Boy Traumatized By James
Disclaimer
This is a story which deals with sexual as well as romantic situations between consenting teenaged males. This story will also deal with sexual assault, child abuse, Anti-LGBT Bigotry, Racism, Suicide, Ableism, Discrimination and other possibly sensitive topics. If you're unable to handle reading about such sensitive subjects, then back out of the story now. Also, if you're not of the legal age to read this type of story, then please find something else to read. Other than this, no additional Trigger Warnings will be given. Also, "Flame E-mails" will be ignored.
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Finally, if you like this story and haven't done this already. Take my e-mail address jamesheady1985@gmail.com to what you say is going to be a Brainstorm concert. However when you get there and get seated, let them know that you took them to a Yoko Ono concert instead then leave with the car.
Thanks once again to K. for editing. Your editing and assistance really help with making this story what it is. Thanks as always.
Boy Traumatized
Chapter Seven
"I think that if I ever have kids, and they are upset, I won't tell them that people are starving in China or anything like that because it wouldn't change the fact that they were upset. And even if somebody else has it much worse, that doesn't really change the fact that you have what you have." Stephen Chbosky The Perks of Being a Wallflower
Omri
Over the rest of that weekend, Chase and I hung out. We went out to eat that Sunday, then out to the lake to swim for a bit. It was perfect weather for it. There was a lot of sun that day, and the sky was without a cloud in it. It was a deep-blue that I really loved each time I beheld it!
We ended that day watching a couple of shows. We watched a couple of episodes of the X Files which Chase had introduced me to shortly after I came to live with him. We watched the episode about the mass panic due to cockroaches and then the episode about the three mutant brothers who were killing people in an effort to keep their town safe.
It was a really nice day, and the evening with Chase and I spending time in the living room watching TV truly was a nice finish to the day.
0000
Tanner
I sat outside at the picknick table in back of our house with Megan and Trish sitting across from me. They dropped by shortly after my mom, dad and I finished eating dinner. We offered them left-overs, but they both said they had already eaten. They said that they wanted to hang out for a bit, and I was glad to see them! After they visited with my parents for a few minutes, I got drinks that we all three took outside. Once seated at the picknick table, I opened my bottle of Coke as they both took a drink from theirs.
We talked about how our weekend had been going, and Trish was saying that she and her dad were getting things cleaned up around the house. She also said that she had just been doing some reading, as well as listening to music most of the weekend.
Megan said that she was just working on some art stuff that she was trying to finish. She was really good at painting, drawing and carving. I was excited to see what she had finished once it was ready for us all to see.
I told them that I had just been hanging around the house, and I had planned to hang out with this girl named Cassey that I had been seeing for a couple of months. We met a couple of months ago back in the Summer when she was at one of the restaurants with her parents. She and I seemed to hit it off really well, and by July we went all the way. More on that later though. We had been together ever since, and I hoped to see her that weekend, but she had plans with her family.
"We'll have to hang out with Omri and Deon at some point this week," Trish suggested. "I really like spending time with them, and they're both really nice."
"I really like being around them as well," Megan responded. "I like watching them give each other shit and joke around the way they do."
"I like that as well," I answered. "I like seeing them together as well. They really seem to be getting to be really good friends."
"Yeah. I don't know about Omri, but you can totally see that Deon's practically in love with him," Trish said.
"I figured that Deon might have a thing for guys, or just a thing for Omri," I replied. "It's kind of hard to tell how Omri feels though. It seems like he wants something to happen, but I sense that he has walls up a little still."
"I've gotten that vibe as well," Megan added. "I've watched Omri sometimes, especially when he's by himself when we've been in the various class rooms together. These were times when Deon wasn't there. During those times, Omri seems to get this way about him where he seems kind of lost or something."
"I've noticed it as well," Trish replied.
"So have I," I answered. "It's like, with Omri, that he went through something really bad. Also, did you notice the scars on his wrists?"
"I did," Trish answered.
"Me too," Megan replied.
"I think that we're all in agreement that we're all rather protective of him," I said.
