Disclaimer: I don't know BSB or anyone connected to them in anyway. I don't know their sexual preferences, this is just a story. I made it all up in my own little twisted world. Well, it's not that twisted but that's not the point.
Warning: I don't know where this is going, or what will happen. I've had this story on my mind for the past couple of months. There may be sex, but if there is it won't be in the first chapter. So if that's what you're looking for you might want to look in another place. Now there is one major super natural kick in this, it deals with Angels. I know first Sryin's, then Ghosts, then Elf's, and so on but I can't help it, really I can't. :)
Authors Note: Well I'm back and my BSB kick, and I've left for other bands alone. Now that most likely won't last for long so don't get your hopes up. If you have time and like this story check out some of my other stories. I'll leave a small list at the end of this chapter. I don't have an editor anymore, so most likely there will be a few mistakes. I would also like to add that if you have the time to please e-mail me. I love feed back and in some ways it helps get the next chapter out. Ok I'm going to explain my symbols and my way of writing. I write in the first person point of view, so to tell the story better I switch characters. I use these *** to do that and I also use those symbols to start off the chapter. I will put the name of the characters name in between the symbols when I start a chapter. When I change the character in the middle of the chapter or any part of the chapter the name will be at the end of the symbols. As of right now those are the only symbols I use. If I add more symbols I will explain, now on with the story I hope you enjoy it.
Loki
I turned around and moved toward Brian, he looked a little shaky. The dark haired man was already running toward his car. I smiled to myself and moved to Brian's side he looked ashamed.
"I'm sorry that I kept my identity from you, but it had to be this way." He looked up slightly and nodded, still he wouldn't look me in the eyes. I pulled my wings back in and picked up my shirt. After I pulled it over my head I took Brian's hand and walked him onto the bus. I helped him to sit down, then I sat down right across from him.
"You have nothing to be ashamed of, none this was your fault. You were only trying to help your fellow band mates. He used your love for them against you, he shouldn't have done that. I know that you still think you have reasons to be ashamed, but you don't. Your lifestyle is just that, your lifestyle there is nothing for you to be ashamed of." He looked up at me still doubting my words, it was understandable.
"Walk with me, I would like to show you something." He simply nodded and followed me to the back of the building. I took my shirt off once again, then released my wings again.
"I'm going to pick you up, and fly to the roof." He nodded slowly and stepped up closer to me, I then picked him up. I flew straight up to the top of the hotel, Brain had pressed his face into my chest.
Once I set foot on the roof I slowly sat Brian back on his feet. I flew back down and picked the shirt up off the ground without landing. Seconds later I was back on the roof, where I took my pants off. I placed the clothing back into the bag and got dressed in my clothing after I had pulled my wings back in. Brian hadn't taken his eyes off me yet, but that was ok I liked the attenion.
"Look toward the sun and tell me what you see." Brian looked toward the sun for a few minutes.
"I just see the sun, nothing more nothing less, am I supposed to see something?" I smiled to myself, now if he could only understand what I was about to tell him.
"You're seeing what you should see, but there more in this than a simple image. The sun is just that, and does what it pleases and doesn't worry about anything. The sun is just that and it can be nothing more nothing less. Brian you are who you are, you shouldn't try to be someone else. Where there is love there is his grace, I hope that someday you understand that. If you follow your heart you can't go wrong, remember that. There's a door over there, use it to get back to your friends. I must leave now, there are many things I have to do." I let my wings flow outward, then I picked up the bag. I flew straight up into the sky and continued to head upward until I was beyond the clouds. I turned and looked back down on Brian, I could see him clearly but he could only look upward.
I watched the tears fall from his eyes, then his lips moved slowly. He slowly turned and walked toward the door, after he entered the hotel I went back to the roof of the hotel. I had this strange feeling in my chest, it was something I had never felt before. I didn't know if Brian would be all right just yet. I felt that I needed to watch over him more closely than I had before. He was still in danger, he still needed my help, well that's what my heart told me. I had to be sure of his safety, and I truly didn't know why it had meant so much to me. I had this feeling he was going to tell his fellow band mates soon, and he would need me then. It wasn't that they would react badly, but I just wanted to make sure. Besides, he wasn't the only one keeping that secret, but he was the only one that thought it was going to cost him his soul. I couldn't let my presence be known until it was needed. If it wasn't needed I could simply leave without further letting anyone know I had been there. I lifted off the ground and traveled back to the arena as fast as I could. I dropped the clothing off and rushed back to the hotel roof, I had to be there before they left. I knew that I had a lot of time, but since I had revealed myself things might have changed. I was glad that I had rushed back to the hotel, the bus was leaving.
