Alice and Kay

Chapter 2

Alice was sitting in the train that was taking her to her hometown; finally after two long and tear full years she was going back, she was going to find Kay even if it was the last thing she ever did. In her mind the ugly scenes of the fights with her parents kept playing like a scratched DVD.

"You are sick! How can you like a girl?" Her mom screams were engraved in her memory and no matter how much time would go by those words still hurt too much. Her dad disapproved also, but he didn't quarrel with her so much, he was in total and complete denial even trying to hook her up with boys.

Somehow her parents had come up with the crazy idea that by sending her off to study far away they would cure her from her "disease" she always thought her mom was understanding and often felt proud of having such a cool mom, so modern, but when she met this side of her she got disappointed.

Poor Kay she could almost imagine her anguish, the first day of school and Alice was nowhere to be seen, she had probably gone back with her dad and had followed her old plans to become a lawyer while working and helping her dad out at the shop.

When she looked out of the window she started to notice the familiar buildings of the big city, she could almost hear the noise, the cars honking, the people talking loud, the chaos that she missed and somehow hated.

In a week she would be in school away from her family again, college was over with, now she had to finish her four university years to become a vet, and she just couldn't wait for the biology classes, her favorite.

The train came to a screeching stop and it was time for her to face the reality, the sad one, her family saw her as an alien, all of them except her little brother, she had never expected comprehension from his part but he had been there for her telling her that two years would go by even before she realized it and he had been right, she only hoped that Kay still loved her and thought about her as much as she did.

Her mom was there by the terminal waiting with open arms to embrace her, while she was away they had talked several times a week on the phone but never about the forbidden topic, never about the pain that was eating her alive, her mom pretended to be completely oblivious to that little detail. Being away from home had taught her how hard life could be, how much you could really miss a person, she had matured, she had grown mentally and physically and she was ready to fight against the world if that meant she was getting a second chance with Kay.

"Hello mother" she said coldly hugging her quickly, feeling out of place in her arms.

"Oh my God, look at you! You look beautiful." Her mom said turning her around and smiling dearly, she was very pleased with her looks.

They walked to the car and in the way her mom was driving her crazy with stories and all the things she had missed out things she had already said over the phone a zillion times.

"You know who called asking for you several times this week?" Her mom asked with a cheerfulness that Alice despised.

"Who" she faked interest not to hurt her mom's feelings.

"That handsome boy, Erick, he asked when you were coming home so he could visit you. I think he really has something going on for you."

"Mom Erick is gay and so am I. Drop it. I don't need you to play match maker anymore I'm an adult and this time I'm not going to let you decide what is best for me."

Alice was pleased to see that her mom actually stopped talking; she looked pretty upset but didn't say another word until they reached the house.

"I don't think you should unpack since you're leaving to the university in a couple of days" her mom said without making eye contact.

"I won't." Alice thought she would feel really happy in her house with her family but all she felt was an empty hole in her middle and she was afraid that it wouldn't go away until she held Kay in her arms and told her that she loved her more than life itself.

The week went by super fast, she had to study for a couple of entry exams that she still had to take, she applied for a part time job at the university's veterinary clinic and spent some time with her little brother. He was huge; he even had a mini beard. Her dad took her out to dinner, the divorce had been final a couple months after she left and her dad only came on the weekends to take his son to soccer games and a pizza.

He didn't say much and as Alice had hoped he didn't mention the topic, he seemed very pleased to spend time with her and find out about her career goal, no personal goals were mentioned so she took that as a warning sign.

The big day had come, she was so scared and excited and nervous, and she couldn't even describe her emotions anymore. Her mom dropped her off at the dorm and she said bye as fast as she could, Erick was waiting for her at the library and he said he had good news, she was hoping that Kay was still in the school, they had so much to talk about, so much to explain.

She dropped everything in her dorm floor and went rushing to the library, it took her a good ten minutes before she got in and she felt a little out of breath. She found him browsing the internet and as always he looked gayer than ever with his rainbow bracelets and his done eyebrows even more perfect than hers.

"Hey you" she said startling him.

Erick stood up and hugged his best friend.

"Oh my god! What happened to you girl? You got hot!!" he was staring at her, she was more than pleased with the reaction that she had been causing everybody, she couldn't tell the difference.

"So what do you want to hear first?" he asked pulling her closer. "The good news or the bad ones?"

"Bad" she said getting ready for his words.

"I introduced myself to her and I tried to tell her that you . . .

"You mean she's here?" she said interrupting him in the middle.

"Sshhh . . . it's the library . . . remember? Yes, she's here but she doesn't want to know anything about you, you hurt her badly."

"Did she tell you that?"

"No her best friend is my lover. The things I've done for you, you can't even begin to imagine."

"Erick no drama right now please. What is the good news?" She was getting impatient.

"She's sitting in that corner." He said pointing to the right corner of the library, there was a bunch of tables there for the students to study.

"What? She's here? Oh my God! What am I going to do?" she started trembling, crying.

"Come on girl, you can't let yourself feel like that, get a grip and go say hello."

"Are you crazy? You just said she doesn't want to talk to me, that she doesn't want to see me."

