Afflecktion

Okay everyone, here are the long awaited seventh and eighth parts of Afflecktion. I know I've been unbelievably slow in getting these out, but hopefully you'll understand and break up the lynch mob...lol. I hope this is worth the wait, and I want everyone to know that I only plan about two more chapters after these two. I've really loved and appreciated all the positive responses I've gotten so far, and I hope you guys keep them coming. My e-mail address is MindPieces samuraisupremo@hotmail.com. Enjoy!

Afflecktion- Part 7

Matt's words seemed to hang in the air long after he let them out, which was something his words had a tendency to do since I first met him. The room was silent for a few moments. I was speechless, Ben was speechless, and Matt was sitting across from us, awaiting some sort of reply. Ben was the first to speak up.

"Are you sure?" It was a question that sounded somewhat ridiculous under the circumstances, but I found myself wondering the same thing.

"I'm positive. I know this isn't the greatest time to do this, but it's been killing me lately." Matt seemed to let out a sigh of relief as he talked, probably over the fact that neither of us had exploded in anger...yet.

"Matt," Ben continued, "I don't know what to say. You know that we went through this already, about six months ago. We broke up for some very intelligent reasons remember?"

"I know...like the fact that a relationship was tough to handle once we got famous, and the fact that if we continued it could ruin our friendship someday. But Ben, I want the chance. I'm willing to jump in and put my career and our friendship on the line, I think it's worth the difficulties."

Before Ben could say anything, I decided it was time for me to throw my two cents in. I was in a whirlwind of emotions at the time...feeling anger, confusion, shock, and mostly like a third wheel.

"Excuse me Matt," I said, reintroducing myself to the conversation. "But why did you decide to drop this bombshell with me here?" There was an underlying sense of hostility in my voice.

"Because I like you David," Matt said slowly, trying to judge exactly what I was feeling. The truth was that even I didn't know that. "I tried not to, I tried to see you as the enemy, and I couldn't do it. You've been so nice to me, and I think you have a right to know this information. You're involved."

"Matt..." Ben chimed in, running his hands through his hair. I could read the look of distress on his face. "I've had relationships with a few guys since we broke up, and this never came up. I feel so stupid that I didn't even see this coming."

"You're not the only one," I said, burying my face in my hands.

"I didn't really feel like this before Ben." Matt paused, looking down at the couch to gather his thoughts. "When I saw you with those guys, I knew you didn't love them. It was just dating for the sake of dating, and that was fine. But the first time I saw you with David..." Matt hesitated, I could tell he was choking up. "I saw the way you used to look at me." I could see a tear roll down his face as he looked up from the couch.

The room went silent again for a moment, and I realized that I felt like crying myself. I could understand where Matt was coming from...not being able to fall out of love with Ben was something I could relate to. But I was scared. Deep down somewhere, I was convinced Ben would go to him and that would be it. Matt Damon or me? Hmmmm...wouldn't be a tough choice for most people.

Ben got up from beside me and walked over to Matt, sitting by him and putting his arm around his shoulders to comfort him. I suddenly had the feeling that I just lost the battle.

"Don't cry Matt, Jesus don't do that. You'll have this turning into a Barbara Walters interview before we know it," Ben said with a smile. Matt let out a small laugh and wiped the tears from his eyes.

"This was stupid of me wasn't it?" Matt asked, looking at both of us. It was me who answered this time.

"Stupid to make up the stuff about Winona, yes. But stupid to tell the truth? No, not really." I gave Matt a look as I said this that let him know I wasn't pissed about the whole situation.

"Listen Matt," Ben said soothingly as he kept his arm around him. "I love you, I always have. And I always will. We've always had this indescribable bond between us, since I was like 8 years old. I think of you as a brother basically. But that brotherly love I feel for you just doesn't translate into the other kind, and I think deep down you know that. Right?"

"I guess so...but I just hoped...you know."

"I know," Ben replied, understanding what he was feeling even when he didn't speak it. It was a phenomenon that only occurred after years of knowing somebody. "There's nothing wrong with hoping, you have a right to that. Cause someday Matt...very soon, somebody is going to walk into your life and they'll see everything I see in you, and then some. They'll see how beautiful you are, how smart, loyal, and amazing. It would take a blind guy not to notice all that."

I watched as Matt smiled and nodded his head, which made me feel better. The fear that Ben was going to run from me had subsided, and now I wondered what ever brought it up to begin with. My insecurities could get the best of me sometimes.

"I want you to know that I'm not jealous or anything Ben," Matt replied. "I'm happy for you, and for David. I mean that."

"I know you do," Ben said with a smile. "Just no more hiding things from us okay? We're your friends, you can tell us how you feel any time. Right David?"

"Yeah of course," I chimed in. "Morning, noon or night, I don't care."

