Angst

By Jo Jo

Published on Oct 7, 2005

Gay

Boy meets boy. Boy gets into fights with boy. Boy and boy get together. Boy and boy break up. Boy and boy get together again. Boy loses all memory of other boy. Boy finally realizes he's in love with other boy again, only to not be able to have him.

Boy kisses another guy!

I couldn't stop thinking about what had happened the previous week between Gino's friend Sam and I.

And not only that, I couldn't stop feeling confused with life in general.

It had been exactly one week since the dance, and since that night, a lot of things had changed, for better or worse. For starters, Adam and Vanessa were no longer together. Or at least they hadn't been for all of about three days before Adam decided to get back with her. It was weird because I had been getting the vibe that Adam and I were getting closer.

But apparently not.

Things had gone on pretty much the same between us. Only, Adam seemed a lot more distant with me and was almost always all over Vanessa. I guess maybe he felt as though he had to be nice to me considering we were living together. Or at least, that was how I felt. I really had no idea what Adam's problem was.

Gino and Sam had broken up. Just like that and I hadn't seen much of the guy since last week. And what was more, Gino didn't seem to me like he was all that beat up about it. Maybe he was just putting up a front. After all, I already knew that if there was something about him he didn't want other people to know about, no one would know unless he himself told them about it.

I was just trying to figure out where all of this left me. Everyone seemed to have something going on, myself included. But most of it seemed to revolve around me and I found that to be a lot more frustrating than not having all of my memory back.

There was all of that, and then there was all this talk about the mysterious new kid, that had everyone in the school talking.

"Damn this new guy!" Alex spoke, as he approached our group.

"Whoa, Alex, what happened?" I asked.

"The guy stole one of my skirts away from me," Alex replied. "You know what I had to do to convince her to go out with me?"

"How do you know it was him?" I asked.

Alex shrugged.

"Well it hasn't happened yet," Alex replied. "But it's going to, trust me."

"I think the new guy's pretty hot," Michelle quipped.

"What happened to Caleb?" Krystal asked.

"Please, I needed a date to the dance, he was it," Michelle replied. "But the new guy is completely yummy."

"What's his name?" I asked.

Michelle shrugged.

"No clue," she replied.

"Well what does he look like?" I asked.

I looked over at everyone else who looked just as clueless as she did.

"Have any of you actually met the guy?" I asked.

No one said anything but I could tell they hadn't.

Which seemed to be the common tread around school the past two days. Apparently this new guy had done a lot of things.

He'd saved the president from having to face a global crises. He'd helped save a trapped family of seven from a sinking car. He'd taught Michael Jackson how to sound believable in court. Lots of things.

Yet, nobody had met him. Which was leading me to believe that maybe there wasn't a new kid in town after all. With so many kids at our school focusing on one guy in particular, the more I thought about it, the more it made sense that this guy probably just didn't exist.

"Have you guys ever stopped to think that maybe there isn't a new guy?" I asked.

"Oh there's a new guy alright," Michelle replied. "I saw the back of his head, which is why I know he's yummy."

The whole thing sounded kinda ridiculous to me. I seemed to be the only one not caught up in the 'new kid fever'

"Well whatever, I gotta get to class," I spoke, shutting my locker.

Didn't seem like anyone had heard me though. They were all probably thinking about the so called new kid.


I'd dreaded going to Government the past two weeks, because all we'd done was work on our partner projects, which were due at the end of the week.

I had originally hoped that this thing was going to be an outside of school project, that way Chris and I could split up the work and just avoid each other.

But the whole thing had been completely in class, and it just made it that much harder to ignore Chris, no matter how many times he tried to apologize to me.

And I had a feeling that today wouldn't be any different.

Chris and I had been working together in silence for five minutes before he started up with his usual swan song.

Or at least what I thought would be his usual swan song.

"So, have you heard about this new kid?" he asked.

Since he wasn't talking abut the two of us, I figured that it was a subject I could actually talk to him about.

"Have you seen him?" I asked.

"No," he replied. "And I'm starting to think he doesn't exist."

"So am I," I replied.

In my anger at Chris, I'd almost forgotten how alike the two of us thought sometimes.

He flashed me a small smile which I returned.

"So...how are things with you and your friends?" he started.

I noticed the way he'd said it. Like he was no longer including himself in the category. It was funny how much I'd wanted him out of the same category, yet now that he himself was admitting he wasn't a part of it, I almost felt guilty. Sad even.

"Weird," I replied.

I felt like putting it that way didn't include or exclude him either way and didn't feel guilty about it.

"It's kinda like that with everyone's lives," Chris replied. "It's been one fucked up year."

That, I could agree with.

"Yeah well, there's still a few months left," I replied. "Maybe things will turn around."

About two minutes later, Mr. Martin interrupted the class by telling us all to look up at him, as he had an announcement to make.

When I did look up, I noticed a guy I'd never seen before standing near him. With so many people in the school, I saw someone new everyday. I just figured today was no different and that some kid was being transferred into this period.

Although, there was certainly something about this particular guy that made me think that there was more to him than what met the eye.

For starters, there was the way he was dressed. A nice polo shirt with dark slacks and shoes. From what I could see, he also had on an expensive watch and sunglasses atop his head.

The guy just oozed wealth. And if that wasn't the case, he certainly looked the part.

And speaking of looks, he looked like he'd come straight out of an Abercrombie magazine with his dirty blonde hair which he'd made to look like it was 'naturally' messy, perfectly tanned skin, obvious well toned body. Perfect, basically.

"Everyone, this is Justin Newhouse. He just moved here from..." Mr. Martin squinted as he looked down at the paper with Justin's information on it.

