Blue Sky

BLUE SKY - PART THREE chapters 21 & 22 by reid

-21-

When I finally woke up again, it was dark out and I could hear the people in the apartment next door. They sounded like a young, married couple. Or not. I really couldn't tell just by their voices. I rolled over on my side and looked out the window, seeing the clear sky and the different constellations. Different than the ones I could see back in LA.

The front door closing was what woke me up. I laid in the bed as Teddy dropped his bag on the floor in the living room and walked into the bedroom. His hair was spiked with perspiration and the white T-shirt he was wearing had several streaking grass stains on the front and back. I smiled and watched as he sat down on the bed and took his shoes off. He smelled musky with sweat and his cheeks were still a little flushed.

"Good day?" I asked with a yawn.

He smiled, pulling off his shirt and crawling up on the bed. I got a warm shiver as he pulled back the sheets and snuggled up to me under the blanket. His warm skin felt so good at that moment. It felt familiar. He kissed me on the cheek and hugged me tightly, sending another warm shiver up my spine.

"So it was a good day." I said with a laugh.

"Oh yeah. Some of the kids there acted like it was Christmas."

I smiled and hugged him back. I knew that it wouldn't take him long at all to start working his magic here. For just a second, a pang of jealousy hit me as I wondered how many little girls had fallen in love with him. Probably quite a few. But when I hugged him, his shoulders felt tense, almost. Residually tense.

"What else happened?" I asked, rubbing his shoulders.

Teddy sighed and stared at the ceiling, "Once I worked with the kids, it was fine. But I had to talk to some of the parents and some of the people that work at the school. It was just a little awkward."

"Uh oh," I grimaced, knowing what he meant, "Did that go okay?"

"Yeah. They just treated it like this big interrogation thing. First, they were disappointed that I didn't dress more formally which contained some backhanded remark about my Filipino-ness. Then they asked about my 'personal life,' and then, finally, they made it clear that they 'understood' if I couldn't 'help' the kids."

I stroked his bare arm, "But everything is cool, right?"

Teddy smiled again, his shoulders untensing quickly, "Yeah. Once I started working with the kids and when their parents saw me do it, I suddenly got a whole lot more welcome."

"Well, that's only appropriate," I said as I kissed his forehead, "They're only going to be able to actually communicate with their children now. They owe you at least the courtesy of a polite nod on occasion. Even if you are half-Filipino."

Teddy hugged me again and nuzzled my neck, the both of us laying there contentedly. I gently traced my fingers over Teddy's back, feeling the hard muscle of his trapezius. Under the blankets, he stroked my foot with his toes. Even then, it still seemed weird to me: I was living in Japan. The Japan.

"So, how did you do?" Teddy asked, sitting up on the bed and stretching his arms.

I yawned, "Watched some TV, got some sleep. Nothing too major."

Teddy nodded and stumbled out of bed, going to one of the large plastic bags he'd brought in and rooting around inside. I watched him, fascinated by what a gopher he could be when it came to finding things. I threw the covers back and stood up, stretching my back. At that moment, I felt like I could have fought the world and won.

"Check out what I got." Teddy said, pulling a small black leather box.

He tossed it to me and I caught it, turning it over in my hands. Whatever it was, it looked expensive. I opened the lid, nearly gawking at the expensive sports watch inside. In my life, I'd seen quite a few high-priced timepieces, but none as good as the one I saw right then. It looked like a Rolex - except better.

"You want it?" Teddy asked.

"Uh - yeah, sure," I stammered, "Why don't you want it?"

He shrugged, "It's more your style. Prestige is everything, after all."

I smiled, "Thanks."

It was all I could think of to say. That damn watch was probably worth more than my life. I walked over and kissed Teddy before taking the watch out of the box and strapping it to my wrist. I stood there like a goober, admiring it for several seconds. I had to admit, it did look pretty good. Even on me. That was just how kick-ass of a watch it was.

Teddy stood next to me and held my free hand, swinging it back and forth between us.