"You guys are great. I know I have to move on, and believe me I've been working on it. I think telling you all of this helped."

"So you're sure you're all right?" Ben asked. "No more secrets, no more fears, no more bombshells?"

"I promise, none of the above."

"Good, cause I'm exhausted. I'm gonna go crash, okay buddy?"

"Okay," he replied. I watched as Ben wrapped his arms around Matt and gave him a reassuring hug before standing up off the couch. He walked past me, giving me a nod to join him when I was ready. The bedroom door closed a moment later, and I was left in an awkward silence with Matt.

"So are you upset?" Matt asked as he crossed the room and sat next to me.

"No...still kind of surprised I guess. Are you upset?"

"No, it's mostly relief. It's good not to be holding that in anymore."

"But...I mean..." I hesitated, trying to word my question properly. "Doesn't it bother you that he...you know, chose me?"

Matt let out a sigh, not replying right away. I was afraid I hit a nerve I shouldn't have.

"Have you ever fallen for somebody you can't have David?"

"Oh yeah, I used to be famous for that. I could name off the straight boys if I thought about it."

"Then you probably understand that when you love somebody...whether you have them or not...you want them to be happy. You make Ben happy David. The way he lights up around you...it's a beautiful thing, and it makes me feel good to see him that way. So no, it doesn't upset me."

"We have more in common than I thought," I replied. "Thanks for being so honest with me, I really respect that."

"And thank you for understanding, instead of bashing my face in or something," Matt said, half serious.

"Oh please, I've never thrown a punch in my life," I said with a laugh. "It's not my style."

"Lucky for me," Matt said jokingly. "you could probably kick my ass."

"Well, maybe next time." I smiled and gave Matt a hug, glad to see that things were getting back to normal. "I better get to bed, it's back to work in the morning."

"Oh right" Matt said as we broke the hug. "How'd your big first day go?"

"It was great...I remembered everything you told me and it was a breeze."

"Except for that little incident with Gwyneth right?" Matt said, laughing.

"Hey! That wasn't funny at the time...but now that you mention it, I guess it was a crack up. You don't know embarrassment until a superstar actress has walked in on you naked."

"Oh, I can imagine," Matt replied. "I'll see you in the morning."

I gave Matt a pat on the back and got up, heading down the hallway to the closed bedroom door. I felt as if I had been in some sort of hurricane in the last twenty-four hours...with all the stress from the film, the Gwyneth incident, and now this piling up on top of me. I was definitely ready for a good night's sleep, and I hoped to wake up to find all the problems of the past day washed away.

I walked in the room and saw that Ben was lying in bed in his boxers, reading some magazine. Once again, for no obvious reason, it hit me that we still hadn't talked about the fact that I was leaving in a week. It was something I knew was brewing in both our minds, but neither of us wanted to deal with it. Tonight certainly wasn't the night for it anyway.

"So how'd it go?" Ben asked as I sat on the side of the bed, removing my shoes and socks.

"Really well actually, there's no hard feelings." I stood up for a moment and dropped my jeans and removed my shirt, leaving me in my briefs as I sat back down. "You must have a lot on your mind."

"Well yeah," Ben replied as he put the magazine down. "I feel like some sort of failure as a friend or something."

"You what? That's ridiculous." I got up and flipped off the light, then crawled under the covers and let my head hit the pillow.

"I just feel like I should have known sooner. Here Matt was going through all this pain and I was just oblivious to it. I just never wanted to be one of those guys."

"One of what guys?" I asked, confused by the comment.

"Those guys who get in a relationship and ditch all their friends in the process. I watched people do that all through high school, and I vowed that I wouldn't, especially with Matt."

"Listen Ben," I said as I wrapped my arm around him and rubbed his naked back. "I'd never ask you to ditch your friends, and if I thought you were doing that, I'd probably slap you upside the head. You were just busy and preoccupied, but the second you found out something was wrong with Matt, you talked to him about it. That's what friends do."

I heard Ben let out a sigh and I felt him place his hand on my own back.

"Yeah I guess you're right. I just hope Matt sees it the same way."

"He does, I'm sure of it. Now just don't worry about it anymore, I think it's time everything was peaceful."

"This is the only time everything is peaceful," Ben replied. "When you're here next to me. Without you here..." he hesitated for a moment, as the thought ran through both our minds. "I don't know what I'd do."

"Goodnight Ben." I leaned over and gave him a kiss before resting my head next to his.

"Goodnight David."

I woke up early the next morning, a swirl of thoughts from the previous evening still running through my mind. I hadn't slept very well, but Ben seemed perfectly content as I looked at him curled up next to me. I gave him a kiss on the forehead and groggily got out of bed, heading out of there and into the front room.