"Don't worry about it. I've been everywhere," Justin spoke, walking towards the spread out seats in the class taking a seat in an empty one.

"Well, I guess you need a group to join then," Mr. Martin spoke.

I watched as Justin looked around before finally resting his eyes on Chris and I.

"Found one," he spoke, moving his desk towards us.

It finally occurred to me that this Justin guy had to be the new kid everyone had been talking about, especially since every girl in class was drooling over him at the present time.

So he existed after all.

"Uh...hi," I found myself saying. "Um, I'm Brandon and this is Chris."

Justin sat back in his desk and stared at Chris and I without saying a word. He continued to do so and eventually I looked over at Chris who just shrugged.

It was weird having the hottest new commodity in the school just staring at Chris and I as we tried to work.

It was like he was putting a block on my thoughts and all I could think about was him just being there staring at me.

"Uh you said you've been all over?" I asked, trying to cut through the unbearable tension.

For a second, it didn't look like Justin was going to comment. But then he chuckled like something was funny and moved closer to Chris and I.

"Yeah, well when your dad's in the Army....." he spoke.

Well, that right there told me he wasn't rich. Unless his mother did something important.

"How long have you been in Texas?" I asked.

"Too long," Justin replied. "Which translates to two weeks."

Chris and I exchanged looks. The guy certainly was an interesting little bastard.

"So are you the guy everyone thinks convinced Destiny's Child to get back together?" I asked, thinking of one of the rumors I'd heard about the guy.

"Well it wasn't really all that hard," Justin replied. "I mean, I don't like to brag..."

Lying fuck. How in the world would us normal Angst students come up with such outlandish rumors unless he started them himself?

Chris grinned at me as we went back to our work. I already didn't like this guy and I'd just met him!


As the day progressed, it became easy to see to anyone with eyes and ears that this Justin guy was all about putting on a show. All of the rumors concerning him were meticulously crafted to where it was next to impossible to check to see if they were true or not. I mean, I really didn't think anyone at the Angst knew Shaq or Brad Pitt.

And while I hadn't really seen Justin since first period, the buzz on the guy had only grown since then and I was only starting to get frustrated with the whole thing.

"I'm gonna ask him out," Michelle spoke, moving her tray of food away from her.

"I thought you didn't ask people out?" Krystal spoke.

"Have you seen how hot this guy is? Besides, he's almost like a celebrity and I'd so ask a celebrity out."

Leave it to Michelle to keep this guy on everyone's minds.

"Oh my gosh look, there he is!" Michelle exclaimed, pointing to Justin, who just as I thought he'd be, was surrounded by a bunch of people.

"Is this guy for real?" Gino spoke, sitting back in his chair.

"It's one big sideshow," I replied. "And Justin's the freak."

"Justin? His name's Justin?" Michelle asked.

"Yeah," I replied, frowning.

"Wait a minute...how do you know that?" Michelle asked.

"He's in my first period," I replied.

Michelle, who'd been turned sideways in her chair to watch Justin, turned back to me quickly.

"You know what this means don't you?" she asked, grinning at me.

I got a good look at the look on her face.

"Look, I'm not about to play matchmaker or anything like that-"

"Brandon come on! Don't you believe in true love?"

For her, not really. For me....I was starting to doubt it really existed.

"Save yourself the trouble and just stay way from him," I replied.

Michelle crossed her arms and rolled her tongue around on the inside of her cheek.

"Are you...jealous, Brandon?"

This seemed like a question that everyone wanted to know the answer to as they all had their eyes on me, waiting for my answer.

I turned and looked over at Justin, who was surrounded by so many people that he hadn't even had a chance to sit down yet.

"Yeah, I don't think so," I replied.

Michelle snorted as everyone else looked over in his direction.

I had so many other things to think about. More important things. Like how I was gonna deal with Gino and what I was gonna tell him about Sam, if I decided to tell him at all. The same went for Adam.

Yet, I was thinking about this damn liar the entire school seemed to be so captivated with.

I found it so amazing how he was able to have everyone wrapped around his finger in one way or another. I just hoped that I wouldn't be roped in this whole show right along with everyone else.


"That's who you're gonna write about," Stephen spoke, getting up from his computer and walking over towards the bulletin board.

I followed him.

"What?"

"Yeah," he continued, turning around. "Justin Newhouse."

"What!" I spoke, shocked.

Stephen smiled and walked over to the printer.

"You have to admit, the buzz surrounding this guy is unbelievable!"

"Yeah but-"

"He's the perfect person to write about. Especially considering how captivated everyone seems to be over him."

"Stephen, how is writing about some new guy newspaper worthy?" I asked, still not getting the situation here.

"Think about it. Everyone loves this guy and the stories he tells them right?" Stephen asked.

For how long though? I was almost certain the reason everyone loved him because he was new and they'd never met a pathological liar like him before. I was keen on spotting trouble because I'd been through the same thing before. Only this guy had the whole school eating out the palm of his hand, not just my friends.

"I mean, personally, I could care less about him," Stephen continued. "But everyone else would definitely pick up this months paper if he's the cover story."

The way he explained it, it made complete sense, considering this guy seemed to be all anyone could talk about.

But I didn't wanna write about him!

"Cant you get someone else?" I asked, walking over to my own computer.

"I'd love to do you favors, especially since you helped me out with Jade," Stephen replied. "But the truth is, I've been doing you favors from day one. We don't just write because we love it. These articles also count as part of our final grade in the class and you haven't turned in one in three months!"