"Well maybe if she sees you she'll change her mind. Come on Al you have been waiting for this moment for two years, go talk to her." He pushed her gently towards the far right corner of the library, as she walked she felt her throat tighten with tears and her heart was beating wildly in her chest, she saw her back, she was arched forward, towards an open book that she seemed to be reading.

Alice sat on the chair next to her and saw the surprise and pain in Kay's eyes.

"Hello Kay." Alice's voice was a trembling murmur and she couldn't stop shaking, she only hoped it wasn't obvious since the table was full of students that seemed to be very into their books. "Can we talk please?"

"About what? I understood your message very clear when I didn't see you here two years ago." Kay was talking low but Alice could feel the pain and the rage that she felt.

"I promise I can explain, but please let me talk to you, in private" she motioned towards all the peers already giving them dirty looks.

"There's nothing to talk about, you don't have to explain anything, besides it's been a while, I don't even remember why we made that promise to each other, and we were only kids."

"You're lying. I can see it in your eyes, if you really believed in all those things that you're telling me you shouldn't have a reason to act so defensive and hurt." Alice was beginning to feel less nervous and more agitated; Kay knew how to make her lose her calm.

"Listen Alice, I've had a real hard time letting go of you and adapting to my new surroundings, I don't need you to come around now and mess it all up with your regrets. Forget about us." Kay picked up her books and back pack and walked out with Alice on her heels.

Erick was standing by the door and stopped Alice grabbing her by her arm.

"I don't think now is a good time." He said with a serious face.

"Erick let go of me, I won't be able to find her later on." She was looking out searching for Kay and saw her get on a bike.

"Oh believe me; you will see a lot of her around here. You'll be surprised." Erick went inside the little coffee place that the library owned.

Alice decided to go to her room and unpack everything, maybe even meet her new roommate.

Kay looked so different, she looked older and beautiful, she was wearing a basketball jersey so maybe she was in the team, and Alice hoped so.

She walked to her dorm and took the stairs instead of the elevator; she was exhausted not only physically but mentally as well.

She opened the door and stepped in with her head down and was startled by a familiar voice.

"Who the hell told you where I lived?" Kay's faced was streaked with tears and she had her jeans unzipped, she looked like she was going to take a shower or change into another outfit.

"Excuse me? This is my room! I didn't know you had such bad temper, relax." Alice walked by Kay, what was the matter with her?

Kay cleaned her face and sipped her pants; she grabbed her keys from the back of the door and slammed it hard behind her.

After a couple of minutes of trying to calm herself up, Alice decided that she needed to swim or do something that required a lot of physical energy because all she wanted was to sleep and as soon as tomorrow came she would make sure her homework kept her occupied most of the time or else she would go crazy. She changed and put a white towel on her gym bag, walked out the door and took the stairs, thank god the gym was only a couple hundred feet away form her dorm, last thing she wanted was to walk half of the school with her ears red of fury.

When Alice got to the gym there were some boys in the pool so she decided to do a good fifteen minutes on the treadmill before getting into the water, hopefully by that time she would have it all to herself.

Kay was so upset, she wasn't expecting this, she thought she would never see Alice again and even if Erick's comments were a little weird she thought that by the time Alice came to the university she would be gone, and on top of everything some idiot had put them together in the same room again. She thought that she was over Alice and even thought about meeting other girls but never actually got the courage to do so, and this afternoon her whole world shattered into a thousand pieces when she saw Alice sit next to her and try to explain something that she wasn't even sure if she wanted to hear or not, what if it sounded really truthful? Would she fall again? She just couldn't afford another heart break in four months once her program was over, after that, she had decided to move to some sleepy town with her dad and be the sheriff of the county. Those were her big dreams.

Kay walked thru the campus with a tornado on her brain; her world had been shaken by Alice once again. She knocked on her best friend's dorm room door and waited for her to open.

"She's here" Kay said hugging her best friend Dena.

"Who is?" Dena seemed puzzled; she closed the door where Kay had been knocking a couple of seconds ago.

"Alice is here, she's my roommate."

"The Alice? From summer camp?" Dena sat down obviously surprised.

"Yes, she went looking for me at the library and trying to explain some kind of story."

" What did she say?"

"I didn't let her. I don't want to know why she left me, I don't want to hear some stupid excuse for her not to call me and let me know what happened, why she wasn't here two years ago."

"Maybe she has a really good excuse." Dena said trying to help Kay and not knowing how. "Do you remember how much you cried over her? Give her a chance Kay."

"I can't let her hurt me again Dena, I can't" Kay was crying.

"I think you should talk to her with all your defenses high, listen carefully to what she has to say and evaluate it, and then make a decision, at least for the sake of four sane months. Didn't you say she's your roommate?"

"Yes, I even tried to change but they said it was too late."

"Sucks."

"Look at the time and my first class is super early tomorrow. Thanks for the advice; I'll see you tomorrow girly." Kay hugged Dena again and kissed her goodnight, she was such a good friend.

Alice had been swimming for almost an hour and when she looked out the big windows next to the locker rooms she realized that it was dark already and decided to call it a day, she put all her things on her gym bag and walked to the dorms, when she opened the door she heard the shower running and some loud music, provably Kay. She placed her wet shirt on a hanger and sat on the corner of the bed waiting patiently for her turn. After a couple of minutes she heard the water stop and she stood up to get her under wear and a tank top, she saw Kay get out of the bathroom and had to look away immediately, she was . . . naked. They both blushed and Kay tried to play cool saying "Sorry, I didn't hear the door."

