********** hellooooo!!! I hope you guys are doing just fine...well here's the nect chapter in Jack's life. You all know that he broke up with Brian, so we'll have to see how he has been doing since that day... **********
The first three weeks after Brian walked out of my house and out of my life were the hardest ones for me.
My brothers tried as hard as they could to cheer me up, they would invite me to parties, take me to the movies, etc. but I just did not want to do anything. I'd just spend my time in my room. I did not want to see anybody or go out at all. At night, I could not sleep. I would stay all night long sitting by the window looking at the sky.
The only thing that was on my mind was Brian. I didn't know why, since I was the one who finished our relationship, but I only thought of him and wondered where he could be and with whom...
Daniel knew what was going on in my life and had been very helpful. He did all that was needed at the office for me. I didn't feel like working and I didn't feel like doing anything.
I was disoriented and I wanted to figure out what was wrong with me and what was missing in my life, or why I was so depressed. Brian had been one of the most important people in my life. We were together for about 7 or 8 months and I got to know him a lot. I guess he was the man I had loved the most, but he was also the man who had hurt me the most.
One night I was looking at the stars and I got to thinking about fate...that crazy concept that we are not very familiar with...would it be true that there is only one right person for each one of us? If this was it, could we miss our fate at some point during our life? I thought that maybe I had, but I wasn't sure...
More or less after three months my life went back to normal. It all happened because Johnny phoned me to see how things were going. He told me that he felt sorry for what had happened to me and Brian, but he could not wait any longer. He explained that the executives wanted to have new designs and that if I was not able to continue with my job then he would have to find a new designer.
That's when I realized that I could not continue that way. I had worked hard all my life to get to where I was. I knew I could not let it slip off my hands. I was not going to let my break up with Brian get in the way. I would try to put that aside so that I could continue with my work, and only a couple of weeks later I was working again...
I had officially quit my job as the designer of the BSB. It was a hard choice to make but I knew that it was for the best. The guys were a bit sad that I was not going to be working for them anymore, but they understood why I was doing it. I reassured them that if they ever needed me, they should not hesitate to contact me at all. We also agreed that if they needed my help with some outfits, I would be delighted to make them for them...
On the other hand, I was still working for N*sync and now I was the designer of their clothing line. It was actually a time consuming job and I hardly had any time to do anything else. Since Daniel had been in charge while I was in absent, he knew more than me about certain things. But I gradually picked up my pace.
The first day I went to work, Paul drove me there, since I was a bit afraid to use the car again, due to the accident that I had had. So he drove me to work and he picked me up afterwards. And he did this several days, until I decided to drive again, since I knew I could not depend on my brother forever...
I had not seen my new office until that day. I was completely dumfounded when I saw it. It was practically huge. The building itself was great outside, but inside it was much more luxurious.
Let me describe the office roughly. As soon as you stepped out of the elevator, you'd see the front desk where Sophie, the secretary, would be. Sophie was around 30 and she was quite beautiful. She was married and had two children. I knew them very well because I had let Sophie take them to the office a few times when she could not find a baby sitter. I didn't mind at all since I loved children. Daniel was not very happy with it, but since I was the boss, I was the one who made the decisions. I'd let her children play in my office or surf through the net if they felt like it.
Anyway, I was telling you about my office. So there was Sophie at the entrance and then there was a small waiting lounge right next to her. Then, there was an aisle which led to all of the offices. The first one was Daniel's. It was bigger than his last one, but it was not massive. It was a normal size. Then in front of his office was Laura's office. Laura was a girl that Daniel had hired and was part of my new working team. She was quite friendly but I could see that there was something going on between her and Joseph. Joseph was another new member of my work team. He was a bit older than the rest of us. He was around 50, but he was still in good shape.
Well, further down the aisle you'd find my office and in front of mine Joseph's office. My office was huge. It had its own little lounge and the biggest desk I had ever seen. The coolest thing about my office was that it had a big fish tank embedded on to the wall. It was absolutely amazing and it had great fish in it. I had never had fish before, therefore I didn't know what kind of fish they were, but they looked cool. I was determined to learn more about fish...
