Since I've received the very first comment about the story, my fingers have been itching constantly. Every second I could find free on the computer, I spend typing this story. It's like a fever. Is it supposed to feel this way? OK, I'm probably sounding like an utter idiot now so I'll stop. Thanx to everyone who sent their comments, whether they were good or bad... I appreciate both equally. I'll do my best to respond all e-mails. If you sent me one and didn't get a response, I give you my word that you can kick me in the ass the next time you see me :) Now the usual stuff. I am not implying that any of the guys in BSB are gay or that they have any sort of relationship with vampires... although this werewolf I had coffee with couple of nights ago, told me the most amazing story about meeting AJ... well, it's his story so I won't spread it. If you're underage don't read... or read and try not to register what you're reading. Or even better, don't let your parents see you're reading. If you're offended, well, think about what your parents did to get you into the world. Trust me, there are things they did which you would consider less 'normal' than gay sex. Hey, did you know that oral and anal sex are illegal in Massachusetts? Sux for ppl living there.
Brian was standing alone, surrounded by darkness so thick that it could be cut with a knife. Out there somewhere in the darkness was the person that needed him... the person that searched desperately through that vast expanse of endless night. Brian could almost feel the person... feel his presence that seemed so strong but so different in the same time. Suddenly, some ten feet in front of him, a tall figure emerged from the darkness, like walking through black mist that grew thinner as the figure stepped closer. It was a boy, hardly old enough to be twenty; although he wore a trench coat, black like the night behind him and stopping just an inch short of his ankles, Brian could see the boy's muscled but slim built. He moved with a grace which Brian saw only once before in his life... in a wolf. Suddenly wary, Brian thought about stepping back and disappearing into the darkness. The desperation that he could still feel from the boy stopped him... somehow, he was sure that regardless of his appearance, this boy would never hurt him. Brian finally focused on the face, the bright, almost unnaturally green eyes, and long blonde hair tied in the back... blonde hair... Brian's eyes widened and he gasped: "It's you!" Stopping in front of him, the boy frowned slightly: "So you remember me... I had hoped...I wanted to make sure you're... nevermind." Brian just stared. His mouth was dry as dust. He wanted to say something, to thank this angel who saved his life, to ask him why he did it... anything. Instead he just stood there. When he finally spoke, it sounded more like a whisper: "Are you an angel?" "An angel?" The boy laughed as if Brian had made a joke, but when he spoke, his voice was harsh: "No Brian... I'm the furthest thing from it. My name is Robby." There was something about him that made Brian feel warm. Something about the way he said Brian's name, making it sound almost like a caress... Robby's eyes were cold and emotionless though, seemingly untouched by anything that he said or did. "Then how did you...?... my leg..." Shaking his head slightly, Robby stepped closer to Brian: "You already remember too much, and I have said more than I intended to. Hopefully, you won't see me again. Goodbye Brian." Reaching slowly, he touched Brian's forehead with his fingers. For one second, Brian thought he saw a twinge of regret in Robby's eyes, and then the ground opened under him. Screaming in desperation, Brian was falling, and falling, and... ...and he jumped up in a bed with a strangled yell. The sunlight was spilling into the room through the window, and for a second, Brian stared at the wall across from him, trying to recall where he was. The door shot open and Nick stumbled into the room, his eyes wide: "I was.. you were.. I mean I heard... are you ok!?" Staring at him for a second, Brian smiled slightly. Nick looked like a five year old caught with his hand in the cookie jar. He couldn't have heard Brian unless he was sitting directly next to the door, and Brian would bet anything that Nick was doing just that. "I'm fine Nick, I just had a dream." "It must have been some dream." Brian opened his mouth to tell Nick what he dreamed of, and stopped suddenly. He couldn't remember. Closing the door behind him, Nick frowned: "Brian? What's wrong?" Touching his forehead, Brian knew there was something... something very important. He had to remember. It seemed just out of his reach but still there, like a smell of the perfume still in the air, long after the person wearing it left the room. "Brian?!" Nick's voice was edgy now, his eyes wide with concern. Brian snapped out of his trance, and seeing Nick's face, smiled hurriedly: "I'm sorry Nick... it's nothing. I'm ok... it was just a nightmare." Sitting up in bed, Brian leaned against the pillows behind him: "Come here." In two steps Nick was on the bed next to Brian, with his hands around Brian's waist, and his head snuggling gently against Brian's chest. Smiling, Brian smoothed younger boy's blonde hair. Nick was almost like a kid sometimes, and being pushed into the show business at an early age, he was forced so spend years without his mom's love. He did see her every once in a while, but his singing career in Backstreet Boys always pushed him away from his family. During the day Nick worked as hard as everyone, but Brian had heard him cry night after night on their first tour in Europe. Hugging him tightly, Brian remembered getting up one night and walking to Nick's bunk. Nick had been crying softly for hours while everyone else