This is a story of love between two young men. If you are under age, or live in an area where reading stories that include sex between males is illegal, or if you're not into this type of story, please leave. The story began in 1969. While the characters and their story are completely fictional, it is set at places that are real and is told against a backdrop of some real events. This was a time when all sex was safe. It isn't now, so please respect yourself and others enough to always play safe.
I would like to thank all of those who have written to me over the past two years with comments, suggestions and encouragement, especially my fellow writers in the Nifty Six. Writing this story has been an amazing experience for me. I have been overwhelmed by the number of people who have written from all over the world who have been touched by this story of love.
The author retains all rights. No reproductions are allowed without the author's consent. Comments are appreciated at NJMcMick@yahoo.com.
Epilogue
Lucy and Brad were able to buy a huge old house only a couple of blocks from Billy, Danny and Aunt Connie thanks to the generosity of Brad's parents. Although they had talked about waiting a while to have children, Lucy was pregnant within six months of their marriage and gave birth to a daughter, Amanda, in the fall of 1976. Amanda was followed by Justin in 1979 and Emma in 1981.
Lucy continued working part-time with her photography as her family grew, but did less work for her old friend George and concentrated more on portrait commissions and freelance magazine work. She developed a good reputation in New York and after her children were all in school her career flourished.
Brad's fellow POW Craig and his wife Cindy moved to New Jersey and he and Brad started their own engineering firm in the late seventies. Brad became interested in local politics and by the late eighties had been elected to the town council in Morristown. He moved up to a seat in the state assembly in 1993 and in 1998 he was elected to Congress where he has focused his energy on human rights and veterans benefits.
In the summer of 1975, Mark and Joe moved into an apartment in Hoboken. They lived there for three years until they bought a rundown old townhouse a few blocks away. They made a hobby of restoring the house over the next ten years. Mark stayed with Lambda Legal for twenty years and then went into private practice. He donates his services as legal counsel to the Alliance and a few other local gay organizations. On occasion he still works with Lambda Legal. Joe worked for St. Vincent's Hospital for several years as a physical therapist. In the early nineties he joined their faculty and now spends most of his time teaching physical therapy.
Peter and Hank turned out to be a good match, better than Peter and Mark had been. They both had the same philosophy toward relationships and enjoyed their open relationship into the early eighties, when Hank developed pneumonia and was diagnosed with AIDS. He passed away less than three months later. In 1985, Peter was also hospitalized with pneumonia. His family disowned him when they learned of his condition, and soon he was too ill to work. Mark and Joe took him in and cared for him. He lived with them until he passed away in early 1987.
Charles went to Rutgers and graduated in 1980 with a degree in sociology. He got his masters in social work in 1982 and joined the state division of youth and family services as a caseworker in the foster care program. While an undergraduate, Charles met Aaron, a business major, at a meeting of the Rutgers Gay Alliance (formerly the Homophile League). They dated for a while and got an apartment together in Highland Park across the river from campus their senior year. After graduation, Aaron left for graduate school in California and they ended their relationship. Charles moved back to Morristown and took the apartment over Aunt Connie's garage. When Aunt Connie sold her house in 1986 Charles was ready to buy. The year before he had started dating Bernie, a minister with the Metropolitan Community Church in New York. When Charles bought the house Bernie moved in with him and started a congregation in Morristown. As the AIDS epidemic created many more orphans than the state could find homes for, Charles and Bernie became foster parents themselves. When it became possible for gay couples to adopt, they adopted their five foster children.
In 1981, at age 60, Aunt Connie retired from teaching and devoted her love and energy to her five grandnieces and grandnephews. In 1984, she was diagnosed with breast cancer. Following a mastectomy and radiation treatment and chemotherapy, she was pronounced cancer-free in late 1985. The next year she sold her house to Charles and moved in with Brad and Lucy. She continued 'having coffee' with Dr. Stern until he passed away in 2000.
Tyler and Jason followed their fathers to Rutgers. Tyler graduated with a degree in biology in 1996 and took a job with a major pharmaceutical company a few miles from Morristown. He married his college sweetheart Diane shortly after graduation and they have three children, daughter Samantha and twin sons Jordan and Jared.
In 1998, Jason received a masters degree in public administration. He works for Uncle Brad managing his district office in Morristown. In 2000, he married Anna, whom he had met while vacationing in Portugal. They have a son, Luis, and a baby daughter Elisabeth.
Frankie and Joanne are still together, still active in the Alliance and live in Maplewood.
