"Ow..." I winced, waking up on my side. The couch definitely had been a more comfortable bed last night than it was now. Looking around, it was almost 10 in the morning and I sighed. Another quiet day at home.
I showered and threw on my clothes for the day, a sweatshirt that again was a little too large and hung off one side of my shoulder and a pair of loose sweats that went down to cover my feet. I brushed my teeth in absolute silence, and while I did, the boy in the mirror looked me over. My dark black hair had lightened a bit since the last I saw it, it had a bit of a brown tinge now, but it still was a mess sitting atop my head. My eyes were a little groggy still from sleeping and my lips looked a little dry. I looked over at Henry's toothbrush sitting beside his half of the sink and wondered if I would ever see him again in this lifetime...
Breakfast was just berries with toast and glass of almond milk. It was at this point that I considered running again... but the aching of my calves urged me to forget about that. Instead, I realized that I had used up the last of my fruit stores and coincidentally had also finished the almond milk. Time to go to the store.
It was a weak excuse I used to get myself out of the house. Looking back, I could just have easily survived with cereal for breakfast. I still had Henry's milk and his box of some... frosted cereal that he had loved since he was a child. Still, I knew I had to get out of the house, or else its silence would swallow me whole. My closet seemed so dull now, and I wondered if it was worth changing just to go to the store...
Luckily, my common sense won, and I threw my clothes off and onto the bed. In their place came a long sleeved crimson red shirt that hung just a little loosely on me, the way I loved. It had a hood that honestly sat there more than it did on my head. A pair of khaki shorts and a pair of whatever shoes happened to be within reach slipped on and I was ready to go. Getting into the car I cursed myself for forgetting the bags for the grocery and got out again. It seemed that lately I had begun to get more and more forgetful. I returned to the car and slipped the bags into the backseat. Looking over my car I noticed that it had gotten a little dirty during the last rainstorm and convinced myself to get a carwash as well. I sighed as I got into the car and felt its leather seats cradle me and remembered Henry sitting in the passenger's seat asking if I liked his present to me for getting into medical school. He had bought it for me under the excuse that if I were to take such a large step into adult hood, I couldn't get by on my old worn out car. I didn't protest, but I remember that night there was copious amounts of cuddling that night.
Now, the passenger seat sat empty, and I shook myself out of my daydream and started the car. Pulling onto the road I drove in silence until I couldn't take it anymore and turned on the radio. Jazz, Piano, Rock, and Pop music, I flew through all the channels before settling on the news channel. It was your usual reports, traffic here, more traffic there, and the occasional missing child alert. After some time, I just tuned out the radio and it became a comforting sort of background noise.
Just as I took the ramp to get onto the highway I noticed that a bunch of the cars behind me had begun to swerve and suddenly a red car dove through the hole between them. He was speeding down the road and I jumped a little as I jerked the wheel to the side just in time to avoid being slammed into. Unfortunately the sedan in front wasn't as lucky and I heard the very distinct crunch of metal and the squealing of tires as the two collided. Both cars ended up tipping over with the speeder's car ending upside down, the other on its side.
"Oh crap..." I gasped as my heart pounded and I felt my mouth go dry. I packed my car along the side and got out as other bystanders were doing the same. Running over, I noticed that people were understandably keeping their distance, but no one had checked on the drivers. Things looked grim, there was a small voice somewhere from the sideways car and I ran to it, bursting through the crowd of onlookers.
"Help..." I heard as I approached and I climbed onto the car, its hot sides pressing against my palms. The driver was a woman who was frantically trying to indicate there was a second passenger in the back. Her son had managed to work himself free from the seatbelt and was now huddled against the side of the car. Aside from the small bump on his head he seemed to be okay, with no noticeable trauma.
"Ma'am, I'm going to get your son okay?" I told her as I motioned for someone to help, no one.
Groaning I managed to pry open the door and reached for him. I pulled him out and it was only then that a woman from the crowd came out to receive him.
