The Clincher Written by JM
** Disclaimer: Don't own em, don't know em, not factual. No harm, no foul. Please be at least the age of 18. **
Touch
I'll stand for nothing less
Or never stand again
These are the limits when one's buried
This body's left the soul
There was something amber sweet about early morning warmth. The tingling sensation on the sun peeking through curtains, drenching exposed areas of skin stirred emotions. A soft yawn arose and eyes did not have to blink open to know it was the crisp of the morning. For once, he didn't want to bury his head under a pillow and scamper away from the thought of starting another day. He wasn't overcome by that suffocating feeling of being alone and waiting on a phone call to either greet him or explain why there wasn't a long, mind-settling conversation the night before.
A hand scratched over his stomach and it wasn't his own. He moaned softly, body molding to another. He pushed back to feel a stomach to his back, smiling with his eyes still closed as a yawn was heard behind him. Linen sheets were barely covering portions of his lower body and he didn't reach down to remember that he was naked. He could feel it with every movement that caused a draft to ripple over his skin. He sighed with pleasure because being naked only reminded him of what happened only hours before.
He felt a nip at his shoulder and thought of where those teeth had nipped earlier. The pleasures of having sex on the floor in Justin Timberlake's bedroom christened his skin with new life. He didn't know what started it, but he knew it was around three or four in the morning and it definitely last an hour. It was probably his fault and he was willing to accept that. Justin was the one who started the scenario in the shower sometime before midnight and he knew Justin had barely recovered from that orgasm when his hand crept under Justin's boxers later in the night.
"Mmm," Justin moaned into his ear before kissing it. "Horny."
He laughed lowly, eyes barely blinking open as Justin's arms swallowed him and pulled him further back until he felt a semi-erect cock against the small of his back. He nuzzled his head back, stretching an arm and reaching back to run a hand over Justin's hair. He thought about turning to catch a view of those endearing blue eyes but he was sure Justin's eyes were probably still closed.
"Brian," Justin whined, a small swivel of his hips starting a grind he wanted to desperately continue in other ways.
"Remind me not to have sex with you in the middle of the night anymore," Brian snickered, shifting so the sheets tangled around their calves. "Still sore."
"Bet it was worth it," Justin mumbled, lips rubbing softly against the back of Brian's neck. He took in a quick whiff of Brian's hair, a lingering scent of oranges remaining. He kissed along Brian's neck, licking across the side as a hand slid leisurely down the muscles of Brian's stomach. He sighed pleasantly, fingertips feeling ripples and then a hint of softness before gracing wiry hairs.
"It's always worth it," Brian sighed out, arching his back slightly to feel the hardness pressing there. He licked his dry lips, eyes closing gradually as Justin's hand played around his hip. He felt his body tense some when he shifted his legs and he knew not to try anything acrobatic with Justin again.
"Want more," Justin cooed, rolling his hips to the left then slowly to the right. He shivered at the sensation before whispering, "please."
Brian was doing all that he could to slip away from that entrapment he fell into with Justin the night before. That cocoon of sexual desire was wrapping itself tightly around his skin and he was sure that was the reason his bottom lip was trembling. He tried to ease his breathing because Justin's hands were becoming restless below his navel.
"I swear you're like a sixteen year old who just started having sex," Brian snickered, arching his back. He felt his toes curl when Justin's fingers wrapped loosely around his erection. He pressed out a hiss through a clenched jaw and tried to keep his eyes open as Justin's lips played the sweetest symphony across the skin of his neck.
"And you're my boyfriend who didn't mind it so much last night," Justin whispered with a husky tone, intent of furthering his obvious effect on Brian's sexual drive. His tongue slid against soft skin and his lips kissed heavily at Brian's jaw. He pressed forward, easing most of his weight against Brian, finding the strength to kiss the corner of Brian's mouth. He eased back when he felt Brian shudder, a Cheshire smile playing across his red lips. His nose brushed against the hairs on the back of Brian's head.
"Are you using the boyfriend card on me?" Brian giggled, a hand reaching back and finding Justin's hip. He sighed pleasantly when Justin's hand danced off of his penis, purring quietly as he rolled onto his stomach, never moving too far from Justin. A gasp rippled from his lips when that hand skated under him and he felt wet fingers grip him and begin to stroke heatedly up and down his erection.
"Mmm," Justin mewled, a concurrence as a hand freely running down the course of Brian's bare back while his other stroked Brian in an unbalanced tempo. Fingertips danced against an arching spine and Justin tilted his head some to get a small glimpse of his hand moving lazily over Brian's erection when Brian bent his knees and raised from the floor just slightly.
Brian turned his head to get a glimpse of Justin watching him and it brought back too many wet, delicious memories of past occurrences. He rested his head on his forearm and choked back a moan as Justin's fingers massaged down to his cheeks, his middle finger swiping between them in a pressured fashion. He was finding it too difficult not to give in now. He chewed his bottom lip when Justin nipped at his shoulder and stared into his eyes.
"Can we fool around just a little," Justin requested, pressing gently at Brian's entrance with his finger. He smiled at the thundering reaction it drew.
Brian edged his legs apart and let one shift between Justin's legs. He pressed close to Justin, Justin's own erection throbbing against his hip. His arm reached and pulled Justin by the hip until he was half-laying on Brian and that heat, that reminiscent feeling of Justin's bigger frame against his made him want to roll Justin on top of him and restart their nocturnal activities.
Justin kissed at Brian's cheek when he got close enough. He sighed against Brian's chin when he felt delicate fingers run across the underside of his cock. He smiled to himself because he knew Brian was trying to ease into the thought of having sex again. He didn't know how much convincing he'd have to do but he'd willingly recite every word and moan they shared last night if it meant Brian's hand didn't leave his aching cock for another five minutes.
"The concept of sex in the morning, when I'm still sore, doesn't sound too bad," Brian giggled out, half-open eyes watching the way Justin's shut as he gave the crown of his cock a quick thumbing.
"It's not," Justin shuddered, "unheard of."
"Or maybe giving you a blowjob in the morning," Brian whispered, inching forward until his lips danced against the breath of Justin's. His tongue licked out and he tasted Justin's bottom lip. He felt the shudder this time, the shiver that caused Justin to grip one of his cheeks rather than trying to slide his finger inside of Brian.
"Head is nice," Justin agreed, eyes batting open. He tried to kiss Brian but his body was too caught up in rapture and he could only peck erratically. "Head from you is wonderful."
"Yeah," Brian hummed, turning to his side before scooting forward until they were chest to chest, cock to cock. He rolled his hips pleasantly while kissing at Justin's chin. He felt a wetness between them and wasn't sure if it was his or Justin's, but he liked the feeling and use the precome for lubrication. "Or maybe I can suck you while you sucked me."
Justin whimpered at the suggestion, grabbing onto Brian's hips to still him. He felt Brian's tongue play along the base of his neck while he did a natural pull and retract motion with his hips. His fingers squeezed at Brian's waist and he didn't know if he'd make it any further than the words Brian was sprouting out. He was breathing through his nose because unclenching his jaw would release loud moans that would echo against the walls of his bedroom and probably send D or Lorenzo bursting through the door for fear he was dying.