The pokers guys are all still around. They don't live close enough to play poker anymore but do still get together a few times a year. Tim and Evan retired in the mid-nineties and still live in Plainfield where they are active in the gay community that has grown there. Clay bought a condo in one of the new high rises built along the Hudson River in Jersey City and is currently on the national board of Men of All Colors Together. Ash and Tommy bought a bed and breakfast near the beach in Cape May. They insist they are just friends. On retirement, Mickey bought a small piano bar in Asbury Park, where his steady customers have become a family to him.
In the summer of 1979, Dr. Swanson was arrested for soliciting an undercover cop at the rest area on I-287 south of Morristown. When it was reported in the paper, he was forced to resign from his job as principal of Chatham High School. His wife divorced him and he left the area in disgrace.
"And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make." John Lennon-Paul McCartney
February 2004
Billy
We had about four or five inches of snow overnight, so first thing Saturday morning Danny and I were out shoveling, clearing the cars, the driveway and the sidewalks. Afterwards, we spent a few hours grading papers, a common weekend routine. We were having a late lunch of soup and sandwiches when we heard the front door open and close. A few seconds later, Tyler and Jason appeared in the doorway from the hall.
"Hey guys, what brings you out on a cold snowy day?"
"Jase and I were over at Mom's for lunch, Pop, and decided to walk over."
"You didn't bring the kids?" Danny craned his neck to try to look past them into the hall.
"Gee, Dad, I remember a time not so long ago when you we were enough for you."
"You still are, Ty. So what's new?"
"Well, Dad, everyone got together for a little family meeting over lunch and we were chosen to come speak to you two."
"Uh-oh, that doesn't sound good, Billy. Maybe we're being drummed out of the family. We're usually invited to these little meetings."
"Yeah, well, this meeting was about you two, so you weren't invited. You tell them, Ty."
"Okay. We've all been talking for a few months now, ever since that court decision in Massachusetts. Basically, we think you guys should get married when it becomes legal up there in the Spring."
Danny and I just looked at each other. I raised an eyebrow and nodded to him.
"Pop and I have talked about it ourselves, boys. You know how much we've always wanted to get married, but we want to do it here. There's a court case going on right here in New Jersey now that may legalize gay marriage in the next year or two."
"We're tired of waiting, Dad. Everyone is. I'm sure you are, too. Besides, Gram is ninety-five. She's a tough old bird but she's not going to be around forever. She wants to see you two get married." Jason gave Tyler a look that showed he'd played their trump card.
"Believe me, boys, we want Gram at our wedding, whenever it is, but I think I read that they may only be allowing residents to marry up in Massachusetts. That disqualifies us."
"Uncle Brad has had me look into their laws. The situation is a little fuzzy. You guys have the condo in Provincetown. That may make you residents even though you're only up there in the summer."
"Besides, I read that P-town isn't going to be as fussy about details like that as some other places in the state," Tyler added.
"But we can't haul the whole family up there. There are just too many people."
"We've figured it all out, Dad. This is what you're gonna do. In July, New Jersey's domestic partnership law goes into effect. You'll be up in P-town then, so that morning, you'll go to town hall and get married by the town clerk or whoever. Then you'll fly down here."
Jason paused and Tyler took over.
"You'll stop at the town hall when you get to Morristown and register for domestic partnership. Then, that evening, we'll have a big reception with all of the family and all of your friends. Bernie said he'd officiate at a wedding ceremony before the party. That way, you get all of the legal stuff taken care of and everyone still gets to be a part of it." Tyler nodded his head, as if to say there was no room for further discussion, that the decision had been made.
I looked at Danny and sighed. "They're ganging up on us again. They've been doing it a lot since we turned fifty. What do you say, Danny?"
"It sounds like it's doable, Billy. They've covered all the bases. We'd be married in Massachusetts, registered in New Jersey, and if the court case here is decided favorably, New Jersey would then recognize the marriage."
"But where would we have this reception? You have to book most places over a year in advance."
"Diane took care of that. She's got a small ballroom at Headquarters Plaza Hotel reserved. Since she's an event planner, she's got connections."
"Okay, Tyler, you've convinced us." I looked at Danny. "It looks like we've got a lot of work to do between now and July."
"You guys don't have to do a thing. Mom, Diane and Anna are going to take care of everything. All you're going to have to do is sign the legal papers and show up. Right, Jase?"
"That's it. You guys have always taken care of everything for us. Now it's our turn to do something for you. It won't even cost you anything. We've talked to Uncle Mark and Charles. Everybody's chipping in. We've got it covered."
Danny looked at me and smiled.
