Ask Me

Chapter 73

I allowed Teddy to buy the bat because if that's what it takes to make him feel safe, then that's what he gets.

He told me on the way home he thought his dad would have bought him one; that's why he waited. I know Con has always had a big one under our bed and it never occurred to me that Teddy would want one too. But it all made sense in the end, they both have been scared shitless in their lives, and it's just a comforting thing.

When we got back there were three messages from Adam calling me all the sons of bitches in the world, he was too busy to help Di out and I should do it because I'm lazy and sit around the house all day getting fatter. I stood in front of the mirror, nope no fat I chuckled to myself, I will set Adam straight after I solve the next problem. I sent Con a message explaining what had happened at the shop and wondered if he could fix it on the way home. I got a thumbs-up as a reply, then a 'be home in an hour, thanks I love you.'

Ted and I placed the bat under his bed and he tested that he could reach it just in case anything happened. I did play with the thought that we could ask Grant to stay in his room at night time, but that might be a bit scary and a little tempting for Con and me.

He swaggered down the passageway with a long parcel under his arms. After kissing me and Teddy he placed it on the table.

"What's that dad?"

"It's a present for my son, I had to wait until I found the right one, and as soon as I saw it today, I thought. Yes, that's it that's what will suit him perfectly."

He passed it over to Teddy and he unwrapped it with a big grin on his face. The baseball bat was larger than his small one.

"Wow daddy, you didn't forget me, I love this one." He screamed as he hugged his daddy. Tears threatened as I looked into my boy's excited face.

"Well I am sorry I took so long, but I had to get the right one for my son. I wouldn't settle for just any old bat." He smiled at Ted's face. Something went off in Ted's head and he placed the new bat on the table and ran to his room. He came back with his kids one and handed it to me.

"Here dads you can have my old one, now we all have one each." He grinned, so clever that son of mine.

"Thank you, Teddy, its just what I wanted, now we can both help daddy bop any nasty people on the head." I kissed his head.

"Come on daddy we better find the bestest place for it." He grabbed a smiling Conner's hand and dragged him up to his bedroom. They had been gone a long time so I went to see what was up. They were laying on the bed talking softly I overheard Con say.

"We both can protect dads because he loves us so much."

My tears did arrive so I straightened up and went back to the table to do my ship. I had no idea where they were up to, it looked great anyway so I looked in my freezer and took out some steaks for tea.

My boys came back and both of them hugged me, then Ted had to attend to Benny. He fed him and changed his water. Con picked up his droppings, we won't let Ted do that because he may get an infection or something. The steaks were popped into the defrost cycle in the microwave and it rotated for half an hour while I peeled some veggies. John came in and took one look at me.

"What are you doing?"

"Steak and veggies." He took my knife off me and started chopping some pumpkin up. I watched as he took more steaks out of the freezer and started defrosting them.

I went back to gluing the bits that Con passed to me. My son wasn't interested he was watching a football replay. To make something wonderful out of nothing must be a great gift. Johns steak and veggies were to die for and as I sat at the kitchen table with my family I was in awe at the wonderful people surrounding me.

Di rang me in the morning she wanted to run some things past me. After John took Teddy to the supermarket with him, Con and I walked down eight doors and rang her bell.

He went straight for Hope and little Brenten, Di grabbed me and sat me at the table. I was covered in color charts and drawings.

"Hell Di, have you been working on this all night?"

"No, silly. These are from when I did this place, and I want to get your opinion on these four sets of colors, I thought I would stick to the four and do each flat on each floor a different shade."

"Sounds good to me Di."

"Well, I am so excited to be doing it, I just wanted to see you and get your approval."

"Why?"

"Because your good at these things I'm still learning." She smiled.

"Did you ring Adam?"

"Yes, he's excited and will be over late this afternoon so I need your approval before he gets here."

"Again why?"

"Because I don't want him to think I'm dumb."

"Okay do the flats this basic color, the features this one and the hallways this one, as for the other one do the foyer in that."

She stared at me.

"What?"

"You have no idea do you?" She said.

"Don't tell anyone Di but I flunked art at school." She burst out laughing as I took little Brenton off Conner and started playing with his fingers.