The sunrise was creeping through the windows as I sat down on the couch. I looked at the clock. 5:15. No sane person would be up this early. Except maybe Mariette, who I hadn't talked to since I got the role in the film. I picked up the phone and dialed the number...I was relieved when she picked up after a few rings.

"Hello?" she asked, sounding alive but hardly perky.

"Guess who."

"Ummm...Ed McMahon, ready to give me my millions and save me from this dismal waitressing job I have to head to in ten minutes?"

"Actually no. It's your big famous movie star friend...I thought I'd get in touch with the little people," I said with a laugh.

"What are you doing up this early anyway?"

"I couldn't sleep last night, too much on my mind. I didn't tell you about my movie role yet."

"What movie role?" she asked, sounding confused.

"I got a small part in Ben's movie, Twisted Innuendo. I get to play a murder suspect."

"You mean like a real role?? That's amazing! Someday I'll send pictures of you to that cheesy VH1 'Before They Were Stars' show."

"Yeah right," I said, letting out a laugh.

"Will you be finished filming before you come home next week?"

There it was, my reality check. Home was a mere six days away.

"Yeah, I'll wrap up in a few days I think. Oh, and Rick's gay."

"Rick's WHAT?" she screamed, almost making me drop the phone as I started laughing.

"Gay...just like every other man you know." I teased.

"Oh shut up. I can't believe that! And he's such a Tasty boy too!"

"I know, isn't it torture? For you girls anyway."

"Why is every man I know gay?? I'm like a magnet for you people!"

I couldn't help but laugh at Mariette's ironic misfortune, just as she had done in the past years when every guy I fell for was straight. If we didn't have each other to laugh at, and bitch to, we'd probably go crazy.

"Any more bombshells you want to drop? You go on vacation for a few weeks and the whole world spins off it's axis."

"Nope, that's it for now," I replied, stifling my laughter.

"Anyway, moving on," she sighed. "What is so stressful in the life of an up and coming movie star who is in love with one of the most sought after men in Hollywood? What's waking you up so early?"

"It's exactly what you just mentioned actually. Coming home next week." I let out a deep breath, waiting for some words of wisdom.

"Have you and Ben talked about this yet?" she asked, sounding concerned.

"Well...not exactly." I knew how ridiculous it sounded the moment I let it out.

"So you're leaving in six days and you haven't even discussed it yet? He knows you're leaving right?"

"Well yeah, of course he knows that part." I could feel her hesitation and frustration on the other end of the line as she gathered her thoughts.

"You always do this you know."

"Do what?" I asked.

"You avoid reality like it's the plague. You surround yourself with all the happy thoughts and try to ignore the ones that are upsetting. Isn't that why you haven't talked to him about this?"

"I don't know...I mean, I guess I hoped he'd ask me to stay. I just don't want to bring it up, cause it'll upset me, and it'll upset him..." I trailed off as I lost my thoughts.

"And you don't want to be upset, my point exactly. But you HAVE to talk to him about this David. You can't just up and leave without discussing the consequences and the future. Okay?"

"I know all this already." I got up off the couch and started pacing with the phone, something I do when I get overwhelmed in a conversation. "I think I just needed a good kick in the ass to get it started."

"Well that's what I'm here for. But now I need to get to work. Heaven forbid those eighty year old bastards don't get their cup of coffee at exactly 6 AM."

"Okay," I said with a laugh. "You show those old men who's boss."

"I plan to. And I also plan to be picking you up at the airport at about 11 AM on Wednesday. If that changes, give me a call."

"I will...and thank you by the way. Send me my bill in the mail."

"Trust me David, you've run up a therapy tab you'll never be able to pay. At least not until those movie star millions start rolling in."

"Right, that'll be any day now," I said sarcastically. "Talk to you later."

"Okay, bye."

With that I hung up the phone and crept back in the bedroom, crawling in next to Ben. I had more confidence now about talking to him, and I knew it would happen soon. But not yet. I closed my eyes and let myself drift back off into a calm sleep.

Afflecktion- Part 8

Three days after my chat with Mariette I finished up my work on the set. It hadn't been a lengthy experience, but it had been a wonderful one, and it certainly taught me many things. Acting was something I seemed to feel comfortable doing, which was a shock to me, since the mere thought of an oral report back in high school sent waves of hysteria running over my body. It must have been that desire to escape reality...to be someone else for a while, that drew me in.

As the sun set I said my goodbyes to the cast and crew, saving a couple people for last. I made sure to thank Anthony for all of his help with casting me and teaching me the ropes of the part. He said that he'd be sure to see me at the Oscars, and that we'd definitely work together again someday. Suddenly I felt like I was some heavy Hollywood player, despite the fact that all I'd done was a small role in a film that wasn't even released yet.

