Brian and Justin

Just Begining (Chapter 31) Written by JM

-- Disclaimer: The actions and storyline of this story has no relation to that of the actual story 'Bad Boy B-Rok'. The events that take place in this story are no way a continuation or even a part of that story. The author, Leprechaun, was kind enough to allow his character to make an appearance, however Brian Littrell and Matt Thompson are not romantically linked. Matt will not make any further guest appearances unless noted by the author of 'Bad Boy B-Rok'. Thank you. --

*** 'Just when I thought I was to be alone forever...' This is the continuation to the series 'Brian & Justin'. This story involves a romance between celebrities, mainly that of Brian Littrell (of the Backstreet Boys) and Justin Timberlake (of 'N Sync). If you are offended by this kind of material, please do not read this series. If you have not read the first series, please do not read this one yet. I'd like you to know the story of Brian and Justin's saga. Otherwise, enjoy as we continue to drift into the lives of Brian & Justin and their friends. Any comments for me, please send to: lionclaw@bellsouth.net ***

*** Welcome to the second chapter of 'Brian & Justin', perfectly titled by David as 'Just Beginning'. I do hope you like this series and I hope to bring you as much joy and sorrow as the first series. As always, read stories like 'N Sync Love', 'Lost And Found' and 'The One' for good storyline. Special thank you to my inspiration and my "Blue", Leprechaun. Read 'Bad Boy B-Rok' for his work of art. Special thank yous to some of my closest friends also: Donnie, Shawn, CJ, Adam, Rick, Jason, River, Mano, Brian and Netboy. And very special thanks goes to all of my OLD & NEW READERS! I love you dearly for your support. The BIGGEST thank you goes to David at Nifty for his continuous support. As always, enjoy and hopefully, you won't be disappointed. So now, the story is 'Just Beginning...' ***

Morning was a beautiful sight. The yellow skies breaking through the pink shades that blanketed Orlando. The night eyes closing again to let in the natural light. The light of the morning crept into Brian and Justin's bedroom with a captivating touch. Justin yawned lowly when the sun reached his eyes. He grabbed a pillow and covered his head so that the rays would not blind him. 'Another morning Justin...' he did his best to awake his body. He removed the pillow and lifted his head. He propped his upper body up with his elbows. 'Another day without the guys though.' Justin tried to perk up the situation by thinking of the times he could share with Brian.

The sheets were tangled around his body. He ran a hand over his strawberry blonde hair and then looked at the figure sleeping next to him. He smiled lightly. "Baby... wake up." Justin whispered, rubbing the light brown head. "Mmmm.." he heard his husband moan. Justin smiled even brighter. He crawled up to Brian and placed small kisses on his back. "Come on Brian..." Justin shook him mildly. "Isn't it too early for us?" Brian groaned. "Nope. The guys will be back this evening and that 'Welcome Back' party is around eight tonight. I want to be able to spend just a few hours with you." Justin requested. He laid his head on Brian's back to listen to his breathing. Brian sighed and shook. "Okay Justin, I'll get up." Brian grumbled. Justin lifted his head and let Brian move around.

The two weeks for Justin and Brian moved in a small flash. Justin spent the first week helping Brian recover from his sickness. The other week was spent doing more work for the labels that Brian and Justin didn't look forward. Justin got to sit in luxery while escorting Jackie Littrell around and then spending time with his mother. He felt like he had accomplished alot of outside work but there were things that he needed to do more. One was to be around his husband as much as possible.

"So what do weo do?" Brian questioned, looking around the room. Justin smiled slyly. Before Brian had a chance to get a glimpse of the smile. Justin was straddling Brian on his waist and pinning down his arms. "What are you doing?" Brian asked out of surprise. "You're so sexy." Justin smiled. He leaned down and pressed his lips to Brian's. He began a slow kiss upon Brian's lips, soon getting Brian to join him. Justin let Brian's tongue slip into his mouth and he began to suck on it. Justin released Brian's wrists and moved his hands to Brian's face. Brian smiled with relief and pulled his hands up to Justin's back. He pulled Justin fully upon him. Brian continued to rub Justin's back and kiss him while Justin rubbed his face.

Justin pulled back from the kiss again before moving back in. He smiled before kissing Brian's soft lips again. Brian savored each touch. He moved his hands to Justin's upper back with pleasure. Justin moved away from the kiss again. "I missed kissing you." Brian whispered. Justin ran a finger over Brian's well defined cheek. Every curve meant something to Justin. "You can kiss me anytime you want Brian... these lips belong to you." Justin whispered back. Brian extended his tongue out and Justin smiled again. He stuck his tongue towards Brian's and together the tongues kissed erotically. 'Mmmmm... this is new.' Justin thought happily. Brian inched his head up and took the tongue into his mouth, starting another soft kiss.

Brian ended the kiss quietly. Justin gave no protest. "I'm getting hard baby..." Brian warned Justin. "There's nothing wrong with that Brian... we can just make love like last night." Justin replied lowly. He leaned down to begin kissing Brian's neck. Brian wrapped his arms around Justin and thought back to the night before. The night in which he and Justin made love three times to make up for two weeks of nothing. It was special for Brian, Justin making him feel so warm and soft. Brian felt the butterflies develop again. He felt Justin's tongue caressing the nape of his neck. Brian felt the need to release a moan and with a gasp, he did. Justin smiled, continuing to kiss Brian's neck.

"Mmmmm... this feel as good as last night..." Brian groaned. He ran his hands over Justin's curls with excitement. "Do you want to repeat last night Brian?" Justin offered, lifting his head. Brian wanted to say yes but he knew his body was still recovering from the night before. "Let's save that for a little later cutie." Brian suggested, tapping the end of Justin's nose. Justin nodded. Justin leaned down again and kissed the tip of Brian's nose. "You're as cute as a snowflake." Justin whispered. Brian giggled under Justin. "And that means?" Brian questioned. "That means I think I'll start calling you my Snowflake." Justin replied, raising his brow as he stared into Brian's baby blue eyes. "Snowflake? Cute." Brian chimed. "Mmmm... yes it is." Justin grinned. He bent down and kissed Brian's lips again. 'He really wants to make love...' Brian giggled to himself. It was a short kiss for Brian when Justin pulled back. Justin continued to suck on Brian's bottom lips after the kiss. Brian was lost in the emotion they were giving each other.

"If you don't stop now baby... I'm going to..." when Justin heard the words emerging from Brian's lips and he lifted his body. Justin shook his head with laughter. "I'm sorry Brian." he replied. Justin bent down and began to kiss Brian's shoulder.

Brian took force of the moment and rolled Justin over. Brian ended up on top of Justin with a smile. "You're not playing fair." Brian smiled, leaning down and kissing the top of Justin's chest. Justin giggled lowly. Brian's tongue ran down the center of Justin's pecs. Justin was already hard and didn't know how far their making out would go. "I feel like a teenager making out after losing his virginity." Justin laughed. Brian crawled back up Justin's body and kissed his cheek. "You still are a teen cutie." Brian chimed. "Hey, I'm eighteen." Justin disagreed. "Eighteen and married to a twenty-four year old." Brian said softly. "Age ain't nothing but a number." Justin added. "I'm glad you feel that way." Brian smiled. "It doesn't matter if you're ten years older than me, Brian. I fell in love with a man that does everything to make me happy." Justin assured him. Brian ran his hands over Justin's shoulders with happiness. "Besides, half the time you act my age anyways." Justin laughed out. Brian rolled his eyes with a silly smile. "You're too smart for your age." Brian warned him. "And am I too good in bed for my age?" Justin questioned. Brian smiled down on him. "After last night... no one at the age of eighteen will be able to run against you." Brian nodded. Justin smiled back, nibbling his lower lip.

"But you're still a little kid!" Brian shouted, beginning to tickle Justin wildly. Justin bursted into laughter as Brian's hands ran over his ticklish areas. "STOP! STOP SILLY!" Justin called out, crying with his laughter. Brian continued to tickle him, laughing at Justin's beat red face. "I'm gonna get you!" Justin laughed. "Ooh, get me sugar!" Brian snickered, stopping his tickling.

Brian gave Justin's ass a slap before rolling off of him. Justin shook his head and turned to his side. Brian used his finger to wipe away the fear tears that escaped Justin's eyes. "I'm going to catch a shower... will you come with me?" Justin requested. Brian frowned and turned onto his back. "I'll take one after you." he replied. Justin sighed lowly. "Why not with me?" Justin asked. He placed a hand on Brian's chest and ran it up and down. "Because if I do take a shower with you... we're going to make love in there." Brian answered, watching the hand on his chest. Justin nodded with a small frown. "There's nothing wrong with us making love baby. We're married and all." Justin disagreed calmly. Brian smiled and placed his hand on Justin's. "Three times lsat night boy. Don't you get enough?" Brian questioned. Justin laughed and pulled his hand from under Brian's. "Not of you." Justin replied.

Justin rolled out of the bed, ripping the sheets from his body. He stood and stretched loudly. "Well then I guess I'll be all alone..." Justin sighed. He scratched his head and began to walk for the bathroom. Brian watched him with a smile. Justin's body moved sleekly. His golden skin shined in the light. Brian watched him with love circling his blue eyes. "No you won't." Brian raised up from the bed with his words. He let the sheets fall to the ground before walking over to Justin. Justin turned around with surprise but Brian prevented him. Brian wrapped his arms around Justin's waist and rested his chin on Justin's shoulder. "Spoon." Justin whispered with a smile. "Mmmm, you bet." Brian grinned. "So does this mean you're going to shower with me?" Justin asked. Brian rocked his and Justin's body while standing. "Yes." Brian replied, kissing Justin's earlobe. "You're not worried about..." Brian grabbed Justin's arm and rubbed it. "There's condoms in the bathroom." Brian gave a simple answer to the question Justin was trying to form. "Does that mean that you want to?" Justin let his question come out with a whisper. "I guess you'll just find out." Brian chimed. He grabbed Justin's hand and led him to the bathroom.

Brian started the water while Justin stared at himself in the mirror. Brian slipped behind Justin and ran his fingers up and down the smooth back. "Do I have bags under my eyes?" Justin pondered. "Does it matter?" Brian replied, leaning forward to kiss Justin's shoulder blade. "I want to look good for the guys... I guess." Justin shrugged. Brian shook his head before kissing Justin's tattoo. "Justin... you always look good in my eyes... even when you're sick." Brian gave his opinion, retuning his lips to the back of Justin's lips. Justin closed his eyes and basked in the feel of Brian's thin lips. "I do?" Justin let out his question. "I have no reason to lie Just," Brian replied softly. His lips bumped into Justin's shoulder. "Now can we shower?" Brian requested, his hands sliding around to the front of Justin. They made their path down Justin's chest to his abs. "Mmmm... someone's been doing push-up's." Brian chimed. Justin giggled. "Should I grab the condom?" Justin questioned. Brian pulled Justin up and carried him into the shower by his waist. "If we needed, we'll get it." were Brian's last words before closing the shower door.

The water hit Brian and Justin's bodies when they entered. Brian embraced the water while Justin let it fall over his body. Justin turned so he was facing Brian, letting the water hit his backside. He leaned in and soon was embracing Brian. Brian smiled and hugged onto Justin. "Something wrong baby?" Brian questioned, massaging the small of Justin's back. "No... I just want to hold you." Justin answered. Brian nodded, letting the water run over them. Justin ran his hands over Brian's back while the water ran between them. He traced a finger down Brian's chest, over his scare.

"I guess we should wash up?" Justin suggested. Brian smiled and grabbed the soap. "If you say so Justin." Brian gladly ran the soap over Justin's chest. "I didn't mean each other..." Justin giggled. Brian continued to rub the soap over Justin's body. The soap slipped over Justin's finely shaped chest, gliding with precision. "I think you missed a spot." Justin whispered. He grabbed Brian's hand and led it down his smooth belly. "Lower?" Brian questioned seductively. "Just a little..." Justin pleaded. He carried Brian's hand passed his belly button, sliding further. The water pulsed over them as Brian's hand glided over Justin's erect penis. "Is this the spot?" Brian asked, leaning forward. Justin hummed and tilted his head back. Brian licked the nape of Justin's back and began to rub the soap over Justin's penis. Justin gasped out in pleasure. Brian licked Justin's adam apple and drug the soap to Justin's balls. Justin placed his hands on Brian's wet waist for slight support. "Is this making you feel better?" Brian asked, gropping Justin's soap dick with his wet hand while massaging Justin's smooth balls with the soap. "Please Brian..." Justin begged of him lowly. Brian ran his tongue to Justin's lips and licked the bottom lip gingerly. "You don't know how much I love you Justin..." Brian dropped the soap to rub Justin's hips. Justin panted and moved even closer to Brian. "I love you too." Justin said proudly. Brian licked Justin's upper lip and smiled.

Brian dipped his head into the water and pulled back with a splash. Justin brang his hands up to Brian's chest fervently. "There's something we should be doing right now." Justin panted. He ran his fingers over Brian's soft nipples. "What? Taking out the trash?" Brian laughed with his pants. "No... making love." Justin replied. He leaned down and took Brian's lft nipple into his mouth while massaging the right one. "Oh!" Brian groaned. He ran his fingers over Justin's moist curls and began to moan loudly. "So... you think we should make love?" Brian asked, trying to control himself. "Please..." Justin replied, lifting his head. Brian shook his head and backed away. "We don't have much time." he gave an answer, wiping the water from his face. Justin stared into the passionate blue eyes and saw a different answer.

Justin leaned against the wall and seductively pulled open the shower door. He saw Brian's eyes watching him with the exotic stare his blues always held. Justin licked his lips, staring back at Brian. Without even looking, his hand reached over to a nearby shelf. His hand dipped into a box and fished for something. Without looking, Justin knocked over the box after grabbing what he wanted. Justin licked his lips again and then smiled at Brian. "Can I make love to my husband?" Justin requested, flashing the blue condom wrapper. Brian giggled and shook his head again. "If you do it gently." Brian replied, walking back to Justin. "I promise baby." Justin gleamed, giving Brian a tender kiss on the cheek.

Brian lifted his right leg and bent it at the knee. His inner thigh ran against Justin's hip cautiously. Justin cupped the leg and lifted it. Brian took the condom from Justin's dripping fingers and tore it open with his teeth. He sucked the condom into his mouth. Justin watched him with spice running through his breaths. He grabbed Brian's other leg and wrapped them around his waist. Brian leaned forward and began to kiss Justin slowly. Justin placed his arms around Brian's backside for support while kissing. The water ran over their bodies like a river to it's rocks. The passion was spoken like that of a river's chime.

With a swift swivle of the tongue, Brian retracted back with a smile. Justin shook his head with an equal smile. Justin stuck his tongue out to show the condom was resting on his tongue. Brian reached his finger in and took the condom from Justin's tongue. "You're so sexy." Justin repeated. Brian nodded and brought the same hand down to Justin's erect penis. "Slowly." Brian requested again while Justin adjusted to the condom being slipped on. He lifted himself up and knew Justin was ready.

Justin leaned in for a small kiss and took it from Brian's lips. Brian lowered himself onto the strong head. He hissed lowly but kept his movement. Even after a year of sleeping with Justin, he still had to adjust himself each time. He didn't mind the feeling as when he adjusted the pleasure began. Justin held him closely and kissed his ear. "Does it hurt?" Justin whispered a question. Brian wrapped his arms around Justin's neck and slid further down. "Never." Brian gave a quick reply. Justin bit Brian's earlobe tenderly. Brian panted hard and came down even more.

"Make love to me Justin." Brian said in his soft, country accent. Justin gladly grasped Brian's hips and did as his husband requested. Justin lifted Brian's body slowly and brought it back down even slower. Brian let loose low grunts. Brian's hands began to rub Justin's shoulders while he closed his eyes. Justin closed his eyes slowly, making sure Brian was okay. Brian began to help Justin with their love making by raising himself up and down upon Justin's hard cock. The soapiness and wetness of Justin's penis made their love making easier for Brian. He let Justin lean against the showerwall for support. Justin bit his lower lip, moving his soft hands to Brian's thighs. "It feels nice..." Brian moaned. Justin smiled, knowing he was pleasing his lover. Brian kept the slow movements while Justin's lips began to suckle Brian's. Brian broke the kiss slightly to moan before dipping back into it.

Justin pulled back Brian's water drenched hair. He kissed Brian's forehead and held him as their love making thrusted on. Brian became trapped in his sexual feelings. "Oh... Just... ah, yes... mmmm, I missed this..." Brian groaned loudly. He ran a finger over Justin's cheek as he did so. "Brian.. baby... faster..." Justin requested, rubbing his hand down Brian's spine. "No... slower baby... make it last." Brian whispered. He kissed Justin's cheek and held him strongly. Justin nodded and thrusted upward hard yet slowly. Brian grunted with the feeling of Justin's head running his prostate. "Yes!" he panted out. He pictured back to what it was like to lose his virginity to Justin. An experience that lived forever in his mind. Brian was thankful he gave it to Justin instead others who had offered. Something about Justin's gentle hands and caressing lips comforted Brian. It brought him to ease.

Justin opened his eyes slightly and saw Brian staring into his eyes. Justin stopped thrusting and Brian stopped moving on him. Justin was caught by surprise. He wiped away a few drops of water from Brian's cheeks. He saw Brian's icey blue eyes and marveled in them. "Did I do something wrong?" Justin asked lowly. Brian shook his head and gave Justin a small smile. He leaned in and gave Justin a small but lasting kiss. "Let me do something." Brian whispered as he backed away. Justin nodded. Brian ran his fingers through Justin's soft, strawberry blonde hair. Brian saw the slight fear yet curiosity in Justin's blue eyes. "You trust me, right?" Brian pondered. Justin leaned his head aginst the wall and nodded. Brian nodded back.

