This is a story of love between two young men. If you are under age, or live in an area where reading stories that include sex between males is illegal, or if you're not into this type of story, please leave. The story began in 1969. While the characters and their story are completely fictional, it is set at places that are real and is told against a backdrop of some real events. This was a time when all sex was safe. It isn't now, so please respect yourself and others enough to always play safe.
I would like to thank all of those who have written to me with comments, suggestions and encouragement, especially my fellow writers in the Nifty Six. The author retains all rights. No reproductions are allowed without the author's consent. Comments are appreciated at NJMcMick@yahoo.com.
July 1975
Billy
As the school year came to an end, the rest of our lives were getting busier. Danny and I were getting reacquainted with our families, a little at a time. I had a head start with Mama, but my sister Sharon and her family were a bit of a problem. Sharon joined us for dinner at Mama's a couple of times but her husband, Duane, wouldn't come. He wouldn't let her bring my nephew Will either. The first time we got together it was obvious that Sharon was there under duress. I'm sure Gram had put some pressure on her. By the end of the second visit, she was starting to loosen up. She wasn't quite back to the fun big sister I remembered but I saw a glimpse of the old Sharon here and there. She said she was working on Duane, but didn't think he'd be coming around for quite a while, if ever. She said that Duane changed shifts at work every couple of months and that once he went on the second shift she would start bringing Will with her.
Danny had better luck with his family. His parents were taking a while to relax around us, especially me, but they were trying. His sister Sue had married a guy named Al and they'd moved to Connecticut, but they were close enough to come visit on the weekend now and then. Sue seemed to follow her parents' lead in handling the gay issue and Al didn't seem to have any problem with us. The most laid back member of the family was Danny's grandfather. His only reaction to meeting me was a gruff, "It's about time," and after that I was part of the family as far as he was concerned.
Brad went car shopping with us once again and helped us pick out a new Toyota. We used some of the money we had left over to make repairs on the old car, but we still had several hundred dollars left. Danny and I were talking of setting up college funds for Tyler and Jason, but everyone ganged up on us and insisted we spend it on ourselves and do something fun with it. We had spent so many years being careful and responsible with money that we didn't know how to let loose and just have fun. We had no idea what to do with the money so everyone kept making suggestions. When Lucy remembered that Paul and Kenny had invited us to visit them in San Francisco, everyone insisted we go. The idea was tempting but we came up with all kinds of reasons not to go.
"But your wedding is coming up soon. We can't go away now."
"Danny, Brad and I aren't getting married until the end of July. You've got plenty of time to have a nice vacation before then."
"Besides, all you guys have to do for the wedding is just show up. The way Lucy's got everything under control I could even go with you guys."
"No way, Brad, I'm never letting you go anywhere without me again. I'm not taking any chances on you getting lost again."
"Okay, you don't need Danny and me to help out with the wedding, but what about Ty and Jase?"
"Billy, I'm their mother. I think I can handle them. You were able to take care of the boys without me when I went to Hawaii. Besides, Brad can come stay at the house and help out. It'll give us time to practice being married."
"Yeah, I'm sure help with the boys is the reason you want Brad here. But what about Charles?"
"Oh, get real, Mom. I'm gonna be seventeen in a month or so. Even if Lucy and Brad weren't in the house and Aunt Connie and Mark next door, I think I could take care of myself for a couple of weeks."
Danny and I just looked at each other.
"Well, babe, it looks like we're going to have to go. Everybody seems to want to get rid of us."
"Yeah, Billy, it looks like we can't get out of it. Maybe if we try real hard we can have a good time."
We called our old friend Eddie who was still working as a travel agent and he booked our flight for us. Since we were staying with Paul and Kenny we wouldn't have any other major expenses for the trip so it would be a pretty cheap vacation. Once school was out the time just flew and early in the morning of July 5 Brad and Lucy drove us to the airport. After all of the trips we'd made dropping others off and picking them up, it felt strange to be the ones who were leaving. We checked our bags, said our goodbyes, and found our way to the gate in plenty of time. We sat and talked about all of the things we wanted to see on the trip. After a while I realized that I was the only one talking. Danny was being even quieter than usual.
"What up, Dan? You feeling okay?"
"I don't think so. I've never flown before. I think I'm scared."
"Well, I've never flown either. I'm a little nervous too. It's only natural."
"No, Billy, I'm way past nervous. I don't know if I can do this."
