An American Dream
I always used to consider myself pretty normal. Wanting to get married to the right woman and having kids a decent job, a nice house and other things like that. I almost have that with a few changes. Here is my story on how it happened.
It all started about 10 years ago, in 1999. There was a hobby of mine that seems really strange now. I used to go out the bridal sites and download the pictures of the women in the gowns. I don't know why that would keep my interest, but it did. While going through my collection one day, there was this one that stood out. For no particular reason, this photo caught my eye. I just stared at it for a few minutes. The model was a very attractive young woman, and the gown was simplistically nice. Not really all that remarkable, yet I could stop staring at it.
Then it happened. As off in the distance, I heard someone calling out instructions like "Good! Now turn! More...More....GOOD! Now look over your left shoulder. Not quite so much. There, hold that!" I was also feeling a bit of a pulling and colors and light seemed to going by in a blur. I shook my head to clear it, and the voices and blurring stopped. "Wow! What a trip", I thought to myself.
As I reached for the mouse, I noticed something. The nails on my right hand were longer and perfectly manicured, about 1/2 an inch from my fingertip. I also noticed they had a translucent purple polish on them. This gave my an instant woody, until it sunk in that these were my hands (oh, yes! The left hand nails were done in the same way). I went upstairs to get some nail polish remover (it works great for when I go insect hunting to add to my collection, and infinitely safer than cyanide). I tried to get the polish off, but was not able to even dissolve any of the acetate. I then took a nail clipper and tried to trim the nails back to their masculine length. The nail would not cut. That's when I noticed my hands were less the large hands of a man, but thinner and more slender like a woman's. Though, they were not completely feminized.
A quick check of the rest of my body revealed nothing else was amiss. "Well, this is strange. I will have to check this out later", I said out loud to no one in particular. Going back downstairs, I started mulling the happenings over. The only thing I could think of is it had to something to do with the picture I was looking at. Well, there is only one way to test that theory. The photo was still on the screen, and I started to look at it again. Again, the far off instructions started to filter through. Just as the blurred colors started up, I heard a knock at my door. Snapping to the present, I realized the knocking was indeed someone at my door. Jumping up and rushing to the back door, it was my mom.
"What...uh....Hi, Mom. What brings you here?"
"I wanted to take a dip in your pool. You shaved your beard?"
"Uuuhhh, no?"
"Yes you did", she said with a hint indigence. "That's not something you can hide. Nor is shaving your arms and doing your nails. Is there something you want to tell me?"
A look of total shock came across my face. I had to get rid of her fast. "I just shocked the pool 4 hours ago. It can't be used for another 4."
"How about some lunch then."
"No, I have too much to do here. Thanks anyway."
"Okay. You do know that I am here if you want to talk about anything."
"I'm fine, Mom. See you later", I said, hoping this would terminate the conversation and I could get back to my experimenting.
"Bye." She turned and hesitated, but got in her car and left. She was right though, my beard was gone. Also, my hair was slightly longer. I went into the bathroom and there were some more subtle changes. Like my pants seemed longer, and hips seemed wider. I thought in for a penny in for a pound. Might as well let whatever is going on take its course. I have no idea where this was coming from. I never had any of these urges before. What was happening?
When I got back to the computer, things seemed to happen even before I started looking at the picture. The directions were coming in cleared and the blurring was less. Suddenly, I was in a photographer's studio with him directing the shots and me following those directions as if was what I was supposed to do.
"That's it! Pull the veil a little further out."
As I fanned the veil out, I felt hair down the back of me neck, and across my bare shoulders. I looked down and noticed I was wearing the wedding gown in the picture. I was wearing heels, but I was wearing them like I had worn them all my life. I felt the new sensation of having breasts and a vagina.
"Look up please, Catherine."
As I look up, I catch a glimpse of myself in a mirror on a makeup table. "My God! I'm a her.... I'm HER", I exclaimed softly to myself.
"PERFECT! I love the look", exclaimed David. With that, a bunch of flashes went off in rapid succession. How in the world did I know the photographer's name?