To Alice's surprise she didn't sound so mad anymore. "Don't worry I didn't see anything" Alice lied.

Alice went inside the bathroom and closed the door behind her, Kay got dressed and turned on the TV on some opera show about some girls from out of space, and Kay thought it was hilarious. As the program went on so did her mind but on a complete different direction, she had seen the reaction in Alice's eyes when she saw her naked body, it almost looked like passion, desire, but it all happened too fast to be sure that what she saw was what she thought or at least wanted to think.

Alice stepped out smelling so good and with her hair wet and barefoot, she looked so sexy, it was like a model stepping out of a magazine.

"You're staring." Alice said making Kay jump.

"No I'm not" Kay replied looking away.

"Since you refuse to let me explain anything to you, can we at least try to be roommates? Not fight so much, or be rude to each other." Alice sat down and said to Kay looking into her eyes almost getting lost in their infinity.

"I'll do my best, I promise." Kay was serious but willing to cooperate. "Even thought I think we should just ignore each other for the rest of the semester and of course wear more clothes." She said the last part looking at Alice's long uncovered legs.

"Ok, whatever you say."

Alice went around to the other side of the bed and got her teddy bear out, her comforter and got under the covers.

"Let me know if the TV is bothering you." Kay said staring at the bear, she couldn't believe Alice still had it; she had given it to her on their first month anniversary back at the camp. He looked like she had been sleeping with him for the past two years or so.

"I'm ok, thanks."

You have to be stronger than that Kay! She kept repeating to herself, at this pace you'll be all over her in two days.

"What class you have tomorrow?" Alice asked bringing her back from her thoughts.

"Women studies, is a class that analyses how girls think and how they store and understand their experiences." Kay said.

"Are you serious? Me too. The one at 7 am?"

"Yeah"

"Great. More time together." Alice was being a little sarcastic, she knew Kay hated it.

"Good night Alice." Kay turned the TV off and gave her back to Alice who was doing the same.

"Good night Kay"

The alarm went off after what seemed like twenty minutes of sleep, both girls woke up and started getting ready muttering unintelligible good mornings to each other, they both took their turns to use the bathroom and changed into their clothes, they both couldn't stand breakfast so early so they just left the house about fifteen minutes before class started.

"I hope you don't mind if I follow you to the class, I don't know my way around very well yet." Alice said innocently trying to find an excuse to walk next to Kay.

"I don't mind."

They walked in silence the rest of the way and right at the door of the room there was a pretty girl smiling at Kay.

"Hey you!" the girl said smiling dearly at Kay and kissing her right on the lips.

Alice's lower jaw dropped as she saw Kay smiling back and hugging the girl.

She just kept walking and sat as far away from Kay and the girl as she possibly could. She was in shock, out of all the different scenarios that she had pictured over the last two years, she had never imagined that Kay would actually have a girlfriend in school; she never thought she was going to be forgotten so easily.

"Please tell me that all of this has a logical explanation" Kay said to Dena still smiling so Alice wouldn't realize her shock.

"I suppose that's Alice."

Kay nodded.

"Let's make her jealous and see if she really loves you or if she's just feeling miserable that she has to deal with you again." Dena pushed Kay gently inside the half full room and sat down next to her holding her hand.

Even thought Alice was more than five rows above and fourteen seats away she could perfectly see what that girl was doing to Kay, she was touching her legs and holding her hand like if she owned her. Alice was so pissed, she wanted to go and pull Kay from her seat and kiss her right there in front of the whole world and tell everyone that that was her girl and that nobody could touch her but her.

The professor introduced himself and talked about the class and the requirements and everything that everyone already knew, wasn't that ironic? A guy teaching how a woman's mind works.

The hour seemed endless and Alice couldn't get her eyes off Kay and the girl that she refused to call her Kay's girlfriend even though it was clearer than water that she was.

The class was finally over and all the students were getting out, Alice didn't know what to do, she didn't want Kay to introduce her to that girl, but she didn't want to seem rude or antisocial so she decided to walk towards them.

"I've got to run babe, I'll see you later." Dena said to Kay loud so Alice could hear her and kissed her in the mouth again. She turned around and left swinging her blonde hair in the air.

"You didn't tell me you had a girlfriend." Alice tried to sound cool but she was almost certain that Kay knew she was disappointed and sad at the fact.

"Yeah, sorry, her name is Dena. Isn't she beautiful?" Kay said not quite understanding her pal's plan but playing along with it.

"Sorry to have bothered you, if I would have known I wouldn't even have come to look for you after all and mess up your life."

"Alice don't worry your not that important anyways" Immediately after the words left Kay's mouth she was already regretting them, why was she hurting Alice so much? Why did it bother her so much?

"I know, I just realized what a fool I've made of myself." Alice turned around and walked out the door, not quite sure where she was going.

"Al wait; I didn't mean it that way."

"Don't worry Kay, I understand perfectly fine, we are roommates now nothing more than roommates." Alice gave her a sad smile and kept walking hiding from Kay the tears that were burning her eyes.