Brian unwrapped his legs from Justin's body and slide off of him. Justin was a bit thrown by the feeling of his cock being withdrawn from Brian's body before their love making was finished. Brian ran his hands over Justin's abs as the warm water continued to fall. 'Man... I'm going to be paying a hefty bill later on.' Brian said to himself. He began to bend his knees and then slide all the way down Justin's body. Justin looked down at him with wonder in his blueish eyes. Brian kissed Justin's inner thigh with love. His tongue rolled over the soft skin, delicately teasing him. He did his movement ever so slowly, causing Justin to groan loudly. "Mmmmm... you're so sweet." Brian chimed, licking the skin with a tender tongue. Justin's left hand dripped down to Brian's hand and ran over the moist hair. He wanted Brian to continue yet he wanted Brian to stop teasing him. His mixed emotions added to the intense ecstasy of the moment.

Brian leaned in and took the head of Justin's erect penis into his mouth. Justin panted out and stared down at him. "Brian... I... I still have the..." Justin tilted his head back for another long moan while Brian suckled the head of Justin's covered penis. The water dripped from Justin's chin when he looked down again. The trail of water ran down Justin's pecs swiftly. The erect nipples were begging for attention while the water ran. The trail reached Justin's six=pack abs. The abs were smoothed out when the trail washed over Justin's belly button. The belly button did not catch the water. The water ran over Justin's small trail of hair, leading down to the sandy brown pubic hair. The sensations and sexual pleasure overwhelmed Justin. He watched Brian take more and more of him inside of his hot mouth. Justin trembled and shivered with pleasure. His blue eyes shut and his mouth let out soft pants. He felt a slight rub from Brian's teeth and then mouth again as Brian slid down his cock.

Justin's eyes glanced open to Brian. He watched as Brian's mouth lifted off of his cock. Justin looked at his erection and saw he was no longer wearing the light blue condom he had before. His dick was now slick with saliva, Brian's saliva. Justin looked at Brian while Brian stared up to him. Brian opened his mouth and dawned the condom laying on his tongue. Brian spit the condom out and inched back to Justin. "We don't need that anymore." he whispered before enhaling Justin's shaft once more. Justin groaned powerfully, grasping Brian's head for subtle support. Brian used a slow roll of his tongue over Justin's head while licking the underside of Justin's cock as he moved towards Justin's balls.

Justin bent at his knees and grunted. "I'm... close... baby..." Justin panted out loud enough for Brian's ears to hear over the running water. The oral sex was more than Justin could have asked for. He felt his balls contricting slightly. 'Almost...' Justin thought to himself. Brian ran his tongue over the piss slit with care. Justin couldn't take any further pleasure and released himself. "Brian! Hmmmph... oh yes... thank you..." Justin moaned hard. His cum began to shoot from his penis with an errupting explosion. Brian prepared himself for the cum, taking each shot into his mouth and then his throat. The pulsating cock brought upon his new sexual crave for Justin. He rubbed Justin's inner thighs to make the orgasm even more intense. "Brian... please... I can't... I... oh!" Justin let his cum continue to flow from his body. Brian thought the fountain was never ending as even the dribbles of cum were thick in their substance. "Oh Brian... this is the best..." Justin gasped, rubbing his hair.

Justin brought one of his hands up to his chest and pinched his right nipple with the orgasm ending. He laid his head back and rested against the shower wall. He let Brian take care of him as his cock became soft again. Brian smiled and released Justin's penis. He began to lick the soft head with care. "Mmm... I.... mmmm... love.... hmmm... you..." Brian said, licking harder on Justin's soft penis. He brought his tongue under the cock to Justin's balls. He licked the balls that had just released Justin's honey to him. "You taste so sweet to me." Brian added, licking the balls with care. He ran his hands up and down Justin's legs while continuing to savor upon his husband's skin. Justin rested his hands on the wall of the shower as the water washed his sweat away.

Brian stood from the floor and smiled at Justin. He saw a salty tear run from Justin's eye. He grabbed the tear on his finger and washed it away. He placed his tender hands on Justin's hips and embraced him. "You're going to be okay." he assured Justin. Justin was still panting with low sobs. "I'm sorry... you must think I'm stupid..." Justin sniffled. "No... baby that was a true orgasm you had. You didn't cum... you had a sexual orgasm." Brian tried to explain to Justin why his tears fell. Justin comprehended little, being young and vunerable to Brian. "So it's okay that it still feels good?" Justin questioned. Brian kissed Justin's cheek and then blazed a smile. "It should feel good for a bit longer Just. That's what happens when you orgasm." Brian stated softly.

Justin placed a hand on Brian's shoulder. "Have I ever given you an orgasm like this?" Justin let his silent thoughts be heard. "Yes... a couple of times baby. It feels so good too." Brian whispered. He brushed his lips over Justin's, not kissing them fully. Justin's hand drifted to Brian's head, trying to pull him into a full kiss. Brian backed away slightly. He reached over Justin and pulled down a bottle of TiGi Bed Head Moisture Maniac Shampoo. He squirted some into his hands and then lathered it up. He placed his hands on Justin's hair and began to apply the shampoo to Justin's hair. Justin allowed Brian to shampoo his hair in silence. He enjoyed Brian's massaging fingers as they ran all over his hair. He felt relaxed again while Brian lathered his hair extensively.

"Come here..." Brian used his soft, country accent to persuade Justin. Justin followed Brian under the stream of water to wash out the shampoo. Justin closed his eyes and let the water douse his hair as Brian made sure all of the suds were gone. He pulled Justin's wet curls back under the water and let Justin savor the water falling over his face. Justin shook his head around, letting the water splash everywhere. Brian giggled and backed away from Justin. Justin smiled at his husband. "You're too sweet." Justin whispered. Brian scratched his nose, keeping his ginger smile. "Let's get out of here." Brian suggested. Justin nodded and turned off the water.

Brian was the first to step out and grab a towel while Justin followed. Justin pulled a towel from the rack and wrapped it around his waist. Brian let his body drip while drying his hair with the towel. Justin watched Brian again with a keen eye. 'I really do feel like a married couple now.' Justin thought. He watched while Brian grabbed his toothbrush and began running water at the sink. Brian caught Justin smiling at him in the mirror. He giggled and then looked to a foggy area of the mirror. He traced the words, 'I love you' on the mirror and then smiled at Justin's reflection. "You're so damn goofy." Justin laughed, walkig up to the sink. Brian smacked Justin's ass hard and then applied toothpaste to his brush. "It's too early for you to be cussing boy." Brian warned him.

Justin rolled his eyes and grabbed his Bed Head Stick from the mix of hair gels on the counter. "I think I'm going to just let the dye grow out and wear my original hair color." Justin commented, squeezing some gel into his hair. "You'd look cute." Brian agreed, beginning to brush his teeth. "I would huh?" Justin questioned, gelling his hair. Brian nodded, his mouth filled with foam. "Do you like what I did to your hair?" Justin questioned, commenting on how he had dyed Brian's hair a more blonde color the other day. Brian shrugged, adjusting to seeing the blonde highlights in his hair. "You're so boring." Justin laughed, finishing his hair. He ran his hands under the water Brian was running and shook the excess water off on Brian. Brian raised his hand and gave Justin the middle finger. "We just did that cutie." Justin snickered, walking by Brian. Brian spit into the sink as Justin pulled out his toothbrush. "And it was great!" Brian boasted, rinsing off his toothbrush. Justin nodded, appling his Crest.

Brian dropped his toothbrush on the sink and snatched up his cologne. "Top back on the 'paste baby." he remined Justin. spritzing on his Photo cologne. Justin waved him off while brushing. Brian slipped on his cross and looked at himself in the mirror. He saw the scar that ran a small length of his chest. He stiffened up a bit before resting a hand over it. Justin watched him with curiosity. "What... are you doing?" Justin's words were mumbled as he continued to brush his teeth. "I'm so happy you've been there with me each time I've been in the hospital." Brian commented, removing his hand. Justin crinkled his nose and then spit into the sink. "Something wrong?" Justin asked. He rinsed his mouth, awaiting a reply from Brian. "When I had my hert surgery, the guys really couldn't be there. They had touring and stuff to do and could only be there a short period of times. I mean I had family and it was great but then there was Leigh Ann. She didn't... she was like you when you'r at the hospital with me. She tried to comfort me but it wasn't the same. She didn't show as much love and little attention that I seem to need. She was just there saying it'll be okay but not really showing me that it would be." Brian explained his feelings about the situation. Justin listened his spraying on his Armani cologne. "So you were kind of lonely?" Justin pondered. "I had family... just not... you." Brian answered. Justin nodded, understanding his husband's soft words.

Justin placed his arms around Brian's chest and stood behind him. "You have me now... God forbid it, but if you ever have to go in for surgery again, I'll be there for you." Justin assured him. Brian smiled brightly. "She didn't do this for me." he added softly. "She doesn't want to give you all of her heart like I do." Justin informed Brian. Brian rubbed Justin's cheek with affection. "She could never be you." Brian whispered. He looked at himself and Justin in the mirror and saw something he never saw. It wasn't in the movies, no one wrote a song about it, it wasn't a romance novel and it wasn't the best Soap Opera. It was Brian and Justin. It was something that Brian left was undescribable. A white flame that he knew was lit for a reason, in their hearts and in their souls.

Just Beginning (Chapter 32) Written by JM

The bathroom door swung open loudly. Brian walked out carrying Justin in his arms. Justin was cuddling to Brian as Brian carried him over to their large bed. "Whatever happened to that waterbed of yours babe?" Justin pondered as Brian layed him down on the bed. Brian crawled ontop of Justin and began to kiss his neck. "It's in storage... until I need it again." Brian replied, his lips still brushing Justin's neck. Justin took in the information while placing his hands on Brian's neck. Brian stopped kissing Justin's neck and trailed his kisses to Justin's chin. He peered out of the top of his vision to see Justin drifting in and out of a sleep. "I'm guessing this won't be one of those days where we make passionate love all day?" Brian pondered, ending his kisses. "No... we can make love." Justin replied sheepishly. He pulled the towel from his waist and spread his legs for Brian.

Brian smiled but didn't return to kissing Justin. "Why don't you take a nap... we can continue our sex session in an hour or so." Brian suggested, kissing Justin's lips once before peeling off of his body. Justin yawned softly and blinked his eyes open. "No... make love to me." Justin begged, grabbing Brian's ankle. Brian shook Justin off with a grin. "I prefer my husband rested so he can stay awake when I cum." Brian replied, winking at Justin. He pulled a pillow over to where Justin laid and let Justin lay his head on it. "Sleep with me then." Justin pouted. Brian shook his head and crawled out of the bed. "I've got a few things to do and I'm kind of hungry too. All of this sexual release makes me hungry for a thick, juicy sausage." Brian teased Justin. Justin rolled his eyes at Brian.

"I'm going to head downstairs and lt the dogs out and grab some food." Brian stated, pulling on some black athletic shorts and an ash gray Nike T-shirt. Justin gave a small nod, grabbing the remote to flip on the television. Brian watched as Justin flipped on Absolutely Fabulous on Comedy Central. Brian shook his head with a small laugh and walked back to the bed. "Don't watch the porno channel without me babe." Brian whispered, kissing Justin on the forehead. Justin giggled and nodded. "What if I want to take notes on positions?" Justin asked as Brian walked away. "Baby.. I'll show you my favorite position later." Brian snickered, walking out of the room. Justin's eyes stayed on the T.V. as Patsy and Edina walked the desert with a camel. He snickered lightly, patting his pillow. Justin gave another yawn and closed his eyes while the comedy continued on the television.

Brian walked back into the bedroom to grab his watch. He saw Justin sleeping peacefully. His smile was angelic while looking at Justin. Brian crept over to the bed and gently sat down next to Justin. He lightly ran his hand over Justin's soft cheek and smiled. The innocence painted into Justin's face was beautiful to him. "It's true... God did spend a little more time on you..." Brian whispered to Justin. He thought of how the perfection was only saw by him. He could imagine how God created Justin. The canvas was unque in itself. The way God painted a drop of the sun into Justin's hair. The perfect strokes used to give Justin's skin the color it's tone. The velvet used to make Justin's skin as soft as a baby. The way God painted a smile into Justin's heart so that his smile was brighter than the Northern Star. The way the brush glided over Justin's lips with scarlet red paint. The way God dipped His hands into the ocean and sprinkled it's drops into Justin's eyes to create their dark blue color. The paint that was used to give Justin's body the perfect hue. Brian could see where God took the clay and molded Justin's body into a sight of beauty. The way God made Justin's hands like that of a glass maker, gentle and careful to what they may touch. Brian was in awe of how perfect Justin seemed to him. His favorite part was Justin's heart. The way God placed a diamond in the center so that Justin's love always glew in the sight of Brian's baby blue eyes. Brian leaned down and gave Justin another small kiss. "Sleep well baby." he whispered before exiting the room again.

An hour passed with Brian downstairs in the kitchen. He had finished a whole meal and was now blending a banana milkshake in the blender he received from Chris for a wedding present. The loud noise didn't allow Brian to hear what was happening in his home. He stopped the blender when he felt that everything had been mixed fully. "Baby, when someone's sleeping, it's not cool to use a blender." Brian heard the voice of his husband walk by him. Brian shook with shock. He turned his head to Justin who was medling in the fridge. "Justin... oh I'm sorry cutie. I just thought I'd make a shake for energy." Brian explained himself, still shaking off the surprise. "What's wrong, coffee not kicking it anymore?" Justin joked with Brian. Brian poured a glass of his drink as Justin walked by again. Brian admired Justin who wore nothing but a pair of Nike shorts and white socks. "I need healthy energy J." Brian laughed. "For sex eh?" Justin continued to tease him. "Oh yes baby! You're a stallion and I want to ride you." Brian grinned, giving a false answer. "Mmmm, buck me bronco." Justin winked at him.

Justin took a seat at the table in the kitchen and took a small bite out of a peach. Brian slid over to him and took a seat in his lap. Justin welcomed his husband's warmth. "A peach?" Brian pondered, watching Justin take another bite out of the peach. Justin nodded happily. He drapped an arm on Brian's legs while the other was propped on the table. "No cereal for Grumpy today?" Brian asked. Justin shook his head, still not giving Brian a verbal reply. "Did anyone ever tell you that you have a cute penis?" Justin asked lowly. Brian fell into a laughter with that comment. "Did anyone ever tell you that that can be an offensive comment?" Brian snickered. "I didn't mean it was small... it's FAR from small." Justin commented, causing Brian to blush heavily. "I just meant it was so nice to look at. It's no displeasing at all... it's I gues perfect." Justin explained. "Are you saying this because you want to see it or something?" Brian continued to joke causing Justin to elbow him. "I'm saying this because I had a dream and I just admired you for hours." Justin confessed. Brian nodded and shrugged. "Then you're far from small too baby... very far." Brian whispered, rubbing a finger to Justin's inner thigh. Justin took a bite from his peach to contain his moan. Brian grabbed Justin's propped arm and brought it towards him. Brian took a bite out of the peach and munched on it. "Do you think I want your germs on my peach?" Justin gave him an odd look while speaking. Brian leaned forward and pressed his lips to Justin's. He began a soft kiss that Justin found hard to resist.

Brian made the kiss short to swallow the rest of his peach. Justin nibbled his lower lip. "We need milk from the store." Brian commented before sipping on his shake. Justin sighed. "So you're going to go?" Justin pondered. Brian took another bite of Justin's peach before nodding. He ran a finger over Justin's lips. "You are a real peach baby." Brian whispered. Justin nudged him, knowing Brian was trying to make him smile. Brian kissed Justin's lips again. Justin pulled back cautiously. "Are you going?" Justin asked again. Brian sighed softly before nodding.

Brian stood from Justin's lap with a small frown. "Do you want to come?" Brian offered, bringing his cup to the sink. "We can't afford that baby. If people see us both, we're in for it." Justin replied, standing from the chair. He was glad that he and Brian had not received too much media trouble with both being off the tour. "Well thank God Bryce has covered for you leaving the tour." Brian commented. Justin stretched and then yawned. "Yes... that's a good thing." Justin agreed, throwing the pit of his peach into the trash. "Yeah, family emergenices are never good." Brian sighed, cleaning off the counter. He felt Justin's arms around his waist. They secured themselves as Brian stopped moving. "You're my 'family'. I'm Justin Randall Littrell, remember?" Justin spoke into Brian's ear. "I'll never forget." Brian smiled. Justin kissed Brian's shoulder and then released him.

"I've got to go downstairs and do some laundry. You brought back two weeks worth of dirt." Justin stated with a silly grin. Brian turned around and smiled at Justin. "Look at you, the perfect house wife." Brian winked at him. "I try to be." Justin exhaled, walking out of the kitchen.

The washer ran as did the dryer while Justin folded clothes in the room reserved for the laundry. He scratched his head after putting down one of Brian's shirts. 'Gee, he was sick.' Justin thought as he looked at one of Brian's shirts. He threw it into the pile with the white's and shifted through more clothing. "Can I add something to the pile?" Brian requested, stepping into the room. "Did you spill something?" Justin asked, glancing over his shoulder to look at Brian. "No... I leaked something." Brian replied, walking passed Justin and taking a seat on the dryer. "Huh?" Justin blurted out. He looked at Brian who sat upon the dryer. Brian was holding up his pair of athletic shorts in his hand. Justin looked down and noticed Brian had not been wearing any underwear of boxers under the shorts. His penis was at full length and standing proudly. "I was thinking about our honeymoon and well..." Brian began to speak shyly. Justin looked back up with shock. "Could you help out?" Brian asked of Justin.