Anyway, the shoot lasted about another hour. I really didn't give what had happened too much more thought. It was like I was working on autopilot, and was concentrating on my job. However, once it was over, and I was getting my purse and about leave the studio, Dave came over and asked if I
wanted to get some coffee. I declined, as I had to get dinner started. My boyfriend was coming over and I promised a real home cooked meal. This triggered something in my mind. As of a few hours ago, I was a slightly overweight heterosexual 32-year-old male, admiring an attractive young lady modeling a wedding dress. Now I was that 23-year-old. The thing is how do I have the knowledge of Catherine as if I had been born her? Also, how come I still remember who I was? Is there any way for me to get back? And where is the "real" Catherine?
One major thing that took me by surprise was how short I was. I thought models were all 5'10" at least, but I couldn't be over 5'6". I mean I am wearing 2" heels and still have to look up to people. It was really strange having this duality. The part of me that was the old me was getting excited because I was gaining carnal knowledge of this lovely woman, and the new me was getting excited because I was her. I knew I was attractive. If it weren't for the fact that there was a part of me who knew how to be me, I would still be back at the studio exploring my new assets.
It was a very unique feeling to have breasts, and to have them encased in a bra. It felt weird wearing panties and not having an extra appendage hanging between my legs. It felt like I had a certain freedom. It was strange that I could be wearing a dress much less be out in public and have guys check my ass and legs and breasts, and like them. It put a smile on my face each time a guy would walk by and try to check me out discretely. I had no idea women could even tell when I would do it as my old self.
My old self. What of my house? Will my mom come back later today to find no one home, but the house open? I mean I am walking two blocks in New York City to grab a subway home, but my other home is in Connecticut.
Other than my musings, the ride to my apartment on West 57th was uneventful. Some guy let me have his seat on the train. I don't know if it was because I was Catherine or if he was just being nice, but it was sweet just the same. I got the mail and headed to my apartment. When I got home, there were a couple of messages waiting. One was from Dave saying he forgot to give me the shoot schedule for next week, and the other was from Peter, my boyfriend saying he would be here at 7:00. When I heard his voice, I started to get a little wet between my legs. Apparently I really liked this guy.
Then it hit me. Why don't I call my house in Connecticut? At worse, I will be leaving myself a message. I dialed my number and someone with my voice picked up.
"Hello?" came the voice from the other end.
"Mr. Keating?"
"Yes."
Maybe the original Catherine had switch places with me. "This may sound weird, but please hear me out. Have you had the feeling like you have another life? Almost like a duality."
"No. And you are right in that does sound weird. Is there something I can help you with?"
I had to see if I could draw this person out, and see if he was having the same thing happening as to me. "My name is Catherine and up to about 2 1/2 hours ago I thought I was you." That really didn't sound good, but hopefully this will draw Catherine out if she was I.
"Is this some kind of joke? If not, I suggest you forget this number, and if so, forget this number and seek some counseling." With that, the phone went dead.
Well, if it was Catherine, she could be just in shock, and she knows her number if she wants to talk. When I hung up the phone, it rang. "Hello?"
"Catherine! How'd the shoot go?"
"Hi, Mom. It went really well. Dave wants me to come back next week for another shoot. He really does good work."
"A brother/sister fashion team. I am so proud of you two!"
"I don't know how much longer I will do this, though. Listen, can I call later? Pete is coming over for supper."
"Okay, what are you fixing?" Jeezch! The woman doesn't know when to hang up.
I continued to talk to my mom (or rather Catherine's mom) while fixing dinner. It was weird.
I really called my parents when I was my old self, and when I did, it was never as long as I talked with this woman. And the amazing part was the conversation came easy.
