He felt Justin's hand creep lower under him, Justin's middle finger sliding between Brian's round, firm cheeks. He gasped roughly as Justin prodded at the hole with his finger with hopes of exciting Brian even more. "You're killing me babe." Brian huffed out, a gentle smile lacing his lips. He found Justin's vigorous blue eyes without trying. They sparkled with that risky glow that Justin rarely carried. He let his eyes slowly shut as he saw Justin draw closer to kiss him and he accepted it willingly.
The kiss was like the first glass of wine, awakening at first, but gradually purifying in a sensual way. Tongues met halfway and stirred the flavor, gave it new life as pants grw thicker. Brian lifted a hand from Justin's dick to rub it over Justin's prickly hair. He gripped the back of Justin's head, pulling him closer to further the kiss. Justin did not hesitate, he did not drawback when Brian's tongue snaked past his and began to caress the roof of his mouth. He welcomed it. His hand gained the courage to wrap around Brian's manhood and with a few strokes, Justin had Brian ready to give his soul for pleasure.
Baby, would you mind kissing me
All over my body
You missed a spot there
Baby, would you mind tasting me
It's making me all juicy
Feeling your lips on mine
Justin's lips strayed from Brian's, finding his shoulder. He kissed the skin, following a path down Brian's arm as Brian moaned carelessly into the dim-lit room. Brian wanted to be one with his husband. He wanted to feel the same undescribable ecstasy that Justin felt. He moved his ass backward, letting Justin's fingertip penetrate him. "Uh, oh God, uh..." Brian grunted, stepping into that forbidden paradise of sexual desire and awakening. He felt Justin leaving candy-coated kisses across his wrist, lifting it to suckle the skin, licking the veins and tracing pictures across his palm. "Hmmm." he moaned softly as Justin pulled the fingertip out of him, drawing a small path up his back.
Justin licked across Brian's palm, his fingers, the tips, the nails, and the knucles. He coated Brian's hand in his saliva and kisses. "Mmmm, you taste so good baby." Justin moaned, kissing each of Brian's fingertips. Brian sighed contently, rubbing his hand back and forth over Justin's throbbing cock. "You feel so good Ju... so long and so hard." Brian groaned, batting his eyes open to watch Justin. The images were blinding. The way Justin dragged that tongue across Brian's hand, slowly and desireably, left Brian weak. His vision was blurry and the hand curling around his cock wasn't helping.
"Use this hand to jack me off baby..." Justin breathed out, lowering Brian's now wet hand until it reached Justin's crotch. Brian quickly replaced his other hand with the one Justin instructed him to use. He whimpered lowly as Justin used his middle finger to pet the head of Brian's cock, massaging the precum into the velvety skin.
Justin carried Brian's other hand up to his lips, taking each finger into his mouth, one at a time. He suckled them like he would Brian's penis, never missing a spot. "God, baby..." Brian moaned, his toes curling at the sensations of Justin's tongue, his hand, his penis. His body quivered and his mind spun. He raked his toes over Justin's calf, tilting his head to kiss at Justin's jawline. His lips felt the movements in Justin's jaw as Justin sucked his fingers. "Oh baby, yeah, mmmmm..." Brian whispered, his tongue licking over Justin's earlobe.
Justin stopped licking Brian's fingers, panting lowly as he stared at Brian. "Use this hand to feel inside me." Justin whispered as he guided Brian's hand behind him. He didn't have to instruct Brian any further. He didn't have to tell Brian where to put his hand or what to do with it.
Before Justin could take another swallow to gain his strength, Brian had a finger sliding inside of him. Justin tensed up for a moment, striving to adjust to the feeling of Brian penetrating him once again. He grit his teeth together and shut his eyes, laying his forehead against Brian's. He felt Brian's shallow breaths and soft strokes. Brian wouldn't go any further with his other hand. He wouldn't slide deeper into Justin until he knew it was fine. "Uh, okay... okay baby, go ahead." Justin grunted out, his muscles finally relaxing and accepting Brian into his body. He gave himself to Brian and reveled in the bliss his husband brought to him as the music shaped their actions.