"I know, and I'm thankful you've been covering for me but-"

"No buts man," Stephen cut me off. "I'm sorry but you're gonna have to write about Justin whether you like or not. A time's already been set up."

Stephen thumbed through his papers.

"What time?" I asked.

"Today after school," He replied.

"Today!"

It was was too soon. I at least wanted to get to know him a little better, seeing as how he was one third of my project grade in Government.

Well, no I didn't.

"Alright, fine," I sighed, facing defeat.

At least I could get this all over with and be done with the guy by the end of the week, which was when I was sure that all this hype was going to die down.

It had to. Because I didn't know how much longer I could take the insanity! ***********************************************************************

"Please!" Michelle begged still.

I was half tempted to make her get on her knees and beg. But this guy just wasn't worth it to me.

"Look, I just don't want you around while I'm interviewing him," I replied, opening my locker.

"I still can't believe you got roped into this whole thing," Gino spoke, arms crossed.

"Yeah well, it's not like I have a choice," I replied. "Stephen's right, he has been covering my ass."

Which I was completely thankful for. I just wished interviewing Justin wasn't what I had to do to pay him back.

I had been thinking about this dreaded interview all day and now that it was actually time to go and have it, I was actually starting to have nervous feelings.

Not because of Justin himself, but because of what interviewing him meant. I was slightly afraid that if I spent too much time with him, it would be just enough for him to convert me into one of his fans.

"Don't look directly into his eyes," Ryan said. "I hear he turns people into mindless drones with a look."

"So if he looked at you, you'd go completely brain dead then, right?" Michelle teased.

I sighed and leaned against my locker. I really didn't wanna do this.

"Hey if you want we can stick around," Alex suggested. "I mean if you don't feel comfortable with-"

"No, I don't know how long this thing is gonna take," I replied. "I'll call you when I get done."

Alex flashed me a look of sympathy.

"Well okay then," he replied. "You guys ready?"

"Yeah, I have to work," Jade replied, smiling.

"You still work?" Michelle asked.

"Absolutely Michelle. Because unlike you, she realizes that closets aren't just for making out in," Krystal spoke, wrapping her arm with Michelle's and leading her down the hallway.

"I'll tell your mom about you staying after school," Adam said flatly.

I hated the way he talked to me now. So obligatory. It was so annoying and I just wish I knew what the problem was.

Maybe he knew that I kissed Sam. Maybe Sam told him or something. Or what if he told Gino, and then he told Adam.

No. Gino wasn't that spiteful. Besides, he said he was over me and I believed him. I had to.

Adam didn't really even look at me as he wrapped his arm around Vanessa's shoulder and began walking away with her alongside Alex and Ryan, leaving me alone with Gino.

"Just be careful okay?" Gino spoke.

"I'll try," I replied, watching him as he walked off.

Now. It was time to go pretend like I gave a damn about anything this Justin guy had to say.


The interview had been arranged to start at 4. Yet here it was almost 4:30. Hand me my gun now!

The only reason I waited any more than five minutes was because I did not want to have to go through the same thing tomorrow or another day. I wanted to get this over and done today.

I had decided that I wanted to go at least find out what was going on before I heard what sounded like a group of people coming down the hall. While none of them were all that loud, the voice that clearly stuck out was that of Justin Newhouse.

"And that's how I managed to get the whale to spit me out," Justin spoke.

He'd walked into the room, with his body poking out of the door to continue talking to his entourage.

"Well, I have an interview to do right now but I'll have plenty of good stories to tell you all tomorrow, so sayonada!"

When Justin turned around and shut the door, he leaned against it, looking thoroughly worn out.

"I thought I'd never get rid of em," he said, heading towards me.

"That must be why you're half an hour late," I said, making no attempts to hide the anger in my voice.

Justin flashed me a half grin.

"What can I say...I'm well liked," he replied, taking a seat in the chair in front of me.

I was finding it hard to believe that a guy as gorgeous as him would be so repulsive to me.

"Alright, look let's just get this over-with," I started, reaching for my tablet of pre-written questions.

"Brandon, right?" Justin asked.

"Yeah," I replied, without looking up at him.

"Yeah, I heard about you," Justin replied. "You're the kid that psycho on the news kidnapped and tried to kill right?"

I so did not wanna talk about that right now, especially since with each passing day I was coming closer and closer to remembering exactly what had happened that night.

"Okay, so question number one," I started, choosing to ignore Justin's comment.

Justin smirked and sat back in his chair.

"What kind of a person were you at your old schools? I mean were you athletic? A social butterfly?"

I already knew the answer to that. He was a lying pain in the ass!

"Well I like to think of myself as a silent observer," Justin replied. "Sure I'll tell people things about myself but I won't make any real connections until I figure everyone out. Kinda like a detective."

Boy if you don't take your Sherlock Holmes wannabe self.......

But I was curious to find out what he thought of me so far.

"So what do you have me figured out as?" I asked. "Off the record of course."

Justin eyed me for a fairly long amount of time before responding.

"Well it seems to me like you have a bit of history with that Chris guy from first period," he started.

He must have sensed something from my facial response because he continued.

"I mean, it's obviously something that's impacted the way you are with people now," Justin replied. "Between John and Chris, I'm not sure you're all that trusting of people. Am I right?"

Well.....yeah. But I'll be damned if I was about to admit it to this joker.

"Okay, forget I asked you that," I replied. "Let's move on."

Justin flashed me a slight smirk before sitting back in his chair.


Adam reached behind Vanessa's back and tried to undue her bra but was finding it difficult to do, so he rested his hands for a moment as he continued to kiss her.