At 6:00, I finally hung up with my new mom, and had fixed a really nice dinner during the conversation. As the vegetables were simmering, I went to my room and got ready for Pete. What to
wear? Catherine seemed to do well, as there were lots of really nice cloths in my closet. I my mind, as I was looking through the cloths, several seemed to start saying "Ooooo! Pick ME!" Not having a woman's sense of style before, I was satisfied to go back into autopilot mode and just learn from the previous Catherine's experience. This seemed to blur the line more of who I was, and who I am now.
I ended picking out a black one-piece seethe dress, scoop neckline, black lace bra and panties, nude pantyhose, and 3" flat black pumps. Looking in the mirror at my makeup table, I wish my hair was longer, but it was long enough to put it and a sweep and pin behind head. That looked pretty sophisticated. A minimal amount of eye makeup, a little bit of rouge on the cheeks, and some wine colored lipstick to finish things off. I think I'll go with some diamond studs for earrings, and the herringbone gold necklace. A little Obsession behind the ears, along the neck, and behind the knees. I thought to myself, "Girl, you are beautiful!"
Then the doorbell rang. With a certain amount of excitement and trepidation, I went to answer the
door. There was Pete. He had a nice swimmer's build, and wearing a light gray sports coat, white shirt and blue tie. Gray Dockers, and tennis shoes. As he looked me over, his jaw dropped.
"You look gorgeous!" I forgot all about what he was wearing, and put me arms around his neck and kissed him deeply. Then my former male self took over and was disgusted with what I had just done. But it was quickly beat down by my Catherine self, but not until I broke the kiss.
"Hello to you, too." Pete said quietly. Then, with a smile he said, "Can I come in, or are we going to continue putting a show on for your neighbors?"
I just smiled at him, and stared into those deep blue eyes. Pete started to move into my apartment, with me still hanging off his neck. When he closed the door, I put me feet down and released him. It seems like more than two weeks since he went on his business trip. I got the feeling Catherine really loved him before I became her.
"I brought you some roses." He said holding out a dozen long-stem roses.
"They'll make a great center piece, thank you." I took the roses, went into the kitchen and got
a glass vase out. A little bit of water, and flowers went in and on the table. "Would you like something to drink? It's going to be a few minutes until the bread is done."
"No, thanks. I'll just wait until dinner."
With that, he went to the couch and sat down. I did a quick check on everything, poured the wine, and went and sat next to him. "How was your trip?"
"Just a bunch of boring computer stuff."
My male self was suddenly alert. "Tell me about it."
"Okay, but don't say I didn't warn you." Pete went on to describe the trials and tribulations that he had to deal with putting in a new switching network. I leaned over pulling my legs under me, put my head on his shoulder and listened intently. He then put his arm around my shoulders, and I knew this is where I wanted to stay.
DING! "Dinner's ready." I unfolded myself and got up to start moving the food to the table. Pete came over and put his arms around my waist. Even with the 3" heels, the top of my head came just under his chin. I just stood there for a moment, swaying back and fort with Pete. I could feel the hard on he was getting. It added to my excitement to know that I could sexually stimulate him. I also had a slight repulsion, but that side of myself was getting quieter and quieter. "Honey, I have to get the dinner on the table." I said with a slight giggle.
"Oh, alright. I'll go wash up."
During dinner, he finished talk about his trip. He then asked about what I did for the past couple of weeks. I wanted to find out if he was genuinely interested, or just being polite. I started with a brief day-to-day account. I finally started to build it into a fantastic story how I will be traveling around the world doing peace core type of things during the day, and high fashion things during the night. He just looked at me, and started to laugh. I feigned hurt, but couldn't keep a straight face. We both started to laugh. I then went into how my bother was short some models because of the flu, and I ended up filling in for them. Pete was intently listening. Then he said it. "I love you."
I immediately went to cloud nine. He said it without me having to prompt him, say it first, or during sex. "I love you, too." That's when he did it. He got down on one knee, presented a ring, and proposed. Catherine said yes, but I was in a panic. I still wanted to get back to my old self and is the one proposing, not being proposed to. My Catherine self was just too strong at that point, and was over filled with joy as Pete slipped the ring on my left finger. We both stood up and started kissing.