"So - are you hungry?"

I shrugged, still enamoured with the watch.

"They gave me food," He said, "A couple of the parents want to take us to dinner sometime."

"Oh God," I laughed, "You're already networking!"

Teddy followed me as we walked into the living room.

"You have no idea."

I sat on the couch and Teddy joined me.

"Is this going to be like back in LA?"

"Yeah," He nodded, propping his legs up on the coffee table and crossing them, "Except this time, it's going to be much more extravagant and material."

"Ah, that's right. They can afford it here."

"It's an expensive school."

"It should be," I said, fascinated by the time zone feature of the watch, "With that they're paying you for how long you're working, they'd have to charge pretty high," I forced my attention from the watch, "Are you tired?"

"Not really. It's more like a weird, buzzed, post-anesthetic feeling."

"Well, it's nine o'clock. It'll be at least three or four hours until I'm going to be ready to sleep again."

Teddy smiled and rested his head on my shoulder, "They gave me four boxed dinners so whenever you're hungry."

I draped my arm around him and we sat there, looking out the window.

"Maybe in a little while."

Teddy nestled himself against me before he spoke.

"We do have six months."

After we went to bed again that first night, I didn't remember much about the several days that followed. At some point, I knew I'd gotten sick and it was the bad sick. The kind that you couldn't just say 'I'm okay' and get away with. All I remembered about it was the hot, clammy feeling and the raw texture of my windpipe.

I drifted in and out of consciousness for the next several days, only getting up to use the bathroom. Along the way, there had been some dim concern that Teddy had better stop hovering or he'd lose his job. But then my head would feel about twenty pounds heavier and I'd fall back into bed. Then there was the seemingly unlimited time my face spent buried in a bucket of some kind.

A few days - or weeks, I couldn't tell - passed before I could actually sit up in bed and think clearly. It felt like all those wonderful drinking benders where, after a point, the liquor works it's way out of your bloodstream and you can think clearly. My head felt heavy and I was disoriented, wobbling a bit before sitting on the edge of the bed.

I squinted in the darkness. It was night time. I could see the street lights filtering through the venetian blinds. Taking a slow but steady step, I lifted my weight from the bed and felt my way across the floor with my feet. Sweat rolled down my forehead and my cheeks, trailing down my neck in cool lines.

My stomach churned painfully with the effort of walking. I stopped and leaned against the wall, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath. When I felt like I could move again, I curled my fingers around the doorknob and opened it slowly. Not sure if I was going to find a virus control tent, I looked out into the room.

The TV was on as I limped over to the couch. The last thing I wanted to do was jostle my stomach too much. I still felt like I was trying to move through some weird dream world. I saw Teddy laying on the couch, dozed off in front of the TV.

Gently, I cleared my throat and nudged the back of the sofa. Just that small movement made Teddy sit bolt up right with a frantic jerk. He looked at me, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. His hair was spiked like it always was when he'd been sleeping. I somehow found the strength in my system to smile.

"Are you okay?!" He asked, his tone worried.

I nodded and leaned against the sofa, "What happened?"

He smirked a bit, "You got a viral infection. On the plane probably."

"How long was I out?"

"Two days."

I could only nod weakly as I lowered myself into one of the chairs. The cool white leather felt good to my clammy body. The relief of not having contracted some hideous disease helped me out quite a bit.

"Am I gonna live?"

"Yeah. The doctor said it's happened a lot recently."

"Did you get it?"

"No. The Benadryl I took on the plane probably saved me from it."

I opened my eyes, concerned, "What about work?"

He smiled and leaned down, playing with my hair, "I tried to stay with you but you insisted that I go."

"I did?"

He chuckled, "You don't remember?"

I shook my head, feeling a little too weak for verbal communication.

"I only had to work today and that was just an introduction thing," Teddy gently scratched my scalp, "So you didn't get me fired. Not yet, at least."