slept, but when Brian touched his shoulder, Nick swallowed the sobs and told him to go away. Instead, Brian sat at the edge of the bunk and in whisper, told Nick how he missed his family, his friends, and especially his mom... how he sometimes wished that he could just go back and have a normal life... but then he would remember how much Nick and the other guys care about him, and he'd know that they are his family too. Nick had hugged him then, and still sobbing asked to sleep in his bunk. They fell asleep holding each other, that night, and every night afterwards through the whole tour. It had never felt awkward or uncomfortable, they never put it to question and the other guys never commented on it. To Brian, Nick felt natural in his arms... as if he belonged there. Looking down at Nick's face, Brain realized that the younger boy was already asleep, his head resting peacefully against Brian's chest. Pressing a soft kiss on the blonde hair, Brian pulled covers around the two of them, then settled determined to remember his dream and what was so important about it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Robby slowly opened his eyes, then stared at the ceiling without moving. His body hurt... he needed food. Slowly rising from the bed, he stumbled through the darkness towards the kitchen. His room was small and it basically consisted of a closet, bed, and a cabinet which was almost the same height as the closet. The kitchen was even smaller, having just a sink, a fridge, and a small table in the corner with two chairs, one on the each end of it. His knees seemed to be giving away with every other step, and a stabbing pain shot through his head just as he was crossing the dusty kitchen floor. Falling on his knees, he fought for air, for his strength and conscience which seemed to slowly be slipping away. On his hands and knees, he slowly crawled to the fridge, and pushing the door open reached for one of the plastic blood packs. Almost ripping it apart, he let the contents of it flow down his throat with barely enough strength to swallow. When the pack was empty, he reached for another one, and only after the third one, he felt strong enough to rise to his feet. Closing the fridge, he stumbled back to his room and collapsed on the top of the bed covers. His head and body still hurt, but all he needed now was rest... the worst was over. Curling up around the covers, he stared into the space. He couldn't understand why he regretted that Brian will not remember him. Although the consequences of it were painful, Robby had healed many people over the course of past 10 years, and he knew that there was no alternative. Then why did he feel like he lost something? Touching the third finger of his left hand, he wondered what made him give the ring to Brian. He had the ring ever since he was fifteen, when his mother died, and it had been hers for years before her death. Oddly enough, he didn't regret giving it away. Brian's face filled his mind, and Robby closed his eyes. How could a man be so beautiful was beyond him; so beautiful and in the same time so sad... so painfully sad that Robby felt like weeping after remembering what Brian's emotions felt like. That was something he couldn't heal, and it was the most painful thing of all. Deciding to let himself drift into the dreamless sleep, he kept a small hope that he will see Brian again. His last thoughts slipped his control and instead of falling into sleep with no dreams, Robby felt himself be pulled into the vast ocean of his fantasies; ocean which strangely resembled the warm color of Brian's eyes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Three hours later, Brian's back were stiff, his leg had fallen asleep, and his head was killing him. But he hadn't gotten any closer to remembering the dream. Nick was still sleeping, his breathing quiet and head still on Brian's chest. Brian hated to wake him up, but his head pounded painfully, and he desperately needed some Advils. Moving slowly, Brian made an attempt to place Nick down on the bed without waking him up. As soon as he moved though, Nick's eyes shot open. Brian smiled at him. Nick always looked so adorable after waking up, especially when he stretched over, and over, and over again, like a week old kitten begging for attention. Nick didn't stretch this time. Instead, he jumped up little startled: "Did I fall asleep on you again? Oh Brian, I'm sorry, I meant to let you sleep..." Brian shushed him and messed up blonde's already disarrayed hair: "Don't worry, I wasn't about to sleep anyway. Could you find me some Advils? I know Howie is a walking pharmacy but I don't think he'd want to see me now." Even before Brian finished the sentence, Nick was already hurrying towards the door and trying to comb his hair with fingers: "I'll get them. Be back in a sec." When the door closed behind him, Brian noticed long shadows on the wall across from window. His room had no clock, and he had not worn a watch in a great while, but by shadows he could figure out that the sunset is less than an hour away. He had slept through most of the day and did not even notice it. Suddenly becoming aware of the ring on his finger, he stared at it for couple of minutes. There was something about it which strangely resembled the feeling of the dream he could not remember. For a second he wondered how he had come by that ring, but then laughed at his own foolishness. The ring had been his forever, Brian was sure of that. Rubbing his forehead, he wondered what was taking Nick so long. Just as he was finishing that thought, Nick walked in with a glass of water in one hand and two small brown pills in the other. Handing them to Brian, Nick grimaced: "Kevin and AJ will be here in couple of minutes. They want to know what exactly happened." Sighing