Aquata Cove

By Andrew Bailey

Published on Feb 8, 2017

Gay

Aquata Cove Chapter 84: Abandon Naught

Merrick drifts himself through the water, fully equipped with his sharkteeth and shells, along with his harpoon mounted on his back. His tail waves up and down, just slowly moving himself in no direction in particular. He signals on instinct around him, though he could really care less if there was anything threatening in his vicinity.

His eyes look up, and see a large tube of moving water. A rushing current, giving an unknown predestined destination, strong and fast...

Merrick kicks his tail up, and forces his way straight into the current.

The sound of forlorn guitars ticks along the stage of the Dream Waltz, hitting a mid-day themed melody for several lines, before the sound of rapid drums pick up the beat in a faster pace. The stage is decorated in a post-apocalyptic backdrop with complementing props and items here and about. Two people, a man and a woman, both of them looking identical, twins even, dressed in punk-rock style apparel, adorned with bronze chains around their legs and across their torsos as they hold their respective mics. "~Giiiiiive meee a reason to stay'heeerrrre~" The male said as he starts them off, "~Cause Iiiiiiiiiiiii don't want to live in fear~" "~I can't stop the raaaa~iiiin~" The female sings taking a step forward, "~But I can stop the teeeee~aaaars ~Oh I can fight the fiiiirrrre ~But I can't fight the feee~aaar~" "~No mooooooorrrre~" The twins sing simultaneously, "~I just can't liiiiive(~No mooooorrreee~)here~" "~I can't take it ~Can't take it~" He sings. "~No mooooorrrrre~" She sings. "~What do we stand foooOOOOor~" The brother and sister sang at the same time again, "~When we all live in feeee~aaaar?~" The rock music rings in an short interlude as the siblings switch places on the stage. Meanwhile, Merrick flies through the current, giving no thought into where or when he's exactly going in this tunnel of invisibly forceful water. Images keep flashing in his head, for some odd reason. He can see Adam falling from the cliff from the siren's singing, and into the ocean, falling into and landing safely onto the boat, where the point of view shifted from a lying perspective, Adam holding Merrick in his arms, before they ended up in a room, Merrick secreting oil while Adam tries to bathe him. "~Giiiiive me a reason to beeeeelieve~" The sister continues, "~Cause you don't waaaaanna see meeeeee leave~" "~I can't stop the rain ~But I can stop the teeee~aaars~" The brother goes on, "~Oh, I can fight the fiiii~rrrre ~But I can't fight the feeeaaaar~" "~No mooooorrrre~!" "~I just can't live here no mooorreeee ~" "~I can't take it ~Can't take it~" "~No moooooorrre~" They sing simultaneously, "~What do we stand fooooOOOoor ~When we all ~Live in feeee~aaaar?~" Merrick allows the water to pull and launch him in so many different directions and places, closing his eyes as he phases through everything. More images swim through his head as he goes, his Mother burning the back of his neck with his mark, whirling in heat and weakness before curled up in a room of constant sunlight that burns his whole body, before getting up and running as he sees Adam's body jerk and thrash as lightning ravaged him in the inside. The view turns to show humans with huge weapons poised at him, right before a crack of a roar shot, and Adam flies through the air, getting hit with a tiny killer, landing and bleeding like a river on the grass. "~No mooooorrrre~!" The brother said, "~What do we stand fooOOoor... When we all live in,~" "~No moooorrrrrre~!" "~I just can't live here no mooorreeee ~" "~I can't take it ~Can't take it~" "~No moooooorrre ~What do we stand fooooOOOoor ~When we all ~Live in feeee~aaaar?~" The music calms down as the strings of the invisible guitar dwindles down to a finish, idly ending the song as the twins walk in a angst style. Merrick slows his swimming, finding himself exiting the current while he swims away, imagining when he and Adam had that petty fight on the cruise, or when the three monstrous Scyllas nearly made Merrick become a freak of the black sun. His last mental images is that of Adam sleeping in eternal slumber in a white gown with too many tubes into his body, neither alive or dead as well as one can tell, with a plastic dome over his mouth so he can breathe. Those human eyes would open, with nothing but emptiness to show for himself, blank and clueless, forever cursed with his sense of loss. "... No more..." Merrick muttered, "No more..." He swims forth further, unknown as to where he has gone in this vast ocean.

"So Adam. Says here you've had an episode last night." Yuri said as she looks at the chart, "`Patient exhibited extreme anxious behavior, heightened blood pressure, emotional distress.'" She looks at Adam now. His eyes are pink and swollen and his face is pale; he just seems to be giving off a very sad disposition.

"Mn..." Adam looks downward, at the magnet links. He had started to play with them an hour ago, but for some reason, he's lost interest in them totally.

"Adam, I am your doctor." She said as she walks to his side, and sits down, "If anything is wrong with you, I need to know upfront. Otherwise, I can't treat you." Adam sniffs as be wipes his eyes for a moment, "Now what aren't you telling me? What's gotten you so upset?"

"... I don't know..." Adam said lowly, "Dr Yuri, I have no idea why I feel like I keep bawling my eyes out... I just feel like I'm falling apart inside, and I don't know why... Gheh, even if I did, it's not like I'll ever remember, right?"

"I'm sorry, Adam..." Yuri said lowly. Adam huffs as he rubs his eyes again. "Look... Do you want me to get your therapist? She might help you through this, you know."
Adam paused, before he shook his head, "No... I don't want to try... Why bother if I'm not even going to remember her..."

"Adam, the emotional stress you're causing yourself is dangerous to your physical health. If things don't improve with it soon, it will have some unpleasant repercussions, you might even get worse than you are now."

"I don't care." Adam said thickly, "I don't want to forget anymore... I don't wanna forget anymore..."

"Don't do this, Adam." Yuri said as she shakes her head, "You're hurting my friend in more ways than one. Your vitals are already making me nervous."

"I don't even know what that means." Adam said with his voice weak and withered with saddened emotion. "And honestly... I don't really want to care... Can you please just make me sleep now?"

"Adam, I can't. Your body can't take another dose right now. Just relax and build the magnets, and everything will be fine."

"Aggghhhh..." Adam sighs as he lets his head rest to the side, "No thanks..."