As we kissed, he started to slip a hand down the front of my dress and massage my left breast. It felt wonderful, and electric. Every time he touched the nipple, I couldn't help put start grinding my hips against his, and feeling the raging hard on he was getting. My male self finally gained some of the control once more, but only enough to get Catherine to back off a bit.
Pete looked confused and said, "What's wrong?"
"Nothing. Everything is right. But I still don't want to go too far until we are married." My male self breathed a figurative sigh of relief.
"I understand. You want to do it the old fashion way."
"I hope you aren't mad. I just feel that if we can wait, the marriage will be stronger because we'll have built the relationship on more than just sex." This was how the former Catherine really felt, but I was happy to see this trait in her just the same. This will give me a chance to see if there is anyway to get back to my old self.
"I can see that logic. I thought we had built up past the lust stage. But you are the one I want to spend the rest of my life with, and well worth the wait. However, it is getting towards 11:30, and I have to go into the office tomorrow. I should be going."
"No you don't. Stay here tonight. On the couch."
"Okay. If you insist."
End part one. Author's note: In the next part, Catherine finds out the fate of her male self, and what happened to the original Catherine. It is going to take place a year later right before the wedding. If you like or hate this story, please send comments to ad_author@hotmail.com
An American Dream continued
"I have HAD it with you! If you cannot realize the hell you have but me through the past 3 months, what is it going to like when we are married? Maybe we shouldn't even have a wedding!"
"Catherine! You have been putting me through the same type of hell not agreeing to have sex with me. Damn your morels, damn your scruples, and damn you!" With that, Pete stormed out, making sure the door slammed shut with a satisfying THUD!
Perhaps I was being a bit prudish. However, 3 months ago I was a straight male, not a woman who models part time for her brother. Over the 3 months, I had gotten to know certain things about the original Catherine. Like how she felt the first time she got to wear pantyhose (first communion), the time she tried out for the cheerleading team and was just laughed at (she was very gawky in high school), and the satisfaction she felt when at her 5 year high school reunion, she showed the cheerleading captain the first place award from the national college cheerleading competition. Yet, even though I knew these experiences as if I had lived them, they were not mine. In addition, even though I had started to acclimate to the idea of being a woman, I retained the thoughts and feelings of my former male self. That is one of the reasons I have resisted sleeping with Pete.
Then there is original Catherine. I never did find out what happened to her. I called my house twice more, hoping to find out if she was living my life, but whoever was living my life seemed not willing to part with any information. It's getting to the point where I will have to give up on calling, as probably the next time the police will be called. I was startled out my musings by the phone. Gathering of what was left of my wits, I picked the receiver up after a few more rings.
"Hello?"
"What are you trying to do to me?"
"Ah, Mom? What are you talking about?"
"Pete came over here in such a rush, and was going on about you breaking off the engagement? I mean really, Catherine. You met nice guys all the time, but you won't let them ever get close. I thought it was going to be different with Pete. You said you really had fallen for him. Now, what I want you to do is..."
"MOTHER! You are really taking his side without hearing from me?" I was livid. Not only did Pete try to undermine my resolve by getting my, or rather Catherine's, mother involved, but she immediately takes his side. On top of that, she was going to tell me what to do. I mean after 24 years you would think that she could let go. Maybe I am a prude.
There was a long silence on the other end. "Well, young lady. I'm listening."
Calmed down a bit, I replied "The thing is he wanted to have sex after I have made it abundantly clear that it can wait to after the wedding. Because he got extremely upset with this, I started to question if we should even get married."
"Well, I am happy that you stuck to your principles, and I see a lot of your father's stubbornness in you. However, is this something to risk a wedding over?"
"I can't believe you can even ask that! We will have to talk about this later when cooler heads prevail!" I slammed the phone down with a resounding CLUNK. Fiercely, I started punching in my brother's (again it is Catherine's brother) phone number. With every tone, I just got angrier.
"Hello."
"David! Thank goodness you are home. Can I borrow your car for a little while?"