Sometimes it works with me sometimes it doesn't, my ability to make quick decisions comes from my nursing. But I do think in the end its the fact that they do make sense, and I do put a new slant on things.

Take Jenny for an example, I know she wasn't happy at work, Bob told me, and I knew she would get a kick out of talking to stars and celebrities that privately book our plane so it's a no brainer in the end. Di has been in the business for years she should know what color goes with what, the ones she picked out were fantastic and wherever she places them is her decision I have complete confidence in her.

Con decided he needed some cake so we bundled the kids up and made Di take a break from it all. We walked down to nans for coffee and I rang John to meet us there on his way home.

"Look Di, I don't have all the answers but I have a lot of confidence in you to do these jobs. When you put in your exorbitant account you can rent a shopfront or use your modeling contacts to gather more work." I smiled as I watched Conner dig into his vanilla slice.

"When Adam is on board the jet he can work on your designs and hopefully make them greater. But you do all the basics like choose fittings, and I got to say too that vintage is so in at the moment and the flats are vintage." I smiled.

"Okay, I think I just needed some of your confidence, Brent, I'm okay to do it, just a little nervous." She smiled as she placed Hope on her lap so she could feed her some baby chino.

"What does Marty think about it?"

"He thinks I can do it, he's very happy I have found something to do actually."

"He's probably thinking about the money Di." I chuckled along with her.

My boy arrived with his granddad, he all smiles and hugs then he ran off to find his mates in the kitchen.

We sat in the sun for ages, Conner was talking to Geoff the owner about doing a gig for him, and Teddy was listening just in case he was needed to do some dance moves. It was a very pleasant day and as we dropped Di off at her place I made an appointment to get some botox happening again. I had slackened off over the past month or two and wanted to top it up.

Dinner was light and as we ate we discussed the flats and then it was Conner's turn. He's going to retire after the Hobart gig. I wasn't at all surprised, but I was concerned he would miss all that atmosphere. He said he was going to write for the next five years and see where that takes him and then he can work on his special project in his spare time.

I inquired what it was, he nodded Teddy's way and smiled at me.

I had just pulled off him and grabbed the hand towel to wipe up when he started telling me what he wanted to do. That was to see that Ted has the best childhood and I get more attention. By the way my ass was throbbing, I think he's doing a fine job of attending to me. I argued that he might miss the bright lights he said he didn't want to be an old rocker pushing his same songs at every concert. He was happy he has been able to do what he has done and proud of his work. He will write for now, and he has a huge catalog of songs out there already.

I didn't know if I would miss my rock star but I knew it was a turning point in our lives, an opportunity to see where we go from here.

He wasn't concerned about Marty, although Con is his biggest client he's not the only one on Marty's books.

"I have been asked to do Australia's got talent as a judge baby, maybe I will do that for a start."

"No, please don't do it. Only has been singers do that sort of work you're much better than that."

"Well, what do you suggest then?"

"Write hit songs and produce a musical play, maybe it will go to Broadway your son can dance in it." I smiled.

"That's way out of my league."

"Yeah sure, it's out of your league at the moment, but have a think about it, all you need is a great idea and you're good at that Con."

"Okay can you think of one too and we can compare notes?"

"Of course baby, but first my bums itching want to scratch it again?"

We slept soundly no noises coming from Teddy's room, but a few grunts from our bed had exhausted us both.

Ted has school tomorrow and I spent the next day getting everything ready, I will miss him being around I kind of like his company. He helped me by finding his backpack and pencil box then we sat and did some coloring in while Conner worked on the ship.

"Shouldn't you go to work Con?"

"What work Brent?"

"Your new stage show, it's not going to write itself you know."

"But it's only an idea, it's not even in my head at the moment."

"Well you can't sit around here all day why don't you ask your son for some ideas, he watches TV a lot maybe he's got something to add." I grinned at our son who was all ears.

"What do you want me to do daddy?"

"I want you to help me think up a stage show, a theme, so I can write some songs and I want loads of singing dancing in it too." Conner smiled down at his son who was now deep in thought.

"Daddy you can make up one about me and daddy Brent and you at the football oval playing." He's got a good idea a football show.

"You can make it like a kids show Con, so make your songs kids ones." I offered my opinion. He looked at me but was pretending to look at a piece of the ship, then he winked.