The final person I went to say goodbye to was Gwyneth. I approached her last partly out of awkwardness and embarrassment from the incident earlier in the week, and partly because I felt a stronger bond with her than I did with any of the other cast or crew members. I wasn't sure if our unspoken bond was because she was Ben's close friend, or due to the fact that she was one of the few women to have seen me naked.

"Hi Gwyneth," I said as I approached her.

"Hey David...so this is it huh?" she asked.

"For this place and time, I think so. But I'm sure we'll meet again."

"I'm sure of it. You did some amazing work for a first timer, and I'm not just saying that."

"Thanks, I appreciate it. So until next time?" I took Gwyneth's hand in mine and gave her a nice professional handshake, acting as though the flashing ceremony had never taken place.

"It was nice working with you David. Would you like some parting advice?"

"Of course."

"On your next film...remember to LOCK your trailer door."

The moment she said this I turned beet red and busted up laughing, just as she did the same. I felt embarrassed, but was glad we could joke about it.

"I'll remember that," I said as I walked away, still giggling.

As I walked out into the evening air I saw Ben sitting in his jeep awaiting my arrival. I hopped in and let out a long sigh, exasperated from the work, as well as the string of goodbyes I had just gone through.

"How'd it go?" Ben asked as he hit the gas and started to drive.

"Great," I replied as I kicked back, getting comfortable. "It was kind of sad saying goodbye to everyone, even though I hadn't known them very long."

"Goodbyes can be tough," Ben said, hesitating afterwards as the thought sank into both of our minds. "Even when you haven't known somebody that long."

It was at this moment that I saw a perfect opportunity to bring up exactly what I had been avoiding for the past couple weeks. It was a wide open space, begging to be filled with the one subject that had been plaguing my mind. Yet for some reason, I skipped right over it as Ben drove in the direction opposite the house.

"Where are you going?" I asked, taking Ben's free hand in mine as he drove.

"We're going to celebrate your first wrapped motion picture, where did you think we'd be going?" Ben asked with a sly smile.

"Oh I see, so this is a surprise. Where are you taking me?"

"If I told you that it wouldn't be a surprise...so sit down, shut up, and hold on."

"Funny, that's the same thing you said in bed last night," I said with a laugh. Looking out the window all I could see were trees on either side of us and not a car in sight...I had no clue what he had in mind.

About ten minutes later Ben turned on to a smaller road that went into the woods on the left side of us. He finally stopped in a large clearing, shutting the car off and turning to me with that famous smile. It was a beautiful spot, looking out over the lights of Los Angeles and making the city appear much more peaceful than it normally did.

"Okay...either you're going to reenact a bad 80's horror movie out here, or you have something romantic in mind," I said, returning his smile.

"Get out of the jeep and I'll grab my hockey mask," Ben said with a laugh.

I followed his lead as he got out of the vehicle and walked around to the back, opening it up. The air was just right, almost exactly how it had been that night on the beach, which seemed so long ago. I almost wished I was back in that moment, when there didn't seem to be any sort of time limits, no big, pressing issues to discuss. Just Ben and I, pure and simple.

As I peered into the back of the jeep I saw all sorts of supplies that I hadn't noticed while we were driving. Some sleeping bags, an ice chest, picnic basket, the works.

"You're taking me camping to celebrate?" I asked...a little confused but pleasantly surprised.

"Sort of yeah," Ben replied as he unloaded the supplies and set them on the grass. "I know it's traditional to go party at some club or get trashed after you finish a movie...but who needs tradition?"

"Not me." I walked over and sat on one of the sleeping bags, kicking my shoes and socks off. I ran my toes through the grass as Ben sat down next to me, making himself comfortable and grabbing the picnic basket.

"This place is beautiful isn't it?" he asked, looking around and taking in the lush green of our surroundings.

"Not nearly as beautiful as the man next to me," I replied with a smile. I leaned over and gave Ben a passionate kiss on the lips as he opened the basket of food.

"You always make me feel so amazing David. You say one thing and my heart leaps up, like I'm in high school all over again."

"Same here...of course for me, high school was like two years ago."

"Yeah yeah, make me feel old," Ben said, laughing. I watched as he pulled two separate tupperware containers out of the basket, as well as silverware. "And I brought fettuccini alfredo, since I know that's your thing."

"Awww you cooked, I love that in a man you know."

"I know, so just call me Martha Stewart," he laughed. "And let's not forget this." Ben reached into the cooler and pulled out a bottle of champagne, popping the cork and pouring some for me into the plastic cups he brought along.

"Oh yes, the alcohol. Very VERY important." I took a sip from the cup and looked up at the stars. "This is perfect," I said as I wrapped my arm around Ben's back. "You here, the cool night air, the stars, the lights down below, the food....this is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me."

"It's the least I can do for the man of my dreams. So let's eat shall we?"