The two girls agreed, and we ended that particular line of conversation with the promise that we would continue looking out for him, and being there for both him and Deon.
After Megan and Trish left, I helped with a couple of last-minute details of kitchen clean-up. Once that was done, my parents settled down in the living room to watch TV. I went back to my room to call Cassy, and I waited for her to pick up once I had dialed her number.
After her dad answered the phone, I waited while he went to look for her. As I sat there, I thought over our time together. I sighed to myself, and not in a content or happy way. Cassy was the second girl with whom I had been sexual. The first time I had sex was the year before with a girl who was in most of my classes.
We decided to just be Friends With Benefits. It was mainly a lot of making out in either her room or mine, and then a couple of times she would give me a hand job, but refused to do oral. I asked her that on the first time shortly after we decided to be sexual. After she said she didn't want to do oral, I agreed immediately, and never brought up the subject for the rest of the time we were together.
Finally, about two months after we started doing sexual stuff, we went all the way for the first time. It had been her second time, and my first time. I fortunately had the sense to have a condom with me, and so we did it in my room one Friday night when her parents worked late, and my parents were out for several hours with friends.
It felt good being inside her sure enough, but I was surprised to find that I had the feeling of not knowing what the big deal was. I made all the typical physical movements, and when I came, a second afterwards, I had the immediate thought of this is it? I had been disappointed to find that it wasn't the huge emotional explosion that I heard that it would be. I even thought over the other times that she and I had been together sexually and I was finding those times to be increasingly difficult to get through.
I didn't know why I was feeling this way, and I was questioning whether or not I was pushing myself too hard to enjoy sex according to society's expectations of what sex should be. I figured that that was it, and so I would try to relax a little more while being with her. She would end up moving away about a month later after we had gone all the way for the first time, and so that ended our time together.
Being with Cassy was good, and I was enjoying the making out we had been doing, as well as the hand jobs she would give me. She did do oral, but told me that she couldn't allow me to come in her mouth. I agreed, and when I was close, I would warn her. She would pull off, and I'd make sure that my load didn't get on her.
Though I enjoyed our time together, I still had that feeling in the back of my mind about how it felt like something was missing. Even when we went all the way in July, I had that feeling of being incomplete. That feeling had been stronger at that point, and I was glad that Cassy hadn't noticed. She just said that it had been really good for it being her first time ever. I was glad at least to hear that.
Even now in the last few times of she and I hanging out, whether it be sexually or non-sexually, I felt increasingly empty. I wasn't sure how to tell her about what I was feeling, and I was noticing how she could get really impatient really easily. This happened about a couple of weeks into our relationship, and I tried as best as I could to not react in the same way back to her. She would act impatient in front of her parents as well when being with me. I would watch to see what they would do, and they'd just smile and say that she was always used to getting what she wants.
We were starting to argue more and more over the last few weeks as well, and I wondered how things would turn out with us going forward,.
I was yanked from my thoughts when Cassy got on the line, and we started talking. She asked when I was going to see her sometime that week, and we agreed on the next day after school,. We didn't talk for too long though, since she had to get back to doing whatever it was she had been doing with her family. I hung up after she disconnected then put the phone down on my desk. I thought over our relationship again, and sighed as I went over to the bed to lay down for a few minutes before going to get my shower. I wanted to just not think, and I wanted to just rest my mind for a little while.
0000
Omri
During that up-coming week at school, Deon and I continued hanging out. We also included Megan, Trish and Tanner while hanging out together and we all had a lot of fun. Then Wednesday evening Deon and I hung out, just the two of us at his house. I got there around a little after 6:30 P.M. His parents were out with friends, and so we had about two hours with each other. Chase would be picking me up by 9:00 P.M. that night.
After Deon's parents left, we went outside in the back yard to talk for a bit. We hadn't seen each other, save for our classes that day. Deon stayed back during lunch to have some extra instruction from the teacher, so he ate at the school that day. We also had little time to talk during school since our classes had definitely picked up that day. Now we were together, and it was nice to have some uninterrupted time together!
"It's a really nice night out," I said turning to Deon.
