Angst

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. I do not write about frank sexual situations, nor do I have any desire to.

This is a story about teen love and discovery. Still though, it is a gay work of fiction.

If such work offends you or you are not old enough to read in your area, then do not continue reading.

Please do not copy and paste onto another website without emailing me first. In most cases I'd be glad to let you post on another site, as long as you ask first!

Angst Episode 22 "The Final Destination"

I opened my eyes slowly.

My head hurt like hell. So did my jaw.

Where was I?

"You're up."

It was John. He was crouched down beside me, staring at me thoughtfully.

I looked down at my hands and legs. They were tied up. So I couldn't leave.

Looking around, I realized that we were outside somewhere. I could hear water, so I knew that we were also near the river.

Then it suddenly hit me. I remembered that John had fought with me, and somewhere along the way, I must have passed out. But instead of helping me by calling an ambulance or something, John had done the obvious thing a psycho like himself would do: tie me up and drag me somewhere.

This wasn't good. The guy was crazy. I needed help.

"Heeeelllllllp! Somebody-"

I was stopped short when John snatched my jaw with his hands and quickly applied duct tape to my mouth.

"You're not going anywhere," he said.

Adam looked up at a brightly lit clock that hung just above one of the doors that led into the penthouse suite.

It was a little bit after 11 at night, which meant that it had been two hours since he had seen Brandon, John, or Gino.

He didn't want to be worried about any of them, but the truth was that he was worried. Especially about Brandon.

Of course, he hadn't really put much thought into what he had learned earlier that night. About the fact that Gino was gay. He'd always suspected that Gino had a thing for Brandon, but he wouldn't go so far as to say that he thought he was gay. But he was, and truthfully, he wasn't as shocked as everyone else had been. He sort of expected it.

Mike had ditched him, for lack of interest, and for the past half hour, he'd been drowning in his own pool of sorrow, better known as Jack Daniels.

He was however, still sober enough to notice Gino finally show his face back in the suite.

He stood up up and met Gino halfway, who looked as though he'd just come from having thrown up.

"Adam...." were Gino's first words.

Adam just scowled at Gino, slightly of unsure of what he wanted to say. After an uncomfortable half a minute of staring, Adam finally spoke.

"So you're gay huh."

Gino was still highly upset about that. It was one thing that everyone now knew his deepest secret. But the way they had found out had been one of the worst things to ever happen to him. It made him sick to his stomach. So sick that he had spent two hours in the restroom, locked inside, throwing up and crying his eyes out. Crying because he was sad. But then, just a few minutes ago, he suddenly realized that he had to get over it. And that's where his anger came in.

"Look Adam-"

"So I guess since you've always been gay, you've always wanted my boyfriend right?" Adam asked, a bit spitefully "Even before we were together?"

While that may have been true, Gino still didn't appreciate the way Adam had said it. Accusatory.

"I couldn't help the way I felt," he replied.

Adam crossed his arms, chuckling a little.

"Yeah, we all know that now."

"At least I kept it to myself."

"Kept it to yourself?" Adam asked incredulously. "You were so obvious Gino. Why do you think you and I never got along all year?"

Gino had just figured that to be a personality defect on Adam's part.

"And what about John? Is Brandon right? Was there a note?" Adam asked.

Most of him, believed that Brandon did indeed have some kind of note. But there was still a part of him that was refusing to believe anything he had to say. That was the part that seemed to be winning out a lot lately.

Gino glanced down at the ground and then back up at Adam.

"Does it really matter now?" he asked. "It's all out in the open now."

He didn't give Adam a chance to respond as he walked off, looking slightly dazed, but mostly just exhausted.

And looking back up a the clock once more, it was then that Adam realized that he truly missed his boyfriend.

"Now, Brandon, I'll take this tape off your mouth," John started.

I watched as he reached into a large burlap sack and pulled out a small handgun.

"But if you scream, I'll blow your fucking brains out. You hear me?"

Fearing for my life, I agreed to the terms the only way I could, by nodding my head feverishly.