"Take him over there please, to the grassy area." I instructed. Next, came the woman.
I looked her over and wondered what I should do to help her. She told me her arm felt numb, but aside from that everything else seemed to be okay. She would be okay for a little, and her child was out of harm's way. I went to check on the driver in the upside down car and saw a man still hanging upside down from his seatbelt. He was having chest pains and was gasping for breath. I assessed his situation and fortunately he had no serious injuries that I could see, his head movements were still normal and aside from a laceration on his head he seemed fairly lucid.
"Someone please, come help me get this man out..." I cried and a burly man from the nearby group came out. Together we managed to get the driver out and laid him on the grassy area as well.
By now, the group had managed to help the woman over to the same area.
I looked at the three people in front of me, and asked if anyone in the crowd was a doctor. Of course, as luck would have it, there were none.
The woman cried that she couldn't move her arm and I ran to her. Her arm seemed to be on fire to her, yet she couldn't feel anything beyond that. Feeling her shoulder I noted a certain curvature that shouldn't be there, she had dislocated her shoulder. This, I could manage.
"What's your name?" I asked of her, as I looked around and found nothing to use as a sling. "Sarah" She replied between pants. "Sarah? Your shoulder is dislocated okay? It could be that it's affecting your circulation and that's why you're feeling the way you are okay? I'm going to have to pop the joint back into place okay?" "A-Are you a doctor?" She asked as she nodded, and I purposefully ignored her question. How was I going to tell her that I was a student doctor?
I told her that it would hurt, but it would be over in a flash. In a moment I braced her and with a quick jerk she screamed as I felt her shoulder pop back into place. Gently, I laid down her arm and she sighed a little breath of relief. I smiled reassuringly as I cut off the sleeves of my shirt and tied them together to make a make-shift sling.
"Sit up okay? Keep your arm in this sling to rest your shoulder until help arrives." I told her, letting her sit against a tree. Her son sat next to her and she kissed him, asking if he was okay, to which the boy nodded.
"Uh... Uhh.. This guy... is in bad shape!" One of the bystanders shouted and I ran over to the male driver. He was in respiratory distress. My guess was that he had begun feeling the initial symptoms of a heart attack and was trying to rush to the hospital when it over took him.
"Should have just called for an ambulance..." I muttered before getting on my knees. He was beginning to fade in and out of consciousness.
"Does anyone have CPR training?!" I shouted and a young man in the crowd raised his hand. I instructed him to begin CPR and began to listen for any breath sounds in between. Fortunately this didn't go on for too long as the ambulance arrived soon after. They took the three from the cars in and to the hospital.
I sighed as the last ambulance with the woman and the little boy was beginning to close up. Somewhere, the boy had apparently identified me, as well as the crowd, that I was the one performing any initial care.
"Good job son," the paramedic told me as he came to check on me. "Thanks..." "Are you a doctor?" He asked, a bit skeptical. "I'm... a medical student..." I replied softly. "Are you trained in the things you did today?" "Y-Yeah..." I nodded slowly. I lied, before today I had only done these things in the presence of a faculty member. Otherwise, books were all that I had. Reluctantly, I gave him my contact information and he told me that they may contact me to see if I would provide a witness statement. "Good job, go home, take a break, you deserve it." He said, patting my back.
After thanking him, I got back into my car and sat in the driver seat for a bit, just looking at the road ahead of me. Traffic was slowly clearing, just moving along as if nothing had ever happened. The only signs I bore were a few blood stains on my hands, and some dirt on my knees. I grabbed my spare change of clothes from my night bag and threw on a black long sleeved shirt. I had bought the two together, but kept the black one in my overnight bag in case I spent the night at the school. Now, the red one was missing its sleeves, and I suppose I should throw it away...
I drove to the market and it was a very surreal feeling, knowing what I had just been through and having it all replay in my mind, yet here I was, going about my day as if nothing had happened.