"Catherine? What's wrong?" I wish I had a brother like the one she did, or a sister for that matter.
"Nothing physically. I'll tell you more later. Right now, I just have to get out of the city for a few hours. Think some things out."
"Mom again?"
He knew her so well. "Yes."
"Okay. Just remember to put gas in it this time. Last time you borrow it, you drove to Buffalo and back."
"Yes, I will put gas in it. Thank you. I will come by your place in a half hour?" It takes 20 minutes by subway to get to his place from here.
"Okay. Do you want to talk about it at all?"
Very inquisitive sort, this David. "Not now. When I come home."
"You're not going to Buffalo or Toronto are you?" He asked teasing slightly.
"I don't know. I'm just going to drive. See you in a bit." I hung up the phone after he said good-bye. I got the distinct feeling the real Catherine became the woman she was in great part because of David, not their parents. There was no abuse or anything like that. More of an absent-t set of parents. Her father was not around because of business, and her mother was always being a socialite. Sometimes, I get the strong feeling that Mom only had kids because it was something that her friends were doing and she felt left out. That may have been true for David, at least. They had me because "two was a nice round number". What a horrid reason to have kids.
What's strange about the thought that I was deep in was the way the real Catherine felt. Alternatively, was it that this is the way I felt, and thus creating a false memory? Perhaps it was they way we both felt. Maybe I was losing myself and becoming the real Catherine. I just didn't know.
Well, here I am. At David's door, knocking.
"Come in, Cathy. I'm sorry. I know you don't like that too much." David said with genuine regret.
"David, please. You are about the only one I'll accept it from. Cathy just sounds so white trashish. Thank you again for the car." I said as I kissed him on the cheek.
"Well, just as long as you don't go on Springier. Here are the keys, and remember, don't drive angry." He handed the keys and returned the kiss on my cheek. I felt a sisterly love for him. So much that the anger I had 30 minutes ago had no place to reside. Yes, there was no doubt about it. Catherine was able to handle being an adult because of her brother.
I started the car and pulled away from the curb into the mainstream of traffic. Not really knowing where I was going, I started to drive, and thinking about the exchange with David. We had acted very close siblings, even though I had been his sister for the same about of time I had been a woman. Being an only child in my old self, I never understood the bond brothers and sisters shared. The only experience I've had was someone on the outside looking in, and not able to experience the love and companionship. That could be why Pete went to Mom instead of David to lament. He knew that she would put pressure on me with little coaxing. It seems almost like I was an embarrassment in Mom's social groups. Here I was playing in a very attractive 24 young woman and wasn't married yet. If he had gone to David, David would have probably thrown him out on his ear and told him not to come back.
Not really paying attention to my destination, just enough attention to keep from getting in to or causing an accident, I found myself in Hartford. Wow, driving for two hours, and it didn't even seem like that long. Well, since I was now in my old metro area, I decided to see if there was any activity in the train yard. That's where I'd go just to wind down and kill some time.
Pulling into the commuter lot off of Windsor Street, I noticed it was about half full. Not surprising even for being a mid-weekday. Yep, I was in luck. CSO was doing some switching in the yard. I nice way to just let the thoughts flow over you. Just wish I had a scanner.
After about a half hour of watching the crew move some boxcars and covered hoppers from one track to the track leading to East Hartford, I noticed a car had pulled in next to me a couple of slots down. The driver was alone and kept looking at me. Every time I looked in his direction, he would look away. It was somewhat creepy. However, I realized this is what I would do when I was a man. I would see an attractive woman and try to steal glances at her, hoping that I wouldn't be thought a creep. Also, not getting up the nerve to go over and say hello.
It then hit me, it was me! I mean it was my male self. Had it been so long that I had forgotten my car and what I looked like? I just kept staring, hopping he would look at me again, and maybe we could get a repot going with myself. Eventually he did look over. When our eyes met, there was a spark of recognition there.
