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A Stepbrother's Desire - Josh and Tyson 45
I heard the voice. "Josh, wake up. Wake up, Josh."
"Am I in the hospital?" I asked in a croaking voice.
"No silly. You're in bed and probably hungover," Ty said with a laugh.
"Oh God, my head!"
"I know. I got you some soda and motrin, here," he said, putting the glass to my face. I took a sip and it was so good. I popped the motrin without delay. Ty was laying down beside me.
"What are you doing?" I asked, rather happy to see him beside me.
"I felt bad for you. I wanted to be here when you woke up."
"Did you help me inside last night?" I asked.
"Yeah. You were like a truck!" and he laughed lightly.
"I bet I was. I was out. Does Mom know how I came home?"
"She does. She came in. You tried to talk to her but..."
"Oh shit, I'm toast," and I groaned.
"No you're not. I told her it was my fault. I told her about my decisions and that you probably just, well, you know..."
"Really? You told her that? Wow. That was nice. Was she mad at me?"
"No, I don't think so. You'll get the sympathy vote today, I think."
"Aw, thank you Ty. How was your match last night?" remembering he had issued a challenge to one of his teammates.
"I won," and he smiled.
"That's great. I really want to sound more excited but you know, my head..."
"It's ok. I understand. Hey, I need to ask you something. I'm not prying. I just need to make sure of something."
"OK, shoot."
"Are you aware of everything that happened last night?"
"Oh shit. What did I do?" wondering what fresh hell I had created in my stupor.
"No, nothing like that. I'm just wondering if you know everything that happened last night while you were partying. Think about it, Josh."
"So, I think so but I don't know."
"Did you hookup with Bryce?" Ty asked and I was shocked beyond belief.
"How did you know?" I asked with another groan.
"You were a little messy down there and I, Josh, it's ok. I just wanted to be sure nothing happened to you while you were passed out. Know what I'm saying?"
"OH! You thought possibly someone did that to me while I was...oh no, nothing like that." but I still felt so ashamed.
"Ok good. Listen Bryce, this is serious. I want it out on the table. I almost had a hook-up last night too. I didn't go looking for it but he charmed me and well...he didn't get very far because he lost his hardon. I got angry with him and I wasn't very nice. I just learned last night that I am in no mood for shitty hook ups. That's not what I was looking for when I asked for space. I'm sorry but I wanted to be honest with you."
"I'm so glad you told me because my thing was terrible too. He was so drunk he couldn't...well, he passed out on top of me, Ty. It was so humiliating," and Ty laughed a bit. "It's why I came home and didn't stay there. I don't want that either. Ok, the first time with Bryce was more thrilling than I let on. But this time, well, I realized I'm just a hole. I might be his friend but sexually, I'm just a piece of ass. I never wanted to be someone's piece of ass, Ty. I'm sorry too but I know how it works now. People think we're free agents and they just want a piece."
"Josh, this was not my plan so I'm glad all that's out in the open. I have made some really cool plans for spring break. I feel like we're lowers because we didn't get to go anywhere for spring break but I have made some arrangements to get out next week. All I really needed was some freedom so that I could get out. Do you understand? I don't want to have to worry all the time."
"Yes I do and I understand more than you know. Ty, I don't have any friends either. Well, none of my own. Just you," and I felt watery.
"Yes you do, what do you mean?" he asked.
"Jack has Tristan, Bryce has Lisa and now Kyle. Kyle is going after Ginny. I don't know, maybe I got what I asked for but I didn't see it coming, where everyone would pair up then move on along leaving me at the bottom of the scale."
"Kyle is going after Ginny? What, he likes her? Didn't see that coming!"
"Yeah he's going to ask her out and ask her to prom. I tried to argue it down but he won out. I didn't have a leg to stand on. I felt useless. And now it seems that Bryce and Kyle are going to be a thing. It's going to be a tug-of-war if I try to vie for Bryce's attention, which is what I was doing last night."
"Josh, relationships are more complicated than we realize. I talked to Tristan and he and I are going to bring our friendship back to the front but that means Tristan is going to have to talk to Jack. Maybe you can get some time with him and Jason next week."
