WARNING this story contains graphic descriptions of hot man 2 man sex. If you are offended or too young to read it go away. Otherwise enjoy. This story is based on real characters and real events. While creative license has been used to enhance the tale, and obviously the names have been changed, the general storyline is factual. The characters in this story were living in a place and time when diseases were not so common. Be responsible and don't make love without a "glove".
Ciao Dante-
The jet floated down feeling for the runway, I'd been awake the whole flight to New York, and this flight to Cleveland, thinking about Joel, his Mom, and my folks.
I knew the sadness Joel was experiencing with his Mom, I'd warned him about it.
My Mom and Dad live just outside Cleveland, I had grown up there. The little town was a suburb now but had been a small town when I lived there. Like all small towns it had been peopled with small minds, and non-conformity was discouraged in the nicest way. I had grown up with the expectation I would live the American dream. The first indication I gave that that wasn't going to happen, was when I was 6 and told my Dad that I wanted to be an Artist. He had joked and asked me if I didn't want to grow up to be a Doctor like him. Later, when I was older I played baseball and basketball as an attempt at conformity, but I think by then my folks were convinced that I was "different". They were well educated and reasonably well off. Then my sophomore year in High School, they gave in to my idea and decided to send me into the city on Saturdays for lessons from Harold Steinman a local artist of some merit. This was really an attempt to get me to see that artists didn't make lots of money and worked very hard indeed. I loved every minute of those hours in Harold's smelly studio. He heated it with an old coal stove and the odor clung to everything year round. Harold was classically trained and had spent a few years in Paris before the war. He introduced me to drawing first and then watercolor. He also asked me one day if I was "gay". Now keep in mind this was about 1977, Freddie Mercury, Elton John and the whole studio 54 thing was going on in places like New York. Even Cleveland had its trendy gay community. I remember telling him quit honestly that I didn't know, but I was thinking about becoming a priest, as I sanded yet another gessoed canvas. That was my conformist answer to non-conformity. He was a very observant man, as an artist he had had to be, so I think he knew. He had told me that would be a waste as I had a lot of talent and attitudes elsewhere weren't like here. Now, looking back, I wonder if Harold was hoping for a little "action" but I was already living for my Art, and was too young to know. It taught me one thing though, to hide any trace of my desires. I grew into a very reserved young man. I continued to try for conformity, but the drive to paint was causing problems and I was starting to get constantly harassed at school about being "queer", not for any overt effete behavior, but because anyone in a small town who does anything the least eccentric is subject to scorn. Preferring to spend Saturday in a studio with a guy instead of on the ball field or chasing girls was, to my small town, plain strange. How much of this harassment actually got me to thinking along those lines and how much was genetic I'll leave to the scientists, but by the time I was a senior I had had sex with one of the guys in my class, and I had another passion to share time with my pursuit of art. Old Harold told my folks that I should be sent to a formal art school, much to their disappointment. We chose the Art Institute in San Francisco, after much soul searching. The city was eye opening and I soon joined the party crowd. The rest, as they say is history. I never told my folks and in all honesty I wondered now if, like Ian's parents, they guessed and hoped it would go away. I know that over the intervening years talking to them always left me sad and dissatisfied. Of course for a long time I was too busy pursuing my art and my passions to spend too much time thinking about it and too poor to come home often. When the money was there I had slipped into my world of post-party, post-Anne work and the resulting success that took all my time.
Now as the jet was touching down in Cleveland I decided it was time to clear this little section of my life up. I realized talking to Ian that as much pain as his experience with his folks had caused, he didn't have this shrouding mystery in the way of somehow establishing the complete adult relationship I felt would be possible with them if they knew, and how really unfair I had been to them all these years. I am their only child; surely they have the right to know this fundamental truth about me.
I hadn't told Joel what I was up to, all he knew was that I couldn't get a flight into Cincinnati until this evening and was spending the day in Cleveland. So I had that guilt to deal with as well. Something deep inside me was still insecure about our relationship, perhaps it was still the age difference.