I took to flying higher into the sky and looking down on the bus. The area it was in had far to many people in it for me to simply land on the bus. I had to wait until it had at least cleared the city before I could land. Once the bus was thirty miles out side of the city it pulled over to a rest stop. I descended until I was just above the rest rooms in which the guys were using. I then followed Brian to area that contained food, and for the first time I hungered. I didn't understand the feeling so I pushed it away and continued to watch him. He then walked a little away from everything and looked upward toward the sky.
"I know you can hear me now, and I want to thank you for everything. I wanted to ask you if I would ever see you again. I just couldn't get it out in time, so now I wonder if I will. I pray that I do, so I can thank you face to face, I didn't tell the others the truth. I told them that you had something come up and you had to leave. So I hope that isn't going to get me in any trouble. I told them that I gave you my cell number and we were going to try and get together to play some B-ball. So if you ever want to come back, you have a reason. I'll cover for you, and I won't tell anyone what you really are, I promise." I was so tempted to show myself at that moment, but I didn't really know why.
I stayed out of site and then watched as the bus pulled away. I flew right above it and then I slowly touched down onto the top of the bus. I hoped that I hadn't made a sound, knowing myself as well as I did most likely I hadn't made a sound. I laid my body flat on the bus and listened to the people inside. They were talking about the concert that was coming up next. They talked about how much it would mean to them since it was Kevin and Brian's home town. I pressed my body on the bus a little tighter, then I pulled my wings back into my back. My clothing looked worse than had ever looked before, it was starting to get on my nerves. I knew I had to find some better clothing soon, then I could meet up with Brian again. I had to find a way to make some money, then I could buy some clothing. Then it hit me I could sing like the guys in the bus, and maybe I could get some money from it. Then I could go and buy myself some clothing that I could wear to meet with Brian. When the bus pulled into a hotel I watched them walk in, then get into an elevator. I took to the air and started looking for a place that looked like people could be drawn. Once there I took a seat on a bench, then I pulled my wings back in. I would have to wait until the sun came back up since the park was empty for the time being.
I sat there for hours watching cars pass by, some were cops. I had seen that in some cities cops would force people to leave the park. That hadn't happened yet and I hoped it wouldn't happen any time soon. I sat there all night and just watched the cars, so far none had stopped. When the sun started rising I smiled to myself and waited for the people to start walking through the park. It took close to four hours before the park started getting crowded. I decided that now was a good time to start singing so I did. In less then a few minutes I had my own crowd. The words were simple, I spoke of love and happiness. The people looked to be mesmerized by my voice and the song itself, when I stopped the money flowed. I had never seen people give so much, it was wonderful. I didn't know to much about money, but I could count that I had close to a hundred bills. I looked at the numbers, some of them had twenties on them. I was highly pleased with myself, and the people. I thanked all of them for the kindness, then I started looking for a clothing store. I walked for close to an hour, then I finally found a store with some nice clothing. I entered the store and looked around a little until I found some black pants and a black shirt. Then a clerk walked up to me, she looked upset for some reason.
I smiled at her and held out my hand, her whole body shook lightly. Then she waved her hand in my face as if to tell me to back off.
"Listen I don't really think you can pay for that, so why don't you just leave you bum." I was a little taken back, then I felt a small amount of anger. I pulled the money out from my pocket and held it out to her, still smiling.
"I think I have more than enough to buy this, you superficial insect." Her face changed quickly as she looked at the money.
"So if you wouldn't mind, I would like nothing more than to buy this and leave your little store." She turned around and walked toward the counter, I followed her. She took the pants and shirt and put them through the register.
"That will be forty-five sixty please, and I'm sorry I was so harsh toward you." I looked at the money and pulled three of the twenties out and handed it to her.
"Don't be, it is who you are, and you can't change that. Maybe in time you'll learn to be a little more open to people. Because if you don't, you'll find yourself sitting in a very warm place, that isn't to nice." I took my clothing and left, I didn't worry about getting any change. I took the rest of the money and gave it to a man sleeping on the street. I then took my old clothing off and sat it aside. I made two long cuts in the back of the shirt.
I had to make sure I could use my wings at any time, and since it was my clothing there wasn't a problem with that. I waited until the sun started setting, then I took the skies, hoping I wouldn't be spotted. I didn't really have to worry about air planes trying to chase me down. To their machines I was just a bird flying around, but I did have to worry about people seeing me. So I went as high as I could then started looking for the hotel, when I found it I landed on the roof. I entered the hotel and looked out every door on every floor. When I found guards standing just outside the door I knew I had found the right place. I ran back up to the top of the hotel and slowly flew down to the floor I had seen the guard. I looked in every window until I found Brian rushing around his room trying to get dressed. He looked so cute rushing around in his underwear, then he moved to the door. I went back to the top of the hotel and sat down, something was happening to my body. I felt strange and the lower part of my body was tingling slightly. I tried to shake the feeling off, but it just wouldn't go away. When I saw the bus pulling out of the hotel I followed it. Twenty minutes later it pulled into another arena, I touched down in the back of the building.