"Yeah, that might be good. I haven't seen Jason in ages. Ty, I'm really sorry about last night. It won't happen again."
"No Josh, I'm really sorry and, yes, it won't happen again. I don't need anyone else's crap. I have enough crap right here," tapping my chest and giggling.
"That was a nice one, Ty, especially since it was at my expense." I was quiet for a moment. :Hey, are we..."
"Josh, I know what you want and I want it too but to do what I need to do in a short period of time, I don't want to feel tied down. I don't want you to feel let down if I'm out or focusing on other people but at the end of everything I'll be right back here. Just a bit of space, that's all. I need to get my energy back again, I want to be in the center, like I used to be. Can you handle it?" He was referring to his "glow" but I didn't tell him I had figured that out.
"Yes, I will do my fucking best. And I won't pressure you with "its just us" and all the other crap. You do `you" and I will be right here. I can definitely live with that," I said, and I was being honest. I wasn't floating anything.
"K, Josh. You know, the more time I spend away from you, the more I wish you were right there with me."
"Same, babe. There is going to come a day, I promise you. A day when I'm not hiding behind everyone's skirts and I'm going to, well, I don't know what. But that day is coming."
"I can't wait for it. Now, I have a serious match this afternoon, my first as third seat!"
"You better take him down! But Ty?"
"What?"
"Please leave his pants up!" and he cracked up laughing and "whap!" a pillow pelted my face.
As Ty got ready to go into the bathroom, I said, "Hey, can you run me over to Bryce's so I can get my things and my car?"
"Absolutely and Josh, thanks for ubering last night. If you had tried to drive, it would have been a disaster."
"I know. Thanks for setting that Uber thing up with my debit card. It was really easy."
Now for the joy of going back and facing that shit show that would be Bryce's house. They were probably having breakfast on the side porch and laughing it up. Fun!
When Ty dropped me off, things were very quiet. I walked through the front door and it was really quiet. In fact, I don't believe anyone had moved. I walked down the center hall to the family room and Kyle was wrapped up warmly in a blanket on the couch. I went back towards the front and walked upstairs, a couple of the stairs creaking under my feet. I entered Bryce's room and his head popped up from the pillow, almost like I had scared him.
"Oh Josh! Whew, you scared me," he laughed.
"You feeling ok?" I asked.
"Fuck, my head hurts," he said.
"Yeah, I Ubered home last night and crashed there. My head is fucked up too."
"You went home? Seriously?" he asked.
"Yeah and I'm glad I did. Listen, Bryce, about last night."
"Dude, I screwed up royally. I know what happened. I'm picturing it right now. I dropped dead on top of you, didn't I?"
"Yep you did but it's ok. It wasn't what I really wanted Bryce."
"What do you mean?" he asked, leaning up on his elbows. I crawled down onto the bed beside him.
"Bryce, I really love you. I love you so much because you have been a huge friend. You know that already. And I'm not going to lie to you or anyone. That weekend on the river was so fucking sexy. I treasure that memory so much. But I don't think our friendship should be based on that. Do you?" and he shook his head without speaking.
"Bryce, I understand what Ty is going through because I have paired everyone up so well, I now don't have many friends of my own. I'm already feeling like things might change with Kyle in the picture. I need you as a friend. I need us to stay friends. Do you get me?"
"Yeah I do. And I have felt the same for a long time. The players from the team have dispersed and they don't have time for me and the underclassmen teammates think we're old and outdated already. I have been clinging on to you for dear life. Didn't you feel it?" he asked.
"Well, no, I thought it was just my charm and good looks," and he rolled his eyes and laughed. "Your head must not hurt as bad as mine," I said.
"Feels like a comet landed on it last night!: he barked. "Seriously, Josh, the quicksand we walk on is getting softer. We have to be vigilant. I need you man, and I totally understand that I don't need to be humping you every time we get together. It's just that, well, I am attracted. I can't help it," and he looked down at his nails, for no particular reason.
"I'm attracted too but I have Ty to think of. I'm getting what he's asking for because we need people besides the one's we're fucking but they're slipping away and the last person I can afford to lose is Ty. The last! Kyle's going after Ginny."