Brian dropped the shorts into the pile of clothing and spread his legs. "Please..." he whispered. Justin dropped the shirt he was holding and crept up to Brian. "Here?" Justin asked lowly. Brian nodded. He was nervous but he knew what he wanted. He leaned down and kissed the tip of Justin's nose. "For me..." Brian said softly. He grabbed Justin's hand and brought it to his lower body. Justin shyly placed his hand on Brian's cock and held it loosely. Brian smiled and then closed his eyes.

Justin began to slowly jack Brian off. Brian's legs were spread enough for Justin to stand between them. "Mmmmmmmmmm." Brian hummed, running his hands between his thighs. Justin watched as his hand moved, caressing the rosey red head and then sliding down the velvet-like shaft. Brian panted lowly, gradually getting louder with the speed of Justin's soft hand. Justin grabbed the base of Brian's dick with his free hand and held it. He took his other hand and began to just rub the head of Brian's cock, stimulating Brian. "Oh Just!" Brian moaned loudly. He tilted his head back and breathed heavily. Justin knew how to bring Brian to the extent of pleasure. Brian began to buck his hips with Justin's hand, thrusting his penis into Justin's palm. "Ooh, a little... faster... I'm... I'm... I'm almost.. oh baby, yes... almost there..." Brian panted hard. He brought his head down and opened his eyes to look at the wonders Justin was working upon him. He watched while Justin's soft hands rubbed him quickly. His breathing quickened and his eyes shut once again. He felt his balls drawing closer to his body. He knew his body wouldn't hold out much longer. "Mmmph... heh heh... shit... oh Justin... oh yes!" Brian grunted while cumming. Justin watched as shot after shot of cum flew into the air and landed on different areas, including Justin's chest. Brian's breaths were heavy. He managed to get the strength to throw his arms around Justin for support. Justin released Brian's softening penis to help support Brian.

Brian let out his last, soft moan. He lifted his chin from Justin's shoulder and then kissed his cheek. He took another moment to relax. "Thank you." he whispered. Justin pushed back Brian's sweaty hair with a small smile. "You're welcome." he replied.

Brian looked down at their bodies and saw they both had drops of cum over their bellies and chests. He grabbed the shirt Justin had just folded and began to wipe down their bodies. "Hey... I just washed that." Justin complained while Brian wiped off the drops from Justin's chest. "And I just got cum all over it. Sue me." Brian giggled. Justin slapped Brian's thigh and smiled.

"I guess I had better go shopping before it gets too late." Brian suggested, dropping the shirt to the clothes that were on the floor. Justin nodded with a sigh. "Damn, now I'll have to get some new clothes." Brian grumbled, hopping off of the dryer. "You could always go naked." Justin teased him. He watched Brian's ass as he walked by. "The ladies would love that." Brian chuckled. "The guys too." Justin added with a seductive grin. "You're looking at my ass." Brian giggled, turning to see Justin. "I can't help it if it's cute." Justin replied. Brian shook his head and ran upstairs for their bedroom. Justin returned to the laundry he was doing.

The night came so swiftly for Orlando. The sun hid under the blanket of the night to sleep while the stars opened their eyes for the Orlando streets to admire. A large lounge within the Trans Continental offices was the perfect spot for a party that starry night. That lounge held many friends and somewhat family who all celebrated the return of Trans Con's former group, the Backstreet Boys, 'N Sync, Aaron Carter and the girls of 702 to Orlando. The Backstreet Boys World Tour had ended with a grand review and now the time for celebration after a month of hard work was at hand for everyone.

The room's occupants ranged from tour workers to Johnny Wright to a few girls from the group Innosense to the guys of the Backstreet Boys to the Backstreet Band to the choreographer Fatima and even that of Lynn Harliss and Jane Carter.

"So with the webpage, you don't want me to mention anything about your... uhm marriage?" Melinda, 'N Sync's special projects producer and tour publicist questioned Justin. "Exactly. I don't think the fans need to know right now." Justin replied with a ginger smile. "Okay, I'll keep that quiet. Bryce said just to keep it short and sweet most times and not go into any of your personal lives unless you all allow it." Melinda explained. Justin took a sip of his glass of water and nodded. "That's just for our sake and safety." Justin stated. "Gee... it was so much easier working for Aaron and Trey D. I didn't have to worry about their personal lives at all." Melinda joked. "Welcome to the World of 'N Sync." Justin giggled. Melinda laughed along to keep their mingling moving.

"I am just too tired." A.J. yawned, resting his head on Amanda's shoulder. "I bet. All of those girls throwing panties, condoms, bra's and things like that at you. I bet that just wore you out." Amanda sneered. "Actually no... it was trying all of that stuff on that wore me out. I think I'm about a double B." A.J. laughed. Amanda shoved him with a small smile. "You're just nasty." Amanda sighed. "Aaaaww, do you think our baby will be like me?" A.J. cooed, rubbing Amanda's belly. "I hope not." Amanda teased him. A.J. smiled happily for her adoring eyes.

"I can't tell you how much I missed you." Kevin whispered to Nikki. They were in a corner of the room trying to have a quiet and intimate moment together. "I missed you just as much Pumpkin." Nikki replied. She circled her finger around the top of her champagne glass and then gazed up to Kevin's clear blue eyes. "I wish you could have came to Europe witht he girls." Kevin sighed, rubbing his finger over her chin. "I wish I could too but I had 'entertaining to do'." Nikki sighed. "That bad?" Kevin questioned. "Let's not even talk about it Pumpkin." Nikki suggested. "Okay Peach." Kevin smiled for her. It was rare that Kevin shared a smile with anyone and Nikki was one of the people able to draw that out of him. Nikki took a sip of her champage and gazed to the side to see Danay and Howie becoming closer. "That's so cute. I didn't think they'd be that close." Nikki chimed when she saw them. Her words were taken in lightly before she felt a pair of lips kiss her cheek. Nikki turned her head back to Kevin with surprise. "Nikki... let's stay at my place tonight." Kevin whispered. Nikki was caught off guard by Kevin's suggestion but she knew what he had in mind. "Uhm... are you sure? I mean we're ready..." Kevin placed a finger over her lips and smiled. "I missed you so much." Kevin added to his previous words. Nikki let Kevin brush her hair back with a fondness. "Pumpkin... it's not too soon?" Nikki continued to fear. "I trust both of us to be able to know when something is too soon." Kevin replied softly. He rubbed her cheek with his hand and then kissed her again on the cheek. Nikki let Kevin hug her as she pondered the idea Kevin was proposing.

"Well isn't that cheap. The man gets back in town to his girlfriend and all of the sudden wants to act like he loves someone." Irish bitterly said. "Someone's not showing love." Brian sung to her. "To what?" Irish smiled. Brian shook his head at her. "We're not even going to go there Mr. Littrell. You weren't there to see what an ass he was being." Irish warned him. "If you say so." Brian giggled. Irish crinkled her nose at him before rolling her eyes. "But I'm happy to be back in the States. I'll be even happier to get home." Irish commented. "Are you already ready to leave Justin?" Brian questioned with his light smile. "He won't miss me boy." Irish laughed. "Nah, he loves you now." Brian informed her. "Like a sister huh?" Irish questioned, taking a sip off of her drink. "Well he can't love you like a girlfriend, he's married to me." Brian chimed. "Baby, I've got a man." Irish put her hand in front of Brian's face with a smile. "Well he's nothing like mine." Brian argued kindly. "Now so you say." Irish laughed.

Nick grabbed a full champagne glass from the mini-bar and began to sip on it. He smiled, feeling satisfied with getting another glass. "Could you take it easy Nickie? That's your third glass tonight." J.C. pleaded as he walked up to Nick. "It's a party right?" Nick questioned with a gentle smile. He grabbed J.C.'s hand with no reservations. "Nothing compared to the party we're having in my bed tonight." J.C. replied with a wink. Nick grinned back at him. He inched near J.C. and watched the others around him. "Then let me enjoy this beverage now before I get a nice, creamy one later." Nick whispered, giving J.C. a small kiss on the lips. Nick didn't attempt to make the kiss with his boyfriend last. J.C. sighed softly and let Nick walk away with his glass of champagne.

'He sure can put away some alcohol.' J.C. thought to himself sorely. "Something bothering you?" he heard a female question. J.C. looked back to see Jane Carter standing nearby. "Uhm yes... your son actually." J.C. sighed. "My son? How could he bother you?" she questioned, grabbing a champagne glass. "Not him per say... more like his actions." J.C. offered a simple explaination. "Like?" Jane asked for more of him. "Like how many glasses of champagne he's had tonight. Nick doesn't control his drinking habits too well." J.C. replied. "Ah well, I think he'll be fine. He's just living up his younger days. Robert says since he's nineteen now he should have that freedom. I agree. Nick's just doing what he wants now but when he gets older, he'll be more in control." Jane shrugged off J.C.'s worries. "But don't you fear him doing something crazy or irrational?" J.C. wondered. Jane's eyes searched the room for her son. "No, I think as long as he's around Brian, he'll be just fine." Jane smiled. She raised her glass to the room and tried to catch Nick among the others. J.C. took in the comment painfully. He frowned and grabbed a glass of champagne. "And what about real his boyfriend?" J.C. hissed out before walking away from Jane. Jane watched him with a troubled eye. 'If Brian was Nick's boyfriend J.C., then you wouldn't have to worry about it.' Jane said in her head.

The music was loud and yet gave the room a more party-type atmosphere. It had been almost two hours of partying for everyone. Brian sat at the bar with Nick, Meelah, Chris and Misha. "No, no, no. When Kevin dropped his mic in Italy, that was the funniest thing." Meelah and Misha bickered friendly. "How about when Nick ran onstage with his fly open?" Chris suggested an answer. "Ooh, really?" Misha cooed. "Yep... see J.C. had just finished..." Chris started. "Okay enough of that story!" Meelah threw her hand over Chris's mouth to stop him. Misha broke into laughter watching the couple. Chris pulled her hand away and kissed her cheek. "I was just going to say..." Meelah quickly threw her hand over Chris's mouth again. "We don't want to know." she giggled. Chris grasped her sides and began to tickle her for his release. "Stop it boy!" she laughed loudly. "Now until you say you love me!" Chris cooed. Misha continued to laugh at the battling couple.

"It's been a great night Bri. I'm so happy to be back." Nick let out in a soft slur. "It's good to have you back Frack." Brian agreed. "Yeah... I guess I missed you most of all. It wasn't the same on tour without you." Nick nodded, looking down into his glass. "But you had J.C." Brian reminded him. Nick nodded and then shrugged. "It still wasn't the same without you." Nick said, lifting his head. Brian sighed and stared into Nick's eyes. "I'm sorry Nickie. I got sick and had to come home." Brian stated. "Oh I know cutie, I know." Nick assured him, rubbing his hand over Brian's. Brian looked down at the two hands touching with a fond forgiveness. "I still wish you were there though." Nick whispered.

Nick's finger traced a heart over top of Brian's. "Uhm Nick..." Brian pulled his hand from under Nick's. Nick shook with shock. "I'm sorry Bri. I just got caught up in the old times, that's all." Nick replied. Brian nodded, feeling awkward around Nick. "Well look, I'll leave you be Brian if you do me one favor." Nick said softly. Brian agreed shyly. "Celebrate with me." Nick chimed. "But I already am silly." Brian laughed. Nick shook his head. He grabbed a full champagne glass from the side and pushed it towards Brian. "Celebrate with me baby." Nick repeated. Brian cocked his eyebrow at Nick. "Come on Brian. I won't tell your little precious Justin. Just be happy with me that we're back and everyone is okay." Nick pressured him even more. Brian looked at the glass with heavy hesitation. "For Frack, please." Nick pleaded. Brian sighed and grabbed the glass with a shaking hand. "Just say 'Cheers'." Brian grumbled.

Nick tilted his glass towards Brian's and Brian did the same. 'Just tap glasses and don't drink any. You don't need alcohol to be happy Brian.' Brian told himself. Their glasses touched with a slight ring. "Cheers B-Rok." Nick smiled, taking a sip of his champagne. Brian began to place his glass down when he peered someone out of the corner of his eye. He turned slightly and saw Justin's peircing eyes staring at him. "Ju... Justin..." Brian stuttered when they made eye contact. Justin shook his head with shame while his face was flushed. "Justin... don't jump to conclusions." Brian already knew what Justin was thinking. "Right, don't do that Justin. Don't think your husband is about to drink some alcohol. Don't think he's doing it with the one man that he almosted cheated on you with. God forbid don't think that Brian would actually do it here in public. Just stay calm Justin and don't make a scene about how your heart is breaking because your husband is about to betray a vow that you believed in with your entire being." Justin let his words come out in an angered and yet devestated tone. "But none of that happened..." Brian disagreed. "Then what happened Brian? Your hand is on the glass, Nick's sitting right there. What happened? The glass and Nick just appeared?" Justin argued. Brian shook his head with spite. "Would you at least ask me?" Brian pleaded with disturbance. "Ask you! Yeah, let me ask you do you plan on using a condom when you cheat on me?" Justin blurted out. Meelah, Misha and Chris's attention was caught by the scene.

"Justin, I'm not doing shit with Nick. I wasn't going to drink anything." Brian became angered by Justin's distrust. "Then why the hell did you toast with him?" Justin barked. "Because he asked me to. I was going to drink the champage damnit." Brian barked back. "Hey hey you two, chill out." Chris intervened, seeing where the situation was going. "Nick Carter, man of all schemes. Brian sometimes it amazes me how he gets you every single time." Justin whimpered, keeping his angered expression. "It amazes me how my own fucking husband is acting like a child and not having any trust in me." Brian hissed. Justin shook off the tears he knew he wanted to cry. "You don't know what I went through when you hit me and left me for that asshole. You have no idea. I felt like I was going to have a heart attack Brian. I love you so much and I could have lost you and everything I had." Justin whimpered, finally letting the tears break from his eyes. Brian stood from his chair with pain. "And you don't know what I go through every single night. Every night where I have that same nightmare about what happened. Where in my mind I tried to convince myself that it was because my wrist hurt or it was because I was confused or it was because I thought you were some monster. I have to see your face crying and suffereing every time I close my eyes and it's not easy. That guilt is still there and it wasn't fair what I did but I have to live with it. I made a vow to you that I plan to keep but if you can't trust me, then why try?" Brian let his heart out with his anger. Justin backed away before walking away. Brian let a few single tears escape his eyes before returning to his own seat.

Chris patted Brian's back for comfort. "Do you want me to go talk to him about it?" Chris offered. "No. Let him think about it for a little bit." Brian replied lowly. Chris nodded and then walked back to his own seat. Nick rested his hand on Brian's shoulder for more support. "I'm sorry Brian. I shouldn't have suggested we drink." Nick whispered. Brian shrugged and looked at the glass. "I love him too much to do that to him." Brian softly said. Nick rubbed Brian's shoulder and stood from his chair. "I love you too B-Rok." he whispered. Brian turned to him with wonder.

Before he said anything, Nick pressed his lips firmly to Brian's. Brian was caught off guard by Nick's quick movement. Brian swiftly grabbed Nick's shirt and jerked him back. Nick's eyes flung open with shock. "Don't you ever... EVER fucking do that again. Do you hear me? I love Justin." Brian hissed at him. Nick nodded with worried eyes. "I... I... I was just trying to comfort you." Nick stuttered, "You don't have to use your lips to comfort me." Brian replied releasing Nick's shirt. Brian stood and then walked away with his anger following him.

Nick shook off Brian's agressiveness. He turned in the opposite direction to leave. When he did, his eyes met with a pair of blue eyes. His mouth fell open with surprise. J.C.'s eyes were filled with rage and tears. "You said you loved me Nick." he whispered. Nick's lip trembled. "I do... please Josh, I do." Nick reached his hand for J.C.'s. J.C. jerked back. "You kissed him and I saw you. I don't care how drunk you are, you kissed him." J.C. blurted out. "It was a friendly kiss." Nick disagreed. "Nick, you kissed Brian!" J.C. barked. Nick shook with shock. He had never seen J.C. so mad at him. "Joshua... he's my friend, please don't do this to me. You're... you're my breath. Josh I can't breathe without you." Nick whimpered. Tears seemed to break from his eyes. J.C. shook his head. His heart was falling to pieces in front of Nick. "I can't do this without you Joshua..." Nick sobbed softly. "Nick you kissed Brian..." J.C. whispered again, turning away from Nick. J.C. began to walk away and leave Nick with the tears sliding down his face. Nick let his won tears roll down his face. He quickly wiped them away and changed his direction once more. 'Hmmm... good boy J.C. Give Nick the perfect chance to look for Brian.' Jane Carter thought with a simplistic smile.

"I'm going outside to check on Justin." Lynn whispered to Britney before walking away. Britney was caught up in the scene that her and only a few others had witnessed. "Man, he's such an asshole when he's drunk." Kevin hissed, hanging onto Nikki. "I think he just needs a little help." Nikki added. "A little? I guess you haven't seen Nick like this. Where he's always messing up?" Kevin disagreed. "Maybe he just wants attention." Britney offered a suggestion. "Maybe we should all leave him alone." Howie said as he and Danay joined the conversation. "What? Leave him alone? And let him mess up one more time?" Kevin questioned loudly. "This is my exit." Nikki said, backing away from the others. "I mean he's nineteen now. We can't be held accountable for all of his actions all the time." Howie argued calmly. "But you have to think to yourself what's best for everyone else." Britney stated softly. "What's best for me is staying clear of Nick when he does this." Howie replied. "Howie, you can't just ignore it and hope it doesn't happen. I'm as much to blame as you for not standing up and saying something about it. If we stay quiet and just back away, someone, it may not be us will get hurt in the end." Kevin disagreed flatly. "Like Brian or Justin." Britney agreed. "I don't think either of you have much of a say to it. You didn't get into a car accident with Nick and you didn't suffer in the hospital and go throug all sorts of shit with him." Howie chastisted them both. "You're right but I've been there to watch other suffer." Britney left the conversaton with her words. Danay watched her walk off towards Joey and she felt for Britney. "When shit happens, you can't be held responsible for others." Howie made his final comment before grabbing Danay's hand and walking away. "Boy is he going to suffer in the end." Kevin heard Irish comment. Kevin turned to face her and nodded. 'Where will this go now?' Kevin thought.