Yuri frowns sadly before she glances out the window. `Of all times to run off, Merrick... Where the hell are you right now??'

Savarna swims through the sea, her eyes following a school of Halo Oarfish. They are thin, and rather short, about only 12 inches long, but they spiral and circle in large schools, and only come out during the morning light to feed. She laughs as she watches the beautiful coils and turns of the elongated fish. The Adra Noita smiles with glee as a stream of them flow right to her, and circled around her playfully in a brief ring around her before swimming away to the bigger stream. Everywhere she looked, there is a flash of bright light, a hint of rainbow in each one, reflecting the sun's light. She takes a breath, and blows out a breeze of ice crystals around, making the schools flurry in a different direction, before she blows at another section, and having them take another different route in the curling raids. They dip and fly all around, sometimes another rush of the smaller oarfish coming to circle her, and then leave just as quickly in their reflective river-like formations. Savarna twirls about, before she stops. She spotted something odd on the sandy bottom floor, among the rocks and several branches of coral. Out of curiosity, she swims downward, peering her eyes to try and make out the shape as she goes. Eventually, her eyes lay upon a blue and silver-white merman, lying upon one of the rocks as his fins roll and sway with the flows of the ocean. "Brother!" Savarna smiles and squeals with excitement as she jets towards him, "Brother! You are here! I did not see you! Hehehe!" The young mermaid darts to and around Merrick, putting her hands on him, "It has been several moons since we last spoke! What are you doing here??" She waited for a response. After several seconds, her blessed eyes can see very little movement inside Merrick's aura... If not none at all. "Brother, wake up!" She said with a playful tug to his sides, but getting no reaction from it. "Come with me! There are Halo Oarfish about!" She races upwards from him, and then looks back down. Merrick has not moved. "Brother?" She asked curiously, before swimming back down. She moved to in front of her sibling, and looked. His eyes are open, sure enough, looking rather tired. "Brother? Can you hear me?" She asked as she pushed him softly. She looks behind her, and tugs at him again, "Come, I want you to meet my friend, she is over there!" The Adra Noita turns again, taking Merrick's hand, and swims quickly, only to have Merrick's hand slip from hers. She turns again, seeing him fold his arm back in. "Brother?" She comes again, "Brother, why aren't you doing anything?" She sees a steady mist issuing from his eyes, as he stares at one spot. "Are you grieving? What has happened? Brother?" Looking into his eyes yields... Nothing. Umiato always says she can look into one's soul and taste their memories through a single glance into their eyes. Merrick shows nothing... "Brother." Merrick shifted, and puts his face into his arms, and then stops moving again, "Brother?" Savarna pushes him lightly, but has only gotten the same result he has been giving her. "Awh..." She looks sadly down, before sniffing, and turning around, determining that he no longer wants to see her, but would rather be alone.

Adam rubs his brow as he looks at his laptop, after having read the previous entry, which seems to be incomplete: --- Dear Diary, I don't really know what to put here. Someone gave this laptop to me, and I guess I'm supposed to put my thoughts and feelings into it. But I don't really know who it was who gave it to me. Well, I guess. I feel lonely, right now. Dr Yuri is out for the night, I think, I haven't seen her for a while. I kinda feel a little safer when she's around though. In general, I just don't feel right. I feel some kind of pain in my chest. I'm pretty sure I talked about it before. I feel like something is sinking down inside me. I really should tell Dr Yuri about it, but I don't want to make her worried if it's something she doesn't know how to fix. I don't think it's a medical problem. I guess I also feel empty. Dr Yuri always tells me when I've had a visitor, but she's the only person I can really remember. Actually, that's not true. I think I remember someone else. Someone with yellow hair, and blue eyes, and maybe they were red? I can't... Yeah, I can't remember. I also feel sad. I'm sad all the time. I know I can't remember just how long I've been in this hospital, but I feel like I'm sad almost all the time. I just can't feel happy, at all. I don't even know what happy is supposed to feel like, right? I just feel like... I don't want to be here. I don't know anyone, and I don't know anything, I just want to ---

Adam can't begin to imagine just what he was doing or thinking at the time, but according to a little note in the screen of his computer, he's supposed to write another entry. Adam sighs as he puts his hands forward again.

--- Dear Diary,

Here I am again. I'm supposed to write in you. The outside looks ok, I guess. A lot of clouds, like it's going to rain. I think my memory's getting better -- I think I can remember two women who came to see me a while ago. One of them had this strange accent and a brightly colored cloth around her head, and the other one was dark blonde, and I can only remember she had a blaring voice, and I feel a tinge of annoyance from having spoken to her. Was she really my friend? See? I think I can remember someone for a little while once they leave me, but I can already see the details slipping from me. I can't even remember if they have names. Anyway, Dr Yuri says my psychologist has estimated my memory problems to a point where I don't forget so quickly, but I still can't really remember anything about what happened yesterday, or the day before that, and so on. I still feel empty inside. I told Dr Yuri about this hole I have in my chest, and she said she's no expert in the matter -- supposedly, I'm physically doing fine. But I have this note from my psychologist that I still remember someone, in a way where I don't know them, but I miss them. Doesn't really make sense, but it's the only thing I got to really try and explain this feeling. I do feel like somebody needs to be with me, like I need someone with me right now, but I haven't felt anything to change this feeling, regardless of who might've visited me. I also keep having these headaches. I need Dr Yuri to give me more medicine, but she keeps saying my body needs to be paced, or else I'll suffer a relapse or an overdose, whatever that means. ---

"Uggh..." Adam groaned as he rubbed his forehead. Writing in this diary is more tiring that it should be, but it's SOME kind of a relief too. He just rolls his head, and continues to type.

--- You know how some people like to eat endlessly because they're depressed? Well, I'm kind of the exact opposite. I kinda just want to be empty for a while. Maybe if I throw up? I don't know, I don't think Dr Yuri would be happy with me if I did that. She'll just probably give me this sad look and shake her head again. I don't even want to play with my magnet things anymore. Who cares if I can remember how to put them together? There's something else bothering me, and I don't know what, and no body will tell me. Or if they do, I've probably just forgot. I can't stand this. I hate that I can't remember anything. ---

Adam stops. His hands go up to his face as he massages it for a few seconds. His stomach feels deep as it churns. He can hear the machine beep faster as his blood pressure rises from his anxiety. He closes his laptop, and puts it to the side.