Without speaking, I got the feeling that he would like me to follow him. He then started up his ca and left the lot. I followed. I lost him in the traffic on Windsor Street, but knew where he was going. I went over the bridge that spanned the train yard and pulled in to the Burger King lot on Jennings Road. Sure enough, there was his (my) car. I parked, got out and went inside.
I got in line behind him and tapped him on the shoulder. He turned around and smiled. "Hello. My name is ... "
"Dan Fordge. Hi, Dan. I'm Catherine Murphy."
He just stood there with the smile. "Um, Dan, you're next." I pointed to the open cashier. He turned around and started to order. As he was ordering, I took stock on what was happening. I was standing here in a nice white full skirt, 2" heels, pink blouse, and hair in a high pony tail, in an ordering line for Burger King a 100 miles from my host body's home, next to a guy who I was. What strange day.
I got up to the cashier and ordered a chicken sandwich and a small Diet Coke. As I reached for my purse, a hand stopped me. "I'll pick it up Catherine."
"You don't have to do that."
"I want to." There was Dan, again with the smile. I don't ever remember being that bold.
"Thank you."
We got our food and headed for a table. I noticed several guys eyeing me, and I almost got the feeling of them thinking, "What is she doing with that loser?" I didn't care. I found myself so to speak. Maybe now I can get some nagging questions answered.
"Earth to Catherine." I looked at him. "So, could you tell me how you knew my name? And where to find me?"
Well, that answers one question. The real Catherine and I didn't switch bodies. If we had, my male self would have recognized me for who I was. So, what happened to Catherine? And now that I was in Catherine's body, who's in mine? Will I ever be able to get back? Will I want to go back? Well, time to do some soul searching. "Dan, I have a confession to make. I was having a hard time with my mother and I went driving. I found myself in Hartford. I've always been able to think well with the distraction of trains in the background. I'll get to the reasons for than in a minute. Having you come in the lot at the time was coincidence - actually more than coincidence. Do you believe in providence? Don't answer that, I already know. You don't know what to think of it. You concede there may be such a thing, but the jury is still out on it. I also know that you are an only child, you own a house with a pool, and your parents live in Windsor."
I saw a look of panic hit his face. I got the feeling he wanted to leave.
"Before you go, I want to tell you something. You know who I am. You have seen me modeling wedding dresses for a website. All this information so far isn't too difficult obtain with a little research. What I am about to tell you is something only you yourself knows. That is that you have a problem completing something. You have a great fear that if you start something, and commit to it, you will be uprooted and have to start over.
"Now, do this one favor for me. Think back 9 months ago. You found my picture on the web. Your mother interrupted you while this strange experience was going on. You noticed certain changes happening. That is why I knew what your name was. I am you. Rather I was you."
As I was going through the description, something started to happen. I became more aware of his mind. Not as it was or how I remembered it, but as it is now. I could almost "see" it searching out looking for a connection.
This was strange because I could feel that Catherine never experienced this kind of sensation, and I know I never had. Nevertheless, it wasn't freighting. All there was was a sense of loneliness. Then it was gone.
Dan just stared at me. After what seemed a day he said, "I've always felt like I lost something after my mom left. So if you are me, or were me, who am I?"
"I have a theory. I think you and I were the same person. I was part of you. After you went back downstairs, I was "torn" away, and inserted in place of Catherine. I have no idea where she is now. I thought she might be in your body. I tried calling to find out."
"That was you? It makes sense now. I couldn't figure out who this crazy woman was calling all the time."
"Yes, well. Sorry about that. Nonetheless, the real Catherine is still missing. Oh my! Look at the time. I have to get David's car back to New York."
He looked at the diamond on my ring finger. "David is...?"
"My brother." I said without thinking about it.
"Well, if all is all as you say, then you should say Catherine's brother." He said with a rye smile. Ah, yes, my sly often too subtle sense of humor.
I started to chuckle. "You are so right. Nine months in this body and I think of Catherine as me most times. It is weird with this dual existence."
"Confusing, I assume."