Vanessa was on top of Adam kissing him, hair blocking the clock next to the bed in his room. When she reached over to start kissing Adam's neck, he opened his eyes and looked over at the clock, his mind beginning to wander.

It was nearly six and Brandon still wasn't home. He should have been home.

But he couldn't focus on that. He realized that he shouldn't have been focusing on that as he was here with his girlfriend, making out. Besides, Brandon was happy kissing Gino's friend anyway.

And even as Vanessa started going even lower on Adam's body, he still found that he couldn't stop thinking about Brandon and sat up.

Vanessa sighed with annoyance and sat up as well.

"What now?" she asked.

"He should have been back right?"

Vanessa chuckled to herself.

"Please tell me you weren't thinking about your ex boyfriend while making out with me?"

Adam looked away from Vanessa.

"I'm just concerned. I mean, I feel a little responsible for him now that I'm living here," Adam replied.

"Yeah well Brandon's a big boy, I'm sure he's fine," Vanessa replied, moving back towards Adam to kiss him.

Adam looked over at the clock again, before getting up and zipping his pants back up and reaching for his shirt.

"I should call him," he said, after he had his shirt back on.

Vanessa sighed angrily and reached for her own shirt.

"No, you shouldn't," she replied. "God, Adam, you swore to me that it was over!"

"And it is, Vanessa!" Adam shouted back.

"Then prove it!" Vanessa replied.

Adam knew exactly what Vanessa was talking about. They'd been going out nearly all school year and hadn't once had sex. Before, Vanessa didn't pressure Adam because she knew that he was still trying to get over Brandon. And then Adam didn't pressure her because he wanted to take his time with the relationship. But now it seemed like Adam didn't want sex for the same reasons before. While Vanessa did.

"Vanessa..."

Adam was going to respond but stopped when he heard the front doorbell ring.

He looked at Vanessa who sighed and and sat on the edge of the bed while Adam headed for the stairs to go answer the door.

"Hey," Gino spoke, as carefully as possible.

Adam wasn't really hoping to have to see Gino, especially alone like this. Gino never really was his favorite person before and now he definitely wasn't ready to call him 'friend of the year'

"I called but I just figured you and Brandon were playing video games again," Gino replied, letting himself in.

Adam sighed and ran his fingers through his hair as he shut the door.

"So where's Brandon?" Gino asked, looking around.

"He's not with you?" Adam asked.

Gino looked dead at Adam.

"No....he's not here?" Gino asked.

Adam shook his head.

"Should we go look for him?" Gino asked.

"Definitely not," Vanessa replied, coming down the stairs.

Both boys looked up.

"Vanessa...hi," Gino spoke.

"Like I told Adam, Brandon can completely handle himself. He has his phone," Vanessa replied. "He's not answering because he's doing that interview remember?"

Gino rubbed his arm.

"Well yeah, but-"

"Just give him a little bit more time," Vanessa replied. "If he doesn't come home or call within the next thirty minutes, then you can panic."

Reluctantly, both Adam and Gino agreed but couldn't stop thinking that there was a possibility that maybe Brandon was in danger.


While I didn't want to ever admit it, Justin sure had a way with words. I had been with him nearly two hours and I was starting to like him just as much as everyone else.

Albeit, I didn't feel as though I was as gullible as everyone else, but his stories were so interesting, however untrue they were. And he didn't seem like such a bad guy. Plus he'd managed to figure me out spot on, which was completely an impressive feat.

But as I was just starting to realize that I'd been with him for longer than necessary, was I also starting to think about the fact that I'd turned my phone off. If anyone had tried to call me........

"We should probably wrap this up," I started, standing up.

"Oh, right," Justin spoke, standing as well. "Shit have we really been here that long?"

He was looking at the same clock I was.

"Yeah," I replied.

"I doubt anyone else is here," Justin replied. "I mean it is pretty late."

"Oh were you hoping to meet with someone?" I asked.

"Well no," Justin replied, looking down.

He'd opened the door to the room and I'd followed him out, only for us to both spot the last person I wanted or expected to see here so late.

I'm sure I looked just as shocked to see Chris as he did to see me, but being the social butterfly that Justin was, he looked completely calm and happy to see another face.

"Chris right?"

"Yeah," Chris replied, still looking at me even as Justin approached him.

I stayed right where I was.

"What are you like on some kind of school team or something?" Justin asked.

"Uh, I run track," Chris replied, finally taking his gaze off of me.

"You've been running around since school let out two hours ago?" Justin asked incredously. "Man, you've gotta be as hungry as I am."

Chris didn't reply as he instead stuffed a few things in his locker and shut it, picking up his track bag and putting the strap over his shoulder.

"I was thinking of going somewhere to eat but then I realized, I really don't know what's good around here," Justin spoke. "What do you say to showing a guy where to eat?"

Chris looked back at me before replying.

"I really don't-"

"Oh come on. I'll treat," Justin said.

I really didn't wanna go anywhere with Chris but Justin was gonna pay, plus I couldn't put him in the middle of what Chris and I had going on. It wouldn't be right.

"Look, um....well, let me just call home first and then we can go," I said, taking out my cell phone.

"Great," Justin smiled.

Here's to hoping that Chris wouldn't cause any trouble.


"I never got this show," Gino spoke as he sat on the couch watching an episode of Fear Factor. "I mean, sure the spider you swallow doesn't hurt you now. But what if it's pregnant and it's eggs get lodged in your throat and they hatch? Then what?"

Vanessa looked down at the sandwich she'd only taken a single bite out of before deciding she was no longer hungry.

