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A New Form of Sonata
CHAPTER 2
First day of school. The vibe inside the campus is high with excitement. Looking around the parking lot, I can see every kind of students that are present and they are everywhere. Nerds reading and studying the textbooks under the trees or in the park, Cheerleaders in the grassy areas together with the jocks, specifically the football players all looking hot in their uniforms. And of course, musicians roaming around the school holding their cello, violin, flute case and some other instruments.
I'm not that surprised about the musicians and the jocks. The school that I'm attending attracts personalities like instrumentalist and singers. I heard from Aunt Clara that the school won the choral competition, their drumline, and also their orchestra. Music club is also the biggest club in the school. They are good also at sports. Sure, this school is home for the talented people! With all these talents, I'm worried that I might not fit in because I had the feeling that I don't fit here anymore .
When I get inside the school, everyone's eyes are on me. I felt weird being stared like I was some freak. Oh well, I got that a lot since I stop playing, but to be honest, I'm not used to be stared at. I just walk forward face down, looking at the ground, avoiding some unnecessary attention from others. I look at my schedule trying to find my homeroom. Good God! This school is huge, but I'm lucky they gave me a map so it would be easier to locate my classes.
"AP Calculus at building 2, room 5A. 5A... 5A..." I look around the school building still humming room 5A. Still looking around then back at the map making sure I'm in the right building when I saw a teacher coming my way.
"Are you lost, young man?" she asks. When I look at the teacher, she gasps and her eyes widen like she saw a ghost., "Jason Tyler? Are you Jason Tyler?"
"Yes ma'am. I'm Jason Tyler. I can't find room 5A, but I'm sure that I'm in the right building." I replied,
"Oh my God! The Jason Tyler is here. I'm an AP Chemistry teacher. You can call me Miss Wright" She giggled loudly "I'm sorry about that Mr. Tyler. I can't believe that a talented boy like you will be attending this school. Room 5A is on the 3rd floor. By the way, are you taking a Music subject?"
"Yes ma'am. AP Music Theory actually after lunch."
"That's great. See you in a bit Mr. Tyler."
I said goodbye to Miss Wright and headed to the homeroom. Standing in front of the door I paused, I felt afraid to open it. Hearing loud noises in room makes me anxious in some point. Oh... how I wish I was the first person to be inside the room, but there is no turning back. I'll be late if I don't go inside and I don't want to make a bad impression on my first day.
I open the door and slowly enter the room. Everyone stops talking and I heard some small gasps coming from others like the surprise expression the teacher that I recently met a while ago in the hallway. I saw an empty chair in the end aisle beside the window. As I walk toward the chair I can sense everyone's eyes are following me. This is so creepy. Will these people never stop looking at me? To my surprise, someone came up to me. The girl in front of me look like she is blushing and she was playing with her thumb. The girl looks beautiful but she is not clearly my type and all.
"Y-you're Jason Tyler, right?" she mumbled.
"Yeah. I'm Jason Tyler and may I know your name?" She giggle loudly and some other girls are shouting like they saw a celebrity inside the campus. Damn! These girls know how to make some high pitched squeals. All those sharp tones can seriously damage the ear. Some of the girls got up and walked towards me, offering their hands and telling me their name. Oh man... this is getting weird. Minutes past when I hear someone come inside and yell firmly for everyone to take their seats. Everyone obeys and they take their seats as the teacher start the class. This is going to be a long day.
I was mentally and physically exhausted after all greetings that I receive from my fellow students. Their screams and shouts is all I can hear, even inside cafeteria. I've never thought that I was this popular despite that this is my first day. After lunch, I walk out the cafeteria and look outside. On the map and I saw a little pond just near the cafeteria. I decided to go to it and find a place where no one can disturb me. There is no one near the pond as I get closer. This could be a good hiding place for a while. As I walk closer to the pond, I hear someone playing violin. I listen for a moment and I decide to find out who is playing. As I walk toward the source, the volume becomes louder. I look to my right where I see a girl playing a violin. The melody is beautiful but it lacks something. She is playing `Rondino on the Theme by Beethoven'. I listen more of her playing and sometime later I figure what she was lacking.
"You play good, but your tempo and notes are not stable. Make it a little softer. Try to waltz with the music." she stops playing and looks back at me. Her eyes widen like she was caught doing something wrong.
"Oh...oh I'm sorry if I scared you and I'm so sorry for interrupting you. I'm Jason Tyler and I'm new in here. I just want some time to be alone and I heard someone playing a violin and I can't help myself to wonder who is playing, a-and from the way you play the music, I figure that you might need some help." I said as my voice was fading in the last five words.