Teddy paused for a few seconds, still stroking my head. Even in my dehydrated state, I knew that he wanted to say something. Something that would require effort on my part. My stomach churned at the thought of having to do much more than lay around like a wet dish rag. I swallowed and shifted in the chair, my head dizzy.

"So what is it?" I asked, my tongue felt like it was coated with mattress stuffing.

Teddy sighed, "My boss invited us to dinner this weekend."

I opened my eyes, "This weekend? The one in two days?"

"Yeah."

"And I'm expected to attend?"

"That's the idea."

Slowly, I stood up and wobbled a little. Ever-attentive, Teddy draped my arm over his shoulder and helped me back into the bedroom. I took it slower than I needed to, wanting a few extra seconds to think of a way to get myself out of this horrible dinner idea. Even when I wasn't sick, the idea of having to impress the employer of my "special friend" didn't agree with me.

Teddy helped me sit down on the bed and when I laid down, he draped the cool top sheet over me. I rested on the pillow for a few more seconds, hoping he wouldn't notice that I was blatantly stalling. He did notice, of course. I felt like a hiker playing dead in the presence of a seven foot tall grizzly bear.

"Wow, you're not stalling at all, Shawn."

I groaned and rolled over, looking at the nightstand. Even in the dim light of the bedroom, I could see the watch on the polished hickory. I felt a bitter laugh rising in my throat as I leaned up on my elbow. Prestige actually was everything.

"So is that why you got me the watch?"

Teddy looked down, immediately giving himself away. I laid back down on the pillow and closed my eyes. I had two choices in the situation: refuse to go and be a dick or go and possibly vomit all over Teddy's boss. Neither choice held too much appeal for me.

"So I'm the trophy partner, huh?" I asked, my voice hoarse.

"Shawn - certain things need to be done here."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"It means that while I may be excellent with kids and jaw-droppingly patient with their parents, I'm also a half-breed. A gay half-breed by the standards here."

"Well, I guess you shouldn't have taken the job."

By the silence that followed, I knew I'd given him a fairly low blow. My stomach felt a brief pang of guilt but it went away quick. With a sigh, Teddy laid back on the bed and stared at the ceiling. For another brief second, I considered apologizing.

I sat up, "If you'd told me, I would have been fine with it."

He looked at me, "No, you wouldn't have."

"No, I wouldn't have but you still should have told me."

We sat for a few seconds in silence. I wasn't feeling so great about regaining my right mind. There wasn't any way to get out of it without costing Teddy a pretty good amount of esteem with his job. I'd never been with anyone whom was involved with such a political career and that little taste of it helped me realize why.

Stiffly, I rolled over in bed and coughed. I could only pray that in two days, I could get myself well enough to make a good impression. The last thing I wanted to do was projectile vomit all over the table. Knowing my luck, they would attribute it to Teddy being half-Filipino and having "uncivilized blood."

"How long of a 'dinner' are we going to be attending?"

"Two hours, maybe," Teddy shrugged, "It's going to be at a really high-end steakhouse so it won't be just sushi or aged crab or--"

I interrupted, my stomach not liking the food talk.

"Okay - fine," I groaned, sitting up again, "Just make sure I don't get tarred for only drinking water and eating crackers."

Teddy smiled. He stood up and kissed me gently on the cheek. I could tell that he was grateful. He ruffled my hair gently. The gentleness of his touch sent a shiver up my spine. Goosebumps stood up on my skin in the humid heat of the evening. I realized that, at least, I'd pretty much gotten over the jet lag. Small victories keep you going.

With Teddy's help I stood up and blinked. The only thing I wanted at that point was a shower - and another shower after that. As I lurched my way into the bathroom, I tried not to think about sushi or any other solid food. I knew that the next two days would be all about steeling myself.

Welcome to Japan, Shawn, I thought with an acrid taste.

-22-

I spent the next two days recovering. Very slowly recovering, but recovering nonetheless. I worked my way up from clear liquids to carbonated clear liquids on the first day. Nearly yelling at Teddy that I'd be okay while he was at work was enough of an energy drain. Even that simple task was enough to put me on the couch for a few hours.