We sat in that same spot for a good two hours, eating, drinking, talking, looking out at the city, and then drinking some more. It was great to be away from the house and away from the problems we had faced in there, even if those issues had now subsided. Still, considering that I only had about two full days left with Ben, I wanted every moment to be as peaceful as possible.

"You know what I've always wanted to do?" Ben asked, looking over at me as he took a sip of champagne. The bottle we had opened was down to a few final drops.

"What's that?"

"I've always wanted to make love under the stars."

I couldn't help but let out a laugh, which caused some of the liquid I was swallowing to spray out of my mouth.

"How drunk are you? Have you forgotten our first time already?"

"Our first time?" Ben asked, playing dumb. "Hmmm...nope, doesn't ring a bell. What was your name again?"

"Okay smart ass, that's it," I replied as I set my cup down and lunged on him, playfully tackling him on to the grass. We started rolling around and wrestling until we were a few feet from where we started on the sleeping bag. Of course he ended up with the advantage and pinned me...not that I was one to object.

"Awww now look at that," Ben said as he smiled down at me, holding my arms. "You have grass stains all over your clothes...better take them off."

"Well I can't do that with you on top of me," I replied, giving him a devilish grin. "But maybe I can get yours off for you."

I quickly pulled Ben's shirt off over his head and tossed it in the grass, leaving him straddling me half naked. I took my hands and ran them over his chest, through the hairs there...stopping to play with his nipples.

"I forgot to finish my sentence last time," Ben whispered as he leaned down close to me. "I meant to say I've always wanted to make love under the stars AGAIN."

With that he had me sit up as he pulled my shirt over my head, throwing it somewhere near his in the grass. He laid down on top of me, our bodies pressing together as our lips touched. I could feel the warmth of Ben's mouth as our still clothed crotches grinded against each other...my hands were running all along his back, and his through my hair. It only took a moment before I could feel his hard on waiting to be released.

"I want you so much David," Ben said as he climbed off of me and started undoing my pants. He had me naked in a flash, and I could suddenly feel the chill of the grass against my legs and ass. I sat up and removed his jeans, leaving us both naked and rock hard under the moonlight.

"Just lay back Ben, let me do some of the work for now."

Ben willingly followed my orders and relaxed in the grass as I crawled on top of him. My lips pressed against his, and then moved lower, down his neck. I could feel the tickle of his stubble, something I always loved to play with whenever we would lay in bed together.

I could hear Ben start to moan as my tongue made it's way down his chest and to each one of his nipples, circling each one until it was hard. His hands ran along my neck and my back, touching me wherever he could as I made my way lower.

"Should I go lower?" I asked, teasing Ben as my lips kissed down to his belly button.

"You better," he replied with a laugh.

I moved my body into a 69 position, straddling Ben so my cock was right above his face. I opened wide and took him inside me, moving my tongue and my lips up and down his shaft. He let out a huge moan and then engulfed me, making my knees weak as he worked me over with his expert mouth. My hands massaged his balls and ran through his dark bush of pubic hair, feeling every inch of him. Our bodies and our hearts were so intertwined that it almost felt as if we were one.

"Ohhh shit David," Ben moaned, taking his mouth off my cock. "I think I could cum."

"Not yet."

"Why not?" he asked, sounding slightly disappointed as I crawled off of him and laid on my stomach in the grass.

"Because you've never fucked me under the stars...not even that first night," I replied with a grin.

"Mmmmm...well your wish is my command."

I could feel Ben crawling behind me, placing his hands on either side of me as he positioned himself. I lifted my ass in the air and felt him spreading my cheeks apart.

"Are you ready?" he whispered as he leaned over my back, his lips just inches from my ear. I turned my head and kissed him softly.

"Yes."

Ben's lips started pressing against my back as he pushed the head of his cock inside me. I felt pain and pleasure both at the same time, and while it was hardly something I was used to yet, I loved it. My moans filled the air as he filled up more and more of me, until finally I could feel the touch of his pubic hair against my body.

I started moving my body and wiggling my ass as he began his thrusts inside me. I could feel the underside of my cock rubbing against the grass, and soon Ben was going wild. Pounding me...somehow managing to find that delicate balance between firmness and gentleness that made my body beg for more.

"I love you Ben...damn I love you so much."

"I love you too David, more than anything." Ben grabbed my throbbing cock, stroking me as I started thrusting myself against his hand. "I think I'm gonna blow, and I don't think you're going to stop it this time," he laughed.

"Go for it."

The pounding Ben was doing suddenly increased in speed and I could feel the electricity running through my entire body. My moans got louder, no doubt echoing throughout the woods by now and confusing some other campers at a far away clearing. Ben stroked me faster, and suddenly I felt the surge from my balls as my load exploded, all over the grass in front of me, as well as Ben's hand.