Just Beginning (Chapter 33) Written by JM

Justin let the wind of Orlando float over his body. He sat outside of the offices on the front steps, admiring the cars that sat in the parking lot. He took the night in as his comfort blanket. His thoughts of his husband were never ending. He thought of how his mother came to see him while he sat outside, offering little advice and how Irish was a comfort zone for a few moments. Still both were not enough for Justin at the moment. He looked down to his wedding ring with a frown. 'Did he tarnish everything we held sacred?' Justin thought while looking at the golden ring. 'I love... it's not fair God. My heart forgives him but he can't forgive himself. I hate seeing him like this...' Justin felt as if it was his fault for Brian's continued suffering. His confession only drew in more thoughts and even more frusturation.

Justin began to rub his eyes to make sure he shed no more tears that night. Justin felt the warmth of another's body sit next to him again. 'God who is it this time?' Justin sighed. He looked to his left and saw Brian's face looking out to the parking lot. Justin blinked his eyes to make sure he wasn't just tired and the image of Brian was appearing. When his eyes opened again, Brian was still there, only now staring back at him. "Spoon." Brian whispered. Justin was surprised by his words. "Please spoon me." Brian requested again. Justin scooted near Brian and soon he was hugging Brian.

"I know I fucked up... I know I did majorly Justin." Brian whispered, reaching his arms around to hug Justin. Justin nuzzled his face to Brian's neck. "I love you... that's all that matters." Justin let his forgiveness show easily. "I love you with all of my heart." Brian replied in his gentle, Southern accent. Justin gave Brian a small kiss on the neck. "I'm sorry it happened. I know you feel guilty Brian. I didn't know you were suffering." Justin tried to offer a form of care. "It's okay. I'm the one who did it. I'm the one who hit you and I'll never be able to forget it." Brian replied, letting a single tear express his guilt. "I want you to be able to forget it." Justin replied, lifting his head. Brian nodded. "One day when I know that me and you are both over it, I'll be able to." Brian whispered.

Brian saw Justin's lips forming more words and stopped him by kissing him. Brian slipped his hand behind Justin's head and held their kiss. Justin slide his arms around Brian's neck and continued the soft kiss. Brian let the kiss stay at a slow pace, beaking occassionally for a small breath before returning. Justin tilted his head to enjoy the depth of the kiss. He felt Brian fumbling with a button on his shirt. He didn't bother backing away when the button popped open. Brian ran his tongue over Justin's slowly. He made sure Justin knew it was a kiss of love and not of passion. Justin let his arms unwrap from Brian's neck. He pulled back from the kiss just as Brian undid the second button.

"I love you Snowflake." Justin whispered, putting a finger under Brian's chin. "I love you too my Angel." Brian replied, undoing Justin's third button. Justin grabbed Brian's hands to stop him. He licked his lips and then smiled at Brian. Brian smiled back. Justin held Brian's hands tightly as he sung words from his heart.

As my guardian angel

You are what I want for eternity

The one person who holds my hand

Shows me the meaning of being a man

The angel from just above

I'm never lonely when I have your love

One day we'll have something to share

A family, my angel

Brian was overwhlemed by Justin's sentiment. "I want you to be with me when I raise Angel." Justin softly said. Brian nodded and held Justin's hands. "You believe it's going to happen, right?" Brian asked. "I'm hoping... with faith we'll have a baby next year." Justin replied. Brian agreed. "Let's go home baby." Brian suggested. Justin gleamed for him. "And make an 'Angel'?" Justin asked innocently. Brian stared into his eyes with shyness. "The only way I know how." Brian replied, kissing Justin's lips breifly. They stood and walked to Brian's BMW hand-in-hand.

The morning rose upon Orlando with intensity. The sky dipping up it's favorite ice cream and tossing it among the clouds. The sun was rising to it's heights while the day was a warm one. The morning was a soft dew upon a flower, just showing it's affection to the world.

The doorbell of the Littrell's rang once more. Brian stumbled down the hall towards the door. "Just a sec." Brian called out. He looked down and saw BJ following him. "Hey girl." Brian smiled, bending down to pick up the dog. Brian cuddled the dog and scracthed her head. The doorbell rang once more. 'Oh fuck.' Brian grumbled to himself. "I said I was coming." Brian bellowed at the door. He carried BJ over to the door and swung it open.

Outside of the door was J.C. Chasez. Brian looked at him with surprise. "I hope I didn't interrupt anything... you said you were cumming?" J.C. questioned lowly. Brian saw the shyness in J.C.'s face. "I don't think I'd tell whoever was at the door if me and my husband were making love silly." Brian giggled. J.C. nodded, his eyes drifting to the ground outside. "Is there something you needed J.C.? Did you want to come in or something?" Brian offered, pulling the door open further. J.C. shook his head quickly. Brian gave him an odd look and then stepped outside.

Brian wore a midnight blue T-shirt and a pair of green sweat pants. He took a seat on the stair railing and let BJ roam the front yard. J.C. stayed in his same position, giving off an expression of shame. "Nick slept at Kevin and A.J.'s last night." J.C. said quietly. Brian sighed and looked away from J.C. "So you two broke up?" Brian questioned. "I don't know if we broke up... no we didn't break but I just couldn't bare to be around him after you two kissed." J.C. replied. "I didn't kiss him J.C. Nick kissed me." Brian reminded him. J.C. nodded and lifted his head. "I know you wouldn't betray your husband like that." J.C. sighed out. "Exactly... but Nick was drunk and..." Brian wanted to say something but J.C.'s words interrupted him. "That's the thing Brian, he always fucks up when he's drunk. No one stops him after that first drink and everyone just passes it off in a couple of days. I'm tired of seeing someone I love do that to himself." J.C. fussed, tears beginning to fluster in his eyes. "I know what you mean J.C. I hate seeing Nick drunk and always being sorry for something he's done." Brian agreed. "I don't love him when he's drunk." J.C. hugged himself and stared out to BJ. Brian placed a hand on J.C.'s shoulder for strength.

"I know he doesn't have strong feelings for you anymore. I just feel it in my heart and that's why I don't blame you for what happened last night. But you never jave to worry about Justin waking up with a hang over, Justin doing something stupid the night before or Justin almost breaking up two of your closest friends." J.C. sobbed softly. "But Justin had to worry about me. I know there were times when he just hated me when I used to drink." Brian offered a side of him that he rarely showed, the person who dwelled on the days he spent under alcohol's influence. J.C. looked into Brian's eyes. "I really love him. I mean I loved Lance but I felt only half the time he loved me. Nick... I love him so much and he loves me too. You know? It's just something about him." J.C. confessed. "That makes you feel good when you want to be sad." Brian added onto his words. J.C. nodded. "You understand don't you?" J.C. asked. Brian lifted his left hand and showed J.C. his ring. J.C. gave him a small smile.

"Do you want to go out in the back and talk? Or come inside for some breakfast?" Brian offered, trying to help J.C. as best he could. "I don't know. I'm sure you and Justin are busy." J.C. replied, looking away once again. "No, we're fine. Me and Justin have about an hour before we have to get dressed for church." Brian replied, gazing down at his watch. "Church?" J.C. questioned with a odd smile. "Yep. My baby's taking me and the fam' to church this morning." Brian smiled brightly. "I bet you feel good then." J.C. laughed. Brian nodded happily. "Come on. We'll go inside, make some calls and talk about some things." Brian tried to coax him even more.

Brian stood from the railing and opened the front door. "Come on BJ!" Brian called for the puppy before whistling for her. J.C. shyly walked into the house while Brin grabbed BJ. "We're going to have fun!" Brian chimed, following J.C. inside.

Nick's head bobbed to the sounds of Hole's 'Celebrity Skin' as he pulled into the driveway of the Littrell's. It was late evening, starting to form into the night. Nick's black Mercedes parked behind a familiar red Mercedes. 'Well Nick Carter, let's make everyone smile.' Nick tried to cheer himself up. He stepped out of his car and looked at the several other cars that were surrounding the driveway and some outside of the house. 'Party, party, party!' Nick smiled, walking down the walkway to the front door.

When Nick reached the door, it swung open with Brian greeting him with a smile. "It's about time Mr. Carter." Brian gleamed. "Sorry Rok. I had some things to do." Nick offered his hand to Brian as he stepped inside. They shook hands, exchanging friendly smiles. 'And he seems to have forgotten last night easily.' Nick thought to himself, walking with Brian down the hall. "So where is everyone?" Nick questioned while walking with Brian. "Don't tell me it's a surprise party because you know I'd hate that!" Nick laughed while Brian stayed silent.

They reached the living room to see the Backstreet Boys, 'N Sync, Britney Spears, Nikki DeLoach, Mandy Ashford and Irish Grinstead. Each were sitting in some remote spot of the living room, mingling softly and awaiting the arrival of Nick. Nick and Brian stopped in the doorway of the living room and Nick looked at each when they stared back at him. He saw the serious faces and shameless eyes holding him in his place. "What... why is everyone looking at me like that? Isn't this a party?" Nick smiled at them, feeling nervous with all of the attention on him. "No Nick... it's not." Brian replied, walking into the room. Nick cocked his eyebrow up at Nick. "No drinks? Dancing?" Nick questioned again, catching everyone's eyes. "That's why we're here because you want a drink." Joey replied. "What? We can have Coke, Sprite, Minute Maid, whatever." Nick felt his nervousness build. "Sure, mixed with a little rum, vodka or wine right?" A.J. responded sarcastically. "Hey, I didn't say that, you did." Nick became defensive with the words A.J. used. "But was that what you were thinking?" Kevin questioned. "No!" Nick barked back.

J.C. stood from the seat he held on the couch and walked up to Nick. "Nick... this is an intervention for you." J.C. stated with a slight frown. "A what?!" Nick questioned loudly. "An intervention... this about you and your drinking problem." Joey spoke up again. "I don't have a problem." Nick stared at J.C. when he spoke. "You do Nick." J.C. responded, trying to get closer to him. "A serious one." Kevin added. "Kevin please..." J.C. let his heart be known to Kevin. "Yes Kev. please let my boyfriend tell me how much of an alcoholic he thinks I am." Nick said with heavy sarcasm. J.C. kept his stare with Nick. "You know I love you." J.C. replied solomnly. "Oh yeah, you do. You love me enough to humilate me in front of my friends and call me an alcoholic." Nick let his sarcasm continue without hesitation. "I'm doing this because I don't want to lose you." J.C. argued. "Right. Justin didn't you do this same thing? You know, bring Brian in front of everyone and say to him 'You're a fucking drunk, stop it.'" Nick looked past J.C. to look at Justin. "I didn't have to." Justin replied. "That's right, Brian hitting you was enough. Did it hurt when I hit you Josh?" Nick's eyes went from Justin to J.C. "Look Nick, don't bring me and Brian into this. This is about you." Justin stood from his seat next to Brian. "The hell if it is. Brian started it and now all of you want me to fake sainthood like he's done so you don't have to worry about your image being screwed with." Nick shot back.

"Can we all do this in a calm fashion?" Lance requested from his chair. Nick shook his head quickly. "I'm not going to let each of you pick me apart and say what it is I do good and what it is I do right. It's not even worth my time." Nick replied. He brought his eyes back to J.C. with disgust. Nick swivelled off his promise ring from J.C. and held it up for him. "You said you were my heart." Nick said bitterly. "I am." J.C. let a tear run down his cheek. "Bullshit." Nick disagreed, passing the ring to J.C. "Please don't do this." J.C. requested, trying to force the ring back to Nick. "What if I don't stop drinking?" Nick questioned. "It's either stop or... leave me." J.C. replied with sorrow. Nick shook his head and grabbed the ring. He dropped the ring to the floor with anger. "That's my answer then." Nick snapped.

"It's not that easy Nick." Kevin stood from his chair to look at Nick. J.C. reached for Nick's hand but Nick snatched it away in pure anger. "Don't touch me." he hissed at J.C. J.C. backed away from Nick in fear. "You see Nick, J.C. may have his ultimatum but we have our own. We aren't letting you go that easily. Either you stop drinking or you take some time off from the Backstreet Boys." Kevin stated loud enough for everyone to hear. "What do you mean time off?" Nick folded his arms with his question. "He means either you stop drinking or pack your bags." A.J. bolding said. Nick eyed him in spite. "So that's it right?" Nick questioned, giving Kevin a cold stare. "Those are your choices." Brian replied. "Fuck that. Those aren't choices. There's no give and take in that, just take." Nick disagreed. "It's for our good." Kevin gave a soft response. "For your image is more like it. Sure, you can have a guy who's married to a guy, a guy who got his girlfriend, not wife but girlfriend pregnant but you can't have a drunk because that's just too extreme." Nick barked. "We can't have dead members." A.J. said in his raspy tone. "Who says I'm dead?" Nick asked arrogantly. J.C. shook his head and walked by to his seat. "That's the road you're headed Nick." Chris replied for everyone. "Isn't that for God to decide, not you?" Nick hissed. "I prefer that not be an option." Kevin answered.

"Listen Nick, me and you have never been on the best of terms. It's just always been like that but even I don't want to see you leave the Backstreet Boys over something like this." Justin tried to approach Nick. "Sure, you'd prefer them kick me out for trying to sleep with your husband right?" Nick grumbled. "That has nothing to do with it. You're Brian's closest friend and he doesn't want to lose you to drinking. He gave it up and you can too." Justin stated. "That's funny... he almost started up last night." Nick commented, looking over to Brian.

"Please Nick, don't try and make Brian and Justin look like they've done something wrong. They've fought tooth and nail to stay together after many of your drunken nights. They're just here to help you just like I am." Mandy approached Nick. Nick looked at her with little sincerity. "Mandy, it doesn't look that way to me. They give me a choice of either stop doing something I like to do for fun or leave something that I've dedicated my life to." Nick explained his side to her. "I understand Nick, I do. Still, would you give J.C. up for something you like to do for fun?" Mandy pointed towards J.C. as she spoke. Nick gave J.C. a swift look and then turned to face Mandy. "He's giving up on me." Nick answered softly, letting his heart break in small pieces. "He's not. He's fighting for the man he loves." Mandy stated.

"Why don't we set up a thirty day program. Thirty days without alcohol will help make him a better person and then maybe he won't want any later on." Lance suggested. "No, the terms are not negotiable." Kevin snapped. "Right. It's either all or none." A.J. agreed. "But how's that helping him? You're just driving him to hurt himself more. And for what? So he won't kiss Brian again?" Lance pointed out powerful points to the others. "My Lord you're a dumb broad." Lance heard Irish's distinct voice say towards him. "Now Irish, let's be a little bit more adult." Joey suggested. "How can we? Listen to Lance. He just wants things to run smoothly when you've got stubborn Nick over here who has the potential to do anything drunk. Yet Lance wants him to go with a slap on the wrist? Don't even play yourself. A slap on the wrist doesn't do anyone any good. It's when you finally get the ass whipping you deserve that makes you think." Irish pointed out for Lance. "And it's also the thing that makes you resent the other person." Lance gripped with her. "And is that what you're so worried about? Poor Nick not liking you anymore? He's just your ex-boyfriend, not your husband." Irish argued. "He's someone that means alot to me." Lance shouted at her. Irish rolled her eyes at him and backed away.

"You're putting yourself right back where you were so long ago Lansten. That place where you defend Nick for the stupid things he does and let him get away with it." Justin stated, looking at Lance with contempt. "Look Justin, you never had Nick steal your boyfriend. You never had them both get drunk and fuck and then you find them the next day in the shower. You never saw what I saw that day and if Nick fucks up again, let him. He deserves what he gets but I'm not going to let another one of you fucking suffer like I did. Holding him back will do that!" Lance barked at Justin, tears breaking his green eyes. "I guess you don't remember what happened to me? How Nick tried so hard to seduce Brian? How he did it all when he was drunk!" Justin argued. "But he never got Brian." Lance hissed. "No... but you'll never know what me and Brian went through Lance. None of you ever will." Justin shook his head in shame at Lance. He walked passed Lance and to where Nikki stood, feeling he could not be around Brian or Nick at the moment.

"So am I at fault again?" Nick asked, mocking Justin. "No, you're not. I am." Brian responded, looking at Justin. "I didn't say you were." Justin disagreed. "In little ways you did Just." Brian argued softly. "No I didn't. I'm simply saying what I feel about the way things have been." Justin snapped. "And you're saying I've screwed up and I'm still screwing up. But get this Justin, I don't want your husband." Nick barked sorely. "And no one said you did." Brian added, eyeing Justin. "So I guess now the blames on me?" Justin questioned bitterly. Nikki watched with a sharp eye. "Now I didn't say that." Brian chastised Justin. "But it was implied." Justin replied, rolling his eyes at Brian. "Sure, putting words in my mouth makes it implied. Just because you're a little jelous of Nick at times makes it hard but this is about Nick's drinking problems, not what he's done to me and you in the past." Brian hissed. Justin gripped his fists. "So he and you were sober the night you almost slept with him?" Justin let his last words hit everyone before he walked out of the living room.