"What the fuck are you doing talking about this shit when people are eating, huh?" Adam spoke, snatching the remote from Gino and turning the channel. "You never have been too bright, have you Gino?"

Gino made a move towards Adam but Vanessa rushed over and stood between them.

"Guys..." she said.

"Hey what the hell are you doing here still anyway?" Adam spoke. "Brandon's not here. Just go home."

"I see two squatters already in Brandon's house. What harm will three do?" Gino quipped.

Adam glared at Gino.

"Adam, let's just sit down and relax," Vanessa spoke, trying to get Adam to sit down.

Adam and Gino continued to glare at each other but both looked down at the phone once they heard it start to ring.

"Well squatter number one.....aren't you gonna get that?" Gino spoke bitterly.

Adam grabbed the phone and answered it.

"Yeah?"

"It's me," I started.

"Brandon....where the hell are you?" Adam asked.

"Going to dinner....with Justin," I replied as carefully as possible.

Adam sighed and looked down.

"Look, it's not how it sounds okay," I replied, feeling like I had to defend myself.

"What difference does that make?" Adam asked, sounding a bit rough.

"I just thought you might wanna know where I was, that's all," I replied.

"Well I was wondering, but I wasn't going nuts or anything like that," Adam lied. "Not like Gino."

Gino frowned as he looked over at Adam on the phone.

"Gino's there?" I asked.

"Yeah well, he's like a stray cat. Doesn't know when to leave," Adam replied.

I could tell that things must have been really tense between them and I didn't want to stay on the phone because I could feel the tension even through Adam's voice.

"Well, I know my folks are working late so I guess I don't have to worry about them," I spoke. "What about your mom?"

"Uh she's still with my abuela," Adam replied. "She might be home later on though....."

"Well, I'll be home in a couple of hours...."

The whole conversation just felt weird. Like it wasn't natural like it normally was. Maybe it was the fact that I had to check in with Adam actually living with me.

Still, the conversation was over.

"Bye," I replied, hanging up.

Adam looked over at Gino.

"He's with the new guy," he replied.

Gino frowned.

"I hope it doesn't mean they're friends now," he said.

Then he looked over at Adam and Vanessa.

"Well, I guess there isn't a reason for me to stick around here anymore," he said. "See ya around."

Adam glared at him as he watched him leave.


"Step brother?" Justin asked.

"Uh...not really," I replied, putting away my phone.

Chris looked away as he looked over his menu.

"You're an interesting guy Brandon," Justin replied.

"Thanks, I think," I replied.

"I'm serious. You both are," Justin replied.

This statement, of course, had both Chris and I looking up at each other.

"Excuse me?" I asked.

"Well it's just when I look at you both, I can see that you obviously have a past," Justin replied. "An interesting one at that."

"Yeah well that's all it is. The past," I replied.

Justin turned his head sideways as he continued to stare at me.

Chris said nothing as he pushed his menu aside and looked down.

"Oh come on, the two of you couldn't be any more different yet you were obviously connected," Justin replied. "Breaking the bonds of the typical preps versus punks stereotype."

Now Justin was starting to get on my nerves again. Just what the hell was the guy talking about exactly?

"Justin...there was no war between anyone," I said, off handed.

"Well come on, anyone can tell you that preps don't give the punks a fair chance."

I knew what he was getting at. I knew that thanks to my popular friends, I was apart of the 'prep' group Justin was going on about, even though he looked like he'd fit in well with us any day of the week.

Chris had just chosen today to dress more punk than usual. He had many different styles and tastes so he didn't belong to one particular group, which was where Justin was completely wrong.

"I see it all at every school I go to," Justin continued. "That's how I learned to be so good at figuring people out. Obviously, you two have the same history. What happened? I mean, did you drop Chris after he did something you didn't like?"

"Hey no offense, Justin, but I don't think you know what the hell you're talking about," I started.

This guy knew how to push all the wrong buttons because he was right most of the time. When he wasn't twisting things around.

"Really........because I think maybe I do-"

"And I think maybe you need to shut the fuck up!" I shouted, getting ready to stand up.

I wasn't much of a fighter, but this guy was making me want to punch his face in.

And Chris? What was he doing just sitting there not saying anything? He knew the truth. He knew that Justin was wrong in his stupid assumptions. After all, I was mostly innocent in what happened between us, not him.

Yet, there he was proving over to me the reason why I despised him. The reason why I was right to have cut him out of my life.

Sitting there with a smirk of approval. Approving of what Justin was saying.

"Chris!" I shouted.

I wasn't sure why I thought Chris would stick up for me, but I should have known better when he didn't.

"So Justin, tell me more about yourself," Chris said, finally deciding he wanted to speak.

I take back what I said about liking Justin. Jackass!


Adam and Vanessa sat in the dark watching 'The Notebook' on the flat screen in the living room.

Vanessa was laying against Adam's chest, who had his feet stretched over the coffee table in front of the couch.

Besides the fact that he wasn't really interested in the movie on screen to begin with, his mind was elsewhere. It was nearly 9. He knew where Brandon was. The problem was that he felt just a bit jealous.

Or maybe really jealous. For Brandon to be hanging around that cheesy new guy......especially after having made out with someone else's boyfriend.

It wasn't like the Brandon he knew. But what could he do anyway? He had Vanessa and she was great.

But still.....

"Adam what's wrong?" Vanessa asked.

"Hm? Oh....I guess I'm just a little tired," Adam lied.

If anything, worrying about Brandon was keeping him wide awake. But he kind of wanted Vanessa gone.

"Oh," Vanessa started, sitting up. "I guess it is getting kinda late. I should go."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Adam spoke, standing and walking Vanessa to the door.