In between heavy doses of CNN's taped loop of English language programming, I'd also begun to unpack our things. Teddy's drawings had survived the trip, as had his raggedy wardrobe. My pajama pants were alright and my mp3 player, the only item I truly cared about, had done all right as well.

Moving the stacks of our clothes provided good fitness. By the end of the second day, I was actually feeling like I might survive Japan. I still hadn't had the stomach-power to take on anything more solid than yogurt, but I knew I could fake it. I'd just have water and soup at the restaurant. It was just my luck to get sick when I had an opportunity to overeat at a nice place.

Teddy came home from work that Saturday with grass stains all over his shirt. All over his ass, too, and a scrape on his elbow. Yet he felt like he'd won the lottery. I couldn't understand how someone could take so much pleasure from an organized occupation. When he walked through the door smelling like sweat, armpit, and grass, it made me happy. It was why we'd come to this place, after all.

I'd been staring at a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for nearly forty minutes. I was trying to work up the strength to eat it when Teddy had stumbled in. He dropped his gym bag with a thud and kissed me on the cheek from behind. I knew he'd had a good day when he started to nuzzle my neck gently. Had it not been for my sketchy nervous system, I would have braved his musk for the sex - but it wasn't happening.

"Good day?" I asked, trying to somehow psyche out the sandwich.

"Oh yeah," Teddy said, stripping off his sweat-stained T-shirt and heading for the bathroom, "The parents said they feel like they can talk to their kids now."

I stood up and walked into the bathroom. Teddy had started the shower and was washing himself as I hoisted myself onto the counter. Through the frosted glass of the shower, I could see his glistening body. I reminded myself that as soon as I was well, we would definitely be having a lot of sex.

"So they're coming around?" I asked, raising my voice above the water.

"Definitely. This one woman almost cried."

I smiled to myself in the steam filled room. I wished I could have had that sort of effect on people. As much as I liked being able to do six beer bongs without puking, the satisfaction of helping people had to feel much better. I could hear the pride in Teddy's voice. Not bragging, but definitely proud.

The water shut off and Teddy stepped out. Hoping to keep from draining much needed plasma from my brain, I averted my eyes. After he'd wrapped himself in a towel, I followed him out into the living room. Listening as he changed in the bedroom, I stood at the window and looked out at the street.

Out on the sidewalk, an old woman was carrying a bag of groceries. Further down the street, two young girls were walking together. I smiled, knowing that sort of behavior wouldn't fly too high in Los Angeles. Most places there, you couldn't go out on your front porch without catching two drive-by bullets and a porn flyer shoved into your hand.

My people-watching was broken up as Teddy walked out of the bedroom. I felt a thud in my chest as I looked at him. As appealing as the ratty clothes could be, he certainly did dress up quite nicely. I felt another tingling below the belt as I admired him. Just as quickly, he noticed my noticing.

"Shut up!" He groaned, throwing his towel at me.

I shook my head and swallowed hard, trying to compose myself enough to take a shower of my own. I grabbed the clothes I'd set aside earlier and braved the steamy depths of the bathroom. Once my mind was off Teddy, my stomach churned painfully. Rubbing myself, I started the shower and undressed.

As the hot water flowed over me, I closed my eyes and prayed. Again. The last thing I could have afforded to do was vomit all over Teddy's boss. Even as I washed myself, my stomach still rumbled ominously. I sighed with resignation, not wanting to expect the worst - but not unconditioned to deal with it.

Shockingly enough, not even twenty minutes in the shower and fresh, clean, nice clothes could get rid of the nausea. I rubbed my stomach restlessly, inhaling the humid air of the neighborhood. I leaned against the wall of the alcove, watching with trepidation as an impossibly swank car pulled up by the curb.

The man who got out was much more cosmopolitan than I'd expected, wearing the same sort of 'dressy casual' threads as I'd seen from the apartment window. He was followed by a beautiful, young woman who didn't look any older than 19 or 20. He and Teddy shook hands respectfully, which I assumed was the equivalent of a bear hug in Japan.