On the other side of the office there was a huge window with a great view to the city. I just loved my office. Daniel had used it while I was away, but when I came back he moved to his office. I had felt that Daniel was a bit different. I wasn't sure why, but he was always angry and had very negative feelings towards the job itself. I knew I had to talk to him to see what was going on...
I trialed off again, I was describing the office...well Joseph's office was as big as Daniel's and had nothing special in it. At the end of the aisle there were three rooms. One was where we kept all the designs and prototypes. Another one was and empty office. And the last one was the conference room. Here was where all the big decisions took place. It was a big and cozy room. The desk sat around 12 people even though only 4 of us worked there...
Well, the first couple of days were a bit hard for me since I had little idea about the movement and what was needed there. Thankfully, Daniel explained what I needed to know about the business and I quickly took over. Laura was very efficient and always very kind, I liked her a lot.
Apart from work things, nothing special happened to me. John was still with his girlfriend and their love grew stronger very day. Paul was dating a girl named Sara. She was a bit younger than him, but they looked good together. Paul was taking things slowly to see where his relationship was going.
I, on the other hand, had nobody in my life. Since I had broken off with Brian, I had not gone out with another guy. I hardly did anything apart from work. I'd go to work in the morning and then I would go straight home. I didn't feel like doing anything else. I went through a period of depression, but I made it out fairly quickly. I tried to get over Brian, but it was so hard, everything reminded me of him...
So here I am, after three difficult and painful months, sitting on my desk looking out the window. The sky was clear and the sun was shinning.
"Jack?"
"Huh?"
"Did you hear me?" Sophie said looking at me
"Yeah, I heard you, but...could you repeat it so that I'm sure I heard you right?"
"Day dreaming again? Listen you've got an appointment with the executives at 6:00, then you've got your brother's party at 8, got it?" Sophie asked smiling
"Perfect, got that" I replied looking at my watch. I noticed that it was already 5:30. I decided to leave for my appointment, so I grabbed my coat and headed for the door.
"Keep your cell on!" Sophie said loudly before I walked out of the office
"I will"
I walked to the elevator. As I walked passed Laura's office, I noticed that she was having an intimate moment with Stephen. They were kissing deeply and he had his hands on her ass. I didn't care what they did, as long as it didn't keep them away from their work.
"Laura" I said and then they broke their kiss "I need those papers that I asked you tonight at the latest"
"Yes Jack" she replied as she went back to her work "they will be on your desk"
"And Stephen?" I looked at him "I need the check the designs tomorrow morning"
"Sure, no problem" he replied.
I just continued my way to the elevator. The doors opened almost right away and I stepped inside. There was a huge man already inside the elevator. I tried not to stare at the guy but it was difficult. He was really tall and he was like a brick wall, really muscled. He was actually intimidating. We stayed silent all the way down and they I just headed for my car.
I had changed my car, since I had the accident in my VW Beetle. I bought a new one, this one was so cool and I loved it. It was a red Viper. It was the best car I had ever had. It was very fast, but I still did not venture to drive that fast. I drove at normal speed...
Anyway, I drove out of the car park and headed for my appointment. After a few minutes I arrived at the Jive Records building. I parked my car right in front of it and then I stepped out. I looked at the building before I went inside. It was the first time I had gone there since I had stopped working for the BSB.
I had seen the guys a couple of times but not as often as I used to. I had not seen Brian or heard from him since the day he walked out of my house.
I walked into the building and then I headed for the elevators. Right then, I noticed that Nick was waiting for the elevator.
"Hi Nick" I said and he turned around.
"Hey man, what's up?" he replied happily
"Not much really, I've got a meeting with some executives"
"Wow, that's' great" he replied
"So what have you been up to?" I asked him
"Well, right now, we're promoting the album"
"That's good" I replied and then we both went into the elevator.
On our way up, we chatted for a while. Nick explained that the guys and him had been working hard and had been doing a lot of promotion for their greatest hits album. I was pleased to see that they were doing fine. Nick also told me that they were going to take a break from their work. After they finished their promotion, each one of them would do something different. I was a bit sad to hear this and I asked him if they were breaking up. Nick said that they were not breaking up as such, but they would not be doing any new albums for a while...
I asked him how the guys were doing and he said everything was great. I did not ask him about Brian and neither did he mention him.