"It's okay. Really, it's fine. Man! you really scared the shit out of me when you started to give some comments about how I play. I'm Michelle Gran by the way. So you're the famous pianist, Jason Tyler. I can't believe that you're talking to me," she replied shyly
"Why should I not be talking to you? Your music made me come here and the notes were begging me to help you. Oh man... You think I'm a freak now, saying all of those words."
"No, you're cool! If you know, social standing is really important in this school. If you are a nobody in this school, no one will approach you or be your friend." She said as sadness etch in her face. "Thanks for the offer by the way. I was practicing for the eliminations. If I don't play good, they will kick my ass out in the club." I needed to help her. I put my hand on my chin and frowned.
"Come on and play again, I'll listen and teach you some things. You'll be a good violinist in no time." I offered
"Really? Thank you so much. Oh gosh! Jason Tyler is going to teach me how play and become a better violinist" She giggled and she put her violin under her left side as she tilted her head a little as her chin touched the chinrest of the violin and put the bow on top of the strings.
She began to play the song again as I looked for what seemed to be off in the way she's playing. There were times that she came too slow, sometimes she played too fast or too loud. She was so uncoordinated with the tempo and the notes were everywhere. The only image that I could see in the way she played is that, I was in the dumpster surrounded by piles of garbage. What is happening to her? She is not connected to her violin and I can feel that she is rejecting the composer's way of playing. The music is not for her. I try to correct some points, especially in the second stanza and how to make some prolongs and the correct way of performing some crescendo and decrescendo.
After a good half hour lecturing and correcting, she played the score right, but she seems to be uncomfortable in the way she plays, like she was pushing to get through the score. The image that I need to get out of her, was not there. The music felt so empty. What should I do now? Think Jason... think...
"Um, Michelle? Can you play something else? I'd like to hear you play with another score."
"Uhh... Sure. I'll try. This one is my favorite." I said as she placed the violin in her left side as she prepare to play. When she began to play, the image burst out immediately as she began the first 5 notes of the song. I was in awe in the way she played the song. As I was listening to the music, something was a little bit different on the way Michelle she played the score. I am pretty sure that she was playing `Praeludium and Allegro in the style of Pugnani' by Fritz Kreisler but it was entirely different.
The tempo are fast but pleasant, the melody sang and not even a single note out of tune. The way she played, was... outstanding. This is the type of playing that I wanted to hear. Full of love and burning passion in her violin. It was barbaric, lively, and fun. So, it was hidden all the time. The talent that's supposed to be showcase to the world was just hiding inside her.
I was so mesmerized by the way she played and that I didn't care what was happening in my surroundings. All I felt was her music and the images she created. When she was done playing, everything was back to reality. That how she should play. She has talent, and that talent of hers will make her famous above all. She played it like a professional violinist. Alas, a bond was form.
"Wow! That's the way you should do it. That way of playing can make you popular in no time. You really have talent. We'll be good friends for sure" I cheerfully told her and she gave me a big grin and then she blush. "Really? you wanna be friends with me?" she asked with a shocked expression.
"Yeah! I want you to be my friend and I want help you improve your skill in playing violin. I promise you, I'll put your name in the stage as one of the best performers." I give her my best smile as she blushed deeply
"Oh my god! you really are going do that? knowing that I'm just a big loser in school."
"You are not a loser. This is the day that you'll change. Now, I want you to play the song in the elimination the way you played just now, OK?"
"Oh... Thank you so much Jason." she said as she began to sob. Shit! Now, I made her cry. I tell her to stop crying and she wiped her tears in her eyes. "Oh, I'm so sorry! This is so embarrassing. My god! I'm gonna be so in love with you right now." I was taken aback about she told me that I needed to tell her.
"About that... I uhh... I'm... gay Michelle" I was so shy about telling her. My god! I've never told anyone in the campus and now, she is the first person shared it with, but I was even more surprised by how she replied
"So the rumor is true then! You're the talk of the school and all you do is reject girls. That stick up your butt treating them like they are your servants, but damn! you really look hot and all, even though you are skinny and those eyes of yours? Even the biggest, most intimidating man could fall in love in those eye of yours and the way you play piano? Ahw! It was the best I've ever heard in my entire life. I wanna hear you play piano someday. Oh... And that hair of yours is awesome." Wow! Her praises makes me go turtle mode. I go shy when someone is praising me. It was not a new thing when I was playing piano but still, it make me go shy.