I spent another half hour talking with myself and really had to get back to New York. I gave Dan my number and address. I opened the door, now let's see if I'll walk in.
On the way home, I made up my mind and decided to break off the engagement with Pete. He was definitely not the man I wanted to spend my life with. Listen to me. I'm thinking as if I was Catherine and had a right to mess up her life. I then came up with the realization that I didn't want to go back to being my old self. If Catherine came back, I wouldn't feel right in keeping her from her body, but I have become someone different from when I was part of Dan. That bridge will be crossed in time, though.
When I dropped the car off, David remarked that my mood had markedly improved. I talked to him about what led up to me taking the drive, and how it helped me solve a couple of problems. "I'm breaking the engagement off. Pete just isn't the right one."
"Mom is going to go insane."
"I know. You can bet Pete will go straight to her when I give the ring back. I may need your help when that happens."
"You know I'll be there for you."
"Thank you. I love you." I really did. I started to cry. I didn't want David to have to try to pry any more information out, so I said a quick good-by and left. I was crying because of the love David felt for his sister, and for what I had to do.
I went to over to Pete's to return the ring. I washed up and touched up my makeup before going over though. I knocked on the door. No answer. I used my key and found him not home. This was good. I whipped up a quick supper - for one. Just as I was setting the plate out in waltzed Pete.
"I see you've come to your senses. You didn't need to make dinner though."
If he only knew what thin ice he was trending on. "I am returning your ring. The engagement is off! Good-by Pete." I took the ring off my finger. In one last act of defiance, I tossed it to him. I then calmly walked out the door. As I walked out of his building, it was so liberating!
"YOU BITCH! YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A TEASE! YOU WILL NEVER HAVE IT SO GOOD AS IF YOU STAYED WITH ME! THIS ISN'T OVER, BITCH!"
Ha, his insults and barbs just bounce off me. He could call me any name in the book, but nothing would be able to destroy my mood. I didn't even take the subway I was so giddy.
When I got home, there were two messages on the machine and Mom was pacing up and down, sipping wine. Knowing what was on her mind, I ignored her and went to play my messages.
"Don't TOUCH that machine. I have a few things to say." she fumed.
"I'm sure you do."
"Watch your mouth! How dare you screw this up? Do you know the kind of pressure I get from my friends? All their daughters are married and have kids. You want me to be the laughing stock of the island? Why did you break off the engagement? People are talking, saying you have an affinity for the ladies. Well, what do you have to say for yourself?" If looks could kill, I'd be the late Catherine Murphy.
I never would let anyone talk to me that way when I was my old male self. "Now you see here! All you seemed to worry about is how it appears to your friends. Have you ever considered that I am not your Barbie Doll? I have a life, feelings, and someone who has never known what it's like to have a parent support her."
"Are you saying I'm not a good mother? Who gave you birth? Who..."
"Giving birth is not mothering! I know you love me in your own way, but it is not the lovingness from a parent. David raised me. He's the one who helped shape my outlook of the world. The one who taught me how to face the world. He is..." I had a fleeting feeling of how I got to be Catherine. Then it was gone. I continued more softly and calmly, "...was more of a parent to me than you or Dad. It is because of him, I've been able to keep my sanity and my principles. Pete had no regard to who I was or am. That is why I broke off the engagement. By the way, I am not a lesbian."
What was that? Did I see a tear in her eye? Did I finally get it through to her that I am a person?
"You have no idea how you have hurt me. This has been building for a long time. I have to go now, but we must talk about it later." With that, she got her coat, and dash out the door. All I could do is look dumbfounded in her wake.
The close of the door snapped me out of it, and I remembered there were a couple of messages. The first one was from Dan. He wanted to come to New York and talk some more. I don't know if he actually fully believed what happened, but the company would be welcome nonetheless. The other message was from David warning me that Mom was on her way over. Well, too late for that one. I called Dan, and arranged to meet him in a restaurant in Rockefeller Center tomorrow.