Merrick feels hunger claw from the depths of his stomach, for some time now in fact. He can't remember the last time he's eaten, but it's like... He can't stand the very idea of food. Though this sharp, hollow pain stabs his guts almost constantly, Merrick cannot find the desire to eat. He swims aimlessly though the ocean. Over the past couple of days since he's left, he has not seen or encountered a single merfolk anywhere, or if he has, he has simply ignored them. As a Coshiton, he will never have the right to approach any pod for any reason at all - trade, refuge, guidance. So what would it matter? Triton Bertone and Noita Rayette, of the Amnien merfolk, still see and give affection to him, as does Triton Olaroc and Noita Shazde of the Holsiens acknowledge him. How has it come that merfolk, as a rule, have become so divided, that some can overlook and forgive a rogue when they see one, but merfolk, such as Triton Kaiken, simply sees a Coshiton as a disease on nautical civility. What would happen if he were to meet Triton Samudra, who once embodied the same narrow and discriminatory sentiment, until he too was cast out for breaking one of the Sacred Laws? Merrick breaks the surface of the water, seeing the dusk sky above him as he approaches a nearby rock. He grunts as he pulls himself out of the water, rushing from his glimmering tail and wavering membranes on either side. His webbed hands plant onto the large boulder and setting his weapon aside, before he lies himself down. His eyes look to the partial moon above, already present with the sun setting. Samudra openly admits that he too once believed that all Coshitons don't deserve the right to live, once having to commit their crimes. Their existences considered forfeit for what they've done, having to take away their connection to the pod, their weapon destroyed, and their own flesh burned and branded with a permanent mark that will never disappear is somehow generous to give to one brazen enough to commit an act of treason against their own kind. That was until it was revealed that half of the Sacred Laws that have been established rule out against things merfolk can't even control. Samudra never refused to choose a mate by his 51st red moon, his mate was never even present at the time. Even if Vanora happened to be there when Samudra fell in love with her BEFORE he was exiled, he would have been cast out anyway; He is an Armor Turtle, and she is a Lion Fish. Holsien and Piscien, two different species mating together is a violation of all three creeds of merfolk. Samudra never stood a chance against the Laws, his fate was already written a long time ago, as is with everyone's from the moment they're born, some theorize. Or it could be that Samudra could have never found Vanora, who knows? But Samudra could have had no one else. Either that is the Waves of Fate punishing him for his archaic narrow mind, or a script that just isn't in his favor. And so what about other open-minded merfolk? Could they not band together, with other Coshitons, what few there are, and show that they are not alone? Whether what they did was right or wrong, don't they all deserve mercy? A Triton can tell with a judge of character, right? A Noita can see them in earnest with just a glance, can they not? And yet they openly are obligated to reject any lone rogue that crosses their path. Or are the Ningyo just that ruthless? Are those ancient sentinels truly so blind to circumstance that they will slay any Coshiton brave enough to come back to their family, or to punish a pod who harbor an oceanic criminal?

Kevin walks out of the bathroom, letting out the steam from his shower as he rubs the towel into his hair. Just then, Syrinx walks in front of him, adjusting her armaments of shells and kelp again, "Hey babe... What're you wearing that for?"
"I'm going to the Kenovani." She said, "They need me."

Kevin glances at her shell fragment around her neck. "No they don't... Your thing isn't glowing." 
"Oh I..." She said as she looks at it, "It only activate once as a signal. I need to go to them right away."

"Wait, stop, stop right there." Kevin says as he strides around her, blocking her path, "Syrinx, why are you lying to me?" Syrinx looks up at her tall boyfriend's eyes.

"... He needs me right now, Kevin. I already asked Yuri if I can talk to him, but she said he's already gone off to the sea. I need to find him, before things get worse." She said as she walks around him

"Syrinx, wait, stop!" Kevin raised his voice, grabbing her by the arm.

"Kevin, let go of me, you're hurting my arm!"
"Babe, listen to me." Kevin then puts his hands on her shoulders, "This isn't your fight. I know how you feel, but this is something a man needs to figure out on his own."
"Kevin, you don't understand." She persisted, "When we ran into him, there was NOTHING in his eyes. We didn't even see him until he literally bumped into us. That isn't NORMAL, Kevin."

"Look, I care about Merrick just as much as you do, and I feel for Adam on a very close scale. I understand that you feel like there's something you need to do, but this isn't the type of thing you should get involved with."

"Yeah, like when I told you not to go to Merrick when we were on the cruise?"

"That was different; he was coming after you, and I didn't know how unstable he was back then."

"Kevin, I can't just stay here and let my friend turn into a killer." Syrinx protested, "Gelentea was practically my aunt, she and my Mother were so close to each other, and then one day, she just snapped and killed off her own members! What if Merrick goes to the Kenovani pod, and starts attacking THEM? Or worse, what if he goes to his own pod and starts to kill them? He has a Mother, a Father, a Sister, a little Brother on the way, and if he runs into them while he's-"

"Syrinx, I get it!" Kevin says, "But you can't just go off on your own and look for him. This is something he needs to figure out."

"Kevin would you LISTEN to me?!" Syrinx said, "I need to find him before he goes berserk!"

"And what will you do then?!" Kevin asked, "Say you find him, out in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean or somewhere, with his old pod, or the Kenovani, or somewhere else, what'd be your next move?"

"I'd... I..." Syrinx said, trying to find an answer, "I'd tell him-"

"What, that life is worth living?" Kevin finished, "That it's not the end of the world? That Adam is going to be ok, and they're still going to be together? Or that we still care about him, and so does his other friends, and that we're here for them? Or how the criminal-justice system that's already screwed up Adam's case will somehow work out? Or that you know exactly how he feels, even though you actually probably don't?" Syrinx gives him a hurt look.

"Babe, those are all things that he's already heard." Kevin continues, "He's already been informed that we're all here for him, and that Adam is getting the best treatment he can get, but that's not enough for him right now. Merrick needs time to be alone to try and sort out his feelings. And if you go to him right now." Kevin's eyes show a glimpse of emotion, "He might actually turn around and kill you." Syrinx gives a silent gasp.