"My first day of school and there is rumor about me already. That's great! But anytime soon, I'll come out. And thanks for the compliment. About playing piano, I uhh... umm... I... don't play piano anymore" I said to her as I look down at my feet. It's really make me depressed when someone asks me to play piano. Ever since mom died, my passion and the piano was gone, especially that now, I can't hear the sound of the piano when I play. It feels like a punishment or some sort of curse. My hands are off limit for playing piano.
She gasp in surprise of me, knowing the news that I can't play piano. She ask why but I can't tell her. Good thing her never push that topic that i really don't want to back in history, but someday, she will know. I make her practice playing her song for another half an hour as we do some major changes in the song. Now, she'll play it in her own way and everyone gonna love it.
Instead of attending my AP Music Theory subject, all student were being summoned to the auditorium for what the school called the Death play'. This death play is an elimination competition for the music club members. They eliminate members that are not fit to play or so they are called useless' in the club. This school has some real weird stuff happening when it come to their music club.
As Michelle and I headed towards the auditorium, everyone's eyes were on us. I heard someone ask why I was hanging out with that loser? Damn these social standings and all this loser bullshit! They really don't know how good Michelle can play. They are bunch of dumb assholes. I was going to curse out the person who called Michelle a loser but Michelle stop me by grabbing my wrist and she nodded sideways saying no.
As we hung out for a while in the auditorium, I learned that she was a senior like me but she was in mostly regular classes and the only AP subject that she was in is the music theory, so I guess will be classmates with the rest of the music club members. I wish her good luck as she headed toward the backstage so that she can prepare for the elimination.
I sat together with my AP Calculus classmates as we're all waiting for this death play to begin. I look around the auditorium and it seem that everyone is present for the show. This school really has a lot of students. I look behind and I see someone is staring at me. I have this skeptical look at the guy and he just grins back at me. The guy is handsome and muscular. From the way he dresses, he seems to be on the football team. So, those guys must the jocks; the masters of this school. I guess I better not to mess with them.
I look back, facing the stage when a guy comes up beside me. I turn my gaze towards him and oh, my, god! It's the same guy who was staring at me before. He looked more handsome and sexy up close. Bulging muscles in both arms, thighs that look like a truck. He clearly is a giant. Standing at six foot two he makes me look a little kid at my five foot seven inches. Mr. muscular had blond hair that is cut short like a military cut and gray eyes. He smiles widely showing his pearly white teeth.
"Is this chair is taken?" Man! Even his voice is sexy. Deep baritone voice that anyone could fall in love with .. This guy sure can get whatever he wants, but this kind of emotion can't make me go mushy and go girly. I'm good at concealing my thoughts and emotions.
"Nope! you can have it." I said flatly. He take his seat beside me and he looks back. I guess he was telling his friend as I can feel he was waving his hands and he is pointing right hand towards me. I can hear giggles on my left side as my classmates look at the guy beside me and they began to whisper. Girls! I really don't understand them.
"Your name's Jason right? I'm Trey. Trey Johnson." he said as he offer his hand for a handshake.
"Nice to meet you, Trey Johnson and yes, I'm Jason Tyler" I said as I take his hand for a handshake and look eye to eye. He held my hand a little bit longer and I clear my throat so that he can let go. He gave me a charming smile but it never really struck. I admit, he is handsome and sexy, but the fact that he is straight reminds me that he is off limits(I think), but I was a little confused about his actions. Maybe, he knows about the rumors of me being gay that's why he is flirting on me.
I listen to the performers and the way they playing was boring. This Trey guy did glance my way sometimes and then look back at the stage. He also asks some random stupid questions but I'm barely paying attention. There is one performer, a pianist, who plays pretty good on the stage but there are some wrong notes during his performance, but over all, it was good. I was a little bit nervous because Michelle was up next. I was in the middle of listening the way the guy played the piano when I was taken aback of what Trey asked.
"I heard from someone said that you're gay. Is that true?" I open and close my mouth, trying to say something, but no words came out because, I was shock at his question. This rumor mill working really quickly in such a short period of time. I drew a sharp breath and look at him hard in the eyes and said,
"If I am, so what? Will you and your friends will beat the crap out of me?" I said strongly. I need to show them that I am not the kind of person to be messed with. I need to be strong.