Cause I'm gonna
Bathe you, play with you, rub you, caress you
Tell you how much I've missed you
I just wanna
Touch you, tease you, lick you, please you
Love you, hold you, make love to you
And I'm gonna
Kiss you, suck you, taste you, ride you
Feel you deep inside me, ooh
I just wanna kiss you, suck you, taste you, ride you
Feel you, make you come too
(Are you ready?)
Justin sucked on Brian's lower lip as they passion persisted. He used a hand to hold Brian's leg up on his hip while his own hips ground into both of Brian's hands. The feel of Brian's index and middle finger rubbing over his prostate surrounded him. He was swallowed by a bubble of lust and passion, his breaths heavy and his body shuddering. He scrunched up his nose as the feverish friction of Brian's skin on his heated their bodies.
"Need it... I want it... God, please..." Brian pleaded in short breaths as Justin brushed the slit apart with his thumb. He felt a chill as Justin released his cock, carrying his hand away. His baby blue eyes batted open and he watched Justin. His eyes grew larger as he watched Justin suck on his own thumb, licking every inch of it with closed eyes. "Mmm, you taste like honey Rocky..." Justin groaned, his eyes finally opening. "Oh." Brian groaned back, poking his cock into Justin's hips.
Justin slid both of his hands around to Brian's ass. He cupped the cheeks and massaged them roughly as he pulled Brian even closer. His bruised lips found Brian's chest and he quickly began to kiss it. He used his head to cock Brian's head backward, giving him greater access to Brian's biceps. He pulled Brian forward until he felt Brian's cock slide between his legs. He squeezed his thighs shut, gripping Brian's aching penis between them and began his grinding once more, adding a vice-like friction to Brian's throbbing cock. "Oh God! Ah, fuck... Jesus..." Brian whined, his eyes shutting tighter. Justin smiled briefly, rolling his tongue over Brian's left nipple before lifting his lips higher. His lips latched onto the skin just above the nipple, his teeth nipping at the flesh. He let Brian fuck his legs while he pleasured in the feel of two fingers inside of his hole and a hand massaging his penis.
Baby, would you mind coming inside of me
Letting your juices free
Deep in my passion
(Is it good to you baby?)
Cause I'm gonna
Bathe you, play with you, rub you, caress you
Tell you how much I've missed you
I just wanna
Touch you, tease you, lick you, please you
Love you, hold you, make love to you
And I'm gonna
Kiss you, suck you, taste you, ride you
Feel you deep inside me, ooh
I just wanna kiss you, suck you, taste you, ride you
Feel you, make you come too
Brian found himself panting unknown phrases as his husband's legs brought him closer to and closer to heaven. He lovingly kissed the top of Justin's head before gasping out. "Beanie, I'm close..." he huffed out, proding further into Justin's body with his fingers. He let Justin spread his fingers over his stomach, feeling the tightness as Brian's body tensed. "Just cum baby..." Justin whispered, brushing a finger over Brian's nose. Brian hissed lowly and chewed on his lower lip, restraining him as the plesure dragged on.
Justin's balls tightened against his body and he lurched forward. 'God, this is becoming too much. We haven't had sex or even sucked each other off and it's feeling like we've done all that for hours.' Justin thought to himself as his husband began to leave charitable kisses on his bruised lips.
"Mmm, I love you... oh I love you Beanie..." Brian said against Justin's lips, his body shivering uncontrollably. "I.. I.. I love you too Rocky..." Justin gasped, arching his back completely.
Oh baby, would you mind?