"Teasing is good but," Justin trembled while speaking, hands sliding back to grip Brian's ass. He pulled Brian firmly against him and tried to duck his head to look into his lover's eyes. He smiled when Brian stared up at him with an open mouth before whispering, "executing is better."
Brian was wedged in to nodding. Finding creative or even useful words were becoming difficult because Justin was daring to toy with his hole again and his teeth were raking against the skin of Brian's shoulder. His own hands were struggling between grabbing Justin's hips and traveling upward across the muscled expanse of his back. He treaded fingertips against freckles he knew existed and a tattoo that he had once spent at least three minutes tracing with his tongue while they rested lazily in the bathtub.
"Maybe if I just," Justin let his words trail off as his lips waltzed happily across Brian's chest, hoisting the smaller man up. He smiled when Brian's legs attempted to wrap around his midsection while his kissed at Brian's stomach. He let his tongue roll around Brian's navel before dipping inside, hands trying to hold Brian steady as Brian shuddered on his side.
Justin was swift in his motions, turning Brian onto his back while his hands gently pried Brian's legs open. He took in a deep breath of Brian's scent while his lips pecked at Brian's abdomen. His teeth rake softly against Brian's hipbone while his large hands pressed against inner thighs. He could feel Brian's feet being firmly planted on the ground on either side of him. He was quick in stripping away the linen from the floor and tossing it backward, uncaring to its landing. He felt one of Brian's hands on the back of his head and he knew it was encouraging. It didn't direct, but Justin felt fingertips pressing against his scalp and they were persuasive as he attempted to lick his way further south.
Knocking. Kicking. Hands slapping helplessly against a door.
"Daddy! Justin!"
The voice broke through the sensuality of the morning air and left Justin to giggle, Brian's erection throbbing against his chin with his face pressed into Brian's stomach. He felt the muscles in Brian's stomach ripple as a sigh was released from Brian's body. Justin did his best to press feathery-light kisses against Brian's stomach, easing up as the pounding became a little more intense.
"Daddy, I wanna go to the pool! You said today!"
"Somebody's awake," Justin snickered, dreamily kissing at Brian's chest while Brian's hands restlessly gripped his shoulders. He could feel Brian casually trying to persuade him lower again but he shrugged Brian off with a grin, kissing at Brian's neck.
"Daddy! Pool!"
A calmer knock followed the banging and Justin peeked his head up. He was thankful Brian remembered to lock the door the night before. He circled one of Brian's nipples with his finger while glancing at the door, curious as to the other person who had now joined Baylee Littrell on the other side. He felt Brian rearranging beneath him but didn't bother to look down.
"One of you two better come out here and get this Teenage Mutant Ninja Terror. Uncle Trace didn't get in until four this morning and I'm truly not in the mood for morning cartoons."
Justin shook his head at the sound of Trace Ayala. Trace had never been great with mornings, especially not after his more recent trips out clubbing. Occupying a room so close to the one Baylee slept in while Brian slept in Justin's room probably did nothing for Trace's obvious hangover but it didn't bother Justin any. He warned Trace, even offered to let his best friend reside on one of the couches downstairs for the night but he was sure Trace was too drunk when he stumbled in to remember Baylee and Brian were even present in Justin's house.
"Justin! Come on!"
Justin sighed, turning his attention to Brian who laid quietly with a hand over his eyes and body still fully exposed. A grin pulled at Justin's lips while he traced the edges of Brian's face. He lowered himself until he laid atop of Brian, pressing his weight on his elbows so that he didn't smother Brian. He toyed with the ends of Brian's blonde bangs, studying the way Brian's jaw remained stiff and his breathing quiet. Justin could feel the irritation emitting from Brian's body and it was uncommon. Brian was never one to give into sexual needs or seek privacy amongst the chaos. Justin fought with a frown, pressing a gentle kiss to Brian's lips before trying to roll away. A hand on his hip, loose in its grip, prevented him.
"I'll make this up to you later," Brian whispers, slowly drawing away his hand so that Justin can glance at his soft blue eyes.
Justin was quick to shoot him a peculiar look, adding, "it's not your fault."
Brian nods but his hand is still on Justin's waist and he's refusing to relinquish control to the thoughts that tell him to move forward. He reaches up to steal a brief kiss and laughs when Justin lingers with his pouty lips so close to his own. "I promise I'll make it up to you."
Justin fought against arguing with Brian. There was too much gentleness in his face and he wanted to escape to other venues in his mind rather than explain to Brian why he was not responsible for their interruption or why it didn't trouble Justin. He opted to reply to Baylee instead, a hand cupping Brian's dimpled cheek. "I'll be out in a second Lil' Bit."
"The kid hasn't even had sugar yet. Seriously, Brian, I'm considering Ritalin," Trace called through the door and Justin stifled a laugh while Brian attempted to roll to one side beneath Justin. Justin pressed a kiss to Brian's shoulder and sighed, rolling off of Brian with a grin.
"Catch a shower B. I'll go entertain Baylee for awhile," Justin insisted, patting the space between Brian's shoulder blades. He waited for some form of acknowledgement from Brian and faltered when he didn't receive it. He scooted forward, resting his chin on Brian's arm, curious to Brian's distance. He stumbled a little when Brian raised his arm but settled into a pleased state when that arm fell back and around his neck, cuddling him closer to Brian's smaller body.
"We're like the complete opposite of the Cosby family," Brian mumbled out, still staring at the floor rather than Justin.
Justin shook his head and rolled his eyes. He pressed his chin into Brian's ribcage and replied, "the Cosby family B? Seriously, can we at least find something in the twenty-first century?"
Brian chuckled quietly, fingers tingling under the touch of Justin's buzzed hair. He heard a few more knocks from Baylee and thought to respond, offer some kind of warning to his son. He halted when he heard Justin add, "wait, you think of us as a family? I mean, like, a family-family."
Justin felt uncomfortable when Brian shifted and caught himself before his chin hit the floor when Brian skated from beneath him. He watched Brian roll away and snatch up a pair of boxers from the floor. Justin wasn't sure whose they were and thought he probably shouldn't worry about that when his boyfriend was stumbling away from where he lay without saying anything. He considered calling out to Brian as he strolled to the bathroom, maybe dashing after him because it wasn't that he minded the comparison. The idea of he, Brian, and Baylee with the addition of Trace, D and Lorenzo being a family troubled him none. But it was unexpected, like Brian's departure, and it left Justin with nothing to say.
Could we have known
Never would I, helped to nail down
Brian scratched at the skin beneath his orange T-shirt as he walked into the kitchen. His bare feet adjusted quickly to the coolness of the hardwood floor as he hiked up the legs of his jeans so that he did not stumble on them. His hand lifted from his chest to the back of his neck, massaging the tense muscles as he surveyed the occupants of Justin's kitchen.