Just then they announced our flight was beginning to board. Danny was looking very pale and was trembling.
"There's nothing to be so upset about, Danny. Thousands of people fly every day. It's perfectly safe."
"Yeah, I keep telling myself that but the message isn't getting through."
"Are you feeling sick?"
"No, my stomach is a little unsettled, though. I'm just not sure I can get up and walk onto the plane."
"I'll help you, baby. Don't worry, I'll be with you every step. Everything is going to be fine."
I got up, took Danny's hands in mine and pulled him to his feet. As soon as he was standing, I put my arms around him and held him tight. I gave him a little kiss on the lips.
"It'll be fine, Danny. You'll be fine. Come on."
I picked up our carryon bag in one hand and grabbed Danny's hand with the other. I slowly led him toward the gate. As I looked around I saw lots of people staring at us, most looking surprised, a few appalled, but I just ignored them. I gave our tickets to the stewardess and we went down the walkway to the plane. It was a wide plane with two aisles. Another stewardess directed us down the aisle and I found our seats, two by themselves between the aisle and the window.
"Window seat or aisle, Danny?"
"It doesn't matter. I'm probably going to have my eyes closed the whole flight."
I had him go first and I sat in the aisle seat next to him. I stuffed our bag under the seat in front of me, got us both buckled in and then took Danny's hand and just held it.
"Just breathe deep, Dan. Relax."
Danny
I was so looking forward to the vacation and tried my best not to think about the flight. I knew my fear of flying was irrational and figured that it would go away by the time of the trip. I was successful in keeping it out of my head until we were at the gate at the airport. Then I felt like I was glued to the chair and would never be able to stand up when they called our flight. Billy was so comforting in gently nudging me onto the plane and into my seat. Once we were seated he was so tender and attentive. He managed to calm me down as we seemed to taxi forever, but as the plane started to pick up speed for the take-off, I was terrified. I squeezed Billy's hand so hard it must have really hurt him but he responded by pulling me toward him and kissing me. Not just a little peck on the mouth like in the terminal, but a passionate, open-mouthed kiss. He pried my lips open with his tongue and kissed me deeply. I grabbed onto him and kissed back with everything I had in me. I lost track of time and everything else but when we finally pulled apart the jet was high up in the air and was starting to level off.
"That's disgusting. You two should be ashamed of yourselves."
We both turned and saw a very prim-looking middle-aged woman who looked totally appalled sitting across the aisle from Billy. Billy was about to say something to her but I cut him off.
"Don't pay any attention to her, Billy. She's just jealous because no one has ever kissed her like that."
She glared at me and turned to look forward. Billy and I grinned at each other and he gave me a little kiss on the cheek. It must have been the take-off that had been worrying me because I was feeling a lot better. Billy held my hand the entire flight and fussed over me but I didn't really need it. I didn't tell him that, though.
I was fine until the plane began its descent into San Francisco. I wasn't too nervous, figuring we were coming down any way so nothing could go too wrong, but as we got lower and lower I didn't see any land below us, just water. We were coming in over the bay but I kept thinking that sooner or later there would have to be something solid to land on. We seemed to be only twenty feet above the water and about to land when the runway appeared below us and we touched down a second later. Both Billy and I let out huge sighs of relief but I don't think our hearts got back to normal until we were in the terminal.
Paul and Kenny were waiting for us at the gate. After a lot of hugging and kissing and a few hostile glares from other passengers, we headed to the baggage claim.
"So how was the flight, guys?"
"Perfect, no problem at all, Kenny." I didn't want to admit how scared I'd been.
Billy just looked at me and raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, piece of cake."
Even with my good sense of direction I was completely lost by the time we got to their house. They explained they were in the Sunset district a couple of blocks from Golden Gate Park and got out a map and showed us where we were. Due to the time difference it was still only early afternoon, so after a simple lunch the guys took us on a quick car tour of the city. They took us through Haight-Ashbury and I was disappointed to see it wasn't a hippie stronghold any more. We drove down Market Street into downtown, then went up a hill past Chinatown and eventually came down to the bay near Fisherman's Wharf. We were both pretty amazed at how steep the hills were. What impressed us even more was how clean the city was. We were used to cities like Newark and New York.