We bantered back and forth for most of the morning then it was time to get to the park as John reminded us his lunch basket was ready to go.

Teddy got into his uniform and we were off to go get some exercise.

The others were turning up and Grant had those Lycra shorts on again, I did spy Con and Andy having a perve at them. I knew Grant was aware of it too because he kept adjusting his bulge when he looked our way. I didn't look because I know my dick would be so hard I wouldn't be able to run around our track. Mrs. Green was walking up the path and John was the first to see her.

"Oh my god here comes that woman be on your best behavior." He smiled as she stopped at our table. She was offered a salad roll and she took one and sat for a minute. She was off to check that everything is okay it the school for tomorrows classes. I did notice she looked at Conner and John I suppose she's waiting for a bad word to be said, but they did behave and I noticed John struggling to find nice words to say.

She was asking Con about his concert tour overseas and Andy didn't say a word his mouth was well and truly locked shut, but I could see the fear in his eyes.

"He's a sight for sore eyes isn't he Brent?"

"Who?"

"Grant your minder, he's got a great shape going on in those little shorts today."

"Yes he has Mrs, Green, he's a great guy." I smiled.

We watched as Grant posed like a peacock, as he threw the ball into the player's circle.

"Bubby lift your game, there's no bloody glory in being a slouch." He yelled at bubs.

"Got you." That Green woman said and immediately got up and approached Grant.

"What the bloody hell are you talking about lady, I got a game to umpire, and I don't do homework."

"One hundred lines on my desk in the morning please Mr. Grant." she smiled at us as she walked back our way, we all tensed up.

"Well, seeing you all are behaving yourselves today, I thought I might just widen my horizons. Have a nice pleasant day won't you all. And Brent, make sure he does his homework." We let our breaths out as she skipped away towards the office block.

"What's she on about Conner?" Grant screamed.

"Just do the homework Grant, otherwise Bubby will have to do it for you."

Screaming with laughter we couldn't contain ourselves, Grant knew from early in the peace what the homework thing was all about. I think he's as pleased as punch he's now been included.

He took a roll and lifted his leg onto the bench giving Andy a full-on show of his bulging underwear, I saw tears forming in his eyes and started to chuckle along with Conner.

"Run Mr. Richards?"

"Of course Mr. Walsh, Grant take care of Andy will you, he looks a little pale." We laughed our heads off as we ran towards our track.

In Conner's life, there is always something happening. He did a music award night a week later, then he told me he has retired again. That was just before the Hobart concerts so he's never going to retire fully and every time he mentions it, I do chuckle quite loudly.

It was the week after Hobart Marty came by waving a contract under Conner's nose. As I made coffee I could hear him saying to Con over and over again that he has to do this, he just has to. I sat with them as Conner read some of the big contracts, he had a memory stick in his hand and as he read he looked at me then at the stick.

"Do you think I can do this Marty?"

"Conner, I don't know anyone else in this game that could do it as successfully as you would. And anyway they want you specifically to do it, Conner, you did do the last one for them. Its a big pat on the back for you, and a great way to get your music out there."

"What's the gig, Conner?" I thought maybe America was on the cards again, so much for retiring.

"A new Disney movie baby, they want me to write the whole score."

That's huge, even for Con it's huge. Him moving into the movie industry again would be awesome.

"Sounds good to me then Con, what's the hold-up?"

"I wanted to retire, but this is a whole other level."

"He will do it, Marty, where does he sign and how much is the pay?"

"No Brent its not done like that, we have to negotiate." Poor Con.

"No negotiations Con, just do it."

"I can't just start writing tunes, I have to think about it, Brent."

"If you won't do it for me do it for your son and his mates."

He scratched his head and asked Marty if it was a good deal, he answered by saying it was the best deal and he gets a percentage of the movies gross takings. Then he rubbed his hands together seeing he gets twenty percent.

Conner wasn't convinced, but he did slip the memory stick into the TV and we sat to watch snippets of the movie. it was an underwater one and I did see the little mermaid was in it, her red flowing hair gave it away. There was a big list of what he had to do and after he went through it, he signed the contract. I could see his brain was turning it over and he also had a smile on his face.

If he accepts the job he will then go to the Gold coast to talk to the producer and music department.