Howie gazed over to his right to see J.C. resting his head on the edge of the couch, letting his tears fall. Howie reached his arm over and pulled on J.C. "Hey amigo, it's gonna be okay." he whispered to J.C. Howie pulled J.C. into a small hug so that J.C. could let the tears out. Howie knew that J.C. was in need of a release and he was going to help him. He petted J.C.'s hair and rubbed his cheeks. "Just go ahead and cry... maybe that'll show him how much you're hurting." Howie whispered, coaxing J.C.'s sobs.

A.J. watched Howie and J.C. with extreme aggravation. He didn't like seeing his friends come together against Nick but he hated that they were all being torn apart because of Nick's stubborness. He walked past Kevin to stand in front of Nick. "Oh what do you have to say?" Nick asked, tiffed by A.J.'s stare. "Why do you have to act like this? Why do you have to act like a child? You're fucking nineteen, not nine. You have a lot better sense then this. We shouldn't have to take care of you all of the time." A.J. grumbled at Nick. "Yeah, whatever." Nick rolled his eyes at A.J. "No, not whatever. What does your family think? Do you think this is an okay thing to do? You're drinking and doing you're friends wrong. That shit ain't cool, it's just not cool. You've got more sense Nick. Look at you. You're handsome, you're smart and you've got life waiting for you on a platter. But instead you're ordering left over's. And for what? You could have a lot of things in life... a great man, a family, friends and the love of your fans. But ithis is not cool. It's not cool when you drink and fuck things up. You've just gotta stop. Just stop. Please, just stop." A.J. pleaded with his statements. Nick gave him a troubled look, letting his guard down slightly for the words A.J. spoke. "Don't act like this." A.J. begged of Nick.

Nick quickly turned from A.J. so that no one could see a tear leave his eye. "And are you leaving?" Chris asked, standing. "Chris don't." Joey grabbed Chris's arm. Chris yanked away from Joey swiftly. "Is that how it works for you? We say some nice things and then you just what? Go? Run home?" Chris became louder with his words. The sound troubled Nikki, causing her to leave the sight of the feuding friends. "He didn't say he was running." Joey spoke up for Chris. "It sure looks like it to me. What's wrong Nick? You don't like the choice you've been given?" Chris began to mock Nick. "I like it just fine. It's either Nick give up the life you lead or Nick give up the man you love and your friends. Tough choice right? Or is there a choice?" Nick snapped back, turning to face Chris. "It's either live or die when it comes to alcohol Nick." Chris argued. "Funny, I didn't know I got a choice." Nick sarcastically answered.

"I think you do and everyone's not giving you that oppurtunity." Mandy replied. "I think we gave him a prtty oppurtune chance to straighten up." Kevin shot back to her. "And did he know he was on trial?" Mandy questioned Kevin. "Does it matter?" Howie pondered. "I guess it would a little huh?" Mandy let her own sarcasm into the circle. "If he knew then he could have easily put on a mask to show he's just fine and dandy." Howie bellowed. "And if he knew maybe he wouldn't feel so locked in huh?" Mandy argued. "He's got a choice." Howie stated. "Now much of a fair one." Lance disagreed. "Life isn't fair but neither is suffering." A.J. argued. "But you're making him suffer more than you have to." Lance replied.

"Were you in the car when Nick crashed it?" Howie brought up a powerful point. "And did you have to look at Howie, J.C. and Brian when they were locked in?" A.J. added. "And did you stop Nick after the first beer that night?" Brian questioned. Lance soon felt the eyes floating on him. "Were any of you there when Nick felt the guilt of what he did?" Lance shot back.

"You dumb broad!" Irish shouted, losing patience with Lance. "Irish, calm down." Brian advised. "I'm sorry Brian. I know with me not being around the rest of you as much as others I don't know everything but I know a stupid person when I see one." Irish turned to Brian with her words. "How can you call me stupid?" Lance barked at her. "Look at yourself. You're standing up for Nick every five seconds as if he was your twin or something. He's not Lance. He's just Nick. He's hurt you just like the others. Don't say he hasn't because he has. I can tell from what I've seen tonight. Standing up for him is one thing but acting as his sheild is just being a dumb broad. Because in the end Lance, you're standing with nothing." Irish stated. Lance was thrown by her off set attitude. "He'll have a friend." Nick spoke up in Lance's defense. "And will that be any good to him when he loses his other friends?" Britney questioned.

"Nick, you won't have a friend when all of this is over." Brian spoke up breifly. Nick's eyes wandered to Brian with suspicion. "You don't know what I've gone through for you. What I've been through to stand up for you. I've faught for you until I couldn't anymore. Hell I even put my marriage on the line for you but I can't anymore. If you want to stay drunk, fine. You can do that. You can lose the Backstreet Boys and you can lose J.C. but you'll lose me regardless. Justin means the world to me and when he had to see me in the hospital because you put me there, it was too much. And when I almost let myself go for you, that was the back breaker. This is just adding to the pain. But I can't take it anymore. I've watched you fuck things up for yourself but I'm not going to watch my marriage end." Brian stated with a powerful voice. Nick began to shiver with the lose. "I mean Nick I want a family. I want my son or daughter to have many uncles that he can go to. But I won't have my child worry of seeing a drunk uncle on holidays or having my child have to watch me and Justin argue over you. I can't let that happen." Brian added. Nick saw no room for him to interupt Brian's speech. "Until you can learn what sober means and take the higher road like I did, it'll be just Frack and no Frick." Brian laid his own ultimatum down with the others. Brian walked out of the room with his frown.

"How can all of you do this? You're not giving me a choice here. You're making me lose everything I've loved because of a drink." Nick whimpered out, his tears slicing his cheeks. "That's not what we want Nick." Britney argued. "Yes it is! You want me to lose everything or give up something that's a mild factor in my life." Nick argued. "If it was a mild factor, then you could let it go easily." Joey disagreed. "I can fucking let it go!" Nick shouted. J.C. couldn't look at Nick in the state he was showing. "Then for everyone, just do it." Britney pleaded. Nick looked at the ground, watching each tear slide off his chin to the floor. "For all of us." Kevin added. Nick watched another tear fall. "For your family." Mandy said. Another tear fell. "For the Backstreet Boys." A.J. begged. A tear. "For me." J.C. whispered. No tear fell.

Nick looked up and saw J.C.'s face looking towards him. He was at a lose for breath. He felt a lump in his throat swell. "I... I'll do it." Nick finally answered all of his friends. Slow and steady exhales filled the room, letting loose relief. "Come on Nick, we'll talk about the official rules of this game." Kevin suggested, placing his arm around Nick for comfort. Nick nodded and followed Kevin, not looking back to the faces that had plagued him for two hours.

Just Beginning (Chapter 34) Written by JM

"So where's the not-so-happy couple?" A.J. tried to move the subject matter in a different direction. "Uhm, they are in the laundry room... uh, making up. They requested not to be bothered." Nikki replied as she entered the room. Britney giggled when she saw Nikki's expression. "Hey Howie, Kodak time!" A.J. chimed. Howie bursted into laughter upon the couch. Irish shook her head at both.

"Maybe we should go. We leave for New York in two days." Joey suggested, standing up. "Oh yes, the joys of the MTV Video Music Awards!" Chris cheered. "Yahoo." Howie grumbled. "This coming from the group that is up for four awards?" Chris brooded. "You're up for four too." Howie reminded them. "Yes, joy! We're up against ya'll in three and Ricky Martin in four. The odds aren't good." Joey shook his head. "And what about Britney?" Britney mocked each of them. "Oh yes, Miss Spears is up for how many again?" A.J. questioned. "Three actually." Britney cheered. "Ooh!" Joey and Chris cooed to mock her. Britney slapped Joey's thigh while eyeing Chris. "Don't knock her, we're only up for one." Irish stated.

"I just want Viewer's Choice." Chris commented. "Uhm, we want Viewer's Choice." A.J. added. "No gents, I WANT Viewer's Choice." Britney smiled. "Care to make a little bet?" Howie looked at each. "I've got twenty on TLC." Nikki replied. "Okay, twenty on 'N Sync." Joey answered. "Twenty for Korn." Chris added. "I want twenty on myself." Britney chimed. "I'll put twenty down on Backstreet." A.J. nodded. "What does that leave me with? Ricky Martin?" Howie gave an odd look. Each began to laugh at him. "What the hell, twenty on the Loca guy." Howie shrugged. "Actually Ricky Martin isn't up for that award, Limp Bizkit is and I've got twenty on them." Mandy smiled. Howie sinked at her and then turned to the others. "You heard the lady, she's got the 'Nookie' boys." Howie announced.

"I wonder who's bringing who as a date?" Joey questioned, looking around before stopping on Britney. "I'm attending alone." Britney replied lowly. "What?!" Joey got loud with his question. "Yeah, the label says it's best for now since MTV's doing so much damn coverage on me and all. So I just figured it'd be okay because we had broke up." Britney replied with her Southern drawl. "But we're back together." Joey wined. "I know and I'll see you at after parties and we'll be together in New York but they already have me set up for no date." Britney responded. Joey grumbled and looked around.

"Well I can't take Meelah, so we'll double." Chris smiled. "And why's that?" A.J. asked, reclining in his seat. "Something about not letting it go public yet." Chris shrugged. "Then take Mandy." Howie suggested. Chris looked at Mandy who smiled back. "All right, Mandy?" Chris offered. Mandy nodded happily. "A free trip to New York I can do." Mandy giggled. "And that way Meelah doesn't have to worry too much about people hunting her down." Irish giggled.

"Well Nikki?" A.J. turned to Nikki with wonder. "Well what?" she questioned back. "Is Kevin escorting you?" A.J. pondered. "Well yes he is." Nikki chimed. "Good, at least one Backstreet Boy can claim the one they love that night." A.J. sighed. "No Amanda?" Irish asked. "Nope. With her being four months, we can't afford it. So she'll be there but sitting with others." A.J. exhaled. "That's sad." Irish agreed. "Oh well. Brian can't be with Justin and Nick can't be with J.C. So I guess it's not all bad." A.J. shrugged. "Does Brian have to take Leigh Ann still?" Howie asked A.J. Irish's eyes bugged with the question. "I don't think so. I think the label called that off with the last stint she pulled but she is going to be sitting near us just in case." A.J. explained. "But why?!" Britney asked with anger. "Because of everything in the news with Brian and Justin. With Justin leaving the tour, there were rumors and what not so we have to keep it close and safe. But she won't be his 'official' date or anything." A.J. stated. "That's messed up." Irish grumbled. "Tell it to Brian and Justin." Howie sighed.

"What about you Lance?" Mandy questioned her friend. Lance looked over to each with wonder. "I can't take Bryce, so I don't know." Lance replied sorely. "Why would you want to take him?" Joey laughed. Lance realized that Chris was still the only friend that knew of what sort of relationship Bryce and Lance were beginning to build. He became cautious with his words. "I have friends from Mississippi coming up... so maybe I'll grab one of them for my date. Or maybe I'll call Josh's friend from England... Craig." Lance shrugged. "You can't take a guy silly." Britney smiled. "And you can't take Craig." J.C. became defensive with the name. Lance rolled his eyes at J.C. and left it at that. "Maybe Danay will go with you." Nikki suggested, teasing Howie. "She's coming with me." Howie insisted. Nikki nodded falsely.

"Well it's getting late anyways guys. We've got things to do." A.J. yawned out. "Going home to see your babies?" Chris questioned. A.J. nodded with a huge grin. He pulled his keys out and waved to all of his friends before leaving. "We've got to go." Irish reminded Chris. Irish stood with Chris and they both walked out together. "Yeah, we've got things to do." Britney agreed, grabbing Joey's hand. "Oooh, 'things'?" Joey cooed. Britney quickly elbowed him in the side. "No." Britney said in aggravation. "Aaaww, no nookie." Joey complained. Britney groaned and walked with him. "I worry about you guys sometimes." Mandy snickered, walking with them.

J.C. stood and looked back to where the ring still laid on the floor. "I'll give you a ride home." Howie offered, putting an arm around J.C.'s shoulders. J.C. sighed and nodded. "It's not over you know." Howie whispered to him. Howie once again offered his comforting words. "I think it is." J.C. said softly. He let the ring stay in it's spot as he and Howie exited the Littrell's house.

New York had a steady movement and flow to it's new found fame. With celebrities coming into town for the Video Music Awards, everyone tried to grab a piece of the city. MTV basked in the glow of it's publicity as Carson Daly tapped another round of TRL the day before the grand event. "Right now before we get to our number eight video, we're going to head over to the Metropolitan Opera House where Dave Holmes is standing by with Backstreet Boy Brian Littrell. Dave?" Carson spoke up, trying to hear Dave through his earpiece.

"Hey Carson, this is Dave Holmes and I'm standing here with a Backstreet Boy himself, Mr. Brian Littrell." Dave said with a smile, pointing out the cheesing Brian. Brian waved to the camera. "So Brian, you guys just got done rehearsing not too long ago for your performance for the show. It looks really great even though your set isn't ready, are you guys excited?" Dave questioned, holding his mic to Brian. "Oh yes! I mean it's MTV, it's the Video Music Awards and it's the last of the century. That's the way to go," Brian nodded with his reply. "Now you guys are performing at the Awards. Any jitters about that?" Dave asked curiously. "Not really. We've got this down even though we had like one day to rehearse for it because of our schedules. But it's really cool though because we know what we're doing and this song is fun to perform." Brian replied with assurness. "Now I don't want to kill any surprises, but you guys are performing your hit 'The One', right?" Dave asked. Brian nodded, not giving a verbal reply. "Anything you'd like to share about it?" Dave pondered. "No, I won't ruin it for the fans but it's going to be fun. Just watch." Brian answered. "Okay, that we will. Now MTV is trying to be really unique for this show. They tried to get you guys, the Backstreet Boys, and 'N Sync to perform together right?" Dave questioned, trying to remember all the facts he had been pumped with moments earlier. "Well not actually that. They wanted me and Justin of 'N Sync to perform the song we recorded together. But since the Backstreet Boys are already performing in their own set, I couldn't fit it in. So it's not happening. I'd love to perform with Justin but it's just a conflict of interest right now." Brian explained. "Ah okay. Well you guys are up for four awards, anyone you want the most?" Dave asked. "Nah, not really. Any would be good actually. I'm sure the guys would like Viewer's Choice or maybe Best Pop Video, but to me it doesn't matter. I just wanna have fun." Brian replied. He looked around to see Howie and Fatima walk by him.

"Okay... now I won't ask if the performance between you and Justin was cancelled because of all the rumors and noise in the tabloids, but what's the deal with 'N Sync changing to Jive Records? Does that affect you?" Dave tried to make his curiosity mild. "It doesn't affect me personally or the Backstreet Boys directly really. I'm actually in support of it because we're all basically family now and it won't hurt any of us. There's no competition, it's just whoever wins wins for us. So I'm happy with it." Brian replied honestly. "Okay, very cool. Well thank you for talking with us Brian. We're going to try and catch up with Howie and Fatima Robinson who just went by plus Britney Spears, TLC, Trent Reznor and 'N Sync who is about to practice for the show. I hear that's going to be an interesting performance. Excited about seeing it?" Dave questioned Brian once more. "Yep. I get to go watch it right now actually while they practice." Brian chimed. "Ooh, lucky you. Back to you Carson." Dave put on a false face for the camera.

Brian shook hands with Dave Holmes as he chased down Howie and Fatima and Brian took a route down the opposite direction. Brian walked down the long aisles of the Opera House to see people prepping the stage for 'N Sync's pre-dress rehearsal. Brian peeked up to the stage and saw his husband walking around the broad stage. "Can I get in on the action?!" Brian requested loudly. Justin peered at Brian from the stage and smiled. "Anytime!" Justin called back.

Brian watched as workers ran around recklessly all over the Opera House. He avoided each and made his way closer to the stage. "Are you guys set for tomorrow?" Brian's voice got lower when he reached the stage. Justin nodded for him. "Go get a mic." Chris said as he ran by Justin. Justin sighed, seeing that he would not have much time for his husband. "It's okay, go ahead. I've got more rehearsing to do with the guys backstage anyway." Brian assured him. Justin gave another loud sigh. He looked down at Brian's innocent blue eyes. He winked at Brian and then mouthed the words, 'I love you baby'. Brian smiled back at him. 'I love you too.' Brian mouthed back. Brian knew that even the spotlights of the stage couldn't be as bright as Justin's smile at that minute. "This is a closed set for 'N Sync's performance, everyone clear the way!" a producer called out. Brian moved back and waved to Justin. Justin waved back before running behind the curtains to prep' for the rehearsal. Brian made his way down the long stretchway towards the dressing area.

"Okay, this is Dave Holmes and I'm here with actor Matt Thompson." Dave smiled, looking to his left to see Matt. "Hey, what's up, Dave?" Matt lifted his mic to his mouth with a smile. "Just doing interviews like a mad man." Dave laughed. "We're all pretty busy, aren't we?" Matt replied with a smile. "You know it. So, what are you going to wear the night of the awards?" Dave asked. "Isn't that a question reserved for the women?" Matt laughed. "I'm struggling here, give me a hand, man." Dave laughed along. "Jeez. I think it's Armani. My manager, Barbara hooked me up with what I'm going to wear. I don't really keep on top of that." Matt smiled. "Sounds like you're keeping hip then?" Dave commented. "Ofcourse. That's what I'm here for. I'm a fashion plate." Matt giggled. "You're going to be presenting an award, right?" Dave asked, changing the topic. "Right. I'll be presenting the Viewer's Choice Award with Alanis Morissette, whom I LOVE, and Mark McGrath." Matt spoke into his mic. "Are you nervous about that?" Dave pondered. "Are you kidding?!?! I've had diarrhea for the last week thinking about it!" Matt teased. "Too much info there, Matt." Dave teased.