John stared at me for a brief second, almost like he was trying to determine whether or not he could trust that I wouldn't scream because I didn't believe that he would indeed shoot me, but he took the tape off of my mouth, however roughly, anyway.

True to my word, I hadn't screamed.

John seemed to noticed that, as he put the gun between the waistband of his jeans.

He looked behind him briefly before moving back over to his brown sack, going through it again. For what, I had no idea.

I watched as he messed with things inside the bag. Things I couldn't see. But I figured it was almost like he was taking inventory. Seeing what was there and what wasn't.

"Where are we?" I asked.

I already had a slight inkling as to where we were as I knew we were indeed at a pier by running water. But I still didn't know where exactly.

John looked up at me briefly, and then went back to what he was doing.

"Why did you bring me here?" I asked.

With that question, John stopped what he was doing. His look turned into a look I had never seen on his beautiful yet twisted face. It seemed almost as though he were deep in thought. Trying to recant something.

"You know, I really don't get how you knew," John started, after he finally looked my way.

"Knew about what?"

"You kept calling me crazy......I'm not crazy."

Yeah. Right. Because knocking somebody out and tying up their hands and legs so that they couldn't escape wasn't crazy at all.

"I was just........"

He stopped, looking out over the pier. I looked that way for a moment and then I looked back at John, studying his face. His features. He really seemed to be lost at thought. Human almost.

And I realized something. I almost felt compelled. Compelled to want to know why he looked troubled. Like I cared.

Which surprised me when I found myself probing.

"So tell me about him," I started. "Your mom told me about your boyfriend."

John looked back at me.

"You had no right talking to my mother, you know that!" he screamed.

"I know, and I'm sorry," I lied.

I wasn't sorry. Right now sorry was the last thing I was. Right now, I was afraid.

"Yeah......well, you should be."

John had looked back out over into the river, seeming to be back in thought.

If I was going to die, however dreadful the thought was, then I was at least going to get John to tell me everything.

"John.......you have to understand, I just...I have a thing....with people," I started as best I could." I was only looking out for Gino."

"And what? You thought I wasn't good enough for him?"

It scared me a little that we were talking in past tense. But I was slowly starting to lose my initial fear and beginning to get comfortable with John, as weird as it sounded.

"No that's not it"

Honestly, my initial gut reaction of John, the one that had told me there was something about him that I should have been cautious about, might have had something to do with me not wanting to see him with Gino. It may have been jealousy.

But honestly, looking back on it now, I realize that that was far from the real reason.

Of course, sitting here tied up in front of John was as bright a red flag as I was ever going to get.

"Greg thought I wasn't good enough for him too," John spoke, breaking the silence.

So his name was Greg. That must have been the guy John's mother told me about when we talked............

5 weeks ago

After the butler had let me in, he'd left my by myself standing at the front door.

I couldn't help but note that he was either a very trusting person, or there were cameras watching my every move at the moment.

"Right this way sir,"

I followed the butler for what seemed like a good twenty or thirty seconds all the way to the other side of the mansion to a spacious room I guessed to be the living room, if that's what rich people still called them.

Immediately I noticed the tall skinny woman standing at a large paneled window, looking out over into a large lake, that they probably no doubt owned.

From behind, she was a statuesque picture of femininity and beauty standing at a good six or so feet. Her hair was a dark brunette, adjusted with perfect flips that looked as though they took whoever did her hair hours to do. Her figure was one that rivaled even Jade's as she looked petite enough for her job, which was as John said, a model. But even with all that, I could still tell that she was a mother.

I cleared my throat to announce my presence and John's mother quickly tuned around.

Studying her face, I was surprised. She didn't seem to look a day over thirty. And I wasn't even sure if even thirty was the appropriate age for her.

"Ah, you must be John's friend, right?" she spoke, walking away from the window and over to and expensive Italian leather couch on which so proceeded to take a seat.

"Ah yeah....I'm Brandon."

I was a bit hesitant to tell her my name because I almost thought that maybe John would have told her about me and how I'd basically called him a crazy liar in front of all my friends.