"It looks like we're finally gonna get married, Billy."
July 2004
Danny
The boys were right when they said they'd take care of everything. While they asked our opinion about things, they handled all of the details. We didn't have to lift a finger, with one exception. We had to write our vows. That wasn't as easy as it sounded. I thought it might not be as hard for Billy since he's an English teacher but he struggled as much as I did. How do you put thirty-five years of amazing love into words? Even after we went up to P-town we were still working on it. I must have written ten pages and crossed it all out, ending up with only a couple of sentences. Words just don't cut it.
The evening before the big day, we were leaving the condo to go to dinner when we saw Lucy walking up Commercial Street toward us.
"What are you doing up here, girl? You're supposed to be in charge back home."
"Don't worry, Billy, everything is under control. You boys didn't really think I was going to let you get married in the morning without me, did you? I've been with you right from the start and there's no way I'm missing this."
"You're fantastic, Luce. We know that the real celebration is going to be tomorrow night and everyone will be there, but Danny and I were feeling a little weird about going to town hall alone in the morning. After all, that's the legal part."
"You guys aren't ever alone, Billy. We're all with you, all the time. You'd better believe that everyone will be thinking of you at nine tomorrow morning."
At nine the next morning, the three us were at town hall with the town clerk officiating at the brief ceremony. I was trying to save my emotions for the ceremony back home, but the impact of those few minutes with the town clerk hit me pretty hard. From the tears we were all shedding, I could tell it was going to be a weepy day. We went right from there to the airport and caught a plane across the bay to Boston. After a short layover at Logan, we were on the plane for the half-hour flight to Newark. Lucy had left her car at the airport, so she drove us to Morristown, where we stopped at town hall and completed the paperwork to register as domestic partners. After that, we went back to the house and had the afternoon off to rest up for the evening's festivities.
Billy
I couldn't take my eyes off Danny all through the brief ceremony at town hall in P-town. I guess I was having trouble believing that after all these years I was finally marrying my white boy. Lucy talked most of the flight home but Danny and I were pretty quiet, both lost in our feelings. After we got back to the house we took a nap so we'd be fresh for the rest of the day's events.
The deal with the hotel included a hall that was set up something like a church for the ceremony as well as the ballroom for the reception. It also included a 'honeymoon suite' so we took our tuxes over to the hotel to get dressed there. While we were finishing up, Bernie and Charles came in.
"Damn, you guys look hot. You should wear tuxedos all the time."
"I don't think that would look quite right, mowing the lawn in a tux, Charles."
"You know what I mean, Danny. I just don't get to see you dressed up very often. Then again, you guys always look good to me. You're my parents."
"Aw, and you'll always be our baby boy, Charles. I'll bet you never thought you'd see me and Danny walking down the aisle."
"Not when you guys kept insisting it had to be legal, but here we are. I'm so happy for you."
Bernie briefly went over the ceremony with us. The MCC had a commitment ceremony but because this was actually a follow-up to a legal marriage (although in another state), he had inserted some of the traditional wedding phrases. After they went back downstairs, Danny and I checked each other over one last time. His tie was a little crooked so I stood behind him looking into the mirror and adjusted it for him. I had to admit we made a handsome couple. Our engagement rings were glistening in our ear lobes.
Danny was looking us over too but he started to frown.
"So how come I've got all this gray hair and you don't have any, Billy?"
"Just genes, Danny. You know Gram didn't start to go gray until she turned eighty. Besides, you don't have very much gray and what you do have blends right in with the blond. It's hardly noticeable."
"Well, I see it. I still don't think it's fair that I keep getting older and you don't. Do you have a portrait in the attic I don't know about?"
I turned him around to face me and looked him straight in the eyes.
"The reason it looks that way to you is because you see me the same way I see you. We don't look at each other with our eyes, Danny. We see each other with our hearts. And my heart always has and always will see you as that sweet seventeen year old boy I fell in love with all those years ago."
Danny wrapped his arms around me and held me tight, kissing me passionately. The kiss seemed to go on forever; I was hard in no time and I felt Danny pressing into me. I was beginning to wonder just how much time we had before we had to be downstairs when the door opened and Brad and Mark walked in.
"Jeez, we're gonna have to steam you two apart. I'll bet you're both leaking all over your pants and we don't have time to clean them."
"You always were the romantic, Mark."
"And you two were always the horndogs, Billy. Everybody's waiting downstairs. It's time to get this show on the road."
"Okay, if you insist. Do our best men have the rings?"
They each pulled a small black box out of their pockets.
"Then I guess we're ready. Let's go put on a show, Danny."