By the time we got back to the house Billy and I were starting to drag so we decided to take a nap. Of course, we ended up getting a little exercise and tiring ourselves out even more once we got to bed, but we did manage to get some sleep. The guys took us to dinner at a gay restaurant in the Castro, San Francisco's equivalent of New York's Village. The place was nice, more casual than The Restaurant, and the food was a little different, but we both loved it. Paul explained that the whole California lifestyle was more casual than New York. After dinner we stopped in a few bars, but made it an early night. In spite of the nap it had been a long day and it was three hours later for Billy and me.
The next day was Sunday so the guys took us for a drive north of the city. We crossed the Golden Gate Bridge and had lunch in Sausalito. We wandered around there a while and then went on to Muir Woods, a redwood forest. Next came a part of the trip that was nearly as scary as the flight. We drove along the Pacific Coast Highway high above the ocean. The road was winding and dropped off nearly straight down several hundred feet to the water. Billy and I were both relieved when we got to Stinson Beach and could get out of the car and walk for a while. Unfortunately, we took the same road back. The views were incredible but I still wasn't happy with the road.
Paul and Kenny had to work all week, so Billy and I found our own way around the city every day. A trolley stopped at the end of their block and took us to Market Street. From there we either walked or took cable cars the rest of the time. I loved the cable cars but we never ended up where we thought we would. The hills made everything so confusing. At one point, Billy pointed at another hill and what we later found out was Coit Tower.
"Remind you of anything, white boy?"
"Maybe if it was dark brown in color."
"Hold that thought until we get back to the house, Danny."
Although we didn't go out to bars much when we were home we felt like we had to on vacation. We tried everything, from a piano bar on Polk Street to the leather bars on Folsom. The time just flew by, sightseeing during the day, going out to eat and barhopping at night. Two nights before we were to leave we took Paul and Kenny out to dinner to thank them for their hospitality. We'd planned a romantic evening alone together for our last night. Billy and I went to dinner at a restaurant near Fisherman's Wharf. Afterward, we took the cable car up Nob Hill to the Mark Hopkins Hotel, then went up to the Top of the Mark for drinks. We sat at a small table by the window, sipping our drinks, looking out over the beautiful city and the bay. Billy reached across the table and took my hand in his.
"This is so wonderful. You know, Danny, we've got to do this more often."
"Do you mean the dinner, the drinks, the view or the whole city?"
"I mean the whole trip. Do you realize that this is the first time in the almost six years we've been together that we've been away alone?"
"Yeah, as much as I love everyone back home, it has been so great just being with you. I enjoy every minute we spend together at home, no matter who else is there, and we do get lots of moments to ourselves, but this has been so fantastic. A real vacation. You're right, we do have to do this more often."
"We have a great life at home, but you're all I need, baby. You are my life. I love you so much."
"No more than I love you, Billy."
When we got back to Paul and Kenny's house, they had gone to bed so we had to be quiet, but we still managed to make one last beautiful memory of our trip to San Francisco.
Lucy
All of my years of taking pictures at weddings were paying off in putting my own wedding together. I knew everyone in the business and knew who was good and who wasn't. A lot of them owed me favors, so even though we only had a few months to plan the event it all came together pretty smoothly. Having the reception at the Heath's house in Mendham gave us a lot of flexibility. Once all of the decisions were made I didn't have much to do other than checking up to make sure nothing was being forgotten.
I loved playing house with Brad while the guys were away. It wasn't exactly a love nest for us, what with the babies and Charles there, but it was a taste of what life would be like after we were married. Charles was working at the A&P again for the summer and divided his spare time between his school friends and his new friend, Earl. We almost never saw him so most of the time we weren't planning the wedding, it was just Brad, the boys and me, playing house.
Brad was still adjusting, going through mild mood swings, spacing out at times. He was doing better than when he first came home in January, but it was slow going. Tyler and Jason seemed to have a good effect on him. I knew that they did that for Danny, calming him down, keeping him on an even keel when he would otherwise get stressed. They did the same thing for Brad. He seemed to spend half his time on the floor playing with one or both of the babies. It was hard to believe that I'd been so concerned about how Brad would react to their presence.
One evening after we'd put the boys to bed, Brad and I were cuddling on the couch in the living room. I'd spent so many evenings watching Billy and Danny do that. It was so great to have my own man home to cuddle with.
"So are you feeling like you're getting back to normal, Brad?"