I wondered if that were the case, would it ever go away. I tried to analyze it; it wasn't that I didn't trust Joel, for the moment I did. It was more that I knew how much I had changed emotionally over the last 10 years. I was looking ahead of him and wondering if the same thing happened to him, will there still be a place for me? And if not, I'll be well into my 50's and potentially less capable of coping with betrayal and loss. It seemed to me he has so much ahead of him that I have already weathered, is the difference just too much.
I called my folks from the baggage claim area and they were pleasantly surprised and fortunately not tied up in anything. The cab ride out was like driving down memory lane. I tried thinking back and realized the last time I had been here was for Harold's funeral about 6 years ago. Mom and Dad had attended with me and I remember my Mom's arm sliding around my waist when the priest recited the internment prayers and the flash of the aspergillum in the weak sunlight. The house looked remarkably unchanged although it always seemed smaller than when I was a kid. I paid the man and walked up to the front door and opened it. The smell of the hall always made me feel at home. Dad was in the library I could smell his pipe smoke, and I went that way.
"Son," he said getting up and extending his hand which I shook. "Your mother told me you were flying through, literally. It's so good to see you." He said patting me on the shoulder.
I could sense the reserve, which had colored all of our conversations since the day I told him I didn't want to be a doctor. "Dad, I have been having flight problems all week and decided as I couldn't get to Cincinnati until this evening, I would come see you and Mom. Where is she?" I asked looking around.
"She went into town to pick up some groceries; you know how she likes to cook for you. She'll be home soon. Tell me, what you have been up to. Your commission in Kentucky and your invitation to show at the Victoria and Albert was reported in the Cleveland papers. How did you find Europe?" He said, as we sat across from each other in front of the empty hearth.
"Great, I really didn't get to see that much. I was too busy with the gallery and the museum. I did manage to see most of the available Sargents, guess I'm getting too old for a lot of site seeing. Dad I wanted to talk to you and Mom, it seems so long since we just talked." I said and then paused.
He looked at me over his glasses, and I could tell he was taking a read of me. "What's wrong, son, you should know you can talk to us about anything. You've grown up and moved away from us but you're still our little boy. Your mother and I are so proud of you. We never dreamed you'd be so successful." He sighed.
"Dad, are you proud of me? You're not disappointed I didn't go to Med school and get married and settle down in the practice with you? Not disappointed that I march to a much different drum than you do?" I asked and then went on. "Dad, I've reached a place in my life in which I want all the loose ends tied up neatly and a new chapter opened. Sometimes I feel guilty because I haven't lived up to your dreams for me." I said and looked at the man who I was told all my childhood I looked just like.
He raised his eyebrows in surprise, "Why Dave, we are very proud of you. How could we be disappointed? Do you think your Mother and I don't know how blessed we were to have a child like you? Sure it was tough when you told us you didn't want to study medicine, but Harold told us you would be wasted as a physician or a priest. He told us you were far more talented than he and that's why he begged us to send you to the Institute. Do you think I didn't worry everyday about how the other kids treated you, as I watched you turn inward? I remember how inadequate I felt when I didn't know how to reach you and I could see a wall being built between you and everyone else. The only thing that has disappointed us is the distance that has grown between us. For my part, I wish we could somehow be close again, I miss my little boy. Son, your mother and I are old, we won't be around long, and I would like to tie up those loose ends also." He sniffed and I realized he was very close to tears. I was totally unnerved.
I looked at my father and said, "Dad, I'm gay."
He smiled at me, then chuckled, "Finally, after all these years. Son I've guessed that since you were 17 years old. It used to bother me, and I asked Father Murphy about it. He told me that you had asked him about it also, and he told me what he had told you and advised me to leave it to God." He paused then said, "The dark secret." He sighed and then stood up and walked over to me. Then he did something he hadn't done in years, he bent down and hugged me. "Did you really think we would do anything more than continue to love you? I was so proud of you when you had your first show, then you just drifted away and it was so sad. I felt that somehow I had failed you. Forgive me for not being able to reach you." He said. I felt the tears on his cheeks.