Danny
We got into position outside the hall downstairs. Brad was going to walk Billy in, followed by Mark and me. When the doors opened the crowd inside quickly quieted down. Brad and Billy went in. After a few seconds, Mark and I followed. I nearly stumbled when I saw how many people there were. We hadn't discussed the exact guest list with Lucy, just occasionally reminded her not to forget this one or that one. But I had just assumed that our family and close friends would come to fifty or sixty people, somewhere around there. But there had to be well over two hundred people in the room. As I walked down the aisle I looked left and right. It seemed like nearly everyone we had ever known was there; friends from long ago, fellow teachers, students we'd kept in touch with, members of the Alliance, even a few coworkers from The Restaurant. Of course, our families were all up in the front. It was hard to believe that many people were a part of our lives. I was pretty dazed by it all and didn't pay much attention to Bernie when he started the ceremony. I think Billy and I were both a little overwhelmed.
After the opening part, Bernie paused and nodded to me. Billy and I turned toward each other and held hands. I cleared my throat and took a deep breath.
"Before I met you, Billy, my life was a puzzle of pieces that didn't fit together, that made no sense. You were the piece that completed it, that pulled it all together, that made sense of everything. For thirty-five years, your love has supported me and held me together. You have made my life possible. If we had a hundred more years to be together, it wouldn't be enough time for me to give back to you all that you have given me, but I promise that I will spend every day of the rest of my life trying to show you just how much your loves means to me. I love you so very much."
"Danny, when I met you, I had no hopes, no dreams. I was a cynical and bitter kid. Your love and idealism have lifted me higher than I ever thought possible. Because of you, I have hope. Because of you, I have dreams. Your love has made everything possible for me. Your strength has carried me through life. Your goodness and decency have shown me just what life can be. I only hope that I have been able to return your love in a way that has meant as much to you. I love you with all my heart and soul and am yours forever."
Billy and I just stood there, lightly holding each other's hands, looking into each other's eyes, tears trickling down our cheeks. Bernie softly cleared his throat and we turned back to face him.
"William, do you take Daniel to be your lawfully wedded spouse, to love, honor and cherish as long as you both shall live?"
"I do."
"Daniel, do you take William to be your lawfully wedded spouse, to love, honor and cherish as long as you both shall live?"
"I do."
Mark handed me Billy's ring as Brad handed Billy mine. We fumbled for a minute, slipping the rings onto each other's fingers.
"I now pronounce you legally married." Bernie looked back and forth between us and smiled. "You may kiss the groom."
Billy and I turned to face each other and looked into each other's eyes. He smiled at me and leaned in. His lips brushed lightly over mine, then pressed harder. We both parted our lips a little and touched our tongues together. As we pulled apart and turned to face the crowd, they all stood and burst into applause. Billy took my hand and we slowly walked down the aisle, smiling, crying and nodding at our friends and families. I think most of them were crying more than we were.
Once outside the room we were led down a hall to the bar to give the others a chance to move into the ballroom. It also gave us a chance to have a drink to calm our nerves. Even though the ceremony was over, the intense emotion of it was causing us both to tremble. After a few minutes, we were led to the ballroom where we were officially introduced to the crowd as a married couple.
We must have spent the next thirty minutes circulating through the crowd, accepting congratulations from all. There was so much hugging and kissing going on. It was a wonderful feeling. I knew that this was about Billy and me, but it was about all of them as well. These were the people who had loved us and sustained us. They were all pieces of our wonderful life.
We had worked our way through the room and talked to almost everyone for a least a few seconds when the DJ announced that it was time for the grooms' first dance. Billy took my hand and led me to the center of the dance floor. We stood there waiting for the music to begin. It was so romantic but I was actually a bit nervous, standing there in front of everyone, about to dance for them. Billy, as usual, knew just what to say to take my mind off it.
"Now this is going to be a slow dance, Danny, so you don't have to imagine my dick up your butt. Not unless you want to, anyway."
I blushed. Yeah, after thirty-five years he could still make me blush. The music began-Luther van Dross' recording of 'Always and Forever'. Billy took me in his arms and held me tight. We hardly moved, just swayed to the music a little. He whispered in my ear.
"How is it possible to love one person so much?"
"I don't know, but I'm glad you do, Billy. You've kept me going all these years."
"No more than you've done for me. And after all this time, we're actually married, Danny. You know what that means, don't you?"
I pulled my head off his shoulder and looked at him with a question in my eyes.
"You're stuck with me now, white boy."
"And you're stuck with me, black boy. Forever."