I picked up the ingredients missing from my shopping list and stood in line. I noticed in the chrome reflection on the cashier's stand that I had a small black smudge on my face. Quickly I wiped it away and smiled politely as she began to ring up my items. Just behind me, I heard a lady talking to her friend about a car accident that had happened just a few hours ago and how a "young man" had stepped up to save the kid involved.
Leaving the store I put the groceries in my car and paused a little before starting the car. I was... terrified.
What if I run into another accident on the way home? What if I don't know what to do this time? What if...
My fears consumed me and I sat in the parking lot for a good 30 minutes, trying to calm myself. I shifted around in the car to find my bag with my music player in it. As I turned I felt something in my pocket press against me. It was Henry's ring... I held it in my palm now, clenching my fist around it, feeling its firmness.
"Henry..." I mumbled as the surge of emotion came from deep within me. All the repressed sadness I had buried within came out now. I cried and cried and I sobbed as I felt his ring in my hand. I wanted him here so badly now. It had been almost nine months now, I have been alone for nine months... I need him, I needed the safety only he could bring me. I was so scared...
So I sat in my car... tears streaming down my eyes for the next 10 minutes, and after a good long cry, I was too exhausted to think of anything other than getting home.
I threw my things into the fridge, not even bothering to take them out of the bags. My clothes came off and I climbed into bed in nothing but my boxers. Even in my self-pity I managed to bring myself to study a little before I fell asleep and my books ended up on Henry's side of the bed.
--- I woke up the next morning to look at my notebook, Henry had called, and I had missed him again. My stomach growled and I realized that I hadn't eaten anything since breakfast yesterday. After putting back on my house clothes, I brushed my teeth and for some reason felt as if something were different today. I groaned as I remembered that I had forgotten to unpack my groceries and would need to do that before I got breakfast.
When I opened the bedroom door I heard something shifting in the kitchen and stopped.
"Jason?" I asked, forgetting that I hadn't even given Jason a key.
I approached the kitchen to hear the motion stop. Looking in, I stopped to see Henry standing at the stove, he had on his apron over a dress shirt and his black slacks. He looked at me for a moment and I stared back at him.
I nearly fell to pieces right then and there. My eyes watered and my knees felt weak.
"Good Morning... Aiden..." he said to me, setting down the pan he had in his hand and walking over, his arms open for a hug. I nearly jumped into his arms and buried myself in the crook of his neck. I cried silent tears as he patted my back and gently brushed the back of my head with his hands.
"I was going to try and make you breakfast in bed, you looked so tired last night and this morning you looked so peaceful... Did I wake you up?" He said as he held onto me. "Henry...Henry..."I repeated. "I know... I know..." he patted me again trying to reassure me. He laughed a little as I started hiccupping against him. "Aiden... I missed you so much..." he told me, his voice deep and comforting.
"Aiden... are you going to look at me? Oh... Why are you crying? Don't cry..." He rubbed the tears from my eyes when I gazed up at him. He smiled and turned off the heat from the stove and took me over to the couch. I didn't say a single word to him. He sat down and laid me down with my head sitting in his lap. I could feel his hands brushing my hair out of my face and he smiled brightly, putting his hands on mine and told me to just close my eyes. I felt him slide the throw over me again and his hand kept slightly stroking my hair. Just like that, I fell asleep, for my first fully restful sleep in nine months.
It was short-lived, but I woke up feeling much better. Henry had stayed with me on the couch the whole time, and I wrapped myself around him and he kissed me lightly on the cheek.
"Did you miss me Aiden?" He asked playfully, I nodded.
Henry put his arm around me now, and I cuddled up close to him. I could feel his familiar form, the body that I had missed for so long had finally come back...
"Henry... don't leave me..." I whispered, and I don't know if he heard me, but his arm pulled me closer yet he said nothing.