"Well, nice to meet you Brandon. I'm Caroline," she replied, extending a hand out for me to shake to which I promptly did so.

"Have a seat"

I did so, taking a seat opposite of her that was less than three feet away from her.

"So what can I do for you today Brandon?" Caroline asked.

It was odd, but I was amazed by how friendly she seemed. I mean here I was, some random teenager, showing up in her expensive mansion sitting on her expensive furniture and for all she knew, I could have been a thief or a serial killer. Hell for all she knew, I may not have even known John!

"Well," I started.

I paused. I knew what I had come here for but I still had no idea how I wanted to start the conversation.

"I guess....well, I guess I'm just a little worried about John."

Caroline, who had kept a slight smile on her face the entire time I had been looking at her, seem to shift slightly when I mentioned this.

"Worried?"

"Yeah," I replied "He's....sorta....how do I put this.....involved with me and my friends now."

I realized how either confusing or idiotic I sounded but that was just a testament to how awkward I was feeling. I was beginning to feel that this whole thing had been a horrible idea. But there was no turning back now.

"Well I get that," Caroline replied. "John's always been a pretty popular guy."

I had to wonder, was he popular because he had money? Because I still didn't see his so called "charm" that Gino and everyone else did.

"Yeah...I guess so," I replied, feeling completely ready to give up and change the subject.

Until I saw something. Sitting out directly next to me was was a picture. Who was in the picture was what was so troubling. It was John. Smiling and looking happy. And with him there was some cute white guy. They were both smiling and had their arms around each other.

"Ah.....actually," I started.

Looking at the picture had given me and idea that I was about to run with.

"What I meant was that John's involved with one of my friends in particular."

Caroline didn't seem to notice that I had seen the picture, which, to me, seemed out of place. Almost as if John or somebody else had recently been looking at it and had forgotten to put it back up.

"My friend Gino...."

Caroline's warm smile faded. And then I noticed her look in the direction of the picture, which obviously meant that she'd been the one looking at it.

"When you say involved....."

"I mean obsessed." I replied.

I was hoping that there was a chance that Ryan was right. That John really was a crazy stalker in love with Gino. But it had still been Ryan's mouth the words had come from, and even thinking them to myself seemed just a tad misconceived.

Caroline looked glazed now.

"I was afraid of this happening again," she sighed.

Again? Wait...so, Ryan was right then?

Caroline had gotten off of the couch and had walked back over to the window she had been standing in front of when I first saw her.

"I hate to go behind his back like this," I started, hoping to get more out of her. "I'm just concerned for John....and my friend."

"You say you're John's friend?" Caroline asked, back facing me.

"Uh...yes ma'am." I lied.

John and I would never be friends.

"Then I guess I should tell you something then," she replied, turning around to face me, a grave look plastered onto her young face.

Ryan stood watching Michelle talk with a large group of girls from a far. So far, that's really all he had been doing since he had arrived at the party. Watching Michelle. And thinking. About the times they use to share together, however sexually platonic they were.

And thinking about how he wanted her more than ever now.

He decided now was as good a time as any as Michelle had left the girls and was heading into the kitchen.

"Hey sexy," Ryan spoke, grabbing Michelle from behind, who was bent over reaching into an ice cabinet.

Michelle quickly turned around, shoving Ryan off of her.

"What the hell's the matter with you?"

Ryan grinned.

"I just figured-"

"Ugh, Ryan, not again."

Michelle was far from being over Ryan. She was so tired of him and his desperate little attempts of getting back with her it wasn't cute anymore. Not that it had ever been cute.

"Michelle you know I want you back," Ryan started. "And If you'd just give me a chance-"

"Give you a chance so you can turn gay on me too?"

Ryan's somewhat quirky grin faded.

"Michelle, you know I'm not a fag."

"And I could care less," Michelle replied, trying to by pass Ryan.

But she was quickly stopped when he grabbed her arm by the end of her elbow, forcing her to turn around.

"Why won't you just give me another chance?"

"Because Ryan!........because......you and I never should have happened in the first place, okay!"