Kay felt like running after her and telling her that she still loved her that she didn't care why she didn't show up two years ago that she was here now but she was nailed to the ground, deep inside she cared, she felt betrayed by the girl that she loved so much.

She only had two classes this semester and she knew Alice only had two as well, but the difference between them was that these were Kay's last and Alice didn't know that.

Alice walked and walked until she was exhausted, she felt devastated, alone, and she knew that somehow she had to find her strengths at least until the end of the semester and then since their majors were completely different they would probably never see each other again.

There was a tiny pond with artificial flowers floating and around it, there were little benches under tree branches. Alice sat down and remembered how perfect they had been together, they never fought, and they shared so many special moments, a thousand kisses, a ton of love. It was unbelievable, how could everything be over? She was so mad at her mom for making such a life changing decision, they had broken her heart in a million pieces, she wasn't even going to try to talk to Kay anymore, nothing that she explained would change the way she felt or the way that the girl felt about her.

Alice stood up and decided to go to the dorms and wait there until her next class which was at eight pm, she would find something to occupy her mind in the mean time maybe she should get a dog, or maybe not. She opened the door and was relieved to find the house empty the last thing she wanted was to have another confrontation with Kay; her job right now would be to work hard in making herself strong and seem unbothered by Kay and her girlfriend's actions even if it killed her with jealousy. She went to the bathroom and picked up the mess that she had made in the morning, she had a habit of washing her undies every day after a shower; it usually spared her embarrassments when she had to go to the public laundry rooms. It was already dry and she folded it carefully and placed it on her nightstand drawer. She had a book that she had checked out at a public library by her house it was a horror thriller her favorite topic, she put her glasses on and lay back on the bed and began reading.

Paolo and Erick were doing laps around the basketball courts while Kay practiced her shooting skills. Paolo was helping Erick lose some weight but he was almost certain that he wouldn't since he had always been overweight and he didn't have a problem with it, but it seemed that Paolo did. They had stopped and sat down by the benches, to catch their breath.

"How was your first night with Alice?" Paolo asked his ex-roommate.

"The worst and happiest of my life" she said feeling crappy.

"Can you elaborate a little more?" Erick was drinking some Gatorade while listening to the conversation.

"I am crazy about her, guys, you know that, but at the same time I can't forget what she did to me 2 years ago."

"Did you listen to what she has to say?" Paolo asked her.

"I don't want to hear it, she could have called."

"Kay I think you should stop being an ass to her and making her believe that you and Dena are going out and listen to her". Erick didn't like what she was doing, he felt sorry Alice going thru so much and how Kay was being immature.

"What are you talking about Erick"?

"Don't be so innocent Kay, everybody already knows that you and Dena are going out, or should I say, "Pretending."

"Get your act together girl". Paolo said while picking up his bag and helping Erick to his feet.

"We'll see you later". They left. Kay was left there sitting in the floor alone, who told everyone? Was it Dena?

She decided to go and talk to Dena and end this mess, she wanted to talk to Alice and listen to what she had to say, what did she had to lose? She needed a shower fast but wanted to talk to Dena first, and then she would go home and sit down and talk.

Dena opened the door even before Kay's second knock; she was all dressed up and looked pretty.

"Hey Kay" she smiled

"I'll walk you to your car" Kay said closing the door.

"What happened? Did you guys talked?"

"Not yet, I plan to do so this afternoon, but first I want to thank you for trying to help but I don't want to keep pretending that we are going out, I want you as my best friend ok?"

"Sure thing. I hope we didn't make things worse."

"I hope so too" They hugged and Dena sped away in her mini cooper.

That was easy; Kay thought and crossed the street to the yard of her dorm.

Alice felt asleep with her book across her chest and her reading glasses on, Kay opened the door and stepped in looking for Alice, she saw her on the bed and had a flashback to the first day she saw Alice with her earphones on and her green eyes closed. She looked beautiful then and she looked even prettier now, her hair was longer and her skin more tan. Kay walked towards her unable to control her impulses and gently took Alice's glasses off, took the book closed it and placed it on top of the nightstand next to the glasses, Alice moaned and moved a little making Kay jump, she turned to her side and her hair behind the ears was wet, a sign of tears. Kay removed her bed cover and covered Al up to her chin, it was almost noon and she still had four hours before her next class. She wanted to kiss her forehead and whisper in her ear that everything would be ok but didn't want Alice to wake up and see her in such an uncomfortable position.

Kay went to take a shower and she hoped that by the time she finished Alice would be awake already.

Alice woke up from a scary nightmare and found herself covered with Kay's sheets, they smelled just like her, she heard the shower running and all of a sudden she realized that Kay had taken her book away and had covered her with her sheets, her heart started to beat faster when the water stopped hitting the bathtub. Kay stepped out wearing pajama pants and a tank top, her skin red probably from the hot water.

"Are you awake Al?" Kay sat down next to Alice and touched her thigh slightly.

"Yeah" she said looking at Kay.

"I'm sorry about earlier, after class, I shouldn't have talked to you that way."

"You have all the right in the world to act that way; I was the one that screwed up, not you." Alice sounded so sad, without hope.

"I want to talk to you about Dena" She paused trying to find the right words to say.