When we reached his floor, he stepped out of the elevator.
"Let's go out sometime"
"I would love that" I told him "call me anytime you can"
"Ok, nice seeing you again" he said and then the doors closed before I could say something else.
The elevator went up and then I stepped out of it when I reached my floor. I walked to the conference room and all the executives were already there. It was a brief meeting. They only wanted to know how things were going with the designs. I told them that the designs for the new season were coming along just fine.
One of them explained that the clothes were selling quickly. I was pleased to hear this, since I realized that people liked my designs. A smile came across my face.
The rest of the meeting went pretty fast. I was glad that I was able to carry on with my work and that they liked it too. Before they left, I told them that I had a new idea. I was planning on extending the range of clothing that we made. I was planning on doing more than just pants, shirts, and things like that; maybe we could try suits, ties, coats, etc. The men were silent for a second or two, but then they said it was actually a good idea. They told me to make a presentation for them the following week to see what I had in mind.
When the meeting was over, I went back to my car and drove off. I thought that maybe I would encounter Nick again, but I didn't. I was driving when I felt like I was going to throw up. I quickly stopped the car and then I threw up in a dumpster.
I had no idea why I had thrown up, but I didn't feel very well. I decided to go for a small walk in the park, so that I might feel better. There were many people there; there were children running around and everything. I sat down by one of the trees facing the playground. I watched the children play.
I lay down and looked at the sky. The sky was clear and it was a beautiful evening.
Suddenly an enormous dog came over and started drooling all over me. Freaked out, I quickly got up and tried to push the dog away, the dog kept sniffing me and he started to pull on my leg. A guy came over quickly and grabbed the dog by his collar and pulled it away from me.
"Are you ok?" he asked preoccupied
"I think I will be" I said as I looked at my clothes. I had dog saliva all over my coat and pants. I tried to wipe it away but it was so sticky...it was gross.
"Oh look at your suit" the guy said as he took out of his pocket a small handkerchief "let me clean it"
He then began wiping my coat, but he let go of the dog, so the dog quickly started pulling on my leg again.
"I think I'll do it myself" I said as he grabbed the dog again.
"Ok man" he replied and then I began wiping most of the saliva away. I gave him back his handkerchief.
"I better go now" I said as I started walking away.
"Jim!" he said loudly and I turned around to face him "my name is Jim"
"Yeah, my name's Jack" I replied and then I made my way back to my car.
"Nice meeting you!" he yelled.
I really thought that it wasn't a good day for me. I mean, there was nothing else that could make it worse. How wrong I was. I was about to cross the street, since my car was on the other side of the street, when a car passed really fast and splashed the water of the puddle that was in front of me. I was completely drenched.
"Oh, come on!" I yelled as I wiped the dirt and water off my face. I just crossed the street and got into my car.
I took my coat off and put it in the back seat. I looked at my watch and noticed that it was already 7:45. I knew that I was going to be late for my brother's party. I drove off and went home.
I tried to drive as fast as I could, but it was rush hour so I took longer than expected. Minutes later I arrived at my place. I parked my car in the garage and then I ran into the house.
As soon as I opened the front door, I ran straight to my room. I wanted to get changed before I went to the party. As I passed by the living room, I noticed that both of my brothers were already dressed up.
"Jack!" Paul said as he noticed that I ran up to my room "we're really late now"
"I'll be down in a few seconds, I just need to get changed" I yelled from the top of the stairs as I made my way to my room.
"If you're not in the car in 10 minutes, we're leaving without you!!" Paul yelled and I heard the front door closing.
I just grabbed a suit from my closet and another pair of shoes. I quickly got changed and then I went into the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror and I looked terrible. I washed my face and then gelled my hair. I put some cologne on and then ran down the stairs towards the car.
Paul was already blowing the horn and as usual, was complaining. I just got in the car and then he drove off.
"I can't believe it" he said "we're gonna be late!"
"Calm down"
"Jack Brown, don't you tell me to calm down, you hear me!"
"Ok, ok" I told him and then I was silent the rest of the way. Paul kept scolding me all the way there. I just didn't pay attention to him. I just pulled my cd player from under my seat and then I put my headphones on and listened to some music.