"I love Merrick, he's like a cousin to me at this point, Syrinx, he's like family. But if what you say is true about him," Kevin eases his grip as he holds her arms, "What if he just snaps, just like that, and then I never see you again... I already have a hard enough time scaring myself out when you HAVE to go to the ocean for your health."

"Kevin..." She shakes her head, "I have to try..."

"It's not going to be anything he hasn't already heard... If anything, it's probably going to provoke him. What kind of consolations did your Mom's friend hear when she lost HER kid and her husband?"

"Kevin..."

"Besides, what is it that Merrick is? You told me he's like royalty, right? He has noble blood, a better sense of mind?"

"He's a Triton... He's..." She sighed in defeat, "Technically, he is superior in every aspect of the normal merman..."
~~~

Some time later, while swimming down in the middle of the vast, open the water, Merrick dips down into a dark trench, gazing his eyes down into the darkest pitch of the ocean that he can see. He closes his eyes as he feels the cold pressure push all around him.

He goes down, waving his tail up and down as he goes, slowly as everything increases around him. He hears a slight ringing inside his head, as well as some kind of harsh push from the inside of his skull. His fingers flinch as he pushes himself lower, and lower, his eyelids no longer filtering as much light as a second ago.

"Just like in Kingdom Hearts, yes?" Merrick muttered, "Falling... Falling... Into darkness..."

Umiato once told him that he must hold onto the light. The darkness will always be there, but the light will always balance the darkness.

`Mourn the losses, because they're many. But celebrate the victories, because they're few.' Some character once said in a human visual story.

They are two sides of the same coin, at least in a real sense. But with humans? It just seems to be too many flips with too many pieces of coin. Nothing is ever or will ever be simple with them. For every one good thing there is to be found, ten other bad things rise up to hurt what is left.

"MnnhhHHHhhh..." Merrick grunts as his whole body becomes cold as the pressure continues to squeeze him tighter. He opens his eyes, only to see complete black, before closing his eyes again.

How long will he get to be happy if he were to get over this patch? How long will he and Adam get to be married, before the Republicans, Conservatives, or whatever tries to rip them apart all over again. How long do they intend to impose and interfere with their lives? And those are just the ones who bend and push the redundant and invasive rules. How many cockroaches are there in the shadows who actually go out of their way to brutally attack people who are different, like Adam was.

Merrick grunts harshly as the pressure is now beginning to crush him. Still, he moves his tail to swim down.

Really, what's the point in looking to the light, when the darkness is always waiting to erode and infect anything that anyone has? This world will never know what mercy is supposed to be, both in the human and merfolk world. Merfolk survive the cruel challenges and dangers of the ocean in its many forms, while humans constantly battle each other for what's fair and what's theirs and what isn't theirs, and how their world is supposed to run, while destroying everything in the entire process and the ones who can actually change this world for the better are too busy not caring because it's more important their own city runs to their own design.

What's the point of two men getting married and having kids when the world just wants nothing more than to take everything they have?

Merrick's mind begins to slip, quaking as he loses the ability to move as easily as he was. He can't tell if his eyes are open or closed, everything in his vision is pitch black. He finds himself paralyzed with dark cold force all around him. Instead of swimming, he can actually feel himself sink into the night sky of the sea, into a universal death, lower and lower.

"I think... It is best... If I fade... Into darkness..." He whispers imagining himself falling aimlessly in the abyss...

As soon as he made this thought, he can feel a change coming from inside him. The extreme weight and pressure around his body lightens from inside as he feels himself in a bit of a slow flip. His gills waver as he takes a deep, icy breath, as it suddenly has become easier to breathe, and he hasn't even noticed...

And now, he can see lights. Arrays of lights all around him, like formations of stars moving about around him. "Huh?" He looks at his hand, and now sees his own body glowing, reflecting non-existent light, before his body illuminates his immediate surroundings.

"What is it?"

"A merfolk from above."

"One of the light? He looks like a Wave Streak."

"He shines like an Arctic Veil though."

"He does not belong here, why is he here? Is he lost?"

Merrick blinks as he sees more movements, until he makes out the shapes of other figures as the tiny lights grow brighter. He sees a mermaid with a completely transparent body, with bioluminescent specs and spots all over her body. Her head shows a willowing shock of tentacles with a light at each tip. Her eyes glow pure light, while her skeleton can be seen from the neck-down. Her eel-like tail wavers below her as she holds her flipper-like arms forward in front of Merrick.

The more he looks, the more night-sky looking merfolk he can see, all looking at him curiously as his own being glows brightly, all of them possessing eyes of complete glowing white.
"You are a long way from your realm, merman." The mermaid, "I am opening the water around you so you will not be crushed. My name is Noita Hime."

"And I am the Triton Lennon" Said another deep-sea merman, holding his trident. "And who are you, to have delve so far into the ocean's darkness? You should know a school of Nalcious Eels are about to hatch, along with all of their parents. We are in the midst of evacuating, no one should be here for at least several moons."

"I am Merrick, of the Navyn Tail merfolk." He answered, "Former Adra to Noita Umiato and Triton Kaiken."
"An Adra Triton then," Lennon said, "Former..."
"Yes, I am Coshiton." Merrick told them, "Your generosity is wasted on me."

"You are not one of malice, I can see," Hime said, "I see that you are lost, but nothing else."

"I wager you did not see that through my eyes..." Merrick said.

"Anyone can see the loss in your eyes." She said, "In so many more ways then one.

"I admit, I am very interested in you, Triton Merrick." Lennon said, "It has been far too long since we had a guest from the light." The transparent, luminous merfolk swim around as they find a trench mount to settle down.

"You must eat," The Adra Triton of this small bioluminescent pod said, offering Merrick a grotesque looking creature, "My Sister can sense you are without strength."

"I do not wish to eat." Merrick shook his head, "Give it to someone who else needs it."