In the native tongue, Teddy introduced me to Mori-san. I immediately blanked on what to do when meeting some new. He extended his hand - and I bowed. Then when I extended my hand - he bowed. For the hundredth time that day, my stomach cramped as a beat passed before he and I shook hands successfully. Mori introduced us to Miyama - his girlfriend.

I could only stand there looking respectful as he and Teddy conversed in Japanese. Miyama looked at me in a way I couldn't quite get a read on. It wasn't distaste but it wasn't exactly disinterest either. She smiled at me and I expected her lips to curl in an evil grin. I cleared my throat and swallowed at the acidic discomfort that was trying to rise from my stomach.

Mori beckoned us into his car, motioning for Teddy to sit in front and me to sit in back. With - her. Teddy shrugged apologetically at me as we climbed into the sleek black car, the cool leather seats cushioning me quite nicely. Mori started the engine and we pulled out into traffic as I adjusted my seat belt so it didn't cut into my tender stomach.

While Teddy and his boss conversed in the front seat, I sighed and looked out the window. Dusk had fallen and the storefronts were lighting up. The air conditioning in the car made me feel quite a bit better and I smiled, enjoying my first look at Nagoya.

"You're American?" Miyama said, her English startlingly good.

I concealed my surprise and nodded, "Yeah. Yeah, I am."

She smiled again. The smile.

"Where are you from?"

"Los Angeles."

Miyama nodded. I looked at the front seat, seeing Teddy and Mori engaged in a lively conversation. Without Teddy to tell me what the hell to do, I was lost. It was a very frightening feeling. My stomach turned over again.

"I've been to Los Angeles," She said, "It was very dirty."

I nodded, "You should try living there."

"No," She shook her head, "I wouldn't like that much."

I rubbed my forehead, feeling cool perspiration. When I pulled my hand away, I saw the watch. Looking at its expensive fascia, I couldn't help but feel ever so out of place. I swallowed again and winced at the taste of acid in my throat.

"Nice watch." Miyama said, her tone edgy enough to make me bristle.

Mori finally stopped the car at the restaurant, turning it over to the parking attendant as we got out. As the four of us walked in, Mori and Miyama exchanged words in Japanese. Topped off with the kind of snide laughter than immediately made me feel more than a little foolish. Teddy rubbed my back gently and the effect was counteracted somewhat.

He held the door open for me, "You okay?"

I nodded, my nostrils hit by the scent of food. The scent of rich, heady food that my stomach didn't like. We followed Mori through the dimly lit place, past tables and tables of equally hip-looking people. On the stage at the end of the restaurant, a large-scale karaoke act was going. A tipsy business man was butchering 'In My House' by The Mary Jane Girls, making me smirk in spite of my illness.

We were lead to a private room in the back, far enough away from the stage to dull the performing. I lowered myself down to the table, taking extra care not to jostle myself. The waiter placed a bottle of Sake on the table and, for the first time since I could remember, the thought of alcohol revolted me. As Mori poured glasses for everyone, I held my breath and tried not to inhale the scent of fermented rice.

Gently, Teddy nudged me with his elbow. I snapped back to reality and tried to look lucid. Thankfully, in the dim light, the sickly pallor of my face was hidden. Had they seen it, I don't doubt that the reaction would have been positive.

Then I noticed that Mori was looking at me. Intently.

"He asked what you do for a living." Teddy said softly.

I cleared my throat, "I work for a retail store."

Teddy translated. Mori smirked a bit and then tried to hide it. Even though he knew damn well that I'd seen him. More sweat rolled down my forehead as I mopped it with my napkin. Under the table, Teddy gently patted my knee, knowing how little I appreciated this sudden snobbery.

On the bright side, with the little national smackdown out of the way, I was ignored for much of the meal. The karaoke act switched to 'Caribbean Queen,' then into 'Like A Virgin,' followed by a rousing version of 'Money For Nothing.' It was 80's night, I realized.