During the night, my mind started turning over things. Some things like how I now thought myself as Catherine, not as someone who inhabits her body. It was more than that. Who she was is now who I am. As far as my former Dan-self, he was his own separate person. So much so, I came to the realization that reintegration would not be possible, nor desired. I also realized that Catherine was a much stronger person than she ever thought she was.
I woke up and felt more refreshed than ever. I had an uneventful day at the shoot with David. I sensed he didn't want to work, but rather talk about and find out what happened with Mom last night. I promised to tell all later, but I was in too good of a mood to not get it on film.
When we broke for lunch, I went to the restraint where I told Dan to meet me. He was there, looking a little oppressive. It then hit me like a ton of bricks. I loved him. Why not, I was once him. However, I had a strong desire to have a relationship with this man; a deep, meaningful relationship.
As I approached, Dan caught site of me and his face showed relief. I knew he was afraid that I wouldn't show up. It felt powerful to be able to affect someone that way. However, this is someone whom I did not want to play mind games. I smiled and gave him a big hug. It was nice like there was some electricity between us. The feelings I had toward this man transcended the shared history we once had. I wanted to be with him. I just hope he feels or will be interested in feeling the same towards me.
We talked for over an hour, barley touching our food. Because of this, we got the food packed up and I invited him to come to the afternoon shoot with me. Dan accepted seeing as how the trip to the city was the only thing he had planned for today. When we got back to David's studio, I introduced the two. If he passed muster with David, he was defiantly a person worth getting to know as he was now. When Dan left, David just smiled an approving smile. Life was just getting better and better.
A couple of months later, Dan and I had started to see each other more and more. Mom didn't like him as much as she liked Pete, only because he didn't come from money. Even though she had started to see me more as a daughter rather than a status symbol, old habits die-hard. Dad didn't seem to take much notice until we got a little more serious. The best part of this, even though we were separate people now, we became almost inseparable.
Three months later, Dan surprised me with a ring. I accepted of course. I even moved up to the Hartford area to be closer to him, and found a job as a costumer service rep. Every month, I would work for David modeling whatever he had going on as a client at the time. Dan and I were married another 4 months later. I wore the dress that had started the whole thing a year and a half ago.
On our wedding night, I finally found out what it was like to have sex as a woman. What heights I reached just in anticipation. As Dan penetrated me, the flash of inspiration I had when arguing with Mom so many months ago came back. This time, it stayed, and everything fell into place. What happened was that the original Catherine was sensing impending emotional doom, didn't know if she would be able to handle it.
Her mind reached out and wanted to find someone who had a strong ideal, and almost an unfailing strength of character. She didn't even realize this was happening. I made a connection with her when I concentrated on her picture. Her mind sort of ripped a portion off and added it to herself. However, because of the certain unknown factors, she took part of my consensus as well. That is why I was seeing myself as a separate person inhabiting her body. Once I had become acclimated, and the two entities learned how to work and integrate, that is when I no longer saw myself as anyone other than Catherine.
Just as I was reaching climax, that feeling that Dan's mind was reaching out, searching for something. I gently touched it with my consensus, and there was an immediate feeling of oneness. Like I was completing him, and he was completing me. This made the orgasm even more intense. I could tell Dan was feeling it, too.
After we were done, both exhausted, the feeling started fade. In 10 minutes, Dan was ready, and we had sex again and again. Each time the feeling of oneness came back, and ceased after the intercourse was complete. This is the exact moment I knew this was the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I wanted to have a family with him. What was more, is I knew he felt the same about me.
********************************************************************* Author's note: This story (part 1 and 2) is something that took a lot more time than I had intended to spend on, but it was worth it. I wrote this story for me, and thus have not included a lot of graphic sexual detail.
After the first part was out, I got some responses asking for more sex. I find stories concentrating on the sex just gets be the same thing with little changing except the transformation and the character names. My intent here was to provide a story based on the character instead.
If you wish to reach me, you can email me at: ad_author@hotmail.com, I hope you enjoy this story as much as I did writing it.