while Brian was swallowing the pills, Nick crawled up on the bed, making himself comfortable by sitting crossleged in front of Brian: "The management freaked out too, and Paul took all his irritation out on Kevin. We were only supposed to spend a week here, but since you disappeared again, we're gonna have to stretch it out to two weeks if not longer. You know how much Paul hates changing his plans." Placing an empty glass on the polished wood of the nightstand, Brian crossed his legs too and rested his elbows on knees. He could almost feel the medicine starting to work, although he knew that won't happen for at least another half an hour. Nick's words hurt. He knew that he messed up again and the whole band had to suffer because of it; staring at Nick's concerned face, Brian swore that it will never, ever happen again. He was not going to mess up their lives again if it killed him. Having no response for anything Nick said, he looked back at the shadows which seemed to inch slowly while he was watching them. Soon, Kevin and AJ will stare at him the same way Nick is, and the interrogation will begin. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The night enveloped the city like a black cloak, making people quicken their step whether they were coming back home from work, or were simply out on an evening stroll. No one wanted to be caught in a dark alleyway all by himself. Strange things happened in the night, especially where no light touched the dirty streets. People whispered of strangled screams, black creatures creeping in night looking for fresh blood. Those stories were not true, but only Robby knew how close they cut to the truth. His long coat flapping on the cold wind, he kept his face down and hands tucked in his pockets, making his way quickly down the Main Street. He didn't like the Main Street... no night creature did. It was always full of people no matter what time of the day or night it was, and the darkness was no protection under the bright lights of restaurants and various stores. He was the only one who could safely walk through those crowds of people without being discovered or taken over by the temptation to kill. There was a surprising amount of humanity left inside Robby. Mark and the rest of the Blood gang thought they knew how big of an amount that was. They'd be shocked if they knew the truth. Shocked and then angry... angry enough to make sure that this time he went through the gates of hell for sure. Sighing, Robby bent his head lower. He couldn't feel the cold but his body was still warm, and although his heart was long dead, his soul was still there. He was different... different enough to hardly belong anywhere. He didn't know why he chose the Blood gang. All he knew was that he had been put into this world for the second time, and there had to be a reason for it. Stopping in front of an overcrowded CD store he stepped inside nodding slightly to the owner, a small balding man with thick beard and a mustache. The man turned white that matched the collar of his shirt, but nodded back motioning slightly towards the back room. Robby walked through the clusters of people, offering excuses when brushing someone, and slipped into the back room closing the door behind him. It was cramped and dark inside, full of shelves loaded in CD's, t-shirts, and posters. What got Robby's attention though was a large black backpack in the middle of the floor. Kneeling next to it, he opened the cover and slipped his hand inside. Pulling out a bag made of thick plastic, he lifted it out in front of the small ray of light coming through the cracks in the door. Deep red liquid seemed alive, making the bag twist and bend quickly in Robby's hand. Nodding to himself, he placed the bag back, then throwing a backpack over his left shoulder, walked out. The owner still stood in the same spot staring at Robby with wide eyes. Had his face been any whiter, Robby would have gotten worried. Nodding to him and smiling slightly, Robby left the store not waiting to see the relieved expression on owners face. Making his way back through the Main Street, Robby kept close to the buildings and as far away as possible from the cars and the main stream of people. Although he tried to keep his eyes on the ground in front of him, he couldn't help but scan the crowd every couple of minutes. Convincing himself that he was only trying to notice something suspicious before it noticed him, he actually allowed himself to slip into the middle of sidewalk so he could have a better view. Half an hour later, he was back at his building without catching a glance of the thing he was looking for. He knew it was Brian he was looking for. It was useless denying it. It scared him, and the fact that he was scared of something terrified him. He had not felt fear once since the day he died... he had almost forgotten what it felt like. Walking into his cold apartment, he slammed the door behind him realizing he forgot to find a new lock. Not that he needed it anyway... no one was stupid enough to take anything out of his apartment. Still, the lock was a natural thing to have on the door, and he was desperate to surround himself with normality. Not that many things were normal any more. Showing the backpack in the fridge without opening it, he heard the annoying beeping sound of answering machine from his bedroom. Throwing his coat on the chair, he hoped the message was nothing important. He was wrong: "Robby, Mike here. Hunt is on for tomorrow night. We all expect you to be there. No excuses this time." Slumping down on the bed Robby squeezed his eyes shut, burying head in his hands. He wondered what excuse could he use now to go through the night without killing anyone. Knowing the Blood, it would have to be a good one. Well?? Comments? Ideas??