The food arrived. Teddy was served something suitably steamed and non-fattening, Mori had the same, Miyama had extra pungent sushi, and my request for something light was honored. Chicken broth and water. Normally, it would have pissed me off but I was grateful for it - even if I was seen by these people as a tap dancing gorilla that shit itself.

As I sat there, talking my gorge into going back down, Teddy seemed much less 'nice' with Mori than he had before. A warm feeling filled me as I knew Teddy had recognized their behavior as well. Mori didn't seem to notice, however. He and Miyama kept going with their 'chic' banter as if nothing had changed.

Just as I managed my second spoonful of broth, the karaoke shifted to 'Ghostbusters.' Like a light had gone off over their heads, Mori and Miyama leapt to their feet and took off for the stage. They managed to jolt the table pretty well in the process, their combined Sake intake exceeding proper levels.

As they hit the stage, Teddy and I were left alone in the room. I began to mop up the spilled crap on the table, sighing to myself. In the process, they'd splashed a nice, thick miasma of wasabi, Sake, water, and other assorted sauces on the polished black surface. With a sigh, I did my best to clean up the mess, ignoring the smell and it's effect on my stomach.

"Have I mentioned how awesome you are?" Teddy said softly.

I couldn't help but smile.

"Don't you ever forget it." I said, about ready to give up on the table.

A few moments passed. I did my best to wring out the cloth napkin but finding it a pursuit in futility. If the restaurant wanted to take issue with the state of their private dining room, they could deal with the two drunkards on stage. With a resigned sigh, I tried to pick up the sake glasses and keep them from spilling further.

"You don't have to wear the watch anymore," Teddy said, his voice miserable, "I'm sorry I gave it to you in the first place. This was just a huge mistake."

I dropped the napkin and sat back down. Teddy was sitting with his head down, his shoulders sagging. I couldn't help but smile a bit, draping my arm over his shoulders and hugging him close to me. The sensation of his broad torso against me was a feeling I'd never gotten tired of.

"Let's face it, kid," I sighed, "We're hillfolk. We don't belong with the decents."

Teddy laughed and kissed me on the cheek.

"You wanna get out of here?" He asked, still laughing.

I frowned and looked out at the stage, "What about the boozehounds?"

Not saying anything, Teddy stood up and went through Mori's coat. He pulled out the car keys and stuffed them in his pocket. I smiled and stood up carefully, stretching my legs and minding my stomach.

Teddy sighed, "They can take a taxi."

-24-

The night after our outing with Teddy's business associates, I got my first taste of the rain in Japan. Sometime in the night, the sound of water hitting the window woke me up. I moved Teddy off me and got out of bed, my bladder feeling the effects of the water I'd drank during dinner. I'd never known how much water I could drink when trying to quell a rage deep in my heart.

On my way back out of the bathroom, I went over to the large windows and looked out. It must have been almost dawn because the gray sky was getting lighter in the distance. Or so it seemed. The rain streaks on the window made the view a little less than clear. The sound of the rain on the glass made me think of my first - time - with Teddy.

The mere thought of our encounter on that rainy afternoon make my knees weak and my groin tingle. The humid warmth of the air made goosebumps stand up on my body as I walked back into the bedroom, dodging boxes and bags on the floor. Under the sheets, Teddy was laying on his stomach, the brown skin of his back making my mouth water.

Stealthily, I laid down on the bed next to him and gently buried my face in his neck. I ran my fingertips down his body, gently stroking the skin of his waist and then his hips. My mouth lowered down between his shoulderblades and I kissed the skin lightly, only barely dragging my mouth over the surface. Underneath me, Teddy murmured in his sleep and thrust his hips against the bed.

Getting more impatient, I moved my mouth to his neck and kissed him, mashing my mouth against his skin. That time, it was more than enough to wake Teddy up as he squirmed under me. I raised myself up enough to let him roll over before pressing our bodies together, the warm sensation always exciting no matter how many times I experienced it.