"Who are you looking forward to seeing perform?" Dave asked. Matt smiled back, and lifted his mic again. "Well, I'm a big Alanis advocate, so her ofcourse. Backstreet Boys always put on a great show, so I'm looking forward to seeing them, as well as 'N Sync, Britney Spears, and I'm dying to see TLC perform." Matt answered. "I think TLC is going to be a big favorite at the show." Dave replied. "Definitely, it's been WAY too long since they've been at the VMA's. And after all the heartache and trials they've been through, and coming back, it's really great to see a success story like that." Matt explained. "Ofcourse. Who do you see winning the Viewer's Choice Award, Matt?" Dave continued. "Well, I'm sort of pulling for TLC for the same reason, but I think it's going to be the Backstreet Boys." Matt smiled. "Why them?" Dave dug for an answer. "Oh come on, they're like the All American Boys right now. Everyone loves them. They appeal to a large fanbase." Matt replied quickly. "Are you bringing a date?" Dave asked. "Nah. I'm going to be going solo." Matt grinned. "Ah, why no date?" Dave smiled. "Well, I figure if I'm going to hit the post-show parties that I want my options to be open, right?" Matt laughed loudly. "Right, can't bring a date if you plan on flirting." Dave laughed along. "Exactly. I don't want anyone cramping my style. It'll be hard for me to, um, get jiggy wit' it -- as the kids say, if I have someone on my arm." Matt laughed again. "Which parties are you going to hit after the awards?" Dave questioned. "The MTV after show party, ofcourse." Matt faked surprise. "That's what I wanted to hear." Dave laughed. "I wouldn't miss that for the world, now." Matt giggled. "Well, Matt, I really appreciate you taking the time to let me interview you." Dave wrapped up the interview. "No problem. Anytime." Matt smiled, sincerely. "Thanks again." Dave reached out and shook Matt's hand, then turned to look into the camera.

A pair of blue eyes watched Matt walked back towards the main lobby, suspicously eyeing him. 'So you are going to be here Matt Thompson. Very interesting.' the owner of the eyes thought. 'I wonder what that'll mean come time for...' the eyes drifted away from Matt when they saw Dave Holmes crusing by looking for more interviews. 'Uh oh... time to go.' the owner of the eyes decided, moving away.

Fatima stood backstage chatting with Justin as Dave came trotting by. "Well if it isn't Fatima Robinson and Justin Timberlake." Dave chimed. Fatima looked at Justin before breaking into laughter. "Am I a part of some inside joke?" Dave questioned with a smile. Justin looked at Fatima with question. "I'm sorry. It was just something you said that was funny to me." Fatima excused herself, still having the giggles. Justin thought over what Dave said before smiling. He had caught onto Dave saying 'Justin Timberlake' when Justin knew he was now 'Justin Littrell'. "Well I wanted to know if I could hit you guys up for a segment for TRL? We're about to go on in about one minute." Dave requested, trying to stay chipper for the two. "I'd like to BUT I've got a little more rehearsing to do with the guys and some talking to do with management. So I can't... but I'm sure Fatima here can talk with you. She loves to gab." Justin informed them before giving Fatima a sleek smile. "If you're not careful, I might bad mouth you little boy." Fatima giggled, scratching her hands through his curls. "Eh! I'm out of here!" Justin laughed, signaling his exit.

"Dave... you're on in about thirty seconds." the producer informed Dave, stepping back. Dave turned to Fatima with a puzzled expression. "Okay Mr. Holmes, I can give you five minutes." Fatima replied to his non-verbal request. Dave smiled as they beamed the spotlight on the two. "Hey Carson. I've got non other than the Backstreet Boys and occassionally Britney Spears, 'N Sync, Aaliyah, Master P, Will Smith and the list goes on... famed choreographer, Miss Fatima Robinson." Dave got chipper for the camera. Fatima waved to the camera. "Now Fatima, we're backstage here at the wonderful Metropolitan Opera House for the MTV Video Music Awards. Now you're here because we here it you're choreographing not one but TWO performances tomorrow night?" Dave began with his simple question. "Yes... I'm going the Backstreet Boys' performance and then I'm working with 'N Sync also." Fatima answered into the held out microphone. "Very cool. That'd be the 'N Sync and Britney Spears performance..." before Dave could finish all of his words, Fatima slapped her hand over his mouth. "Don'truin the surprise boy!" Fatima laughed. Dave nodded and backed away. "Wow, now that's a surprise for you. Fatima keeping the secret that I just spilled." Dave tried to joke on the situation. "Well now you've gone and spilled it." Fatima rolled her eyes at him. "Okay... but there are many more surprises in store for the big night. Especially with the 'N Sync performance and others." Dave assured the viewers. Fatima nodded, still angered that Dave had let 'the cat out of the bag'.

"So what are you wearing? Who are you looking forward to seeing?" Dave shot out more questions. "It's funny because I still don't know what I'm going to wear," Fatima giggled. "I've been so busy with things that I can't even decide. I mean with only having a day to work with the Backstreet Boys... only having maybe less than a day and then a few hours to work with 'N Sync, it's been hard. But I mean all ten of those boys have been putting their all into rehearsal time and I think they've got it down. They catch on really quickly to what I want." Fatima explained. "Well you've been working with the Backstreet Boys for what? Four or five years?" Dave pondered. "Five years now... almost six. It's been really cool too because they know what I expect and want now and sometimes they'll even throw their own ideas into the mix and make the dances even better. So I love working with them." Fatima answered. "Well you're going to be at the awards not only for the performances but you're actually up for awards." Dave pointed out. "Uh huh. I'm like the Susan Lucci of the MTV Awards... I've had so many nominations and never a win. This year I'm up with Aaliyah and I really want to win this time." Fatima replied, letting loose her feelings on the subject. "You've done a lot of great videos." Dave commented. "And no wins! I'm like Mariah... maybe with the new stuff I've got going I can get more nominations. But you know, I feel like Mariah. Can I get a stinking MTV award? I don't want a Grammy, I want an MTV!" Fatima laughed out. "That's cool. Do you know if you'll be working with the Backstreet Boys for their next tour?" Dave tried to become more intellectual with his questions. "Actually... I just got a call from their management the other day and they said that I'll be working with them in less than a month for a tour theiy are supposed to be doing from October to early December. So I'll be working with them again. Plus we're about to do another video before they go on tour that'll be set for like a Christmas release." Fatima stated.

Dave listened to her every word and saw a familiar person begin to walk by. "And well hey, there goes none other than Howie Dorough... a Backstreet Boy." Dave quickly stopped Howie. Howie became hesitant about his next step before walking over to Fatima and Dave. Fatima pulled Howie into a hug with a smile. "Hey Howie." Dave broke up their hug. Howie waved to Dave, staying relatively quiet. "Now I talked with Brian earlier and he said that you guys would probably like to win the award for Viewer's Choice. Now you guys are up for four, which do you want?" Dave threw out his first question. "Well Viewer's Choice would be nice but I think I want Video of the Year. I mean that's a big honor right there. You know? With winning that, it makes you know that hard work does pay off." Howie replied. "And surely it'd be a great one to win. 'The One' was a well loved song by MTV viewer's and the world. It was the number one single?" Dave tried to recall. "For three weeks, yep. So I mean I know we're up against tough competition but it'd still be cool to win." Howie answered. "That's a big honor." Fatima agreed. "But you know I would have liked for us to be up for Best Dance Video because this video did have pletny dancing in it and we could give props to Fatima for it too." Howie added. "Yes it would be cool to have that nomination. Unfortunately people like Ricky Martin, Britney Spears, Jordan Knight and 'N Sync took that one. Are you exciting about performing?" Dave asked. Howie gave him a small nod. "It's going to be fun." Fatima nudged Howie. "I'm sure it will be." Dave gave an unsure agreement.

"You guys have a new video coming out Monday, right? For 'Don't Wanna Lose You Now'." Dave changed the subject easily. "Yes... that's a cool video I think." Howie commented. "Now this isn't a big dance video like 'The One' was." Dave added. "No... it's a ballad but I think a ballad that alot of guys and girls can relate to." Howie replied. "So no work from Fatima with dancing and all?" Dave looked at both Howie and Fatima with his question. "No, no dancing in this one. We didn't get to work woth Fatima for this one. And plus it wasn't one of those things where we had time to go into the studio and work on dance moves. We shot it in a day and then special effects and what not were edited in the following week." Howie explained. "Okay, so just you guys right?" Dave tried to reassure the answer. "Yeah just the guys in the group, no dancers or anything." Howie agreed. "Well I'm sure they fans will love it." Dave nodded. Howie glared down to his watch, trying to see if the time would be permited.

"But they'll be dancing in the next video they're shooting." Fatima added onto Howie's previous words. "Oh really? What's the next single after this one?" Dave questioned. "We're going with 'Larger Than Life'. It'll sort of be a Christmas present for our fans... to let the know they made our lives HUGE this year for us." Howie stated with a ginger smile. "That'll be nice. Very unique idea." Dave commented. "We've got different things hitting for that song that I have worked out." Fatima added. "Like? I mean show us some moves... the sleek stuff you give the Backstreet Boys and all." Dave coaxed her. Fatima thought for a minute. "Well okay, we've got some pop-locking we're going to do. Stuff I think the kids will like." Fatima replied. She stepped back and began to do some moves for the cameras, showing off her natural dancing ability. She and Howie laughed when she finished.

"Well listen, thanks for talking with us guys. We know that you're both very busy preparing and all so we'll let you go." Dave said, turning to the camera. Howie gave a small sigh of relief and backed away from the camera. "Have you seen Nick or Justin?" Howie whispered to Fatima. Fatima turned her head to look at him. "I was just talking to Justin... he had more practicing to do on stage I believe." Fatima responded softly. Howie nodded and shook her hand. He walked off in a rush while Fatima waited around the area.

The evening was beginning to pour over New York City. Rehearsals were still going strong within the Metropolitan Opera House, yet people were growing sheepish and weary. Britney Spears sat in one of the theater-like steas near the back of the auditorium. She watched as crew members began to clear the area for Jay Z to rehearse a final set. Her eyes turned as T.J. and Andre played around nearby and her publicist coorodinated for her to do more interviews. She ran her hair through her pinned up hair and looked back to where MTV staff were setting up another interview, this time for her. 'Damn Britney, you need your rest.' Britney complained to herself. She sighed and looked at T.J. who was smiling brightly at her. "Don't act like you don't wanna run around here like us." T.J. teased her. "Don't I wish I could." Britney complained.

"Okay Britney... we're ready for you now." Dave informed her. She sighed and stood. "Smile baby!" Shawn called out to her. Britney faked a smile for him and then walked up to the area that had set up for her. 'Okay Britney... make the fans happy.' Britney coaxed herself. She stood next to Dave Holmes with a small smile, sporting a full Gap outfit with tight red shirt, black jeans and a silver vest. "Well everyone I'm standing her next to Pop's reigning Queen, Miss Britney Spears." Dave introduced her in his flamboyant way. Britney smiled and said, "Hello everyone." "Now Britney, you're here for the MTV Awards. In fact you're performing. We actually let the people know at home earlier today that you are in fact performing with pop group, 'N Sync." Dave said, looking directly into the camera. "Yes... uh, I'm performing with 'N Sync which was sort of going to be a surprise. But I guess it's out now. Anyway, I'm performing with them and I think it'll be a lot of fun." Britney replied in her peppery tone. "Any hints onto what's going to be going on?" Dave picked her something. "Nope, I can't say. I just think it's going to be cool that I'm performing with them and all." Britney answered.

"Well now you toured with them and the Backstreet Boys. Anybody you would prefer work with or perform with?" Dave questioned. Britney shook her head. "I think both groups are really cool and nice... they're very talented. I've gotten a chance to actually work with boy groups, with the 'N Sync album and we've all performed live together too. So I mean it's cool." Britney stated. "Cool. Is there anyone else you want to see perform?" Dave pondered. "You mean like at the show?" Britney looked for a definite question. "Yeah, I meant at the awards." Dave corrected himself. "Yeah... I mean wow. I've gotten to see some of the rehearsals and I'm really looking forward to this. I think though I really want to see TLC perform... I just like they're sound and the way they perform. I'm looking forward to seeing Eminem perform... I want to meet him too and I haven't gotten the chance to yet. But yeah, him and TLC." Britney replied. "Oh yeah... I heard TLC's performance is going to be hot. But no Ricky Martin or Backstreet Boys?" Dave tried to point out the obvious. "Well I mean I've seen the Backstreet Boys perform before. They're really good. As for like Ricky Martin... I don't know. I'd love to meet him but TLC and Eminem would be cooler to see perform live. You know? They have an image about them." Britney responded with slight confusion.

"That's true. What about with 'N Sync joining your label. Is that how it came to be that they are performing with you?" Dave asked, remembering his notes. "Actually no. That happened more recently and doesn't have a direct effect on us performing together." Britney answered intelligently. "Okay. Is there a big fight or what not over the fact that 'N Sync is now going to be on your label, Jive Records?" Dave asked, looking into her solemn brown eyes. "A fight? No... not at all. It doesn't bother me at all that they are joining and I'm sure it doesn't bother other acts either. It's all a matter of business and how much attention you get from your label. Nothing to get upset about." Britney explained. "So there won't be any further problems?" Dave questioned. "There never has been problems but with 'N Sync joining Jive, I doubt it." Britney assured him. "Good. Maybe a Jive Pop Tour is in plans? With 'N Sync, the Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears?" Dave suggested with a tease. Britney shook her head at him. "Maybe." she raised her mic to speak.

"Now MTV did a segment with you for the awards pre-show, right? What was that like?" Dave continued to question Britney. "Oh it was fun. Yeah, me and... Serena, yeah, we went out and shopped for hours. It was really cool and then I had to come here and rehearse for the performance. But it was still very cool to be out in New York shopping. I love to shop." Britney said in a bubbly tone. "I like shopping too. Did you buy a lot of things?" Dave asked. Britney thought over the many things she bought, including a Superman hat for Joey and a new baby toy for Brian and Justin. "Yeah, I did. I got stuff from Tommy, Cynthia Rawley, Armani, Todd Oldman and others. It was cool." Britney replied after her moment of thinking. "That's wonderful. We hear through the grapevyne you're working on a new album?" Dave saw the producer's cue for the question. "Uhm, sort of. We're in a pre-production like stage even though I have done like six songs for the album. I want to do about twenty songs so I have a broad angle to pick and choose from." Britney nodded. "Anybody special you are going to work with, want to work with or have worked with?" Dave asked the usual. "Well I want to work with Madonna actually. I LOVE her so much and I... I think it'd be cool if she wrote a song or recorded with me." Britney cooed. "I am actually set to work with Missy Elliott again next week. We already did one song and the label thought it'd be cool if we did another one. See I did this one song with her rapper named Mocha, which I really like. I might make that song a single." Britney added happily.

"Anyone else?" Dave purged. "Yeah... I want to work with Lauryn Hill on a song. We've been calling her people. And I'd like to like record something with 98 Degrees, the Backstreet Boys or 'N Sync. That'd be a lot of fun for me to do. Maybe 702 too. I just recorded a Diane Warren song called 'If I Had A Reason'. Then I did this really cool song with Max Martin called 'Bubble Gum Love'... oh AND I worked with A.J. of Backstreet... and Justin from 'N Sync on a song called 'Let You Go'. That's going to be a cool song people hear because Justin and A.J. wrote that song. I like it alot. It's on a soundtrack coming out soon too." Britney stated, listing people on her fingers. "Any singles planed? Videos? Or a title for the album?" Dave added to his growing list of questions. "Yes and no... we want to either make 'Bubble Gum Love' or maybe a song called 'Kiss' the first single. I actually have a song written by Mary J. Blige that I want to do... that one's called, I think it's called 'If You're Okay'. Also I'm trying to do a cover of a Michael Jackson song but I won't say which one. The album has a lot to do with me... so I want to call it something like 'Just Britney' or 'Only B'." Britney chimed. "Very cool. Sounds straight to the point. Any chance to you and your famous boyfriend working together.. for say a duet?" Dave challenged her. Britney giggled into the camera. "Me and Joey? That'd be fun. I don't know if he'd have time to, but I'd like to do it. We have very different schedules now and it's hard to work together. But like I said, I want to work with 'N Sync. I got to work with Brian of Backstreet too on a song called 'Rainbows'." Britney shrugged out.

"And I'm sure they'd like to work with you again. Well I know I have to let you go... I hear the guys of 'N Sync and you have to rehearse one more time before tomorrow. So thanks for chatting with us Britney." Dave said, extending his hand. Britney grabbed it with a smile. "Thank you." she said chipperly. "And we'll see you tomorrow night." Dave added.

Britney quickly stepped away from the area and walked back to her seat. She sighed heavily. 'This is such a stress maker.' she said to herself, relaxing in her chair once more. Britney shook her head, letting her ponytail swing. Just as she got comfortable, she heard her cell phone begin to ring. 'Oh fuck.' she grumbled. Britney reached over to her backpack and pulled out her dark blue cell phone. "Yes... this is Britney." she said in a slightly annoyed tone. "Baby... I know you're probably tired just like the rest of us... but uhm, you have to get onstage before Fatima has a fit." she heard Joey's voice say with caution. Britney rolled her eyes and reclined in her seat. "Can't I get like five more minutes?" Britney sighed. "I'd give you five, but you know Fatima won't." Joey answered. Britney sat up in her chair and saw Joey staring from the stage at her. She smiled back to him. "I need a vacation after this." she added. "I'll give you a massage when we get back to the hotel Brit." Joey gave an insentive to her. Britney nodded and stood. "Promise." she requested. "I promise." Joey responded. Britney groaned and waved to Joey. "Okay, I'm coming over there." she informed him. Joey smiled and ended his phone conversation with Britney.