He was sitting beside me on the porch swing that was in back of the house beside the back door. The woods stretched for what seemed like forever, and the sun was setting at that moment. It was beginning to turn twilight at this point, and it was truly peaceful out at that moment.
"I agree," he said scooting close to me, and placing his hand over mine.
I turned my hand so that we were now practically holding hands. He gently closed his hand around mine, and I did the same as best as I could with his hand being much bigger than mine.
He looked at me for a long moment, and my eyes met his once more. I knew in that moment that I had fallen in love with Deon Christianson! I hadn't planned on it. I'm sure that most people would think that none of us ever plan who we fall in love, but I truly didn't have any plans on even allowing myself to hope for a future with Deon!
I worried if I would ever be good enough for him. I also worried about how he would react when he found out about the rape I had been through last year. I was afraid that he would consider me damaged goods, or just a slut who was asking for it anyway. I couldn't stand to have him think of me like that.
No, I definitely had no plans to fall in love, or even think it possible, much less plan a future for Deon and I. Yet, here I was sitting beside him, and realizing in my head what I probably known deep down since the first time he and I met. I loved Deon, and not only loved him, but was more in love with him than I could ever communicate in mere words!
"It's nice to finally be here with you without any interruptions!" I said, scooting close enough so that our thighs were pressed together.
By this point Deon had moved our clasped hands to rest on top of his thigh so they wouldn't get squeezed between our pressed together bodies.
"I had really wanted to have some time alone with you all day today!" he said, taking his hand from mine and wrapping his arm around my shoulders, pulling me closer to him so that my upper body was now resting against his. "It seemed like we wouldn't ever get any time alone to just talk and relax."
"Yeah, I agree," I replied. "We'll definitely be able to have more uninterrupted time together this up-coming weekend when we stay over at my house together!"
"I'm truly looking forward to that!" Deon responded.
"Me too," I answered.
There was a silence for a few minutes as I rested my head on my best friend's shoulder as he stroked my hair gently. That always relaxed me, and this time was no exception! Finally, I lifted my head and looked deeply into his eyes. I couldn't hold back the question any longer!
"Deon?" I said working hard to not lose my nerve.
"Yeah?" he said looking just as deeply into my eyes.
"I wanted to ask you something, and I don't want to upset or piss you off," I said.
"What?" he asked.
"Well, you know how you're always joking around about guys you like, or sexual stuff you're always joking about wanting to do with other guys?"
"Yeah," he replied. "I hope I haven't been bothering you when joking around like that. I wouldn't ever want to offend you."
"No, you haven't offended me," I said. "That's not where I'm going with this."
"Okay," he answered.
"I was just curious since you'd make jokes like that," I went on. "I was wondering are you gay? Maybe even Bi? I don't mean to just assume just because of the jokes you were making, butбн."
I wasn't sure how to continue, and Deon gently pressed a finger to my lips as he smiled warmly at me.
"I understand what you're saying," he replied. "I appreciate you not just assuming, and that really means a lot. Yeah, I'm gay. I figured it out when I was 12. I'm really lucky in that my parents have been supportive since I came out to them shortly after I realized who I am. That really means a lot to have their love and support."
"I can imagine it does," I responded. "Thanks for being honest with me. That means a lot."
"You're welcome," he answered. "I wouldn't be any other way with you."
"Same here," I said. "To be completely honest with you, I'm also gay."
I didn't even think about it as I began telling him about when I realized I was gay. Before I knew it, I was telling him the whole story. I left nothing out, and by the time I got to the rape, I was held tightly in his arms as I shook and struggled through that part of the story. He held me as I sobbed. Having him there made it some what bearable. which was probably why I was able to finish the story. I told him the rest that included when I left and came here to Sangger to meet my brother. I even told him about how about a month into me living with Chase I got drunk one night, and had I not been found by Chase and the police I would have died in the alley. I was sitting and started to aspirate my own vomit when they found me. Luckily they turned me over in time. More on that little adventure later though.