My brother Paul was a great guy, but the only thing that annoyed him the most was unpunctuality. He could not stand being late somewhere. I, on the other hand, was not that punctual, and that's why we always had arguments.
I didn't even know why Paul had taken John and me to his party, since we had nothing to do with it. Paul said that it was going to be a party for models and people like that and he was hoping to get to be somebody's agent. John was happy because he said he wanted someone famous.
"I might get a date with a model" John said excited as we drove to the party
"Remember you've got a girlfriend" Paul stated
"Stop being such a goody-goody" John said to him "I won't do anything wrong, I just want to meet someone famous"
After a few minutes we arrived at the party. I could see that it was a fancy party since everybody was wearing suits and the women were wearing dresses and expensive jewelry.
The place itself was great too. It was a mansion, with enormous lit gardens and things like that. I just couldn't wait to get in. Paul parked the car right in front of the main entrance and then a valet came to park our car. Paul showed the invitation to the security man and then we went inside.
The mansion was so beautiful. It was nicely decorated and it had expensive chandeliers hanging from the ceiling. It had paintings on the walls which were very tasteful.
"Ok people" Paul said "mingle"
Right then, John and Paul went separate ways. I stayed where I was admiring the beautiful mansion. I wasn't sure which way to go, since I didn't know anyone.
I tried to make some conversation with a couple of people. The first person I began talking to was a woman, oh my god, she was so superficial. The only thing she could talk about was clothes and things related to clothes. Not saying that I'm a scholar or something like that, but her conversation was so boring and dull, that I quickly excused myself.
The other person I talked to was a man, he was not as superficial as the woman I had talked to, but he was so self-centered that it was nauseating. He only talked about how handsome he was and how tall he was. I don't know, there was something about him that I didn't like.
As I was talking to him, I noticed that there was a balcony and I wanted to check out the view from it, so I excused myself and walked over there.
The view from the balcony was great; you could see the whole city. I took my coat off and then I sat down on one of the chairs and admired the view. I stayed there for a while and a waiter came and offered me some champagne. I noticed that it was an expensive one. I wasn't sure who had arranged this party, but I was certain that it was a person with a lot of taste.
I turned around and looked at the party. I wasn't sure why, but I didn't feel comfortable being there. The people I had talked to were so...self involved and I wasn't. That's probably why I had not enjoyed talking to them. I decided to call it a night. I wanted to go home, but I knew I had to tell John or Paul before I left.
I walked back to the party and I spotted John first. He was talking to a group of women and I could see that he was having a great time, because they were all laughing. I walked closer to him and then I told him I was going to leave.
"Stay a little longer" he said as he excused himself a little bit from the women
"No, it's better if I leave" I reassured him
"Do you want me to drive you home?"
"No thanks, I'll take a cab" I told him and then I excused myself.
I walked back to the door and tried to see if I could find Paul so that I could tell him as well that I was leaving. I couldn't, so I walked out of the party. I was already at the main entrance when I realized I had forgotten my coat at the balcony.
`Damn' I thought as I walked back to the balcony to get it.
I noticed that my coat was still behind the chair I had sat on a few moments before. I picked it up and then I turned around and bumped into a man.
"Jack?"
"Jim?" I asked "I didn't recognize you without your big drooling dog"
"I barely recognize you" he replied and we both smiled
Jim was the guy that I had bumped into that afternoon at the park. He looked so different from what I remembered. While he was at the park, he was wearing a pair of shorts, a tank top and a cap. Now, he was wearing an expensive suit and his hair was gelled back. He looked great, I must say.
"So...you're a model"
"Yeah, supermodel" I told him in a sarcastic way
"I meant to say that I hope you're not a model. You're not like most men I see at these parties" he said in a deep voice "what is it you do?"
"I design clothes"
"Really?" he asked in amaze.
"Yeah, that's why I'm leaving" I said as I put my coat on
"I wish I could leave"
"Why? You seem like you are having a great time" I told him
"Well, my job consists of kissing ass and smiling while I do it. But that's not really me"
"So the split personality emerges" I said explaining his behavior "you're really two different people"
"You...could look at it that way" he replied smiling "we'd both like to talk to you" he said as he put his arm around the shoulder of an imaginary person. I thought it was really funny.