Another half hour went sailing by while the guys of 'N Sync stood in the diverse lobby of the Opera House. They stood by with Dave Holmes, awaiting their first interview of the day. Justin adjusted his tan hat and sunglasses, looking around for his husband. He was glad that Brian stayed behind for Justin. The remaining members of the Backstreet Boys had all returned to the hotel to get some rest after a long day of interviews and practicing. Justin wacthed as Lance fiddled with his silver ring, Chris relaxed on the floor, Joey stared at the lights of the Opera House and J.C. adjusted his clothing for the camera.

A producer handed J.C. and Joey a microphone and prepped the others for the interview. "Smile guys." the producer hissed before stepping behind camera. "Hi, Dave Holmes here once again. I've had a chance today to talk with Jay Z, Brian and Howie of the Backstreet Boys, Fatima Robinson, Jennifer Lopez, Janeane Goraflo, Matt Thompson and even Britney Spears. But my day just isn't complete until I get to talk to the guys of 'N Sync!" Dave announced, smiling at the guys. Each gave a wave to the camera, Lance mouthing the words 'Hi mom!' "Guys... it's been a busy day." Dave commented. "Yes, it has been." Joey agreed. "Very busy!" J.C. emphasised. "So busy I heard Lance missed lunch?" Dave puzzled out his question. "Yeah, poor Lance here missed lunch!" Chris said, rubbing Lance's stomach area. Lance and Justin laughed loudly. "I missed lunch trying to warm up my vocals." Lance answered for himself. "Poor guy! Now you guys have been practicing all day for your performance tomorrow night, right?" Dave questioned. "Yes, we have been." J.C. answered. "Well actually part of the time I was on the phone with my wife because little Johnny, my son, has a cold and I wanted to know if he was doing better." Chris replied sarcastically. "Uhm, okay Chris." Dave gave Chris an awkward look. Lance and J.C. snickered at Chris's joke.

"Now you guys are performing... well since everyone knows now... with Britney Spears." Dave spoke up, feeling the eyes of annoyance. "Yes, that was supposed to be a surprise!" J.C. gave Dave troubled eyes but flashed a smile. "A secret, hush hush." Chris added. "We're sorry. You know something like that just excites us over at MTV... so we couldn't hold back anymore," Dave covered for his mistake. "It's okay... we have more planned." Joey assured him. "That's true. Now what brought together this grand event? I mean the whole Britney Spears and 'N Sync performing together?" Dave questioned. Each looked at each other to see who would answer first. J.C. saw Lance's mouth beginning to form words, so he promptly borught the mic to Lance's face. "We're doing a song but it's not the usual way we do this song." Lance answered, trying to make sure he didn't reveal any other secrets. "Basically, they were like, 'We want to do a pop set... blah, blah, blah,' and we were like, 'Sure, we'll do it'" J.C. added. "But we wanted to do it a little bit different, and you'll see what happens tomorrow night." J.C. finished. Dave nodded as J.C. spoke. "There's a whole concept behind the performance, so we wanted to make sure it wasn't just, 'Hi, we're here,'" Justin explained. "It's a whole concept, so it'll be good." Justin continued. "Basically... there's surprises but we're not saying anything." Chris summarized.

"Well then I know fans and viewers alike will enjoy this performance tremendously. Is there any award you guys think you'll win or would like to win? You're up for four of them." Dave said inquisitively. "Yeah... we're up for four... we don't know if we'll win any." Joey groaned. "Yeah... at least we don't expect to win any." Justin agreed. "I mean is there one you'd like?" Dave repeated. "To be honest, I'd like all four." Chris replied, causing Justin to laugh at him. "Seriously. I want all four moonmen." Chris stated. "That would be nice... but I'd like for us to get Best Dance Video." J.C. answered. "Yes, Howie of Backstreet said the same thing but they're not up for that award." Dave agreed. "They should have been. Fatima did a good job with that video... just like she did with ours." Joey mentioned. "Yeah, what's up with that Dave?! How come BSB don't get the nomination?!" Justin said in his strong voice. "I don't know Justin... ask all the lovely folks at MTV." Dave giggled. "I think we will." Justin snickered. "Actually it'd be nice to take home Viewer's Choice. You know? So vote for us." Lance pleaded. "Not that again!" Justin complained with a smile. "Yeah, we want Viewer's Choice. Forget BSB, vote 'N Sync." Chris spout out his campaign. J.C. and Justin fell into laughter again. "Don't listen to him!" Joey teased. "Oh, what about Best Pop Video? You're up against Backstreet Boys, Britney, Ricky Martin and Madonna." Dave offered the balance in nominees. "Well we're up against MTV's favorites! Duh! How can we win?" Justin asked sarcastically. "Maybe..." Dave cooed. "We'll have to do one of those Tonya Harding things." Lance snickered. "Yeah, I'll go and get the club!" Chris cheered. Dave found himself laughing with their continued antics.

"Now let's talk about this Jive switch because it's been my topic for today. What's going on with the change?" Dave asked. "We changed labels, that's it." Joey answered. "We have switched to Jive Records when our contract with RCA sort of ended. There's some dispute about things right now that we can't speak of. That's about as much as we can say on the situation. We're happy to be with Jive... and maybe we can get a Backstreet Boys and 'N Sync super tour going next year... just maybe." Lance added onto Joey's simple explaination. "Ooh, a tour again. And a big one too." Dave cooed to the camera.

"Well tell us about the new album." Dave said, offering the floor to anyone. "It's got more songs actually written by some more of the guys in the group and produced by us as well," J.C. stated. "I think there's more heart in this album. I think we put a little more of ourselves into it. So we're excited about it." J.C. added. "Yeah, its more us. That reflects in the songs we wrote and what we picked for the album." Chris added. "And with the next single? I've heard it, it's great." Dave commented. "Oh yes, 'It's True', which is a remake is the perfect second single for us. Just because it is 'Another Step' for us music wise and what we wanted." Joey agreed. "The remix I think is even greater... I like it alot." Justin added. "Well we look forward to everything from you guys... especially tomorrow night's performance. We know it's late and you boys have to get to your hotel for some rest. So thanks for talking with us." Dave exhaled. "Thanks for talking with us." Justin replied. "Viewer's Choice!" Lance gave a final shout out. Justin laughed and pushed him lovingly. "Thanks 'N Sync." Dave said, backing away. J.C. and Joey passed off their mics to the crew and everyone gathered their things to head back to the hotel.

Just Beginning (Chapter 35) Written by JM

Justin's head was resting against a fluffy white pillow. He knew he wanted to sleep but he didn't. Instead he ran a finger over Brian's well defined cheek. Brian laid across from Justin, admiring him as Justin did. Brian's bright blue eyes reflected Justin's vibrant glow. They didn't say anything for the past hour, just admired each other, exchanging small kisses here and there. "Are you tired sweetie?" Brian questioned. Justin nodded. "Do you want me to go so you can rest?" Brian asked. "No." Justin answered softly. Brian smiled and wrapped his legs with Justin's.

Justin nibbled his lower lip and scooted closer to Brian. They were in a relaxed state with no one to bother them. Brian licked his lips slowly and pressed a finger on Justin's shirt. "You weren't thinking about..." Brian stopped Justin by giving him a small kiss on the lips. "No." he replied as he backed away. "I just wanted to see you comfortable. I was thinking about us fucking or anything..." Brian added softly and kindly. "Oh, okay." Justin whispered. He kissed Brian back and then slipped away. "I love you baby boy." Justin added. Brian giggled and carried his smile as he snuggled to the bed.

"Hey! I won fair and square!" a voice barked from the next room. "NO! You cheated!" another voice argued. Brian grumbled and saw that Justin was too annoyed. "Why can't A.J. and Nick act like adults? Damn." Brian complained. He lifted his fist and began to bang on the wall near the bed. "Shut up! People are resting you know!" Brian yelled while banging. Justin nuzzled his upper body to Brian's to calm him. Brian noticed Justin's gesture and placed his hand down. He brought the hand to Justin's back and hugged him. He kissed the top of Justin's head with happiness.

"Have Nick and J.C. talked at all?" Brian asked lowly. "No... Josh is taking some time to think things over while Nick hasn't attempted to say anything." Justin answered. Brian nodded. "Well let's not talk about them." Brian suggested, rubbing Justin's back. "Let's talk about you and Nick then." Justin stated. "Let's not. Me and Nick are pretty much cool now." Brian assured Justin. Justin nodded, kissing Brian's neck. "It's no big deal baby." Justin responded. Brian smiled, still rubbing Justin's back.

"Let's dance." brian suddenly said. "Huh?" Justin asked, looking up at Brian. "Let's dance cutie." Brian repeated, releasing Justin from their hug. Justin was still confused. Brian rolled out of the bed and stood awaiting Justin. Justin propped himself up on his elbows and looked at Brian oddly. "Come on." Brian outstretched his arms to Justin. Justin wrinkled his brow before standing.

Justin shimmed over to Brian and let Brian pull him into a hug. Brian began the slow rocking, hugging tightly to Justin. Justin shrugged and wrapped his arms around Brian's back. Brian's hands slipped to Justin's waist to hold him. He began to hum into Justin's ear, stimulating their slow movements. "What are you humming Brian?" Justin questioned, nuzzling to Brian's head. "Something." Brian replied softly. He kissed Justin's neck and continued to hum.

Rock a bye baby

This is your lulabaye

Your daddy loves you sweetie

Please don't cry

When you wake again

I promise I'll be there

Because I love you

Angel, daddy cares

Justin listened with sharp ears. "Did you just make that up?" Justin asked. "Yes..." Brian whispered into Justin's ear. He continued to hum his melody, looking for the right lyrics.

So close your sweet eyes

I'll hold your hand

I'll sing your lulabye

I'll put you to bed

Because your daddy loves you

You're his Angel, baby boy

And everything about you

I do love...

Because your daddy loves you

And so does your dad

Angel, we love you

We'll be right there...

Justin felt like he was dancing on the clouds while dancing with Brian. Something about the song he sang for their 'son' and the way he kept holding him gently brought him to new heights. "And I love you Justin..." Brian cooed softly. Justin closed his eyes and continued to dance. He felt Brian's soft lips kiss his forehead and continue to dance. "You'll be the best father." Justin whispered. Brian hugged Justin tighter. "Thanks for saying that." he replied. Justin gave Brian's neck a quick kiss before dancing even slower.

"It's time for bed, right?" Brian questioned. Justin gave a small nod and lifted his head. "I want you to stay but they are going to get us early so we can get our clothes fitted and fixed for the show." Justin stated. "I know... Chris told me." Brian responded, placing a finger over Justin's young lips. Justin frowned slightly.

Brian ended their hug and their dancing. He grabbed Justin's soft hand and walked him over to the bed. Justin stood by the edge of the bed and looked at Brian. Brian smiled and laid Justin down on the bed. He let Justin lay his head on the fluffy pillow and interlocked his fingers with Justin's. "You're so cute." Brian commented, rubbing Justin's nose lightly. "Aaawww, thanks." Justin giggled quietly. "What if we named the baby Angel Sebastian Littrell?" Brian suggested. Justin thought over the name. "That'd be cute." Justin nodded. Brian shrugged. "We have time..." Brian whispered, kissing Justin's nose. "Close your eyes." Brian whispered. Justin did as requested and shit his eyes. Brian leaned down and pressed his lips to Justin's for a short and not lingering kiss. "I love you Justin..." he whispered, pulling away. "I love you too Snowflake." Justin replied.

Brian stood from the bed and walked towards the door. "Goodnight." he whispered. Justin kept his eyes closed and got comfortable upon the bed. "Goodnight." he whispered. Brian flicked off the light and took a final look at his husband laying on the single bed. The angelic yet small smile on Justin's face caused a smile to curl over Brian's lips. 'It's only for these days... soon we'll be in the same bed again.' Brian assured himself. He walked out of the room and shut the door tightly.

"Welcome everybody to a slightly rainy edition of the 1999 MTV Video Music Awards Opening Act, here at the glorious Metropolitan Opera House in New York City. I'm Kurt Loder and this here is Serena Altschul. You just watched a great performance from Smash Mouth, one of our opening acts for tonight's show. Later on you'll be seeing a live performance from Blink 182 as well as an exclusive interview with Nine Inch Nails frontman Trent Rezonor..." Kurt announced through his mic. "Yes and also we'll be taking you on an exclusive shopping spree with Teen Queen Britney Spears as well as greeting and interviewing tonight's guests as they arrive here at the Metropolitan Opera House in New York City." Serena added. "We'll be working with our correspondants Ananda Lewis, Carson Daly, Dave Holmes, Chris Connely and John Norris." Kurt stated. "And all of the stars arriving here tonight..." Serena added with a smile. "Well I'm looking forward to it despite the drizzle we're experiencing." Kurt turned to face Serena. "Yeah, me too." Serena nodded. "Well let's head to one of our correspondants..." Kurt suggested, ending their segment.

One of many black limo's pulled into the area set for the celebrities to stop at. "This sucks!" Chris became grouchy as he looked outside. "Huh? We're at the MTV Awards. What sucks about it? Do you not hear the fans?" Lance questioned with puzzlement. "No not that... it's raining you goof." Chris replied, taking his eyes from the rain outside. "Yeah, that is a bummer." Joey agreed, relaxing in his seat. "It'll stop." Mandy assured Chrs. Chris sighed and patted her knee. "People will think things..." J.C. hummed. "You're dating Nick..." Chris hummed back. "You two are idiots." Joey giggled. "Guys... we are here. Now remember keep smiles on your face and don't answer any questions you are uncomfortable with or any questions pertaining to your personal lives." Abby, 'N Sync's P.R. while in New York informed them. "Oh yeah, that won't be too hard." Justin grumbled. "I'll keep the questions directed to anything that has to do with you and Brian to a minimum if not none Justin." Abby assured Justin. Justin nodded, still feeling unsure towards the situtation with the press.

Soon the door to 'N Sync's limo were popped open. Lonnie, the security guard, was the first to step out. He saw the advancing press and made sure they stayed back in their designated area. "Remember... we HAVE to talk to the MTV people since this is their event." Abby reminded the guys before she stepped out. "That's an easy one." Chris smiled, following her out of the limo. He reached back into the limo, giving Mandy his hand. "Well he is so nice." Mandy chimed to the others, stepping out of the limo with the help of Chris. "Oh yes, he's just the best." Lance teased, following her out. J.C. sighed and took Lance's lead. "Well are we going or hoping our loved ones will rescue us?" Joey asked Justin. Justin shrugged, still not wanting to exit. "I think you had better get your asses out here." Lance snapped at them from the outside. "And that's our answer." Joey laughed. Justin nodded and followed Joey out of the limo.

They were bombarded by flashes of lights and screaming fans. "Oh yes, the joys of being in 'N Sync." Joey laughed, placing an arm on Justin for a quick pose. "Maybe they'll throw their bra and panties this time." Justin sarcastically agreed. "Juicy!" Joey teased. He waved to the onslaught of fans from across the way. They stood under a large umbrella, avoiding the sprinkling rain. "Come on guys, the press and MTV awaits..." Abby stated, trying to coax them to walk towards the many interview booths.

A blonde with slight curls in her hair stood on a level of the Metropolitan Opera House lobby. She awaited the cameras to be set up and the spotlight to click on. Her hair was bleached platinum blonde and her outfit was worn in a distasteful manner. She sported a leopard print outfit with a noticeable pink bra and other mageneta garments. Her make-up was well overdone and her attitude was felt by many that had been near her earlier. "We're almost ready Miss Aguilera." one of the producer's informed her. "Okay..." she sighed. She was not content with the time it was taking for her to do a simple interview for the show.

"Well thank you Kurt and Serena. It is true... tonight is a night of many stars and one of those stars happens to be this young lady right here, who just happens to have the number one album in America. I'm not talking about Britney Spears or Mariah Carey, but none other than the 'Genie' herself, Miss Christina Aguilera." Chris Connely made the introduction for the interview. Chritina curled her lip slightly in disgust with the names mentioned beforehand before smiling for the camera. "Hello everyone." she chimed when the lights flashed upon her. "Hello Christina... now are you looking for to tonight's show despite our bad weather here?" Chris questioned, stetching his mic to her. "Oh yes. Of course because it's MTV. I'm actually really excited but a little bit nervous too." Christina replied. "And you're looking forward to presenting?" Chris asked. "Actually that's what I'm nervous about. This is my first MTV Awards... so you know I'm nervous that I'll mess up or something." Christina answered perkily. "Ah, a virgin to MTV Awards. Well what award are you presenting?" Chris pondered. Christina tiffed at his last comment. "I'm presenting for Best Rock Video... with Tommy Lee." she responded with a slippery smile. "Oh, any guesses as to who will win?" Chris questioned. "Actually, no. I'm not sure." she sneered. "But you've got your Kid Rock, your Korn, your Limp Bizkit..." Chris began to list off people. "I just hope the best man wins. That's all." Christina interrupted him.

"Okay. Is there anyone you're looking forward to seeing tonight?" Chris asked. "Uh yeah..." Christina winked, running her finger through one of her semi-curls. "I actually want to see Eminem." she replied in a seductive tone. "Eminem? Really?!" Chris acted surprise. "Yeah... he's cute. I think he'll do a great job... he's really cute." Christina answered, still intrigued by the idea. "Well Eminem does do a good job. I'm sure somehow you'll meet him here tonight." Chris turned to the camera. "I hope so." Christina smiled. "Well that's it for me and Christina, back to you Kurt." Chris announced. The camera clicked off and Christina made nice with Chris one last time before walking away. 'And there's one more person I have to see tonight...' Christina smiled to herself. She made her way down the grand steps thinking of one name, 'Justin'.