"I . . . "

"You don't have to explain anything Kay, really, I'm the one who's sorry for assuming that you would still be in love with me, for assuming that you wouldn't move on and that your feelings for me were still the same. I'm sorry for coming into your life and crashing your world, for promising things two years ago that I had no control over, I'm sorry for hurting you."

"Don't say that Al, we had something really special"

"Does she make you happy?" Alice sat with her back against the bed post; she looked so sweet, so vulnerable.

"She's not my girlfriend; she's just my best friend."

"Then why was she kissing you?"

"She thought that by making you jealous I would make you feel bad about what happened." Kay felt so stupid.

"I don't know what to say" Alice was confused.

"It was a bad and immature idea, I shouldn't have done it"

"Does that mean that you still have feelings for me?" Kay opened her mouth but her reply was drowned out by a hard knock on the door. Both girls were startled and Kay got up to open it.

Erick and Paolo came in looking fresh and clean.

"Hi girls" Erick said. "Alice come over here so you can meet Paolo." He was always so cheerful.

After a few seconds she came out smiling, she introduced herself to Paolo and kissed Erick on the cheek.

"Did you girls eat already?" Paolo inquired looking at Kay, she looked puzzled but somehow there was a hint of happiness in her eyes.

"You are inviting us out?"

"Pizza sounds good?"

"Sure" They both said at the same time.

"I'm going to change real quickly, unless you want me with pajamas down stairs?"

"Just hurry up, I'm starving." Erick sat on the couch next to Alice.

"Did you guys talked?"

"Yeah, kind of." She paused. "I haven't explained anything yet, she was clarifying that Dena and her are just friends."

"Well I'm glad, you two definitely look better than yesterday."

Paolo was busy reading a sports magazine, and wasn't paying too much attention to their conversation.

"I feel much better too, especially after she told me the truth about Dena, it felt like the weight of the world got off my shoulders."

"I'm ready, let's go." She looked hot.

"Where exactly are we going?" Alice asked closing the door once everyone was out in the hallway.

"It's a little place about 20 minutes from here." Paolo's car was small, so Kay and Alice were squeezed in the back of the car.

Erick kept making small talk but the tension in the back kept growing, both girls were looking out the windows talking back to their friend when required to do so or laughing when he made a joke; the ride was becoming endless.

After a thousand turns and a hassle to find parking they were finally there, they went inside to find a room crowded with college students and a few middle aged couples, most likely teachers. They found a table towards the back and ordered a large cheese and pepperoni pizza; it was their favorite.

Alice and Kay's thigh were rubbing against each other because the booth was so small.

"Sorry a little tight" Kay said unable to put distance between them without falling to the floor.

"It's cool" She smiled back and felt her chest compress with so much love for this exceptional girl.

"You hungry?" Kay asked touching her hand.

Alice nodded pulling her hand from underneath Kay's; she didn't know why she had done it, why she was acting so defensive.

The pizza arrived on record time they all ate and drank their colas in silence.

Alice couldn't stop thinking about tonight, what was going to happen? She wanted Kay so badly but at the same time was so afraid of losing her, so many things that they had to talk about.

"Did you hear about the party that Susan is throwing this Friday?" Erick hated silence.

"Yeah I heard" Kay said "Are you going?"

"I'm not sure yet, you know I'll rather go to parties with no drugs in it."

"I'm sorry I moved my hand K, I got scared, I wasn't expecting that." Alice said leaning against Kay and whispering it on her ear.

"I understand" she said grabbing her hand again under the table and entwining their fingers.

"You don't know how much I missed this" Alice held her tight and scrolled closer to her forgetting all about the pizza, getting lost in her eyes.

"We need to talk Al." Kay was so nervous, so happy and at the same time with all her guard up.

Erick read the girl's mind; he stood up and said something to Paolo because he followed.

"We'll be back ladies" Paolo said already walking away.

"Kay when I got home after that summer and I told my mom that I was a lesbian, she went bananas, she told me that I was sick that I needed help. I never expected that from her or my dad. The next day they sent me away to Europe where I studied my minor in biology. I tried calling you, I wrote to you but I don't know how my mom would always get in the way and stop the messages I cried everyday and dreamt of the day that I would see you again. Just a couple of months before I came I contacted Erik and he convinced my mom that he liked me so she gave him my phone number. He told me that you were here, and you were studying and he met Paolo. Through him we realized that you were still alone, and that I still had a chance to explain myself."

"Wow that sounds like science fiction, don't you think?" Kay was sipping coke while looking away in the distance.

"You don't have to believe me but I promise that if you give me another chance I'll make you fall in love with me again and show you that I haven't stopped loving you. We can start from zero if you want."

"I think is going to take me a little bit to process all that info"

"I don't expect you to answer me right away and if your decision is to be just friends I'll understand too." Alice looked sad again.

"Why don't we go home and finish this conversation there? Let's go get the boys"

Kay stood up aware of the looks that everyone was giving them.

They walked out still holding each other's hand; Erick and Paolo were on the car having an argument because Erick was checking out a boy or some kind of drama. They sat on the back and stared out the window on the ride back home.

Erick and Paolo were too busy fighting to realize that they got to the destination and that their friends got off the car, they said bye and each couple were left alone to solve their own problems.