Once he was lucid, Teddy mashed his mouth on mine and kissed me deeply. His tongue thrust into my mouth eagerly, his soft lips moving on mine. I let my hands move back down between us and I wrapped my fingers around his throbbing erection. Teddy groaned into my mouth and his hips tightened, thrusting his cock into my fingers. I squeezed him gently and stroked him slowly, feeling a thick leak of precum roll down the outside of my hand.

When I began to work my way down his neck, Teddy stopped me.

"You sure you feel up to it?" He whispered, short of breath.

I nodded just before taking one of his nipples into my mouth. Teddy moaned again and arched his back, thrusting his cock into my hand. I held onto it, tugging it gently as I teased his nipple with my tongue, tickling the areola slowly. Moving to the other, I swirled my tongue on the tip, teasing it to hardness under my tastebuds.

With a slurp, his nipple fell from my mouth and I licked my way down his chest and onto his stomach. I moved down the crease between his abdominal muscles and buried my tongue in his belly button. Filling the small space with the warm wetness of my tongue, I moved my hand to his taint, rubbing the sensitive skin with my fingertips. With the sensation, Teddy's cock throbbed and sent a thin spurt of precum on my adam's apple.

Nearly over the edge myself, I decided to not hesitate any longer. I engulfed his throbbing cock in one motion, rubbing my lips along the ridged surface. Teddy yelped and thrashed on the bed as I tickled his slit with my tongue. After just a few seconds, his cock swelled and the first gush of cum hit the back of my throat. It had been longer than usual as Teddy's cock let loose with what felt like a gallon of sperm.

Listening to his breathing, I cradled Teddy in my mouth as his penis softened gradually. After it went flaccid, I let it fall from my mouth, a thin string of cum connecting my lips to his slit. Gently, I kissed his balls and then his thighs, moving slowly back up onto his stomach. He reached down and ran his fingers through my hair, beckoning me upward.

Our lips met and the sensation of his tongue in my mouth sent a chill down my spine. The heat of orgasm past, our kissing was much more gentle and loving. I let my body rest on Teddy, his warm softness giving me goosebumps again in the warm air. Gently, Teddy rolled me onto my back and began kissing my neck, his hands moving down to the waistband of my underwear.

A surge of excitement shot through me. He curled his fingers around the waistband and pulled my underwear down, exposing my hard cock to the air. I squirmed, so aroused that I was nearly uncomfortable. The congested sensation in my groin was making my heart pound as my face flushed and sweat rolled down my face.

Suddenly, I felt Teddy's warm breath on my cockhead. Just that sensation nearly made me cum. Puckering his lips slightly, Teddy kissed the head of my cock. Stifling a groan, I squirmed against the damp sheets and swallowed hard. How he knew exactly what to do to me was still a mystery - one that I was in no position to decipher at that point.

Right as I felt myself losing it, Teddy engulfed my cock with his mouth, his soft lips sliding down the shaft. The hot, sucking sensation of his mouth hit me like a baseball bat, my cock so hard that it hurt. It only took a few strokes with his mouth before I felt myself go over the edge. I groaned through clenched teeth as my cock swelled and let it's first stream go, the slit tickled by his tongue.

It had been longer than usual for me too.

Once my orgasm had subsided and my breathing had returned to normal, I opened my eyes and wiped the sweat from my forehead. Teddy held my cock in his mouth until it had gone soft, then kissing my stomach and my chest before finally, my lips. The taste of my own cum was an acquired taste but at that point, I wasn't perceiving much of anything.

We laid there, sweaty and lax, for quite a while. I felt my cheeks cool down and muscle tension went away like magic. Somewhere outside, the rain stopped. Under the covers, I felt Teddy's warm weight on top of me, his soft skin as arousing as it was when we first met. Japan or not, it comforted me to know that some things, no matter how instinctual, would never change.