He let out one last moan from behind me before I could feel his warmth covering my insides. The moment seemed to last forever, even as I felt Ben collapse on top of me, his breathing heavy in my ear. I turned my head and gave him the most passionate kiss, trying my best to convey all the warmth and beauty I felt inside at that instant. It was something that words couldn't express.

"That was amazing," Ben sighed as he moved off of me and laid on my side, where we could see each other's eyes.

"Amazing doesn't even begin to cover it," I replied, running my hand over his face.

"But now look at you," he smiled. "You've got grass stains EVERYWHERE."

I let out a laugh, wondering what a mess I must look like.

"Let's just hope we don't have to explain this to Matt and Casey in the morning."

We stayed pretty silent for the next thirty minutes or so, as we crawled in to our separate sleeping bags and curled up next to each other. We were both on our backs, looking up at the stillness and beauty of the stars. Suddenly, for reasons I couldn't understand, the subject I was avoiding seemed to leap through me. It was time to let it out.

"Ben?" I asked quietly, not sure if he was still awake next to me.

"Yes?" he replied.

"Why haven't you asked me to stay?" I asked, the words coming out so much easier than they had when I ran the situation through my head.

"What?" he replied, sounding confused.

"We have two full days left together, and then I'm supposed to leave on Wednesday morning. Do you remember that?"

"It's been the only thing in my mind for the last week or so, I'd definitely say I remember."

I sat up in my sleeping bag and looked down at Ben as I continued.

"Then why haven't you asked me to stay?"

"Because I can't David. You know that."

"Why? I don't understand."

Ben sat up next to me and took my hand gently in his, squeezing it.

"It's not because I don't want you to. Every morning I wake up and I see you next to me...sometimes you're just laying there, sleeping so soundly. Then other times you'll be tossing and turning a bit more." A smile started to form on Ben's face as he continued. "I love watching you like that, completely unaware of how beautiful and adorable you are. I live for those mornings."

I smiled and blushed a bit, loving Ben's words, but I wasn't sure where this conversation was going.

"So what is it?" I asked.

"Do you remember the other night, when you told me you'd never ask me to give up my friends for you, and if I did you'd slap me upside the head?"

"Yes," I replied.

"Well if I asked you to stay here with me, it would be like asking you to sacrifice your entire future. Your school, your friends, your family, your job...ALL of that is back in Vegas David. I love you too much to let you do that."

"But Ben, NONE of that stuff is as important as you. I'd give it all up in a second if I had to."

"Well you can't David, and I'm not going to ask you to. It'd be selfish of me to keep you all to myself when you have so much left to do with the world. College to finish, a career to start, friends to support, you have it all."

"So we're on different paths, that's what you're saying." It wasn't so much a question, but a reality that I had finally said out loud.

"For now I think we are," Ben replied as he wrapped his arm around my back. "But I think as far as eternity goes, we're both in the same place."

I buried my head in my hands and could feel tears welling up in my eyes as Ben hugged me closer.

"I love you Ben, more than I'll ever be able to say."

"I love you too David. And sometimes I hate the fact that what I say can never actually give you the extent of what I feel. I've never met anyone who has made me even half the man I am when I'm with you. I just..." Ben trailed off, losing whatever words were coming to his mind.

"I know Ben. I know."

We drove home the next morning in near silence, our clothes covered in grass stains and probably smelling pretty funky from the evening before. Neither of us discussed the conversation that we had, but it was obviously the only thing on our minds. As much as it killed me, I understood Ben's point. It was like some cruel cosmic joke, bringing us together at a time when our paths were ready to divide.

As we made our way back into town, Ben told me that he wanted to make some plans the following evening for my big send off. He thought it'd be fun if the two of us, along with Matt, Casey, Jeff, and Rick, all got together and partied the night away. It was a good idea, and I thought it'd be a good way to say goodbye to all of my friends at the same time.

"This will be a perfect opportunity..." I mumbled, half to myself as my mind suddenly hit an epiphany of sorts.

"For what?" Ben asked.

"Well...I was thinking of playing matchmaker actually..." I replied with a sly grin on my face.

"Oh no, what are you thinking?"

"Don't you think Matt and Rick would be perfect together?" I asked as the wheels in my mind began to turn. "They're both single, they're both gay..."

"You'll have to think of a better reason than that," Ben said with a laugh. "Trust me, just because they're both single and gay means next to nothing."

"I know that, but they're both nice people...loyal, smart, big hearted. Come on, you KNOW it's a good idea."

"It certainly couldn't hurt," Ben admitted after listening to my reasoning. "I think they both deserve somebody, even if they end up just being friends."

"So it's a date then. But we won't tell them they're being set up...just introduce them and see what happens." I rubbed my hands together, content with the little plot I was cooking up.

"Can I call you Chuck Woolery from now on?"

"Oh shut up and drive," I laughed.