"But-"

"No buts, Ryan. I'm over you. I've been over you for months," Michelle replied. "And I think its about time you get over me too."

She gave Ryan a sympathetic look before walking off to rejoin her friends on the dance floor, while Ryan stood, feeling somewhat confused, but mostly hurt. And alone. Again.

I watched John intently as he stared out over the pier. I wasn't really paying any attention to how cold it was outside, even for the end of May. Adrenaline had taken over me and I wanted to hear John's side of the story and see if I could learn how a psycho thinks.

"John....." I started.

He hadn't said anything for ten minutes, and just keeping me tied up on the dock of a fishing pier, seemed to be out of his mind for the time being.

He didn't answer me however. Instead he just turned around and gave me the most unreadable look I'd ever seen on a person.

"Since you have me here.......I'm willing to listen to you," I said.

And that was actually the truth.

"Right," John snorted.

He stood up and walked to the edge of the pier, which was about five feet away from where he had me tied up on the ground.

"How much did my mother tell you anyway?" John asked, back turned to me.

I still had no idea how he knew.

But looking back on it now, maybe Caroline had told me a little too much.

"I guess I should start with when John....ran away," Caroline started.

She had moved back over to the sofa opposite me and had gotten comfortable once again, which told me that the woman was getting ready to tell me quite the story.

"We'd...his father and I....we'd noticed a change in him lately," Caroline continued. "Of course, now that I think about it, it's amazing his father saw anything at all considering he spends most of his time at the office."

So John started getting crazy due to lack of attention at home. Made sense to me.

"But we thought nothing of it. I mean, up until that point he....didn't really know him that well. John's always been really close to me.....and a mother knows her son."

Okay...what did she mean by that.

"I suppose I always knew....about him being...gay I mean."

And I always knew as well. But get to the part where he goes crazy.

"I should have seen it. I mean, I should have seen how....taken he'd become with his best friend."

Hmmm? His boyfriend I guess.

I noticed Caroline look in the direction of the picture on the table again. She didn't pick it up, and she did it so discreetly that she probably didn't think I noticed. But I could tell that her telling this story to me was doing something to her. Something that was making her somewhat unaware of her actions.

"I'm sorry...this is just really hard...."

"I get it," i replied. "You're his mom. And I'm just his friend. I mean, what do I know?"

"You really care about him don't you?"

Well that had certainly caught me off guard. But we weren't friends, make no mistake.

"Yeah....something like that," I replied, feeling a lot more uncomfortable than before.

"He's a good kid...he just made a mistake," Caroline replied.

"Well I mean...he told us about that...I think. Something about him being crazy."

"He used that word?"

Well.....

"God...it was his father's decision to put him in the asylum, not mine," Caroline replied. "It was either that or a juvenile retention center."

Oh god, what the hell did this guy do exactly?

"You have to understand, when he ran off, he took the boy with him against his will. An entire month went by and no one knew where they were."

Caroline's voice had slowly been raising while she spoke to me, but she had suddenly just stopped and walked over to the picture.

"Well, I've taken up enough of your time," she spoke. "You probably should be getting back to school, right?"

I stood up, looking Caroline in the eyes.

"Yeah...uh, thank you," I replied.

I started to leave.

"Ah....."

I stopped and turned around.

"I just....I think that maybe you should keep an eye on John...I mean I love him, but he can be.....well.....just keep being a good friend to him. Try not to worry so much."

This coming from a woman who confirmed my worst fears.......

"Ah...I can show myself out," I spoke, turning to leave.

That whole conversation was just weird. Like something was off about Caroline. Maybe John got the crazy gene from her. It was hard to say. But I was definitely feeling a lot more shaken up than I thought I would be.

But still, I now had what I needed to bring John down at the dance tonight. I just wish I didn't feel almost sorry to have to do it.

"I know about the kidnapping," I said, catching John off guard.

"She told you about that?"

"You'd be surprised how much I know," I replied.

John walked over to me and sat down next to me.

He looked glazed almost, staring off in no particular direction.

"I was in love with him," he said, more to himself seemingly, than me.

"And he told them that I kidnapped him."