"Well thanks Chris. I'm outside here, in this rainy weather with non other than the guys of 'N Sync. Hello guys, how are you?" Kurt questioned, trying to steady his umbrella. "Fine." was the unison response. "Now you guys are performing with Britney Spears tonight, right?" Kurt asked to start their small interview. "Yeah... it was supposed to be a SURPRISE but you know." J.C. replied, still brooding over the incident from the previous day. "We're performing with Britney and some surprises here and there." Lance added. "Are you looking forward to winning anything tonight?" Kurt wondered. "We'd like to win Viewer's Choice." Lance smiled, holding up his crossed fingrs. Justin nudged him with a smile. "Maybe Group Video or Best Pop Video I guess. We really don't expect to win any others." Chris said. "Those would be nice to take home. Now what about for performances? Is there anyone special?" Kurt looked around for an answer. "Lauryn Hill." both Joey and Chris were the first to reply. "Yeah, Lauryn Hill." J.C. agreed, noticing Justin missed the question. "Sounds great. Are you looking forward to seeing the Backstreet Boys perform?" Kurt tried to throw in his reporter knowledge to build tension. "Yes... they will probably put on a good performance." Chris answered. "I think they'll do a great show. We have no problem watching them or anything." Justin tried to shut out the thoughts Kurt was trying to build. "They're out label mates, of course we're going to support them." Lance added. "Did you guys bring dates or someone special? Justin? Joey? Since we do know you both have confessed to having a certain someone in your life." Kurt pondered another intriguing question. "I brought a date." Chris spoke up. "I've got friends here with me," Lance agreed, trying to bring the attention away from Justin and Joey. "I brought my brother, does that count?" Joey laughed. "Nah... I'm going solo just for tonight." Justin decided to answer. "Just for tonight?" Kurt wondered. "Yeah... just for tonight." Justin nodded.

"Okay good. Well I know you guys want to get inside now and out of this awful rain, so I'll let you go." Kurt said, ending their interview on camera. "It's not that bad." Lance commented, passing his microphone to a staff member. "Well we need you guys to get in and probably get seated." Kurt explained, preparing to move in for his next interview. Chris chrugged and looked down from where they stood. He waved to the incoming guests, spotting the girls of 702. "There she is!" Chris excitedly whispered to Joey. Joey laughed as he saw Meelah, Misha and Irish. "What are you going to do? Run down there and get her?" Joey asked with a snicker. Chris thought out the idea. Joey elbowed him when he noticed Meelah waving up to them. Chris looked down and quickly waved back. Joey stood with a smile on his face while he watched others arrive.

"Well this is Chris Connely once again in the Metropolitan Opera House and I'm standing here with two of rap's 'MAFIA' members. I'm here with Lil' Cease and Lil' Kim..." Chris said, pointing out the two guests standing by. Lil' Cease leaned against the railing of the Opera House, sporting a navy blue denim outfit and a white T-Shirt with a Yankees hat on while Lil' Kim came in a more dramatic appeal. She wore a peackock blue wig that slipped past her shoulders. Her outfit was a body fitting outfit with belly bottom pantlegs. The outfit was dazzled with sequenced seashells as the design while the sash of the outfit only covered half of her upper body. Her left half was exposed, covering her left breast with a stick-on applique, formed in the shape of a seashell. On the left arm, which was also exposed, were the same stick-on appliques. Lil' Kim knew she was turning heads all over the lobby but she didn't care, she was at the Awards to have fun and to show she could be as sexy as she wanted.

"Now if anyone is looking for a guy that didn't dress up for tonight's show because Lil' Cease is the main suspect." Chris joked with Lil' Cease, causing Lil' Cease to smile. "I just came as I was." Lil' Cease replied. "But on the other hand, if they are looking for the exotic Queen of the night, they can surely turn to you can't they Kim?" Chris giggled. Kim laughed along with him, letting her glossy lips smile. "Well I just figured it's the MTV Awards, it's the last one of the millennium and since I like to be unique, I figured why not? You know? We're here to get good publicity and this is what we want... good publicity. My stylist worked with me for this outfit." Kim answered, still laughing. "So you had this made?" Chris questioned. "Yeah... she made it for me." Kim answered. "Now you're doing something special tonight that I won't ruin or tell or anything. Are you excited about it?" Chris asked. "Oh yes! I'm going to have so much fun. I'm really excited about it... but it's a secret. I can't tell... well they said I can't tell because it's going to be BIG like that." Kim emphasised. "And with you Kim, I'm sure it will be. Is there anyone you guys want to see tonight?" Chris held out his mic with his question. "I'm looking forward to seeing all the performers, all the nominess and all of the winners. I'm here for it all... I want to just live it up." Kim answered with excitement. "And you Cease?" Chris wondered. "I... I wanna see Jay Z. I'm here to see Kim do her thing... and then I wanna see Jay Z too." Lil' Cease replied. "Aaawww, thank you pookie." Kim chimed, giving him a small hug. "Well I'm sure you two will have fun. I wish you both the best of luck... back to you Serena." Chris ended their interview with a smile.

The rain had stopped and everything seemed to be moving a bit smoother. Nick sighed as he looked at the press before him. "Who are you guys dating? Who are your dates tonight?" one reporter spoke up. "Are you going to leave Jive because of 'N Sync now?" another questioned. "What is your next single?" another pondered. "Can we expect you guys at the Grammy's?" a fourth spoke up. "What about Justin Timberlake? Is Nick Carter really leaving to do his own album?" the fifth shouted out. Nick became aggaravted with the questions he and his friends received from the press. "I guess we should each answer one eh?" Kevin suggested to the guys. Brian gave him an intense stare. He knew he would be the one who would have to answer about he and Justin. It was something he more feared for Justin's sake.

"We're not informing anyone of who are significant others are at this time or any time. That is our private life and we prefer keep it that way. However some of us do have dates for tonight's show." Kevin answered the first question. "We are not planning on leaving Jive Records... and surely not because 'N Sync is there now. There is no justified reason to leave." A.J. took the second question. "Our next single is 'Don't Wanna Lose You Now'." Howie took the third. "We may or may not be at the Grammy's. It depends on how our schedule is going." Nick answered the fourth. "What about Justin? Does he have something to do with the Backstreet Boys? He's a friend of ours. Nick is not leaving the group for a solo album. We'd all like to do something solo at one time or another, but not now and we're not breaking up." Brian let out the answer for the fifth question. "That's all the guys have time for now. Sorry." Denise McLean spoke up, seeing that the guys needed to get away from the press.

"Is Nick dating a girl named Mandy? What about Brian and Justin's supposed affair? Is Brian dating Leigh Ann? What about the girl with A.J.?" more questions shot off as the guys moved away from the area. "Those bastards." A.J. hissed. "Watch it little boy, you are around your mother." Denise warned him as they walked. "I'm sorry mom but they have no right to know about our personal lives." A.J. grumbled. "They were getting a bit too touchy." Kevin agreed. "Just a 'bit'?" Howie added with sarcasm. "It doesn't matter... they didn't get anything out of us." Nick piped up, trying to distract Brian's mind from what had happened. Brian shook his head with more disbelief.

"This is Chris Connelly down on the red carpet, with Matt Thompson. Matt, how are you doing?" Chris turned to his left to look at Matt. "I'm doing great." Matt replied with a smile as Chris shoved the mic in his face. "Are you excited about presenting with Alanis and Mark McGrath tonight?" Chris asked. "Oh yeah. I've managed not to pee on myself yet." Matt laughed into the mic. "Who are you hoping will win some awards tonight?" Chris asked quickly. "Well, I'm pulling for Backstreet Boys, 'N Sync, TLC, and ofcourse Madonna." Matt listed his hopefuls. "Definitely want to see Madonna get up there." Chris replied. "Yeah, it's just not an award show unless Madonna wins something." Matt replied with a laugh. "Who all are you looking forward to performing?" Chris queried. "Well, Backstreet Boys first of all because they always put on a great show, with all the dancing and whatnot. Also, I'm dying to see TLC, especially Lisa Lopez perform. I'm wondering though, why Alanis was not asked to perform?" Matt turned to the camera with a questioning look. Chris laughed at Matt's question. "Why are you excited to see Lisa Lopez?" he changed the subject Matt tried to dwell on. "That woman rocks my world. Her rap styles are the best, and she always ups TLC's perform a couple notches. She's always the show stealer." Matt explained with a smile. "Little infatuation, I see?" Chris giggled. "Oh yeah, you know it," Matt turned to the camera, "Call me Lisa, we'll get together." Chris laughed loudly as Matt spoke into the mic and looked at the camera. "Any plans for after the awards?" Chris asked. "I'm going to head out to the MTV after show party and just meet some new people." Matt replied, looking back at Chris. "I bet it's not often you get to socialize with the music scene?" Chris shot out. "Right, I'm sort of out of my element, which makes it all the more exciting." Matt replied with an evil grin. "Well, thank you for talking with me, Matt." Chris reached out to shake Matt's hand. "Hey, it's not like anyone else was begging to talk to me." Matt laughed as he shook Chris' hand.

Matt peered across the red carpet to see the Backstreet Boys moving to the stand MTV had set up. He spotted Brian and a smooth smiled curled on his lips. He watched as the Backstreet Boys' entourage stood at the bottom of the stand. Matt shuffled through the group and saw no sign of Justin. 'Now that's funny... I could have swore Brian said he was married. Where's the 'Curly' guy he's supposed to be married to?' Matt pondered. Matt shrugged and continued his walk towards the man building. He returned his thoughts to Alanis and ignored the thought of Brian Littrell.

Each Backstreet Boy took a seat on the stand with Serena. A.J., Howie and Nick took the front while Brian and Kevin stood in the back. A.J. wore a comfortable cut off shirt, light gray with crocodile skin pants. His hair was black except for the ends which were deeply blonde. Howie wore a beaded sweater that shimmered in the spotlights. His hair was neatly parted into zig zag corn rows and he wore tight, black leather pants. Kevin sported a shirt similiar to Howie's, except his was cut off. Nick sported a heavy brown, suede jacket and a light tan sweater underneath. His pants were baggy while his hair was ragged, giving him a more grunge look. Brian wore a tan, leather coat with a brown shirt underneath. His pants were also tan, matching his full outfit with a lighter shade. His hair was a honey blonde that he began to love thanks to his husband.

Serena prepared herself one last time before getting cued to start the segment. "Hello, I'm Serena Altchul and I'm sitting here with one of tongiht's many performers and nominees, the Backstreet Boys. How are you fellas tonight?" Serena asked, taking her attention from the camera to the Backstreet Boys. "We're doing good." Howie replied. "Yeah, we're excited." A.J. nodded. "We're happy the rain stopped." Kevin said from behind. "Yeah, that's a good thing." Nick agreed. "What did it feel like to rehearse inside of the Opera House?" Serena shot out her first question. "It was really cool." Howie replied, looking around for approval. "Great acoustics and all. That whole opera feel." A.J. agreed. "It's huge though." Nick added. "Yes, it is. Is that not one of the most beautiful places... inside of there?" Serena commented and questioned at once. "It's very beautiful. We're happy to be performing here." Kevin answered. Serena nodded with a smile. "You're up for four nomiations this year, three of which are against the guys of 'N Sync. Is there any competition?" Serena asked. Nick quickly rolled his eyes and stretched the mic up to Kevin. Brian gave him an odd look and awaited a microphone to come his way. "No... it's not about competition. It's flattering, but no." Brian answered. "We don't consider it competition." Kevin answered in his heavy voice. "Yeah... may the best man win is what we think." A.J. added. "So nothing like if you lose, it's blame 'N Sync?" Serena looked for a further explaination. "We're not that petty." Nick quickly answered snobbishly. Serena backed away from the subject just as swiftly.

"I hear you're rehearsing also to be heading out on tour soon. What's that like?" Serena asked to lighten the mood. "We haven't started rehearsals just yet as we're still working out the venue's and stuff but it'll be about a two month tour where we hit about maybe twenty to twenty-five different venues." Howie stated. "So it'll be rather big. Bigger than Europe." Nick spoke up. "We have to work out off time and recording time and all of that. Brian's about to shoot a video and he needs time for that. We're shooting a new video before going on tour... so it's hectic right now but we'll be releasing tour dates and all of that by the end of next week." Kevin added. "So you're just tying up loose ends." Serena commented. She got several nods. "Now you took one award home last year. If you take home one this year, are you going to put it next to the other?" Serena gave a simple question. "Yeah, of course. I mean it depends on whic of us takes it home." Kevin nodded. "We'll probably put it at our offices in L.A." Brian mentioned briefly.

"Okay, I know you guys want to get inside because it's getting late and almost time for the show. Did you come with dates?" Serena asked, giving slight blushes from several of them. "Come on... I won't be jealous." Serena tried to coax them with a giggle. They laughed along with her. Kevin knew he'd have to take control over the mic. "Well... some of us brought dates... yeah, you know. Someone to share the fun with." Kevin slyly answered, causing Nick to laugh. "Some of us couldn't bring our dates." A.J. commented. "Well are you guys bringing your dates to the after parties?" Serena asked with a grin. "Uhm, I'm not sure if we're even going to party tonight?" Kevin gave a questionable look to his comrades. "No, HE'S not going to party tonight." Nick laughed. "Some of us are." Brian nodded. "Okay, well thanks for talking with us guys and good luck with tonight's show." Serena gave her final comment, signing off. They all waved to her and made their exit.

"Well that was cute." Danay commented as Howie and the others came down. "Cute? I thought we did good." Howie laughed. Danay shrugged, sporting her pink cowboy hat and matching outfit. "I liked it." Nikki smiled at Kevin, wearing a nice, slik blue dress. "Thank you Peach." Kevin chimed, grabbing her hand. "It was better than that other press onslaught we had to deal with." Brian agreed, standing nearby. "True, very true." Nick nodded. "Can we get inside?" A.J. requested, missing Amanda by the minutes. "Well okay." Nick chrugged, forcing the others to walk the rest of the ways towards the Opera House.

The lobby of the Opera House was crowded with celebrities and fans who had tickets for the show. Many greeted each other while others signed autographs. Justin stood in a corner watching the action. He watched while Lil' Kim, A.J. and Mary J. Blige conversed. He looked on while J.C. made silly faces with Joey. He caught Kevin and Nikki becoming casual with the girls of TLC. He saw Chris casually playing around with Busta Rhymes and Rah Digga of the Flipmode Squad. He made eye contact with Lance while he chatted with the guys of the Offspring. He was happy his friends could mingle so easily.

Justin stood next to Brian, trying not to be seen wtih him by any press. He held pinkies with Brian as others avoided them easily. "This is nice." Brian giggled, gripping Justin's pinky tighter. "Well since we're not sitting together at the show, it's nice to be with you for a little bit today." Justin whispered. Brian nodded, waving to Don Philip as he passed. "Don't cheer me me too loud when we perform." Brian teased Justin. "I won't baby." Justin giggled. Brian inched nearer to him, just to feel his warmth. "We had better hurry this up. Abby will probably come over here and break us up." Justin sighed. Brian nodded, still holding Justin's pinky. "Are you coming to our after party?" Justin asked, looking around for familiar faces. "It might be just me... but yes." Brian answered softly. Justin acknowledged Janet Jackson when she walked by and then Jordan Knight as he tried to catch up to Janet. "I love you Brian." Justin whispered, knowing he had to end their moment. "I love you too." Brian whispered back. They hesitantly released pinkies and moved their seperate ways.

Brian walked into the main area with A.J., Kevin, Danay, Nikki, Howie and Nick. He saw the area reserved for their seats and saw a blonde sitting in one of the seats. He noticed the girl and his brow wrinkled. A.J. caught a glimpse of what Brian was staring at and sighed. "What are you doing Leigh Ann?" A.J. asked bitterly, walking by her to his seat. "Sitting in my seat." Leigh Ann answered with little attitude. "Aren't you supposed to be at the end of the row?" Nick questioned with wonder. Leigh Ann shook her head and crossed her legs. "I have been appointed Brian's date somehow." Leigh Ann answered, looking up to Brian with innocent eyes. "No, uh uh, no way." Brian shook his head with anger. Kevin placed a hand on Brian's shoulder with concern. "Brian... just do it." Kevin whispered a request. "Just let the heffer sit there." Danay grumbled, taking a seat with Howie. "But..." Kevin shook Brian to stop him. "She's not your date. You know very well that your husband is four rows behind us. You have nothing to worry about. Just let her sit there and she can 'pretend' to be your date if that's what management or whoever wants. Then we'll confront them about it tomorrow. But for now, save everyone in this row the embarassment and sit down next to Leigh Ann." Kevin requested with his plead. Brian kept a wrinkled brow while staring at Leigh Ann. "I'm married... I don't want anything to do with you." Brian warned her, taking his seat. Kevin sighed with relief and walked to his seat.

"Listen Brian... do you think I want to be here? It's part of my contract to keep my ass from getting in trouble. I'm here to have a good time, not argue with you or your husband. So please can me and you not fight tonight... so we can both have a good time." Leigh Ann explained. She relaxed in her seat next to Brian. Brian shook his head. "Don't try anything." Brian whispered. "I was about to tell you the same thing." she laughed. Brian smiled smally and looked out towards the stage.

"Who is going to tell Justin?" Brian whispered to Danay and Howie. "I think he'll figure it out sooner or later." Howie answered with sarcasm. "I'll go tell him." Danay covered for Howie. She quickly slapped Howie's arm and stood. Brian nodded and watched her walk off towards the row 'N Sync sat in. Brian was nervous sitting next to Leigh Ann. She seemed content with her seat while Brian felt a bit edgy sitting with her. Somehow he knew this would be best to help prevent anyone from digging into Brian and Justin's personal lives.