"We have our policies, Coshiton Triton." Lennon insisted, "You must eat." Not feeling like putting up an argument, Merrick accepted the offering, "Will you tell us a story of you? We have a little time to spare for our guest before we must all leave."

"Do you really need to know?" Merrick asked after a few bites. "Or am I to be in debt for an implied meal?"

"Hah, there must be some reason you would brave such depths." Lennon said.

"Well..." Merrick looks downward, "I suppose... I wanted to die."

A murmur and a few gasps came from the pod, taken aback by his dark answer, "Triton Merrick, why do you chose to die?"

"I am not a Triton." Merrick said blankly, "You do not need to call me that."
"We believe in placing respect where it is due." Lennon said, "But why do you wish to perish?"

"Well... In a sense... Because my mate too, has also died. Killed by humans."

"I see..." Hime bows her head, "That would cause anyone to abandon faith."

"Alas, another reason why we will never belong upon the land."

"Actually, I live on the land." Merrick stated. The whole pod stares at him wildly, exclaiming with much confusion and astonishment.

"You live upon the land?! Amongst humans?!"

"Yes. It is not quite as horrifying as you think, but the humans have made chaos and warfare a vital part of their hierarchy. Really, it is not worth the trip, even if your kind could survive the shallow waters."

"For how long have you lived with the humans??" 
"What is it like??"

"I have lived there with my mate for several years. It is like..." Merrick pondered, "Living in a completely different world. Humans are far more advanced in so many things than we merfolk. They are very adaptive and inventive. They can do so much more than you could ever imagine..." He looks up to the dusk above, light unable to penetrate where he is.

"And yet, with every advance they make, where are just as many humans who fear change completely, and will fight with all their souls to stop or even reverse any kind of progress... In a way, one can describe humanity as an entirety as both primitive and advanced at the same time."

"They are truly such complex creatures?" Hime asked, completely fascinated.

"`Complex' is a very simple way to describe the whole of society." Merrick said, "They have thrived in warfare, hatred and pain. They seem to starve for calamity, nothing is ever as simple as black and white to them. My mate was killed by four savage humans, and instead of being punished, they are pardoned as if they were innocent."

"You... You are truthful?" Lennon said, "Such laws are allowed for them? How does it not drive you mad to live in a backwards way of life?"

"One thing to remember about humans," Merrick said, "Diversity is something both reviled and celebrated. If it were not for my mate, I would have left behind the land a long time ago... I would rather brave the volatility of the sea than endure the cruelty of the land."

"Please, if you would indulge us more," Lennon said, "The Nalcious Eels have a while yet to swarm. I would like to hear of your experiences more."

"... Fine." Merrick said, "It is the least I can do to pay for your hospitality."

Syrinx and Kevin sit at the couch in their home. Kevin is a little too nervous to go anywhere, in suspecting that she might sneak away from him despite their discussion. Syrinx is still so restless, wanting to find Merrick and... Try to figure out something to say to convince him to come back and hope. "Kevin... What if he never comes back? Adam will go on, and..." "Babe... I really want to say everything will be fine... But... Weeeellll." "Yeah. You can't." "Well, I personally think he does have a better chance on his own in the ocean than he does here on the land." He said, "Some things a man just has to work out for himself." "His disposition scares me though." Syrinx said, "There's so much I feel that he doesn't understand. Like... There has to be SOMETHING to say to make him feel better, but I can't think of what." "It's not for us to make him understand."
"But Kevin, he's our friend, a-" "And we're here for him, always." Kevin said, "You can't force help to people who don't want it, you're only making things complicated that way. If what all of us have said hasn't made him feel any better now, than he just needs to find the right answer that does." "I know..." "Merrick has made up his mind, and staying here is only going to make him crazy..." Kevin holds her closer, stroking her arm, "I'm worried sick too, babe... He'll be back though..." "Like I keep saying..." Syrinx said, "I don't think he will..."

Merrick finds himself back up at the surface, looking to the sky above with his body parallel to the wavering surface. He must've spent several hours down in the abyss, those deep merfolk could not stop asking him questions. It's only when they all heard a far-away screech when they suddenly had to rush away immediately. The Noita was kind enough to send Merrick back up to the waters of light without harm with her power -- evidently, when any creature goes from the far deep to the brim of the surface too fast, they have a very, VERY bad reaction.

Luckily, those merfolk are very accommodating. One of the friendliest pods he's ever met anyway, they didn't even flinch when he told them that he was a Coshiton mated to a human. One could describe them as odd, or the humans would describe them as liberal. Though, it doesn't really matter at this point.

He looks up to the sky above. It's pouring rain, so everything on the surface is distorting. Merrick has always loved a storm, as did Adam. Quietly exciting, and a chance to cuddle up, maybe get a little naughty...

If he were to go back now, would he have a chance to have that again? If Adam will never get his memories back, will he fall in love with Merrick again? How long would it take for them to get back together? And what about the wedding? Only a couple of people have asked about the wedding since this incident with Adam has happened.

"I suppose it's off then..." Can't have a wedding without rings, right? And good riddance. Even if Adam and Merrick would to be in love again, if Merrick would be the one to get down on one knee and offer Adam a ring made out of pure pearl, it would only be a matter of time before he gets pushed into despair, or if Adam were to get into an accident...

All of this happening over something that he can't control, and never will. Is it really so hard in this world to live as an innocent soul?

"So why then... Where is the sense in all this..." Merrick mumbled to himself, after much more time to think and wonder, "I fell in love with a man. A human man. Even if Adam was not to be my mate, I will always be a homosexual merman. I never chose this life, I will never have had a Noita. How many mermen or mermaids have gone through their lives, alone and envious of lovers, cursing this world..."

"Is it amusing then... O Bright and Shining Sea Mother?" Merrick said, "To allow the Waves of Fate to torment us always? Do you truly love us at all? Does the Radiant Land Father have no control over his own people?"

"And what is it do you think you are doing?"

"..." Merrick paused, still looking up at the mid-noon sky, "I am doing nothing as I shall be."