"Chill dude. I won't do such a thing. I'm cool with that. I'm just wanna know that no one can outrank me since that you have become the talk of the school. Hearing from others that a world class pianist will be a student in this school. You sure are a celebrity, for a little guy." What a jerk. All he think is his popularity. I don't need those. He leaned toward my right ear and said:
"You are feisty and really cute. Those eyes of yours are beyond everything. I like it." the huskiness of his voice and his breath tickled my ear make my body shiver as I can feel heat getting out of my body as he said it just for my ears only. I was blushing and I can't believe I'm having a hard-on with just the way Trey talks. He really is flirting at me. I just turn my head back towards the stage.
"Are you flirting on me?" I raise an eyebrow and I cross my hands in my chest still look in front of the stage.
"What if I am?" He says more husky and more deeper as he leans in closer to me and lick the tip of my earlobe lightly. Christ in heaven!, he smells really good and he just like my ear. This public display of affection is so inappropriate inside the auditorium and I heard some of his friend chuckled and laugh behind us. I need to control myself before I make a fucking scene. Jason, focus!
"Well, stop that crap Trey Johnson! Now you know that I am gay, keep you mouth shut and pay attention in front of the stage. My friend will perform next and I don't want to be disturbed." I said with a volume that only the two of us can hear as my eyes are glued on stage, not even looking at Trey. I don't want him to see me blush. God! I'm such a dork. Come on Jason, pull yourself together. I inhale and exhale deeply and blink my eyes twice as Michelle takes a bow out to the crowd.
Michelle stood at the center of the stage, nervously. I wave my hand so that she can see me. She looked in my direction and gave me a smile and I give her two thumbs up for courage. Oh dear Lord, I wish Michelle won't mess up her performance. The teachers who I assume to be the critics tell Michelle to begin. She looks back at her accompanist and she gives a nod to begin.
She starts with a firm and powerful stroke of notes and everyone gasps when she starts to play. I smile as she does what we have planned at lunch. I made some minor adjustment on her way of playing that can make quite a surprise to the audience. I look around and I can see that everyone's ears are on her. That is good. I promise Michelle she was no longer a loser, but an awesome violinist. I turn my gaze back at her, listening to her play. As I listen, there' s something that is off yet, no one will notice it but me, she still needs an image to make the music more beautiful. She need to imagine. She needs to feel the music. She needs to be one with her violin.
Michelle stops when she finishes the half the song. She pants heavily and she places her bow back at the violin and then she continues the song. Everyone is stunned when she played the Allegro part of the music. Her hands move so fast as she plays the music then, an image is displayed. A lot of shining yellow dots surrounded her and a lot of cameras are flashing as she was playing. The vibe began to change. The auditorium begins to look so luxurious as she plays. So, this is the image that she wants me to see. This is her dream.
The tempo suddenly changes and everyone including myself gasps as the music that she created becomes more and more powerful. This is the pace that she played a while ago when were at the small pond. Her way of playing. You can feel the freedom that she expresses in her music. She is a truly a magnificent performer. No doubt she will become a world class violinist.
She's feels the music now. This is the real Michelle Gran that once she called herself a loser will become a rising star. She gently slides the bow back and forth onto the strings of her violin as she closes her eye and I see a tear, rolling in her cheeks as she plays the last stanza of `Praeludium and Allegro in the style of Pugnani' . She finally grasped what she needed to do. She finally did it. I was so proud that day.
Student's mouths hang open, and can't believe that Michelle can play such a beautiful number. I can say, this is the best performance I have ever heard in my entire life. I have heard a lot of good and best performers during my days, but no one really satisfies me. My heart pound forcefully as I look at her in the stage. Maybe, just maybe, she can help me bring back the real me.
The auditorium was in silence and I can see that the students are a little bit confused and shocked at the same time. I broke the silence inside as I am the first person to stand and give her a round of applause and yell `good job' at her while giving her a two thumbs up. The students look at me for a moment the back to Michelle, then applause erupted inside the whole auditorium as they are awaken from the trance that Michelle made. Most of the students and some teachers are on their feet as they clap their hands, amazed by her performance.
I was happy when they announce that Michelle will be staying in the club and another surprise that came to her when one of the jury wants to see her and tell her that she will be competing for the state violin competition and our school be the host for the competition. Michelle beams at the news and when the jury makes its exit, Michelle broke down hugging me crying and she thanks me for helping her. I soothe her by rubbing her hair as she calm down.