He spotted D and Trace occupying the table in the corner, conversing while staring out the patio window toward the California sun. Trace was tapping the end of a cigarette against the wooden table while tapping the fingers of his free hand against the rim of a glass of orange juice. He watched Lorenzo weave throughout the kitchen while chatting on his cell phone. Baylee sat on a tall stool, munching on a bowl of cereal while watching the others talk casually. He suspected that Justin was the one who got Baylee dressed some time within the period that he was in the shower and getting semi-dressed himself.
Brian let his blue eyes fall on Justin. He took in a quick breath, lost in his own emotions when looking at Justin. The younger man was leaning peacefully on the island directly opposite of Baylee, a quiet expression glazing his face while his finger tapped an unknown melody against the cool marble countertop. His head was bowed, his eyes watching his hands rather than Baylee was Baylee attempted to start a feeble conversation with him. Brian breathed in the scent of Justin's cologne, the faint fragrance weaving through the air. He thought to loop his fingers into the belt loops of Justin's cargo shorts or run his hands over the soft fabric of Justin's button down shirt but he abstained.
"Daddy, are we going to the pool?" Baylee questioned loudly, spooning another mouthful of cereal into his mouth. He looked up at Brian with bright eyes and a tilted head.
Brian wasn't quick to respond, shaken when Justin peered over his shoulder at Brian. He shoved his hands into his pockets and sighed, taking a few nervous steps toward Justin until he was behind him. He ducked his head when Justin shuffled to the side and stared at him with a curious expression.
"I'll put you down quicker than you can think of his name if you upset the kid," Lorenzo warned halfheartedly, nudging Brian as he passed. He gave Brian a quick, polite glare before turning to Justin to add, "Timberlake, Annie and your moms will be here in about half an hour. Make sure you and Ayala are good to go because we've got a full day and I want to get out there before too many of those damn camera freaks find us."
Justin nodded, still looking at Brian with a half-tilted expression. He rubbed the end of his nose and only jumped slightly when Baylee began to tap the edge of his bowl with his spoon. He twisted his lips and sighed when Brian's eyes fell away to his son, letting his own focal point fall on Baylee.
"Daddy?"
"Joey said he's been blowing up your phone B. Says he's been trying to reach you about coming over," Trace noted, rising from the table. He slid the cigarette behind his ear while playing with his lighter. He watched the flame flicker in and out as he strolled through the kitchen, oblivious to the look he received from the others.
"I didn't know you guys still had a play date for the kids," Justin remarked and Brian could help but flounder toward that sparkle that grated its way through Justin's scratchy voice. He turned his head, caught off guard by the strong scent of coffee and he wasn't quite sure when Justin had poured him a cup but he was well aware of its existence when he glanced down to the steaming cup in front of him. He smiled fondly, lifting his eyes back to Justin who stared openly and with wild curiosity.
"Kinda. We've been communicating about it and I told him when Bay and I would be out here," Brian replied, shrugging before pulling the mug closer to him. He lifted it to take in a closer breath of the strong aroma, eyes squinting as he blew off the steam and glanced at Justin.
"Dude you might as well call it a play date for you because Joe's place is fucking killer," Trace chimed, scrubbing his fingers through Baylee's hair while grinning at Brian. He snorted when Baylee jerked away with a cry of displeasure.
"Language," Justin warned Trace before turning his head back to Brian. "I'm sure Lil' Bit will have a great time. Joey's always got kids over there."
Brian nodded before taking a slow sip of his coffee, trying to examine the lines in Justin's forehead or the way his eyebrows sat so calmly. He admired the slow twitch of a smile that tried to fondle its way across Justin's red lips. He watched way too long lashes bat non-defensively and just the faintest speckles of blush settle its way against Justin's cheeks when he realized Brian was marveling at him.
"You two should probably get a move on before Lynn gets here anyway," Trace advised, eyeing Brian more than Justin. He was aware that while Lynn knew of Brian's existence and purpose in Justin's life, they had never formally discussed anything concerning the relationship in person. A few awkward, uncontested phone calls were shared but nothing that would require Brian being a victim of questioning and vivid explanations that would leave Justin's mother speechless rather than distrusting.
"Yeah, to the pool," Baylee cheered, pushing his empty bowl forward before slipping down from the stool. "Daddy, give Justin a kiss."
Baylee's insistent words surprised Justin, leaving him to glance around the island to watch Baylee dash by before turning to peek a look at Brian and Justin. He threw his hands up dramatically and Justin forced himself to stifle a laugh. He turned his eyes on Brian who stared at Baylee curiously, still sipping his coffee.
"Oh wow, the kid's serious," Trace deadpanned, leaning next to Justin against the island. "You two need to stop mackin' in front of the little tot."
Justin was quick to elbow his friend, a blind reaction as he continued to stare with wonder at Baylee. He listened to the mild chuckle from Trace and D, rolling his eyes promptly and avoiding eye contact with Brian. He didn't know if Baylee's request was seen as a positive or negative by his father and Justin wasn't sure he wanted to seek out his own thoughts.
"Daddy," Baylee whined, stomping through the kitchen until he reached Brian. He yanked on his father's pant leg, offering his best effort to pull him in the direction Baylee was trying to walk to. "Kiss so we can go to the pool."
"For a kid, who is all of the age of four, to recognize that his father isn't with his mother anymore but instead is in a relationship with someone else is fascinating. But for him to also recognize that his father is in a relationship with another man and not have fault with it, in fact, for him to find joy in his father's significant other and to want them to openly display their affection as a sign of parting or period is inspiring and should not be denied," Lorenzo declared, his voice deep but carrying a biting touch of honesty. He turned his focus toward Brian with wide eyes. "Kiss him."
"Pussy," Trace snorted out and he was quick to dodge Justin's arm before his elbow implanted itself into Trace's chest again. He scooted away from the island and peeled the cigarette from behind his ear. He rolled it between his thumb and index finger while shrugging out, "Do it but I'm not watching."
Justin wanted to linger in the words from Lorenzo, find sudden grace in the encouragement from his best friend, meander away from that desperate look that was hollowing out Baylee's blue eyes, but the sudden presence of Brian in front of him hampered all disillusion and left him frolicking with a absentminded feeling. He breathed in a trivial but existent smile, tried to read thoughts through quiet blue eyes. A cautious hand was on his hip and there was Baylee right there, patting his leg with never-ending innocence. Justin thought to push back Brian's bangs, tangle his fingers in thin blonde hair and forget all of that distance they had created earlier without even trying. He resigned to lace his fingers in Baylee's hair instead while still teetering in the welcome feeling Brian's eyes gave him.
"You look nice," Brian said with a raised brow, eyes shifting over Justin's appearance. He leaned a little closer.
"I look normal," Justin jested, his lips pouting just slightly before his tongue rolled over them to wet them. He didn't know why he did it, but he liked the way it caught Brian's attention.