I pulled my wings in and moved to the shadows, hoping to stay unseen. I wanted for Brian to know that I was around, but not just yet. I wanted to wait until he needed some kind of help. I didn't want to just barge into his life, it wasn't the way I had lived my life. I had to wait until he needed me, then I would reveal myself once again. So I watched over him from a distance, always staying a step behind. This lasted for two months, I watched him and I noticed that he was starting to get depressed again. Still I kept my distance, he had to have his space to make his choices. I would be here if he needed me, but I couldn't interfere with his choices. My time finally came when they pulled off at a rest stop. It was a really nice area and the ocean was just over a cliff, it was really beautiful. Brian was pulling all of the guys together near the cliff, I had a really bad feeling about this. He looked scared, but there was something mixed with that fear, but what I didn't know. I moved closer staying behind the small amount of trees that kept the area shaded. I could feel what was about to happen, and instantly my wings tensed slightly. Brian had his reasons for moving so close to the cliff, and now I understood why. He was the only one near the edge as the others just looked on with confusion. When he turned around I could see the tears falling from his eyes.
He was taking deep breath and looking at each of his friends. Nick had tried to move closer to him but Brian had held his hand up.
"What I have to tell all of you is very important to me. It's very important to the band, and I should have said something years ago. I was afraid that if I did, you would kick me out of the band and replace me. So I lived a lie for as long as I could, and I had people help me. Leighanne has been a saint in so many ways, without her I wouldn't have made it this far. She isn't the only person that helped me so much. Loki gave me a lot of strength to do what I'm about to do, he gave me courage. He made me understand that who I am isn't something I'll go to hell for." He looked toward the ocean again then back to his friends.
"Now what I'm thinking may send me to hell but that's ok. I have to tell all of you that I'm gay, and that's not going to change in anyway. I know this could destroy the band, so I came up with something you could use. You see if the world ever found out it would hurt all of you more than me. So I've decided that since I can't live a normal life, I won't live one at all. This way the world just thinks this was all one big accident, but you could go on." With that said Brian ran and jumped off the cliff.
I was right behind him in less than a second, he was falling so quickly. I caught him one-tenth of a second before he hit the water. I pulled him into my arms and flew upward slowly, he looked shocked. I held him tightly as my foot touched back down on the ground, the others were still in shock, they hadn't moved.
"If you mean him harm you will have to go through me, and trust me you don't want to do that." Kevin had slowly started moving forward, but he didn't look angry.
"Brian, please don't ever do something like that again, I thought it was all over. I don't give a damn if your gay, you are who you are, and I love you for you." Brian was shaking slightly, and I found that I liked Kevin a lot. I was on the other hand confused by the fact Kevin hadn't said anything about my wings.
"As for you Loki, thank you for saving my cousin." I nodded slowly, but I knew I would pay for interfering again. I just hoped it wasn't as bad as last time, then again this wasn't so bad.
"Kevin have to totally missed the fact that this guy has wings, and can fly?" Kevin looked at Nick and smiled lightly.
"Well, not really at first I had thought it was amazing, but to be honest I had an idea. You see I went looking for Brian and Loki after they had left the hotel. I walked around the corner when Loki decided to fly Brian to the roof. Then he came flying back down and grabbed his shirt." I looked at Kevin with worry overriding everything in my being.
If he could have seen me than maybe others have too. I knew that I moved with amazing speed, almost at a blinding speed. Well, at least when I had no other choice I could move like this. That was when my body was consumed with pain, I had never felt pain before, not like this. Everything got dim and my hearing was fading so quickly, but I could still see and hear. It was just at a much lower rate, it was at a human rate. I couldn't move, I knew that I had fallen to the ground. I could feel hands moving over my body trying to lift me. I pulled my wings in hoping it would help in some way, it only took seconds. I took in a deep breath, then tried to regain some control over myself. My stomach felt like it was being stabbed over and over again. I didn't understand I hadn't eaten anything, or drank anything. I was now on something soft, and I could open my eyes but I felt so weak.
"What's wrong, why is this happening to you?" I had to take some time to pull my thoughts together.
"I interfered with your life, I'm not allowed to do that without paying a price." Brian looked heart broken, almost to the point of tears.