I promise that I'll be with her for the upcoming competition in the next four months. We celebrate at my house for her first victory. I introduce her to Aunt Clara and Uncle Max and Aunt Clara was happy that I have a new friend. After we eat, she told me that it's her first to be in a competition and she was nervous, thinking about letting down the school and everyone will hate her. I told her that it's going to be fine as long as we're together.
I ask Aunt Clara if she will be her accompanist for her practice and hopefully, in her upcoming competition. I was zoned out for a while thinking and hoping that I wish I could be her accompanist as we were planning and deciding on what song should MIchelle play, but in this kind of situation that I have could ruin Michelle's performance.
"Jason, hello... earth to Jason..." Michelle called out as she snap her fingers in front of me. "Are you ok?"
I look at her and said "I fine Michelle. I was a little bit zoned out. What was that again?"
"Why are you zoned out Jase? Is something wrong?" she asked curiously
"It's nothing Michelle. I swear, I'm fine." I reply and both of them look at me with worry in their faces, especially Aunt Clara. I excuse myself as I tell them that I'll be in my room to change. I hear both Aunt Clara and Michelle talk, but I really don't pay attention on what are they talking about, as I am not that kind of person that listens to other people's conversation.
After our celebration, I take Michelle back at her house and I meet her mom and dad. They own a small yet lovely and cozy cafe and I see a small Casio Celviano hybrid piano beside the counter. Michelle puts her violin case on the top of the piano and she prepares some Iced latte. I walk toward the piano and stare at it. The longer I stare at the piano, I can feel the piano is swallowing me whole and the background began to turn dark. I was about to scream when I felt a hand reach out and tap on my right shoulder. Thank goodness I was back I reality.
"Are you sure you're OK?" I can tell that Michelle is worried as she offers me an ice latte. I take it and sip at it. Hmm... Michelle makes awesome ice latte.
"I'm fine. Damn! This latte is delicious."
"Thanks." she grins at me as I give her a small smile.
We talk for a while about happy memories from my past. I felt happy to open up without worries and hesitation. After our talk and our latte, I say goodbye to her and she thanks me once again for teaching her. I felt free that day. I was home and I head directly to my favorite room when I was a kid. Aunt Clara's piano room is big as ours back home but a little different in design and furniture. I walk toward the shiny piano and I slide my fingers on the keys of the piano when I hear Aunt Clara ask:
"Did you have fun at Michelle's?"
"Yeah! I did Aunt Clara." "That's good! Michelle is a very nice and polite lady. You and her will be good friends." She paused for a while and ask "Um... Jason, do you miss playing piano,?" I look directly in her eyes and then I just nod my head and shut my mouth.
"So, umm... if you need someone to talk to, I'll be at the living room" Aunt Clara closes the piano room's door. She knows that I want to be alone. For the longest years that I'm with Aunt Clara and Uncle Max, It's like they can read my feeling and sometimes, what I'm thinking. As I touch it, I remember some good times when mom and Aunt Clara taught me how to play piano.
I stare at the piano or a while, mentally debating if I'll try to play or not. Overruled by my feeling to play, I sat at the piano chair and I adjust myself while thinking what should I play. Comfortable, I put both of my hands at the keys and take a deep breath as I close my eyes together. I let go the air inside my lungs and relax for for eight second. I open my eyes and push the keys of the piano, playing Love's Sorrow by Fritz Kreisler which my mom used play it always when I was five.
I had a very good start with my music. I'm starting to think of a scenery that I want to picture for the first few notes. As I was playing, a familiar feeling creep up my body as I tap the keys and now, the only picture that I can see was black background but I can still hear the piano. That is good sign! I was near in the fast part of the music when suddenly, the sound of the piano began to fade and I can feel again like I was under the ocean.
I took my hand immediately and look at the piano wide eye as I put my hand on my ears as tears starting to leak like a faucet. Those horrible memories had me in tears once again and a moment later, I was sobbing hard in front of the piano. I look up the ceiling, still sobbing and said softly:
"Please mom. Help me play piano again."
****** End of Chapter 2 ****** Songs listed in this chapter
*** I know most people are not a fan of Classical music, but I recommend that you should listen to this music that is in the story. If you have Spotify, better:)
---Praeludium and Allegro in the style of Puganini: by Fritz Kreisler
---Rondino on a Theme by Beethoven: by Fritz Kreisler
---Liebesleid (Love's Sorrow in piano version): by Fritz Kreisler (this music also has a violin version)
That's it for now. Chapter 3 is coming soon with some smooches and kisses.. (LOL) Feel free to leave a comment at silverphoenix606@gmail.com. Until next time.. Peace!!
Yuma