"I know. That took me totally by surprise. Josh, I am so happy Kyle is back. I love him, always have but Josh, you've been front and center this whole year for me. You and me, bud, all the way to the graduation stage. You won't need to fight for my attention and I shouldn't have to fight for yours. Ass or no ass! Is that ok?"
"It better be...OR I'm going to tell everyone that you passed out on top of me and let them figure the rest out," and I chuckled with an evil laugh.
"Bitch!" he screamed. Kyle wandered into the room.
"Hey guys, y'all just getting up?" he asked, with only one eye open! That was hilarious.
I had a light lunch because I didn't want to feel full and heavy this afternoon. I was a little nervous about my talk with Josh. I meant what I said, that last night was foolish. I drove into the club parking lot with my tennis racket and clothes. I immediately spotted Mom's car. They were already here. I entered the club through the back where the locker rooms were housed. Some of the teammates were there getting changed. Rally was there, the guy from last night. His real name was Raleigh but he preferred to spell it Rally, which I think is clever.
"Hey Ty," he said nicely.
"Hey," I replied. I eased over to him and whispered, "I'm sorry I was short with you last night. I was frustrated about a couple of things but I would like to be friends with you. I don't want to get things mixed up. Is that ok?"
"Yes," he said with some disappointment. "I like you, Ty. You are so, well, out there. I can't, um, I'm not out and I don't know things like you."
"I was there once too. But it only gets more complicated once you get there."
"You won't tell anyone about last night will you? I mean, they look at me funny around here anyway. It would be bad for me."
"Absolutely not. And they don't look at you funny. They just don't know you. I'm glad you came to the party last night. I think the guys got to know you better. You are super cute and now that you're looking, you will find someone. Just try to be mature and confident. Guys will like you," I said with a flirty grin. He was very gorgeous but he had a ways to go before he was in my league. He seemed happy with that exchange and I was glad it wasn't an awkward thing. I hoped we could be friends. He didn't seem to have an attitude about last night but his family is new to the club, and well, he thinks because he's black everyone is scrutinizing him. The fact is, everyone who's new gets scrutinized. He plays tennis well and plays in the sixth seat so he might get to play today but no promises. Then Beldon walked in and he looked like he was in a bad mood. He's the guy I challenged for third seat and well, looked like there was going to be hell to pay.
My phone beeped and I looked at it. Josh had sent me a funny gif of a guy hitting the tennis ball out into orbit. I giggled. Rally asked me what was funny. I showed him the gif and he said, "Aww,"
"Hey Ty," Beldon barked. "You better make good use of my seat today!" he said, slamming his locker and storming out.
"Oooh, he's nasty," said Rally.
"Yeah, I bet he is," I said.
So I was called to the entrance of the court and my first match of the day was on. I looked out and was able to find my supporters. Mom and dad were there. Josh would only make my second match because of work and I bet he was aching after last night. I saw Tristan and Jack which was cool. I'm so glad I had made it to one of Tristan's track meets. I hate not being fair but our athletic schedules overlap a lot. I took my place and my stance and my opponent served. The match was on and it didn't end like I hoped. The guy was good and had a strategic move I had to overcome which I didn't do well. He worked himself closer and closer to the net where he just barely tapped the ball which fell on my side, leaving me to scramble forward. Fuck!
In any case, I won the first set and he won the second and third sets. The match was his. I was fine shaking his hand and congratulating him. It was the locker room that unnerved me. Beldon was there and he was ready.
"Wow! Too bad I wasn't playing him. Maybe we would have a "better" outcome!" he barked and a couple of guys laughed.
"You know what Beldon? Let's hope you do better!" was all I could come up with.
"Beldon, Ty, shut it! You're not acting gentlemanly!" snapped the coach. I went on back to the lounge to drink water. At least there were friendlier faces there.
Damn, work is hard when your head is about to bust and your mouth tastes like stale beer! I just paused for a moment after doing a level A cleaning.
"Somebody done had them a rough night," one of the guys said, passing by me.
"Yeah, I overdid it," I replied.