"I have a class at four so our conversation is going to have to wait, I'll try to be back as soon as possible." Kay said walking behind Alice.

"Ok, no problem." Alice walked thru the door that Kay had opened for her and sat on the couch while Kay got ready to go to her criminal justice class.

Alice could see her through the open door; she was hoping with all her heart that Kay would give her another chance that she would think about how good they had been together.

"You're staring" Kay said walking out of the room with a book bag and a pen in her right hand.

"Sorry I couldn't help it" Alice said and looked down to the floor.

"Are you sure you'll be ok?" The bag went down with a thud and Kay sat next to Alice on the couch.

"I'm just worried, about us, about your decision"

"Come here" she hugged her tight "Everything is going to be ok, you'll see."

"I missed you so much . . . your warmth, your love." Alice said unable to stop the tears coming down her face.

"I missed you more." She replied tightening their embrace even more.

They sat there hugging each other, caressing their backs for a long time, Alice was crying and so was Kay, they both had longed for this moment.

"Kay look at the time, you should go already." Alice pulled away breaking the embrace that felt so comforting.

"Maybe I shouldn't go."

"You have to, it's the first day." She smiled a little.

"Only if you promise that you'll think of me and that there will be no more crying"

"Yes to the thinking about you, but I can't promise not to cry."

"Would you stop if I kiss you?" Kay was getting closer.

"Maybe" Alice said closing her eyes to receive Kay's warm kiss. It was so sweet and tender and both girls were surprised to discover the feelings that it awakened. They pulled away and Kay left without saying a thing.

Alice sat down on the window sill and looked outside, if she could only feel like the day looked. It was so sunny, not a single cloud in the sky, the birds were chirping and the school looked full of life with students walking all over the place doing their regular activities.

She was anxious to know what Kay had to say what her decision was going to be, Alice would fight against her family and the whole world if she had to but this time she wasn't giving up.

She turned the TV on but couldn't find any interesting programs; they were all trying to sell something, a super blender for the kitchen or a little machine to make you shed those extra pounds.

Kay was sitting on the third row of desks, it was a small class and she knew some of her classmates from previous semesters, but she couldn't even engage in small talk, her mind was far away, thinking about Alice, on one side she believed her but on the other she had doubts that were driving her crazy. She loved her to death but she had to look after herself, that was her priority at the moment or else she would wind up hurt one more time.

The class was finally over and she had a bunch of research to do on suicides on the early twenties, it was her first paper's topic. She was ready to talk to Alice and finally get everything straight. Alice was on the phone when Kay opened the door.

"Ok mom" she was saying.

Kay went to the room to give her some privacy and turned on her laptop she wanted to start gathering the info, statistics, sources etc.

"Mom I have to go, say hi to Ryan" Alice hanged up without the usual `I love you' she was still mad at her mom for screwing up her life.

Alice went in the room and sat on the corner of Kay's bed which was about three feet away from the computer desk.

"Ready?" Alice's voice was trembling.

"Like you've said before we've been through a lot and we love each other but I don't think we are going to be able to save our relationship and go through everything else that is going to come"

"What do you mean?"

"Al you are a city girl with a family that opposes gay relationships I'll be done in four months and I'm leaving, I'm going back to where I belong, back with my dad, from where I should have never left."

"What do you mean you'll be done?"

"When you didn't show up I decided to do a faster program so I could get the hell out of here, I'm becoming a police officer, this is my last semester and if I tell you that I want to give us another chance I would be playing unfair because long distance relationships just don't work."

"So you're just giving up on us?"

"It's not that, you know I adore you Alice, you mean everything to me but I have to be realistic."

"What if I come with you?"

"That's crazy. You need to finish your career, you wouldn't leave your family behind, we are in pain now but you'll see that after a few months we will both be feeling better and you will realize that this is the best for both of us."

"Then to hell with all your love promises, to hell with all those beautiful moments that we both shared, to hell with us."

"I didn't say that I'm taking all that back, I will never forget you Alice and I will always love you but this is the decision that I've made."

"Ok then." Alice stood up and grabbed her book bag, her class wouldn't start for another three hours but she needed some fresh air.

Alice's phone rang in her pocket and she recognized her dad's number on the caller ID.

"Hi dad" she said trying to sound happy.

"Hey baby, how are you?"

"Not so good, do you think you could pick me up and talk for a bit?"

"I'll be there in fifteen minutes"

"Thanks dad. Bye"

Kay was devastated, she was sure she had done the right thing but why did it hurt so much, she wanted to stay with Alice but she wanted to be with her dad, he had done so many sacrifices so she could be somebody, she wasn't going to abandon him.

Alice's dad picked her up near her dorm-room and took her to a public park near by, they sat by a lake in the side of the property and Alice told him everything, the way she felt, what Kay had said and that she knew he didn't approve.

"Alice you are my daughter and I will always accept you regardless of your sexual orientation and if I never mentioned the topic before was because I thought you felt uncomfortable."

She smiled at him, it felt great that her dad understood her and didn't care.

"So this Kay girl loves you but doesn't want to be with you?" he asked.

"She thinks is the best thing that we will never pull it off."

"What do you plan to do about it?"

"There's nothing I can do, is her decision, I don't want to live with her under these circumstances."