"Well," Vanessa started as she turned towards Adam. "You're almost a good boyfriend when you aren't thinking about Brandon."

And with that, she kissed him on the cheek and left.

Adam stood by the door thinking.

He wasn't going to bed until Brandon got home. ***********************************************************************

Why didn't I see something like this coming? Chris and Justin were now the best of friends and my ignoring them was all I could do to keep from jumping on Justin and attempting to beat the shit out of him.

Chris and Justin had spent the entire time laughing and sharing all kinds of stories. You'd think they were old friends making up for lost times. But I knew better. I knew they were really just alike. And that wasn't a good thing.

The only reason I hadn't left was because I didn't wanna go home and face Adam after that weird conversation, not so soon anyway. That and we were at a pretty high up eating establishment that I'd never be able to pay for alone, even if I did have a job.

But now that we were done eating, I figured it was about time someone took me home so I could hurry up and pretend like this night never happened.

"Um, okay so let's pay and leave," I said, interrupting yet another joke between Chris and Justin. "I'm kinda tired."

Justin stopped laughing and looked around.

"Dude, you know what would be so crazy right now?" he started.

Chris looked up and around before looking back at Justin with an evil grin.

I was lost as to what was going on but I didn't like the looks on their faces.

I especially didn't like what was going on when Chris and Justin stood up.

"Guys...what about the bill?" I asked.

"Come on," Chris spoke, looking around.

"Wait a second...you wanna skip out on the bill?" I asked.

"Dude keep your fucking voice down," Justin commented still looking around.

"Justin just pay. Aren't you.."

"Shhh....and I never said anything about that," Justin replied.

Here I was thinking the boy had at least some kind of money when he was no richer than Chris or I were.

Still, I wasn't a criminal. I didn't have nearly enough money to pay for the meals, though.

I was panicking, especially once Justin started towards the exit.

Chris stayed, but he looked as though he were growing impatient with me.

"Brandon, man, come on!"

"No, I won't-"

"Get up!" Chris spoke, forcing me to my feet, me objecting.

I guess all the commotion had gotten the waiters attention as he was now heading in our direction.

"Let's go!" Chris shouted running for the exit.

There was nothing I could do about it all now so I just ran out too.

The three of us jumped into Justin's car and sped off. Turning around, I could see the waiter waving his fist in the air after us. He also had a tablet of paper in his hands and looked as if he was trying to see something on the car. The license plate, maybe.

All I knew was that once again I had allowed Chris to get me into trouble. This time he had help even. It just reinforced that I had made the right decision about him after all.

"Man I swear, that was fucking awesome!" Justin shouted.

Chris was laughing but I could see him looking at me in the mirror.

"Brandon...look..."

"Just take me home please, Justin," I started, cutting Chris off. "I guess I was right all along."

Chris sighed and looked down while Justin looked over at him and then at me in the mirror thinking to himself. ***********************************************************************

"What?" I asked as soon as I saw Adam sitting next to the door.

Adam stood up and looked at me.

"What?"

"Nothing....you're home," he replied.

"Yeah. I had a bad night that I have no interest in talking about so I'm just gonna go to bed. Night," I replied.

It was so bad I didn't even want to talk to Adam about it. Hopefully this would be something I actually forget for a change.

"Night..." Adam sighed, watching as I walked up the stairs.


Well, no luck in forgetting what happened the previous night. But it didn't matter to me anyway. I decided that it would be best if just ignored Chris for the rest of the year. Justin too. It would better that way.

"Oh well I'd have to say that my most crowning achievement was taking my cheerleading team all the way to nationals last year," Michelle spoke. "That and showing up to school looking better than everyone else everyday."

What the hell was going on? Seriously weird shit.

Michelle was surrounded by a large group of people, all of which were standing behind a guy holding a camera taping everything Michelle said.

"Michelle?" I started, walking up to her.

"Oh hey Brandon," Michelle spoke, pulling me over to her. "Actually stand to the left, the light looks better on me from the other side."

I did as she said but was still confused as to what the hell was going on.

"Everyone, this is one of my best friends in the entire world. I mean I have so many, but none of them as famous as Brandon," Michelle spoke. "I mean I'm sure you've all heard his tragic story."

Looking around I could several people nodding sympathetically.

"Uh, Michelle can I talk to you for a sec?" I asked.

"In a sec," Michelle replied. "I haven't told them about the time I had to fight a social injustice at Neiman Marcus."

Still confused, I walked off noticing Alex and Jade standing in a corner watching us.

"Please tell me this is some kind of joke," I said, turning around to watch as Michelle continued blabbing to the camera.

"I wish. I mean the girl already loves to talk but when you stick a camera in front of her...." Alex replied.

"It's for the school centennial coming up. They're interviewing certain people for a video diary they're gonna put in the time capsule," Jade replied.

"And in what universe would anyone find Michelle interesting?" I asked, feeling sorry for the suckers who would have to watch the video a hundred years from now.

"I don't know, they've been interviewing some pretty popular kids," Jade replied.

"Really? Well have they done you two yet?" I asked.

"Not yet but I need to think of some interesting stories to tell so I don't look so boring," Jade replied.

"You know who's idea this whole thing was don't you?" Alex asked looking behind me.

I turned to look where he was and spotted Justin standing to the side talking to Chris.

I sighed angrily and turned back around.

"So how did the interview go last night?" Jade asked.

"Let's just say it won't be happening again," I replied.

I guess Justin wanted to counter his lies by having everyone else tell their own on camera, then he'd still look like the most interesting guy in school, since the whole thing was his idea.