"Water man. Drink water. It helps more than you know. Several of these guys had rough nights last night but you wouldn't know it. It's the water," he said. I looked around at guys working at their stations. Now that he mentioned it, I could spot one or two that were working in limited capacity. This made me laugh. I hope Ty was fairing out better. I would be glad to get over to the club and see what was going on.
When 3 pm arrived, I said my goodbyes to the teammates and clocked out. I had 30 minutes to get to the club and park. Ty said his second match would begin at 3:30 or after but wouldn't start before. I made it in fifteen minutes which was nice. Traffic was not bad. I got to the courts and was quickly greeted by Bryce and Kyle.
"Hey man, just in time. First match didn't go well but he has a chance to get through," Bryce announced. Bryce and Kyle. Why the fuck did that aggravate me so much!
"What's up, Kyle? Feeling better?" I asked. He laughed, "Well I'm better than I was. A leisurely afternoon watching tennis isn't the worst thing. I am fucking bonkers that I could come and support Ty. It's so cool seeing him in an athletic stance!" said Kyle. Ok, that was cool. I really appreciated that.
"Dude, you should have seen him last year. Ty was the court boss!" Bryce exclaimed. Ok, so I needed to settle my ass down and not see competition amongst friends who are here to support Ty. I hope he knows they are here for him. It would mean a lot for him to know after what he has said about these being MY friends.
"What happened first match?" I asked.
"Ty won first set but lost second two. It wasn't pretty bad. I hope it doesn't cause him to lose this match, especially since he won the third seat," Bryce said. I hoped not either but Bryce was well informed and that impressed me as well. We moved into the stands and there were seats by the parents. We joined them and right at 3:30, Ty's match was called.
I had to say that despite his loss earlier, he played fiercely this round. The sets were long as some of the volleys went on and on. Some stamina was required for this kind of play.
"Damn, I'm getting kind of tired watching it go back and forth," I said quietly to Bryce and Kyle. Bryce giggled and Kyle replied, "I feel ya!" Ty won first set, lost second set, and won third set! The match was his!
"Yeah!" I shouted while everyone was applauding.
"So what do you have going on tonight?" I asked Bryce.
"Having dinner with the Davis'. They wanted me to come over and catch up since it's been so damn long. Dinner at "the manor!" Bryce said in a fake British accent. "Isn't that nice?" I asked myself. I was hoping for a redo of the night before, this time just as friends and not as drunks.
"Not hardly," said Kyle. "They feel sorry for you, that you have gone without Davis style culture for so long!" Kyle quipped.
"They want me back, Kyle! I'm the son they wished they had!" Bryce replied, resulting in a punch to the arm. I just rode the wave with them, so to speak. This is "Old friends" shit and there wasn't any need getting wound up about it. It is what it is.
"Honey," said mom, "what's your plan tonight?" and she leaned in to me and whispered, "and it better NOT be coming home in a drunken stupor. Do you hear me?" she asked, not sounding as bad as it sounded.
"I have no plans so I thought I would just have dinner with you all," I said.
"Oh sorry, Josh. Bill and I are having dinner at the Dillard's house tonight. I thought you knew. Sorry," she said. Well damn. So much for that. And what the fuck? I wanted to be mad but at who? Ty for making plans with "the set" he's trying to get back in with? No, not fair. Bryce for going to see Kyle's family? Nope, not that either. Lisa and Ginny for being out of town? Couldn't help that. I caught a glimpse of Tristan and Jack. Relief! I moved down to the stands where they were standing.
"Hey guys," I said. "Did you enjoy the match?" I asked.
"Wow, that was so cool," Jack said. "Watching Ty out there was just amazing. I have never watched someone I know play tennis before. This was fun, wasn't it, Tri?" he asked.
"Yeah, it was good. Can't wait to see him," Tristan said.
"What's your plans tonight?" I asked.
"I'm going with Ty tonight and Jack and his mom are meeting up with his Dad who is coming in for the night," said Tristan
"Parents," confirmed Jack. Shit, there goes that idea.
"What's Jason up to these days?" I asked Jack.
"He's gone on spring break to the coast with his parents and "family friends," Jack said. Fuck!
Ty came out and Tristan ran to him.