Marty was very happy as he shoved the contract back into his briefcase, he hugged us both and left to go see his family.

Conner was speechless as I made him a sandwich and more coffee, he looked around the family room and sighed. I knew he was secretly jumping up and down inside because now and then he had to squash a smile.

As if a bomb had been lit under him he searched for his folder of unfinished works and started looking through it. he pulled out a piece of paper and placed it on the table.

"The first one is done, and overall theme music in the can." He grinned.

"You have some theme music that will suit the movie already?"

"Yes, baby, I think so, the melody is superb and will be perfect for the background music too."

"What's it called Con?"

"It's working title is, Can you heal my tears. I only have to tweak it a bit and the soundtrack is done, I wrote it ages ago, but I don't know yet if the words will suit the movie they may be too top heavy." He kissed me then went on.

"I need a piano, maybe John and Ray will let me use theirs."

"You have the keyboard Con use that."

"Not good enough, I need a proper piano."

"Okay baby we will go buy a baby grand tomorrow."

"I can use Ray and Johns"

"Okay if you're sure, can I see it?"

He handed over the music sheet, I knew I wouldn't understand the music but I did read the lyrics. I didn't show any emotions just read, reread and read again as Conner's beautiful words touched my heart my hand reached for his, it was beautiful.

"Please play it for me Con." I needed to hear this song.

"Come with me." He took my hand and we both went into Johns place. He was sitting at the kitchen table making out a shopping list. Con asked him if he could use his baby grand and of course, the duster cloth came out as we moved to the front room.

"It may need tuning Conner it's been a while since you have used it." John wiped it down but I couldn't see any dust anyway. Conner went through the keys as he sat down and placed the sheet music on the holder.

John and I sat on a small sofa and waited to hear the melody.

My bottom lip fell as his hands moved swiftly over the keys then it started to shake as I tried to force my emotions down. John had tears streaming down his face as Cons voice touched our hearts. When he finished we were stunned into silence. I couldn't find any words to describe how wonderful that song was.

"She would be pleased you are playing it again," John whispered.

Conner looked at my blank face and said.

"I wrote this before Beth passed away on this very piano, that was the last time I touched it, and sang that song."

I knew it had to mean something to him, he never sings anything meaningless, and his complete broken-hearted sorrow was laid bare in this song. Every word was carefully thought out, he was saying goodbye to his Beth. You could hear a pin drop in that room today if it wasn't for the clock in the hallway ticking away you would think the world had stopped still.

"You talk, I'll make coffee, that fixes everything." John with glistening eyes smiled as he left us to it.

"I thought I would never record it, Brent, it has been sitting there all these years and it seems appropriate now to let it come out into the sunshine." He moved and sat with me, my arm went around him and I started kissing his head.

"I hid a lot of my grief in my songs, back then, it was you that changed my writing style, and you that healed me from that never-ending storm. Don't ever think I don't know your jokes, and quick wit is only hiding the hurt you feel inside. You only show it to me on the outside but on the inside, we are two of the same." That was it, all I needed today and the flood gates opened. Mainly because I always felt so scared and I didn't realize that Conner felt the same way. I should have known, I should have looked more closely. Teddy wasn't the only family member that lived his life being scared all the time.

It wasn't up to either of us to heal ourselves, we both know that awful demons will plague us until we are separated from this earth. The trick is to not let it control us.

"Con, let's go have some coffee and talk about the movie with Johnny, okay?"

"He stood up and took my hand, then we both walked out into Johns bright welcoming kitchen.

"Can I use your piano John, I can buy one but yours is in top shape, and it's a shame it's not being used."

"Of course son, what's this about any way I thought you wouldn't publish that song in a million years."

"Well I have a new contract with Disney and it would make a piece of great theme music for the cartoon."

"Okay, if you're sure, do you want us to have it moved into your place?"

"I suppose it would be better if it was on hand but let's wait and see, if it gets too much for you we can move it in next door," Con replied.

"I could never tire of listening to good music on a piano son, and this house is empty some days so you can knock yourself out then."

"Good." He took his phone out and walked out into Johns back yard, after hanging up the biscuits were ready and we started destroying them before they cooled.

"I will pick Teddy up today, are you both going to the park?"