Yeah
I just wanna
Touch you, tease you, lick you, please you
Love you, hold you, make love to you
And I'm gonna
Kiss you, suck you, taste you, ride you
Feel you deep inside me, ooh
I just wanna kiss you, suck you, taste you, ride you
Feel you, make you come too
The guitar solo racked through the room in a soft orchestra as moans and pants came quicker and louder. Justin felt an echoing moan in his throat but he held it back as Brian sucked on his neck, creating a tiny hickey at the bottom. "Oh, baby, shit..." Justin growled, forcing himself backward until he felt Brian's fingers burried deep inside of him, only the knuckles left on the exterior. "Rub right there baby..." Justin pleaded, tilting his head further back. Brian did not need another hint before he pressed harder onto Justin's protstae, trying to control his own body as it banged feverously against Justin's legs. "Shit... damn, Beanie, it's too much." Brian said quickly, biting down on Justin's collarbone. "Oh!" Justin groaned, raking his fingers down Brian's back.
Lips met briskly, controlling glass-shattering moans as an escalation of rapture entered the room. "Fuck fuck fuck... oh shit fuck... Rocky! Rock! Yes! God, Rocky! You're so good to me baby..." Justin groaned out, ejeculating long, thick streams of cum over Brian's stomach, pubic hair and hand. "Mmmm, mmm, mmm, ooh, damn it... Beanie!" Brian groaned back, arching his back to its height as he came explosively between Justin's legs, spurts of the semen shooting past Justin's legs and onto the sheets and a nearby pillow.
"Oh, oh, oh..." Justin moaned, easing back onto the bed as Brian slipped his hand off of his still bouncing cock. Justin didn't have the strength to look down. He couldn't handle the sight of his cum over Brian's body or the image of his cock, flushed and deep reddish-purple. He felt a cool, wet wet rub across his bottom lip, wiping a thick stream of cum over it. He moaned quietly, laying back. He accepted as kiss from Brian, Brian's tongue spreading the cum into Justin's mouth and into Brian's own.
"Mmmmm." Brian hummed, sucking on the lip as Justin spread his legs, letting Brian pull back. He felt Justin's fingers playing in the puddles of seed of his body as his own leg scooted between Justin's legs to feel the hot fluid between his thighs. "That was a little too hot baby." Brian whispered as Justin laid one of Brian's hands between his thighs. "It was." Justin agreed, opening his eyes as Brian massaged his inner thighs. The stimulation was too great. Not right after ejeculation. Not after he had just been masturbated and fingered by his husband. Not on his hot spot. Brian couldn't do that to him. Not right then.
Justin pulled the hand up and licked the fingers without care, his tongue running sloppily over them. "But it was passionate." Brian added, kissing the tip of Justin's nose. "Mmmm hmmm." Justin agreed with a broad grin, his tongue rolling over his lips to taste the final remains of Brian. He leaned forward and gave Brian a quick, but smooth kiss on the lips, never letting his smile die as Brian snuggled to him. This was comfort. This was nice. In fact, this was what Justin wanted for weeks. He was going to have it, whatever he had to do. He was going to have his husband in his arms at night. He was going to make love to him. He was going to snuggle up to Angel and Brian and his daughter. He was going to have it all, but he knew it was going to take time. Time was something Justin Littrell had.
"I can't fucking believe this!" Brian stirred awake suddenly. His eyes stayed barely open, glancing around the dark room with a startle. 'What the fuck?' Brian thought, glancing toward the alarm clock on the table. '2 AM? It's fuck 2 AM?' Brian thought, wanting to curl into Justin's arms again and fall asleep. It had been almost three hours since he and Justin had shared their bodies and now there was yelling in the hallway and that sounded like a fist slamming into the wall. "I know AJ and Amanda aren't at it again." Brian grumbled, curcling his fists into the sheets. He felt Justin scratch the back of his head, ruffling his hair. "That didn't sound like AJ baby." Justin whispered groggily. Brian yawned impatiently, listening to Justin sigh as doors opened in the hallway.
"Josh, I'm sorry! It wasn't my idea." another shout came and Brian shook in the bed. "That was Nick." Brian said, briskly sitting up in the bed. "That other voice must've been JC." Justin added, crawling behind Brian. "Oh, so those asshole control your life? You went along with the fucking plan." JC barked back and Brian couldn't stop himself from standing. "This isn't good." Justin said, slowly following Brian to the door.