He sure did know how to plan his situations just right.

"Didn't go so well huh?" Alex asked. "That's okay. You still have me."

"Don't remind me," I joked.

"Hey," Gino spoke joining the group. "Am I having a nightmare or is Michelle on camera?"

"You're having a nightmare AND Michelle's on camera," I replied.

"That's what I thought," Gino replied.

"This whole thing is just weird. All of a sudden Angst's finest students are the only reason to come to school now?" Jade spoke.

And now they were all coming our way.

"Alex Rodriguez?" the camera guy asked.

"Uh...yeah," Alex replied.

"You're up next," he replied, turning on the camera.

Alex looked over at me.

"Hollywood, here I come," he replied, smiling for the camera.

Through all this excitement, I had failed to notice that Adam was nowhere in sight. It figured. I mean, I left for school before he did. I was mad at him for being mad at me. I think. He was treating me strange and it was making it strange to be around him. And now I wanted to know where he was.

"I'm gonna go find Adam," I spoke.


"So about yesterday....was I right?" Justin asked.

"Right about what?" Chris asked, moving past him.

"About you and Brandon having a past? Let me guess, you guys go deeper than friends and he won't talk to you anymore?"

Chris shrugged.

"How do you know I'm the one not talking to him?"

"I've dealt with people like Brandon before. It hurts to have someone you care about just ignore you without giving you a fair chance," Justin replied. "I should know."

"Yeah well it doesn't matter anyway. His friends all want him to stay away from me. And then he's in love with someone else....."

"What right do his friends have to get between the two of you?" Justin spoke.

Chris knew that maybe it was partially his fault for his situation. He still hated his friends for keeping him away. And Justin was right. It wasn't their place or decision to make.

"So you wanna do something about it?" Justin asked, grinning.

Chris looked up at him.

"What do you have in mind?" he asked.


"I can't keep doing this if you're gonna keep thinking about Brandon!" I heard Vanessa shouting.

Seeing as how most everyone was wherever the film people were, Vanessa and Adam were in a hallway talking that was pretty much abandoned.

I wasn't expecting them to be alone and the last thing I wanted to do was spy on them but I did hear my name come up which meant that they were fighting over me.

"Vanessa I can't help it....we...."

"What? You live together now, Sure, whatever but that was the first straw-"

"Vanessa-"

"I mean what idiot stays with somebody who moves in with their ex?"

From where I was standing, it was easy for me to see them but they couldn't see me. I heard Adam sigh and saw him running his fingers through his hair, something he always did whenever he was frustrated.

"Vanessa, please, will you just calm down?"

"That's what I've been doing Adam. Staying calm while you were lusting after your ex when I first met you. But that was then and here we are now and you still can't stop thinking about him!"

If that was true, then why had Adam been acting so strange lately?

"Vanessa, you don't understand anything that's been going on. I don't.......want to think about him."

"And I don't want you thinking about him so I guess we have a problem then don't we?" Vanessa spoke.

Adam really looked like he didn't know what to do and I was starting to wonder a few things myself.

"I'll try. I've been trying, but I'll try harder," Adam replied, taking Vanessa's hands into his own. "I like being with you."

Vanessa's angry look softened as Adam held her.

"I know you're trying...." she replied. "And all I ever wanted to do was be a good friend to you and help you through stuff."

Adam smiled as he put his arm around Vanessa.

I was about to run off somewhere when I was pulled into a room by an unknown person. When I turned around, I saw another camera man aiming a camera at me.

"Brandon Jameson?" he asked.

"Yeah..." I replied, shielding my eyes from the light.

"You're on," he replied.

Great. Just what I needed right now. ***********************************************************************

By the end of the day, I was just glad all the hoopla concerning this centennial video was done. As far as I knew, Gino, Michelle, Jade, Alex, Krystal and I had all been just a few of the fifty students to get interviewed. Adam was probably interviewed as well, and if he had been, he hadn't told me.

Upon leaving Theater Arts, I'm sure the first thing everyone noticed, right along with me was how there seemed to be a tv set up at every corner. We had a few t.v's hanging from the ceilings to showcase announcements but nothing like the dozens that were lined up outside as if something were about to happen.

I just assumed that they were going to air the portion of our interviews that were with other people. We all had to do two interviews. A personal interview where we revealed all our deepest secrets and then a general interview talking about our life at school.

I just hoped nothing bad was going to happen.

"What's with all the t.v's?" Ryan asked, nudging my arm as the one closest to us came on, followed by all the rest of them.

Out of the corner of my eye I could see my friends standing by another one, and Chris and Justin not too far away standing at another.

On the screen closest to us though, was Adam, who was by himself sitting in front of the camera.

"I guess the one thing that I regret the most would have to be not trusting him....." he was saying.

The students all around looked thoroughly confused. Each television had a different person on it and each person seemed to be revealing all their secrets, for everyone to hear!

"I blame myself for what happened to him everyday. Which just makes me want him even more."

While I could see Adam on screen telling his secrets, looking around, the faces on most of the students seemed to be that of shock. 50 of the school's most popular students' secrets were being revealed for all the school to hear!

No one was supposed to know about any of this stuff until we were all dead 100 years from now!

"Oh my god!" I heard Adam mumble. I looked over at him but he didn't seem to want to look at me.

"What's going on?" Alex asked, walking over to me.

Looking to where he'd come from, he had been watching a screen with Chris on it, telling all his secrets.

"I've only ever loved one person the way I thought I was starting to love Brandon. They're closer than you think you know. I mean I had to move..."

Alex rushed over to the television and shut it off while Ryan worked to shut of the others.