I embraced him and said, "Dad, I'm the one that should be forgiven, for not trusting you. Until recently it had always seemed so important that I shield you both from a life that I felt you would disapprove of. I just didn't want to hurt you."
The flight to Cincinnati was uneventful and mercifully short. My folks had tried to drive me, but I had told them that it would be rush hour and I didn't want them fighting traffic. During the cab ride I thought about the conversation we had had. I realized something fundamental about my life up until this day. I had been on the run from many things. I ran from the fact that I was gay and the reaction of the kids in school and my folks, to California. I ran from the AIDs epidemic to Anne, and I ran from Anne to work and success. It seemed like until my admission to Dad, I had been running for most of my life. I felt suddenly very liberated and oddly at peace. Then suddenly I wondered if my relationship with Joel wasn't another attempt to run, this time from middle age. I thought about that all the way to Cincinnati.
I dialed Joel's number from the gate, "Hey lover, where are you?" I asked.
His voice was surrounded by the sounds of traffic, "I'm walking into the terminal at this very moment. I'll see you at baggage claim.' He said and hung up.
I walked to the claim area, there he was, standing with his hands in the back pockets of his jeans, a Black Harley T-shirt on, cowboy boots and a baseball cap. His eyes lighted up and he broke into a million dollar smile when he saw me. I walked over to him and I slid my arm around his shoulders and hugged him lightly. I could feel his hand slide around my waist and pull me against him. Then he said, "I've missed you. Wish I could give you a big old kiss, but we might get thrown out. It wouldn't be a very polite one, I'm afraid." He said and laughed.
"We'll be out of here soon. I've missed you too, Joel." I said as the red light went on the carousel and the bags started going around.
We pulled my bags off and went through to the parking lot. Joel brushed up against me at every stride we took, I was about to explode. We threw the bags into the truck and got in. We dove for each other and our lips met. "God, I've missed you." I sighed as my hands wandered across his shoulders and down his arms.
"Mmm, me too." He said. His hands were locked behind my neck and he was glued to me.
His taste and fragrance were as I remembered them and the tickle of his razor stubble was very erotic. "Let's find a room for the night; I can't wait until we get back to the farm." I said and stroked his inner thigh. I could feel his erect dick jerk as I lightly brushed it.
"I'm way ahead of you big guy." He said and tossed me a room key he pulled out of the pocket of his jeans. The old pickup roared to life and Joel drove out onto the expressway. "So, how was the day in Cleveland?" He asked as we merged onto the interstate.
"Great actually." My hand was nestled on the top of his thigh and I slowly started to stroke his hard tube of meat though the jeans.
Joel moaned, "Dave, I'm gonna shoot if you don't stop." He gasped and shifted gears.
I laughed and said, "How far is it to this hotel, anyway?"
We fell into the room of the Super 8, managing to make it to the bed. My bags were flung into a corner and we were tugging each others clothes off. Joel's arms encircled me and he buried his face in my neck and I could feel the urgency of his thrusts against my crotch. I reached between us and freed his rigid cock from his jeans. "Joel, you slut, going cammo." I said and sighed as I felt the slickness of his cock. I managed to push my own slacks and boxers down and he was pushing against my pucker. I could hear his ragged breathing and felt the pressure as he entered. I moaned as he pushed through and slowly filled me, his cock brushing my nut as he found his rhythm. His lips covered mine and his tongue pushed down my throat and I could feel the edge of my orgasm start. As the first shudder rocked me I wrapped my arms around his strong shoulders and pulled him in as close as I could. My cum slicked our abdomens down. Joel continued to pound into me at a quickening pace. His moans more frequent until he arched his back away from me and I watched as his eyes close and his mouth opened to elicit a deep moan, never more handsome and beautiful. I felt him, buried deep within me, start to jerk and throb and knew he was dumping his cream into me. He sighed and sank down beside me. I ran my fingers across his chest and touched his cheek.