"Don't worry I've done this before, it's why I'm stuck on earth, I have a problem with not interfering. The first time they took my healing powers away, then sent me to earth. I guess now I'm becoming more human, do you have anything to eat?" I knew why my stomach was hurting now.
I was eating apple after apple, and it was helping slowly, the pain was fading. I still felt tired, so I knew I would need sleep soon. I wondered if I still had my wings, that and a few other things. I forced myself to stand and move toward the make shift kitchen on the bus. I found a knife and placed the blade against my arm, I closed my eyes and made a quick movement. I didn't feel any pain, so I opened my eyes to see that it hadn't even broken skin. The others were looking at me like I was nuts, then when they didn't see blood it was ok.
"I had to know if I still held any angelic gifts, it's good to see that I do." I couldn't let my wings flow outward, the bus was way to small.
"So you're an angel, or you use to be right?" I nodded, and Nick had made the correct statement, since I no longer knew if I was. I touched Nick's fore head quickly and tried to look into his mind, I couldn't. Another gift was gone, but I could live without it, I guessed.
"Sorry just checking something else out, it's gone." I moved back to the couch and laid down, it felt a lot better to just lay down. I slipped away into a deep sleep, it was peaceful and filled with wonderful thoughts. I didn't need to dream of wonderful things, I had lived in the most wonderful place. So my thoughts were like dreams in a way, filled with wonders most waited their whole lives for. I had seen the best and the worst this world had to offer, and I feared none of it.
I did on the other hand fear for the human race itself, and it's home. The human race was destroying the world they were given. I myself didn't know how long it would continue to support them. Then you had the other beings that wished the human race more harm than any other. The demons, the fallen angels still walked the earth at times with nothing to stop them. It was a given that they weren't powerful on this plain, but that didn't mean they couldn't harm people. Most of the time they would try to trick humans out of their souls. I had interfered more than once with that little act, but I never got in any trouble for it. Now I was among the human race, and the fallen angels, I worried about my life. While nothing human made would ever end my life, something a fallen angel made could end my existence. It was the same with weapons that an angelic being created. We could attack them and take them out of existence as well, it was something both races tried to avoid. Now that didn't mean they wouldn't strike us down given the chance. Now that I was on earth and almost powerless I would become a target. I could still fly into the skies, or so I hoped, if I couldn't than I was a sitting duck. I pushed all of those thoughts out of my mind and tried to rest while I had time to do so.
*****Brian
I looked down on Loki as he slept, he looked so peaceful. He had saved my life today, and given my life back a short time ago. Now he was starting to pay for everything he had done to help me. An angel that was now becoming human because he couldn't stop himself from helping people. He couldn't stop himself from helping me, and I wondered why I was so special. There was no doubt that I had always had faith in god, and I think everyone in the world knew that much. Still it didn't mean I should get special treatmeant, or be saved by an angel. I was starting to wonder if there was even a small chance that I could talk him into going out on a date with me. He had said that there was nothing wrong with me in any way. So maybe, just maybe he wouldn't mind being my boyfriend. Then again he may not have that ability just yet, so I decided that I should wait. Give myself and Loki time to get use to everything that had and was taking place now.
"Brian, would you please lay down beside me, I'm not use to sleeping. I think it would make it easier if I knew you were here with me." I laid down beside him, and I don't think my heart could have beat any faster.
"Would you mind holding me while I slept, I know it's a lot to ask?" I stopped him by wrapping my arms around his lower body. I listened as his breathing started to even out again, and felt his body push against mine.
It was like heaven, and had to be the most peaceful rest I had ever had. When I finally woke up the next morning I found many eyes on me and Loki. Loki was starting to wake up as the guys decided it was time to leave us be.
"Brian, could I ask you a strange question, I mean well it's not strange to me, but to you it might be." I was trying to find my voice, so I just nodded slowly hoping he felt it.
"You see there's this problem I'm having, and I don't really know what to do about it. Apart of my lower body is really hard and there's a small amount of pain." I didn't even think of laughing as I pulled back and helped Loki out of the bed.
"I believe you have to use the rest room, if you want I can help you." Loki nodded and followed me to the restroom where I told him what to do step by step. Not that there were many steps but I wanted to make sure everything was clear. I turned my back to him as he started taking a leak. When he was done I told him to wash his hands in the sank.
"I'm done now you can turn around, and thank you for helping me." When I turned around I found that Loki's pants were still around his ankles and he wasn't limp just yet. I had to take deep breaths to keep myself from doing anything that I shouldn't.
"You forgot to pull your pants back up, maybe you should do that now." He bent down and pulled his pants back up, then buttoned them and zipped them.