"Shut up," Brian insisted and refused to let protest border on Justin's lips. He swept in and closed his eyes, lips capturing Justin's and holding fast. There was a muffled moan in there somewhere, a short gasp of pretense that was relinquished and Brian tilted his head just enough to get a proper kiss. He leveled himself with the angle because Justin was taller and he was reaching. He didn't lose color or feeling and that slow roll down his spine left his fingers tingling when Justin's lips moved against his.
"Score one for the monster," Trace joked, playfully squeezing Baylee's shoulder and he winked at Baylee when Baylee took his eyes away from his father kissing Justin.
"I have plans to kill you tonight Trace," Brian mumbled, lips still so close to Justin's that he could taste them with the tip of his tongue. He reached up for another kiss, putting aside burning thoughts from the morning to revel in physical contact with Justin. He melted under the touch of Justin's hand on his cheek, trying not to lounge too long in the kiss.
"I'll have to pencil you in between getting shit-faced and whooping D's ass in Halo 2 but I'm sure it can be arranged," Trace chuckled, easing away from Baylee.
"Language," Brian and Justin noted simultaneously and they found themselves too caught up in laughter to continue their kiss, backing away in a hesitant motion with eyes on each other.
"Freaks," Trace murmured while pulling open the patio doors, his cigarette already resting between his lips with his lighter raised.
"Your mother will be here soon," Brian noted quietly, his thumb swiping across Justin's bottom lip. He let it rest against Justin's chin as the younger man nodded. He inched away from Justin with a grin, Baylee still firmly clinging to his jeans.
"Promise me you'll call me at least twenty times while you're at Joey`s crib," Justin requested with a paler smile, his lower lip finding its way between his teeth once his words had cleared his throat.
"Twenty five if you're good," Brian chimed, watching the way a crooked grin folded across Justin's lips. He laughed softly, debating leaving Justin's sight. Etching the image of that smile into his memory was easy but enjoying its fullness was much simpler in person. He fought against protests from Baylee before finally turning away and walking out of the kitchen.
Careful of drifting off
Now losing taste and touch
Turning a pale blue, leaning in to say
This body's left the soul
Lemonade was painted against his palate. The sun was more than warming but far from being overbearing against his skin or swelling to the point he was sweating profusely. The faint scent of chlorine filtered through the aroma of grass and some form of barbeque that he had yet to taste. The echoing sound of children nearby, offbeat tempo of whistling behind him, and his own humming drummed against his ears. His eyes were closed, if only briefly, but he could still see images of Justin behind his eyelids. He smiled at the thought. He was cornered between accepting the awkward acknowledgment of his son finding interest in his relationship with Justin while trying to define the dynamics of his family life with Baylee and Justin's existence in it.
"So Brian... things are rather official, huh?"
Brian turned his head to the sound of Joey's voice, eyes running over the way Joey stood behind a barbeque pit with peering eyes that were gentle yet questioning. He turned slightly in his chair, resting his upper body weight o one of the arms while pondering Joey's inquiry. He thought to nod but knew it would be impetuous.
"Official?"
"Geez, you're his boyfriend now. It's a real life relationship with the whole white picket fence and shit," Joey gushed, twirling a fork around for dramatic emphasis.
"Oh," Brian replied, mouth barely open and he knew he should've been more articulate but he was too busy contemplating the proper explanation in his head.
"Oh? Seriously?" Joey pondered, folding his arms with a smile.
Brian shrugged before releasing a small laugh. He stood and scratched the back of his head, still hovering on the right words to say to Joey. "Yeah, he's my boyfriend but its not like we're buying a house in Laguna Beach, getting a dog and raising our kids together."
"But you're kind of raising one child together," Joey remarked, his head nodding in the direction of Baylee wadding in the pool with his daughter and his brother Steve. He spotted Brian's hesitance toward the subject before it fully manifested. "Sore subject I suppose."
"Not necessarily," Brian interjected quickly, walking toward Joey. He found safety in the shaded area and exhaled lowly, preparing himself. "You know I care about Justin, sincerely."
Joey nodded, flipping a burger without looking. He continued to peer at Brian with just a slight glint of suspicion. "Yeah, see we've already established you're a good guy. Me and the other guys, well maybe barring Lance, already discussed your potential in this situation. So why do I feel like there's a `but' coming?"
"Realistically Joey?" Brian pondered aloud and he wasn't ashamed when he openly looked at Joey with a wrinkled brow and a sullen air in his eyes.
Joey eyed him for a second before turning his attention back to the barbeque. "Dude, there is always going to be bullshit attached to being a celebrity, especially when it comes to one Justin Timberlake, but come on. Tell me he's not great with your son or that these feelings you've got for him aren't starting to border on deeper than just caring for him."
Brian took a quick glance over to Baylee, watched the way his son splashed around with Brianna. He scratched the back of his head once more, unsettled by his own mental debate. He wanted to wrestle with Joey's words, find the one misstep in Joey's statement and run with it. It became difficult when Brian sunk into the reality of his own overwhelming emotions pertaining to Justin.
"Okay, is there a keg here? And I can I get my steak medium rare or just rare. I'm trying out for the next role in one of Joss Whedon's vampire shows."
Brian didn't have to turn to the sound of an unexpected voice. He knew its owner, though he contemplated its origin for only a few seconds before Chris Kirkpatrick skipped into view. He laughed under his breath when Chris immediately threw his arms around Joey's neck for a goofy hug. He stifled his laugh when observing Joey's displeased expression. A feign hand slap on Chris' back from Joey separated them and Brian folded his arms to watch the friends interact.
"Chris, not that I don't mind the Anti-Christ making a visit unexpectedly on a day that I wanted to vie for sainthood, but what are you doing here?" Joey questioned with an arched eyebrow and the fork in Joey's hand separating them.
"Uncle Chris!"
"Bri-an-na!" Chris shouted back, waving incessantly toward Joey's daughter.
He turned back to Joey with a sly grin when Joey waved the fork at him. He swatted at the fork before laughing out, "there was a question somewhere about my existence and a deity of some sort?"
"What the fuck are you doing here?" Joey hissed out, a forcibly dry smile on his lips.
"Wow, language daddy," Brian snickered, lifting a glass of lemonade from the table nearby. He took a small sip before finding Chris eyes on him, a softer smile buried in his wild expression. Brian shrugged and offered a tiny wave for Chris.
Chris jerked his head in Brian's direction, sliding his hands into the pockets of his shorts while tapping a flip flop-covered foot on the ground. "Are you kidding Joe? My friend B'trell is in town and you didn't even bother to give me a holler and tell me he would be at your place? I had to find out from B'trell's boyfriend?"
Brian cleared his throat and gave Chris a quick once over. He had thought of calling Chris when he arrived back in LA, even considered calling JC. He hesitated, only phoned Joey through a need to accomplish a compliment, but that was all. He wanted time with Justin. He needed it because too many nights and too many weekends had been spent not having time with Justin. He sought that more than trying to build bridges with Justin's friends.