"I knew there was a reason I missed you." I said and smiled at him.
He smiled a lazy smile and said, "I'll have to remind you again."
I awoke sometime later and saw Joel sitting in the armchair watching TV quietly. I reached out to him and he slid back into bed and I wrapped my arms around his chilled chest.
"You went to sleep and I didn't want to wake you up. I'm sorry, Dave, I could have waited, I guess you're exhausted from the flight." He said and smiled. "What did you do all day in Cleveland?" He asked.
"Maybe you could have waited, but I couldn't." I said and laughed then, "I went to see my folks; they live in the suburbs." I could see Joel's brow wrinkle and knew he was thinking about his own folks. I said, "I told them about us, Joel."
He looked at me and said grimly, "What'd they say?"
"We got a chance to work a lot of stuff out that had clouded our relationship for years. They had guessed I was gay long ago, but because of my emotional distance they were afraid to talk to me about it. I wasted a lot of years, Joel, years that we can never reclaim." I said and paused. Then I kissed him slowly and smiled, "They want to meet you and I want to take you to see them, lover boy. I hope you like chocolate pie; it's my Mom's specialty."
He laughed and said, "Sure, I'd like that." Then he frowned and said, "Dave, do you want me to tell my folks?"
"Joel, I haven't got anything to do with your telling them. I'm not into conditions and manipulation. I had too much of that with Anne. I love you here and now, just as we are. You tell your folks in your own time, in your own way." I said and kissed him lightly. I scrambled out of bed and rummaged through my carryon bag then tossed the brown paper wrapped package to him. "Hope you like it lover. Sorry it's not a BMW; maybe if you're a very good boy, Santa will bring you one for Christmas." I said and leered wickedly at him.
Joel turned pink and untied the string and opened the paper. He pulled the antique volume from the sleeve and looked up at me and smiled. "It's an anatomy book." He said.
"Not just any anatomy book, lover. His Majesty King George II owned that in 1750. Stubbs did the engravings. I thought it would make a great addition to your office someday." I said.
Joel was flipping through the pages looking at the engravings and reading snippets of the text. He looked at me then held out his hand. I took it and he pulled me down onto the bed again. "This is so cool; I've never owned anything like it before. I think it's time I remind you again why you missed me." He said.
"I thought you'd never ask", I said and kissed him slowly. Our tongues met and I sucked his lower lip into my mouth. I pushed him down on the bed and pinned him by straddling his waist. I started moving my lips down to his neck and then onto his wonderful chest. His hair always turned me on and I let it tickle my lips as I made my way from one nipple to the other. I let my hand trace the fur down his abdomen and then buried in his bush of pubic hair as his dick lengthened and I cupped his balls. Soon my lips were tracing his shaft and I sucked each nut into my mouth and let it roll around. I surrounded his helmet head and took him into my mouth to the root. My nose buried in his pubes, I could smell the fragrance left from our earlier encounter and it really turned me on.
Joel moaned and slowly rolled onto his stomach spreading his legs. I opened my mouth against his butt cheek and tasted his flesh and let the patch of blond hair at the top of his cheeks tickle my nose. Then I slid up his back and was laying on him kissing his ear and neck. "You are so hot; I can't get enough of you." I whispered into his ear then let my tongue touch him there. He moaned and pushed his butt back into me. My erect cock was wedged between his cheeks.