"Yes John," I said.

"John, can you have him for a couple of nights?" Conner asked out of the blue. John stared at him and said.

"Of course we would love that, you know we would."

"Good."

"What are you up to Mr. Conner?" I asked as we drove to the oval.

"I want to go to Sydney on the weekend and thought Teddy might like a sleepover with his granddads Friday and Saturday nights maybe Sunday night too. I don't want to stay away from him for too long."

"Why don't we just take him with us?" He looked over at me and replied.

"Can't do babe, what I have in mind would curl his hair if he saw us."

"Oh, so that group sex thing with Grant and the boys is happening at long last is it?"

"Do you want it to happen?"

"Of course I do, I bag's Phil's ass first." I laughed so loud the lady in the next car gave me a sour look.

Conner started laughing with me and I still had no idea why he wanted to go to Sydney on the weekend.

Ted met us in the car park and got his cuddles in before he had to start work, he was happy to be back at school he had missed his mates and he told me they haven't stopped talking about their holidays all week. Bubby was sitting next to John and he was showing him a piece of paper he had printed off. I didn't know that John could read the market, but the smile on his face was big as he praised Bubby's windfall. Some of his shares had taken off beautifully. I took the paper and saw some big figures, so I said.

"You have to talk to grandpa Ray and Shane about this Bubs, they may want you to sell seeing they are at such a good price."

"Okay, but I think I will keep them if you don't mind." He looked down.

"Then keep them, they are your shares and if you think they will turn into blue chip then make an executive decision to hold onto them. These figures are bloody brilliant Bubs, you have done very well I'm so proud of you." I blurted out, sometimes my mouth just gets so far ahead of me.

"Okay boss." Bubby smiled then laughed his head off as he went to kick the footy around with his buddies.

"He was looking for a pat on the back John," Andy said.

"I know, but business is hard and if he's seeking pats on the back it tells me he's unsure of his decisions. Brent just fixed that or should I say his big mouth has. It's okay Andy I will have a quiet talk to him when there's no one around." John laughed at my face.

Run Mr. Conner?"

"Of course Mr. Brent."

I dropped my sweats and started walking over to the big track, Conner went to the small one. I looked over for a second and he moved over to my side shaking his head. He won't get out of not doing his exercises, and he's not doing an easy run today either. We started on our run, he watched my ass and I watched his, a pretty normal day for us at the park.

When we got in I emptied Teds lunch box and Conner was sitting at the table reading that contract. Ted was out the back checking Bennies water and dry food then he wanted a banana milk shake. I obliged him and handed it to him as he watched his cartoons.

I noticed Con was leaning into the contract like he couldn't see it properly.

"Turn the light on Con, you will see the writing better." He didn't answer me so I turned the light on. He moved out a bit I thought he may need reading glasses soon. I had better make an appointment with the eye specialist. In the meantime, I opened the kitchen drawer and took out a pair of the two-dollar magnifying glasses I sometimes use to read the smaller print, like the TV guide.

"Here try these Con." I handed them to him and sat opposite. He tried them then straightened up.

"That's better I think my eyesight is going Brent but these make it easier."

"Well they are only magnifying glasses Con we had better go and see a specialist soon."

"No, I think these are okay for now."

"All right, but you will let me know if they get worse won't you?"

He kissed me and thanked me then went back to his reading. I didn't get an answer but I had better watch him.

"Its only the fine print I can't see properly Brent, otherwise I can see perfectly." He said as we snuggled in for the night.

"Well, we better test you then."

"How?"

"Have a look at my dick and see if it's got a smiley eye Con." He didn't need to be asked twice.

He was making notes in the morning and tinkering on his guitar, Teddy was ready for school and looking forward to his sleepovers with his granddads. He made me promise I would buy him something from Sydney, he only wants something small so he tells me.

When John arrived Conner ducked into their place to use the piano, he wasn't seen again until I took some coffee into him at lunchtime, John said he had been hard at it. I didn't want to disturb his creative moment so I stayed away. I spoke to Jenny she had started work and I wanted to give her a job to do. She sounded confident and said she would organize a crew for the smaller plane I insisted it is Phil and Dave. She laughed down the phone and said.