"The gossip mills must be running rampant," Joey replied sarcastically, turning his attention back to the grill.
"Fuck yeah," Chris retorted, shifting on his heels to face Brian. He thumped Brian on his forehead and snickered when Brian groaned. "And why must I have to call Justin to know you're alive? You're a rising star in the Billboard game, why don't you have people who can call my people and tell me that my youngest best friend now has someone to call `boyfriend'?"
"I should have people?" Brian questioned, glancing at Chris and then briefly Joey. He simulated pondering the thought before taking another healthy gulp of his lemonade.
"People who need people," Joey sung, grinning at Brian.
"Definitely people who could tell me why you both looked so damn serious when I came tap dancing by," Chris confirmed, taking careful glances between Chris and Brian.
"Our young little grasshopper is having a dilemma concerning said relationship. He is having trouble voicing concerns about whether or not he should think of his status with JT as a family affair due to their newness to this whole thing," Joey explained halfheartedly. He poked at a few of the sizzling steaks before tilting his head to give Brian an honest smile. He wasn't troubled by Brian's glare or disturbed expression.
"Uh, young? I think he's older than you," Chris remarked and his words were followed by a nod from Brian.
"What about the relationship?" Joey questioned.
Chris licked the corner of his mouth before adding, "I mean he's older than JC too. And you make him sound like Lance with this whole `I'm gay and don't know its repercussions' spiel."
"Focus here," Joey insisted, his voice firm.
"So no white picket fence?" Chris inquired, looking at Brian again.
Brian raised his brow at Chris, stumped by Chris` seriousness. "Do you two share a brain or something?"
"Part a deal we made with God to get Lance in good with NASA and Justin to go back to Britney," Chris chimed. He muted his own laughter with a sigh, dragging his fingers through his brown hair. "As you can see it was a pretty lousy deal but we're banking on Him to make it up to us come Christmas 2010."
Joey poked Chris with the blunt end of his fork and shook his head. He lifted a beer bottle and took a quick swig, rubbing the perspiration that slinked down the sides across his forehead. "No jokes about our higher power in front of Choir Boy."
Brian knew Joey's reflexes weren't fast enough. He quickly hurled an ice cube from his glass at Joey, giggling when it splattered against Joey's forehead. He threw his hands up in mock surrender when Joey howled and aimed the fork at Brian. He took in his lower lip when Chris shook his head at him, a grin substituting his laughter.
"So you're adjusting to this relationship nicely, I see," Chris beamed.
Brian shrugged, easing back to his seat from earlier. He propped his feet up on a nearby chair, sighing softly. "Every moment with Justin is worth it. It's just weird trying to put Baylee and Justin into this whole equation without feeling like I'm thrusting a family on Justin or forcing my son to understand what it's like for daddy to have a boyfriend instead of a mommy when his father is still adjusting to the whole concept himself."
"So a shorter definition would be: no white picket fence," Joey maintained, forking the meat from the grill. He took another gulp of his Corona while peering at Chris. He shrugged when Chris nodded toward him.
"This could ruin Justin's career if anybody found out," Brian contended, his voice losing that heavy humor to fall into a concerned one.
"So could a bad song or another impromptu duet with Janet Jackson," Chris argued with a smile, leaning on the table hidden behind him. "From the communication I do have with Justin or from what I get from the guys, it's totally worth it when it comes to you because it has settled Justin into a situation where he feels needed and he feels what he does is worth it on a personal level rather than a professional one."
"He's definitely needed," Brian added lowly, taking a glance toward Baylee as he escaped the pool and waddled toward a towel. A quiet smile pressed onto Brian's lips as he watched his son.
"I don't think Justin feels like he's been forced into any parental role. Out of the five of us, Justin's probably one of the better ones suited to be a father outside of Joey. I'm too spastic, JC is too career-oriented, and Lance is too anal to handle the role of father. But Justin has that natural thing going where he's meant to be with kids and meant to be good with them," Chris affirmed. He plucked the half-empty bottle of beer from between Joey's fingers and took a quick swallow. "So in pecking order, Justin's the next to raise a kid since Joey's already doing a good job at the father thing."
Joey lightly jabbed Chris' arm, grinning with pride he rarely showed. He let his attention return to Brian when Chris stuck his tongue out at him and offered the bottle back.
"I guess it's just fear of the unknown," Brian pondered and he was quick to open his arms to Baylee when his son shyly scampered over to him. Brian wrapped the large towel his son carried around him, scrubbing it through Baylee's damp hair before letting Baylee recline in his arms.
"Oh please, human nature is a B-I-T-C-H, and since it would seem you've already been married to one, you'll be just fine," Chris declared, his voice lacking trepidation. He gained strength when Joey raised his bottle in a sign of concurrence.
"On some frightful level of oddness, you've gotten our approval. It's gotta be worth it," Joey noted.
Chris nodded briskly, shrieking when Brianna wrapped her wet form around one of his legs. He patted her head and tried to shake away. "Yeah B'trell, you're boning one of the better looking members of the group. Might as well start putting up that fence cause Justin's so filling that fatherly role."
Joey put a little more force behind his punch this time, carting his daughter away from Chris when his friend jumped back in pain. He shook his head at Chris, squinting his eyes while preserving an undaunted grin. "Not.
Meant. To. Raise. Kids."
"Tattooed on my ass, thanks," Chris cheered and he was quick to run when an ice cube flew past his nose and a fork was already in mid-flight toward him.
The brain needs oxygen
Can't sneak around this bait
His catacomb has got me by the chin
This body's left the soul
There was a fondness growing in him for the quiet that surrounded him in the kitchen. He enjoyed every moment of being in the presence of Joey and Chris, taking in their jokes and finding a permanent reason to seek out their friendship. He found comfort in the automatic bond that Brianna and Baylee created. There was a joy taken in the fact that his cell phone vibated several times during the day with phone calls from Justin. He even smiled when Justin called just to say "hello" even though they had spoken five minutes prior.
But there was something about living in the silence that relaxed him. He didn't have to run to a room in Justin's house, lock the door, and just breathe. The house was still empty with the exception of D, who was too busy sleeping in the screening room, and Baylee who was upstairs watching a Jimmy Neutron DVD Justin had purchased a few weeks before.
He scooped a lump of vanilla ice cream from a carton, dropping it into a bowl. He wasn't concentrated on the activity. The occasional thought of hurrying crossed his mind so that he could return to sitting with his son in one of the guest rooms and watching the DVD with him. He lost those thoughts when he thought about Justin. The occasional text message had come to his phone since their last phone call but nothing lengthy or personal enough for Brian to feel that warmth he was missing. After awhile, the messages and phone calls stopped and Brian was just there. He was just in Justin's house wondering when Justin might return and why the communication that made him feel as if he was apart of Justin's day suddenly didn't exist.