"With this family, who knows what normal is?" He gave a little laugh. "If you're asking if I'm functioning better, feeling more like my old self, the answer is yes, most of the time, anyway. It's funny, all of the time I was away, I kept trying to remember every detail of what our lives were like back here. I dreamed of coming home and finding everything exactly the same, of stepping right back into the world I'd left."
"And you came home to so many changes."
"Yes, it was very disconcerting at first. I was not only still having to deal with the terrible memories from over there, I felt like everyone's lives had moved on here without me, like I didn't fit anywhere anymore."
"We'd all moved on, but not without you, Brad. As each of our lives changed, we took you along with us. We each had a hole in our life, a space that only you could fill. None of us was complete without you."
"I realize that now. In fact, I'm glad that things changed, that everything wasn't exactly as I left it. If I'd come back to find you still living next door with Aunt Connie and Billy and Danny still up in the garage apartment, it might have been more comforting the first day, but I would have had a harder time in the long run. Seeing all of the changes here helps me keep the past in the past. I have so many great memories of our life before I went away, and they'll always be with me, but now it's time for something else for us. The same with what happened over there. I have all these horrible memories, and unfortunately they'll always be with me too, but because life keeps going, they can stay in the past too. I'm probably not making any sense."
"It sounds a little confusing, Brad, but what you're saying is just that the past belongs in the past, whether it was good or bad. We have to live now. All of that is over."
"Yeah, it sounds clearer when you say it. It's just important to keep moving. I spent a couple of years standing still and I don't ever want to do that again."
"As long as we're moving together, that's all that I care about."
Billy
The last couple of days before the wedding everyone was going crazy. Every little glitch seemed to be a major crisis. Part of me was glad Danny and I were back from vacation to help out. Part of me wished we could have stayed away until the last minute and gone right from the airport to the church. Danny and I didn't have anything to do with the wedding so we helped out by taking care of Ty and Jase, leaving the happy couple to deal with all of the last-minute crises. I think that we were all concerned that the stress might get to Brad, but he did fine, better than Lucy actually.
The big day finally arrived. Mama and Danny's mom came to the house to baby-sit their grandsons. An unexpected friendship was beginning to develop between these two women who had blamed each other for their unhappiness for so long. Danny and I had bought new suits for the occasion. We didn't wear suits very often so we figured these would last a while. We got Charles a suit as well. He was still growing, so he probably wouldn't get as much use out of it.
The wedding was a little bit traditional, a little bit not. Brad and Lucy didn't want a traditional kind of wedding party, so they just had a best man and maid of honor. Brad chose Mark for his best man, no surprise, but Lucy couldn't decide between Frankie and Joanne. They finally flipped a coin and Joanne won. So the small but traditional looking wedding party included a gay best man and a lesbian maid of honor. Lucy was absolutely stunning in her white gown. We'd teased her that with two babies at home, white might not be the appropriate color, but she replied that it was the only color for a wedding to her true love. She chose not to be given away and walked herself down the aisle. Her feminist side had insisted that she was not a piece of property to be passed from one man to another, but at the rehearsal dinner the night before she said that if her Uncle Evan were still alive she would have been honored for him to walk her down the aisle. Brad had gained back most of the weight he had lost and was nearly as beautiful as Lucy, standing in front of the altar in his tuxedo.
Aunt Connie sat with Dr. Stern in the front pew. She quietly sobbed through the entire ceremony. Danny, Charles, Frankie, Joe and I were in the second row. Behind us were an assortment of Lucy's high school and college friends, people she'd worked with and members of the church. The other side of the aisle had more people, with Brad's parents up front and Mark's family behind them.
As they got to the part in the service where Brad and Lucy were going to exchange vows, I turned to Danny and whispered.
"When they get to the 'I do' part, let's say it along with them."
Danny gave me a puzzled look. "Why?"
"Hey, we're in a church, it's a wedding, and we may never get another chance to say 'I do' to each other like this."
"Okay, sounds good to me."
We heard a loud 'Sssh!' from behind us and I turned to see a woman I didn't know frowning at us from a couple of rows back. I gave her my nastiest sneer and she turned away. Just then, the minister asked Lucy if she would take Brad as her husband. Danny and I whispered 'I do' as Lucy answered. As Brad and Lucy embraced and kissed, I reached down and took Danny's hand in mine and squeezed. I glanced over at Danny and there were tears running down his cheeks. A few tears had escaped my eyes as well.