"Josh, Tristan is ramping up this talk about needing some space. Ty has convinced him that I'm eating up too much time," and he snorted a laugh.
"I doubt Ty has "convinced" him of anything but if Tristan feels that way, respect it man. We absolutely cannot afford to lose these guys, Jack. I know he's your first real boyfriend but he's not going anywhere. I'm just figuring it out. They have to get their glow back, man."
"I hadn't thought of it like that but yeah, Tristan has been a downer lately. He's ok going after the group?" Jack asked.
"Yes, maybe it fuels them. Maybe it's what we really find attractive about them. Just don't push. Ty is already softening up on me. He's made a bunch of plans and I'm going to let him see them through."
"Tristan is right in there with him. They're going to some flea market tomorrow," Jack said with a scrunched nose.
"Oh great! I found that place during my "run." They need to get back together, Jack. They have fed off each for so long, I think the time away is getting to them. But don't worry, you have been so good to Tristan. He's not letting you get away."
"I really don't know what to do with myself when he's not around. Do you know how that feels?"
"Call me tonight, when I'm sitting at home eating a hot ham and cheese sandwich, catching up on Cobra Kai on Netflix!" I said, and he cracked up. Ty eased over to me.
"Hey Josh," he said, and leaned against me.
"You were fantastic, babe. I was so proud of you. You're a stud," I said devilishly and he grinned. "Bryce and Kyle were here to support you babe. They surprised me when I came in. They wanted you to know they were routing for you," and Ty's eyes widened.
"I saw them and I was so happy. Thank you all for being here. Today was a tough day for sure!" and we all launched into chat when a guy approached us I didn't know.
"Hey Ty, what are you doing? The guy asked.
"Hey Rally, these are my friends," and he introduced each of us. We all greeted him.
"I'm heading home. Just wanted to say see ya later," Rally said and turned and walked back to the club.
"Ok, that was awkward, Josh. I'm sorry," Ty said. I was a bit confused then I realized I just met "the guy" from last night. Well, he was cute, very fit body, the makings of a "player.". He looked a bit more mature than Ricky and Micah but a little less mature than Ty and Tristan. Fit body, though.
"No threat," Ty said.
"I didn't ask. I'm not worrying about that shit anymore, Ty. We're bigger threats to ourselves than any outsider," I said quietly to him.
"You're right," Ty said. "But I love you despite what kind of risks I pose," Ty said.
"No, I was referring to myself."
"Stop," he whispered.
"Guys," said Tristan, "we need to head out. Bye Jack, talk to you later?" he said and he kissed Jack. I reached out to Ty and took his arm. He mouthed a kiss to me and they walked back.
"So be it," said Jack. "Let's meet for lunch next week, man. I need some man to man time."
"You got it. Just say the word," I said and he slinked off.
I was following the parents back out to our cars. My phone bleeped and it was Diesel Gray.
<What up man?>
<What are you doing?>
<Notta! Fucking girl ditched on me.>
<I'm on my way. You gonna be there?>
<Hell yeah. You can get away? Come on!>
I ran through the parking lot and caught up with the parents.
"Hey mom!" I said, catching mom's attention. She turned and looked at me.
"Hey mom," I said, trying to catch my breath. "Everybody's busy tonight so I don't have anything to do. I'm heading out to see Diesel tonight. I really need to catch up with him," I said.
"Well..." mom slurred. "Last night..."
"Don't worry mom. That was a one off thing. I can't do that again. It's a good opportunity to catch up with him again," I said, trying not to sound like I was begging.
"OK, I guess it's fine," mom said.
"Josh, please drive carefully. Be safe, ok?" Bill said. He was quiet and I felt bad for him. I bet mom didn't tell him the whole truth about last night. His legal case was not going well and he was very stressed out. This was not a time to clutter his mind with teenage hijinks.
"I will, thank you, Dad," I said. "Y'all have fun with Principal Dillard!" and I sort of cracked up. "Let me think, how does "fun with Principal Dillard" look? Hmmmm," I said, looking up to the sky. Bill laughed.