Joel reached out and handed me a bottle of lube and I let some trickle between us over my cock and down into his crack. I could feel the tension between our flesh be negated by the lube and my cock slid deeper into his crack. I kissed his shoulder and neck and ear letting my hand stray around his waist and touch his hard cock. I entered Joel slowly, letting him get use to my rod as it stretched him. He sighed and then moaned as I pushed deep into him. His ass felt like warm velvet against my raging hard on. I started slowly withdrawing and then pushing in. Joel was moaning and pushing back straining to take me deeper. I buried my nose in his hair and could smell his shampoo and the odor that was his signature. My mind reeled with the sensation of his warm chute stroking my dick and I started speeding up, reaching for the climax. Joel was moaning with each thrust and I reached around and pinched his nipple as my orgasm crested and I sighed into his ear. I rolled off Joel, when my breathing had returned to normal and he rolled onto his back. I once again took him into my mouth, he was dripping and the head had turned a purplish color with his excitement. My tongue traced the edge of his helmet and then I swallowed him up again, he moaned and then I felt his hands on my head as he slowly stroked in and out of my hungry mouth. His balls slapped my chin and my nose was buried in his fragrance. The first jerk of his orgasm shot his cum into my mouth.
We snuggled against each other, my cheek rested on his shoulder. His hand stroked my arm and back. `Are you ready to go to California with me, Joel? I love you and want to be with you the rest of my life." I said quietly. I looked at him and he was staring back at me in that, little boy solemn, way. "Does that scare you? You realize if it were possible, I would ask you to marry me." I said and sighed.
"I love you too, Dave. I know you think I'm still a kid but I love you more than anyone before. If it were possible, I'd say yes." He said and kissed me.
The drive out to California took 2 weeks. We stopped when the mood took us and I painted, while Joel read and worked on his on-line class. He had been accepted as a visiting student at UC-Davis and would be starting almost as soon as we arrived. Flash had joined us on the trip; Joel couldn't find a home for him. I suspected he hadn't really tried to hard, but I was by this time attached to the flopped eared rascal also.
We arrived late in the evening at the studio. I managed to find the keys and Joel parked the truck in the garage that I had always used as storage. I let us into the studio and I paused and looked around. Everything was as I left it, the tables clean and the easels empty. Joel looked around at the large open space
He whistled and said, "Jesus, Dave, you sure you want to give this place up?"
I chuckled and said, "It's too small for the commissions work, and besides you don't want to commute to Davis from here. The new place will be great in a few weeks you'll see."
We had stopped in Davis on the way into the city and met Dale and Clark. They were anxious for us to see the short list of properties. When I walked into the abandoned warehouse that had once housed produce, I knew it was the place. The open free span 30 feet tall would easily house the panels of the commission. There was enough floor space to accommodate the atelier and across the back we would partition it and make a large loft space for Joel and myself. The back graveled lot would be redone into an outdoor space for us. Until it could be completed we would lease a small apartment midway between the bay and Davis. I would have to continue in the old studio space until the new one was complete and Joel would need to commute to school. Dale had already contacted a construction company and architecture firm to redesign the space.
Within a couple years, we were settled into a new life. The Art Institute jumped at the chance to affiliate with my Atelier and the V&A had sent the specs for the show. The old studio was leased to a design firm that I was a senior partner in along with a couple of very bright young rising stars. Dale and Clark came around to my new focus quickly especially as Ian's predictions about my prices had proved correct. I contacted Ian not long after the founding of the Atelier and asked him to become my European agent. He readily agreed and my presence in Europe has increased substantially. And Joel, well he is studying fulltime in the Vet program. He is working in the equine section of the Vet hospital and is making quit a name for himself in those circles. When we designed the living space it included a large study for him and a large guest suite for company. Not long after we settled into it, I surprised my folks and flew them out for a week. The visit was wonderful, Joel and my father found lots in common, I guess there isn't that much difference between Med school and Vet school. My Mom took the kitchen out for a much needed test drive, as neither Joel nor myself are remotely like cooks. My fears for our relationship haven't become reality, will they? Who knows, but as middle age continues to mellow I find less to worry about and less reason to run.
Ciao Dante