Brian glanced into the hallway before stepping out in the hall, clad in only boxers and a pair of socks. Justin followed in a wifebeater and a pair of Brian's boxers. They saw a small group at one end of the hall, mainly the other Backstreet Boys, Britney and Christina. Near JC and Nick's room stood JC, Nick, and Leighanne. Brian scratched his head in confusion, watching the scene without a steady gaze.
"Josh, I'm sorry. I've been living with this for months and it's been killing me." Nick said, a few tears falling down his face as he tried to reach out to his husband. JC jerked away briskly. "Fuck that Nick. I've been living as your husband for months now and this shit ain't even right. You got me drunk and got me to marry you that night to keep me from Justin, to keep me from Nikki... to keep me from Lance. You, that bitch Leighanne, and Kevin plotted this shit to tear make Nikki want to go back to Kevin and to eventually break up Brian and Justin. You knew it wouldn't work for them with us, the two folks that tried to keep them apart, always causing arguments between them. And then Leighanne would get Brian, right? It'd be all wonderful because Justin wouldn't have shit in the end and that's what ya'll fucking want." JC hollered out, never stopping for a breath.
Gasps rocked through the hallway and Justin couldn't help but grip his husband's arm. It was a lie. JC was drunk that night and how could he have known that Leighanne and Kevin had set this up? That meant Leighanne and Kevin were the ones JC told Justin about. Leighanne was the woman, Kevin was the man and they made sure Nick married JC when JC was too inebriated to argue otherwise. All of that for what? To ruin Justin's life? To ruin JC's life? To screw Nikki over and leave Lance at a standstill about what was really going on inside of Lance's heart? To hurt Brian? To leave Angel with one father? The truth was there, but Nick stayed silent with tears streaming his face. He wasn't ready to say it all just yet.
TO BE CONTINUED...
Song Credits (In order of appearance)
- Emotion (Barry Gibb, Robin Gibb), performed by Destiny's Child - China Love (Janet Jackson, James Harris III, Terry Lewis), performed by Janet Jackson - Dangerously In Love (B. Knowles, E. McCalla Jr.), performed by Destiny's Child - Angel's Lullaby (J.M.), written for Brian Littrell - Would You Mind (Janet Jackson, James Harris III, Terry Lewis, Dana Stinsson), perfomed by Janet Jackson
--- This is exactly why I could NEVER work for a newspaper! I have no concept of a deadline! LOL. Yes, again, sorry about the wait. And now I KNOW everyone's going to harrass me to write the next part because I left ya'll with this cliffhanger. Well, the next part will be divided into two parts and hopefully I'll get them out without troubles. But with me, you know that's not possible! Anyways, THANK YOU TO ALL MY READERS! I swear, I love everyone of you to death. This is for you. This is a callobaration of what everyone wanted. Some wanted more Brian and Justin, some wanted juicy sex, some wanted drama, some wanted JC and Nick to have happy moments and there was more things too. Thanks to every last person who sent me an idea and who voted for the JC vote. Results will be coming pretty soon. Don't hate me in the end, hate the readers that voted! LOL. I hope this meets the expectations for some of you. I figured why not include a part where the characters show their appreciation toward an icon like I'm showing appreciation to all of you with this story. Also, BIG THANKS TO DAVID! Hadest working man in this business ya'll. I appreciate him and you for all the love. After this JC drama, expect a rather laidback story for Brian and Justin and probably another couple and expect a surprise in that story too! Definitely feeling Janet's new album, Destiny's Child's new one and City High's new album. So expect lyrics from these albums. Oh, and how hot are Brian and Nick in the new BSB video? I mean, DAMN! So fine. And Justin's new look is killing me. He's look so sexy to me. Uhm, otherwise, I think that's it. Oh, hi Allen! Love ya much and keep writing kick ass stories. Remember, I LOVE YOU ALL! ---