We arrived back at the house about a half an hour later, and thankfully Matt and Casey had left, which meant there was no need to explain the condition we were in. Ben and I hopped in the shower together, washing each other off, yet trying our best not to get ourselves too riled up. Ben had to go to the set for the rest of the day and couldn't be late, so we simply got ourselves clean and got out.

I hung out around the house for the rest of the day after Ben headed to work, promising him that I'd give Jeff and Rick a call and invite them to our goodbye party the next night. It was around five that afternoon when I finally sat down and picked up the phone, dialing up the boys.

"Hello." It was Jeff who answered.

"Hey straight boy," I said with a laugh. "What's up?"

"Well if it isn't our big actor friend," he said mockingly, "making a call to his adoring fans. I was wondering if we'd hear from you before Wednesday."

"You knew you would...I won't completely forget about you until the movie comes out."

"Oh thanks," Jeff said laughing.

"Actually I wanted to know if you guys could go out with the four of us tomorrow night. It's sort of a goodbye party I guess."

"Awww, leaving so soon huh?" Jeff said, without a twinge of sarcasm this time.

"Yeah, it looks that way. I guess we're going to meet at that club Snug Harbor, around eightish. Sound good to you?"

"Sounds perfect, and I don't think Rick is busy with anything either. Are you doing okay? How's the movie shoot coming?"

"I wrapped up yesterday, and I think the movie itself wraps in about a week or so. It should be out by year's end I hear."

"Just in time for Oscar consideration I see."

"Oh don't you jump on that train of optimism too," I replied jokingly. "The movie isn't even out yet."

"But I have faith in you, what can I say."

"Well I appreciate that. So I'll see you guys tomorrow night right? Cause it's my last chance to say goodbye."

"We'll be there," Jeff promised. "And if Rick is busy, I'll just kidnap him and throw him in the car."

"Sounds good to me. I'll see you then."

"See ya David."

The next night seemed to arrive faster than I wanted it to, which was usually the case with life. When you want something to last, it moves faster. Ben had talked to Matt and Casey, who both agreed to come along, and the four of us were all running around the house, trying to get ready so we wouldn't be late. I made sure that Matt wore something that looked especially good, even though I refused to tell him why. I just explained that it was my duty, as a friend, to be his fashion coordinator.

Ben and I were getting our shoes on in the bedroom, both of us excited about the night out, but also dreading it. This was going to be our last night together and both of us knew it. It's like there was some sort of cloud hanging over us the entire time...a deadline to our entire existence together.

"I went to the airport before work this morning," Ben said as he got off the bed and checked himself in the mirror.

"What for?" I asked, lacing up my shoes and standing next to him.

"Well I bought the seat next to you on your flight home tomorrow. It's round trip and everything...but I just want to get as much time with you as possible."

"Ohhh Ben, you didn't have to do that," I said as I wrapped my arms around him. "You hate to fly."

"I know. Did I tell you that? I don't remember telling you that," he stated, sounding perplexed.

"Actually you didn't, but you mentioned it on The Tonight Show once awhile back. I always pay attention to what you have to say," I said with a smile.

"And I love you for that, amongst other things," Ben replied as he pressed his lips to mine and held me in his arms. "So are we ready to go?"

"Ready as we'll ever be."

The four of us piled in the jeep and headed out on the thirty minute drive to the club. It was supposed to be a nice place, at least that's what the guys kept telling me. I sat in the passenger's seat while Matt and Casey goofed off in the back, making weird faces and generally harassing the cars we passed. I'd never seen so many old ladies with shocked looks on their faces. The entire ride was a crack up...it was like having some comedy duo in the back seat.

When we arrived in the Snug Harbor parking lot I immediately saw Jeff's car, so I knew the guys were inside. I hopped out quickly, excited to see them, and also excited to introduce Matt and Rick. Ben caught up to me as I walked toward the door, with Matt and Casey close behind.

"Remember...UNDERPLAY," he whispered in my ear. "Got that Chuck?"

"Very funny...do you think I'll say something stupid?" I asked, laughing as Ben gave me a look that had YES written all over it.

When we walked in I saw Jeff and Rick sitting at the bar, and I immediately grabbed Matt's arm so he wasn't lagging behind. I pulled him next to me and walked up to them, while Ben followed, looking at me like I belonged in an asylum.

"Hey guys," I said as I popped up behind them.

"Hey!" They exclaimed in unison as they both turned to greet the four of us. I made introductions all around, since neither of them had met Casey or Matt before. I watched handshake after handshake, then finally it came time to introduce my two potential lovebirds.

"Rick, this is Matt," I said as I brought Matt forward, a big goofy smile on my face. "You probably saw him on the Oscars or something last year. And Matt, this is Rick...he's the best single gay guy I know. We're a lot alike, except I'm not single..."