"You were not about to blaspheme the Sea Mother in MY presence. Not in YOUR lifetime."

"And if I was?"

"Do not take that attitude with me. And I am addressing you, you will face me now."

Merrick glares at the surface, letting himself drift down, before turning around. Kaiken looks up at him with his strong arms crossed, both mermen frown upon each other. "Come here." Kaiken told him. Merrick obeys casually as he swims to his father's side, Kaiken watching him as he comes, and then both of them turning to look at rare sight. A Colossus Octopus floats through the ocean, bigger than any human ship that has been built, swimming peacefully, its tentacles pushing and pulling through the sea as it makes its way to the open vastness.

"You have made your Sister sad." Kaiken said, "She said you had the eyes of the dead. You have frightened her." Merrick remains silent. "She still loves you, you know. And yet you cast her affections aside, and for what reason?" Still, nothing. After a pause, Kaiken continued, "You are all alone here. Your Mother told me of a pod of Coshitons that have taken you in. Why are not with them? You know you stand little chance when you isolate yourself."

"... My mate is gone." Merrick finally said, staring blankly into the ocean. Kaiken turns his head to his son, "He is as good as dead to me now. Slain, by other humans."

"Truly?" Kaiken asks.

"If you want the complete truth, no, my mate is not totally dead. But those humans destroyed every single memory he ever had. There is nothing left."

"There is never truly nothing, Merrick."

The two of them remained silent as they watch the giant octopus slowly disappear, "... You were right, Father." Merrick said, "You have always been right about the humans."

"Hm."

"They are all savages. Theirs is a world of war and devastation. They throw away their lives and their souls for the sake of what they perceive to be the most righteous path, and they kill each other all time for that very reason."

"You make them sound more sophisticated than I ever have."

"Make no mistake, Father." Merrick said drearily, "They are all creatures of hatred. Their only notion is the refinement of their chaos."

After another pause, Kaiken speaks again, "You know full well of my own views of the human world. And from what I can gather from your words, I am mostly correct." He turns again to him, "And yet, you are still alive and thriving. It has been so many moons since you bore that mark on your flesh, living upon the land for all of that time. And here you stand."

"... The grand scheme is what truly shows the madness of the land." Merrick says, "My mate is a man who is allured by other males, and not females. For that reason alone, despite that he is a pure-hearted soul, they preyed upon him, and they put him down. They beaten him mercilessly until he was on the brink of death, and they shattered his memories."

"So why are you here, Merrick?" Kaiken asked, "Have I not told you mercy is for the weak?"

"Heh... That is typical of you, Father." Merrick commented, "I hardly believe you and I share the same views for mercy and weakness."
"Ugghhhh, you are a very troubling child, do you know that?" Kaiken scowled as he bows his head and rubs his brow, "You are banished, and yet still in desperate need of my tutelage."

"And how does that matter to you? I no longer exist, remember?" Merrick told him, "I am your Son no more."

"That is not the concern here. I will not allow you to forget all that I have taught you." Kaiken answered. One more moment of silence, and Kaiken takes his trident from the mount of his back, "Come. We will spar." He pushes his mighty, firm tail up and down, and swim further away, before he looks back behind him, seeing Merrick has not moved. "I said `Come'."

"For what purpose?"

"We will spar. Like you and I used to when you were younger."

"Again, for what purpose?" Merrick asked, "I am not your child anymore. You broke that right of mine when you broke my trident."
"I will not tolerate a disrespectful argument," Kaiken said calmly, "Now come." Merrick merely glares at him, still frowning. Kaiken growled as he quickly whips around, and came face-to-face with Merrick in a second flat. "Come!" He commanded. Merrick gives him a resentful look, before swimming around the larger merman, and then downward where he started, before Kaiken follows suit.

The two of them face each other in the middle, between the ocean floor, and the surface above. Kaiken holds his trident at the ready, while Merrick holds his own spear.

It is as Daughter says...' Kaiken thinks as he looks into those dark, dulled blue eyes across him, His eyes hold no life...'

"Now." He said, before lunging forward. Merrick holds his harpoon to defend, catching the trident in one of its divides, before throwing it aside. Kaiken whips around quickly, and swipes at Merrick with the sharp, blade-like fin on his arm. Merrick swerves out of the way, and swings his weapon. Kaiken quickly flips, and knocks that harpoon from Merrick's hands with his tail!

"Do not insult me, Merrick." Kaiken scolded. Before it could drift down too far, Kaiken takes Merrick's spear up, and gives it back before assuming the attack pose. "Again." He makes the first move, driving the trident forward, but Merrick moves out of the way. Merrick grabs the end of the trident, and uses his father's strong swing to his advantage, allowing himself to be pulled up, before doing a full-turn swing, which is blocked above an angry face from the Triton.

"I said do not insult me." Kaiken moves and runs his trident along the harpoon, and then forces his hand onto Merrick's chest to push, and shoved him backward, "You were not nearly this slow when you were an Adra. Pick up your weapon, and fight." He said with that lethal sternness he's spoke with for so many years. Merrick begrudgingly takes his weapon back, and then moved into a quick whirl.

Kaiken uses the hook-like structure of the lower side of his trident prongs to yank here and there, either at Merrick's body to corrupt his balance and movements, or otherwise interfere with his weapon.

`He is still not cooperating. His soul is still gone.'

"Your Mother can only mend you to a vast extent." Kaiken said, "This is not so much as healing, as it is about reviving."

KNNNG!

"I am sure I have not the faintest idea what you are talking about." Merrick said after his downward swing was blocked.

"You need to remember what I taught you about `Mercy'." Kaiken whips his sharp and strong tail up, getting in a cut on Merrick's cheek.

"Mercy." Merrick snidely asks. "Tell me Father, of all the years you have displayed your wrath and formality, what would you even know about `Mercy'. Mercy is for the weak. And yet you never explained to me what that is supposed to mean."

"Hmph." Kaiken drives Merrick back.

`He is bitter, cynical. That is not enough.'

Kaiken and Merrick continued to fight. Kaiken is easily out-maneuvering Merrick, while Merrick is barely putting in enough effort to not get hit or his weapon taken. Kaiken keeps his cool, while carefully studying his son with every move, every word, every gesture.