"Thanks Josh, I needed a laugh," and he laughed again. "Fun with Principal Dillard!" and he bowed his head to laugh some more. I really loved this. Humor was a funny thing to Bill Breck. It had to be unexpected, there should be some imagery, and it should have some realism or sarcasm to it. I was getting good at it, knowing exactly when to deliver. His laugh kind of turned me on. It was so snobby. I still crack up laughing when I think of the look on his face when we were at the flea market, which was the last place he ever hoped to be. This made me feel good. These are times I wished I could call up Keith Burch and tell him what brought me down then what lifted me back up. He believes every "downer" has an "upper" and when you stop talking about the "upper", you're in trouble.
I texted Ty and told him I was heading out to the country. He was surprised but knew that time with my old friend was important. He ordered me to behave and not get "shit faced" again. I told him I didn't have the energy to do that again. Besides, Diesel Gray was a long time drinker and he no longer sought "partying." That's childish to him unless there is just some special reason to "throw down."
I ran home, took another quick shower which felt good. Changed clothes into something less "urban" and drove out. It was great mastering my car through the country, listening to some music on the radio. I got out there almost at dinner. Diesel met me on his front porch.
"Last time I was here..." I said.
"Don't worry about the last time you were here, Josh. You're here now. This time is different," and he led me into the house.
"I'm really glad to see you, Diesel. Shit going on at home is racking my nerves."
"It's funny, man. Country boy moves to the city then country boy comes back to heal from the city beating. It's an old story, dude," and he handed me a beer. Afterwards, we headed into town and got burgers from that place you only find in small towns. The burger joint with crinkle cut fries. It was so good to be home for an evening.
Despite how amazing our visit was, the night really got interesting when Micah and Caleb, driving through town, saw Diesel and me sitting out at a table, under the lights, eating. They pulled into the parking lot and came over to our table. I was wondering how serious those two had become. Was Caleb officially gay? Were they having sex?
In any case, they came back to Diesel's who was really nice to welcome them over. Of course, he had known Micah all his life. We had a few beers and talked and caught up. It really was a terrific time and seeing Caleb and Micah together was interesting. Micah said he wanted to talk to me and we walked out onto the porch together.
"Caleb and I are really good friends, Josh. He's weird because he doesn't know what he wants but he wants to be here as often as he can. What do you think?" he asked.
"I don't know, Micah. Ty and I have put people together and then we don't know what to make of `em. They keep changing and evolving. All I can say at this point is, if you're having fun and really like each other just go with the flow," and he laughed.
"That the best you can do?" he asked, cracking up.
"I'm not a specialist. Are you two..."
"I'm not going to say what we have done just yet. But Josh," and with a surprise lunge, he put his arms around me and gave me one of the best fucking kisses I have ever had. Wet and sexy didn't begin to describe it, especially when he grabbed by bottom lip and sucked it in. I pulled away in shock.
"Jesus, Micah. What the fuck was that about?" I asked.
"You taught me that Josh. You and Ty introduced me to the best thing ever. I wanted to demonstrate!" he chirped. "Don't tell Ty! Don't want him to get mad!"
"Oh it would take a lot worse than that but your "demonstration" was effective. That was fantastic, Micah. If that's what Caleb is getting, I"m sure you'll keep him coming back!" and he grinned, flashing some nice teeth. Micah was really a cutie, very special.
"Let's go in before Caleb gets mad," I said. We walked in and back to the kitchen where Caleb and Diesel were discussing the current political situation. .
"Ewww! That's disgusting!" Micah said.
"I think Gray is very interesting," Caleb said. I loved how Caleb was so proper, not going with Diesel's nickname.
"You would be the first!" I remarked.
"Fucker!" said Diesel.
It was a good night and I think I now completely understood what Ty has been talking about. Diversity was definitely good, maybe more necessary than we thought. "Just you and me" was a good thought but it wasn't always true.
After everyone was gone, Diesel and I were plopped on the sofa, comparing notes on the evening. This was certainly not his usual crowd and that his "usual crowd" didn't seem to exist anymore. It's funny that everyone seems to be thinking and feeling the same thing. Was it the season or senioritis?
"Josh, I've been thinking about one of your stories and I think I have a really good idea for your "prom" thing. It should fit in nicely with your "city slicker" style. Let me tell you what I think..."