My tears were gone by this time as I rested in Deon's arms. He was quiet for a long time, and I wondered about what he was thinking. Then he lifted my head and looked deeply into my eyes, and he pressed his lips to the corner of my mouth, giving me a long and warm kiss.
I hadn't expected it, and it was amazing for being my first kiss from another boy! We continued looking into one another's eyes, then he spoke.
"I truly hate all of those people who failed you!" he said as he had the emotions of his clear love for me, and his deep burning rage for those who had hurt me. The emotions warring inside him could be seen on his face and in his eyes. "You deserved a fuck of a lot better than what those piece of shit parents of yours gave you, as well as those walking and talking cesspools called friends! I can promise you that as long as I'm here, I won't let anyone hurt you ever again, especially not like that!"
He held me tightly, and I hugged him back just as tight. We stayed like that for a long while, then he loosened his grip, and I looked up at him.
"That really means the world to me that you're my protector," I said. "I truly do feel safe around you, and I want to be here for you as well."
"That truly means a lot," he answered. "I feel really safe around you too Omri. I'm glad to have you looking out for me as well. That really means a lot also!"
"I'm glad to hear you say that," I answered.
"I'm really glad that you and I have found the parents we have," Deon said. "Well, you have your brother, but he's doing a lot for you that most parents do. My parents have been really amazing, and I'm glad to have them with me. I love how I can come to them, and whether it's something I say that they agree or disagree with, I at least know that they'll truly listen to what I'm saying. They don't just dismiss it as me being a dramatic overly-emotional kid."
"I'm glad that my brother treats me basically the same," I responded. "He listens when I'm talking about something good, as well as if I'm talking about something bad I'm dealing with. That truly means a lot that he's as supportive of me as he is. If I ever have kids, I want to be that kind of parent to them. One who listens rather than dismissing their concerns as being unimportant, or the screaming and crying of a stupid child."
"Yeah, I agree," Deon said. "I want to be there for my kids someday if I were ever to have any. I would want to treat them as lovingly as my own parents have treated me since living with them these last few years."
"I'm glad we're both in agreement on that," I said.
I rested my head against Deon's chest once more, and he just held me as we sat there listening to the crickets chirping loudly as twilight was slowly giving way to nightfall.
We talked a little more until around 9:00 P.M. when Chase came to pick me up. Deon and I said goodbye to each other, and once back home I showered then got into bed after saying goodnight to Chase. It had been a truly wonderful evening for Deon and I!
It was now Friday, and Deon was going to be sleeping over with me for that night as well as for Saturday night! I could hardly contain my excitement as Deon and I came into my house after school that Friday afternoon. It was bright and sunny out, and we were talking about what we wanted to do for the rest of that afternoon. We decided to go swimming at a small pond that was way back in the woods in back of my house.
We let Chase know where we would be, and once we had our swim shorts, towels and sun tan lotion we headed out. We reached the area in what seemed like no time, and once there, I helped Deon off with his shirt, shoes, socks and shorts.
Seeing him with most of his clothes removed was truly a beautiful as well as deeply arousing sight! I loved his smooth creamy skin, as well as the hint of a six-pack beginning to form under his abdomen! I also loved how I could see the outline of his cock through his boxers as it appeared to hang nicely over what I guessed was a large set of balls that I knew just had to be filled with hot cum that I was increasingly anxious to taste someday, hopefully very soon!
Deon watched as I undressed, and I loved how comfortable we both clearly were with being almost totally naked in front of each other like this! He took in the sight of my body, and I could see just how hungry he was for my body! I wanted him to enjoy my body sometime soon as well, and I truly hoped that he liked it when that day finally came!
Author's Notes
You guys have begun to read about Omri and Deon's weekend that's starting off in this chapter. I'm sure that you guys didn't really expect the other scenes I included featuring Trish, Megan and Tanner. Also, I'm sure you're all wondering what's going on with Tanner where he and Cassy are concerned. You'll all find out soon. As for Deon and Omri, you'll be reading more about their weekend in the next chapter, and they'll definitely be getting a lot closer at that point.
Having said all that, I hope all of you are doing well. All of you have a good evening, and I'll see you guys in Chapter Eight.