He sighed softly, dropping another, smaller scoop into the bowl. He thought to go feed the dogs he could hear barking from afar. He considered reaching across the island and grabbing his phone, sending Justin a quick message to ease his own distress or calling his mother to find some homebound comfort. It was late and he contemplated crawling into Justin's bed, falling asleep while waiting for Baylee to stumble his way inside and drift off to sleep in the bed with him.
The echoing sound of laughter, strong voices, and feet clattering on the marble floors of Justin's home drew his mind away from those soothing thoughts. There were jokes about some waitress thrown back and forth and comments about a song heard on the radio that was sure to be a hit somewhere in Middle America. The sound of keys jiggling came closer and while he tried not to listen to every word spoken, he could make out Justin's voice in a crowd of hundreds. He tried to counterpart the remaining voices with the ones he knew but was too focused on the nervous sensation that rippled through him when he got a quick glimpse of Justin standing in the foyer to the kitchen.
"Man, I'm so ready to crash but there are appearances to be made, chicks to win over," Trace announced, stepping into the kitchen before Justin could. He gave Brian a quick glance before smiling knowingly. "The life of a famous man. I swear it's rough B."
Brian laughed lowly, shaking his head at Trace while stuffing the carton of ice cream back into the freezer. He turned back to find Justin standing at the island, a solemn smile coating his lips with eyes that spoke of another story. He arched an eyebrow toward Justin. It wasn't the welcome he was anticipating and one that left him closer to the cold rather than the warmth he wanted with Justin.
"Dude, I already had some dessert but if that's for me I'm so going to owe you one when I get the munchies later," Trace chimed, clapping a hand over Brian's shoulder while reaching for the bowl of ice cream. Brian was quick to slide it away.
"It's for Baylee, Trace. He's upstairs," Brian retorted, a faint smile parting for Trace. He fished a spoon out of a nearby bowl and let it drop into the bowl. His eyes fluttered back to Justin. He was slightly distracted by the way Justin spun his cell phone on the island, an obvious nervous reaction to Brian's staring. He intentionally reached out and cupped Justin's hand over the phone, stopping the circling and Justin's eyes went a little wide as if in disbelief and Brian tried to read further into the reaction.
"Miss me?" Justin asked quietly, his voice settling somewhere above a whisper. He pulled his hand back, Brian's phone along with it, and remained relatively still under Brian's gaze.
Brian wanted the opportunity to reply sarcastically, pull Justin away and out of the kitchen to find out why their conversations had suddenly stopped but he was halted by the sound of an almost foreign voice. He arched an eyebrow and nearly knocked the bowl of ice cream from the island with surprise when he caught a view of the owner of the voice. He saw tight blonde curls cut into a short hairdo with a face so recognizable that Brian nearly choked on the lump that solidified in his throat.
"Honey, you and Trace are going to have to stop expecting me to carry all of these leftovers bags or expecting Lorenzo to do it. You're just too grown for that."
That rolling country accent mixed with a hint of California dialect sounded a little more familiar when Brian watched her march through the kitchen. It was a voice he often heard in the background, usually from a cell phone. It wasn't one he had heard directed at him too many times, maybe more so recently, but not often. He tried not to stiffen, tried to remain as ambiguous as he was when Justin first entered the kitchen.
"Making my way downtown," Trace sung out, hastily trying to exit the kitchen but not before patting Brian on the back with a smugness that Brian didn't have to contemplate to interpret. "I'll take that lecture in written form tomorrow Lynn. Thanks!"
Brian wished Trace hadn't made an obvious gesture toward him when leaving. Partly because it drew attention to him and then her eyes, a mirror of Justin's deep blue ones, were on him and Brian swallowed quick. He fumbled with a smile that didn't come out quite right and he resided to standing silently instead of forcing his politeness.
There she was, a few feet from him, smiling in some fashion that made Brian question its honesty and he was now wishing for something louder than the silence he pleasured in earlier. Something about the way she leaned on the counter and tilted her head to examine he the way he knew he would left Brian unbalanced. He wished Justin would say something, anything to make it easier on him because he wasn't prepared for this. He wasn't warned about Lynn, Justin's mother, accompanying them back to Justin's house and Brian being purged into the uncomfortable situation of being face to face with his boyfriend's mother. But, then again, he didn't know if Justin would be his boyfriend by the end of the night if Lynn didn't approve.
"Well you're a quiet one," Lynn said matter-of-factly, smiling with that unbridled smugness that Brian mostly saw from Trace, occasionally Justin.
Brian choked back embarrassment, though he could already feel his cheeks flushing. He cleared his throat before replying, "hi."
"Oh, honey, we've got a live one," Lynn boasted, her head cocking in Justin's direction with that same haughty grin.
Justin offered a grin, nervous in nature, for his mother. He walked to the other side of the island, lifting the bowl from the counter while slipping a hand in the back pocket of Brian's jeans. He smiled when Brian jumped a little, easing until he was close enough that his chin brushed against Brian's ear. He felt Brian turning toward him and there was an expression of fear wrecking Brian's usual glow. He pressed a kiss to Brian's cheek before whispering, "I'll take this up to Baylee."
Brian thought to grab Justin's arm, stop him from moving and leaving him. He didn't. He let Justin move away, tried to capture that smile Justin offered him that was supposed to be reassuring but it left more uncertainty in Brian rather than security. And that fear was burning his skin with every second, his heart finding a faster pace when he turned back to Lynn.
"See it's not so bad. He gave you a kiss in front of me and I didn't even bother to yell," Lynn noted, still smiling.
"Maybe you forgot?" Brian stuttered out and tried to find consolation in the laugh from Lynn that followed.
"I can see he definitely likes you for your sense of humor. I think that was one of the main reasons he stayed with Cameron for so long," Lynn remarked, leaning with both arms on the cold surface of the island.
Brian nodded and didn't know why because he thought it might've been a backhanded compliment. He chewed on his lower lip, thoughtful in the way he gave her a small smile.
"And you're a cute one. Exotic in a way that doesn't require a facade to see. I can see why he spent so much of the day trying to reach you rather than focusing on shopping for clothes or jewelry or taking care of rather important business matters," Lynn added with a snort.
"Really?" Brian questioned because it, on some self-righteous level, felt good to know Justin thought of him that much.
"He's always been a fan of dating older people, you know, with the exception of Britney," Lynn said, letting her eyes drift from Brian for a mere moment. "I watched that little girl grow up and I watched Justin grow beyond her. Though you look nothing like your age. There's something youthful about the way you look but still mature about your demeanor, unlike Cameron."
Brian laughed lowly, twisting his lips into a small smirk. "You weren't much of a fan of hers, were you?"
"It's a scary thought, you know," Lynn declared, peering at Brian and avoiding his previous remark. "The thought that your son might be gay, especially after twenty-something odd years of him chasing after pretty girls and working so damn hard to be this worldwide celebrity thing. The uncertainty of it all is a little nerve-wracking on so many different levels."
Brian didn't nod this time because there was nothing cryptic about Lynn's words this time. She was making an obvious statement though Brian tried not to accept it. It burned a little too much against his chest and he was willingly ready for the worse rather than the pleasantness he got from Chris and Joey.