"Well," I started, against the better part of me, "What happened?"

John looked in my direction now.

"I told him I was gay and he....he was okay with it," John replied. "But then I told him that I was in love with him."

Kind of like him being in love with Gino. Yes, I now saw the pattern.

"Let me guess.....the guy went nuts on you right?"

From the look on John's face I could tell that I was right.

"I just...I had to make him understand. You know?"

And obviously, he didn't.

"But we couldn't be around other people. I had to make him love me and only me. I knew he would...with time, I knew he would."

"John, you can't make people fall in love with you," I said. "I mean...is that what you thought was gonna happen with Gino."

When John jumped up suddenly, I realized that I had finally said the wrong thing.

"Gino was never gonna work out....because of you!"

Now I was scared.

"John...."

He reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone.

"John what are you doing?"

He didn't reply. Instead he just started dialing a number, still glaring at me.

"John-"

"Shut the FUCK UP!" he bellowed, as he listened to the phone ringing

Gino had stopped enjoying the party. He hadn't been enjoying it since.....well since the last time he'd seen either Brandon or John.

Instead he'd just been sitting on the oversized sofa in the far corner of the room where the party was still abuzz even at after 11:30 at night.

He was jolted out of his slum however, when he suddenly felt his pocket vibrating.

Taking out what he knew was his cellphone, he answered it.

"Hello?" he spoke.

"Gino....it's me," John spoke.

"John?" Gino spoke up.

He got up and made his way out the door.

"John, where are you?"

"Well....I'm with your crush, Brandon," John replied.

"What?"

"Yeah,,,it's a funny story you know," John started. "It turns out, your lover was right about me."

"John, I'm not understanding what you're-"

"Look I wanted you. Want you. But it's clear that's not gonna happen as long as Brandon's in the picture," John elaborated.

"John.....where are you?" Gino asked, now completely worried for Brandon's safety.

"Do me a favor and put Adam on the phone for me," John spoke.

"John, let me talk to Brandon."

"Gino, put Adam on the phone. Now!"

Fearing that John might do something irrational, Gino rushed back into the party and looked for Adam. Luckily he didn't have to look to far as he spotted Adam getting a drink in the kitchen.

"Adam!" he exclaimed.

Adam turned around.

"Ugh, what do you want?" he spoke.

"It's John," Gino spoke.

"What?"

"Here," Gino spoke, handing Adam the phone.

Admittedly, he was confused, but he still took the phone.

"Ah, hello?'

"Ah, Adam," John started.

"John what the fuck is this about?" Adam asked.

"Well...I think you know," John started.

"No John, I don't."

"Well, you would if you'd have just listened to your boyfriend from the start."

Adam looked over at Gino's panicked face and quickly realized that something was definitely wrong.

"John, what's going on?"

"It's too bad the way you left things with your boyfriend," John started.

Adam tried to pick up on where John had taken Brandon. All he could hear was the sound of water. And it was obvious that he was outside somewhere.

"John....."

"And you can tell Gino that since I can't have him.....he can't have Brandon either."

And with that, John ended the conversation by hanging up the phone.

Adam just stood, holding it to his ear. He almost didn't know what to do.

"He was right....." he said, finally.

Gino swallowed.

"What did he say? Where are they?" Gino asked.

"He was right Gino! You're little friend is a FUCKING PSYCHO GINO!!" Adam exclaimed, grabbing Gino's shirt collar.

"Get off of me!"

"This is YOUR fault!" Adam exclaimed.

"Don't play that shit with me asshole!" Gino exclaimed. "You abandoned him too remember!"

Adam had snapped and punched Gino square across the face.

People around, the ones sober enough to know what was going on, had stopped dancing and stared.

Michelle, Jade, Krystal, Alex, and Ryan all rushed over to the fight in progress.

"Hey what the hell!" Michelle exclaimed.

"Hey Adam, come on man," Alex said, stopping Adam from trying to take another swing at Gino.

"What's going on?" Jade asked.

"We have to go," Adam replied.

"What? Why?" Jade asked.

"We have to find Brandon," Adam replied, heading for the door.