I found myself in a daze while the bus pulled into the parking lot of the hotel. I couldn't keep my eyes off of Loki, and I had to keep myself from following him around. He was talking with the others while he stuffed his face with food and juice.
"You know I never knew I was missing out on so much. This stuff is wonderful, and the different flavors are amazing." Nick was trying his best not to laugh, while the others looked on with smiles. Loki didn't seem to really notice anything that was going on, he just continued to eat.
"Come on guys off the bus and hurry before we get spotted, I said move your asses." I looked at Eric out newest PR agent, he was a nice guy until you pissed him off. Everyone but Loki stood up to leave, he didn't look like he was going to move until he finished eatting. Eric walked over to him, seeing him for the first time and smiled lightly at him.
"I don't really know who you are, but you seem to be a guest so I'll ask you nicely to follow me." Loki looked up at him and smiled bright before swallowing another bite of the eggs.
"I'm Loki, and it's nice to meet you Eric, I've heard so much about you. Could you please just give me say, another minute to finish this. Then I would be more than happy to follow you into the hotel." Eric looked at me and shook his head in amazment then slowly turned back to Loki.
"Ok, I tried being nice, so now let me try something a little more rude. Get your ass up and get off the bus, or I will carry you off the bus." Loki looked up at Eric and laughed lightly as he took his last bite of the eggs. He stood up and brushed his clothing off and started walking.
"You know kindness is a really big plus in the big book, you should look into it." Eric looked more dumbfounded than ever before, so he just walked off the bus. I followed shortly after grapping my bag and books, no need to have to come back later. Loki was standing just outside of the hotel, he looked confused and lost. He slowly looked over to me, then walked into the hotel. I ran up behind him and tapped him on his shoulder.
"You look a little sad, is there anything wrong Loki?" He looked at me and then back to the front desk.
"It's just that's a little hard to remember somethings that I should know. I use to always have a path to heaven in my mind so I would never get lost when I came to earth. Even if I couldn't return I always knew how to get there, now it's gone. There are other things that I'm finding I don't know anything about, that I use to know. I'm starting to understand it now, and it's really scaring me. I learned almost everything I know from one human. Now that human is dead and everything I learned from him is fading from my mind. I still know everything about you and the others, but if you or the others ever die I'll be lost forever."
"I use to know what a shower was, and how to take a bath. Since last night those memories have faded away. I never really looked into that part of your mind, I didn't need to know it then. Now I can't look into anyones mind and I find that I can't remember certain things. I can't even remember what sex is, well I know what it is,but not how to do it. I use to know how to do it, my human told me, but now it's all blank. Then add the problem of being able to feel everything like a normal human and I can't just fly off. From what I can tell I still have my wings, only I can't really use them. As you know the higher up you go the colder it gets. Normally that wouldn't be a problem since I couldn't feel everything, now I can. Like when I touch your arm now, I don't see your thoughts, I just feel how warm your skin is. I just don't know what to do anymore, everything's gotten so confusing. My thoughts and feelings are no longer dense, I feel things I never thought I really could. Things that humans but angels aren't allowed to feel because it would get in the way. It's one thing to love a human, it's another to fall in love with a human." His last words dug into my mind so quickly it almost made me dizzy. He looked away again and then moved away following Nick. All the guys liked Loki and he had a place in their hearts because of his past actions.
Even knowing he would pay a price he had saved my life. That was enough for the guys to take him under their wing and watch over him. In some ways he was now like a child which made me want to keep my distance. Well, not stay away from him, just try to stop thinking about him in other ways. I had to give him to time to find himself and understand the world again. It didn't matter how long that would take, for him I believe I could wait forever. There was this little fact that I was still somewhat recovering what had happened months before. After pulling myself out of my thoughts long enough to get to the hotel room I found that Loki wasn't in my room. I shrugged my shoulders knowing I shouldn't have excepted it. Kevin had most likely gotten him a room to himself since he was now Kevin's project. Kevin had a really hard time leaving things the way they were. So he could do everything in his power to help Loki, even if Loki didn't really need or want it. It was cool cause I knew that Kevin wouldn't do anything that could hurt him in anyway. Nick was knocking on my door like he always did, like a little kid.
"Hey Bri, why don't you come help me teach Loki how to swim." I didn't remember buying him and swimming trunks. I looked at Nick who had this really wild smile as he turned and walked away.
To Be Continued ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Other stories that I've written: Falling, The Sryin, The Lost, Broken, It's A Wonderful Life, Gemini, Ghost, Where You Are, Libra, Simple Twist Of Fate, Double Take, and The Last Kiss Good Night.