Danny
I wasn't sure I was going to get through the wedding without bawling like a baby. It wasn't just that it was a beautiful service. Brad and Lucy both looked beautiful, but more than that they were so happy. We all were. This was a day that we had all wanted for so long and we had all been pretty sure that it would never happen, but miracles do happen sometimes.
The party afterwards in Mendham was incredible. Brad and Lucy had wanted to keep it fairly simple, but the Brad's parents insisted that this was a once in a lifetime celebration and money was no object. Knowing their reputation for garish taste, we were all concerned, but Lucy had been in charge of the details. The Heaths' role was limited to paying the bills. There were two huge tents sent up behind their house. The tables were set up in the larger one. The smaller one had a dance floor and the band. There was a bar on the patio by the pool.
Everything was perfect, from the flowers to the food. The service provided by the catering staff was excellent. Even the band was great. Billy and I had gone out dancing a couple of times in San Francisco but it was so much more fun in an atmosphere like this. I think we were on the dance floor more than we were off. While Brad and Lucy had to circulate and spend time with their guests, they also got to dance quite a bit. At one point, they were out on the dance floor with Billy, Charles, Mark, Joe and me and we formed a circle and danced together. It reminded me a little of spring break at The Copa in Ft. Lauderdale. There were a few different faces, but it was the same exhilarating feeling.
With Billy and me, Mark and Joe, and Frankie and Joanne, the other guests got pretty used to seeing same-sex couples dancing together. Even so, Brad caused quite a stir when the band started in on a slow song and he grabbed Mark and pulled him onto the floor. He put his arms around Mark and the two of them danced. Both were crying when the song ended.
The reception was winding down and Brad and Lucy were saying goodbye to some of Brad's relatives. The gang was taking a break, having a drink on the patio. Aunt Connie came over from the bar with a glass of wine in her hand.
"I don't know when I've cried so many tears of joy. This has been one of the happiest days of my life, one I was afraid I might never see."
"I think we all feel that way, Aunt Connie," Billy agreed.
"Yeah, I'm so happy for the two of them. They both deserve so much happiness after all they've gone through. I'm a little jealous, though."
"Jealous, Danny? What have you got to be jealous of with Brad and Lucy?"
"Well, Joe, Billy and I have been engaged a lot longer than Brad and Lucy. We should be the ones getting married."
"Engaged? You and Billy are engaged? No way!" Charles exclaimed.
Oops. One too many glasses of wine. While Billy and I occasionally talked about our engagement to each other, and our earrings had so much significance to us both, we didn't talk about it much in front of others. Maybe it's because we realized how silly it was to even think about us getting married. It wasn't silly to us, we both knew how much we wanted it, but we knew that others would think it was silly. Two guys getting married, that wasn't gonna happen. It didn't mean we couldn't dream, though.
"Well, white boy, you brought it up so I guess you'd better tell everyone the whole story."
I very briefly explained that Christmas Eve so long ago when Billy had shocked me by proposing on the street in the Village. I tried not to make it sound like a big deal, like we seriously thought we might get married, but I think it was obvious to everyone that it was a pretty special memory to me.
"You don't really think the state is ever gonna let two guys get married, so you? That would be so bizarre."
"Yes, Charles, it would be very different. And Danny and I don't expect to be walking down the aisle any time soon. But maybe someday, if attitudes change and laws change with them. Maybe someday."
"Well, I think it's sweet. Before I met you two boys I had as many prejudices as anyone, but you two are the most romantic couple I know. I hope things do change for you, but I hope it doesn't take too long. Nothing would make me happier than to dance at your wedding, too."
"Thanks, Aunt Connie. Billy and I will each save you a dance."
"Speaking of dancing, I think the band is just about to finish up. How about one last dance, Danny?"
I took Billy's hand and he led me back to the dance floor. We wrapped our arms around each other and swayed to the music. It had been such a perfect day, such a happy day for all of these people we loved so much. And I was in the arms of my Billy.
"Do you think it'll ever happen, Billy? Do you think we'll ever get married and have a wedding like this?"
"It's a nice dream, Danny, but I'm afraid it won't happen. Society doesn't change that fast. Change is coming, but probably not in our lifetime."
"Yeah, you're right, I guess. Still, as you said, it's a nice dream."
"As long as you don't mind 'living in sin' the rest of our lives, that's all that matters to me."
"Mind? I'm counting on it. A lifetime of being loved by you? I couldn't ask for more, Billy."
"Neither could I, Danny, neither could I."
The End.