The afternoon was spent on the couch, with Henry finally remembering that he was trying to cook me some scrambled eggs and went back to the kitchen to make a third attempt. Suffice it to say, the eggs never made it onto a plate and I ended up waiting until dinner time to eat.
Henry took me out to dinner at our favorite little eatery on the north side of town. I told him of all the things that I had done during his absence. I told him of all the things that I had thought about. I even told him about the car accident. He scolded me for putting myself in danger and for not telling him about it sooner.
"But Henry... that's going to be my job... I have to save the lives of the people who need me..." "You could do it from the safety of a hospital... What if that car had exploded or the people weren't as nice as they ended up being? What if you had gotten hurt? I wouldn't have been here and I wouldn't have known until someone called me to let me know that you were okay" He scolded me some more.
"You know Aiden... the thing I missed most... was your eyes, the way you look at me... the way they sparkle when we're sitting together at this table with the candles... so as soon as that deal finished, I came home... I came home to you..."
He held my hand in his now as we left, getting into the car I had a flash of the car accident but feeling his hand squeeze mine, I felt better. It didn't scare me anymore. Henry drove us home now, and he told me that we had better get some rest, I had to go back to school again and he had to attend a presentation meeting to update the company on the details of the deal.
In bed, for a brief moment when I lay there I turned back to my side and curled up again, it was only then that I realized that tonight, I had Henry back in my life again. The bathroom door opened and there stood my boyfriend shirtless and in sweatpants. He climbed in and frowned a bit when I simply stared at him.
"What is it?" he chuckled, propping his pillows up "I'd almost gotten used to sleeping alone..." I said softly "Well, that's not going to happen anytime soon okay?" He said, pulling me over and letting my head rest against his chest.
I felt his skin against my own, and when I closed my eyes his heartbeat came through. It was steady, calming, and reassuring. Henry put his hand on the back of my neck and patted me lightly.
"Let's go to bed." He said, and I nodded.
The next day I threw on my scrubs and drove to school. Jason had cornered me for any "juicy" details of my night with Henry, of course, I had none to share, but he didn't believe me. We had our classes in the morning and in the afternoon I threw on my white coat and entered clinic for my round.
Today, there was a 43yo female, who complained of dizzy spells, refer to neurology after workup. Then came my last patient... the chart seemed familiar to me and I didn't get to look at the patient's name before I was called to the front desk to complete my referral form. As I turned in the paperwork, my pager beeped to let me know my next patient was here.
"L-Landon..." I sputtered a little. "Hi Aiden" He smiled. "Uh-Um." "I think, we should go back to the exam room..." he said. "Yeah.. this way..." I ushered him back.
We entered my exam room and he sat down on the bench, his eyes met mine and I faltered a little.
"So I hear, Henry's back in town..." he started "Yes, he came home last night." "That fire in Paris must have been easier to put out than I thought." "Did you... do that on purpose?" "Of course not... it was just business..." His tone seemed to betray the innocent nature of his words.
Landon was in for an annual checkup so I tried my best to run through the tests as quickly as possible. He, however, insisted on taking his time to answer my questions and took every opportunity to make things difficult for me.
"You know Aiden, we should catch up sometime... how about... tonight?" "I... have plans..." I said quietly, looking at the chart and writing down my findings. "Oh c'mon, you're still a terrible liar. You know Aiden, we used to be friends..." "Landon, it's... not appropriate to ask your doctor out on a date." I said, saying the first thing that came to mind. "Well, then stop being my doctor for a second, I'm asking my friend." "Landon..." "Or would it make Henry uncomfortable? I suppose I should... take that into account." "Landon stop." "If you want, I can make things difficult for him and send him out on another trip." "Landon! Stop!" "Then come have coffee with me, or else I wont leave." He was persistent. "Fine. ONE cup." I said. "I'll be here to pick you up when you get off of clinic duty." "No thanks, I'll drive myself." I said sternly "Well, suit yourself... but Aiden... lets just keep it close, between the two of us, we don't want Henry to have any... other concerns on his mind." He said as he buttoned up his shirt and left the room.