There was one thing I hadn't done since we'd arrived. It wasn't a major deal but in a way, it was. I'd used my illness to excuse actually doing the deed. I'd been only too happy to hole up in the apartment and watch CNN until my eyes bled. No matter how much Teddy encouraged me, I maintained that "when I was well," I'd do it. I just had to wait until my stomach was better.

After a few more days, it was. Then there was nothing stopping me anymore.

I knew I had to do it.

I had to leave our apartment on foot.

All the ground I'd made up when it came to living in a foreign country was fine and well. The only problem was that I'd done most of it back in comfy Los Angeles with the English speaking TV and the pizza without mayonnaise. Once I'd gotten to Japan, not to mention my encounter with Teddy's boss, the idea of going outside was intimidating. I wanted badly to go out with Teddy a few times so he could save me if I did anything offensive - but there was that pesky 'alpha male' drive.

To truly be comfortable, I'd have to do it on my own. The streets of Nagoya couldn't be that daunting and even so, there had to be an American Embassy somewhere. Plus I had the number and address of the school that Teddy worked at. I tried not to tell myself that a real man wouldn't need such help but I couldn't not.

After Teddy had gone to work (after delaying doing so to have sex), I bravely ventured outside the building. It was a warm summer day and the humidity was relatively low. With every five feet I got away from the door, I congratulated myself and took a deep breath. Every five feet added up and soon, I'd actually walked several blocks - in Japan.

I'd only passed a few people and the ones I made eye contact with were somewhat pleasant. By that, it meant that they hadn't kicked me or told me to go home or thrown rocks at me. That much was a relief. My camaraderie with the natives notwithstanding, I saw several stairways to the subway. That, I would wait to experience with Teddy. Just going outside was plenty of an adventure for that day.

Following the map I'd brought with me, I followed the route towards the neighborhood center. After a few minutes of courage building, I walked into a coffee-shop. As I approached the counter, I prayed that they could speak passable English.

They could and I had my first real coffee in nearly a week.

The goodness of the caffeine coursing through my veins was almost orgasmic.

Buoyed by the coffee, I ventured further into town and looked at the shops. I found it funny how much the same it was. It was exactly like home except for the foreign language and whatever social customs I was probably stepping on. Almost instantly, I felt at home. Like a huge burden had just been removed from my conscience. I felt great. I walked on down the sidewalk.

Then, just like that, the burden came crashing back down.

As I turned the corner around a market, I saw Teddy standing outside a video arcade. He was talking to another guy, a young-looking Japanese guy. As much as I hated to call myself a "rice queen," I had to admit that being with Teddy had adjusted my tastes in guys. Nine out of ten times, if I noticed a cute guy in public, the guy was Asian.

This guy was Asian. He was also very handsome.

Teddy didn't seem to have any noticeable attraction to the guy, but that wasn't what bothered me. It wasn't even that the guy seemed especially smitten with Teddy or had the goal of getting him in bed. By all appearances, their conversation looked quite platonic and non-sexual. At that point, I wished that they had some sort of chemistry. It would have bothered me less.

What bothered me was that they looked - right - together. They looked like a proper couple that could blend in on the streets of Japan. Well, blend in as well as two guys could. At least, they would blend in more than Teddy and I ever would. We would just never look right. Not in America and definitely not here.

My stomach churned and I ducked behind a large row of ferns. I felt a very frustrating lump in my throat as I hurried back the way I came. Suddenly, the streets of Nagoya seemed alien and foreboding. The people I passed seemed much more likely to make fun of me and see me as the square peg in the round hole. Which I was. Not only was I gay, I was gay and in love with someone whom I'd never look right with. The double kick in the balls.

The sight of our apartment building was a relief as I kicked a pebble along the sidewalk. I grumbled under my breath and went inside, trudging up the stairs. Each step sounded more pathetic than the last. Reflexively, I remembered to duck when I reached the top of the stairs, but part of me wouldn't have cared if I'd whacked myself on the wooden beam.

At least it would be some sort of feeling other than abject despair.

• TO BE CONTINUED ...

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