"Show's over folks, nothing to see here!" he shouted.

"Who the fuck did this?" Alex asked, sounding angrier than I'd ever heard him sound sound before.

People were looking horrified, confused, amused, and afraid. All the emotions that I was feeling all at once.

"God, you people really are pathetic aren't you?" Justin laughed, heading outside.

People seemed to be in more of a rush to get home than usual. Probably because no one wanted to face each other after what they'd heard.

"Chris...." I started, looking over at him.

I had a feeling he knew what was going on.

"I didn't know that's what he was talking about." Chris said, sounding defeated.

"What the fuck are you talking about? Huh?" Alex asked, shoving Chris against a row of lockers.

A moment later, Jade, Krystal, Michelle, and Vanessa all rushed over to us.

Krystal and Michelle exchanged sour looks.

"My hair is so not fake!" Michelle spoke, bitterly.

"And I wasn't born a man!" Krystal shouted back.

Obviously they'd both taken the time to make jokes on film. Jokes they probably didn't think each other would ever hear.

"I can't believe this is happening," Jade spoke, sounding horrified. "How am I supposed to face Stephen now?"

I guess that meant she had confessed a secret about him.

I wasn't worried about what I'd said about anyone. It was all true, nothing embarrassing for anyone but myself.

"You did this, didn't you?" Alex asked.

"What....no, Justin..." Chris spoke, he looked away from Alex.

"Well where the hell is he?" Alex asked.

By now the school halls were pretty empty as everyone left in a hurry. I didn't blame them either. This was a well planned disaster.

"Adam!" Vanessa exclaimed, sounding highly pissed.

"Vanessa...." Adam strayed.

"Come on Vanessa. Let's get away from this bitch!" Krystal spoke, grabbing her cousin.

"Yeah Jade, let's go!" Michelle shouted, grabbing Jade.

"I guess uh....I should go," Ryan started, not really knowing what to do.

I'm sure he felt just as awkward as I did right now.

"Where's Gino?" I spoke, looking around.

He was interviewed as well. I think. So where was he?

"Doesn't matter," Alex replied, starting down the hall. He looked pissed and I knew what he was capable of when he was this upset.

"Alex, wait!" I started, rushing after him, Adam beside me. "What are you gonna do?"

"I'm gonna find the little rat bastard and whoop his ass!" Alex replied.


"Are you crazy? I like it here. Everyone's so gullible," Justin replied.

"Yeah well you did what I paid you to do so now you have to get the hell out of town," Gino replied.

"Look, you may be Mr. Moneybags and all, but all I have to do is tell your friends that you're the one that paid me to come here and break up your little friends relationships with each other, then the power shifts easily to my hands," Justin replied.

Gino sighed with annoyance.

"Look, I really think you need to just go. You don't wanna be around here if they find you," he replied.

"Ooooh, I'm so scared," Justin spoke. "Not. I know how to handle a bunch of little rich kids."

"I don't think you get it. You can't be here when-"

"There he goes!" Alex replied, rushing over towards Justin, who fell to the ground once Alex tackled him.

Gino jumped back.

"What are you doing with him? I asked.

"Trying to get him to admit it was him that did this," Gino lied.

We'd looked everywhere for Justin and finally found him in the lot between the school and the parking lot. Basically, off school grounds.

Justin kicked Alex off of him and slammed his head into a bench, knocking him out.

"Alex!" I shouted, starting towards him but stopped when Justin pulled out a gun.

"What? Now who's the little bitch?" Justin spoke.

"Whoa...dude..put that away," Gino spoke.

Chris came running up from a corner and stopped when he saw what was going on.

"Justin?"

"Oh hey man...come over here for a second," Justin replied.

Noting the gun in his hand, Chris did as Justin had asked.

"See, I got em scared. Broken," Justin replied. "Feeling helpless and alone just like they made you feel."

"Justin, come on man, you don't need that thing?"

"Don't go soft on me now man. I got em," Justin replied, turning his head towards Chris. "I fucking got em."

I don't know what came over me, but once Justin had his head turned I tried rushing towards him, but he turned back and I stopped.

"Yo, back the fuck up!" Justin shouted, putting the gun up to where it was level to my face.

"Justin, please!" Chris begged.

"Justin please," Justin mimicked. "Don't be a little pussy man. Right now, you and I have the power. We're superior to them!"

"Get that gun out of my face man!" I shouted.

"What face? When I blow it off," Justin spoke, cocking the gun, ready to shoot. "You won't be saying that will you?"

I guess Adam's defensive instincts kicked in again because no less than a second after Justin had threatened me did he jump on Justin and began a struggle with him for control of the gun.

"Adam!" I shouted.

Chris tried to help, but was kicked back by Justin over to me.

"Brandon..I'm sorry.."

"Shut the hell up," I shouted rushing over to Adam.

I was just about to help him when I heard the gun go off. And then they both stopped moving.

"No...no please God not again!" I shouted.

Justin looked wide eyed. Shocked. So did Adam. It was hard to tell who'd been shot and where.

Until Adam quickly jumped off of Justin.

"Oh my god!" Gino shrieked.

Chris took out his cell phone to call the paramedics.

"Is he....."

Gino walked over to Justin to feel for a pulse.

"Yeah.........."

That little bit of info made the shocked look on Adam's face turn to one of horror.

"I can't believe this," Chris said while on the phone waiting for 911.

This wasn't the scandal I'm sure Stephen wanted. But that's what this was. A horrible scandal gone wrong.

He wanted a scandal, and he got one.


Copyright 2005

Next: Chapter 39


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