"But you're a parent, right?" Lynn questioned, already aware of the answer but she still waited for a small nod from Brian. "I'm sure you could imagine the fear of knowing that something your son never showed any kind of interest in before suddenly became part of his world and he thinks its for the best. I'm sure you can imagine the dangers you'd fear for him."
"So you're saying it's dangerous for Justin to date me?" Brian asked too quickly and he wanted to regret it but he was speaking from an honest place that refused to let him take any steps backwards.
"It's dangerous for Justin to date anyone in the world of entertainment, period," Lynn rebutted, leaning off the counter to lower her purse onto it. She drug her fingers through her hair, unfurling it before adding, "especially trying to date another male."
Brian nodded because it felt familiar. Somewhere, on some television, this scenario had already been played out and he was certain he was supposed to lose this battle or just walk away from it before it reached anything resembling a climax. He scratched the back of his head, his hand sliding down to hold the back of his neck in some comforting fashion. He twitched his nose but kept his eyes focused on Lynn.
"So I should've been wiser about my actions concerning all of this?" Brian pondered, refusing to be sheepish.
"He's not gay," Lynn stated, shaking her head while maintaining that somewhat stern gaze. "He's into you, yes, but not gay."
"Meaning?" Brian inquired, squinting his own eyes. He was never defensive, not even as a child, but matters of the heart seemed to win that war too often. Matters concerning Justin seemed to draw that out of him.
"Being gay is a lifestyle and something that requires commitment. Being into someone can be a fickle matter, a little less permanent," Lynn explained, her voice frank.
Brian eased back some, his brow wrinkling. He spread his fingers against the cool countertop, licking his lips to stifle objective words from becoming unwarranted. "This isn't about being gay or not. This is not a fling."
Lynn nodded, toying with the strap of her purse. She cleared her throat while her fingernails tapped against the marble. "Justin carries that same torch. It's endearing, really, and I'm all for his happiness. You have that aspect covered but you, like Cameron, seem to be caught in the moment rather than the grand scheme. He's about his career, his music, his passion. You have that added fixture of not only drawing him into the world of being with another man, but being a parental figure in your son's life as well."
Brian let his hand move from his neck to his chin, rubbing it thoughtfully.
She had captured every point in Brian's head, every reason he shouldn't have pursued his interest in Justin. She was that ache against his will, his conscience that knew better than to fall for the thought of being with someone who chased away his fears and understood his missteps.
"I'm not Cameron. I'm definitely not Britney," Brian declared, trying to bring his voice to a believable volume. "And Baylee and Justin's connection is on their own accord. Whether Justin plays the role of a friend, an uncle or, if he chooses, a father, I can't dictate. I'm thrilled to have someone who my son clings to so naturally like he did with his mother."
"I applaud the connection that my son must have with your son. I question whether your wife is so thrilled with it," Lynn muttered, her words leaving Brian to question whether she was patronizing him.
"Ex-wife," Brian mumbled out, looking away.
"No, you're not Cameron or Brit. Not at all. There is definitely a different chemistry; a positive one. You seem to be a little more grounded and a little more accepting of the roads Justin chooses to travel, but things can change," Lynn affirmed.
"I'm not drawing Justin into anything. Trust me, I've thought and fought with thoughts about what I should and shouldn't do with Justin. But would you be comfortable knowing that Justin had his career, his music, but lacked true passion because he didn't take a risk with love," Brian argued politely, trying to disguise the plea that was in his eyes.
Lynn smirked, scooping up her purse. She eased back from the island. "Oh, he's taken risks with love. Plenty. I can see how he feels about your son, how much he cares for you. But I don't know if its love."
Brian watched her step away, move toward the to foyer rather than the other exit toward the stairs. He furrowed his brow before replying, "he doesn't look at me as a charity case."
"Not at all, Brian. Trust me, I'm not against you and I'm not against the fact that my son is fixated on this newly found happiness. If he wants a boyfriend, is willing to take that risk, then I'm supportive," Lynn insisted, turning to face Brian again. "But are you the certain one? You're just getting out of a marriage. Are you truly taking the risk? Are you falling in love with him?"
Brian remained silent. His heart and mind wrestled with common yet dissimilar answers. He began to chew the inside of his lip while Lynn smirked and then nodded. He knew she wanted him to lash out, make some uniformed declaration that would leave him on the end of a thunderous lecture if things did not go happily. He'd have to swallow pride later and he'd have to regret admitting something to Justin's mother before he had the courage to admit it to Justin or himself. He let her wave a farewell before escaping the kitchen and he was only left with thoughts rather than words he should've said and points he could've made.
Could we have known
Never would I, helped to nail down
With nothing to gain
Here is the clincher, this should be you
Brian tilted his head up, trying to fend off his thoughts. The pale moonlight lit the room with just enough light for Brian to recognize the shadows and a few objects. He laid, unsettled, in Justin's bed with a pillow clutched to his chest and his legs drawn up. He let his legs feel the softness of the linen beneath him, his lower body clad in boxer-briefs while he wore one of Justin's smaller T-shirts. He hadn't bothered to find Justin or Baylee when Lynn left. He needed time to those thoughts he was trying to rid himself of now. He twisted his lips and shivered a little when the coolness of the night began to caress his skin.
The door didn't creak when it opened but Brian was still aware of the sound of the wind shifting in the room. He felt the hint of light from the hallway creep into his peripheral and his head turned a little to glance at the door. He smiled softly when Baylee walked in slowly, a small blanket being drug in one hand while his other scratched the top of his head. He patted to a spot next to him on the bed and waited for Baylee to crawl up on the bed before tugging his son close.
Brian sniffed at Baylee. He could still smell hints of vanilla on him. He was thrilled the scent of chlorine had long been washed away and only dabs of a cinnamon fragrance from Justin's shampoo remained. He let Baylee curl into him, his own arm hugging around Baylee's back and hoisting his son onto his chest. He could sense Baylee's sleepiness. He let his fingers drag through Baylee's blonde curls and listened to Baylee sigh.
"My tummy was hurting. I ate too much," Baylee whined quietly, snuggling to his blanket. "Justin gave me soda."
"Did he?" Brian questioned lowly, tucking his chin to glance down at his son. Baylee's eyes were barely open but there was just enough light in the room for Brian to gaze into their blueness and smile.
"I missed Justin today," Baylee yawned out, head drooping like his eyes. He breathed into his father's chest and let his eyes settle shut.
"I did too cricket," Brian replied, grinning when he heard the soft lull of his son's breathing. He rubbed Baylee's back and glanced to the door, the sudden increase of shadows cascading in the room alerting him to another's presence. He spotted Justin lingering in the doorway for a moment before entering, the dim light capturing the curves of muscles and contours of skin as Justin strolled in wearing just a pair of pink and green stripped boxers.