Jade and Alex looked at Gino.

"Come on," he spoke, following Adam.

"What's going on?" Krystal asked.

"Just stay here," Jade spoke. "Well be right back."

She didn't know if that was true. But she was worried.

Adam hadn't stopped for anybody. Not even the elevator, as he opted to jet down the stairs in favor of waiting for the elevator to come up.

"Can somebody please explain to us what's going on?" Jade asked, as she followed Gino down the stairs.

"Brandon was right about John, okay?" Gino replied. "He's with John right now.....and I think he's planning on doing something to him."

"Oh my god," Jade gasped.

John had just been tinkering with his burlap sack for the past half hour, not speaking a word to me since the weird phone call he had made to my friends.

But I knew one thing was for sure. The guy was planning to kill me.

"John....." I started, hoping to bid for some more time.

Just as I thought, he didn't answer me.

But I had to wonder what the hell exactly was in that bag of his.

Just when I started to stop wondering, it seemed as though John was finally doing something. He had pulled out some duct tape from the bag and walked over to me.

"John...wait a second....you don't wanna do this,"

"Oh really? And why not?"

"You said you aren't crazy....and if you do whatever it is you're about to do, people will think you're crazy. Gino, will think you're crazy."

"Like they already do because of you," John replied.

"Look, if you let me go, I promise I won't press charges," I bargained.

Anything not to have to die tonight.

"Too late for that," John replied, covering my mouth with the tape

"Come on man, faster!" Adam exclaimed.

"Just sit back Adam, alright!" Alex exclaimed from the drivers seat.

"If he's at the river like you said we should get there soon enough," Jade replied.

"I can't believe it," Alex replied, making a left turn. "All this time.....and we all just abandoned him."

"Look we can deal with that later," Adam replied. "All I wanna do is just find him."

If anything happened to him........

Gino himself was feeling more than a little guilty. Adam's words had rang true in his head. John had been his friend and it had been him who introduced John to everyone else in the first place. As far as he was concerned, whatever happened was his fault.

I tried to struggle as John moved my body into the burlap sack. He had moved it to the edge of the pier, right where it led to a straight drop into the river. It was then that I got to see exactly what was in it. What looked to be a bunch of different workout weights and rocks, enough to....enough to keep a human body under water!

I was really struggling by that point, as I had figured out exactly how John wanted me to die.

"Stop moving around!" John exclaimed. "That'll make this thing a whole lot easier."

No way was I going to just let him kill me. But with no one around and no one coming for me, I knew that I'd eventually tire, and lose.

I continued my struggling but John had managed to get me inside the bag. I felt him tying it shut so that I couldn't escape. I also felt him trying to roll me off the ledge. I had felt my body fall, but then get caught on something.

"Shit!" John exclaimed, working to free the bag from the nails it had gotten stuck on.

He worked feverishly for a few minuted until he almost had it.

That was until....

"John!" Gino exclaimed.

John turned around so suddenly that he had bumped into the now free sack, knocking it over the ledge.

Adam Alex and Gino rushed over to John, ready to beat his ass.

But I, didn't see any of that. Because I had felt my body hit the river water.

I felt myself sinking. Deeper and deeper. And I felt myself go numb, not feeling anything anymore....................

A/N

Well thats it. The end of the John saga. And of course in my world (which is gay soap opera world) this would also be the end of the first season.(hence the really big cliffhanger, lol)

I haven't decided if I should take a little break or not. It would certainly make things more dramatic if I did leave you all with this cliffhanger (make no mistake, it is a cliffhanger, this story is far from being over) What do you think?

Of course, you could also spend some time checking out some other great stories that I highly recommend

The Log Way by Dominic Luka under the 'High School' section of Nifty

Nothing Worth Having is Ever Easy by Delerium Enigmias under the 'High School' section

and my favorite of all her wonderful stories stories 'Around My Way' by Madison A. under the 'High School' and 'Interracial' sections.

Comments? Questions? Complaints? Send them to crossingboi2004@yahoo.com

I always reply.

Copyright 2005