"So this is what you have to show in all your years among the humans." Kaiken said, "You have run away, and cast aside your heart. It truly sickens me to see how far you are allowing yourself to fall."

"What I do with myself is none of your concern, Father."

"I have NEVER tolerated that sort of behavior in your youth, Son, and I am sure I will not tolerate it now." Kaiken swipes his sharp warm, and struck Merrick's arm. After a few minutes more of fighting, Kaiken can sense some sort of rise from his movements at Merrick.

"..." Kaiken and Merrick take a very short reprieve, before Kaiken gives a few casual swings and strikes with his trident. "Apathy. Do you know what that is, Son?"

"The inability to feel, or to care." Merrick answered.

"Correct." Kaiken puts in a harsh, swing, jerking Merrick's block down, before the weapons clash again, "Do you not realize, Son, that you are of this curse?" Kaiken asked with genuine concern, "That you have allowed apathy to consume you?"

"So what if I have?" Merrick asked darkly as he struck the trident shaft again and again.

"Apathy... I do not know how it applies to humans, but this emotion of neglect is a fatal illness to the soul for you and I." Merrick merely listens nonchalantly as they fight, "Apathy slowly whittles away your very heart, it dissolves your own spirit, and it takes away all feeling to the world. You cast aside your own being, and thus cast aside everything your fate is supposed to be.

"Hm..." Merrick doesn't say more than that, trying to stay focused in the sparring. They stop fighting for a moment, as Kaiken looks upon his son.

"Eventually, the emptiness in your heart turns you into a hollow husk, and you forsake not only yourself, but those around you."

"And then what happens?" Merrick asked, panting. He is getting rather annoyed with this whole pointless thing. Kaiken gives a proper lunge, and their weapons cross.

"When all that you have is lost and toiled away, your soul will either burn, or freeze. If you cannot accept yourself, you will simply die a soundless death, as your body too, would have given up." They then whip around each other in sudden array of swings and attacks. They hit each other's weapon hard, and stop there again.

"But when one refuses to forget and reflect the cruelty of their state, their spirit will become that of a demon, and seek to destroy what it can no longer have."
"Hhh..." Merrick gasps slightly.

{"When Gelentea lost her family," Syrinx said, "She just... Changed. She stopped bringing me treats, she stopped laughing with my Mother, she just... Shut down. A-And one day, she just... She just went on a rampage, and killed some of our members... The Triton, Noita, and the Razirah did not even have a chance to trial her before she needed to be ended... And even then, it was too late."}

Merrick's eyes cast downward, his weapon lowering a bit.

Is that sorrow?' Kaiken though, ... It is still not enough. He needs more...'

This time, Merrick's body whirls around, and throws Kaiken's trident out of the way, before that sharp metal point charges for him.

"And what is your point, Father??" Merrick asked, his hits and attacks growing slightly more deliberate, "You think you can tell me how and what I can and cannot feel?? You have no such idea of what I have been through since my exile!"

`I will need to provoke him. My anger is all he has left...' Kaiken narrows his eye

"Oh really? So that is how you come to this? This is the conclusion you have best determined to solve your suffering?"

"What do you know, Father?" Merrick hissed.

`Hatred... It is not what I would prefer, but it will have to do.'

"I know far more about you than you can imagine, Son." Kaiken stated, "You are Coshiton. You violate your existence more than you already have by coming to us. You left behind your mate to find the pod you no longer have." Kaiken's focus increases, having to raise his guard a lot more, now that Merrick is starting to get faster with his attacks, "And for what?" He asked with disdain, "A small token of love you could have just as easily attained from the humans? Has your mind strayed so far with the savages?"

"Rhhhhh..." Merrick growls as he leers with his father with searing scorn, "Just silence yourself, Father..." Merrick quakes as both anger at Kaiken, and himself start to burn inside him, "You will NEVER understand a single thing about me!!" Merrick dips, and then finally strikes a cut across Kaiken's scarred abs.

"Oh really, Son??" Kaiken delivers a few quick hits, and then a brutal swing that gave a crushing shockwave into Merrick's arms.

"Ah-haahh..." Merrick grunts in pain, before he felt the top of the trident push his chin to face the merman.

"And how long do you intend to live your life in pitiful neglect? You chose to abandon the pod when your sins were finally brought to life. You left behind the sea for a sacrilegious life among the humans."

Kaiken's deep voice rises in anger, "And THIS is all you have to show for it?! Your mate shatters away, and so you once again turn your back on what you were given! How long to you plan on turning yourself into an ingrate?! You have already sullied your honor as a Triton, and now you will refute your own soul?! How is it that you have allowed yourself to fail me and my teachings??"

"Just STOP!" Merrick takes a vicious swing. "Rrraaahhhh!" Merrick's attacks with more speed and purpose, actually trying to hurt his father, coming at him seriously as these accusations stand both right and wrong at the same time.

`At last...'

"You understand NOTHING! FATHER!!!" Merrick strikes with voracity, whirling around and matching his arm swipes and tail-lashes with Kaiken's. "I have faced the humans' blatant hatred! I have watched monsters force my mate ingest lightning itself! I have seen half of their world hate what I am and who I love simply for living! I have fought far longer than you EVER will, Father! What right do you have to dictate on why I should allow myself to disappear?!"

"As I keep telling you," Kaiken said, easily matching Merrick's speed and reflexes, blocking every attack and taking his own hits towards him, "Mercy is for the weak! You do NOT have the right to disappear!"

"Damn yoouuuu! AAAHHH!" Merrick forcefully lashes the trident to the side, panting, glaring up at his parent. "Hhh... Hhh... Hhh... You are ignorant, Father..." Merrick's gills flare as he looks at Kaiken with more rage and frustration he's ever felt. Kaiken looks at him simply, seeing a spec of light or two from a white mist from Merrick's eyes.

"Are you angry?" Kaiken asked casually, hoping to confirm his success in stirring some sort of remnant in his son, "Do you hate me?"

"Not more than yours have been allowed to blind." Merrick then lunges his harpoon forward. Kaiken grabs the weapon, and forces Merrick's arm to twist and hit his back as he whips about.

"Agghh!" Merrick irks in pain.

"As I have said. Mercy is for the weak."

"Ghah! Hah... Nhhh..." Merrick grits is teeth as he tries to jerk away.