Justin stood at the edge of the bed, looking down at Brian with a lowered brow and his bottom lip between his teeth. He scratched the side of his head, nose twitching with eyes that spoke volumes but nothing escaping his lips. His hand slithered down his stomach, scratching at the side before fingers trailed over wisps of hair that led from his navel to beneath his boxers. Justin stretched and yawned quietly, still taking in the sight of Brian with lidded eyes.
"I gave him Ginger Ale for his stomachache. Mom used to always give me that as a child," Justin commented quietly, watching the way Baylee snuggled closer to Brian, still sleeping peacefully. He smiled at Baylee. "I had to steal it from Trace's personal collection, but it definitely calmed him down."
Brian nodded, finding it impossible to hide his smile toward Justin. He wrapped an arm around Baylee and scooted back on the bed a little, offering space for Justin to join them. He spotted the hesitance in Justin's face, questioned its origin, but exhaled softly when Justin finally crawled onto the bed and shifted until he was close to them.
"He had fun at Joey's house today, I heard," Justin commented, slinking a leg between Brian's. He let Brian tangle his legs around his before lifting a hand to push back Brian's bangs.
"Yeah," Brian concurred, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. He melted into the caress of Justin's hand in his hair, eyes closing briefly. Something about the way the tips of Justin's fingers running lightly against Brian's scalp left him seeking that state of bliss he wanted earlier.
"Did you have fun?" Justin questioned, his hand slipping to the back of Brian's head, just holding it.
Brian snickered, turning his head in Justin's direction. He admired him freely, watching the way Justin studying him with eyes that were one-part friendly, two-parts serious. He watched the way Justin's chest rose and fell, the way he was propped up on one arm to watch Brian and Baylee. He unfurled his arm from Baylee and lifted his hand to trace over the hairs that lined Justin's cheeks.
"It was very educational. Chris stopped by and we sat around having important life discussions," Brian replied with a grin, his index finger tracing over Justin's bottom lip.
"About what?" Justin inquired, his brow lowering.
Brian shook his head, swallowing a giggle as he thumbed Justin's chin. There were spots of concern hidden beneath Justin's curiosity. He was sure his statement alone was going to elicit a phone call to both Chris and Joey tomorrow from Justin. "Nothing bad Ju. Just a few things that made me think, but nothing you should worry about."
"You do know that your words aren't comforting me right now," Justin retorted, tilting his head. He rolled his eyes when Brian laughed again but welcome the way Brian's hand tipped his chin upward and he didn't resist smiling when Brian offered him a Jim Carrey-like smirk.
"You mom was... interesting," Brian shifting the position Baylee laid on him when Justin scooted closer. He was comforted by Justin's hand resting on his hip, a light squeeze drawing his attention to Justin's face and the offbeat look Justin gave him.
"She called me the second she got out of the house," Justin replied, smirking when Brian's eyes went wide. "I think she's testing you, but from what I can tell, she's rather high on you. Of course she's not pro-Justin-gets-in-a-relationship-with-a-guy, but she's waning. She's looking forward to seeing us around each other and meeting Baylee."
Brian took it all in. He wanted to fiddle with it, compare his experience to what Justin might've heard. He wanted to ask questions, seek out advice.
He wanted to call his own mother, but she was still yet unaware of what was truly transpiring between Brian and Justin though he was sure Baylee was dropping one too many hits anytime he visited with his grandparents. He knew Nick would have some form of negativity to rant to Brian about and he didn't want to overlook the momentum he was almost certain he was gaining with Justin in his life. He knew he had thought too hard when Justin laid his head down, heavy eyes looking at him with concern while red lips pouted.
Brian was quick to slide Baylee between Justin and himself before leaning up and over Baylee to press a kiss to Justin's lips. He lingered there, watching the way Justin's eyes shot back open and he stared at Brian with confusion. Brian smiled softly, edging forward to mouth another kiss against Justin's lips. He gasped quietly when Justin returned the kiss. He let his lips fumble with Justin's as he tried to maintain his balance, giggling against Justin's lips when Justin faltered.
"If she was trying, I don't think she could've gotten me to break up with you or leave you alone," Brian whispered, pulling back and lying down again.
He blindly searched for Justin's hand and found it, interlocking their fingers.
Justin laughed lowly, satisfied when he saw the dimples in Brian's cheeks. He released a quiet sigh before snickering, "I don't think she was trying. But maybe it should've been me taking the brunt of that conversation rather than you."
Brian nodded. It was trapping. He felt enclosed by his own thoughts, elevated into a smaller space by the words and challenges of Justin's mother. He was still left to contemplate her final question. He was buried beneath the suggestions from Chris and Joey while mingling with his own thoughts on what to pursue and what to leave alone when it came to Justin.
"I still owe you for this morning," Brian whispered, his free hand skating over the skin of Justin's stomach. He was tempted, encouraged by the way Justin winked at him. He wanted to let his hand slip, drag down the front of Justin's boxers. Part of him wished that Baylee had slept in the guesthouse with Trace, permitted him to seek out the refuge of hot kisses, rolling on top of the covers and dragging his heel against Justin's back when Justin entered him.
"Don't worry, I'm sure I'll feel an urge around three o'clock in the morning," Justin snorted, raising his brow. He sucked in his bottom lip and permitted Brian to play with the top of his boxers, praying his hand didn't drift and cause him to drag Brian out of the bed and leave Baylee sleeping by himself.
Baylee yawned and stretched, rolling unconsciously before snuggling to Justin, drawing a smile from both Brian and Justin. Justin happily drew the small boy closer, letting Baylee press his face into Justin's bare chest. Justin held onto Brian's hand while ducking his head to admire Baylee. Something about those rosy cheeks, small nose, and red lips was reminiscent of Brian on another level.
"We're not as bad as the Bunkers but definitely more normal than the Cleavers," Brian remarked, and his voice was enough for Justin to raise his head at glance at Brian with an arched eyebrow. "Not quite the Cosby's but we're definitely a family."
Justin smiled and nodded. He knew Brian was holding his breath after he spoke. There was a tinge of fear in his eyes when he spoke and Justin sensed it, wanted it to run away quicker than it appeared. He wanted Brian to say it, admit to it. He wished Brian had said it earlier when he questioned him. He didn't mind the thought, the idea. He raised their hands and kissed the back of Brian's, still smiling and relived when Brian joined him.
"That wasn't so hard," Justin muttered before yawning. He batted his drowsy eyes before gazing at Brian again.
"A little scary," Brian whispered back, twisting his mouth.
"Glad you said it," Justin noted, eyes drifting shut. He grinned when he felt a kiss touch his lips again.
"Me too," Brian said against Justin's ear. He slipped down into his former spot and snuggled closer until Baylee was wedged comfortably between the two, eyes shutting to relinquish his body to the ever-growing exhaustion. He sighed softly and drained his mind of suffocating thoughts. He only thought of Justin and Baylee and it was enough to escort him to sleep and to further thoughts of what the morning would bring.
This happened to be never changing
Holding inside
The phobia view, made cold and crippled
Ending it all
-- "The Clincher" by Chevelle
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