"It's almost time for your class, tonight when you get to the apartment ask her again and make sure that she is not going to change her mind, if her answer is not call me in the morning and we'll figure it out together."

They walked to the car in silence both evaluating their options, he dropped her off close to the classroom and said goodnight.

"Hello Alice" a familiar voice made her jump, she turned around and was surprised, a friend from her previous college.

"Darlene! Oh my god! I didn't know you were coming down here" Alice was really happy to see her friend.

"It was a last minute thing" The other girl said hugging Alice.

"How's everything?" Alice was a little puzzled, what was Darlene doing all the way down here?

"Great. I love it."

Darlene was a lesbian too, she was taller than Alice and her skin was so pale that if you tried hard enough you could see her green veins. She had fine features, very pretty.

Darlene had feelings for Alice but decided to keep her as a friend when Alice told her about Kay.

"Did you find her?" She sat next to Alice towards the back of the small auditorium where the class was taking place.

"Yes but she doesn't want anything to do with me" Alice sighed "She's my roommate."

"That sucks such a small world. How are you coping with that?"

"I'm not. I think my dad is going to ask me to move in with him."

"Why don't you get a job?"

"Where?"

"I found one at a clinic they pay good and they are still hiring, I can hook you up if you want."

"Is it far from here?"

"A little but it would give you something to occupy your mind and also some experience on our field."

"Sounds like a great idea."

The class was over fast and Darlene insisted on walking her to her room.

Kay heard some voices in the hallway and recognized Alice's, she went into the living room.

"Thanks for walking me home."

"You're welcome, anytime." Darlene smiled

"Good night" Alice said and hugged her friend again.

"I'll call you tomorrow after I get out of work" Darlene was already walking down the corridor.

"Sounds great" she opened the door and saw Kay standing there looking at her weird.

"Was that your new girlfriend?" she asked accusingly.

"Have you changed your mind?"

"No"

"Then I don't have to answer your questions"

Alice walked by Kay without saying anything else, she threw her book bag in the closet and went inside the bathroom closing the door behind her.

Kay was shocked, she had never seen this side of Alice before, but she had all the right in the world to act pissed, to dislike her, to do with her life as she pleased. After a few minutes Alice got out of the shower and went straight to bed, turned off the lights and went to sleep.

Kay tried to do the same but she kept twisting and turning unable to keep her eyes shut, did she make the right decision or the worst mistake of her life. If she could only see the future everything would be so much easier. All she wanted was to jump into Alice's bed and cuddle and make love and forget about tomorrow but that would only make matters worse.

Darlene called just like she had promised after she got out of work. She had good news, they were going to give Alice a part time job, she would have to be there Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays from 12:00 pm to 4:00 pm. Her position was going to be vet's assistant, she would have to weight and measure the patients and help with all the procedures, she was super happy, she couldn't wait to start.

Kay had been sitting on the computer desk doing homework while Alice spoke to Darlene sitting on her bed, while Alice was getting happier hearing all the details about her new job, Kay was getting jealous.

"You are the best, I love you." Alice said knowing that those words were going to bother Kay.

"Don't even think about it, you know I would do anything for you." Darlene never missed an opportunity to remind Alice that she was interested.

"I'll see you tonight then." Alice hanged up the phone and opened her book, she wanted to go over the material that the professor had covered in class.

Kay was trying her best not to burst into a jealousy attack, her heart was beating fast, her mind was replaying those words that Alice had said, she just couldn't concentrate on her research project, lately she couldn't concentrate on anything.

Alice was having a hard time too, Kay was only a few feet away and all she wanted to do was to go sit on her lap and kiss her until she forgot her own name until all she could hear was her heart beating with Kay's.

"Alice?" Kay startled Alice bringing her back from her day dream.

"Yeah" she replied trying to sound normal.

"Do you really love her?"

"Who" She was confused, what was Kay talking about now?

"Your girlfriend" she sounded pissed dragging the words.

"Darlene?" It hit Alice like a rock, she remembered what she had said on the phone.

"Yes that girl from last night." Alice stayed quiet for a while, thinking what to say to Kay, she thought about saying - are you crazy I love you- but changed her mind.

"Do you know what your problem is?"

"What is it?" Kay said looking at Alice defiantly.

"That you're always assuming things."

"That's not true, I . . ."

"Do you think that if I loved her and I was her girlfriend I would be sitting here pretending to read staring at your back daydreaming with your kisses." Kay's defensive front was shattered by Alice's words.

"Al please don't say does things."

It was the first time in years that Kay had called her Al, and somehow it felt strange, invasive.

"Why are you so afraid of everything?"

"Because everybody leaves." Kay said almost screaming.

"Oh my God! I can't believe that you are going there again, how many times do I have to tell you that it wasn't my choice, that I couldn't help it."

"What gives me the security that is not going to happen again"

"Obviously the fact that I'm here means nothing to you, I'm an adult and I know what I want, and I will fight for it." She paused. "Do you know what you want Kay?"

"Alice I'm leaving in four months, there is no university where I'm going, you have your future ahead of you, your career, your family."

"My future is sitting in front of me being selfish."

A few weeks went by and Alice couldn't believe they had ignored each other so well, they had barely spoken even though you could almost see the tension coming from both of them when they were under the same roof.