Before I could finish I felt Ben grab my arm and pull me out of the introduction ceremony.

"You call THAT underplaying?" he asked, trying his hardest not to bust up laughing.

"Hey I'm leaving tomorrow...there's no time for underplaying!"

"Well that was about as subtle as an atom bomb. Can the six of us get a table now?"

We all moved from the bar and found a booth, where we ordered dinner and sat and talked for hours. I insisted that Matt and Rick sit next to each other, and when both of them happily obliged I was able to give Ben an 'I told you so' look. I also had Casey and Jeff sit next to each other, assuming it would be fitting since they were the only straight ones at the table. We chatted about everything, and since the party was being held for my sake, there were plenty of 'David's Most Embarrassing Moments' on display. Jeff and Rick recounted the time I flung myself in front of Ben in hilarious detail, and Ben was kind enough to relay the Gwyneth incident to everybody. I felt right at home.

As time passed and everyone got tired of making fun of me, we decided to go boogie down on the dance floor. The drinks had been flowing over the past few hours and I had no rhythm to begin with, but I thought it'd be fun.

Casey and Jeff went to go ask some girls to dance with them, while Ben and I decided to go solo, yet together at the same time. As we walked away I noticed that Matt and Rick were still sitting there talking, so I made a quick jaunt back to the table to check on them.

"Are you guys coming?" I asked, hoping the answer would be no.

"Maybe in a little bit," Rick replied.

"Yeah, give us some time here," Matt said smiling. It was nice to see a smile on his face, especially after all the turmoil we had gone through over the past weeks. I didn't know how things would turn out between the two of them, but I already felt better for giving the idea a try.

I went and made a fool out of myself on the dance floor for a couple hours with the guys before I realized that it was already past midnight. I hated to be a party pooper, but it was time to round everyone up back at the table.

"Okay everyone," I said, standing up in front of the booth as my five friends looked on. "I hate to end the evening so early, but I have to get up at like six A.M. tomorrow so I can pack and all that good shit. You know me, always procrastinating."

"I'm gonna miss you man," Jeff said, being the first to get up. He wrapped his arms around me and I returned the hug, patting him on the back.

"Thanks for a great vacation Jeff. I love you."

"I love you too. And you better call me or I'll kick your ass," he said with a laugh as he stepped aside.

"I'll second that," Rick replied, standing up and hugging me. "The love you thing as well as the ass kicking part. This has been one hell of a few weeks huh?"

"You can say that again. And for some of us it looks to be getting even better," I said, slyly giving a look to Rick then Matt.

The boys walked with us out to the parking lot, where I gave them both hugs again and said my final goodbyes. I was sad to see them go, but I knew they'd still be here for me to visit on a later vacation. I also took notice that Matt and Rick exchanged phone numbers before heading their separate ways...it looked like Operation Love Connection was turning out to be a success.

The four of us piled back in the jeep with Matt driving this time, since he had hardly drank anything all night. He seemed to have been a bit too infatuated with his dinner partner to care about the beer. I planned to tease him about it, but I was too exhausted as Ben and I sat in the back in each other's arms.

I could feel the cool night air as we drove...and with Ben right there, his arms around my waist, I felt like crying. I knew I could just lose it any second...the thought that I would be back home in Las Vegas in under twelve hours was unbearable. It was as if the reality of the situation was finally hitting me. I'd wake up in the morning, I'd pack my things, fly to Vegas with Ben, and then a moment later, he'd get on a plane and head back. For who knows how long...maybe forever.

It was around one in the morning when we finally got home and I said goodnight to Casey and Matt, promising to say goodbye to both of them before I left in the morning. I stumbled into the bedroom with Ben, closing the door behind us and sitting my tired, slightly liquored up body on the bed, where I started to get undressed.

"I had a great time," I said as I took my shirt off and tossed it to the floor. "I'm really going to miss those guys."

"Yeah that was fun," Ben replied as he sat next to me, stripping down to his boxers. "And Matt and Rick seemed to hit it off, much to your internal delight I bet," he said with a smile.

"Well, they did look happy didn't they?"

"Yes, and that's all that matters."

"It could be the start of something beautiful," I said as I took off my jeans and crawled to the head of the bed, slipping under the covers.

"Could be." Ben got up and flipped the light off before joining me under the covers and immediately wrapping his arms around me. "I want you where you belong, this one last night," he whispered as he squeezed me tighter, pulling me against him.

"I love you Ben." My eyes closed and I immediately started to drift off, feeling the warmth of Ben's body against mine.

"I love you too David."

For one instant, in that moment between consciousness and dreams, I forgot about tomorrow. It was just me and Ben, where we belong, in each other's arms. It was one moment that couldn't last forever. I fell asleep.

TO BE CONTINUED....