"I have seen apathy purge the souls of a several good merfolk. Noble, earnest, and trustworthy, two of them I have known for many years. And I will not allow a spawn of mine to fall prey to that void. Not you. Not a Triton. Coshiton or not."

"Gh... Ghehuh..." Merrick grunts as his eyes feel weaker from being powerless in his father's grasp.

"Us Tritons can always feel the weight and embrace of the heart. Our emotions run stronger than that of any merfolk. I can see now I have failed to fortify your to the cruelty of this life." Kaiken said as he felt his son struggle, looking at the heart-shaped tribal symbol branded onto the back of his neck.

"Khh... Nnnhh..." Merrick clenches his eyes as images surface again in his mind; Adam getting down on one knee, and holding a small box with a diamond ring, before he lay there, his face and arms butchered in a hospital bed, looking so close to the end.

"I just want to forget!" Merrick finally said, "Why will no one allow me to just do this?! I do not want these memories anymore! Why should I not just disappear?? Who would miss me, truly??"

"No, my Son." Kaiken said, "You may never forget."
"Ghhh..." Merrick tries to suppress his crying.

"Have I not taught you this very lesson, Son?" Kaiken asked with exasperation, "Mercy is for the weak."

"Rhhh!" Merrick yanks his arm away, and swings his harpoon at the Triton, who blocks the swing immediately, "What are you talking about?!"

Kaiken frowns upon him, floating there above the other, "We Tritons are the forces of austerity and fortitude, while the Noitas are the voices of reason and clarity. We are an eon of kings and warriors long since lost, as the Noitas are an eon of queens and priests who have long since prayed. As Tritons and Noitas, we have the responsibility of holding those above ourselves, always."
"And what does that have to do with mercy and weakness?" Merrick asked scornfully.

"Somewhere down the line, you have forgotten what you were born for. As a Triton, you must keep yourself strong. Mercy is for those who cannot be strong any longer, at any moment. For those who need our strength to hold, for those who cannot go on, we must be there to protect them, to guide them. To run away as you are now, to beg me to allow you to destroy your own memories by giving to apathy is nothing short of taking your own life."

"Do you know what I would do if I discovered anyone has ever harmed your Mother?" Kaiken asked lowly as he came to him. "I would not even allow them the pleasure of regret. And how does my Son respond when someone has attacked his mate?"

Merrick puts his free hand onto his eyes, flowing the sparkling mist from his eyes as he tries to contain himself for a short moment. Kaiken swims to Merrick, and puts his strong hand on Merrick's shell-clad shoulder.

"Not once, since the sun you were born, did I ever think you were weak, Merrick." Merrick huffs as he looks his eyes up to him, "Even when you were banished as a Coshiton, you matched my eyes as I destroyed your trident, you did not even blink. You may not receive mercy, because you are one who must give such to the ones who look to you." Merrick's hand grips his harpoon, "You have always had my anger, Son. Even that is one of your most reliable strengths." 
Merrick puts his hand on Kaiken's, and pushed it off, "I do not want your anger." He said with a mixture of grudge and disgust. "All it has ever done was turn me into a ruthless monster."

"Son." Kaiken continues, "In one time, or another, every creature that bears life in this world is a monster. There are no exceptions."

"... Truly..." Merrick said, his body shaking, "Mercy is for the weak..." He grits his teeth.

"Yes."

What...' Kaiken thought, His body is quaking.'

Merrick's throat rattles as he grips his weapon very tight, before his eyes and his arms move up in a rage, "REALLY?! Is THAT what you say, FATHER?!"

"Hhh!" Kaiken quickly blocks Merrick's sudden swing, before the harpoon moves around, and scratches at him.

"For the last time, what do you know about ANYTHING, FATHER?!" Merrick attacked 10 times faster and deliberately than before. 
"Enngh! Hah, wh-!" Kaiken whips his body around, but Merrick has gone into a full-berserk assault!

"And what about Arnaav?! Was he not good enough for your mercy?!" Merrick shouted as all of his wrath and violence pushed itself in one surge. "All of your preaching contradicts everything about you, FATHER!"

"What are you speaking of?! Control yourself!" Kaiken can barely keep up with him at this rate.

"The otter Coshiton from years ago! A rogue meryin that dared to beg you to help him!" Merrick ranted as he fought harder and harder, clanking the weapons very harshly, "And what did you do?! YOU ROARED AT HIM TO VANISH!"

What has happened??' Kaiken thought desperately, unable to find any opening to counter at all, Is his soul burning already???'

"He was a baby! He needed you! He needed us! He would have perished! What gives you the right to tell me of mercy?!" Merrick shouted, having nothing but white-hot rage for his father right now, "Where was your compassion back then?! Where was this profound wisdom when you sentenced an innocent lost soul to die?! You know the humans have a name for those like you!" Merrick said as he brings his weapon in for another mighty swing, "HYPOCRITE!"

It's all Kaiken can do to keep from getting it or losing his weapon. Merrick's eyes is showing him a hatred he's never seen before. Merrick attacks Kaiken's trident left and right, before he does a lightning-fast whip of his tail, and-
-KNNNG-

Kaiken's trident is knocked clean off of his hands. The Triton looks to his weapon floating away, before he glances back, and Merrick points his harpoon blade directly an inch to his throat. "How can you just be here and purport to teach of something you have never understood??"

Kaiken looks at his seething son for several minutes, before finally saying something, "You realize that you have successfully disarmed me, Son."

Merrick blinked, before looking at both of Kaiken's thick, muscles arms, and hands, either one idle at his sides. He then notices a Great White Shark circling then, with the large, heavy trident in its jaws. Kaiken gives another signal, bidding the shark to come to him, "Back in the days of Atlantis," Kaiken said as he takes his trident back, "When two warriors duel over matters of personal opinion, the one with the true resolve is the one who wins the fight." His sharp eyes look upon Merrick. Merrick sighs as he bows and shakes his head.

"Age does not exclude learning, Son. Even I have more to learn than one would think." Kaiken admitted. "You are young, and you have chosen the wrong answer for a challenge that tests your heart. You are still able to learn, it will never be too late."

"And why is that? Why should I even bother...?"

"Would I waste my time on you if were for naught?"

All of a sudden, the shell slice tied around Merrick's left wrist begins to glow and vibrate madly, "What?" Immediately after, the shell on Kaiken's headpiece starts to blur and light up as well.

Next: Chapter 85


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