My hands were trembling when he left, but I had to come to my senses. I went after him, escorting him to the front desk and handing the charts back to the receptionist. After he left, I learned that he had called and asked specifically for me. He had insisted that I be the intern to handle his exam and that he would require a "in depth" physical.
I toyed with the idea of letting Henry know what had just happened, but thought the better of it. It was just one cup of coffee... right?
When I finished for the day, my coat found its way back into my locker and I sighed as I changed into my day clothes and walked outside. Unfortunately for me, Landon had remembered our meeting, he was waiting for me at the coffee shop and I sat down at the small table he had reserved.
"What do you want Landon?" I asked "My my, I just wanted to... catch up with an old friend." "Landon, if what you said is true, you're not my friend. I don't even know why I'm here." "Well... then let me start. Remember when we were little, and the three of us used to play together? You, me, and Henry? Do you remember how Henry had everything... handed to him?" "Landon, Henry didn-" "Do you remember how when we were growing up, how much I liked you?" "L-Landon... I didn't k-" "Of course you didn't know, because Henry had taken you away by then..." "No, Landon, stop. I didn't know. I really didn't, because when we were little, I stayed far away from both of you... I had to. I was told to stay away from the heirs, from you and Henry." "Don't lie to protect him Aiden." "I'm not, Landon, I was just the son of a secretary, back then, my family didn't have anything. But you... and Henry... both had money, had companies to take over... My father and I had nothing, we were making enough money to live... we were so different, how could I have even gotten close to you?" "But now... you're with him aren't you? You're still the son of a secretary, and you're still with him." "Landon, it's not what you think..." "You know what I think? I think that Henry stole you away from me, because of course, the great Henry Kim just has everything he ever wanted. Well what about me though? Aiden, I can be all of that for you now, I have the resources, I have my father's company." "It's not about the money, I-" "I can provide for you now..." "Landon... I'm not with Henry for the money..." "Then you should have no problem coming to me!" I couldn't believe the words that were coming out of his mouth. Some part of me felt incredibly offended, and the other incredibly frustrated.
I took a moment to compose myself, Landon had his eyes still focused on me.
"Landon, I'm not with Henry because of his money, because of his company, or any of that." "Then why are you with him!?" "Because I love him..." "Because he made you think that you love him, but he stole you away from me... I loved you so much when we were little, but you went with him instead!" "No... I didn't... I didn't go with him, I didn't choose him over you. I stayed away from both of you because that was what was expected of me. He came to me, Landon. He came to me." "Then I want you to give me that chance, give me the chance to win you back." "Landon! I'm not some... trophy that you can just compete for!" "Aiden... I loved you so much, I liked you since the minute we met, but why, why did you have to go with Henry instead of me? Now that I can finally be everything that you need, why cant you come to me?" "Because... you're not what I need now... Henry is what I need. Henry is who I love, and Henry is who I have now." By now, I could see that anything I said to him was falling on deaf ears.
"I'm sorry Landon, I really am, but please, stop making things difficult on Henry, and don't come to me again with this... I do want to be your friend, but not... like this." I said, standing up.
"If you leave now... I cant promise that Henry's life will get any easier." He said quietly. "Landon... stop."
I left the café and looked at him through the window. He looked as if he were still boiling with anger, and I didn't know what to do other than get home.
When I arrived and parked my car, I found Henry sitting in his study and I jumped into his arms. I gave him a hug and he chuckled a bit at my "sudden affection" and asked me what was going on. I took a deep breath and made the decision to tell him what I should have a few hours ago.
"Henry... I have something to tell you..."
--- Author: Thank you so much for sticking with me! I love hearing from you all and if you have any suggestions or comments, please feel free to let me know at Keito.Nakagawa@gmail.com.
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