"I wouldn't dare deprive them of your company for the flight brother, leave it to me, mommas got this one." I laughed with her, she said that little Conner comes with her and at the moment he was crawling from desk to desk saying hello to the other workers. She thought he might end up in Bob's office with him. My heart fluttered and I thought this was a real family business after all, and Con will have a ball being spoilt rotten.

I sat with my Conner and had coffee with him.

"How far have you got this morning Con?"

"I have done heaps baby; I just have to fine-tune it all then it's done, they might not like it anyway." He laughed.

"How could they not love it, it's beautiful. A piece of cake for you Con, have you got anymore buried in those folders?"

"Heaps Brent, but nothing I can use for this movie."

"Okay if you need a hand just let me know." I grinned.

"Umm, you can get on your knees and pull me off while I play if you like." He grinned.

I did my thing on him after we closed and locked the door. His notes were loud and urgent by the time it was over.

"Thank you," he said.

"My pleasure."

"I know." He giggled.

It was lunchtime and he followed me out to go have a sandwich, but John cornered us and placed a big tray of croissants on the table with some ham cheese and assorted other condiments. I wasn't going to argue with him so I sat and grabbed one.

"How long do you have to do this score son?"

"About six months John, the main theme is done, I think they will accept it, it's the other songs that will do my head in. I have to get a copy of the full movie synopsis so I know what sort of feeling I have to place in them."

I understood and I thought maybe an explanation on the scenes would be appropriate. Conner had that covered, he said he flies to the Gold coast later next week for his first meeting with the music people.

"When are you flying to Sydney Con?"

"Friday afternoon John, I want to be there for Friday night." He definitely up to something again.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because it's the best place to start this new journey, sunshine beach ocean the whole box and dice. I don't want to go out anywhere except to the beach with my husband." I understood, but we should be going snorkeling at the Great Barrier Reef, not Sydney. I suggested the change in scenery but he said that will come later but he wanted to show it to Teddy, he was worried that he's only been back in school a week or two and he will miss some school days if we go there.

"I need to get that beach feeling going guys, we will go to the reef, Sydney's only a starting point, and I need to go to Sorrento too."

"Well if you want the beach feeling Conner go visit Golden Bay, I hear there are some serious looking surfers that hang around that bit of our coastline."

"Nah, there's nothing there Brent, I already checked it out on the net." Not what I heard, but if he's already checked it out then we better not go there, might be a bit boring. I might investigate it more thoroughly.

He was finished for the day and asked John to pick Teddy up, we won't go to the park today he has some things to talk to me about in private. John was more than happy to do it so I checked out Ted's sleepover drawer in Johns room and deemed he had enough clothes stored for a few days, then I took my man and his sheet music back home.

"Now tell me why you want to start in Sydney Con." We were sitting on the sofa watching TV but not watching if you know what I mean. He was making notes in his book, he put them down on the coffee table and kissed me long and gently.

"I want to be with you, we never get to do anything together anymore, the past three months have been stupid as for us. I just want you to myself for a weekend. Teddy's getting older and he's much more settled now, so I thought the time was right for us." He kissed me.

How could I argue with that, he's quite correct we never seem to be alone anymore only at night time, and most of that time we are too tired to do anything. Not that we miss out on having sex it's just that it always seems that it's over before we even start. I have felt that disconnection more than once and it seems that Con has picked up on it too.

"Good, we can lose our clothes after we close the door and live like hippies all weekend," I said smiling.

He groaned and asked if I had told Jill and Sarah. I told him I gave a list of things to do to his new secretary, Jenny. I had told her to get the fridge's stocked up and we would need the spare apartment for Phil and Dave. I added that's unless he wanted them to bunk in with us, then I would cancel their apartment.

He chuckled and said it was a great idea but he didn't think Phil and Dave would be walking around in the nude all day in front of us. I smiled at the thought, but soon put that away when he started playing in my shorts.

"Let's have an early night instead Con, maybe leave it until then."

"See what I mean, apart from the blowjob under the piano today we don't have any fun anymore."

I held my hand out and said.

"Come with me handsome." I don't think I can wait until tonight anyway.

I let Conner do whatever he wanted with me today, and as I looked into his beautiful eyes he slowly pumped a shit load of man juice inside me.