Alice was working, she loved it and just like Darlene had said it kept her mind away from Kay.

Kay on the other hand was having the worst time of her life, she was doing good in her classes but she still thought about Alice constantly, she had quit the basketball team and was now hatred by half of the school because they had lost all the games ever since she left. She and her dad talked about everything and he had assured her that he wouldn't mind if she stayed in the city, that he understood love and that it would be a tremendous shame if she lost Alice. Kay knew his heart was breaking that he missed her but he would always put his daughter's happiness before his.

That didn't make her changed her mind, she adored Alice but it just wouldn't work, she had to go back to her dad and help him.

Alice was going to turn 20 in three days and her dad had a surprise for her, her plans had been made already, she would have lunch with her mom and her brother and dinner and a movie with her dad. She was excited and intrigued, her dad had said that she should be ready because from that day on, her life was going to change. She didn't think Kay remembered, they had only mentioned birthdates once at the camp.

The day was finally here and Alice woke up with a big smile on her face, she saw that Kay was still sleeping and had to fight the impulse to go to her bed and cuddle, she missed her so much, lately they didn't even fight anymore, they completely ignored each other, she had heard her cry at night and in some instances say her name while she slept. Alice couldn't understand why Kay was so hard headed it was very obvious that she loved her.

Alice headed for the shower, it was a better idea than to stay there staring at her ex. She took her time shaving her legs and armpits, her arms and also her privates. She washed her hair and body and came out feeling new. She finished drying herself in the room because the bathroom was full of fog and humidity from the hot water. Kay was still sleeping so she wouldn't mind or say something smart.

Alice finished getting dressed and fixed her hair, put on her sandals and applied some makeup, it was still early but she wanted to be ready and if Kay woke up she wanted her to see her looking beautiful.

Kay had been awake all the time, she had seen Alice look at her with sad eyes, she had seen her expression change to lust as she looked at Kay's body but it had all happened too fast, Alice was a dangerous territory that she had been avoiding for quite a while, Alice disappeared into the bathroom and Kay took advantage of her absence to go and put her birthday gift on her pillow, after a few minutes Alice came back naked and Kay's heart sped up. What had happened to the house rules?, Oh my God, those bare legs neatly shaven were driving Kay insane, her beautiful breasts that Kay had caressed so long ago moved as she moved, like music rhythm. After Alice finished, she saw the envelope lying on her pillow, it said Happy B-Day Al.

"Kay are you awake?" Alice heart sped up as she spoke.

"I've been awake" she replied sitting on the bed crossing her legs.

"Why didn't you tell me something" Alice sat on her bed across from Kay and opened the envelope blushing.

"Because I was enjoying the show."

"It's not like you've never seen me naked" Alice felt so self conscious.

"You're right, I've seen you before." Kay was dying to see her reaction when she saw the card she smiled, it was a puppy playing with a kitten and inside there was a picture. Alice's eyes widened, it was them kissing after the first time they had ever made love two years ago, they were both virgins and you could see on the picture the love and happiness in their eyes. Alice's eyes filled with tears that she swallowed bitterly.

"I had forgotten about this picture." Alice said seriously.

"Happy Birthday Al. I hope everything you ever wish for is granted."

"Thanks" She replied placing the card and the picture carefully inside the envelope. She stood up and opened her drawer to safely take care of her most precious gift. When she turned around Kay was standing in her way.

"May I hug you?" Kay asked looking at Alice she didn't replied she just threw herself at her arms and held her tight perceiving her scent and feeling her body against hers.

"You smell so good Kay" Alice whispered in her ear making Kay's skin full of goose bumps.

Kay pulled back and kiss Alice on the lips, softly first and then more intense making her moan, she played with her tongue biting her lower lip and then sucking on it. Her hands were all over Alice caressing her face, her hair, her arms and back up and down making her legs weak. Kay's hand cupped one of Alice's breasts while looking at her eyes they were close but she perfectly see the pleasure. They were both breathing hard and fast Alice raised her arms and Kay took her shirt off revealing her creamy breasts and hard nipples. Kay's mouth surrounded her breast and played on her nipple sucking and licking it until Alice pulled away and took charge. Alice took her time she kissed Kay everywhere she took her clothes off along with hers and gently pushed Kay to her bed, she kept kissing her and touching her body, her back, her legs, finally she got on top of Kay and moved sexually making her moan with pleasure. Alice switched to one side and with her right leg parted Kay's, her hand caressed her inner thighs her belly and finally her fingers brushed ever so slightly her throbbing privates. She was extremely wet and warm and she loved the way it felt touching her there. So much intimacy hearing her moan and say her name was driving her nuts. Alice played with Kay's clit she teased her until she begged her to stop or she would cum. Alice was laying down now with Kay's head between her legs she was so good at it she was driving her insane her tongue was going up and down and every time it reached the end she would thrust it inside of Alice gently but firmly her fingers substituted her tongue , first one and then two she wet and warm and slippery it tasted delicious she fingered and licked at the same time until Alice screamed and came saying her name. Kay turned Alice around facing down and got on top of her moving against her ass every time Kay pushed in Alice pushed out and it didn't took to long for Kay to collapsed trembling on top of Alice satisfied and happy. Telling her that she loved her in her ear.