"Well, don't want to keep you two from the party" I said smiling
"Hey, as far as we're concerned, you're the party"
We sat there and we began talking about our lives and our backgrounds. He was actually a nice guy. he also from England, so we had that in common, even though he had been there a lot more often than I had. He was actually in the fashion business too, in fact, he was one of the most important people in the business. He was the agent of the most popular models. I wasn't sure why he had said that his job consisted of kissing ass, since he was probably the most important person in fashion at that moment...I wanted to know but I didn't dare to ask.
Anyway, we started talking about love and then he began talking about his last love. That's when I realized he was gay. We talked for about an hour or something like that...I lost track of time.
"But why did he leave you?" I asked interested "I mean, you're practically perfect" I was so surprised to see what I had just said and I tried to make it better "I mean, it sounds like you were a great couple"
"You know what my problem is?" he explained "I think everybody is basically good. Then I fall for them right away. But then I get disappointed"
"I know what you mean" I replied sighing.
"Not saying that I was ever the best boyfriend. Work kept me away for long hours. She thought it was dangerous"
"She thought the fashion business was dangerous?" I asked in disbelief.
"Dangerous...to my health. You know, stressful"
"Well, I'd hate to see something happen to you and I just met you" I told him without thinking what I was saying. He just smiled. I was about to correct what I had said but a man came out looking for Jim.
"There you are" the man said. Jim got up from his seat and then they moved away from me, but I could hear what they were saying "come back to the party man. There's someone I want you to meet"
"Ok, hold on a second" Jim told him and then he got closer to me
"Remember that ass I hate kissing? This is the worst" he whispered to me so that the man could not listen.
"I wouldn't know about it, but I'll take your word for it" I replied and we both smiled "hey, maybe we could meet again"
The word `date' kept flashing in my head. I was not planning on having a date with Jim, but he seemed to be such a nice guy that I wanted to get to know him better, not in a sentimental way, but just as friends...
"A date?" he asked "yeah, you know, actually my schedule's pretty crazy the nest few weeks"
"Yeah me too" I replied "I've got this big designing project"
"Good night Jack"
"Good night Jim" I told him and then he walked back to the party.
I stayed there a few more minutes thinking about what I had said to him. Had I actually asked him out? He probably understood it that way, but that was not my intention. I didn't worry about it too much since he had turned it down. I smiled at the thought of Jim. He was a great guy; he was smart, funny, and kind. I liked him a lot...
I walked back to the party and made my way to the front door. I noticed that my brothers were nowhere to be seen. I didn't worry too much about them, since they could take care of themselves.
There were a couple of cabs waiting at the entrance. I got in and the car was about to drive away when I heard Jim yelling.
"Jack!!!" he said as he ran out of the party.
"Stop the car" I told the driver and then I lowered the window
"I wanna...go...out with you" Jim said as he took out of his pocket a small thingy that I d don't know the name. I think it's an inhaler.
"Asthma?" I asked
"Only when I'm under stress" he explained "look, I usually hide my work...I mean, behind my work. So I don't hurt anyone, I mean, get hurt"
"I think we're both alike" I stated
"You mean inarticulate?" he asked and then we both smiled
"That's not really the word I was looking for" I told him smiling.
The next thing he did totally took me by surprise. He leaned in and then he kissed my lips. I was totally speechless. I wanted to say something but I couldn't. He then broke the kiss and ran inside again. The cab then drove away.
On my way home, I thought about the kiss and Jim. Even though he was a great guy and I liked him a lot. I was not ready to get into anything with anyone. I was still trying to get over Brian and I didn't want to hurt anyone else. I knew I had to explain my situation to Jim so that he would not get the wrong idea. I touched my lips with my finger and then I smiled at the thought of the kiss. I know it was not right, but I had liked it.
I knew that my life was going to change a lot from then on, but I had no idea how much it would...
Well folks, I hope you liked this chapter. I know it was a bit confusing at first to some of you.
Jack has tried to move on with his life and tried to live without Brian. He is not sure what he wants to do with his love life, but he is going to figure out soon...
As usual, send comments to:
jack_ga_2002@yahoo.com
Till the next one
Your friend, Jack "Enjoy life and always be yourself"